Author has written 5 stories for Naruto, and Bleach.
Name: just call me Lazy XP, or any other variant of my pen name (NOTE- I changed my pen name from 'Ita-hime' to 'Lady Lazy')
Birthday: November 18
Bio: Let's see... I'm pale, with usually green eyes that sometimes change to grey, hazel, or blue (weird, I know), I wear glasses, and I have extremely light brown hair with natural golden blonde highlights. I love all kinds of shopping, but am by no means a 'girly girl'; I hate the color pink (unless it's on Haruno Sakura form Naruto, for some odd reason), my favorite colors are midnight blue, blood red, and black, in that order, my prefered style is jeans or sweat pants and a T-shirt with coverses, high tops, or flip flops (either that or layers), I'm obssessed with anime (mainly Naruto) and FanFiction and proud of it, I have a bad habbit of swearing that I can't/don't want to get rid of, my favorite past times are reading and writing (FanFiction, mostly- like I said, I'm obssessed), and my favorite mythical beings are vampires- and angels (fallen or otherwise), but I prefer the former. And I'm obsessed with ancient Greek mythology, as well- but, anyways.
I have quite the temper and can be pretty violent when I want to (I don't attack people or anything like that, I just meant that if I get pissed enough, I have no problems with smacking someone upside the head or something) and I always have to get the last word in (my brother says it's because I'm a girl and stubborn as hell). I have three siblings; an older sister, an older brother, and a younger sister, and my older sister has two daughters (the younger one has the same birthday as Uchiha Itachi, hehe), and I have a big family besides that (aunts, uncles, cousins, second cousins, grandparents, etc.). My family's catholic, and we believe in God, but we don't really go to church or anything, and I don't particularily care weather others share the same religion as me; what they believe in (or if they believe in anything) is up to them, and none of my business.
I'm weird, and it's actually an off day where I'm not told that I'm insane (not, like, mental asylum crazy, I just do/say stupid, random, and usually pointless shit- usually with my friends) and I'm not afraid to tell anyone where to go when they desurve it. Despite all of this, I'm actually really shy and self-conscious. Besides zombies (it's not funny; they scare the crap out of me!) and losing the people close to me, public speaking is really my worst fear. I might not care what people think of me, but I do care what people think about me, if that makes any sense. Call me a bitch or some shit like that, I'll just say it right back, but start making fun of me and I'm a pathetic "Well, fuck you!" kind of person- no proper come back, and I'd be worried about what the person had said for the next week until someone tells me I'm being an idiot and I realize that, why, yes, I am.
I'd name my favorite animes/movies/TV series/books/musicians/songs/etc., but it'd take too long, so if there's anything else you'd like to know (other then creepy stalker shit like my name, age, location, etc.), feel free to PM me and ask.
I write for the entertainment of myself and my readers. If you as a reader don't like my story, the opinions veiwed in my story, the person or couple my story is based on, ect., then DON'T READ IT! Constructive critisism is welcome, but just straight out saying you hate someone's story is extremely rude, so please refrain from doing so.
Thank you for reading and/or reveiwing one or more of my stories! If you find any mistakes in spelling, grammer, or even something from the original plot that I got wrong and didn't justify, please inform me of it in a reveiw. Thank you!
"Why, thank you, Jack." "You're welcome." "Not you. We named the monkey Jack." -Jack Sparrow and Barbossa from 'Pirates of the Carribean, Curse of the Black Pearl'
"Me? I'm dishonest. And a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest. Honestly. It's the honest ones you want to watch for, because you can never predict when they're going to do something incredibly stupid." -Jack Sparrow from 'Pirates of the Carribean, Curse of the Black Pearl'
"This is the day that-" *falls over cliff* -Jack Sparrow from 'Pirates of the Carribean, Curse of the Black Pearl'
"What's your purpose in Port Royal, Mr. Smith?" "Yeah, and no lies." "Well then, I confess. It is my intention to commondeer one of these ships, pick up a crew in Tortuga, raid, pilage, plunder, and otherwise pilfer my weaselly black guts out." "I said no lies." "I think he's telling the truth." "If he were telling the truth, he wouldn't have told us." "Unless he knew you wouldn't believe the truth, even if he told you." -Jack Sparrow, Murtogg, and Mullroy from 'Pirates of the Carribean, Curse of the Black Pearl'
"Or perhaps you practice three hours a day because you've already found a girl, but are otherwise incapable of wooing said stumpet." *pauses* "You're not a unich, are you?" -Jack Sparrow from 'Pirates of the Carribean, Curse of the Black Pearl'
"Oi, fishface! Lose something?! Eh? Scungilli!" *falls down stairs* *holds up jar of dirt* "Got it!" -Jack Sparrow from 'Pirates of the Carribean, Dead Man's Chest'
"Go to the left- to the left!" *headless body hits a tree* "No... that's a tree..." -Random crewmember of the Flying Dutchmen from 'Pirates of the Carribean, Dead Man's Chest'
"I got a jar of dirt, I got a jar of dirt! And guess what's inside it!" -Jack Sparrow from 'Pirates of the Carribean, Dead Man's Chest'
"It's a key." "No. It's much more better then a key. It is a picture of a key." -Jack Sparrow and a crewmember of the Black Pearl from 'Pirates of the Carribean, Dead Man's Chest'
"Dirt. This is a jar of dirt." "Yes." "Is the... jar of dirt going to help?" "If you don't want it, give it back." "No!" *hugs jar of dirt* "Then it helps." -Jack Sparrow and Tia Dalma from 'Pirates of the Carribean, Dead Man's Chest'
"My peanut." -Jack Sparrow from 'Pirates of the Carribean, At World's End'
"Gentelmen, I wash my hands of this weirdness." -Jack Sparrow from 'Pirates of the Carribean, At World's End'
"'Up is down'. Well, that's just madeningly unhelpful." -Jack Sparrow from 'Pirates of the Carribean, At World's End'
"This is madness!" "This is politics." -Elizabeth Swann and Jack Sparrow from 'Pirates of the Carribean, At World's End'
"You can throw my hat if you like." "Aye, Captain!" *throws hat* "Now go and get it." -Jack Sparrow and Gibbs from 'Pirates of the Carribean, At World's End'
"Damon, don't be such a caveman!" -Elena Gilbert from 'Vampire Diaries'
"I was wrong." "Are you drunk?" -Damon Salvatore and Elena Gilbert from 'Vampire Diaries'
"Is he okay?" "No, Elena, he's not okay. He's an insufferable martyr who needs his ass kicked." -Elena Gilbert and Damon Salvatore from 'Vampire Diaries'
"If I see something I haven't seen before, I'll throw a dollar at it." -Damon Salvatore from 'Vampire Diaries'
"I was ambushed. I was shot. Now, I'm vengeful." -Damon Salvatore from 'Vampire Diaries'
"Why are you so mean to me?" "Uh, have you met you? You're not a nice person." -Damon Salvatore and Lexi from 'Vampire Diaries'
"I have a diabolical master plan." "What is it?" "Well if I told you, it wouldn't be very diabolical, now, would it?" -Damon Salvatore and Lexi from 'Vampire Diaries'
"I'm Damon Salvatore." "I know. I've heard great things about you." "Really? That's weird. I'm a dick." -Damon Salvatore and Mason Lockwood from 'Vampire Diaries'
"Die, you mummy bastards, die!" -Maddog from 'The Mummy, Curse of the Dragon Emperor'
"You stupid elf! You could've killed me!" "Dobby never meant to kill. Only maim or... seriously injure." -Bellatrix Lestrange and Dobby from 'Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows', Part 1
"Frankly, I'm too scared to ask about the frog." -Flin from 'Tangled'
helicopter shows up* "That's good." *helicopter gets hit* "Okay, that's not good!" *helicopter crashes* -Random officer from 'The Dark Knight'
"What a marshmellow." -Jacob Black from 'New moon' (the movie)
"Don't worry, Bella. Those bears won't get the jump on me. My kung fu is strong." -Harry Clearwater from 'New moon' (the movie)
"It reminds me of BumbleBee... if BumbleBee were sad piece of shit." -Mrs. Witwhicky from 'Transformers 3, the Dark of the Moon'
"Bad humans!" Number Johnny 5 from 'Short Circuit 2'
"You're stupid, aren't you?" -Juuri Kuran from 'Vampire Kight'
"I'm Gaara of the Desert. Wherever there is rock- wherever there is earth, I can make more sand." Sabaku no Gaara from 'Naruto', episode 220
"Under my mask is... another mask!" -Hatake Kakashi from 'Naruto', episode 101
Gai throws Kakashi over his back* 'That's just wrong.' -Uzumaki Naruto from 'Naruto Shippuden', episode 32
"Don't mess with an anphibian, lest you suffer his wrath!" -Gamabunta from 'Naruto', episode 173
"You know, logic had a brother. His name is SHUT THE HELL UP!" -Hatake Kakashi from 'Naruto Abridged', episode 4
gets wrapped up in chains* "Not now, Anko." -Hatake Kakashi from 'Naruto Abridged', episode 4
"We got him now, brother!" "Why, thank you, Captain Obvious!" -The Demon Brothers from 'Naruto Abridged', episode 4
"It's okay. We'll just leave it up to my friend, Mr. Poofy Pajama Pants." -Haku from 'Naruto Abridged', episode 4
"Now, I want you to run up the tree." "Why?" "Because, I !&*?% said so." -Hatake Kakashi and Uzumaki Naruto from 'Naruto Abridged', episode 5
'Wait for me, Slightly-stupid Naruto! Slim Chouji's coming to back you up!!' -Akimichi Chouji from 'Naruto', manga chapter 573
"Well, I can't really see with the door in my way!" -My little sister
"Logic and reason go out the door when pie is involved!" -My little sister
"You're such a blanket hoarder." "What?" "I said, you're a blanket hoarder." "Oh, good, I thought you called me a blanket whore." "No. ...But, now that I think about it, you kind of are. I mean, think of how many blankets you sleep with at night." -Me and my little sister
"He looks like Jesus." "Since when is Jesus pale, blonde-haired, and blue-eyed?" "Since Hitler." -My friend and me (I mean no offense! We hate Hitler as much as the next person...)
"Please, please, don't make me rip up your test. Please don't make me an asshole. Please don't make my wife right." -My Gr. 9 Religion teacher
"Sir, I can't hear you." "Good, because that's what happens when you talk over me. Bitch." -My friend and my Gr. 9 Religion teacher
"Jordan, did you take your pill today?" "I did." "Okay, well, then, you need to take two." -My Gr. 9 French teacher and one of my classmates
"If you ever buy a van, I will never come near you again." -My friend to my other friend
"Just remember, behind every powerful man is a powerful woman." "And his mistress." -Me and my friend
"It's okay. We're all triangular, my kite-shaped friend." -...Me. Don't ask.
"Love me, hate me, I just exist awesomely." -Me
"Can I hold the puppy?" "You know what you can hold? You can hold your hopes and dreams... and then you can throw them away, because you're not getting the puppy." -My neighbour and me
"Taste the rainbow!" *throws skittles at him* *looks down, then up* "You know you have to clean that up now, right?" -Me and my older brother
"What the fuck is wrong with you?! How many monkeys do you know that shave their asses?!" -My older brother
"You know what? Just for that, I'm gonna eat this whole bag of cheese!" *holds up bag of cheese* -My older brother
"Ew! Ew! Ugly lady's trying to suduce the midget! That just makes it worse!"-My older brother (No offense to short people, the way he said it was just unexpectedly hilarious)
"Always be yourself, unless you can be Batman- always be Batman." -Andy Biersack, lead singer of Black Veil Brides
Is it just me, or is Gaara really hot? If you think he is copy this and put it into your profile and add your name to the list. UNITE GAARA LOVERS!! GaaraandAikoforever, LoveShinobi4eva, Silver Element,BlueSkyHeIs, aven, Ketsueki Senshoku, Gaara's Pyro RACCOON, Gaarasminestayaway, .Faking.This.Smile, Lilly, Jay Jay, StormofSilver, inspired122, Kasumi18, Rawr I'm Gonna Eat You, Missyserena214, GaaraIno4ever, sasukerules.org,animeprincess619, Whats2Live4, Shad-Amy, RoseHathaway, bellacullen3, PeinSaku, Lady Lazy
THE WE HATE KARIN CLUB: If you hate Karin from NARUTO, copy and paste this into your profile and add your name to the list: Pink Crescent Moon, Miyako-hime, XSakuraHarunoX, I'm in love with a Uchiha23, Angel Of Cherry Blossoms, Cherrilatina, CherryBlossoms016, Rayray, Sakura the lover, Sasusakufan2357, Lina Mistress of Elements, xnarutoxrocksx,uchihasakurah26, Nokas-Kokas, NorthernLights25, KunoichruleALL, Kawaiiblossom94, dera-chan,Mai-'-Kawaii-'-Ai,Ebil Chameleon you.broke.a.promise, XweaponsXmistressX, Sakura-Sasuke-love-em' , SASUXSAKUFREAK, PinkBlossem, Shadow Princess, CherryBlossoms, Hinatakura, Sakuranata, uchihasakura285, Could-careless, NejiSakuFan, xXHyuugaSakuraXx, RoseHathaway, Shad-Amy, bellacullen3, PeinSaku, Lady Lazy
THE WE LOVE SAKURA CLUB: IF YOU LOVE SAKURA FROM NARUTO, COPY AND PASTE THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE AND ADD YOUR NAME TO THE LIST: XxMadara's-Little-StalkerxX, xXFallenSakuraXx, RoseHathaway, Shad-Amy, bellacullen3, PeinSaku, Lady Lazy
ITACHI IS AWESOME!!! If you love Itachi from 'Naruto' before the massacre ever happened, put this on your profile and add your name to the list: Tiger Priestess, Bulla49, Princess Mayako, ItaSaku1, Minato-kun Luver, Lady Lazy
Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list: AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Tsuyu Mikazuki, WeaselChick, Revenant666, darkflame1516, AirGirl Phantom, Agent of the Divine One, pointless people of Pluto, ZeratheNightDancer, Acegik13, Ryuu-Chiyo, Akemi-Chiyo, Archangel's Requiem, DarkHikariDevil, SharinganAngel, A-Hime, fullmetal'sgirl92, EmoNekoNinja, yaoifmafan, Necropolis demon, iluvitachi93,Sasukez, SilverWolfStar, ChinaDollMaiden, Lady Lazy
93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile and add your name to the list: Sunlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Moonlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Evil Genius of the COCA, Invader Miley Phantom, dAnnYsGiRl777, BloodySalvation, Lady Lost-A-Lot, bellabookworm9, Bella Masen Cullen, Vampire Scooby, Alannaswarrior, SpottedLilly, Alleyanna Cullen, hugs.4.all.the.emo.boyz,sk8rchickmax, hizmit12-waterlilly3721, Moonlight Music Mistress, Kannika, Heza-chan X3, totalnarutofangirl85, ShadesofDeath, SweetScarlett97, Lady Lazy
If you are against fur coats or killing animals just to look good, copy and paste this into your profile and add your name: Snowfirexoxo, FlameRisingSucks101, Swanfeather, xRae_Starkhenx, Sasukez, SilverWolfStar, ChinaDollMaiden, Lazy Lazy
If you have ever had a crush on a fictional character, copy and paste this on your profile and add your penname and the name(s) of the characters you have crushed on: HollyluvsArty (James Potter, Sirius Black (when he was young), Artemis Fowl), comix-freak (Artemis Fowl (and Arty is my one and only!)), ClarinetWrathArineko (Nara Shikamaru, Sabaku no Gaara, Richie from Pokémon, Jeremie from Code Lyoko), kaleni of the sand (gaara neji saskue shikamaru naruto and toshiro), Uchihas1010hyuuga (Neji (Naruto), Aqualad (TeenTitans), Ken (Digimon)), Sakura Uchiha Hyuuga no Sabaku (Itachi Uchiha (Naruto)), Artemis Fowl (Artemis Fowl), Train Heartnet (Black Cat), xBlackCherryBlossomx (Neji Hyuuga, Gaara no Sabaku, Sasuke Uchiha, Kiba Inuzuka, Sai -I'm guessing his last name is Hozuki-, Itachi Uchiha, Deidara no Akatsuki, Sasori no Akatsuki, Hidan no Akatsuki, Suigetsu Hozuki (Naruto), ShelbyQueen25 (Artemis Fowl, Itachi Uchiha, Suigetsu Hozuki, Toshiro Hitsugaya, Sai, Stark(Espada Number One), Ulquiorra S., Gin Ichimaru, Deidara, Sasori), MnC21 (Hitsugaya Toshiro, Gaara, Kaito Kid, Natsu Dragneel, Gray Fullbuster, VampireTwin234 (Bleach:Toushiro Hitsugaya & Renji Abarai (Naruto/Naruto Shippuden:Itachi Uchiha, Shikamaru Nara, Pein, Hidan, Deidara, Sasori of the Red Sand, & Gaara of the Sand (Kuroshitsuji:Ciel Phantomhive, & Sebastian Michaelis (Death Note:L, Mello, BB, Light/Kira)), Lady Lazy (Damon Salvatore from Vampire Diaries, Sirius Black from Harry Potter, Uchiha Itachi, Sabaku no Gaara, Namikaze Minato, and Hatake Kakashi from Naruto, and Dante Sparda from Devil May Cry)
FANFICTION- UNITED NATIONS!! Has anyone else noticed how a lot of us get along and make friends on here and we can be from completely different countries? WTF!? We're here making world peace on the INTERNET and we have all those ambassadors and senators and whatever struggling with it!! If you realize this (or read this and agreed) copy and paste this and add your name and country (country is optional) to the list. SPREAD THE PEACE!!: Naruto-fan-Okami-chan (USA), NaraTemari011 (Puerto Rico), Lala girl in Lalaland (USA), Kakashi Forever (England), ChiyoChiyamamoto (USA), Mischa Rowe (Australia), Lady Lazy (Canada)
The "You no like, you no read" club: If you believe that people who don't like someone's story should simply not read it instead of posting cruel and hateful reviews, copy and paste this into your profile and add your name to the list: Alicia's Purple Velvet Purse, changelingchild, crimsonchidori, SasukeSakuraxXXxItachiSakura,foxfeather1337,Sadistic-Bitch, Cherry Blossom Girl13, XxBirdxOfxHermesxX, Lady Lazy
92 percent of the teen population would be dead if Abercrombie and Fitch said it wasn't cool to breathe anymore. Put this in your profile if you are one of the 8 percent who would be laughing your ass off.
If you hate Jacob Black, then copy and paste on to your profile.
If you are against racism, COPY THIS ONTO YOUR PROFILE. The only race is humanity.
About 93% of the female population would die if Miley Cyrus decided to jump off a building. Post this on your page if you are the 7% that would be yelling, "Jump, Bitch!"
95% of teenagers would be terrified if Justin Beiber was about to jump off a building to kill himself. Copy and paste this if you are one of the 5% who would video it while yelling, "JUMP!!!" and laughing your ass off.
If you have ever been totally embarrassed by a parent, relative, friend, or anyone else, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you think that Writer's Block sucks, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you can go on a sugar buzz without even eating sugar, join the club and copy and paste this to your profile.
No one believes in the probability of a GaaSaku in the show. If you believe it, then copy and paste this in your profile.
If you think being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever yelled at a TV after getting frustrated at someone who can't hear you, put this on your profile.
If several inanimate objects hate you, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile!
A large percent of writers don't know the difference between 'your' and 'you're'. If you're one of the ones who does know and wants to slug them, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever laughed and couldn't stop yourself from laughing for the next few minutes, copy and paste this.
If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever run into a tree, copy this to your profile.
If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile.
If you have ever tripped down the stairs copy this into your profile.
If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this into your profile
If you are completely random, copy and paste this on to your profile.
If you hate Karin from Naruto and hope she dies at the hands of Sasuke, Sakura, or both, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.
If you love Itachi more than Sasuke, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you actually wouldn't mind school if it was Naruto-related, copy and paste this to your profile.
98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If your one of the 2 percent that hasn't, copy & paste this into your profile.
If you have been accused of being weird, random, and crazy, copy this into your profile.
If you've ever copy and pasted something to your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you think being unique is cooler than being cool, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you think that Tobi should come back instead of Madara, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you think that Itachi is badass, copy and paste this onto your profile.
A ninja waits until the dead of night, when the enemy sleeps and drops his guard, when his weapons lie forgotten in the stillness of the night, that is the moment for a ninja to strike. Copy this into your profile if you're a ninja!
If you think girls should rule the world and that it would be a better place copy this onto your profile.
If you know someone who should be run over by a bus, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you want to slap Sasuke for leaving Sakura, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you want to slap Kabuto for no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you want to slap Naruto for not noticing Hinata, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile. (...As you can probably tell, I'm a little too violent for my own good... heheheh...)
If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.
If you have embarrasing memories that make you want to smack yourself/someone else, copy this into your profile.
If you love naruto so much that you wish the characters were real or that you are one of them, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever run into a doorway that you clearly could've dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you like vampires, copy this onto your profile.
Doing homework sucks. Copy and paste this into your profile if you agree.
If you are antisocial sometimes, copy and paste this into your profile.
I solemly swear that anyone who flames my stories will get a flame back. FIGHT FIRE WITH FIRE! BEAT OUT THE FLAMES! If you agree (or hate flamers) put this in your profile. (IT'S JUST PLAIN RUDE!!!)
If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this into your profile.
There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever wondered why someone decided to milk a cow, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you think that writing FanFiction stories is fun then copy this onto your profile!
If you have ever fallen off a chair backwards, copy and paste this in your profile. (Right in the middle of class... not fun.)
If you know a video game/book/movie/anime/manga character or weapon that need(s) to exist, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you hate those obnoxious, snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.
If you have your own little world, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you believe that Naruto is the Best Anime out there then copy and paste this onto your page to spread the word.
If you are obsessed with FanFiction copy this into your profile.
If you've ever threatened a computer or video game console, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you think that the Akatsuki rule, put this on your profile!
I don't suffer from insanity... I enjoy every minute of it. If you are insane, enjoying every second, and proud of it, copy this and paste it into your profile.
If you hate Karin from NARUTO copy and paste these Karin bashings:
Karin is so fat, not even Naruto can believe it!
And I made this one up myself... Karin's so fat, not even Pein's Almighty Push could budge her.
I think that Karin needs to die. Soon.
Sing in the tune of 'I love you, you love me'
I love you
You love me
Let's go out and KILL KARIN
With a 'death bomb', Bang! Boom!
KARIN'S ON THE FLOOR
No more stupid SLUT SLASH WHORE!
Copy this in your profile if you hate Karin and thinks she's a whore (Karin in Naruto Shippuuden)
If you're against racism, copy and paste this onto your profile.
A black man walks into a cafe one early morning and noticed that he was the only black man there. As he sat down, he noticed a white man behind him.
If you think this is cute, copy and paste this into your profile.
Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?
The boy woke up, just 14 years old.
Jon Gettle hung himself in front of his middle school in Illinois at midnight. He left a note. it stated: "Bullying is a Problem."
A true friend sees the 1st tear, catches the 2nd, and bitchslaps the mothafucker that causes the 3rd.
Call me what you want; I really don't care. But if you insult my friends...see here, buddy, let's take a walk. Let me give you a little hint: call the police, you stupid little shit, 'cause there's about to be a murder.
I pray for wisdom to understand him, love to forgive him, and patience for his moods. Because if I pray for strength, I'll just beat the shit out of him.
You're my best friend in the whole world. I would do anything for you. And since I know you would want me to stay safe, I'll trip you if zombies start chasing us.
I only seem like a smartass 'cause I'm surrounded by dumbasses.
Well, aren't we just a ray of fucking sunshine.
Trust no man, fear no bitch.
Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.
Hating me won't make you pretty.
Don't underestimate me, pal. See this smile? It's not really a smile. It's a destraction so I can punch you in the face.
May God have mercy on my enemies, 'cause I sure as hell won't.
It's a beautiful day... now watch some asshole fuck it up.
You were born an original, don't die a copy.
You laugh because I'm different. I laugh becase you are all the same.
When you want to fool the world, tell the truth.
The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense.
I’m not clumsy… the floor just hates me.
I've probably learned more from Google than I have from school.
Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.
Keep smiling- it makes everyone wonder what your up to.
I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.
Laugh at your problems, everybody else does.
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
I am NOT saying your stupid... I'm just implying it.
Kids are the future. Be scared. Be very scared.
I'm not crazy. My reality is just different then yours.
Note to self: It is illegal - repeat, illegal - to stab stupid people.
You're just jealous because the voices are talking to me.
People who investigate noises in horror movies deserve to die.
I'm not insensitive, I just don't care.
If your problem can't be solved with duct tape or Tylenol, then you're seriously fucked.
Some people are just like slinkies. They're not good for anything, but it's fun to watch them fall down the stairs.
Heaven kicked me out. Hell was afraid I'd take over.
War doesn't determine who's right. War determines who's left.
The optimist proclaims we live in the best of all possible worlds; the pessimist fears it is true.
You say I've lost my sanity. Well I have news for you; you can't lose what you never had.
According to the latest figures, 43 percent of all statistics are utterly worthless.
Don't steal. The government hates the competition.
If at first you don't succeed, change the rules.
There's nothing wrong with talking to random objects. Its when they start to talk back that you need to worry.
Who ever said that words never hurt obviously has never got hit by a dictionary.
I'm bored. Run for your sanity.
There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.
My imaginary friend thinks you have serious mental problems.
It's better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than to open it and remove all doubt.
What is a 'free' gift? Aren't all gifts free?
I want to die in my sleep like my great grandfather; not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car...
If you don't like my driving then stay off the sidewalk!
Education is important. School, however, is another matter.
Chaos. Panic. Disorder. My work here is done.
There are very few problems that cannot be solved using a large amount of explosives.
I swear, officer. I didn't punch her; I just high-fived her face.
Didn't give a fuck yesterday, don't give a fuck today, probably won't give a fuck tomorrow.
You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder.
STRESS: A condition brought on by over-riding the bodies natural desire to choke the living daylights out of some jerk who desperately deserves it.
If you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.
You don't have to be faster than the bear, you just have to be faster than the slowest guy running from the bear.
There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.
Therapist = The/rapist. Scary thought . . .
Flying is simple. Just throw yourself at the ground and miss.
You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it.
He who laughs last didn't get it, and he who laughs first has the dirtiest mind.
Therapy pays off later; screaming obsentities and beating the shit out of people pays off now.
It takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 to smile, and 4 to reach out and slap someone.
I called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse.
Excuse me, have you seen my sanity? I think I lost it.
The dinosaurs' extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came and they all commited suicide.
"Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong."
"Celibacy is not hereditary."
"Beauty is only skin deep, ugly goes to the bone."
"Never argue with a fool, people might not know the difference."
"Friends come and go, but enemies accumulate."
"The other queue is always faster."
"Anything you try to fix will take longer and cost more than you thought."
"The chance of a slice of bread falling butter side down is directly proportional to the cost of the carpet."
"Never sleep with someone crazier than yourself."
"The repairman will never have seen a model quite like yours before."
"A short cut is the longest distance between two points."
"Anything good in life is either illegal, immoral, or fattening."
"The light at the end of the tunnel is the headlight of an oncoming train."
Murphy's Golden Rule: "Whoever has the gold makes the rules. In order to get a loan, you must first prove you don't need it."
My name is Sarah
I must be stupid
I wish I were better,
I can't speak at all,
When I awake,
When my mommy does come,
Don't make a sound!
I hear him curse,
I try and hide
He finds me weeping
He slaps me and hits me
He's already locked it
I fall to the floor
"I'm sorry!" I scream,
The hurt and the pain,
And he finally stops
My name is Sarah,
Child abuse, MAKE IT STOP!
R.I.P Uchiha Itachi
You will always live within our hearts.
Copy and paste this into your profile if Itachi's death affected you greatly.
At age 8, your dad buys you an ice cream. You thanked him by dripping
When you were 9 years old, he paid for piano lessons. You thanked him
When you were 10 years old he drove you all day, from soccer to
When you were 11 years old, he took you and your friends to
When you were 12 years old, he warned you not to watch
When you were 13, he suggested a haircut that was in fashion.
When you were 14, he paid for a month away at summer camp.
When you were 15, he came home from work, looking for a hug.
When you were 16, he taught you how to drive his car. You
When you were 17, he was expecting an important call. You thanked him
When you were 18, he cried at your high school graduation. You thanked
When you were 19, he paid for your college tuition, drove you to campus
When you were 25, he helped to pay for your wedding, and he told you
When you were 50, he fell ill and needed you to take care of him. You
And then, one day, he quietly died. And everything you never did came
If you love your dad, post this on your profile.
...() () (\_/) (\_/)
Mummy... Johnny brought a gun to school.
Now you have two choices:
Itachi -/ \-
Copy and paste this to your profile to help them take over the world!!!
20 QUESTIONS WITH THE AKATSUKI:
1. Who is your favourite character?
2. What do you think of the whole Madara being Tobi-thing?
3. Who would you be teamed up with?
4. If you could have any abilities, what would they be?
5. Madara comes up to you and asks, "Wanna go somewhere private and have some 'fun'?" How do you react?
6. Hidan comes in your room and starts ranting on about how Kakuzu pisses him off, then begs you to convert to Jashinism. How do you react?
7. Zetsu is standing in the corner of the living room, and he shows you a rose. He asks what you think of it, how do you react?
8. Itachi is sitting in the kitchen, drinking tea. However, when you come into the kitchen to grab a drink, he starts smiling at you. Thinking you have something on your face, you almost run from the room, only to be stopped by Itachi. He asks if he can brush your hair, because he admires how soft and long it is. How do you react?
9. Kakuzu has been quiet for a week, and one day when you're alone, he walks up to you and asks you if you have any spare change and if you'd like to go food shopping. How do you react?
10. Once upon a time before you 'joined' the Akatsuki, you were good friends with Naruto. He'd been tracking you for years- almost as much as he does with Sasuke, when he finally finds you and begs you to come back to the village with him. How do you react?
11. Upon stumbling into Ino and Sakura bitch-fighting about how pretty they are and who's-more-skilled-than-who, what do you do?
12. Who's art is better? Deidara's or Sasori's?
13. You tell them you think your art is better, and they begin a huge arguement about how your art isn't as great as theirs, what do you do?
14. Kisame asks if you want to go swimming- your answer?
15. For the next two days Kisame tells you it's nothing but a harmless swim. How do you react?
16. What are your views on Sasuke?
17. Rock Lee tells you he has a crush on you, your reaction?
18. Which is better? Manga or Anime?
19. Which village would you prefer to live in?
20. Which Naruto couples do you prefer?
( 0 0 )
These kittens look so kawaii, ne? What about this one:
/ x # \
Kittens don't look right when they're beat up and have black eyes. Help stop animal abuse.
The Stupid Test! Teehee. (put an x next to the one that is you, than in the end, add up all of the x's. if you have 18 or less, than u r not stupid.) p.s. this is not a real test, just something for fun!
(x) Gum has fallen out of your mouth when you were talking.
(x) Gum has fallen out of your mouth when you were NOT talking.
(x) You have run into a glass/screen door.
() You have jumped out of a moving vehicle.
(x) You have thought of something funny and laughed, then people gave you weird looks.
(x) You have run into a tree.
() It IS possible to lick your elbow
() You just tried to lick your elbow.
(x) You never knew that the Alphabet and Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star have the same rhythm.
(x) You just tried to sing them.
(x) You have tripped on your shoelace and fallen.
(x) You have choked on your own spit.
() You have seen the the Matrix and still don’t get it.
(x) You didn’t notice that in the last question “the” was spelled twice
(x) You just looked at it.
(x) Your hair is blonde/dirty blonde/has blonde in it. (ONLY HIGHLIGHTS! AND THEY'RE NATURAL!)
(x) People have called you slow.
total so far=13
() You have accidentally caught something on fire
(x) You tried to drink out of a straw, but it went into your nose/eyes/cheek.
(x) You have caught yourself drooling.
() You’ve fallen asleep in class
() If someone says “fart” you laugh.
() You just laughed.
total so far= 15
() Sometimes you just stop thinking
(x) You tell a story and forget what you were talking about
(x) People are often shaking their heads and walking away from you
() You are often told to use your “inside voice”.
(x) You use your fingers to do simple math.
total so far= 18
() You have eaten a bug.
(x) You are taking this test when you should be doing something important
(x) You have put your clothes on backwards or inside out, and didn’t realize it
(x) You’ve looked all over for something and realized it was in your hand, pocket, head, etc.
total so far= 21
() You sometimes post bulletins because you are scared that what they say will happen to you if you don’t even when you know it won’t happen to you.
() You break a lot of things.
() Your friends know not to use big words around you
(x) You sometimes tilt your head when you’re confused
(x) You have fallen out of your chair before
(x) When you’re lying in bed, you try to find pictures in the texture of the ceiling
Huh... well, at least I can take comfort in the fact that, while I may be stupid, I still get good grades!
This is a story about God. Read if you believe in him, and read even if you don't.
A teenage girl about 17 named Diane had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away.
As she walked along under the tall elm trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely.
The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her." Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 98% of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93% of the people that read this won’t repost it?
Repost this if you truly believe in God.
PS: God is always there in your heart and loves you no matter what,
Unsafe External Link