Whats up im Spike from Fort Worth texas. Im 24 years old , I love Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Charmed And most of all The Vampire Diaries. I love to read all the time, but im not much of a writer but im trying to learn. Damon is a sex GOD!
Favorite TV shows: The Vampire Diaries, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Charmed, Angel, X-Files, Supernatural, True Blood
If people think you are mentally insane...copy and paste this onto your profile.
If they are right... copy and paste this into your profile.
I you are in love with a fictional character copy and paste this into your profile.
Damon! Damon! Damon! Damon! Damon! If you are obsessed with Damon Salvator then copy and paste this into your profile.
If the only thing that you think about is Vampire Diaries sereis copy and paste this into your profile.
If you are on Team Damon copy and paste this into your profile.
If you believe that your own Damon Salvatore is out there copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever had a paper cut and sucked the blood copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have your own little world copy and paste this into your profile.
If there are time that you want to annoy people just for the heck of it copy and paste this into your profile
If you have ever walked into a room and forgotten what you came for copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever read a 600+ page book in one day copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever read through the night copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have a little voice in your head that talks to you constantly and wont shut up copy and paste this into your profile.
Signs of Insanity
1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries with that.
4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It "In."
5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.
6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Smuggling Diamonds."
7. Finish All Your Sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy."
8. Don't use any punctuation
9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.
10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go."
12. Sing Along At The Opera.
13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme
14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play Tropical Sounds All Day.
15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In The Mood.
16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.
17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won! I Won!"
18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking Lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives, They're Loose!!"
19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."
More Stuff to Annoy People
1) When talking to someone, tilt your head to the side.
2) Snicker at what someone said and say "I got the movie reference". (I did this. Everyone around me was confused for at least five minutes... enough time for me to walk away)
3. Start each meal by conspicuously licking all your food, and announce that this is so no one will "swipe your grub."
4.Name your dog "Dog."
5. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."
6. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what you think." (My best friend got so mad at me when I did this to her. She growled at me. It was frightening)
7. Claim that you must always wear a bicycle helmet as part of your "astronaut training."
9. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
10. Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing awkward silences with the impression that you'll be saying more any moment. (This one is fun. It's even more fun to walk away right after so they are left feeling confused and awkward)
11. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."
12. Tell 1-800 operators they sound gay and ask for a date.
13. Sew anti-theft detector strips into people's backpacks.
19. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.
20. Repeat everything someone says as a question.
21. Write "X - BURIED TREASURE" in random spots on all of someone's road maps.
25. Wander around a restaurant, asking other diners for their parsley. (I almost did this while I was in New York. My grandmother stopped me, though)
26. At the Laundromat, use one dryer for each of your socks.
27. Stand over someone's shoulder, mumbling as they read. (This annoys my mom to no end. Especially when she's writing her book)
28. Ask people what gender they are.
29. Lick the filling out of all the Oreos, and place the cookie parts back in the tray.
30. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.
31. Lie obviously about trivial things such as the time of day. (he he, I said it was 25 o clock and my friends were confused)
32. Leave your Christmas lights up and lit until September. (Lol, we did that because we just forgot about them)
33. Change your name to "John Aaaaasmith" for the great glory of being first in the phone book. Claim it's a Hawaiian name, and demand that people pronounce each "a." ( I so want to do this. But I'll be Jane Aaaaasmith)
35. Chew on pens that you've borrowed. (I forget I borrow them and then watch the person's face as I do, not really sure why they're looking at me like that)
39. Mow your lawn with scissors.
41. Ask the waitress for an extra seat for your "imaginary friend."
46. Make appointments for the 31st of September. (I did this one once. It was kind of an accident but they agreed so, hey)
47. Invite lots of people to other people's parties.
48. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 99 copies.
49. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage."
50. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.
51. Practice making fax and modem noises.
54. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears. (I plan on doing that one soon)
55. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room. (Lol, I love to do that. Everyone gets really confused because I usually do it while my teachers are in the middle of teaching)
56. Holler random numbers while someone is counting. (My friends get so angry when I do this)
57. Staple papers in the middle of the page. (I did that accidentally once)
59. Honk and wave to strangers.
64. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "No, wait, I messed it up," and repeat.
65. Sing the theme to the Batman television show as loudly as you can, over and over and over..
66. Tell people their accent isn't fooling anyone.
67. Drum on every available surface.
68. Write the surprise ending to a novel on its first page.
69. Set alarms for random times.
70. Learn Morse code and have conversations with friends in public consisting of "Beeeep bip bip beeeep bip.."
71. Buy large quantities of mint dental floss just to lick the flavor off.
75. Begin all your sentences with "Ohh la la!"
77. Leave someone's printer in compressed-italic-landscape mode.
78. Pay for your dinner with pennies.
79. Tie jingle bells to all your clothes.
80. Repeat everything someone says, as a question.
81. Leave tips in Bolivian currency.
82. Demand that everyone address you as "Conquistador."
83. Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly. (lol that is so strange)
84. When Christmas caroling, sing "Jingle bells, Batman smells" until physically restrained.
86. Finish the 99 bottles of beer song. (I did, whilst following my mom around the house. She was really mad)
88. Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles.
89. Pretend your mouse is a CB radio, and talk into it.
91. Inform others that they exist only in your imagination.
92. Cultivate a Norwegian accent. If Norwegian, affect a southern drawl.
93. "Forget" the punch line to a long joke, but assure the listener it was a "real hoot."
94. Routinely handcuff yourself to furniture, informing the curious that you don't want to fall off "in case the big one comes."
96. Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance.
97. Ask to "interface" with someone.
98. Incessantly recite annoying phrases, such as "sticky wicket isn't cricket."
99. Stare at static on the TV and claim you can see a "magic picture."
100. Scuff your feet on a dry, shaggy carpet and seek out victims.
101. Never make eye contact.
102. Never break eye contact.
103. Construct your own pretend "tricorder," and "scan" people with it, pronouncing the results. (yay Star Trek reference! I do this all the time)
104. Give a play-by-play account of a person's every action in a nasal Howard Cossell voice.
105. Occasionally bark in a high-pitched voice. (I bleat like a sheep instead. Much more interesting of an effect)
106. Say "okay, you're gay" to anything someone says.
107. As people talk, smell their shoulders.
108. When in a conversation, look out the window, then say "Wait, start over. I wasn't paying attention."
109. Say to people, "Did you wear deodorant today?"
110. Place your shoes on the table. (I did this at dinner tonight. My parents looked at me funny)
111. When talking to someone, look at a spot about two inches to their right. (I zone out when people talk to me sometimes and do this subconsciously)
112. When standing near a "high-class person," ask them, "Excuse me, but do I have a booger hanging on my nose? I thought I picked it off."
113. Switch your neighbor's lawn furniture with someone else's. (ha ha, my to do list has just gotten a little bigger)
114. Call into work and tell them you have something better to do today.
115. Buy goldfish and ask the clerk if they come with chips.
116. Sample every flavor of ice cream and tell the clerk what you don't like about each one.
117. Pick your ear wax and ask if you could use their sleeve to wipe it off.
118. Insist completely ridiculous things are true - like Bush is still President.
119. Speak in a strong Welsh accent.
120. Wear odd shoes.
122. Disagree strongly with everything anybody says. (this is really great especially if you and the person you're conversing with both know they're right)
123. Throw stones at people walking past your house. (ha ha, that one is fun, I accidentally hit my neighbor once)
124. Keep changing the TV channel every two seconds.
126. Whenever anyone says something, laugh loudly as if they have just told an extremely funny joke.
127. Phone McDonald's and try to make a reservation for that evening.
128. Spend an entire weekend pretending you are R2-D2.
129. Phone random numbers and tell them you are holding their daughter hostage.
130. Recite the first 4,000 decimal places of Pi. Then ask if people want to hear it in binary, too.
131. Pretend you have gone completely deaf.
132. .sdrawkcab etirW
133. Walk into people's houses, go straight to the fridge without saying hello, and help yourself to their food.
134. Speak so quietly that people always have to get you to repeat it.
135. Loudly recite people's most embarrassing secrets in restaurants.
136. Play the electric guitar very loudly and badly, then when the neighbors ask you to turn it down, play even louder. When they come round to complain again, say, "Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you asked me to turn it up!
137. Try to fit the word "cornucopia" into every sentence you say. (I did this for a whole week)
138. Drive on the wrong side of the road.
139. Secretly learn to play the piano, then go to a friend's house who has a piano. Claim you've never played before then play Jesu Joy of Man's Desiring perfectly the first time. Then say, "I guess I must kinda be a natural."
141. Claim that until recently, you thought Michael Jackson was a woman.
142. Wear your cap backwards and say "Yo, wazzup?" a lot.
144. Tell everyone you are Bill Clinton's cousin.
145. Take photos of people walking down the street and then run away. (This is especially annoying if they know you)
146. Dedicate your life to politics, become president of the United States, then raise all taxes to 90.
147. Down a can of Coke in one drink and then burp loudly.
149. Bark like a dog whenever anyone says the word "the."
150. Wire up people's cars so the horn comes on as soon as their car is started.
151. Ride a unicycle to work.
152. E-mail Microsoft to tell them about bugs in Windows XP that aren't actually there. (This one is impossible, as there is always some sort of bug in any given place in Windows)
153. Stare at people for about five minutes, making sure they know you're staring at them. Then, slowly sneak up to them while humming the Mission: Impossible theme. Sniff their head, then run away. Repeat. (lol, I am so doing this!)
154. Continuously mumble during a conversation.
155. Take off the eraser to every pencil in your house, or better yet, someone else's house.
156. When in a chat room, spell everything incorrectly.
157. Insist on "Weird Al" sing-a-longs.
158. On a hot summer day, ride up and down the road and drench pedestrians with squirt guns.
159. When walking down a main road, act like a drunk.
160. Wear nothing but white and go mud wrestling.
161. Walk up to someone eating. Lean over and stare at them intently until they notice. Continue to do so until they ask what you're doing. Reply, "I've been watching you eat for the last 30 seconds.. You're weird!" Leave the restaurant.
162. When walking, talk to yourself constantly. (people hate it when I do this because I tend to talk about them)
163. Move people's bookmarks ahead three pages when they aren't looking. (my friends don't let me near their books any more)
164. Call the operator. When asked, "Can I help you?" reply, "No thanks, just browsing."
165. Go to a gumball machine insert coins until you have a matching pair of fake eyeballs. After attaining these, record the theme song of The Twilight Zone over and over again. Drive down the street wearing the eyeballs and playing The Twilight Zone theme very loud. When you get pulled over, leap into the passenger's seat and claim, "He was here a minute ago, officer!"
166. On a night other than Halloween, get a few friends together and dress like Jason from Friday the 13th. Have each of you stand a mile apart on a highway.
167. After visiting the local donut shop, sit on the floor cross-legged and insist in a childish voice that you haven't received enough chocolate sprinkles.
168. Push a raisin into someone's cream-filled donut.
169. Spread fertilizer on half your neighbor's lawn.
170. Add A535 (liquid heat) to that little hole down the center of someone's anti-perspirant.
174. Call every pager number you know and leave the number for your local McDonald's.
175. Wash and scrub the trees in your front lawn.
176. Throw newspapers back at paperboys. (they stopped delivering them at my house)
177. Tell people their fly is down when they're wearing sweat pants.
178. Stand on a busy corner. Gasp, look and point up. See how many people look.
179. At random times in a conversation, say "Hi," "Hello Sir, how are you?" or "Have a good day, thank you." (I just did that one just now)
180. Put electrical tape over the headlights of someone's car.
181. Walk up to random strangers insisting you are family.
182. Dress like a "High-class rich person" and wash windows at random street corners. Demand a dollar in a British accent.
183. When a cop pulls you over, when they step up to your car, drive forward slowly and make them walk. Especially if it's raining. (as soon as I get a car...)
184. In an office, lock all the doors behind you.
185. Face the back when standing in an elevator. (You tend to receve strange looks when you do this...)
186. Grin so wide it hurts your cheeks at every salesperson in town.
187. When at an ATM, try to have a conversation with it, or pretend it stole your card. (This works best if there's a line.)
188. Unbend all the paperclips you can find, then replace every eraser you can find with a rubber band.
189. Ask people to prove everything they say. (e.g. "I'm Bob, nice to meet you..." "PROVE IT!")
190. Sharpen All your pencils to the same size EXACTLY.
191. Answer every question with another question. As soon as one of you says a statement instead of a question, shout "I win!". (I did this to my sister once. she looked at me funny and walked away)
192. Pose as a client at a bank or other professional institution, and when you are seated in front of their desk, keep rearranging the items on top into different patterns and tell them you are "just reorganizing things."
193. Instead of singing 99 bottles of beer on the wall, sing 999,999,999 bottles of beer on the wall! (I started to right after singing the 99 bottles of beer song to my mom)
194. Call every girl you know "dude".
196. Bring a portable CD player to a concert and listen the CD because you insist that it is "Just better quality"
197. Press the "power" button on on someone's computer or keyboard when they're almost finished typing up a long essay, story etc. Apologize sincerely, claiming that you thought it was the focus adjustment.
198. Call 911 and breathe heavily.
199. Take a shower. Feel guilty. Give it back.
200. Mow your carpet. (Or preferably somebody else's)
201. Vacuum your lawn. (See note on 200)
202. Recite shakespearian poetry to everyone you meet. ( I'm trying to do this and it's going really well so far)
203. Go to McDonalds and ask for a BK Whopper.
204. Order a pizza and ask them if they can "please put the crust on top this time" in an exasperated voice.
205. Every time someone asks you to do something or says something to you ask "Is that a threat?"
206. When in an elevator, in different voices, shout out random floors, and then watch as you get there, no one gets off. (Lol, I love doing this)
207. Also, when riding up an elevator with a stranger, start singing a song that everyone knows, then expect them to start singing too. If they do not start singing, insist, "Everyone knows that song. Are you stupid?"
208. While walking make car noises loudly (Such as changing gears).
209. Whenever somebody says something, ask what the simplest word they said means. When they explain, ask what the simplest word in their explanation means. Repeat this for the entire conversation.
210. Go up to a someone and say, "Are you annoyed by irrelevant questions?" And then walk away very quickly. (yay for fun things. I love doing this)
211. Finish each sentence with "Monkey See, Monkey Do".
212. Click your mechanical pencils or your pens during a test in school. (I played the surprise symphony doing this. I got extra credit)
213. Pretend you are invisible.
214. Convince people you are deaf and talk in an incredibly phony sign language.
215. Spend all day at a fast food restaurant and see how long it takes before you have to pay for your "free" refills.
216. Continuously open your briefcase or bag and say into it, "Have you got enough air in there?"
217. While going down in an elevator scream, "AAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!! WE'RE GONNA DIE!!" for no apparent reason. (yay!)
218. Call everyone a communist.
219. Explain "the little green men" in detail to someone, and when they don't believe you, accuse them of being one in disguise.
220. Call your neighbors collect.
221. Whenever someone finishes a sentence say, "And then what happened?"
223. Send people annoying chain forwards with outrageous consequences like "If you don't send this to 300 people in 4 seconds you will die instantly" and then insist that it is true and it happened to your uncle.
224. When walking push an invisible cart and make loud squeaky noises.
225. Walk up to random people and ask them, very seriously, "Do you know the muffin man?"
226. Clear your throat every three or four words while speaking.
227. Look at your hand in amazement and say, "Whoa, I never knew I had this!"
228. While driving if you see a "How am I driving" bumper sticker, call the number and inform the operator that the driver is doing a great job.
229. When driving with companions in the car, every few seconds slam on the brakes and insist that a squirrel ran in front of you.
231. Whenever anybody says anything to you. Respond by saying, "I know."
232. Sending this list to all of your friends through email.
233. Continue to ask someone, "Is this annoying? Is this annoying?" over and over and over.
234. Tap someone on the shoulder repeatedly.
235. Begin every sentence with, "By the Gods!"
236. When you're in an argument, no matter what it's about, keep yelling "I don't see your name on it!".
237. When in public, pretend you are selling something in an infomercial.
238. At a restaurant, repeatedly send your food back for changes and after awhile insist that, "This isn't what I ordered!"
239. Go to a shoe store and try on every shoe, then say that you aren't interested in buying shoes and leave.
240. Put powdered sugar in your hair, sit down next to a stranger, and scratch your head a lot.
241. Turn on the Talk Radio Stations in your car, roll down your windows, and headbang.
242. Walk around with a plastic sword and shield and tell strangers "I must avenge the death of my father."
243. Scotch tape your door as an Anti-theft Device.
244. Super Glue quarters to floors. (I did this in school. Nobody knew it was me and I pretended to fall for it)
245. Put the wrong date and year on the papers you hand in to your teachers.
246. Call random numbers and say "Hi, this is Julie from Basken Robins. If you can name 31 flavors in 31 seconds you get a free scoop."
248. Get two cell phones and talk to yourself on them in front of other people.
249. Make a loud and abrupt noise when nobody is looking, then face the other direction when everybody looks your way, pretending the sound came from behind you.
250. lend a book to someone, but staple the middle together.
251) lend someone a book, but rip out the climax.
252) When making a list use the same number twice.
253) Spel easy wordds rong.
253) Pronounce people's names wrong every time you meet them.
254) Delete random numbers from lists of annoying things and see if people notice.
256) After deleting the random numbers from said lists, see if people will go back and check.
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed to stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:
1. Children's Aspirin: Warning: Keep Away From Children
2. Peanuts: Warning: Product May Contain Nuts
3. Curling Iron: Warning: Do not use while sleeping
4. Candle: Warning: Warning, A burning candle is fire
5. Frozen Pizza: Warning: Do not eat before cooking
6. Blanket from Taiwan: Warning: Not To Be Used As Protection From A Tornado
7. Frisbee: Warning: May Contain Small Parts
8. Butcher Knife: Warning: Keep Out of Children
9. Railroad Sign: Warning: Beware! To touch these wires is instant death. Anyone found doing so will be prosecuted.
10. Hair Coloring: Warning: Do not use as an ice cream topping
11. Dial Soap: Warning: Use like regular soap
12. Sleeping Pills: Warning: May Cause Drowsiness
13. Puzzle: Warning: Some Assembly Required
14. Japanese Food Processor: Warning: Not to be used for the other use
15. On a Sears hair-dryer -- Do not use while sleeping.
16. On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
7. On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
18. On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- "Do not turn upside down."
19. On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding -- "Product will be hot after heating."
20. On packaging for a Rowena iron -- "Do not iron clothes on body."
21. On Boot's Children Cough Medicine -- "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."
22. On Nytol Sleep Aid -- "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
23. On most brands of Christmas lights -- "For indoor or outdoor use only."
24. On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the other use."
25. On Sainsbury's peanuts -- "Warning: contains nuts."
26. On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
27. On a child's Superman costume -- "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
28. On a Korean kitchen knife-- "Warning: keep out of children."
29. On a Swedish chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands."
Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity.
Unsafe External Link