Author has written 21 stories for Slam Dunk, Angel Sanctuary, and Harry Potter.
Lanie M writes shounen-ai angst. Her fanfiction is confined primarily to the Slam Dunk fandom, her favoured pairing being Rukawa/Hanamichi, though she has written the occasional Angel Sanctuary, Kira/Katou, as well asHarry Potter, Harry/Draco, fic.
If she is not wholly consumed by writer's block, Lanie M aspires to expand on other pairings, such as Youhei/Hanamichi (Slam Dunk), Rosiel/Katan (Angel Sanctuary), and Cain/Riff (Count Cain). Lanie M does not write R-rated, sexually explicit fics, or smut,but is open to fic requests for other categories, as long as they are within the aforementioned fandoms and a brief storyline can be specified. In fact, fic requests would be welcome, as Lanie M often has trouble conjuring fic plots when she is desperate to write.
Lanie M feels that her style has evolved drastically since she first began writing fanfiction, and she believes this is due to changes in her state of mind and perspective of the world. Though she loves fanfiction, she is uncertain whether she will be able to continue with her contributions. She profoundly hopes she will.
Lanie M was born Melanie Man on May 28 1988 , to a Chinese father and Malaysian mother. Born and raised in Hong Kong as the youngest child of two, Lanie M was often described as a happy, extroverted, and carefree child. With the passing of time, however, Lanie M grew increasingly affected by the frequent bouts of mockery and taunting owing to the nature of her appearance. At the age of 9, in primary five, Lanie M underwent her first eating disorder, eventually placed under the supervision of teachers and family members. She would continue to struggle with weight and eating issues throughout her adolescence, never maintaining a stable weight, and, at the age of 15, developing a case akin to anorexia wherein she suffered from most relevant physical and emotional deteriorations. At the current age of 17, she still grapples with haunting fears and compulsive eating habits.
From the age of 5, Lanie M has had an ardent passion for literature, viewing writing as a tool with which to move people on the deepest level of humanity. Until her aforementioned crisis at 15, Lanie M's dream and ambition was always to become an author, to publish a book which would change the world, inspire the masses, help someone – just one person – and that would make all the difference. Lanie M's desire to evoke emotions from deep within, which can be seen in her preoccupation with literary angst and introspection, can perhaps be traced back to Lanie M's reading of Vladimir Nabokov's 'Lolita', a masterpiece with one of the first excerpts to make Lanie M cry.
"…and I looked and looked at her, and knew as clearly as I know I am to die, that I loved her more than anything I had ever seen or imagined on earth, or hoped for anywhere else. … You may jeer at me, and threaten to clear the court, but until I am gagged and half-throttled, I will shout my poor truth. I insist the world know how much I loved my Lolita, this Lolita, pale and polluted, and big with another’s child, but still gray-eyed, still sooty-lashed, still auburn and almond, still Carmencita, still mine … No matter, even if those eyes of hers would fade to myopic fish, and her nipples swell and crack, and her lovely young velvety delicate delta be tainted and torn – even then I would go mad with tenderness at the mere sight of your dear wan face, at the mere sound of your raucous young voice, my Lolita.”
After a seemingly eternal period of indifference and loss of identity, a period in which Lanie M lost all passion for life, writing, and fanfiction, as a result of endless promptings on behalf of her school to consider her Higher Education, Lanie M realized that the reason behind her love of literature was its ability to pave the way for the revelation of philosophical ideas on the meaning of life, a subject which has fascinated her since the onset of adolescence. Michael Cunningham's‘The Hours' is the most notable example which comes to Lanie M's mind.
“We live our lives, do whatever we do, and then we sleep - it's as simple and ordinary as that. A few jump out of windows or drown themselves or take pills; more die by accident; and most of us, the vast majority, are slowly devoured by some disease or, if we're very fortunate, by time itself. There's just this for consolation: an hour here or there when our lives seem, against all odds and expectations, to burst open and give us everything we've ever imagined, though everyone but children (and perhaps even they) knows these hours will inevitably be followed by others, far darker and more difficult. Still, we cherish the city, the morning; we hope, more than anything, for more.
This realization has shaped the direction of Lanie M's life and has led her to her decision to study Philosophy and Theology in university. Lanie M is firm in her view that all her experiences, her sufferings, and her undying feeling of isolation and loneliness have all happened to serve of the purpose of bringing her close to God. At the age of 11, a bitter and disillusioned atheist, Lanie M underwent an intense religious experience which alerted her to the reality of God’s existence. She felt no drive to commit to religion, however, until the age of 16, when she had a profound conversion experience which dramatically altered her lifestyle. Now, Lanie M has embraced Christianity and is a devout Lutheran, with God as the ultimate priority and purpose of her life. Lanie M's vision is to become a pastor, to touch people and open their eyes to God's blessings and unconditional love, thus offering others in need a place of refuge and peace, just as Jesus has frequently offered her the gift of His salvation, despite her repeated faltering in trials and difficulties of life.
Lanie M's faith and beliefs have been significantly shaped and influenced by the philosophy of Soren Kierkegaard, who claimed that belief in God is a non-rational ‘leap of faith’. In a modernized society where religious belief is on the decline and atheism is prevalent, Lanie M’s mission is to contribute to human progress by prompting the knowledge that faith in God is not simply a matter of rational proofs generated from limited and confined human reason, but instead, arises from God-given religious experience. When reading Kierkegaard's ‘Journals and Papers’, Lanie M feels an incredible and inexplicable sense of resonance, as if someone has verbalized full insight into everything about her own life, and somehow, this makes her feel less alone.
"There is after all an equilibrium in the world. To one God gave the joys, to the other the tears and permission every once in a while to rest in his embrace; and yet the divine reflects itself far more beautifully in the tear-dimmed eye, just as the rainbow is more beautiful than the clear blue sky."
Lanie M has done many things of which she is not proud. She has hurt people, hurt herself, taken life for granted, given up, been ungrateful, been blinded from the things which truly matter. But 17 year old Lanie M knows that despite sporadic times of depression, contemplations of death, and unbearable loneliness, despite her somewhat dysfunctional relationship with her mother and conflicts with family members, that life is a gift, that faith, hope, and love are the three things which she cannot give up on, the only three things really worth fighting for.
Lanie M still has a long way to gobefore she will achievefreedom and peace. But she knows that there is always hope because every step she takes is a step closer to Heaven.
“And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes;
Unsafe External Link