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Anyway...

My name is Mae. I like, like stuff. I'm in love with Chris Colfer, and I've named my stuffed giraffe after him. Darren Criss would be my second choice... but because he's straight he'll have to do. I ship Klaine like a mad person. I then watch Doctor Who until the dead of night when I must join the clan of nymphs back in Candyland. Did you know in Candyland, where I live, Chris Colfer is straight? And he's in love with me? And Harry Potter is in love with Blaine Anderson- okay, that was uncalled for but I couldn't help it. That sentence was for the kid in my art class who enjoys shouting "Rumbleroarrrrrr!" I then high-five him and tell him that only the best wizards wear diapers. We can go one for the entire period, and I still don't even know his name. I refer to him as Ron when I'm talking about him. Then I tell him about this show about an alien with a magic screwdriver and a box. :)

Also, write here is where I'm supposed to write all my fanfiction pet peeves... and I only have one-

1. People who have fanfiction pet peeves.

I mean, we all have them, but some people just sort of say, well, if you do such and such, "don't write." It's sort of cruel. I'll make it known right now, the thing that annoys me most in life, and kills me on Fanfiction- ehem, "OK" is spelt "okay" with an "ay." And sometimes I'll even tell people, but I don't tell them that should stop them from writing. For all my buddies with terrible grammar, you have my sympathy- I'd be kicked off the Internet if I didn't have spell check. Everyone has weaknesses, and it's good to tell them what they are if they don't know them, but Fanfiction is a place where anyone can write- if don't like Mpreg or anything else in the varying crack!fic style, please don't read it. If you don't like someones grammar, don't read it. We all hate flames- and when you tell someone they shouldn't write because they live in a different country and spell a character name different, they mix up their "there-their-they're"s, they don't know when to start and end a paragraph- that's exactly like a flame. Politely correcting their grammar is fine, or giving them a helpful hint on their grammar or whatever is awesome. But telling someone they shouldn't write because maybe they're not as "intelligent" as you, or whatever you want to call it, is just mean. You're not the only one who loves writing- and honestly, how would you feel if someone told you that you shouldn't write just because you missed the week of school where they covered prepositional phrases or whatever? It's never someones fault they don't know something- and I'm being terribly redundant here- but please don't do it because it is just mean, whether you realize it or not.

You've probably guessed I spend all my time writing fanfiction of varying quality. You're right.

My In-Progress Stories-

Iscariotic-

It's been floating in my head for about forever, and about the night before I posted it, I came up with an epic plot twist that I could not not write. This will probably be updated about once or twice a week. If I haven't updated anything in a month, I hereby give thou permissions to yell at me through PM.

My Completed Stories-

Puppy Love-

This story sucks.

There, you got your warning. Go click on it if you still want to, but I don't suggest it. The plot is confusing and unrealistic. This was written when we really still knew nothing about Blaine, really, so he's sort of OOC. I didn't have Microsoft Word when this was written, so the grammar is still terrible, mostly because I don't care enough to go back and fix it. I'd say there are definitely parts I'd look back on and like, but this was my first ever fanfiction, my first ever real chapter-story, in fact, so I didn't have near enough experience. I barely edited it at all.

But I was bursting with pride when I wrote this, so I'm not going to delete it. If someone told me I deleted this story when I was still writing it, I probably would of cried or something. I'd never had that much recognition, ever, for going something before, and I'd been in a tough place before that, so my self-confidence was still unbalanced and confused. I was going a full turn, and I was arrogant with these reviews all the sudden. And let me tell you one thing-

Sometimes, being arrogant for just a while is beautiful.

So, yeah. there's a lot of personal meaning to this story. I'll embrace it's bad plot and unrealistic characters. It still is sort of funny, and it still is fairly well written for some time. So if you haven't clicked on it already, or for some reason you're still reading this, I'd probably say it isn't the best way to spend the next hour or so. But if you're really that bored, go ahead. Review when you're done.

Slushied-

I am very proud of this oneshot, actually. I'm not going to spend too long talking about personal significance or anything like that you don't want to read, but it's good. And I still can't wait for Season 3 to begin so I can see what will really happen when Blaine joins out beloved "Nude Erections" and discovers what it's like to be hit with a slushie. Unless Ryan Murphy decides to go all extremely creative on us, I'd imagine it'd be something like that.

My Bacon Breath-

Look, I was bored and battling writer's block. It's not bad... it's just... insane?

Hawt-

First of- "hawt" is "hot" spelled wrong. I thought it was obvious, but according to all the raising eyebrows and looks of "girl-you-spell-like-a-kindergartner" implied otherwise. It's supposed to be like "hot" with a Jersey accent.

It just sounded like something Snooki would do, sorry.

Uhhggg. Now I've brought Snooki onto my profile. Someone just shoot me with the killing curse before I'm forced to do it myself.

But anyway, I wrote this when I was drunk on Coke- meaning Cola-Cola- at my friends house, and I was just trying to make my friend laugh. But then she said she'd do whatever, I forget know, if I posted it, so I did, and I sort of regret it now because I think it makes me look like death died and came back to life riding a rainbow unicorn.

I Will Follow You Into The Dark-

A songfic for this song, also known as I Will Follow You Into The Dark by Death Cab For Cutie.

This is one of my favorite songs, despite being terribly depressing. I was listening to it on loop, and suddenly I got this idea, and I was procrastinating from writing my other story I desperately needed to update. So this happened. I made a lot of people cry, and I'm proud. I'm not proud of killing off two of my favorite characters on television, but I'm very proud of making many people cry.

And giving one of my best friends nightmares. God, the look on your her face with "a flick of the wrist." I thought she was going to puke. Sorry, Erin.

Fabulous In Tardis Blue

Hah! An exception- not finished. Basically most of the episode The Eleventh Hour of Doctor Who with Kurt replacing Amy Pond. It's good, just not finished, and never will be.

I always thought these things were kind of pointless... but I couldn't resist.

(Glee)

1) Sam
2) Mike
3) Rachel
4) Blaine
5) Karofsky
6) Puck
7) Mercedes
8) Tina
9) Finn
10) Quinn
11) Kurt
12) Mr. Shue

1. Have you ever read five/ten fic before?

Karofsky/Quinn...? Uhm... no. I'm sort of doubting they exist. I mean, Karofsky is already in the closet, so a relationship would be a little weird... unless you're a FaBerry fan, I could totally see the whole beards thing going on.

2. Do you think three is hot? How hot?

Rachel? In all honesty, in 2x02 when she did her Brittany Spears dance, I think the politically correct term would be, yes, extraordinarily attractive.

4. Do you recall any good fics about nine?

I don't read many about Finn, but I have fallen upon my fair share of Furt fics and I can only say good things about the majority of them.

5. Would seven and two make a good couple?

Mercedes/Mike? I mean... that doesn't sound bad- I totally ship Samcedes, but if they don't work out, I could actually see that happening... but what would we call it? Merike? That sounds that merman!mike. Ohmigod... that would be awesome.

6. Four/eight or four/nine?

Blaine/Tina or Blaine/Finn?

Okay, a Blaine/Tina friendship would be nonetheless fabulous. I could totally see Blaine coming to Tina for advice on Kurt, she saying some suggestive stuff about Asain men. Then he asks for fashion advice, because he can't ask Kurt because it's for their date, so she puts him in this big goth outfit and Kurt's all confused... that would be absolutely lovely. But a relationship? As nice as "Blina" and "Taine" sound, Blaine is gay. Period. I ship Klaine too much to let this be acceptable. But I think, in the case Blaine was straight, they'd be sort of adorable.

Blaine/Finn. No. No, no, no, no. It's just- no. No further elaboration needed.

So if I had to chose, Blina all the way!

7. What would happen if seven discovered three and eight in a secret relationship?

Mercedes discovered Rachel and Tina in a secret relationship? As crack as it sounds, I'm sure Mercedes reaction would be something along the lines of: "I thought you both were straight?"

8. Make up a summary of at least twenty words for a two/six fic.

Mike/Puck: To put it simply, Puckerman is hot. No further explanation needed. Tina is fabulous... but Mike can only wonder... what can Puck do that Tina can't? Soon enough, Puck is wondering the same thing.

THAT I DON'T BELIEVE I'LL EVER BE WRITING!

9. Is there a such thing as a four/ten romantic fluff story?

Blaine/Quinn! OHMIGOD, I READ A FIC LIKE THAT SOMEWHERE AND ALMOST GOT TO THE THIRD CHAPTER BEFORE I STOPPED! I know they developed some sort of fuzzy feelings for each other, but I have not the slightest clue as to whether or not this led to fluff.

10. Suggest a title for a one/five Hurt/Comfort fanfic.

Sam/Karofsky. GET READY-

Oshkosh. The brand of Sam's jeans. Because Dave is always checking out the handsome devil, and Sam helps him through this entire "coming out" process. Tears and angst to ensure!

11. What kind of plot would you use for three/eleven fanfic?

Rachel/Kurt? Oh, I don't know, sneaking into Wicked... oops- taken. Oh! I know! The go to NYADA and we explore their journeys there! Wait- you mean half of the world already came up with that? Oh.

Okay, actually, I think it would something like Rachel falling head over heels for Kurt. He has to explain he wants nothing more than a friendship- he's gay- but she won't stop. AH! I HAVE TO GO WRITE THIS NOW!

12. Do you read seven het? What about nine slash?

Mercedes het- I do not believe...

Finn slash- It's hard to resist that unrequited love that is Furt- or the absolutely lovely relationship that is Fuck! (Finn/Puck!)

13. Would one have sex with twelve?

Sam/Mr. Shue...

Be right back- I have to go clense my mind with some Elmo's World because that is the most crack thing I have ever heard of in my short and odd life.

14. If you wrote a two/three/six fic, what would the warning be?

Mike/Rachel/Puck:Homosexuality, threesome, tons of alcohol abuse, and CRACK!

15. What pick up line might eight use on five?

Tina: Hehe. You're attractive! Wanna do it?

Karofsky: I'm gay.

THAT IS MY LACK OF CREATIVITY. RIGHT THERE. EMBRACE IT.

16. Challenge: Write a drabblefic for ten/eight.

Tina/Quinn:

Quinn was a for fashion. Maybe a more relaxed, white sand and blue ocean kind of style, but she loved it. She knew from day one she and Tina and that in common, even if their styles were so different it put strain on the eyes.

At first, it was always a "let's-be-friends!" kind of attraction to Tina. But when this task was completed... she craved more. She was suddenly questioning the sexuality she'd come to know as he own. One thing was for sure- she couldn't take her eyes of that goddamn princess with her daily Halloween costumes.

Slowly, she began to dislike these clothes, with a burning passion that didn't allow her to sleep at night. She couldn't put a finger on this hatred until she finally found it, after brushing pat her in lunch:

The thick inch of clothing on Tina's skin was driving her insane, leaving almost everything to the imagination.

Take that! It's terrible and I don't even care!

17. What would happen if seven walked in on two and Twelve having sex?

Mercedes walked in on Mike and Mr. Shue? Well, after Mercedes received much therapy, she spoiled the truth, and Mr. Shue was sent to jail and Mike was left heartbroken.

18. What kind of plot would you use if you wanted four to de-flower one?

Blaine/Sam. Oh my. I'm sure it would go a little something like this:

Sam comes out to Blaine. He's all upset because he had no idea what he's doing-

"You know, I can teach you about it. My last boyfriend needed pamphlets from his father... but you know what? I think we can get a little more creative than that." *wink wink*

And then- well, you know what happens. De-flowering.

19. Does you read seven slash?

Mercedes doesn't really have many slash fics.

20. Do you read three het?

Ever heard of "FaBerry?" Well, Rachel is the "Berry" in this ever so popular pairing. I'm sure on of my friends has.

21. Do you write or draw eleven?

KURT! Are you kidding me? Kurt is Kurt. I live for Kurt. No go away for asking such a silly question.

22. What might ten scream at a moment of great passion?

Woopee! Yay! I don't know. I don't know much about Quinn.

23. When was the last time you read a fic about five?

... Last week?

24. What is six's super-secret kink?

Well... he's Puck. His kink is female. His super-secret kink? Male.

25. Would eleven shag nine? Drunk or sober?

Kurt shagging Finn. Back in season one, he could probably do it sober. Now that we've reached season two, maybe I could see it happening if he wasn't trying to impress Blaine at the Rachel Berry House Party Extravaganza.

26. If three and seven get together, who tops?

Mercedes/Rachel. You know what? I don't even want to think about it. (Ehem, Rachel.) This is disgusting and pointless. (Yeah, totally Rachel.)

27. One and nine are in a happy relationship until nine runs off with four. One, broken hearted, has a hot, one night stand with eleven and a brief unhappy affair with twelve, then follows the wise advice of five and finds true love in two. What title would you give this fic?

Sam and Finn are in a happy relationship until Finn runs off with Blaine. (I thought we discussed I didn't approve of this relationship!) Sam, broken hearted, has a hot, one night stand with Kurt (ahh, Kum, the irony) and a brief unhappy affair with Mr. Shue (Sam really needs to work on his sense in partners! First Finn, now Mr. Shue?), then follows the wise advice of Karofsky (I'd think Karofsky would be the last to give good advice in gay relationships...) and finds true love in Mike!

Woah. To all you people who think Sam is straight, apparently my subconscious disagrees.

Alright... you ready? I am-

Sike!

Yup. WORDPLAY. It's like Grilled Cheeses was playing jokes on Sam, so he'd be saying "syke!" But then he and Mike fell in love, leading into the relationship name "Sike." I apologize, but I feel smart AND cheesy. :D

28. How would you feel if seven/eight was canon?

Mercedes/Tina. Can I tell you a secret?

It shouldn't be.