Dragonman0007
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Joined 10-23-10, id: 2586663, Profile Updated: 09-09-19
Author has written 2 stories for Misc. Books, and Fullmetal Alchemist.

Hi! My name is Dragonmanvirus0007.

Letting you know, I AM a bit cra-... ok, let's get rid of the a bit. I AM crazy. I know it, so no need to call the mental hospital and tell them that one of their patients has escaped again.

Mental Hospital Doctor: THERE HE IS!!! GET HIM!!!!! (runs with syringes and straitjackets)

Oh, crap. Here come the asylum peeps.

Doctors: IT'S A MENTAL HOSPITAL!!! FOR CURING PEOPLE LIKE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!

...wow. Thanks, I think.

Doctors: YOU'RE WELCOME!


Hey, Dragonmanvirus0007 here. Just to let you know, I will not take anyone's characters. But if you want me to put your character in my story, post a review with who your character is and his/her/its personality, and I will have it be in there for a cameo, maybe a chapter or two. If you want your character in again, follow the instructions above.

Elem (in progress): Fullmetal Alchemist; AUOOCOC(s?)- What happens when the Fullmetal characters find another skilled Alchemy kid? Set years after the first season.


http:///personality.htm


I took a villain test (search "villain test" on Google and click first one), and here is what I got:

Your results:

You are Venom
Strength, disguise and adrenaline are your greatest weapons.

Venom
53%

Dr. Doom
51%

Mystique
50%

The Joker
50%

Dark Phoenix
43%

Mr. Freeze
43%

Riddler
40%

Juggernaut
38%

Lex Luthor
37%

Apocalypse
37%

Kingpin
35%

Two-Face
34%

Green Goblin
30%

Magneto
29%

Poison Ivy
29%

Catwoman
29%


Click here to take the Super Villain Personality Test


I took a superhero quiz and this is what I got:

Your results:

You are Spider-Man
You are intelligent, witty, a bit geeky and have great power and responsibility.

Spider-Man
80%

Robin
60%

Superman
60%

Hulk
45%

The Flash
45%

Catwoman
45%

Iron Man
45%

Supergirl
43%

Batman
40%

Green Lantern
35%

Wonder Woman
33%


Click here to take the Superhero Personality Test


"It seems so frightening
Time passes by like lightning
Before you know it you're struck down"

Green Day - Android (Kerplunk)


You know you live in the age of technology when...

1.) You accidentally enter your password on a microwave.

2.) You haven't played solitare with real cards for years

3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they don't have a screenname or facebook

4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the TV

6.) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job.

7.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling.

8.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.

9.) And you were too busy to notice number 5.

10.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5.

11.) Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly.

12.) Put this in your profile if you fell for that, and you know you did


"I have 99 problems, and a botch is 1." -Blaine Capatch (Nerd Poker, Episode 56)


If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever run into a door, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

Ninety-eight percent of teenagers have tried smoking pot. If you're one of the two percent who hasn't, copy this and paste it in your profile.

First of all, here is my definition of writer's block: Writer's Block- n. 1. A mental barrier in the writer's mind that prevents the flow of new ideas to the brain. 2. A writer's worst nightmare and the bane of their existence. If you have experienced writer's block, know the pain of writer's block, and agree with me, then post this onto your profile immediately. If you haven't experienced writer's block yet, you undoubtedly will so post this onto your profile anyway.

If you are crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, or anything else that applies, copy and paste this to your profile. (I thought it said apples for a second there!)

A large percent of authors do not know the difference between 'your' and 'you're'. If you do know the difference, copy and paste this to your profile

Along with not knowing the difference between 'your' and 'you're', some people don't know how to properly use 'their', 'there', and 'they're'. If you do know when to use these three words than paste this onto your profile and remember to thank your grammar teacher.

Too many people are on crack. If you're not, then add this to your bio

Too many people have smoked marijuana. If you haven't, write this to your profile

If you've ever busted a move/burst into song, copy and paste this into your profile

Weird is good. Strange is bad. Odd is what you call someone who you can't decide what to call them. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, which means weird is good! If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile!

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile. (I've done this...)

If you don't watch Laguna Beach or the O.C. or The Hills religiously, never have, never will, and are proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile. (What are these?)

95 of teenagers would panic if the Jonas brothers were about to jump off a 100 foot building. Copy and paste this if you were the other 5 that would bring popcorn and invite friends

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile

If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile

If you are obsessed with fanfiction, copy this into your profile

If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile

If you think that the kids should stop chasing Lucky and leave the leprechaun alone, then copy and paste this into your profile. (If you want Lucky Charms so bad, and have the energy to go out and chase that leprechaun, then haul your butts out to the store and buy a box!)

If you have siblings that drive you crazy then copy this onto your profile. (amplified, seeing as I have 1)

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile. (Use plural for me.)

I'm an animé watcher/a manga reader, and I'm proud of it. If you are, copy and paste this line into your profile.

93 of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If your part of the 7 that would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy and paste this into your profile and add your name to the list: Sunlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Moonlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Evil Genius of the COCA, Invader Miley Phantom, dAnnYsGiRl777, BloodySalvation, Lady Lost-A-Lot, bellabookworm9, Bella Masen Cullen, Vampire Scooby, Deidara's Manialoll 4 Ever, Edward's One True Love, ANBU Inu, oceaneyes85253, MaybelleDragon-chan, TheEmoSideOfMe, ChristinaAngel, EdwardlovesChristyalways, Shoelacey, KlutzyBurnette, CrazyHorseNinja, xxIxAMxTHExPIExx, Mamoru4ever, SilentWhiteRose, Velgamidragon, Hikari Kame, ottawawolf, Dragonmanvirus0007

If you're hyper, like being hyper, and are hyper all the time, COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!

If you hear voices in your head, copy and paste this onto your profile! (I reply to them, too)(... is it safe to have multiple voices?)

If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever felt the undeniable urge to slam your head into something, whether it is another person or not copy this into your profile (I have, too)

If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile (see comment just above)

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile (great way to stop an argument or to move away gracefully (like a DDR n00b) from an awkward topic)

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vice versa copy this into your profile

I want child abuse to stop, and if you do, too, copy and paste this onto your profile.

I have dreams about being in an animé/a manga, and I'm proud of it. If you are, copy and paste this line into your profile.

If you have ever attempted to mimic Artemis's vampire smile, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever tried to bury an acorn at the full moon, or thought about it, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever yelled at an inanimate object for not listening to you, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you know the difference between a one-handed and a two-handed sword, copy and paste this into your profile.

My best friend is insane. If you have an insane friend, copy this into your profile! (does self count?)

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you are aware that so many people nowadays pretend to be someone they're not, copy this on your profile.

If you know someone who deserves punishment but you are to nice to do that to anyone even if they do deserve it, copy and past this to your profile.

Research shows that 92 of today's population have moved on to rap. If you are one of the 8 that stayed with rock, metal, pop, country, or alternative, copy and paste this onto your profile! (Some of my favorite bands do rap, but it is better than the generic crap that is out there)

SPLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! If you are really random copy and paste this to your profile.

I have a GIANT I mean GIANT GIANT GIANT imagination, and I'm proud of it. If you are, copy and paste this line into your profile. (like I said before, I have multiple personal worlds.)

If you know you can fly, no matter what the laws of physics state, copy and paste this to your profile then add your name to the list: Wind Crystal, ChrisGrey, MewMewFerret, MewBleuberri, ANProductions, ANMProductions, CrazyHorseNinja, Velgamidragon, Hikari Kame, ottawawolf, Dragonmanvirus0007

If you are anti-social sometimes copy this into your profile.

If you love rain, copy and paste this into your profile. (helps me sleep)

If you hug cute toys when no one's looking, paste this to your profile and add your name. AlukaKaiserin (i love my fox...).Uya Comaru (Bunnie and Wolfy are my loves). Velgamidragon (Eee, Snowy!). HikariKame I have an obscene load of plushies..., ottawawolf (Simba! huggles), Dragonmanvirus0007 (Chops! spweeeeee!!!)

If you think aliens are really out there, and the only reason they haven't contacted us is because they think we're stupid (we are!), copy and paste this into your profile.

If you and your friends have a nickname, title, or anything else for each other, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile.

Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile.

If you like smiley faces, then copy this into your profile :D ;3 XD :-D

If you think that the supernatural is real, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think that it is possibly to transfer one's body into a video game/anime/movie/TV show/cartoon, copy and paste this onto your profile.

PLEASE READ WHAT'S UNDER THIS!

I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.

I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.

I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.

We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.

I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.

I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me.

I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again.

I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear.

We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.

I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.

I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.

I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.

I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.

I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.

I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.

I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.

I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I did not have to always deal with society hating me.

I am the person who is afraid of telling his loving Christian parents he loves another male.

I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.

I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love.

Re-post this if you believe homophobia is wrong. Please do your part to end it!


A teenage girl about 17 named Diane had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away. As she walked along under the tall elm trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely.

The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her." Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 98 of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93 of the people that read this won't repost it?

Repost this if you truly believe in God, or a god.

PS: God/a god is always there in your heart and loves you no matter what,
and if you stand up 4 him he will stand up for you.


Wisdom of Life - Quotable Quotes.

According to the latest figures, 43 percent of all statistics are utterly worthless.
Don't steal. The government hates the competition.
If at first you don't succeed, change the rules.
Tell the truth and run.
Smile! It makes them wonder what you're up to.
Friends come, and friends go, but enemies accumulate.
Truth is stranger than fiction, because fiction has to make sense.
Power corrupts. Absolute power is kind of neat.
Generally, generalizations are wrong.
Ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make ye mad.
All things considered, insanity may be the only reasonable alternative.
If we knew what we were doing, it wouldn't be research.
Life is like a box of chocolates - it's full of nuts.
The Truth is out there. So what are you doing here?
If you can't beat them, join them. Then take over.
Whatever you are, be a good one.
You cannot shake hands with a clenched fist.
You can never underestimate the stupidity of the general public.
We are the people our parents warned us about.
Freedom is the right to be wrong, not the right to do wrong.
The difficulty is not so great as to die for a friend, as to find a friend worth dying for.
Belief gets in the way of learning.
If you try to fail and succeed, what have you done?
When angry, count to four. When very angry, swear.
Enjoy every minute of life. There's plenty of time to be dead.
And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count, it's the life in your years.
We don't live in the world of reality, we live in the world of how we percieve reality.
If God had intended Man to smoke, he would have set him on fire.
A single death is a tragedy. A million deaths is a statistic.
Have the courage to live. Anyone can die.
Education is important. School, however, is another matter.
When a finger points at the moon, the imbecile looks at the finger.
Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to change it every 2 months.
Cynics are made, not born.
Maybe this world is another planet's hell.

20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

1. At Lunch Time , Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.

4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label it " In".

5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.

6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks , Write "For Smuggling Diamonds".

7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy".

8. Don't use any punctuation.

9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.

10. Order a Diet Water when ever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go".

12. Sing Along At The Opera.

13. Go To A Poetry Recital. And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme?

14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and Play tropical Sounds All Day.

15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In the Mood.

16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.

17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won! I Won!"

18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!"

19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."

20. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity .


Those that fit me are in bold.

I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz.
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell. (They should be scared.)
I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell. (I'm a gay rights supporter. Points up)
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so i MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
(Never taken a sip.)
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore...
I'm a DANCER, So i must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo. (So? What’s wrong with that?)
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals.
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual. (Nope.)
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all. (Like. Hell.)
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player. (Again: Like. Hell.)
I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser. (Wuzza “poser”?)
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and that's how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so i must be GAY TOO.
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited.
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy.
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas.
I'm a STONER so i MUST be going in the wrong direction.
I'm a VIRGIN so i MUST be prude. (I just haven’t found the right person.)
I'm STRAIGHT EDGE so i must be violent. (What’s a straight edge?)
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.. or crazy.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so i MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly. (Points up)
I'm a SKATER so i must do weed and steal stuff.
I'm a PUNK so i must only wear black and date only other punks.
I'm ASIAN so i must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7.
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals. (Not on your life. Especially when a friend of mine is Bi.)
I'm MIXED so i must be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM so i MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so i MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA.
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect.
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black. (Holla! XD)
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil.
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser. (Only when I feel like it.)
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive. (Only somewhat…)
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon.
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot. (Most of the ppl I know are my friends.)
I'm ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party. (Party, yes. Drinking, ONLY sodas.)
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone. (? Why does everyone have to do this? If you support, support for your own reasons.)
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't. (Only when it comes to the computer or drawing. I'm jealous of my friends who can write.)
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy. (Oh yeah!)
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills. (Not my fault! I wash it every day!!!)
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
(Defensive of my friends.)
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser. (Hey! They’re good!)
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE.. So I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse.
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I Must be homosexual.
I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak. (Try. Will still try.)
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak.
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant. (Eff no.)
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep.
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend. (Marriage before that.)
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth. (I have no problem with sexuality, and I don't want to castrate every man on earth...)
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE. (Blood is needed for me. It’s needed for everyone!)
I'm ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future. (I'm a teenager. What can I do?)
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE.
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser. (Just trying to get thru.)
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy.
(No, I'm not a hippy. I just hate pollution.)
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue. (Pluses & minuses are needed for a TRUE fan character. Mary-Sues have no kryptonites.)
I CHAT, I MUST be having cyber sex.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan.
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion.
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE. (I'm a teenager, duh!)
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER. (I can put myself into the world of the book, if it’s written good enough. Try Terry Pratchett.)
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED. (So what? I don’t care.)
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST. (WHAT? The government just needs to get their frickin’ BUTTS in GEAR!!!)
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY. (I just respect other people.)
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED. (No. I don't need to be labeled.)
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast.
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish (I'm not childish. At least not always. That's it.)
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid. (I like math. So there.)
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroos.
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have no clue. (I got a lot of clues. And I am a teenager.)
I am QUIET and POLITE, so I MUST be a pushover. (Me? Pushover? What?)
I use GOOD GRAMMAR, so I MUST be a snob.
I prefer FANTASY and SCI-FI, so I MUST be out of touch with reality. (I know reality. I just reject yours and substitute my own.)
I love TO LEARN so I MUST be boring.
(Any of my friends can tell you otherwise.)
I'm WHITE, so I MUST be a racist. (I H-A-T-E racists.)
I'm a GUY with LONG HAIR, so I MUST be a hippie/druggie.
I'm good with COMPUTERS, so I MUST be a nerd/geek. (I just like learning.)
I'm a GUY, so I MUST love sports. (Meh. They're ok...)
I'm NOT RELIGIOUS so I MUST be treated like crap until I pray to your god.
I am a GIRL, so boys MUST be better than me at sports.
I am a PUSHOVER, so I MUST have controlling friends
I am a GIRL, so I MUST only be good at housework.
I am not EMO, so I MUST be uncool. (Never was, never will be.)
I am WHITE and I like to DANCE, so I MUST be lame.
(I suck at dancing, but it’s fun.)
I don't act DEPRESSED, so I MUST be weird.
I am SKINNY, so I MUST be sensitive about my weight.
I am a CHRISTIAN/CATHOLIC/ANGLICAN/PROTESTANT, so I MUST go to church every Sunday. (Why? Do I have to? ‘Cause I don’t.)
I am a CHRISTIAN/CATHOLIC/ANGLICAN/PROTESTANT, so I MUST not do anything on Halloween. (Feh! Halloween is my second favorite holiday! FREE CANDY!!)
I am POOR, so I MUST not have good hygiene.
I am a HOUSEWIFE, so I MUST have no self respect.
I consider myself 'NORMAL', so I MUST be boring.

Copy and paste this into your profile if you think stereotypes are wrong.


Send This In An E-mail To Someone To Make Them Smile!

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr/Mrs.
REAL FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD/MOM.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong.
REAL FRIENDS: Will sit next to you saying “Damn … we fucked up … but that shit was fun!”

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.
REAL FRIENDS: Won't tell anyone else you cry... just laugh about it when you're not down anymore.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Try to half-ass comfort you when you feel down.
REAL FRIENDS: Grab you by the shoulders, shake you, and say "Bitch, snap out of it!"

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.
REAL FRIENDS: Keep your shit so long they forget its yours.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Always keep your stuff they borrowed in perfect condition.
REAL FRIENDS: Lose your shit and tell you, "My bad ... here's a tissue."

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink because they think it's polite.
REAL FRIENDS: Raise an eyebrow and say "Bitch, I'll eat what I want" and are the reason you never have food.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Know a few things about you.
REAL FRIENDS: Can write a very embarrassing book about you, with direct quotes from you.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
REAL FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will knock on your front door.
REAL FRIENDS: Walk right in and say “I’M HOME!”

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Ask you what you number is.
REAL FRIENDS: Remind you what you number is when you forget.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Are for awhile.
REAL FRIENDS: Are for life.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Have to be reminded not to tell.
REAL FRIENDS: Would willingly go skinny-dipping in a tank of acid before they even consider telling.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will take your drink away when they think you’ve had enough.
REAL FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say “Bitch, drink the rest of that, you know we don’t waste.”

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will offer to pay when you have a drink.
REAL FRIENDS: Will laugh and say "Pay my ass! You'll pay for mine, bitch!"

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Don't let friends drive drunk.
REAL FRIENDS: Don't let friends drive drunk alone.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will apologize when you forget lunch money and say that they don't have any left.
REAL FRIENDS: Will say "Sucks for you" and finally cave after a few hours and then say "You owe me for this, you fatass."

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will smile and say "Don't worry about me" when they forget their lunch money, even if you didn't offer to pay.
REAL FRIENDS: Will say "Bitch, I'm a fatass and I'm starving, now buy me some damn food."

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will automatically tell you you're beautiful when you ask if something makes you look fat.
REAL FRIENDS: Will say "Well no shit, sherlock."

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Would tell you not to get a face-lift because you already look perfect.
REAL FRIENDS: Would say "Face-lift? I don't think a fork-lift would help."

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Tell you your zits aren't noticeable.
REAL FRIENDS: Say "Damn, girl! That thing is HUGE!!"

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Laugh with you.
REAL FRIENDS: Laugh at you.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Congratulate you when you get good grades.
REAL FRIENDS: Say "Jeez, you nerd. If you were in stupid classes like me, we'd see each other more."

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Encourage you not to skip school.
REAL FRIENDS: Photoshop one of their old doctor's notes and use it to spring you from school.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will talk shit to the person who talks shit about you.
REAL FRIENDS: Will knock them the fuck out!

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Say they are too busy to listen to your problems, but when it comes to them they expect you to have all the time in the world.
REAL FRIENDS: Not only kick everything out of their schedule to listen to what's wrong, but help come up with vindictive plans to make you feel a whole lot better!

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Say sorry when you want to talk to them at odd hours of the night, or even just hang out at odd hours.
REAL FRIENDS: Come right over and hang out with you, until you either fall asleep, or kick them out.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will glare at the guy who dumps you and say "Forget him. You're too good for him."
REAL FRIENDS: Kick the guy's ass and threaten to castrate him with a spork if he comes within five miles of you.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Crush on your older brother whom you absolutely despise.
REAL FRIENDS: Hate you older brother as much as you do and give him the nick-name "Faggot".

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will ignore this.
REAL FRIENDS: Will repost it.

FRIENDS: Will help me find my way when I'm lost
BEST FRIENDS: Will be the one messing with my compass, stealing my map and giving me bad directions

FRIENDS: Will help me learn to drive
BEST FRIENDS: Will help me roll the car into the lake so I can collect insurance

FRIENDS: Will watch my pets when I go away
BEST FRIENDS: Won't let me go away

FRIENDS: Will help me up when I fall down
BEST FRIENDS: Will point and laugh because she tripped me

FRIENDS: Will go to a concert with me
BEST FRIENDS: Will kidnap the band with me

FRIENDS: Ask me for my number
BEST FRIENDS: Ask me for her number

FRIENDS: Hide me from the cops
BEST FRIENDS: are probably the reason they're after me in the first place

FRIENDS: let me make an idiot of myself in public
BEST FRIENDS: are up there with me making an idiot out of themselves too.

FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.
BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.

FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.
BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.
BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you sayin "DAMN! We messed up!"
OR, "LET'S DO IT AGAIN NEXT WEEK!"

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.
BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore.

FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.
BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.
BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.
BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME!"

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.
BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.

FRIENDS: Are only through highschool/college. (aka: drinking buddies)
BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.

FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough.
BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say "Dude drink the rest of that ! You know we don't waste!

A friend is the best weapon you can have in a battlefield.

Friends will always be like "well you deserve better" but best friends will be prank calling him saying "you will die in seven days."

FRIENDS: Would ignore this letter
BEST FRIENDS: Will repost this shit!

I OWE MY MOTHER

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE. "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION. "You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL. "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC. " Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC. "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT. "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY. "Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS. "Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM. "Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER. "This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY. "If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE. "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION. "Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY. " There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16 My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION. "Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING. "You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE. "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP. "Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR. "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me. "

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT. "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS. "You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS. "Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM. "When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE. "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you".

When life gives me lemons, I make orange juice and leave the world to wonder how the heck I managed it

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving isn't for you

If all else fails, destroy all evidence that you tried.

I don't suffer from insanity - I enjoy every minute of it

Two wrongs don't make a right, but they make a good excuse

Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door

The person who smiles when things go wrong has found someone to blame it on

Better to stay silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt

Never argue with an idiot. They'll just drag you down to their level and beat you with experience

I'd tell you to go to hell, but I work there and really don't want to see you everyday

Someday, we'll look on this, laugh nervously and change the subject

I wondered why the frisbee was getting bigger, then it hit me

Normal people scare me...but not as much as I scare them

Even if the voices aren't real, they have some good ideas

If I had any dignity that would have been humiliating.

Sanity? I never had such a useless thing to begin with!

That which does not kill me had better run pretty dang fast.

Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back

Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.

A wise man once said, "Ask a girl."

When in doubt, push random buttons!

Fighting is mind over matter. I don't mind, and you don't matter

When you talk to God, that's religion. When God talks to you, that's psychotic.

There's always a light at the end of the tunnel. Of course, it's usually an oncoming express train.

Last night I was looking up at the stars when suddenly I wondered..."Dude, where the heck's my ceiling?"

There are three kinds of people. Those who learn by reading, a few who learn by observation, and the rest who have to test the electric fence for themselves.

They say guns don't kill people; people do. Well, I think guns help. I mean, if you just stood there and yelled 'BANG!' I don't think you'd kill many people...

Just when I think you've said the stupidest thing ever you just keep on talking

You know, you do this annoying thing where you open your mouth and then these things you call words come out. Yeah like that. Stop it

He who laughs last thinks slowest

An idiot is a 44th floor window washer who steps back to admire his work

I'm not cynical, everything just sucks

I respect your opinion, I just think it's stupid

It's not denial. I’m just selective about the reality I accept.

They say hard work never hurts anybody, but why take the chance.

Why be difficult, when with just a little bit of effort, you can be impossible?

Ask me no questions and I’ll tell you no lies

Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film.

A clear conscience is usually a sign of memory loss.

There are no stupid questions, just a lot of inquisitive idiots.

The secret to success is sincerity. Once you can fake that you’re good

I'm not as dumb as you look

The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then tells you why it's not.

We live in an age where pizza gets to your house before the police

If you don't like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk.

Sarcasm is one more service we offer.

Hate is just a special kind of love we give to people who suck.

I used to have super powers, but then my therapist took them away.

They say the truth will set you free. Then why is it every time I tell the truth, I get sent to my room?

Some people are like slinkies. They seem to have no purpose, but they still bring you a smile when you push them down the stairs.

Keep smiling; it makes people wonder what you're up to

Love your enemies. It gets them really confused.

Always take the time to smell the roses...and sooner or later you'll inhale a bee.

If a motorist cuts you off, just turn the other cheek...nothing gets the message across like a good mooning.

If genius is 1 inspiration and 99 perspiration, I must be sharing elevators with a lot of bright people.

It's always darkest before dawn...so if you're gonna steal the neighbors newspaper, that's the tme to do it.

It takes fewer muscles to smile than to frown...and fewer still to ignore someone completely.

Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked up into jet engines.

I believe no problem is so large or so difficult that it can't be blamed on someone else.

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

My father always said laughter is the best medicine, which I guess is why several of us ended up dying of tuberculosis.

It takes a big man to cry...but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man.

When I'm feeling down I like to whistle...it makes my neighbor's dog run to the end of his chain and gag himself.

Doors are on a house so you don't have to go through the windows.

If you can't get the skeletons out of your closet, you'd better teach them to dance.

Stupid is just a 5 letter word.

Don't ask me to think inside my head, because I lost my inside voice.

Friends are like condoms, they protect each other when things get hard.

No one ever says "it's only a game" if their team is winning.

Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.

If UFO's are supposed to be so intelligent, then why have they abducted humans?

Anyone who says "As easy as taking candy from a baby" has never tried it.

If voting could change anything, it would be illegal.

That that is, is. That that is not, is not. That that is is not that that is not, and that that is not is not that that is.

If you got a problem, cry a river, build a bridge, and get over it.

I never repeat myself, so pay close attention to me the first time, cause I never repeat myself.

Work is blackmail for survival.

Don't look a gift horse in the mouth without first giving him a Certs.

Canaries are the best, especially with ketchup on them.

Slow and steady gets you trampled by the other guys.

When opportunity knocks, shoot first and ask questions later.

Fun flies when you're doing time.

When all else fails, use duct tape.

Isn't making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing section in a swimming pool?

If the Jacksonville Jaguars are known as the "Jags" and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers are known as the "Bucs", what does that make the Tennessee Titans?

Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injection?

I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow, isn't looking good either.

I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by.

Am I getting smart with you? How would you know?

I'd explain it to you, but your brain would explode.

Someday we'll look back on all this and plow into a parked car.

There are very few personal problems that cannot be solved through a suitable application of high explosives.

Tell me what you need, and I'll tell you how to get along without it.

Accept that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue.

Needing someone is like needing a parachute. If he isn't there the first time you need him, chances are you won't be needing him again.

I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.

Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, "Where the heck is the ceiling?!"

My Reality Check bounced.

On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the escape key.

I don't suffer from stress. I'm a carrier.

You're slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter.

Everybody is somebody else's weirdo.

I'm not a complete idiot. Some parts are missing

These are actually on the labels.

On Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
(Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)

On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special!)

On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
(and that would be how?)

On some Swann frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
(But it's 'just' a suggestion!)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
Do not turn upside down.
(Too late! you lose!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
(Are you sure? Let's experiment.)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
((But wouldn't that save more time?)Whose body?)

On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.
(We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)

On Nytol sleep aid:
Warning: may cause drowsiness.
(One would hope!)

On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: keep out of children.
(hmm..something must have gotten lost in the translation..)

On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
(As opposed to use in outer space?)

On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
(Now I'm curious.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: contains nuts.
(but no peas?)

On artificial bacon:
"Real artificial bacon bits".
(we don't get fake fake bacon. we get real fake bacon.)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
(somebody got paid big bucks to write this one..)

On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
(Raise your hand if you've tried this.)

On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
(Oh go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief.)

On an American Flag: Made in China

At Funplex: Paintless Paintball (So it's...ball?)

Next to a kid's place: Adult Movies

In a Parking Lot: Do not park in the parking lot. (That's okay, the streets are empty.)


A black man walks into a cafe one early morning and noticed that he was the only black man there. As he sat down, he noticed a white man behind him.

The white man said, "colored people are not allowed here."

The black man turned around and stood up. He then said:

"When I was born I was black,"

"When I grew up I was black,"

"When I'm sick I'm black,"

"When I go in the sun I'm black,"

"When I'm cold I'm black,"

"When I die I'll be black."

"But you sir..."

"When you're born you're pink,"

"When you grow up you're white,"

"When you're sick, you're green,"

"When you go in the sun you turn red,"

"When you're cold you turn blue,"

"And when you die you turn purple."

"And yet you have the nerve to call me colored"

The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...

Copy this onto your site and help stop racism


Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?

Boy: No.

Girl: Do you like me?

Boy: No.

Girl: Do you want me?

Boy: No.

Girl: Would you cry if I left?

Boy: No.

Girl: Would you live for me?

Boy: No.

Girl: Would you do anything for me?

Boy: No.

Girl: Choose -- Me or your life.

Boy: My life.

The girl runs away in shock and pain and the boy runs after her and says:

"The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind"

"The reason why I don't like you is because I love you"

"The reason why I don't want you is because I need you"

"The reason why I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left"

"The reason why I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you"

"The reason why I'm not willing to do anything for you is because I would do everything for you"

"The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life"


Translations: Japan - English (((not by me!)))

Jobun = Foreword
Shô = Chapter

Ichi = One
Ni = Two
San = Three
Shi / Yon = Four
Go = Five
Roku = Six
Shichi / Nana = Seven
Hachi = Eight
Kyuu = Nine
Juu = Ten
JuuIchi = Eleven
JuuNi = Twelve
JuuSan = Thirteen
JuuShi = Fourteen
JuuGo = Fifteen
JuuRoku = Sixteen
JuuShichi = Seventeen
JuuHachi = Eighteen
JuuKyuu = Nineteen
NiJuu = Twenty

Haru = Spring
Natsu = Summer
Aki = Fall
Fuyu = Winter

Sayonara = Goodbye
Ohayo gozaimasu = Good morning
Konnichi wa = Good afternoon
Konban wa = Good everning
Oyasumi nasai = Good night
Merii kurisumasu = Happy Christmas
Akemashite omedeto gozaimasu = Happy New Year

Moshi moshi? = Hello? ("Moshi moshi?", is something they say everytime they answer the phone)

Oh dear Kami-sama = Oh dear Lord / Oh dear God
Oh Kami = Oh God

Nakama = It can mean friend, but has a much stronger meaning to it like: Super-duper-bestest-friend-in-the-whole-wide-world-where-nothing-can-ever-ever-ever-EVER-tear-us-apart...

Koibito / Amate = Lover

Anata = means 'you' but also can mean 'dear'

Koi = Love

Koishii = Dearest / Sweetheart

Ichizoku = Family or Clan, ex. The Uchiha Ichizoku (The Uchiha Clan)

Otou-sama, Otou-san, Otou-chan, Tou-sama, Tou-san, Tou-chan, Chichioya (Chichiue),'Oyaji' = Father, dad, 'Old man'

Okaa-sama, Okaa-san, Okaa-chan, Kaa-sama, Kaa-san, Kaa-chan, Hahaoya (Hahaue) = Mother, mom

Onii-sama, Onii-san, Onii-chan, Nii-sama, Nii-san, Nii-chan, Aniki, Ani, (Name, ex. Naruto)-nii = Older brother, Big brother, (Ani) brother equally, big brother (Naruto)

Onee-sama, Onee-san, Onee-chan, Nee-sama, Nee-san, Nee-chan, (Name, ex. Sakura)-nee = Older sister, Big sister, big sister (Sakura)

Otouto-sama, Otouto-san, Otouto-kun, Otouto-chan, Otouto, (Name, ex. Sasuke)-otouto = Younger brother, little brother, baby brother, little brother (Sasuke)

Imouto-sama, Imouto-san, Imouto-chan, Imouto, (Name, ex. Hanabi)-imouto = Younger sister, little sister, baby sister, little sister (Hanabi)

Ojii-sama, Ojii-san, Ojii-chan, Jii-sama, Jii-san, Jii-chan, 'Oyaji' = Grandfather, 'Old man'

Obaa-sama, Obaa-san, Obaa-chan, Baa-sama, Baa-san, Baa-chan, Sobo = Grandmother, Granny, 'Old hag'

Oji-sama, Oji-san, Oji-chan, Ji-sama, Ji-san, Ji-chan = Uncle

Itoko-sama, Itoko-san, Itoko-kun, Itoko-chan = Cousin

Ossan = Old man / Mister

Onna = Woman

Gaki = Brat

-sama = For higher status, ex. Hokage, Clan Head, ex. Tsunade-sama, Hiashi-sama

-san = For people you respect, ex. Kakashi-san, or with surname only: Hatake-san

-kun = For a boy / man you are familiar with, ex. Sasuke-kun

-chan = For a girl woman you are familiar with, also refered to cute, ex. Sakura-chan

-sensei = For a teacher, doctor, ex. Iruka-sensei, Tsunade-sensei

-taichou = For a captain, ex. Hatake-taichou (Captain Hatake)

-shishou = For boss or a teacher in a job, ex. Tsunade-shishou (By Sakura)

-senpai = For a senior in school or in a job, ex. Neji-senpai, Deidara-sempai

-kouhai (Sp?) = For a junior in school or in a job, ex. Naruto-kouhai

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Golden Quiche by Sophtopus reviews
For Monsterkind, the Surface represented freedom. For Frisk, it's a return to some uncomfortable realities. It all began with a simple wish. When that wish faded, Frisk tried to move on. Except, 'moving on' was not so simple. Emerging from the Underground had put them in a worldwide spotlight. From an unknown child, they had become an icon of great value.
Undertale - Rated: T - English - Mystery/Drama - Chapters: 221 - Words: 858,346 - Reviews: 368 - Favs: 401 - Follows: 373 - Updated: 11/15 - Published: 6/17/2016 - Frisk, OC, Papyrus, Sans
The Undesired Second Chance by poplasia reviews
Axel Brandt is a highly intelligent but overall normal guy. He lives a normal life, has a normal engineering job, has normal friends, so on and so forth. But then he died… or not. Displaced and still very much alive, now he's found himself in a distinctly abnormal situation. Ninja are not something he wants to deal with.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Humor - Chapters: 43 - Words: 151,428 - Reviews: 880 - Favs: 2,196 - Follows: 2,759 - Updated: 11/1 - Published: 5/15/2017 - Minato N., Kushina U., OC
Hopes, Dreams, and DETERMINATION by Dragonsrule18 reviews
Frisk grew up in a home with neglectful, drug using parents. With a little sister to take care of, she takes a job getting a rare flower specimen from Mt. Ebott, only to fall into the Underground. With the help of a mysterious ghost girl named Chara only she can see and hear, she tries to get home to her sister, facing danger, but also making new friends along the way. Good!Chara.
Undertale - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Adventure - Chapters: 26 - Words: 262,974 - Reviews: 218 - Favs: 193 - Follows: 184 - Updated: 6/23 - Published: 6/1/2017 - [Chara, Sans] [Frisk, Papyrus] - Complete
Relics of the Past by Cyrro reviews
One day after a mission Iruka decides to take in Naruto Uzumaki. What could possibly go wrong? Well... it looks like Naruto just turned off his personal gravity. Oh, and Shisui is prone to sugar highs. Who would've guessed?
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Family/Humor - Chapters: 310 - Words: 519,100 - Reviews: 1902 - Favs: 1,125 - Follows: 1,159 - Updated: 11/30/2020 - Published: 1/24/2017 - Naruto U., Iruka U. - Complete
Not Everything Is As It Seems by Daniel Terres reviews
Daniel Terres simply wanted a job, not this big mess of chaos he got pulled into. Mysteries, ghosts, haunted pizzerias. And what's this about those robots knowing him? "I never signed up for this!"
Five Nights at Freddy´s - Rated: T - English - Humor/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 55 - Words: 74,576 - Reviews: 64 - Favs: 44 - Follows: 36 - Updated: 5/17/2019 - Published: 7/5/2018 - OC, The Puppet, The Murderer/William Afton, Michael Afton - Complete
Mystery Girl by SoftestPuffss reviews
"I've noticed her since I first began my college days. And for two whole years, that's all I could say about her. Graduation was just around the corner, and my curiosities were sky high. Who is she? Why is she watching me? Why is she stalking me? What did she want? I wanted answers. And I will have them before I graduate." [M for rough Quilava on Smeargle lovemaking. Male/Female]
Pokémon - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,929 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 7 - Published: 2/12/2019 - Quilava/Magmarashi, Smeargle/Doble - Complete
Piece By Piece by AnimationNut reviews
Platonic Soulmate AU. Grif spent most of his life with only one soulmark. In a world where one soulmark is shameful, he faced years of bullying. He eventually gave up any lingering hope of finding the rest of his soulmates. He had his sister. That was more than enough. After all, what were the odds he would find his soulmates in the army?
Red vs. Blue - Rated: T - English - Family/Friendship - Chapters: 12 - Words: 29,206 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 12/6/2018 - Published: 10/21/2018 - F. Donut, D. Grif, Sarge, D. Simmons - Complete
Adopted Promise! by Mozart's Fantasy reviews
Sans thought he'd lost one of the people he cared about most when Frisk gave her own life to stop Chara. As he sat there, rocking the child's still form, he made a promise... one that he'd do anything to keep. Then, a tiny skeleton baby with wispy, brown hair gives him the chance to make things right and Sans comes to learn the joys and pains of being a father to his little girl.
Undertale - Rated: T - English - Family/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 37 - Words: 182,926 - Reviews: 363 - Favs: 474 - Follows: 433 - Updated: 8/3/2018 - Published: 3/30/2016 - Frisk, Papyrus, Sans - Complete
Outertale by Youwillneverseeme reviews
After the barrier was destroyed, everyone thought it was over, but nobody counted on there being another monster realm. The Emperor of the Outerworld – the fabled empire in the sky – abducts Frisk in order to use their soul to unlock an ancient power, one that could mean the world's demise. Join Frisk and company's second journey, filled with excitement, danger… and an old friend.
Undertale - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 42 - Words: 303,991 - Reviews: 283 - Favs: 292 - Follows: 266 - Updated: 7/9/2018 - Published: 7/15/2016 - Complete
Mike Messed Up by Blame The Editor reviews
Mike was just another night guard waiting to be killed by the end of the week. No more, no less. The thing is, how exactly are you supposed to react to your victim never hearing Phone Guy's messages, and instead is assigned to clean the dining room long after the clock strikes midnight?
Five Nights at Freddy´s - Rated: T - English - Humor/Mystery - Chapters: 10 - Words: 21,562 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 156 - Follows: 90 - Published: 5/12/2018 - Mike Schmidt, Freddy Fazbear - Complete
Admittance by SugarButter reviews
Ennard likes to watch Scott sleep, but when he's caught, will he admit more than he is willing to tell Scott? One-shot. Based on Can't Go Home Again.
Five Nights at Freddy´s - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,445 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 5 - Published: 5/7/2018 - [Ennard, Phone Guy] - Complete
Can't Go Home Again by Mable reviews
Mike inherits his former boss' home after his death. Though he may have inherited a bit more than he expected once he actually goes inside. Now Mike is stuck in a situation he never expected, trying to keep himself together while figuring out what really happened at the Pizzeria, and what happened to the animatronic he is now stuck with.
Five Nights at Freddy´s - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Suspense - Chapters: 100 - Words: 636,120 - Reviews: 1143 - Favs: 612 - Follows: 442 - Updated: 5/4/2018 - Published: 5/21/2016 - Mike Schmidt, The Puppet, Jeremy Fitzgerald, Fritz Smith - Complete
Foxy's First Mate by InkyAnimatronic reviews
With Christmas around the corner, Foxy finds out that there's a new animatronic coming to Pirate's Cove. At first he's worried he's going to be killed and replaced but soon realizes that's not the case. Soon he comes to enjoy having company and his own little first matey. A apprentice if you will. Especially with Pirate's Cove re-opening.
Five Nights at Freddy´s - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 26 - Words: 34,498 - Reviews: 233 - Favs: 185 - Follows: 149 - Updated: 4/18/2018 - Published: 10/29/2014 - [Foxy, OC] Mike Schmidt, Freddy Fazbear - Complete
Silent Heaven by Vivica Night reviews
Hecate comes face to face with The Executioner, Pyramid Head, but before he kills her, Alessa halts it all, saving her life. Why her? Does she have some kind of importance to Silent Hill beyond her knowledge? Only time will tell as the truth of her true identity is revealed. Story cover drawn by me. Pyramid Head x OC
Silent Hill - Rated: M - English - Romance/Horror - Chapters: 37 - Words: 45,374 - Reviews: 60 - Favs: 120 - Follows: 111 - Updated: 3/8/2018 - Published: 2/1/2016 - Pyramid Head, Alessa G., Valtiel, Sharon D. - Complete
Trust by KeetahSpacecat reviews
There has been strange reports in Snowdin. Reports of small skeleton children. Reports of strange small skeletal creatures. All Grillby knows is that someone...or something...has been raiding his trashcans at night. He intends to find out who they are, and perhaps if they allow it, to help them. Gasterblaster AU Babyblaster AU Babybones AU. Mirrored from AO3/Tumblr
Undertale - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Family - Chapters: 14 - Words: 75,435 - Reviews: 64 - Favs: 192 - Follows: 135 - Updated: 1/16/2018 - Published: 3/6/2017 - Papyrus, Sans, Grillby, Gaster - Complete
Undertale: Welcome Player 2 by AngelPines reviews
Frisk traveled the entire Underground alone, every single time. That is, until she brought me along. Me, who had no idea monsters even existed. But why is it that she won't tell me about what happened before, in these 'other timelines? What had happened to her, and to the people living down here that makes them hesitant to talk about the past? Rewrite posted!
Undertale - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 16 - Words: 74,271 - Reviews: 46 - Favs: 129 - Follows: 79 - Updated: 12/12/2017 - Published: 1/25/2017 - Frisk, OC, Papyrus, Sans - Complete
Child of the Xenomorph by Xenomelia reviews
A whole new world. A fresh start to humanity. The pinnacle of humankind. Welcome to Origae-6. Elle has never known freedom. She is held captive by scientists for an unknown reason. Until she contacts the aliens they are studying, and her life changes forever . . .
Aliens/Predator - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 23,006 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 22 - Published: 11/19/2017 - Human, Alien/Xenomorph - Complete
Spectral Guardian by MixnSpice reviews
Once in a lone, stormy night, a human child meets his guardian for the first time. While not the ideal kind of what a guardian is like, his new ghostly friend could be exactly who he needs.
Undertale - Rated: K - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,308 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 6 - Published: 9/11/2017 - Frisk, Napstablook - Complete
It's So Big! by Dragonsrule18 reviews
Frisk and Papyrus are on their first real date upstairs, and Sans learns the hard way that it's a REALLY bad idea to eavesdrop. Set four years after the True Pacifist ending.
Undertale - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 962 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 12 - Published: 8/6/2017 - [Papyrus, Frisk] Sans - Complete
Poor Little Souls by Shadowfang14 reviews
Mike Schmidt knew the stories. He heard the rumors, of how the animatronic characters at Freddy Fazbear's come alive at night. How they go after every night guard who comes to work at the place-and how they then kill them by stuffing them into a suit. But with the help of an unlikely ally, he may live long enough to find out what's really going on.
Five Nights at Freddy´s - Rated: T - English - Horror/Family - Chapters: 37 - Words: 58,972 - Reviews: 366 - Favs: 279 - Follows: 193 - Updated: 7/25/2017 - Published: 4/2/2015 - Mike Schmidt, Foxy - Complete
Papyrus Really Likes Tetris by HavenOnEarth reviews
Our favorite puzzle-loving skeleton gets his gloves on the most daunting puzzle there is... Tetris.
Undertale - Rated: K - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,307 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/10/2017 - Papyrus, Sans - Complete
From red to white by deadlyswarm reviews
skele Frisk!AU Frisk had an illness before she went Underground, after leaving the barrier it gets worse, watch as the monsters do everything in their power to save their friend, and succeed, only not the way they expected. rated T
Undertale - Rated: T - English - Family/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 27 - Words: 61,428 - Reviews: 217 - Favs: 268 - Follows: 204 - Updated: 2/18/2017 - Published: 3/31/2016 - Frisk, Papyrus, Sans, Toriel - Complete
Happy Family by Sunfreckle reviews
Relatively short, happy chapters about life on the surface where Frisk, Toriel, Sans and Papyrus live together. Some hurt/comfort but nothing depressing, mainly happy monster family fluff. Romance is not the main focus, but there is Alphyne, eventual Soriel and Papyton bias. Alphys, Undyne, Asgore, Mettaton, Monster Kid, Asriel and Gaster (and more) also show up.
Undertale - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Friendship - Chapters: 66 - Words: 189,493 - Reviews: 526 - Favs: 269 - Follows: 184 - Updated: 2/9/2017 - Published: 2/18/2016 - Frisk, Papyrus, Sans, Toriel - Complete
Don't Tease the Pumpkin King by GodlyJewel reviews
If you dare try and tease the King of Halloween, best be prepared to pay the price. For there can be unforeseen consequences, as a little rag doll is about to find out.
Nightmare Before Christmas - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 6 - Words: 57,164 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 6/8/2016 - Published: 5/25/2016 - [Jack S., Sally] - Complete
The Shinigami Alchemist by xCleverFox reviews
It was a stupid way to die and yet here he was. Chaos abounds as Ed finds himself in a strange new world once again as a result of a car crash. Will the inhabitants of the Seireitei ever be the same? Read to find out. FMA/Bleach crossover. R&R
Crossover - Fullmetal Alchemist & Bleach - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Humor - Chapters: 34 - Words: 60,691 - Reviews: 480 - Favs: 459 - Follows: 422 - Updated: 2/20/2016 - Published: 2/12/2009 - Edward E., T. Hitsugaya - Complete
What Really Happens When Mike is Caught by dragoncraftertex reviews
What happens after the jumpscare? Is Mike really stuffed in a suit? Or just stuffed? Why are the nights so short? Find out, in (read the title again!) (1-shot)
Five Nights at Freddy´s - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 906 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 27 - Published: 1/2/2016 - Mike Schmidt, Freddy Fazbear, Chica, Foxy - Complete
After The 7th Night by Nameless2000 reviews
Mike Came Looking For A Job..With No REAL Family To Support Him, He Takes A Shot At Freddy Fazbear's Pizzeria. Mind Full Of Confidence And A Soldier's Determination, He Is Willing To Face Any Challenge Thrown At Him. But How Much Can He Take? Rated:T:For Swearing
Five Nights at Freddy´s - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 23 - Words: 22,600 - Reviews: 167 - Favs: 199 - Follows: 203 - Updated: 12/26/2015 - Published: 11/15/2014 - [Mike Schmidt, Bonnie] OC, Toy Bonnie - Complete
Slender Blind by kairi's friend reviews
Slender Man catches you only when you see him. But Trevor is blind. The two form an unlikely bond that is put to the test when Slenders and humans alike are all threatened.
Slender - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship/Mystery - Chapters: 26 - Words: 47,346 - Reviews: 85 - Favs: 83 - Follows: 59 - Updated: 12/5/2015 - Published: 4/5/2013 - Slender, OC - Complete
My Shadows by CrimsonTrainer-4395 reviews
Lilith Shadows, the newest Proxy of the infamous Slenderman. She wants nothing more then to forget her pasts, forget her sorrows, forget her fear. But, what happens when her past completely ignores her, and decides to come back anyway? Total middle finger from the past. Can Lilith survive her skeletons in her closet, her shadows? Rated T because this is gonna be bloody and gory.
Slender - Rated: T - English - Horror/Mystery - Chapters: 33 - Words: 116,208 - Reviews: 82 - Favs: 44 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 11/29/2015 - Published: 9/16/2015 - Slender, OC - Complete
Nightmare In Love by XenoInLove reviews
A young scientist develops a soft spot for a failed xenomorph experiment. Can he get through to the creature in time to flee and save them both? Or will they face their doom at the hand of a twisted, shady opponent? MalexMale/XenoxHuman/Gay, If you don't like it, don't read. Contents only suitable for mature readers, hence the M Rating.
Aliens/Predator - Rated: M - English - Romance/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 31 - Words: 66,357 - Reviews: 91 - Favs: 320 - Follows: 198 - Updated: 1/21/2015 - Published: 12/21/2014 - Alien/Xenomorph, Human, OC - Complete
A Gift of Vore by Smitty91 reviews
Sequel to "The Barbecue Job." The gang's home is being taken away, forcing them to relocate. While doing so, they stumble upon a fox. What does this fox want? Is he friend or foe? Does it intend on helping them in some way or does he mean them harm?
Over the Hedge - Rated: M - English - Family/Drama - Chapters: 15 - Words: 21,172 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 12/8/2014 - Published: 8/18/2014 - RJ - Complete
Twisted Friends, Loving Brothers by GingerbreadTARDIS99 reviews
Milly loves hanging out in the woods that surrounds her house. It's where her four best friends live. Call them part of her sick imagination, but they're oh so real. (A short story)
Slender - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,761 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 9 - Published: 10/31/2014 - Slender, OC - Complete
Slendy by ArashiKira reviews
Clair is saved one night, but the roles of hero and villain are not the usual ones... Now she has gained the interest of a supernatural being. But who is he? What does he want?
Slender - Rated: T - English - Mystery/Romance - Chapters: 27 - Words: 42,593 - Reviews: 72 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 50 - Updated: 8/21/2014 - Published: 3/1/2014 - Complete
The Barbecue Job by Smitty91 reviews
A nervous Heather asks RJ if they can go somewhere private to talk. But she seems to have a little more up her sleeve than just talking. What could she be u to, and what does Hammy have to do with it?
Over the Hedge - Rated: M - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 10,026 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 7 - Published: 8/4/2014 - Hammy, Heather, RJ - Complete
Mishaps and a Weird Family by AnimationNut reviews
A series of one-shots, primarily centering around Lilo and her interactions with her ohana. With the strangest family ever, hilarious situations are bound to take place. Now up: All Lilo and Stitch needed to do was find a Christmas tree. Who knew they could make a mess of Christmas tree shopping?
Lilo & Stitch - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship/Family - Chapters: 13 - Words: 28,527 - Reviews: 62 - Favs: 124 - Follows: 54 - Updated: 12/22/2013 - Published: 1/15/2012 - Complete
Christmas Greetings by dancer4813 reviews
Dudley gets a Christmas card from a cousin of his... Is their relationship on the mend? *Note that there are unanswered questions here, but that is so the reader can decide his own answers, and let their imagination take over.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,840 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 9/9/2013 - Complete
Nightmares of the Damned by EchoDrift reviews
When lone wolf apocalypse survivor Orella Knight goes on a regular nightly raid for supplies in a small cabin off in the forest, she finds more than the up risen dead waiting for her. But what she doesn't know is how this one unique event will change how she see's her life, and others, forever. Slender/OC
Slender - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 28 - Words: 69,601 - Reviews: 80 - Favs: 80 - Follows: 50 - Updated: 8/30/2013 - Published: 7/12/2013 - Slender, OC - Complete
Astrids Dirty Secret by moshyman reviews
Me and Hiccup have been married for a few years...He is busy and isn't around allot so we haven't had sex in a while...I needed something to release my pent up frustrations...His member was so huge...He was filling me up...I looked pregnant...we had sex so many times I had trouble counting.
How to Train Your Dragon - Rated: M - English - Parody/Fantasy - Chapters: 2 - Words: 7,698 - Reviews: 178 - Favs: 290 - Follows: 181 - Updated: 8/22/2013 - Published: 6/21/2013 - Astrid, Toothless
Admiring Teeth by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels reviews
Is that what they're calling it these days?
Rise of the Guardians - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,443 - Reviews: 57 - Favs: 252 - Follows: 54 - Published: 6/9/2013 - Jack Frost, Tooth - Complete
Mother Is God, Father Is Guardian by NetherStray reviews
So Pyramid Head showed up today. Not sure how or why, but he was an interesting house guest. Continuing chapters in the continuing epic of the best resort town ever.
Silent Hill - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 21 - Words: 45,259 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 47 - Follows: 27 - Updated: 5/30/2013 - Published: 2/4/2011 - Pyramid Head
Ooman by blacktalon117 reviews
Nova is a science experiment wishing it would all just come to an end. When scientists capture a full grown Yautja and put him in the cell next to hers, interests are raised. Maybe the warrior is just what Nova needs to make a break for freedom. Rated M. NOT FOR CHILDREN PEOPLE! Story now up for adoption, Have at people.
Aliens/Predator - Rated: M - English - Romance/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 36 - Words: 103,994 - Reviews: 1723 - Favs: 1,809 - Follows: 1,439 - Updated: 4/25/2013 - Published: 7/24/2009
A Logical Solution by Atheau reviews
It seems a normal day at the tower. But when Cyborg, Robin, and Starfire return to a scene they wouldn't expect in their wildest dreams, is it time for them to rethink the relationship between a certain shape-shifter and the dark empath?
Teen Titans - Rated: K - English - Friendship/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 690 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 57 - Follows: 4 - Published: 4/8/2013 - Beast Boy, Raven - Complete
The Backfired Prank by Moderately Mad Moxxi reviews
In which a prank Cyborg and Robin pull on Beastboy completely backfires, in one of the most horrible ways. BBRae. Humor.
Teen Titans - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,540 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 165 - Follows: 30 - Published: 3/17/2013 - Beast Boy, Raven - Complete
Dragon Claims and Human Change by Selim reviews
Hiccup didn't know it, but he's been chosen as a Dragon Mate. The world as he knows it changes, leaving him to decide – does he stay with humans or move on with dragons? Anthro-Toothless x Hiccup, mpreg, COMPLETE
How to Train Your Dragon - Rated: M - English - Fantasy/Romance - Chapters: 16 - Words: 70,497 - Reviews: 588 - Favs: 1,668 - Follows: 924 - Updated: 12/4/2012 - Published: 11/5/2011 - Toothless, Hiccup - Complete
Blood stained bunnies by LadyShadowHunter reviews
Not every monster is heartless and that was the case for red. Pyramid head was a hell forsaken demon with one little secret? One that contains bunnies (aka the notorious Robbie the Rabbit). Comedy/crack
Silent Hill - Rated: T - English - Humor/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,136 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 5 - Published: 10/7/2012 - Pyramid Head - Complete
Chance Encounter: Zoey by MrFoxHoundSir reviews
Last installment of the Chance Encounter series. What will the free runner Akira do when Zoey is in trouble? rater M for sexy time
Left 4 Dead - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,081 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 90 - Follows: 41 - Published: 12/21/2011 - Zoey - Complete
Chance encounter: Smoker by MrFoxHoundSir reviews
Akira has a hot and heavy encounter with a female smoker and her two friends
Left 4 Dead - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,545 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 96 - Follows: 41 - Published: 9/17/2011 - Smoker - Complete
kitsune brothers by MrFoxHoundSir reviews
Naruto is taken away after the sealing by his brother and returns twelve years later what will happen? OCXHarem NarutoXHarem
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 31 - Words: 120,973 - Reviews: 263 - Favs: 617 - Follows: 383 - Updated: 8/31/2011 - Published: 12/28/2007 - Naruto U. - Complete
Feeling? by MinakoTrickster reviews
Continuation of 'Talking' but with dear Tali and Legion. Legion decides to take the chance to let Tali know exactly how far the Geth have evolved and Tali is more then alright with this form of evolution.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,847 - Reviews: 56 - Favs: 118 - Follows: 38 - Updated: 8/20/2011 - Published: 9/18/2010 - Tali'Zorah, Legion - Complete
Not Your Usual Veela Mate by Janara reviews
Draco is a Veela and guess who his mate is? I've tried to write a Veela story where the two don't jump into bed immediately, hence the title. Will contain Dumbledore bashing. HPDM LMSS AU from book 5
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 69 - Words: 417,467 - Reviews: 9025 - Favs: 8,338 - Follows: 7,279 - Updated: 7/25/2011 - Published: 9/8/2005 - Harry P., Draco M.
Teaching Flames by nightshadowdark reviews
I was just trying to teach her, but I never expected to get in this deep with her. I just hope that Lia's fire is never put out.
Pokémon - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,441 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 82 - Follows: 28 - Published: 7/14/2011 - Blaziken/Bursyamo - Complete
Fuzzy Garage Time by Studio Red Moon reviews
Keira underestimates the strength of an Otsel's nose...
Jak and Daxter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 784 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/14/2011 - Daxter, Keira - Complete
Two Plus Two is Fish by Sulky Shadow reviews
Roxas never claimed to be good with numbers, but this was just ridiculous.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 953 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/15/2011 - Axel, Roxas - Complete
Chance Encounter: Witch by MrFoxHoundSir reviews
Free-Runner Akira has a chance encounter with a clingy and lovable Witch
Left 4 Dead - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,983 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 130 - Follows: 54 - Published: 4/24/2011 - Witch - Complete
Betrayal And Love by Fiddler-on-your-roof-gal reviews
A girl seeks to repair her friendship with her pokemon, a newly evolved blaziken she sent back home when he was still a torchic. lemon, camtains PKMN x HUMAN do not like or are underaged do not read!
Pokémon - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,031 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 81 - Follows: 26 - Published: 4/5/2011 - Blaziken/Bursyamo - Complete
Arachnophobia by 6 Six VI reviews
The fact the world's greatest detective has a fear of spiders is laughable. The fact that, one day, Light's going to grow a super spider to attack L is genius.
Death Note - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,477 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 133 - Follows: 22 - Published: 3/13/2011 - Light Y., L - Complete
The Demon experiments by Michi-nii reviews
A/U When genetically altered humans find themselves out of the lab, how will they react to the world around them? And how will others react to them?
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Friendship - Chapters: 17 - Words: 46,646 - Reviews: 82 - Favs: 125 - Follows: 60 - Updated: 3/7/2011 - Published: 6/26/2009 - Gaara, Naruto U. - Complete
Mission Impossible by Onyxlight reviews
The brothers Elric have a plan and they've put it into action...question is will they escape unnoticed?
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 273 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 2 - Published: 2/14/2011 - Alphonse E., Edward E. - Complete
Green and Yellow by Chico Magnifico reviews
It's Super Bowl Weekend! And of course Beast Boy and Cyborg butt heads about who's gonna win the big game. So how can BB show off his team colors? Read and Review!
Teen Titans - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,078 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 2/7/2011 - Published: 2/5/2011 - Beast Boy, Raven - Complete
Chance encounter: Huntress by MrFoxHoundSir reviews
Free-runner Akira has a chance encounter with a huntress Lemon
Left 4 Dead - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,936 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 158 - Follows: 70 - Published: 2/6/2011 - Hunter - Complete
Normality by generalzoi reviews
Myrtle may not be sure what normal is anymore, but she's pretty sure Lilo still doesn't qualify. Still, it's not like either of them really have friends of their own to hang out with, and beggars can't be choosers.
Lilo & Stitch - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,539 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 158 - Follows: 21 - Published: 1/27/2011 - Complete
A Different Kind of 'Choosen One' by Dreaming-Of-A-Nightmare reviews
After the ninja war, Naruto is called to Suna on Gaara's request. The blond takes Sakura with him, and at dinner, Naruto discovers that he's been choosen for something rather odd, but he's going to rise to meet this challenge..:.NaruGaa. My 200th fanfic!
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,763 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 118 - Follows: 17 - Published: 1/23/2011 - Naruto U., Gaara - Complete
Lunch Trouble by HoneyFlower15 reviews
Sakura can't cook, everyone knows this but for some reason Kiba still seems to eat the lunches she makes for him everyday. They want to know why and are planning on asking him. Now if they only could without him getting angry with them. KibaSaku
Naruto - Rated: K - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,619 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 78 - Follows: 14 - Published: 1/17/2011 - Kiba I., Sakura H. - Complete
Deeper Than Friends by Springdasie reviews
Hiccup and Toothless find themselves trapped on an island far from Berk. While they try to survive Hiccup struggles with his feelings for Toothless. To Hiccup's surprise however, he's not alone in his feelings. Hiccup/Anthro Toothless. R&R
How to Train Your Dragon - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,548 - Reviews: 43 - Favs: 427 - Follows: 142 - Published: 1/17/2011 - Hiccup, Toothless - Complete
Unmasked by LuxaLucifer reviews
One morning in Kakashi's house Anko talks to Kakashi and gets an unexpected result. He actually cares about her and proves it by doing just one thing.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,500 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 44 - Follows: 9 - Published: 1/16/2011 - Kakashi H., Anko M. - Complete
Dog's Life by ShivaVixen reviews
First in Ninja Life Series: Kakashi gets turned into a dog and his team takes care of him, they don't know it, and Kakashi doesn't know how he became a dog, but the cosequences of the transformation will change how they all look at each other, If only Kakashi knew how to change back
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 14 - Words: 22,663 - Reviews: 158 - Favs: 545 - Follows: 208 - Updated: 1/14/2011 - Published: 5/17/2007 - Kakashi H., Team Seven - Complete
Blow By Blow by Lady Drama reviews
The Eleventh Division's unofficial motto: It's not the size of the man in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the man.
Bleach - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,646 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 70 - Follows: 8 - Published: 1/14/2011 - K. Zaraki, Yachiru K. - Complete
Simple Gifts by Jordanna Morgan reviews
Al has a peculiar Christmas gift for Ed.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: K - English - Family/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 907 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/8/2011 - Alphonse E., Edward E. - Complete
Are We Mortal? by Dark-Eyed W0lf reviews
Life seemed all simple for the Valley of Peace. But will someone be put to peace after they're mortally wounded- with the only way to heal them by travelling to the Imperial city? Read and find out.
Kung Fu Panda - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 20 - Words: 82,002 - Reviews: 113 - Favs: 127 - Follows: 38 - Updated: 12/24/2010 - Published: 8/25/2009 - Po, Tigress - Complete
Just Adjectives by Hikareh reviews
"Green eyes. Black eyes. Tall. Short. All these were were just adjectives, simple words to describe something's physical appearance. He was still the same blue hedgehog on the inside." Sonic understands it's okay to change. Why doesn't everyone else?
Sonic the Hedgehog - Rated: K - English - Friendship/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,936 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 80 - Follows: 15 - Published: 12/20/2010 - Sonic, Tails - Complete
The Dance of Sand and Time by Griselda Banks reviews
Novelization of Sands of Time. In his quest for honor and glory, a prince unleashes the terrible Sands of Time. With the aid of but an ancient dagger and a devious princess, he now pursues redemption.
Prince of Persia - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 20 - Words: 49,670 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 12/11/2010 - Published: 7/24/2010 - Complete
Law and Morphine by Lizard Pie reviews
Faust launches a new drink line. It goes about as well as you'd expect. Mindless, revised crack.
Shaman King - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 365 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 4 - Published: 12/1/2010 - J. Faust VIII - Complete
Protector by crazynaomi123 reviews
Lilly is trapped in SilentHill and has no idea how to escape. Luckily our favorite BoogieMan of SilentHill is wiiling to protect and escort her to safety. But what happens when Lilly falls for her protector amd the protector have similar feelings? PHxOC
Silent Hill - Rated: T - English - Horror/Romance - Chapters: 12 - Words: 7,367 - Reviews: 53 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 11/28/2010 - Published: 8/31/2010 - Pyramid Head - Complete
Starting a Hive by Stunning Sunset reviews
On a backwater planet, a hybrid escapes a facility and runs into a human woman. Surprisingly, he does not kill her once he gets a whiff of the scent of her ripe body. AlienxHuman sex, can be disturbing at times, so use your judgment.
Aliens/Predator - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,911 - Reviews: 177 - Favs: 674 - Follows: 289 - Published: 11/25/2010 - Complete
Halloween Fever by ShinjiHiroku reviews
Four friends celebrate Halloween in a secluded cabin, little do they know what lies in wait. As we all know, deep in the woods, no one can hear you scream.
Pokémon - Rated: M - English - Horror/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,626 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 13 - Published: 10/26/2010 - Gengar/Gangar - Complete
Game Over by Arrluk reviews
AU: Hudson survives his deadly encounter with the aliens and makes it back to the ship with the rest of the crew. The only problem is that there are a limited number of pods left for a limited number of people. Game over, man. M for language
Aliens/Predator - Rated: M - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,995 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 3 - Published: 10/23/2010 - Complete
Anna and Thomas by Derek8121 reviews
A short story about a trainer and her Ivysaur, written as a challenge for my fellow WriteFriends.
Pokémon - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,838 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 45 - Follows: 6 - Published: 9/24/2010 - Ivysaur/Fushigisou - Complete
Talking? by MinakoTrickster reviews
A prompt on Kink. Seems Samara might have hidden desires for our Prof. Mordin. So she wants to talk...or more. Slight mention of a Tali/Legion
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,984 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 6 - Published: 8/25/2010 - Samara, Mordin S. - Complete
Old Pokemon, New Tricks by Talon Dragonborn reviews
When an Espeon's heat rolls around, she finds her sights set on her trainer...but their differences keep them apart. However, once she learns a special new attack, she decides to give him an experience he'll never forget...POKEMONXPOKEMON TF LEMON WARNING
Pokémon - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,294 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 183 - Follows: 57 - Published: 8/3/2010 - Espeon/Eifie, Flareon/Booster - Complete
DragonKin by Fyreheart reviews
AU. During the summer between Harry's 5th and 6th year, an ancestor of Harry's discovers the last of the line has been mistreated and decides it's time to intercede. Characters belong to J.K. Rowling.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Friendship - Chapters: 33 - Words: 157,154 - Reviews: 2776 - Favs: 11,147 - Follows: 4,507 - Updated: 7/19/2010 - Published: 10/29/2009 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Unexpected new life by unkown69 reviews
After Egypt sam thought that he could get his semi normal life back, but he had forgotten that his old life had ended and that this was a whole new life he was living.
Transformers - Rated: M - English - Romance/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 97 - Words: 259,383 - Reviews: 451 - Favs: 249 - Follows: 132 - Updated: 6/28/2010 - Published: 11/7/2009 - Bumblebee, Sam W. - Complete
Various ways of love by Pikana reviews
Pikabookshipping. Author/Smasher pairing. Don't like? Don't read. 35 sentences and 35 of Pikachu's ideas on how to be the perfect boyfriend. Results may vary and are not guarenteed.
Super Smash Brothers - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,493 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 7 - Published: 6/7/2010 - Pikachu - Complete
Blue Plate Special by Marie Goos reviews
After Oogway hires a stranger off the street to cook for Shifu and Tai Lung, things begin to get a little awkward.
Kung Fu Panda - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 36 - Words: 284,611 - Reviews: 172 - Favs: 102 - Follows: 48 - Updated: 5/27/2010 - Published: 1/4/2009 - Shifu, Tai Lung - Complete
Polarity by Chris Myers reviews
When a Romero-style zombie outbreak hits, three supervillains, led by a long time loser, find themselves doing whatever it takes to save themselves, and eventually, the rest of humanity.
Spider-Man - Rated: T - English - Horror/Supernatural - Chapters: 38 - Words: 325,457 - Reviews: 290 - Favs: 824 - Follows: 289 - Updated: 1/19/2010 - Published: 6/9/2009 - Rhino, Shocker - Complete
Titans meet an Alchemist by awalkingparadox reviews
When a strange series of murders happen in Jump City, the Titans only hope of catching the killer rests on their pizza boy. But this pizza boy isn't just any pizza boy, he's Edward Elric, the Full Metal Alchemist!
Crossover - Teen Titans & Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Mystery/Friendship - Chapters: 7 - Words: 15,501 - Reviews: 329 - Favs: 476 - Follows: 543 - Updated: 11/27/2009 - Published: 7/2/2009 - Robin, Edward E.
A Truth Is Told by FreudTastic reviews
Lucario's heart has been aching for quite a while, and he can't explain it. But with Aaron around, the pain seems to be relieved. Now he has to confess for his master and friend about the feelins he have. LucAaron Oneshot. Plz R&R
Pokémon - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,521 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 61 - Follows: 22 - Published: 9/22/2009 - Lucario, Sir Aaron - Complete
Impossible by Dark Tail Rabbit reviews
When Zack a pikachu joines forces with Amy the charmander, they end up sleeping in the same room and Zack is have some ideas...what happens when they are known?
Pokémon - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,489 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 3 - Published: 5/23/2009 - Pikachu - Complete
Remus Severus Snape by LoyalSlytherinForever reviews
When Harry's parents abandon him for dead when his twin is the GWL, Harry is adopted by his godfather Remus and Remus' husband Severus Snape. au/ooc, slash HP/DM, SS/RL
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Family/Drama - Chapters: 129 - Words: 314,171 - Reviews: 1716 - Favs: 2,276 - Follows: 1,020 - Updated: 1/24/2009 - Published: 3/16/2008 - Severus S., Remus L. - Complete
That's Why They Call It the Present by Luna Goldsun reviews
The road to redemption is a difficult one to follow. Everyone has their own struggles to overcome, even the Dragon Warrior himself, and some, like Tai Lung, need all the help they can get. How they will overcome is anyone's guess.
Kung Fu Panda - Rated: T - English - Drama/Friendship - Chapters: 25 - Words: 163,355 - Reviews: 243 - Favs: 258 - Follows: 85 - Updated: 9/26/2008 - Published: 7/4/2008 - Tai Lung, Po - Complete
Harry Potter and the Forgotten Heirs by Capricious Purple Clarity reviews
SEQUEL! GWHP crossover. The Gundam pilots plus Draco attempt to go on with their lives as usual, which isn't very usual at all. But what's this about a second prophecy? And why is Harry looking for an Heir to Slytherin that isn't Voldemort? YAOI
Crossover - Gundam Wing/AC & Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 20 - Words: 188,250 - Reviews: 1253 - Favs: 668 - Follows: 654 - Updated: 8/28/2008 - Published: 4/1/2006 - Harry P., Draco M., Duo M., Heero Y.
Harry Potter and the Secret Link by Capricious Purple Clarity reviews
Revised 12-06-17. Watch as Duo chips away at the very foundation of Hogwarts as he breaks down House walls, befriends Gryffs and Slyths alike, mugglfies Malfoys, and flushes cherry bombs down school toilets. Read, laugh, enjoy. YAOI
Crossover - Gundam Wing/AC & Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 29 - Words: 141,044 - Reviews: 1277 - Favs: 1,125 - Follows: 328 - Updated: 3/8/2006 - Published: 7/6/2005 - Harry P., Draco M., Duo M., Heero Y. - Complete
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Elem
Hey! First chapter-fanfic. Humor and craziness abound! RATED T FOR LANGUAGE. This is after the series ends.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 876 - Updated: 12/29/2010 - Published: 12/8/2010
The Mirror reviews
This is my first fanfic. Yayz! I don't know if this WOULD be called "fanfiction:, seeing as it is all from my brain, but I had it, and it wanted to get out, so I am inflicting it onto you. It may be melodromatic, but I was bored. Enjoy!
Misc. Books - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 69 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 10/27/2010 - Complete