Poll: What did you think of ANGEL? Vote Now!
Author has written 9 stories for Harry Potter, Misc. Books, Maximum Ride, Saving Zoe, Merlin, Greek Mythology, and Lord of the Rings.
I will try to change my pic every other day, pics courtesy of snorg tees
If you actually read through my ridiculously long profile, you get a prize! It's a sense of accomplishment!(this can also be easily confused with the sense that we both have no life)
Before you do read my profile, if you have read Maximum Ride(you better have) and you do not want Catherine Hardwicke to ruin the MR movie, go to: and sign the petition that St. Fang of Boredom put up! Seriously, go! Sign it! Even if you don't want to! Or else I will find you...
Plz go to this website: . Holden Uganda was started by a couple who had a still born baby (a baby who was born dead) named Holden. They decided to pay for a fresh water well in Africa and have their baby's name engraved on the well. Their goal was to build 9 wells in 9 months that were in memory of still born's, my baby cousin's well was built a few weeks ago and is number 17 since December 2010.
If you hate Justin Bieber, than copy and paste this on to your profile and add your name to the list: deathtobieber, NinjaTerra, alexisshadow101, EchoestepJ38, willow seafeather, maia sky
Join the Anti-Bieber club! we need your support.
Hey, I'm Maia
Here's a bit about me-
I live in Canada B .C.
I read Obssesively
I love to write fiction
I want to be an author someday
I can speak, read and write in french as well as I do in english( I know I'm a true Canadian, eh?)
I love piercings and dyed hair
I'm a total greek mythology nerd
I have 5 animals, a dog, 2 cats, a fish and a brother
My favorite colour is blue
My favorite food is chocolate
My favorite animal is a platypus
My favorite song is Comatose by Skillet
I love spiders, snakes, rats and mice
I'm deathly afraid of Barney (yes the big purple dinosaur)
And finally, I think that James Patterson should burn in hell (If you have read 'FANG' or The Lake House, you should agree)
The 6 Truths of Life
1. You can't lick all your teeth with your tongue
2.You just tried to do the above
3.The first one is a lie
4.You're smiling right now because you're realizing you're an idiot
5.You are going to post this on your page for some other sucker to read it
6.You're smiling like an idiot right now
Things that will keep 8th graders busy
1.Trying to draw a picture on a piece of paper that's taped to the bottom of a desk.(like Michelangelo! Kind of...)
2. A video pack man.
3. The big red button. (on iambored.com)
4. Plastic piping, syringes and water.(you don't want to know)
5. Jousting in the halls.(socials class is fun)
6. Modleing clay.
7. A big styrafoam ball.
8. Fairy dust!(again, you don't want to know)
9. Anything shiny.(sadly, this includes my nose ring)
The ones in bold are me.
I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
Stereotypes make no sense.
Stereotypes aren't cool.
Stereotypes are WRONG.
10 Commandments of a Teenager
1) Thou shalt not sneak out whilst thy parents are sleeping.
YOU SAY PLAYBOY
I SAY GET A LIFE
YOU SAY MILEY CYRUS
I SAY PARAMORE
YOU SAY JONAS BROTHERS
I SAY RED JUMPSUIT APPARATUS
YOU SAY JUSTIN BIEBER
I SAY FALLOUT BOY
YOU SAY POP
I SAY ROCK
YOU SAY I'M WEIRD
I SAY NO SHIT, SHERLOCK. NOW, LET ME GET BACK TO PLOTTING YOUR DEATH!
THE BOY/GIRL QUIZ
YOUR GUY SIDE:
You love hoodies.(who doesn't?)
YOUR GIRL SIDE:
You wear lip gloss/stick.
Apparently I’m a boy. I must have this whole biology thing really mixed up. My sex ed teacher has some serious explaining to do.
X You own a cell phone.
X Black is one of your favorite colors.
X You can skateboard
X You love the computer.
X You watch/watched the Super bowl.
X You like loud music.
10 ways to tell if your obsessed with a book or series
1.You feel like the characters in the books are real
2.You day dream about meeting the characters in your books
3.You have a freaking melt down when one of the characters in your book dies or leaves
4.You send mucho hate mail to the author when they kill off a character
6.You start writing your own endings to a series because the books aren't coming out fast enough
7. You want to be an author because of a book that you read
8. Your friends tell you that you talk about books way too much
9.You read until 4am
10. You do a mad search for the next book in the series every time you finish one
Does all of this apply to me? Yes
Is it just a little bit sad? Yes
Do I care? No
You know you're a writer when...
- you talk to yourself.
- you don't think that it's wired to talk to yourself
- yo have/have had no or little social life beyond writing and reading at some point.
- you write for so long that the letters start to float off the page.
- you stay up all night reading/writing fan fiction
-And finally, the number one way to tell if you’re a writer: If you worship English 101.
Copy and Paste this if you're a writer.
You know you lived in 2010 when:
1.You accidentally enter your password on a microwave.
2.You haven't played solitaire withreall cards in years.
3.The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is that they don't have AIM/facebook/Myspace.
4.You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the button the TV.
6.Your evening activity is sitting at the computer.
7.As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.
8.You read this list, and keep nodding and smiling.
9.You think about how stupid you are for reading this.
10.You were too busy to notice there's no number five.
11. you actually scrolled back up to checkif there was a number five.
12.And now you're laughing at your stupidity.
13.Put this on your pro if you fell for it. You know you did.
If I went to Hogwarts these rules would have to be made...
1) The Giant Squid is not an appropriate date to the Yule Ball
THINGS TO DO ON AN ELEVATOR
1) CRACK open your briefcase or handbag, peer Inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"
2) STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.
3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.
4) GREET everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.
5) MEOW occasionally.
6) STARE At another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM" - and back away slowly
7) SAY -DING at each floor.
8) SAY "I wonder what all these do?" And push all the red buttons.
9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10) STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on."
11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"
12) TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13) DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space."
14) WHEN there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.
15) PUSH the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
16) ASK if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.
17) HOLD the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"
18) DROP a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"
19) BRING a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
20) PRETEND you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the Passengers.
21) SWAT at flies that don't exist.
22) CALL out "Group hug" then enforce it.
23) BRING a picnic basket and ask the other passengers to tea.
15 Things to do when you're in Walmart!
1. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
2. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
3. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, "'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.
4. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
5. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
6. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
7. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
8. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
9. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the antidepressants are.
10. Dart around the store suspiciously, loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
11. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look".
12. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME! PICK ME!"
13. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream... "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"
14. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"
15.Grab alot of bouncy balls and throw them down the aisle, shouting "Go, Pikachu, Go"
20 things to do at a hockey game
1.Pretend to be a spy and sing your own personal spy music really loudly.
2.Pretend to stalk someone and be really obvious about it.
3.Start singing take me out to the ball game at the top of your lungs.
4.Bring a really loud whistle, sit close to the rink and blow it every once in a while, then watch everyone stop and look confused when they think that the ref blew the whistle.
5.Start talking to a random person then when they ask who you are say "I can't believe you don't remember me!" Then burst into tears and run away.
6.Stalk the team mascots.
7.Follow around the people who have the fan cam.
8.Sneak into an empty box seat and see how long you can stay there without getting caught.
9.Walk into the bathroom then ask someone in there where the bathroom is.
10.Pick a random person and bump into them every time you see them.
11.Get one of your little siblings go go buy a 50/50 then when the people who are selling the tickets say that you have to be 18 to buy one, get them to act all flattered and calmly tell the sales people that they're 42.(It works best when they're 8 or 9)
12.Clutch at your throat dramaticaly and pretend to die while you're walking around the rink.
13.When one of the players scores a goal shout "TOUCH DOWN!" as loud as you can.
14.Throw popcorn at the people sitting in front of you then pretend that you didn't do it when they look at you.
15.Start cheering like a maniac...when the zamboni is on the rink.
16.Wear the jersey of a team that isn't playing.
17.See if you can buy beer without getting carded.
18.Think of 20 things to do at a hockey game.
19. See how long it takes to get kicked out of the arena.
20. Ask one of the players to sign a football.
100 things to do when your bored in class.
Devise a secret code with your friends then hand in the homework in that code
Continually ask questions so that the professorcan’t give homework
Answer the teacher’s questions in slow motion
Answer questions only with one word
Scream random words without anybody noticing it’s you
Continuously yawn until everyone is yawning
Ask your professor personal questions
Every time the professor finishes talking clap
Talk very fast
Call the professor “Mom” or “Dad”
Count your hair
Talk with an accentAnswer questions in a different language
Pretend to be scared of everything
Draw cartoon characters of your classmates or of the professors
Quote Family Guy
Write out plan on how to conquer the world
Pretend to Choke
Pretend to be drunk
Tap your feet on the ground loudly
Raise your hand for every question your teacher asks you but answer “oh i forgot”
Pretend to slip
Wink at the teacher
Wink at random people
Smack your thigh and smile at the people who look at you
Smile the whole lesson
When the teacher enters the room give a low bow
Pretend to sleep and snore loudly
Drop your pen and say “accio”
Ask your teacher where the potions room is
Ask the teacher where he/she is
Fake Fart Sounds
Ask the teacher for his/her phone number
Spill you pencil case/box on the floor
Pretend to be sick
Pretend to have photographic memory
Tell people “I’m Pregnant”Ask out the teacher
Repeat movie lines
Pretend you are Harry Potter and your scar hurts
Sing your favorite song
Twitter the whole lesson
Pretend to be Indian
Write a love note to the teacher
Talk to yourself
Snort Eraser dust
When the teacher enters the room Scream “next”
When the Teacher enters the room ask for a refund
On your assignments write very small or extremely big
Act like a nerd
Pull a “Michael Jackson”
Put some red ink on a ruler, then slash your wrists with it so people think you cut yourself
Talk in slang
Get into a fight with yoursel
fPretend you are a gangster
Pretend you are high
Bring a bag of flour to school and on your desk make lines of flour and attempt to snort them
Once the teacher enters the room get the whole class to sing the national anthem
Stare at one object in the classroom for one lesson
Rate the teacher
Pretend you are “Susan Boyle” and sing “I Dream a Dream
Touch a Plug and pretend to get electrocuted
Make odd animal noises
Act like an undercover spy
Write down everything the teacher says while repeating what they say
Laugh Stupidly for no reason
Act as if you were blindSit on the floor and beg for money
Think of the best excuses for being late/ not handing in your homework
Lick your stationary seductively while staring at a person
Begin Cussing at your self
Talk in gangster rap
Challenge your teacher to a rap battle
Pretend to chew gum
Point out the window and say “LOOK EVERYBODY SPIDER MAN” once every one looks say “oh too late he’s gone now”
Write a love note and leave it on the chair when you change period
Play an air guitar
Throw paper airplanes
Say random facts about people
Go up to someone you have never talked to before then tell them “i have this problem for years now i can’t take it anymore”
Narrate your life
Whistle at random things
Count random things
Pass notes to people you have no interest in
Ask personal details about people you would never have talked to
Play your favorite song in your head
Think of what the teacher’s life was like
Rhyme the last words of everybody’s sentences
Play paper football
Search in your bag/binder for things you don’t have
Attempt to Find Nemo
Take some take and give yourself a waxing
Find a better thing to do than find 100 things to do when bored
This is the fricking funniest thing ever! My stomach still hurts, I was laughing so hard!
Some examples of why the human race has probably evolved as far as possible. These are actual instruction labels on consumer goods..
On Sears hairdryer:
On a bag of Fritos:
On a bar of Dial soap:
On some Swann frozen dinners:
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of the box):
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
On Nytol sleep aid:
On a Korean kitchen knife:
On a string of Christmas lights:
On a food processor:
On Sainsbury's peanuts:
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
On a Swedish chainsaw:
On a child's Superman costume:
On a box of Midol PMS relief tablets:
"Warning: do not use if you have prostate problems."
(Hmmm... I wonder why?)
On a curling iron:
"For external use only!!"
(Hey Bill what you eatin? Aw just balloni. What bout you? A curling iron.)
Take Time To Read Each Sentence
This is this cat
This is is cat
This is how cat
This is to cat
This is keep cat
This is a cat
This is retard cat
This is busy cat
This is for cat
This is forty cat
This is seconds cat
Now read the THIRD word of every sentence
This is the stupid test! 100 stupid things that people do! (The things in bold are the idiotic events that I have done.)
1. Forgot to put the lid on the blender, turned it on, and had everything fly out
Dang...93. How the hell am I on honour roll?! My teachers are crazy.
Cuz I'm bored...
MAXIMUM RIDE FAN QUESTIONS:
2. Did you cry when Ari died?
Do you even have to ask? YES!! Duhr.
4. How do you pronounce Ari's name?
5. Do you laugh every time you read the name Mr. Chu?
6. -SPOILER ALERT- In MAX, did you laugh hysterically when Total started talking about marriage?
7. -SPOILER ALERT- Did you squeal at all the faxness in MAX?
8. Did you angrily throw your book across the room when the flock split up?
9. Who is your favorite character?
10. Do you like Jeb?
11. -SPOILER ALERT- Were you making a genuine "WTF" face when Max and Fang grew gills?
12. Did you think MAX was better than TFW?
13. -SPOILER ALERT- Did you get slightly fed up with Nudge and Angel's slight attitudes in MAX?
14. Which book is your all time favorite?
15. If the flock had a theme song, what would it be?
16. Have you ever imagined the flock as a band playing whatever song comes up when listening to your iPod?
17. Who do you think the voice should be?
18. Do you think one or more members of the flock should learn to play an instrument?
19. What bugged you the most about TFW?
20.Fax or Miggy?
Date: September 12th, 2011
1, What color is your toothbrush?
2, Name one person who made you smile today:
Abbey, the 2 year old daughter of the faciltator for my girls group.
3, What were you doing at 8 am this morning:
4, What were you doing 45 minutes ago?
5, What is your favorite candy bar?
6, Have you ever been to Disney World?
7, What is the last thing you said aloud?
8. What is your favorite ice cream flavor?
9, What was the last thing you had to drink?
10, Do you like your wallet?
11, What was the last thing you ate?
12, Have you bought any new clothing items this week?
13, The last sporting event you watched?
14, What is your favorite flavor of popcorn?
15, Who is the last person you sent a text message to?
16, Ever go camping?
At least once every summer, usually more.
17, Do you take vitamins daily?
18, Do you go to church every Sunday?
19, Do you have a tan?
20,Do you prefer Chinese food over pizza?
21, Do you drink your soda with a straw?
22, What did your last text message say?
23, What are you doing tomorrow?
25, Look to your left, what do you see?
26, What color is your watch?
27, What do you think of when you hear Australia?
28, What is your birthstone?
29, Do you go in at a fast food place or just hit the drive thru?
30, What is your favorite number?
31, Who's the last person you talked to on the phone?
32, Any plans today?
33, How many states have you lived in?
34, Biggest annoyance right now?
35, Last song listened to?
I'm listening to Astronaut by Simple Plan.
36,Can you say the alphabet backwards?
37, Do you have a maid service clean your house?
38, Favorite pair of heels?
39, Are you jealous of anyone?
40, Is anyone jealous of you?
41, Do you love anyone?
42, Do any of your friends have children?
44, Do you hate anyone that you know right now?
45, Do you use the word 'hello' daily?
46, What color is your car?
47, Do you like cats?
48. Are you thinking about someone right now?
49, Have you ever been to Six Flags?
50, How did you get your worst scar?
51, What is your real name?
52, Are you a girl or guy?
53, Where do you plan on going for college?
54, What is the last book you read?
Along Came a Spider by James PattersonI'm reading City Of Ashes by Cassandra Claire and Cat and Mouse by JP again.
55, What is on your TV right now?
I think my dad's watching M.A.S.H. but I'm not sure.
56, What is the last thing you have said and to who?
57, Where are you?
58, What was the last thing you thought?
57, What would you do with a million dollars?
58, Grab the closest thing next to you. What was it?
59, What are you writing right now?
60, What is it like being you?
61, What are your thoughts on writing?
A friend gives you their umbrella in the rain.
A best friend takes yours and says, "Run, loser, run!
A friend wipes your tears when you're rejected.
A best friend goes up to him and says, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"
A friend bails you out of jail.
A best friend is the one sitting next to you saying, "That was fun! Let's do it again once we get out of this dump."
A friend talks you out of running away.
A best friend asks, "Do you want help? I could give your parents death glares when you're gone."
A friend takes the blame for you.
A best friend screams, "She did it! She did it! I'm innocent!"
A friend asks you to take them for a ride in your new car and understands if you say no.
A best friend steals your keys and takes it for a joyride, and the police bring it back at midnight the next week looking like an eighty-year-old thing that was just pulled out of the Hudson.
A friend is happy for you if you're pregnant.
A best friend groans and asks, "Who's the unlucky parent then?"
A friend helps you when you fall.
A best friend rolls around laughing and trips you again.
A friend helps you find your way when you’re lost.
A best friend is the one putting magnets near your compass, stealing your map, and giving you wrong directions.
A friend helps you learn to drive.
A best friend helps you roll your car into the lake to collect the insurance.
A friend borrows your stuff and gives it back in a few days.
A best friend loses it and says, “My bad, here’s a tissue.”
A friend knocks on your door.
A best friend barges in and yells "I’M HOME!"
A friend will go to a concert with you.
A best friend will kidnap the band with you.
A friend asks for something to eat.
A best friend helps herself and is the reason you never have any food.
A friend asks you for your number.
A best friend asks you for her number.
A friend hides you from the cops.
A best friend is the reason they're after you in the first place.
A friend stops you from publicly making an idiot of yourself.
A best friend is up there making an idiot of herself with you.
Best Friends: Are 4 Ever
This is a poem that a couple girls in my cabin at camp wrote for chapel cuz our them was friendship.
The lines in bold are what one is saying, the lines in italiques are what the other is saying.
We are friends
You fall in a mud puddle
I jump in after you
You jump off a bridge
I will miss you
Really relevant where I live since people seem to love jumping off one of the really tall bridges over the river. Even after someone died doing it a couple years ago.
My fav quotes
I feel like pudding, pudding with nerve endings, pudding in great pain. -Iggy, Maximum Ride
I vill destroy the snickahs bahs!- Gazzy, SOF- Maximum Ride
Fang: Go pick a tree, I'll carve our initials into it!
Max: If you're not careful I'll carve something into you!- Fang and Max, Maximum Ride
They're taking the hobbits to Isenguard!- Legolas, Lord of the Rings (If you don't get it, type it into youtube)
Legolas: I feel a slight tingling in the tips of my fingers. I think it's affecting me!
Gimli*spilling beer down his beard* I told you! Can't hold his liquor!*goes crossed eyed and falls over backwards*-Legolas and Gimli- Lord of the Rings
Rules are just helpful guidelines for stupid people.-House
My precious!-Gohlum, Lord of the Rings
Of course it's all in your head! But why on earth should that mean that it isn't real?-Dumbldore, Harry Potter
Ron:It's not funny! I'm in love with her!
Harry: Alright you're in love with her! Have you ever actually met her?
Ron: No...Do you think you could introduce us?-Ron and Harry, Harry Potter
I think that Pastor Calvin is hot. That's about as far as my religious conviction goes.- Vee, hush,hush
I love to watch people cry when I crush they're dreams!-some contestant dude off of survivor
You're only as tall as your heart will let you be, and you're only as small as the world will let you seem.-On The Brightside by Nevershoutnever!
I have a sexually confused fish on facebook.-Brynja
Meg: He's 11!
Julie:No he's 14!
15! And that's my final offer!
Me:You guys do know that Alice isn't real, right? And you can't bet on an age!- My friends, Meg and Julie, fighting over the age of an LR character that we made up.
I have a hyperventilating hedgehog!-My friend Bryn(she actually does have a hyperventilating hedgehog)
Brynja: I thought that you said you didn't care!
Me: Yes, but then I threatened to kill you with a pencil. That would be your cue to stop.- Me and Bryn in socials class after Bryn drew on my notes.
I just thought of ten ways to kill you with a pencil.- Me before the quote above.
I'm your friend, I'm here to annoy you.-Brynja
Sam: You know, pudding is made out of bone marrow.
Meg and Julie: Ew.
Me*as I take a big bite of pudding* Great!-Sam, Julie, Meg and Me at lunch
NO! NOT THE ENCHANTED BUNNY!-Raj, the Big Bang Theory
Oh, I broke the internet.-Eric, NCIS Los Angeles
Gosh, guys are so cute with all the alpha male stuff! It's adorable!-Max, ANGEL (No joke, Max actually thinks this about Dylan and Fang un sarcastically, and not while under the influence of valium)
THIS IS SPARTA!!!!-The people in my group at Naarai Kir (we all stood on a bench on the street and screamed that as loud as we could)
How many yogurts did you eat?
How many are in a pack?
Then 24.-Aidan and Paz
I'm not a bitch! I'm a bastard!
I'm a bastard too!-Bridgit and Christine
Argument between Meg and Julie:
The moth is better than Legolas!
NO! Legolas is better!
Purple doesn't suit your complexion!(apparently this is the new insult of choice)
Go die in a hole with oriki!-At this point we had to pull them apart cuz it was during intermission at a concert and they were getting really loud.
Excuse me, where's Cowboy Coffee?-Alex(to the service guy at cowboy coffee)
'Now life has killed the dream I dreamed.'
Wow! That was a happy song!-Me at choir
Teacher: Why are you late?
Student:It will be in the gouvernment exam!
Student:\Well that's your excuse when you give us a ton of homework.- What we decided would happen if meg was late for maths.
I dunno where these are from:
People say that guns don't kill people, people kill people, but if you just stand there and yell "BAM!" you won't kill very many people. So guns help.
"Doctors say I have a multiple personality disorder. We disagree with that."
"A good girl is a bad girl who hasn't been caught."
"Flying is simple, just throw yourself at the floor and miss."
"That, my children, is called a wall. But beware the wall is solid. Yes be afraid! Be very afraid for we cannot walk through it! Believe me, children, for I have attempted this many times before."
"I'm a ninja."
"No you're not."
"Did you see that?
You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder
I am NOT saying your stupid...I'm just implying it.
Don't knock on death's door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that.
Yes, I hit like a girl. You could too if you hit a bit harder.
A stranger stabs you in the front; a friend stabs you in the back; a boyfriend stabs you in the heart, but best friends only poke each other with straws.
Come to the dark side. We have COOKIES!
To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first, and call whatever you hit the target.
Live dangerous…Run with scissor
There are all kinds of art. There's the art of drawing, the art of dancing, the art of science, and of course the refined art of being an idiot
You can't fix stupid.
I’m not saying you’re stupid, I’m just implying it.
SCREW HUGS! I'm gonna tackle you when I see you!
I'm not paranoid... WHICH ONE OF MY ENEMIES TOLD YOU THIS?
"Somone really old(whose dead), did someting really boring, a really long time ago." That's pretty much the juste of history.
Purple doesn't suit your complexion!
Your mother was a hampster!
Go die in a hole with oriki!
Justin Bieiber wants to meet you!
You are a sexually confused fish!
I will fart in your general direction!
QUESTIONS TO MAKE YOU THINK...
Cuz I can't sleep...
1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc)
2. Put it on shuffle
Opening Credits: Deceiver of Fools by Within Temptation (Wow, long opening. fyi, it's like a 7 minute song.)
Waking Up: Hundred by The Fray(Ironically that's the first song that came on when I got up this morning)
First Day At School: Beat It by Fallout Boy(someone's not happy to be going back)
Falling In Love: Saviour by Skillet (it fits...kinda)
Fight Song: Here we go again by Paramore(I would have picked this one for break up, but it could fit)
Breaking Up: piggy bank by Nevershoutnever!(apparently it was a bad relationship...this is a very happy song about love)
Prom night: Party Poison by My Chemical Romance(Awesome, it fits)
Life: Someday by Nickleback (fits)
Mental Breakdown: Turn it Off by Paramore (Perfect)
Driving: Over My Head by The Fray
Flashback: What If by SafetySuit (Ironic)
Getting back together: Disenchanted by My Chemical Romance(I LoVe this song)
Wedding: Mind Reader by VersaEmerge(interesting...)
Birth of Child: Lacrymosa by Evanescence(poor kid...)
Final Battle: 27 by Fallout Boy(odd)
Funeral Song: Ice Queen(acoustic version) by Within Temptation(haha! This is actually the song that I want played at my funeral!)
Final Credits: Sooner or Later by Breaking Benjamin(fitting, actually)
A teenage girl about 17 named Diane had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away.
(This is true God is always with you)
This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man buried her when she was still alive. The murderer chanted, "Toma SOta Balcu", as he buried her.Now that you have read the chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night, she will be on your ceiling. She will suffocate you like she was. If you post this on your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded. (Do it Hayley do it)
1) I NEED TO TELL YOU A SECRET (LO0K AT #5)
A father passing by his son's bedroom, was astonished to see that the bed was nicely made, and everything was picked up. Then, he saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow. It was addressed, 'Dad.'
With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the letter, with trembling hands.
I've been finding real passion with Stacy, and she is so nice, but I knew you would not approve of her, because of all her piercings, tattoos, her tight Motorcycle clothes, and because she is so much older than I am.
But it's not only the passion, Dad. She's pregnant.
Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for ourselves, and trading it with the other people in the commune, for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want.
In the meantime, we'll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS, so Stacy can get better. She sure deserves it!
Don't worry Dad, I'm 15, and I know how to take care of myself.
P.S. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Jason's house.
Call when it is safe for me to come home...
Copy and paste this onto your profile if you thought that it was hilarious!
I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that crap up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, "Oh, I'm sorry, I thought your paper would protect you."
Copy and paste this onto your profile if you're seriously considering doing that the next time you play rock,paper,scissors.
(\_/) PUT THIS ON YOUR PROFILE
(='.'=) This is Bunny.
HELP THE BUNNY!!!!
Kitty is Bunny's nemesis. Or evil accomplice. Nobody really knows.
Either way, copy and paste Kitty as well, or Bunny will get lonely!
95% Of teens Would be on edge if Robert Patterson were on the ledge of a tall building ready to jump, if you are 1 of the 5% who would yell "JUMP!!JUMP!!JUMP!!" while holding a camera, Copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you are SO obsessed with Maximum Ride that it is not even FUNNY anymore, post this in your profile.
If you or your best friend is insane cut and paste this on your profile.
If you ever fallen over laughing for no reason cut and paste this on your profile.
If you've ever cut and pasted cut and paste this on your profile.
65 percent of Teenagers spend more time watching TV rather then read, if you are part of the 35 percent who read more that watch TV then cut and paste this to your Profile.
If the voices actually DO talk to you, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you have ever loved some one that isn't real, copy paste this into your profile
If you think that bunnies are going to take over the world, copy paste this into your profile
If you have ever stayed up all night reading fanfiction, copy paste this into your profile
My friend's the kind of person that breaks the silence at a funeral by screaming "KUNG POW CHICKEN."
If you have ever done something stupid at school, copy paste this into your profile.
If you're hyper, like being hyper, and are hyper all the time, COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!
Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile.
Quesadillas are good. I like cheese. I have seen purple cows. If two gooses are geese, then why aren't two moose meese, or when two foots are feet, why aren't two footballs feetball? People call me crazy, but I'm just random! If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile!
My best friend is insane! If you agree, or if you have an insane friend, then copy this into your profile.(actually, me and all my fiends are insane!)
If you sometimes talk to yourself copy and paste this onto your profile
Copy and paste this into your profile if you and your BFFs watch movies just to laugh at them and make fun of them.
If you think that Writer's Block sucks, copy and paste this into your profile.
Paste this in your profile if you're a procrastination addict.(like 24/7! :-)
If you like smiley faces, then copy this into your profile:D
When life gives you lemons, make grapefruit juice, and let life wonder how the heck you did that!(or just keep 'em cause hey! they're free lemons)
If you hate those irritating mosquitoes giving you mosquito bites copy this in your profile
If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.
If you like chocolate as much as I do, copy this in your profile.(Total chocoholic!)
If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"?
Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?
If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you are a person who acts friendly but has an evil mind and is secretly plotting world domination, copy and paste this into your profile.
If someone actually thinks that you are evil and/or plotting their death, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.
I'm bored...If you're bored then paste this in your profile and let the world know you have nothing (better) to do... (ya, ff addicts have no life)
If you have ever laughed at something that you wouldn't normally laugh at because it was really late at night, copy this into your profile
If you've ever walked into a doorway that you could've clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.
If you or your best friend is insane copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you hate those obnoxious preppy people PLEASE copy this in your profile.
If you and your friends have a nickname, title, or anything else for each other, copy and paste this in your profile.
Even when you can’t see him GOD is there! If you believe in GOD put this in your profile.
nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile.
If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.
If keyboards hate you copy and paste this into your profile! (Especially the FREAKING CAPS LOCK!)
If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever tripped when there was a "watch your step" sign copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever ran into a mirror, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever run into a tree, copy this to your profile!
If you have ever been hit in the face with a ball and started laughing maniacally, copy and paste this into your profile.(the gym teacher thought I had a concusion!)
If you believe that preps travel in packs then place this on your profile.
If you hear voices in your head, copy and paste this onto your profile!
If you have ever slapped your self on the head and/or banged your head on a table for no reason put this on your profile.
If you have ever want to scream to the world that you hate/like someone copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy this into your profile.
If you are the kind of person that gets really excited when you get, like, two reviews, copy this into your profile.
If you think rock paper scissors solves everything then copy and paste this in your profile.
If you think duct tape can fix anything copy and paste this on you profile.
If you think that scissors can fix anything that duct tape can't copy and paste this on your profile.
If you have ever played CARROT LAMA ROCK copy and paste this on your profile
i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! if you can raed tihs cpoy and psate it in yuor pofrile
If you actually thought that some of the words that were longer than 3 letters were spelt correctly copy and past this into your profile.(because of dyslexia or you just really suck at spelling)
Good questions and random observations
Being a woman is a terribly difficult task, since it consists principally in dealing with men.
Growing old is mandatory...growing up is optional...
In school we learn that teenagers need more sleep than adults, yet school still starts at eight thirty in the morning.
whos cruel idea was it for lisp to have and s in it?
are children who act in 'R' rated films allowed to see them?
If the sky is the limit then what is space, over the limit??
If the swat team breaks down your door do they have to replace it later?
Isn't Disneyland just a people trap operated by a mouse?
Why are people so scared of mice, yet we all love Mickey Mouse?
Isn't it funny how the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli' meaning many, and 'tics' as in 'bloodsucking creatures'?
Why is it when we talk to God we are praying, but when God talks to us we are crazy?
Why is it when some products you have to turn upside down to read the directions, and the directions say do not turn down?
If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2?
If you can't drink and drive, why do bars have parking lots?
If you jog backwards, will you gain weight?
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
Since Americans throw rice at weddings, do Asians throw hamburgers?
If corn oil is made from corn, where do we get baby oil from?
If rabbits' feet are so lucky, then what happened to the rabbit?
If scientists were ever going to figure out how to travel through time, wouldn’t we now be seeing people from the future?
If our body temperature is normally 98.6 degrees, how come when it's 98 degrees outside, no one is comfortable?
Why is it the TWELVE days of Christmas when there is only one day of Christmas?
Since a running back runs forward, why is he called a running back?
Why is "number" abbreviated as "no"? When there is no "o" in number?
Why do we teach kids that violence is not the answer and then have them read about wars in school that solved America's problems?
Why is Donkey Kong called "DONKEY" Kong if he's a monkey?
If a bunch of cats jump on top of each other, is it still called a dog pile?
When a boy is named after his dad, he is called 'Junior,' but what do
If your name is Mr. Crunch, and you joined the Navy, would you eventually be Captain Crunch?
In India women-but not men- can marry goats
You can keep cows in a shed in the Northern territories, you can keep chickens in a shed but it's illegal to keep cows and chickens in the same shed.
Cigarettes are legal in Nicaragua, cigarette lighters aren't.
In Vancouver, BC the speed limit for tricycles is 10 miles per hour.
In China boxing is illegal (too brutal), capital punishment isn't.
If all of the Acme stuff doesn't work, why does Wile Coyote keep buying their products?
364 days of the year, parents tell their kids not to take candy from
Why is it when we laugh in school the teachers say do you find something funny? When obviously we do?
Why do people call it an ATM machine, but they know it's really saying Automated Teller Machine Machine?
Why do people say PIN number when that truly means Personal Identification Number Number?
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.
I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.
Do you have trouble making up your mind? Well, yes or no?
If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
Many people quit looking for work when they find a job.
When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded.
Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.
You know the speed of light, so what's the speed of dark?
Join The Army, Visit exotic places, meet strange people, then kill them.
I poured Spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone.
Evening news is where they begin with 'Good evening', and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.
Death is hereditary.
There are three sides to any argument: your side, my side and the right side.
There are four sides to a triangle: the right side, the left side, the bottom side, and the pointy side.
An consultant is someone who takes a subject you understand and makes it sound confusing.
Never argue with a fool. People might not know the difference.
When you're right, no one remembers. When you're wrong, no one forgets.
Cheer up, the worst is yet to come.
Everyone makes mistakes. The trick is to make mistakes when nobody is looking.
They say hard work never hurts anybody, but why take the chance?
Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.
I like work. It fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.
If you can't see the bright side of life, polish the dull side.
Where there's a will, there are five hundred relatives.
Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.
Bananas should be purple
I love the 'I can't beleive it's not butter'
THE LAMA SONG:
HAPPY LAMA, SAD LAMA, SUPER HAPPY SILLY LAMA
SUPER LAMA, DRAMA LAMA, BIG FAT MAMA LAMA
FISHIES, DEAD LAMA.
If you believe that fishies is a word copy and paste this on your profile.
If you think spectroheliokinomatograph is a word copy and paste this on your profile.
Some really funny things!
My friend put her paper on eye disorders in the middle of her ff story! (allreader-Julianna AKA:Julie or Jub-Jub)
My other friend is afraid alpacas but not lamas (Rajn Seafeather-Brynja AKA: Bryn)
I love french immersion but not french classs. (Verbes!*runs away screaming*)
I believe that poipel cows are real!
Another one of my friends spent like 2 minutes leaving a message on her mom's answering machine on my cell then realized that she hadn't pressed the dial button!(willow seafeather-Megan AKA: Meg or Nut Meg)
I have a picture of a giraff who died from eating a light bulb!
I just spent like 10 minutes trying to spell giraff! (I am soooooooooooo dyslexic)
The first rule of duct tape: Duct tape fixes everything, scissors fix everything that duct tape can't, everybody knows that except for the people who don't!
There is a national chocolate cupcake day! (October 18, wich just happens to be Nut Meg's birthday)
My birthday just happens to land on weed appreciation day! (March 28)
Please Read This Extremly Serious And Extremly Important Announcement With The extremly Long Header That Says Extremly Way Too Much, Regarding:
Writer's block is a very serious disease that can be contracte by any writer at any time. Writer's block does not discriminate against age, gender or race. Writer's block is very serious and must be treated immediately by writer's block specialists. Writer's block is also extremly contagious, so if you or someone you know have or have been exposed to writer's block you must see a specialist immediately.
Symptoms of writer's block:
Cravings for chocolate
Grouchiness (yes it is a word)
Tierdness(yes, also a word, well not according to spell check but whatever)
Lack of concentration or motivation
Frequently falling a sleep in class
Frequently getting caught falling asleep in class
Causes of writer's block:
In secure writers syndrom (ISWS)
Electronic, internet, fan fiction or book deprivation (AKA being grounded from: fan fiction, the internet, books (yes it seriously has happened) or electronic dvices)
Excessive overload of GISIT (ackronime for Grown-up Imposed yet Self Inflicted Torture, AKA homework (yes I did steal that from MR)
Although there is no real cure for writer's block, there are some ways that you can lessen the severity of the diseas and in some cases, make it dissapear all together.
Treatments for writer's block:
Get away from annoying siblings
Get away from annoying parents
Read a book
Go on fan fiction
Play a video game
Exercise/ play a sport
Make up excuses for not doing your homework
And...Oh ya! Eat chocolate!
Please share this, and inform people about the monstrous disease that is writer's block.
Foot Note: Foot notes serve absolutely no purpose.
Okay, so because I think that word problems for math in the text book that are supposed to apply to real life are stupid, I decided to make up my own!
If you climb mount Everest and you are attacked by a rabid polar bear you have a 50% chance of living. If you fall a sleep in french class and when your teacher catches you, they suddenly go crazy there is a 25% percent chance that your teacher will not kill you. If you walk into a dark room there is a 60% chance that there will be ninjas in that room, there fore you have a 40% chance of living. If all of these things happened to you what is the probability that you would live?
Answer: Your chances of living are 5%.
Okay so there's my defiance to math! If your learning about probability in math plz show this problem to your math class! And if all of this happens to you, good luck!
-Hello and welcome to the Mental Health Hot-line. If you are obsessive compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent ask someone to press 2 for you. If you have multiple personalities press 3, 4, 5, 6. If you are paranoid, we know what you are and what you want so stay on the line and we'll trace your call. If you are delusional press 7 and your call will be sent to the Mother Ship. If you are schizophrenic listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press. If you are depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, no one will answer you. If you are dislexic press 6, 9, 6, 9, 6, 9. If you have a nervous disorder fidget with the hatch key until the beep. After the beep, please wait for the beep. If you have short term memory loss, please try your call again later and if you have low self esteem, hang up; all our operators are too busy to talk to you.
HOMOPHOBIA IS GAY
I am the boy who never finished school because I was called a fag every day.
I am the girl who got kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I was a lesbian.
I am the prostitute working the streets because no one will hire a transsexual.
I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.
We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.
I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they wouldn't allow my partner of 27 years into the room.
I am the foster child who wakes up to the nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me.
I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before my high school graduation. It was just too much to bear.
We are the couple who had the Realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one bedroom for two men.
I am the one person who does not know which bathroom to use so the management doesn't come for me.
I am the mother who is not even allowed to see the children I bore, nursed and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.
I am the father who never hugged my son because I grew up afraid to show affection to males.
I am the Home Ec teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians could teach it.
I am the woman who died when the EMTs stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.
I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed the doors to my kind. (Sadly true in some cases, but one of the ministers at my church is gay so not everywhere)
I am the girl ashamed to tell my own friends that I am a lesbian because they make fun of them.
I am the boy tied to a fence, beaten to a bloody pulp and left to die because two straight men said they needed to 'teach me a lesson'.
I am the person who needs to hide what this world needs the most: love.
Seriously, people. Gay people are just like everyone else; they want love. But because minorities are discriminated, they are usually unable to find it. I have gay friends. I have friends with gay parents. I know gay people. It's not like they act differently or think differently than anyone else; is it really so bad to love someone?
IF YOU BELIEVE THAT HOMOPHOBIA IS WRONG- REPOST THIS
IF YOU IGNORE THIS WITHOUT READING IT YOU HAVE NO HEART...BUT IF YOU FIND YOU CANNOT STOP UNTIL YOU REACH THE END THEN YOU MUST HAVE A VERY BIG HEART.
Mom...Johnny brought a gun to school
The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...
Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Yavie Aelinel, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Shadow929, The Astrology Nerd, brown-eyed angelofmusic, piratesswriter/fairy to be, The Gypsy-Pirate Queen Teetering On The Brink Of Insanity Past The Point Of No Return ManLife Sucks, Avatarwolf lilly1542, Itachifanchick, Silver-Arrow-Kitsune-Girl, Dark Wolf on a full Blood, Xx-Erin-xX-AthrunxCagallifan, Laurel Ale, Maia Sky
I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cell phone or regular phone. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with like a thousand different books, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things. Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone: Iheartjake, TeamJacob101, Boysareadrag, The Dawn Is Breaking, twilite addict, The Lonely Teenager, AliceDaSpaz, Skittle.Rocke, Silent_Broken_Heart, St. Fang of Boredom, flyaway111, Faith Everdeen, Maia Sky