Author has written 15 stories for Fallout, Guardians of Ga'Hoole, X-overs, Pokémon, Halo, Crackdown, and Elder Scroll series.
"Leave the world better than you found it." Chubs34
(Looks up from book) Why hello there! How did you get in my house? I'm Chubs34, but you can just call me Chubs!
(Who I am)
I am a 6'5 guy, with a sturdy build, broad shoulders, so has a relatively intimidating appearance. My face is perpetually scowled due to years of dissapointment, giving me a generally menacing look. Don't be turned down, I'm a fun guy when I know you as a friend. I'm incredibly fun, making jokes, most of which dirty, and very supportive, freindly, and protective of my friends. I love video games, shooters in general, and writing/reading on this site. I lolled around for a year after I discovered this site, and just now made an account. My legs are downright sexy.
I have loaded three juggernaut stories. They are The Passionate Assassin and the Honorable Leader, Forgiven?, and Avenging an Angel. I have just about caught lightning in a bottle with the first, probably started a new sub-genre with the second, and amazed with the latter of the three, and hope to continue amazing for as long as the electricity from the lightning holds up.
You heard the phrase: "I do my own stunts"? Well, I write my stuff on the Document manager, so I spell check myself. Yeah, that's how men do it. Screw spell cheker!
I will take requests, but I like them to be strange. Look at my stories. The Passionate Assassin and the Honorable Leader has an OC, which isn't uncommon, but is in a relationship with Soren, which isn't all too rare, but the way I portray it is. In Forgiven? It has LW and Amata hooking up, but LW may not forgive her. Read if you want to know if he does. In Avenging an Angel, the main charachter is Piplup and it's evolutions. There are literally none others. Try it. Put in all genres, all ratings, and charachter A as Piplup/ Prinplup/ Empoleon. Okay, there are a lot, but none worthwhile.
I only do two stories at a time, and have a thrid document file for changes on my chapters. I have many ideas for stories.
I will not, however, do anything associated with Twilight, unless in the most deragatory terms. If you do, then I will have the Brotherhood of Steel Paladin running from an explosion in the picture to the left hunt you down and crush your pathetic skull in with his massive boot, set your corpse on fire, then vaporize the remains with his laser rifle, then give the ashes as makeup for Justin Beiber. Don't test me.
I enjoy a good romance story, or hurt/comfort, or really anything that has a charachter going through turmoil.
I try to be as fluent as possible in my stories. I am sorry if there are any mistakes, I will try to fix them if I can. This may also affect the rate that chapters are uploaded. Please be patient, it will be worth the wait. I promise. By, the way I don't care about flames, so incinerate me!
13Slasher13, HollowHead95, Waterinthedark
My advice to a new person who writes:
1: Make one or two more document file then you need. Leave those for editing chapters.
2: Write only two stories at a time. You get a good mix up, and not overwhelmed.
3: Make sure your writing is correct.
4: Have a signature on your writings. Mine is: Chubs out.
5: Read. You will be inspired.
6: Always write what your interested in. I re-read my own stories, not because I'm looking for flaws, but because I wrote about what I wanted to see in a story. That's why I wrote all three, excluding the two other Fallout ones. Because that's a story I wanted to read.
If you are here from my "The Passionate Assasin and the Honorable Leader" Story, do not check out my other stories. DO NOT! It will change your life! I swear it! Ok, well maybe "Forgiven?" is fine, but don't read "Avenging an Angel" Trust me.
Monsters and Messiahs
Al Sorenson: You know who.
Bright-Eye: Sniper, very sharp with a rifle. Initally stoic, but Al corrupts him with humor. Was born into Legion, but was made a slave due to an incident he prefers not to dicuss. His master was Trypticus. Al's very best friend.
Trypticus: Legion Centurion. A complete tank. Can wrestle a Deathclaw and win. That's we know through romurs. We couldn't interview him. He rufeses to cooperate with inferior beings.
Courier in Progress.
(Title and summary in prgress): Amata and the Enclave guy. 'Nuff said.
Harkin: The Enclave soldier.
Kensai: A very well trained man. Excellent at stealth, a crack shot, and he has no remorse. But is willing to stop the Enclave. Why?
(Halo Story):Craig Cogburn and his time on the Spirit of Fire.
Lanjar Snow-Thrower: Nord. Uses greatsword and heavy armor. Is the Dovahkiin.
Ni'aava: Argonian mage. Female. Naive and inexpierienced.
Dar'Aska: Khajiit. Thief. He's in it for the gold. And following around an adventurer is a good way to get gold.
If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.
If you are obsessed with fan fiction copy this into your profile.
Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. Copy this into your profile if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "where to begin?"
93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?" Put this on your profile.
92 percent of American teens would die if Abercombieand Fitch told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy this in your profile if you would be the 8 percent that would be laughing your ass off.
If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.
95 of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the 5 who aren't, copy this into your profile.
92 percent of the teenage population would die if Abercrombie and Fitch said it wasn't cool to breathe anymore. Put this in your profile if you're part of the 8 percent that would be laughing their ass off.
If you think that writing Fanfic stories is fun then copy this onto your profile!
If you love the music you listen to, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have a story in your head, copy and paste this into your profile
If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile.
There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile.
98 percent of authors confuse "You're" and "Your", or "It's" or "Its". If you're one of the 2 percent who knows how to tell them apart, copy and paste this into your profile.
1% of the authors will pause after typing a sentence if it has "You're" or "Your" in it, just to make sure it's right. Copy and paste onto your if you've ever done that.
If you read your own stories or profile just for the heck of it, or if you write about stuff that you want to read, copy and paste this to your profile
If you've ever wondered what it was like in another dimension, copy this onto your profile.
If you think the human identification thing when you log onto fan fiction is slightly annoying sometimes, copy this onto your profile.
If you've ever wondered who made up all these copy and paste things, copy this onto your profile.
If fan fiction is to you what MySpace is to other people, copy this onto your profile.
If your profile is a never-ending state of change, copy this onto your profile.
1F YOU C4N UND3R574ND 7H15 M355463, COPY 4ND P4573 17 1N70 YOUR PROF1L3.
If you and your friends have a nickname, title, or anything else for each other, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile. Past four can do as well.
If you are one of the few teens who don't have or want to have a myspace, facebook, or twitter copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have siblings that drive you crazy then copy this onto your profile.
If you keep a list of one liners to use in your stories, copy and paste to your profile.
Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are unconcerned by the dismal state of their education, or the fact that their fanfiction is raping the English language. If you're part of the five percent of fanfiction writers/readers who do care about such things, cut and paste this, and then leave reviews for those poor souls who know not what they are doing.
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door
- Chuck Norris banged a mermaid…nine months later, Michael Phelps was born
- Chuck Norris spit on a semi truck. It is now known as Optimus Prime.
- Chuck Norris was born May 6, 1945. The Nazis surrendered on May 7, 1945. Coincidence? I think not.
- The game of chess orginally had a piece called the Chuck Norris. It was removed because in one move, it can kill all pawns, knights, and brooks, remove the bishop of his title, de-throne the king, and get the queen pregnant.
- Chuck Norris is the reason Waldo is hiding.
- Once death had a near Chuck Norris experience.
- The world’s top scientists are in debate. Some say that, since only one Chuck Norris exists, he should be put on the endangered species list. Most say that, since one Chuck Norris exists, the rest of the world should be put on the endangered species list.
- Chuck Norris can get McDonald’s for breakfast after 11. At Taco Bell.
- Yoda was picked from Chuck Norris’s nose.
- Chuck Norris knows the Krabby Patty formula
- Chuck Norris once fought Superman; the loser had to wear his underwear on the outside of his pants.
- Chuck Norris is the leading cause of death. Death is number two.
- Someone bet Chuck Norris once that he couldn’t spit over the entire ceiling of a church…Michaelangelo STILL owes him ten bucks.
- On Father’s Day, send Chuck Norris a card…just in case.
- The Spartans were the first official Chuck Norris cheerleading team.
- In the 1950’s, Chuck Norris banged an entire covenant of nuns, who later gave birth the 1975 Miami Dolphins, the only undefeated team in NFL history.
- Superman was Chuck Norris for Halloween.
- Mike Tyson’s face tattoo and Chuck Norris’s shoe have the same pattern.
- Aliens exist, but are smart enough to leave Chuck Norris’s planet alone.
- Remember when the T-Rex was chasing the Jeep in Jurassic Park? Well, in reality Chuck Norris was chasing both the T-Rex and the Jeep.
- Most people fear the Grim Reaper; Chuck Norris sees him as a “promising rookie"
I'd do this for her
1-touch her waist
2-talk to her
4-give her your jacket
5-kiss her slowly and touch her face.
Are you remembering this?
8-laugh with her
9-invite her somewhere
10-let her be with you when you're with your friends
11-smile with her
12-take pics with her
13-pull her onto your lap
14-when she says she loves you more, deny it. fight back
15-when her friends say i love her more than you, deny it.
Are you thinking about someone?
16-always hug her and say "i love you" when you see her
17-kiss her unexpectedly
18-HUG HER FROM BEHIND AROUND THE WAIST
19- NEVER ignore her.
20-tell her the way you feel about her!
Oh, and on that last one... u need to show her you mean it too
21-kiss her on the lips
22-Tell her she means everything to you
23-tell her what feels good
24-make her feel loved
25-kiss her in front of other girls you know
26-don't lie to her
27-dont cheat on her
28-take her anywhere she wants
29-instant message or call her in the morning and tell her have a good day at school, and how much you miss her
30-be there for her when ever she needs you, & even when she doesn't need you, just be there so she'll know that she can always count on you
Are you still reading this? You better be, its important
31. Hold her close when she's cold so she can hold you too.
32. When you are alone hold her close and kiss her.
33. Kiss her on the cheek (it will give her the hint that you want to kiss her).
34. While in the movie, put your arm around her and then she will automatically put her head on your shoulder, then lean in and tilt her chin up and kiss her lightly.
35. Dont ever tell her to leave even jokingly or act like you're mad. If shes upset, comfort her
Remember this next time you are with her
36. when people diss her, stand up for her. take her side no matter what.
37. Look deep into her eyes and tell her you love her. (if you mean it)
38. Lay down under the stars and put her head on your chest so she can listen to the steady beat of your heart, Link your fingers together while you whisper to her as she rests her eyes and listens to you.
39. When walking next to each other grab her hand.
40. When you hug her hold her in your arms as long as possible
MAKE SURE SHE KNOWS SHE'S LOVED
41. Call her at night to wish her sweet dreams.
42. Comfort her when she cries and wipe away her tears. 43. Take her for long walks at night. (she'll feel safe, if you put your arms around her.)
44. Always Remind her how much you love her.
Youll never know when she needs just a lil more love
Repost this in 20 sec. or you will lose the one you care about the most!! Guys Repost: "i would do this for her"
Girls Repost: 44 things a girl would die for
that I bought you roses to tell you that I like you
That I was raised with respect and not to sleep with you when you were drunk
That my body's not ripped enough to "satisfy" your wants
that I open your car door and pull out your chair like I was raised
That I'm not cute enough to be "your guy"
That I am actually nice and not a jerk
I don't have a huge bank account to buy you expensive things
I like to spend quality nights at home cuddling with you, instead of at a club
I would rather make love to you then just screw you like some random guy.
That I am always the one you need to talk to, but never good enough to date
That I always held your hair back when you threw up, and didn't get mad at you for puking in my car, but when we went out you went home with another guy
That I am there to pick you up at 4am when your new man hit you and dropped you off in the middle of nowhere, but not good enough to listen to me when I need a friend
If I start not being there because it hurts being used as a door mat, only to be thrown to the side when the new jerk comes around
If I don't answer my phone anymore when you call, to listen to you cry for hours, instead of getting a couple hours of sleep before work
that you can't realize.. I've been the one all along.
If you read this and know somebody like this but you just don't fucking care
But most of all
For not being sorry anymore
That you can't accept me for who I am
I can never do anything right, and nothing that I do is good enough to make it in your world.
I caught your boyfriend with another girl and told you about it, I thought that was what friends were for...
That I told you I loved you and actually meant it.
That I talked to you for nine hours on Thanksgiving when your boyfriend was threatening you instead of spending time with my family.
That I cared
that I listen to you at night talking about how you wish you could have done something different.
Ladies/ always complain and gripe to their friends that there is never any good guys out there, and they always end up with assholes who mistreat them. Well ladies, next time you're complaining, maybe look up to see who you're complaining to, maybe that special someone is right there hanging on your every word as usual, screaming in his head "Why won't you give me a chance?"
Because the person you are usually searching for is right by you.
If you're a guy and you agree with this letter, copy and paste into your profile as 'I'm sorry'
If You're one of the FEW girls with enough BALLS to copy and paste this into your profile, and you would never make your guy feel this way, copy and paste into your profile as 'Girls Don't Realize These Things'
This is a real story.
A 16 year old teenager was RAPED. She later learned that she was pregnant with her rapist's child. She wanted an abortion, but her father, a die-hard christian, refused, saying it was her fault she was raped, and it was god's way of punishing her. Or, she was impregnated by a friend, and had the baby without the father, who ran away, if you can call someone like that a father.
She had the baby of a RAPIST, and her grades dropped drastically, as well as her mental condition, physical health, and her happiness. She later killed herself, both due to her father's spite and the stress of being a single, teenae mother, and her bastard child went on to impregnate YET ANOTHER 16 year old, then ran away, as to not deal with the child, thereby restarting the cycle.
If you think abortion is okay in certain circumstances, copy and paste this to your profile. IN CERTAIN SITUATIONS! PER SE: BEING RAPED! But if you don't want the child, then you should've used protection, or PULLED THE FUCK OUT. SERIOUSLY. IT'S NOT THAT DIFFERENT.
Religon is a method of controlling a population. It made an eternal life, just to scare kids. IT made sins to keep people in line. Theocracies are bound to fail. "Good" Cristians are fanatics who can't stand other religons, when it plainly says that you should be accpetant of others. IF you think religon if a load of BS, copy and paste to your profile.
If you are a person who knows what a best friend truly is, or not, read on anyway. A best friend is a person that you share many interests with. That's the definition. The reality is that a best friend is a person that, if you were the opposite gender as they were, you would bang them. A person who you accept for who he is, and he does the same. A person that you can walk down a street waving and smiling at cars like a retard, and he'll laugh with you. If you have a person like this, copy and paste to your profile. If you know any other ways, add them on.
If you are a person who values the QUALITY of your freinds over the QUANTITY of them, copy and paste to your profile.
(From Nigella00(PS: Thanks for letting people know about me(If you're here from her), if they have the patience to cross your profile. It means alot.))
A girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle
Girl: Slow down, I'm scared!
Guy: No, this is fun.
Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.
Guy: Then tell me you love me.
Girl: I love you, now slow down!
Guy: Now give me a big hug.
She gives him a big hug
Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me.
In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she could live.
If you would do this for a loved one copy and paste.
Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?
Girl: Do you like me?
Girl: Do you want me?
Girl: Would you cry if I left?
Girl: Would you live for me?
Girl: Would you do anything for me?
Girl: Choose--me or your life
Boy: My life
The girl runs away in shock and pain and the boy runs after her and says...
The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind.
The reason why I don't like you is because I love you.
The reason I don't want you is because I need you.
The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left.
The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you.
The reason why I'm not willing to do you anything for you is because I would do everything for you.
The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life.
Meanings of a kiss and a gesture
Kiss on the stomach = "I'm ready"
Kiss on the Forehead = "I hope we're together forever"
Kiss on the Ear = "You're my everything"
Kiss on the Cheek = "We're friends"
Kiss on the Hand = "I adore you"
Kiss on the Neck = "we belong together"
Kiss on the Shoulder = "I want you"
Kiss on the Lips = "I love you"
What the gesture means...
Holding Hands = "We definitely love each other"
Slap on the Butt = "That's mine"
Holding on tight = "I don't want to let go"
Looking into each other's Eyes = "I just plain love you"
Playing with Hair = "Tell me you love me"
Arms around the Waist = "I love you too much to let go"
Laughing while Kissing = "I am completely comfortable with you"
picking someone up off their feet = "That they love them fully and would do anything for them"
Take your time and see if you can read each line aloud without a mistake. The average person can't.
this is this cat
this is is cat
this is how cat
this is to cat
this is keep cat
this is a cat
this is retard cat
this is busy cat
this is for cat
this is forty cat
this is seconds can
Now go back and read the THIRD word in each line from the top down and I bet you can't resist passing it on.
40 Things To Do In An Elevator
1. Crack open your briefcase or handbag, peer inside, and ask, "Got enough air in there?"
2. Stand silent and motionless in one corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
3. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to open the doors, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open by themselves.
4. Greet everyone with a warm handshake and ask them all to call you Admiral.
5. Meow occasionally.
6. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM!" and back away slowly.
7. Say "DING!" at every floor.
8. Say "I wonder what all these do?" and push all the red buttons.
9. Make explosion noises whenever someone else presses a button.
10. Stare, grinning, at another person for a while, then say, "I have new socks on."
11.When the elevator is silent, look around and ask, "Is that your beeper?"
12. Try to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13. Draw a little square with chalk on the floor then say to the other passengers, "This is my personal space."
14. When there's only one other person on the elevator, tap them on the shoulder then pretend it wasn't you.
15. As you are coming to the end of the journey, get emotional and have a group hug with the other passengers. Tell them that you will never forget them.
16. Ask if you can push the buttons for other people, but push the wrong ones.
17. Hold the doors open and say that you're waiting for a friend. After a while, let the doors close and say, "Hi, Greg. How's your day been?"
18. Drop a pen and wait until someone bends to pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!"
19. Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
20. Pretend that you're a flight attendant, and review emergency exits with the other passengers.
21. Swat at flies that don't exist.
22. Yell, "Group hug!", then enforce it.
23. Make race car noises when someone gets on or off.
24. Congratulate all for being in the same lift as you.
25. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering, "Shut up, all of you just shut UP!"
26. Walk in with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
27. While the doors are opening, hurriedly whisper, "Hide it...quick!", then whistle innocently.
28. Let your cell phone ring--don't answer it.
29. Walk into the lift and say, "This reminds me of being buried alive. Ah, those were the days..."
30. Take shoes off before entering. Then look shocked and disgusted when others don't.
31. Ask people which floor they want, then say, "Is that your final answer?"
32. Also in your bellboy act, ask people what floor they want. Whenever they answer, give them a glare and say, "You should be ashamed of yourself!"
33. Ask loudly, "Did you feel that?"
34. Tell different people that you can see their aura.
35. When the door closes, announce to the others, "It's okay. Don't panic, they open up again."
36. Announce in a demonic voice, "I must find a more suitable host body."
37. Start breathing heavily and grab your chest when someone walks in. Then stumble out gasping for air.
38. If you are the only one in the lift, press all the buttons then stand and stare at the door, waiting for someone to come in.
39. If someone looks at you, laugh maniacally and tell them that you're there for the mental health convention.
40. Dress up in a long black cloak with a hood, stare at everyone, and in a deep voice announce: "It is time..."
I Have A Few Questions . . .
If you have sex with a prostitute against her will, is it considered rape or shoplifting?
Can you cry under water?
How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
Why do you have to 'put your two cents in'... but it's only a 'penny for your thoughts'? Where's that extra penny going to?
Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
What disease did cured ham actually have?
How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
Why is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when babies wake up like every two hours?
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.
Why is 'bra' singular and 'panties' plural?
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ?
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune? Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
Do stairs go up or down?
Do coffins have lifetime guarantees?
When French people swear do they say “Pardon my English?”
Why does the last piece of ice always stick to the bottom of the cup?
Why do they put Braille on the drive through bank machines?
If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?
If a person with Multiple Personality Disorder threatens to kill themselves, is it considered a hostage situation?
These are actual instruction labels from certain comsumer goods...
On Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping
(Gee, that's the only time I have to fix my hair!)
On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special!)
On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap
(And that would be...how?)
On some Swann TV dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost
(But that's just a suggestion, of course)
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert:
(printed on bottom of box)
Do not turn upside down.
(Too late; you lose!)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
(Seriously? Let's experiment!)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
(But wouldn't that save time? And whose body, exactly?)
On Boot's Children's Cough Medicine:
Do not drive or operate machinery.
(We could really do a lot to reduce construction accidents if we would keep the 5-year-olds off the fork lifts)
On Nytol sleep aid:
Warning: May cause drowsiness
(One can only hope)
On Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: Keep out of children.
(Hmmm, something must have gotten lost in the translation...)
On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
(Yeah, as opposed to using it in outer space)
On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
(Now I'm really curious)
On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: Contains nuts
(But no peas?)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts.
(I wonder who thought that one up)
On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
(Raise your hand if you've tried this)
On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garmet does not enable flight.
(Oh, go ahead! That's right, destroying a universal childhood belief!)
This is weird, but interesting! If you can raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too. Cna yuo raed tihs? Olny 55 plepoe out of 100 can I'm one of them. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed erveylteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!Paste this to your profile if you can read this!
"If you think that nothing is impossible, then you've obviously never tried slamming a revolving door."
"2 wrongs don't make a right; 3 wrongs do."
"I don’t suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it."
"I'm a paranoid apathiest. I know someones out to get me and I just don't care."
"If the world was a stage, I'd want to be the one operating the trap door."
"I wonder why people say 'life is so short?' when life is the longest thing that you will ever experience?"
"An optimist is someone who falls off the Empire State Building, and after 50 floors says, 'So far so good!' "
"You can't have everything... where would you put it?"
"Travel to exotic places, see new things, meet more people and make more friends... then kill them."
"A consultant is someone who takes a subject you understand and make it sound confusing."
"Never go to sleep with a grudge... plot your revenge!"
"If curiosity killed the cat, then what about it's other lives?"
"Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to hide the bodies of the people I killed because they were annoying."
"Here's to you and here's to me, and I hope we never disagree. But, if we do, then to HELL with you, here's to ME!"
"Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them, and you have their shoes."
"I've not failed. I've just found thousand ways that don't work."
"According to the latest figures, 43 percent of all statistics are utterly worthless."
"Don't steal. The government hates the competition."
"Tell the truth and run."
"Smile! It makes them wonder what you're up to."
"Friends come, and friends go, but enemies accumulate."
"Truth is stranger than fiction, because fiction has to make sense.."
"Power corrupts. Absolute power is kind of neat."
"Generally, generalizations are wrong."
"Ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make ye mad."
"All things considered, insanity may be the only reasonable alternative."
"If we knew what we were doing, it wouldn't be research."
"The Truth is out there. So what are you doing here?"
"If you can't beat them, join them. Then take over."
"Whatever you are, be a good one."
"You cannot shake hands with a clenched fist."
"You can never underestimate the stupidity of the general public."
"Freedom is the right to be wrong, not the right to do wrong."
"The difficulty is not so great as to die for a friend, as to find a friend worth dying for."
"If you try to fail and succeed, what have you done?"
"Enjoy every minute of life. There's plenty of time to be dead."
"And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count, it's the life in your years."
"We don't live in the world of reality, we live in the world of how we percieve reality."
"If God had intended Man to smoke, he would have set him on fire."
"A single death is a tragedy. A million deaths is a statistic."
"Have the courage to live. Anyone can die."
"Education is important. School, however, is another matter."
"When a finger points at the moon, the imbecile looks at the finger."
"Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to change it every 2 months."
Friends vs best friends (Dedicated to my bro, K-Z, and Hollowhead. You guys fucking rock! (Copy/paste on yours and put the names of yuor freinds on what sounds like them!)
Friend: Will help me find my way when I'm lost
Best Friend: Will be the one messing with my compass, stealing my map and giving me bad directions. (I expect this from both of you...)
Friend: Will help me learn to drive
Best Friend: Will help me roll the car into the lake so I can collect insurance(K-Z, this is you. Maybe Hollowhead.)
Friend: Will watch my pets when I go away
Best Friend: Won't let me go away. (Hollowhead, this is so you.)
Friend: Will go to a concert with me
Best Friend: Will kidnap the band with me. (K-Z all the way.)
Friend: Calls my parents "Mr." or "Mrs."
Best Friend: Calls my parents "Mom" or "Dad"(Hollowhead)
Friend: Asks me for my number
Best friend: Asks me for his number.(K-Z)
Friend: Hides me from the cops
Best Friend: is probably the reason they are after me in the first place. (Both of you crazy assholes, but Hollowhead more. Please don't try and prove anything.)
Friend: lets me make an idiot of myself in public.
Best Friend: Is up there with me making an idiot out of himself too.(Both of you guys. We'd be having the time of our lives.)
FRIENDS: Will comfort you when she rejects you.
BEST FRIENDS: Will go up and ask him, "It's because you're a lesbian, isn't it?"(K-Z totally. Hollow would just threaten to kill her.)
FRIENDS: Will be there for you when she breaks up with you.
BEST FRIENDS: Will call her up and whisper, "Seven days, bitch..."(Both of you are that sadistic. But K-Z'd pull it off. Hollow would laugh.(
FRIENDS: Helps you up when you fall.
BEST FRIENDS: Keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, dumb ass?"(Hollow)
FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying.
BEST FRIENDS: Will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, Loser!"(K-Z isn't that much of a douche.)
FRIENDS: Will offer you a soda.
BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you.(K-Z, though only in a joke, not actually pour it on.)
FRIENDS: Will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month.
BEST FRIENDS: Will throw you a tampon and push you in.(...niether...)
FRIENDS: Gives you their umbrella in the rain.
BEST FRIENDS: Takes yours and says, "Run BITCH Run!"(Both of you.)
FRIENDS: Will help you move.
BEST FRIENDS: Will help you move the bodies.(Hollowhead. Period.)
FRIENDS: Will bail you out of jail.
BEST FRIENDS: Would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"(Both of you'd be in there with me.)
FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.
BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.(Hollowhead.)
FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.
BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore.(Both of you guys. You're just that awesome.)
FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.
BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.(Hollowhead. K-Z prefers to talk in person. Just to shove his foot up someone's ass there and then.)
FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.
BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."(K-Z)
FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.
BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...(Hollowhead...)
FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you.(Hollowhead)
FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."(Hollowhead)
FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.
BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.(Both)
FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college. (aka: drinking buddies)
BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.(Fuck yeah.)
FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough.
BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say "Dude! Drink the rest of that! You know we don't waste! CHUG, CHUG, CHUG!"(They promised on this one...)
Friends: Will ask you to be their wingman.
Best friends: Will get your ass laid, TONIGHT.(They'd do it.)
20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity
1. At Lunch Time , Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.
4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label it " In".\
5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.
6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks , Write "For Smuggling Diamonds".
7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy".\
8. Don't use any punctuation.
9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.
10. Order a Diet Water when ever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go".
12. Sing Along At The Opera.
13. Go To A Poetry Recital. And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme?
14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and Play tropical Sounds All Day.
15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In the Mood.
16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.
17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won! I Won!"
18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!"
19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."
20. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity.
HATE PEOPLE WHO ARE DIFFERENT? CONSIDER THE FOLLOWING:
It's the same story everyday: A girl in dark colors gets off the worst bus you can imagine, you know, the one with all the dumber-than-dirt country kids who are swearing every five words, listening to a punk rock/gothic rock/heavy metal/or any other dark music. She shuts off the cd player/MP3/ipod and walks into the school. You and your friends are standing inside because you're too wussy to stand outside in LATE MAY in you pretty new Capri pants and new Hollister t-shirt.
You point at her and whisper to your friends about how out-of-touch she is because she's dressed in a baggy hooded sweatshirt and frayed old jeans and she's maintaining a 3.785-4.0 GPA on a 4.0 scale while you're boardline failing. You loudly insult her and talk to her in an obnoxious voice. She just keeps her head down and shuffles right by.
You laugh loudly and say, "How could you have gotten that one wrong? Even a fifth grader knows that!" when she answers a question wrong in class. You and friends push her around in the hallways and trip her in the stairwells. You think she should start drooling over the boys at school and should wear the same clothes you do.
And yet, no matter what you do, she doesn't say anything.
Isn't it hilarious that she can be quiet all week, but still have to put up with more shit than the whore giving out free blowjobs on the bus? ISN'T IT FUNNY that you don't mind fucking a random guy every night, but you go around ripping on her just because she studies in the library every night? Isn't it just bloody fucking hilarious that she needs to sign a pass to the bathroom just to run into an empty classroom to cry at least once a week?
Are you laughing yet?
HAVE YOU EVER CONSIDERED WHAT HER LIFE IS LIKE?
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU GO UP TO HER FACE AND TRASH HER GOOD NAME, CALLING HER A 'FREAKY GOTH WANNABE' OR A 'WEEPY-WASHY ATTENTION SEEKER', AND NOT ONCE STOP AT ALL TO CONSIDER WHY YOU NEVER SEE HER PARENTS AROUND, OR WHY SHE ALWAYS WEARS LONG SLEEVES, EVEN IN THE SUMMER?
This is a true story. All schools have a class clown, someone that gets on everyones nerves and that no one likes. There was one of these boys in this one school. Nobody liked him at all. He had no friends, the teachers hated him for his disruptiveness, and the students found him annoying beyond belief. He never seemed to care. One day, he had finally stepped on his teachers last nerve. What the teacher did was make everyone in the class stand up and tell the boy something they didn't like about him. As each of the thirty students stood up and said something about him they didn't like, he only sat and didn't seem to mind. All of the students did it.
That day, when school was out, the boy went home, grabbed his dads gun, and shot himself in the head.
If you think that the teacher was to blame, and that what she did was morally wrong and completely shameful, copy and paste this into your profile. Then, if you would have been the one to stand up and say "I'm not going to do this" then add your username to the list.
Antire5, EmoWolves of Shadow, Killercat-nya, Juura99, demon-in-training, NRZWolf 13, Nigella00, Chubs34
Your One and Only Wish
Do it one by one, don't look ahead!
1. Write the name of a person of the opposite gender. Shannon.
2. Which is your favorite color out of red, black, blue, green, yellow? Blue.
3. Your first initial? A
4. Your month of birth? April.
5. Which color do you like more, black or white? Black
6. Name of a person of the same gender as yours. Austin.
7. Your favorite number? 666 I love hard rock.
8. Do you like California or Florida more? Florida.
9. Do you like the lake or the ocean more? Ocean
10. Write down a wish (a realistic one). Live in comfort, with friends and loved ones.
Are you done?
If so, scroll down
1. You are completely in love with this person. Nope, broke up with that bitch. Too many siblings, you hate your inlaws.
2. If you choose:
Red: You are alert and your life is full of love.
Black: You are conservative and aggressive.
Green: Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back.
Blue: You are spontaneous and love kisses and affection from the ones you love. Yeah, if I had any. D;
Yellow: You are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are down.
3. If your initial is:
A-K: You have a lot of love and friendships in your life. I hope so.
L-R: You try to enjoy life to the maximum and your love life is soon to
S-Z: You like to help others and your future love life looks very good.
4. If you were born in:
Jan.-Mar.: The year will go very well for you and you will discover that you fall in love with someone totally unexpected.
Apr.-June: You will have a strong love relationship that will not last long but the memories will last forever. All right!
July-Sept.: You will have a great year and will experience a major life changing experience for the good.
Oct.-Dec.: Your love life will not be too great, but eventually you will find your soulmate.
5. If you choose...
Black: Your life will take on a different direction, it will seem hard at the time. It better.
but will be the best thing for you, and you will be glad for the change.
White: You will have a friend who completely confides in you and would do
anything for you, but you may not realize it.
6. This person is your best friend. No shit, Sherlock!
7. This is how many close friends you have in a lifetime. Whoa!
8. If you choose...
California: You like adventure.
Florida: You are a laid-back person. Hmm. I would seem to like California more, then. Never been there though.
9. If you choose...
Lake: You are loyal to your friends and your love. And you are very reserved.
Ocean: You are spontaneous and like to please people. Yeah, so they get off my ass!
10. This wish will come true only if you RE-POST THIS BULLETIN in one hour and it will come true before your next birthday! YOU BETTER BE PSYCHIC!
(Yes, all of the above was from Nigella00(Who keeps it as "nigella00", but out of respect I capitalize. Or just my standards.))
(Worthwhile quotes (Idea from a person I saw that favorited my story))
"What is it?"
"Do you smell it?"
"He means the trap we just walked into."
-Al, Sarah, Gallows-Forgiven?
"What the hell is this thing doing?"
"Well, it's a baby Deathclaw, and that seems like the kind of thing that a baby does to it's mother."
"What are you implying?"
"It thinks your its mommy."
-Shannon and Sarah-Sentimental Sentinel
"Is that your armor or are you just happy to see me?"
-Al and Sarah-Broken Hearts of Steel
"Eyja...I love you and I want you to be my mate!"
"Soren... I can't."
"Why not? Are you...are you with an egg?"
"I'm a monster! There's an animal inside of me! You deserve better than me!"
"Eyja...I will always be with you. I will never, ever stop loving you."
-Soren and Eyja- The Passionate Assassin and the Honorable Leader
"Arceus-damn it! I thought I was above this, but I'm not! I've waited too long, lost too much! I hope Hell isn't too hot for you!"
Emp-Avenging an Angel
"Why didn't you kill me?"
"I realize now that killing you won't brind my father back...Get out of here.""When I finished that sentecne, that was your cue to high-tail your happy ass outta here!"
-Al and Colonel Autumn-Broken Hearts of Steel
"Hey, Sarah, before we go in, is my hand on fire?"
"What? No, God no!"
"Why would you ask that?"
"Well, I took some Phsyco before we left the Citadel."
"I thought it was a good idea!"
"How high are you?"
"I can see my house from here!"
-Al and Sarah-Broken Hearts of steel
"The enemy has an easily defensable base of operations, and we have an island that's attackable by any side. That puts the odd against us. These are desperate times. You and me? I guess we're the desperate measures."
-Eyja-The Passionate Assassin and the Honorable Leader
"God, please help me!"
"God? No God. Only man. Even if he was there, God can't save you from me!"
-Al and Colonel Autumn-Broken Hearts of Steel
"Does he need CPR? 'Cause I totally know CPR!"
-Brick-Broken Hearts of Steel
"I love it when you assert your dominance over me."
"I love to assert my dominance over you."
-Sarah and Al-Broken Hearts of Steel
"Area 51. Or up my drill seargent's ass. Could never figure it out."
-Sentinel- The Men Behind the Man
Sir, asshole, sir."
-Al and Sentinel- The Men Behind the Man
"Mind if you help me out with the Guide some? I have to go to a fucking minefield to do some research."
"With my luck? We'll blow up a car with one mine and kill us both?"
"Your luck? I got kicked out of the one place I called home, had to gather one hundred caps to bribe soem old asshole, and then met a drill seargeant. I say, one of us will get blown up, trip the rest of them, and the other can just pick up what's left."
"Why not? Hey, but if I die, give me a good burial, ok?"
"Don't worry, I'll pick the best sand to kick over your corpse."
"Just for that, if you die, I'm gonna put your body into a stupid pose."
-Al and Sentinel- The Men Behind the Man
"Hey! Quit wasting water!"
"Is it really that much of a problem? Can't they just get fixed?"
"Yeah, but that costs caps. And if they had caps, then they'd buy clean water. But they don't, so they have to drink that irradiated crap. There's some out there who can't drink because their bodies can't handle anymore radiation."
"Whatever, fuck you..."
"What? Freezer burn? Jeez, a potty mouth. And you seemed like such a n-ice guy!"
"Seriously? Fucking seriously? When did you become Mr. Freeze?"
"Hey, hey, hey! Stay cool."
"How many more of these you got?"
"A whole week's worth."
"Are you gonna use them for the rest of the walk?"
"If you get up now, I promise not to."
"Man, where's a vertibird when you need it?"
-Al and Sentinel- The Men Behind the Man
"So you're a real knight in shining armor right?"
"No. That's more your thing. I'm actually none too friendly around wastelanders."
"You just told me your life story, and you're 'none too friendly' to strangers?"
"Well, you did just save my life like thirty minutes back. And you're a Regulator. Ooh, and there's one more thing! Oh, what could it be? That's it! You're the Lone Fucking Wanderer. You're like the most trustworthy guy around!"
-Al and Dante Broaden- The Men Behind the Man
"It's not the answer I expected out of you, Al. I had atleast hoped he'd forced you to do it. Bribed you with money, women, something. But no. You did it out of your own volition."
"I did it for the Greater Good."
"So did America when they launched the nukes."
-Al and Dante Broaden- The Men Behind the Man
"I'd never let them do that to me. Wouldn't mattter if I got a new super-arm or a...an extendo-dick, I just wouldn't let them do that to me."
-Dante Broaden- The Men Behind the Man
"So...I heard that you were a helluva lot nicer in the past. What put a stick up your ass?"
"In the past month, I had to Old Yeller my best friend who killed my girlfriend's father, and watch previously mentioned girlfriend get all loveydovey with this dude-who-looks-like-a-lady named Gary. My home was almost taken over by the Enclave, all my friends almost died in there, and I got stabbed in the side. And I got brainwashed."
"I can...comprehend your bitterness."
-Al and Dante Broaden- The Men Behind the Man
"So you needed to interruptus my coitus to tell me that?"
-Roy Phillips- The Men Behind the Man
"You didn't give Tenpenny mercy. Or Dashwood. Or anyone else. Why do you deserve it? That's right. You don't."
-Al and Roy- The Men Behind the Man
"He who fights monsters should see to it that he himself does not become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you. Fredrick Nietzsche said that."
"I don't know who that is or what it means."
"It means that seeking vengeance or justice against evil people turns you evil by your continued quest for it. If I had killed Lynn, then I'd become a monster myself. If you weren't here..."
"I know. You'd become a worse guy than Roy, or whatever. You'd go around killing anyone who got in your way, up until someone you cared about tear-riddenly screamed that 'you're no better than Roy!' and you'd realize that you did in fact, become a monster...Am I right?"
"Yeah, that's probably how it'd go."
-Al and Dante Broaden- The Men Behind the Man