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Poll: What do you hoard in Skyrim? Your answers will be used for a fic I have planned later on! Vote Now!
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Joined 12-09-10, id: 2650132, Profile Updated: 08-05-15
Author has written 43 stories for Call of Duty, Assassin's Creed, Star Wars, Elder Scroll series, and StarTrek: The Original Series.

Heys everyone. I've been talked into this by a friend of mine, but I guess I'll be posting fanfics I've already made.

One of my friends has told me how good these were and so I'm posting them here for you all to read.

In other news...

Current Residence: If you look here to know where I live then you're a stalker. fine I'm in East Nowhere
Interests: Animals, and Anime'... and COD
Favourite movie: Star Wars
Favourite band or musician: Paramore, Audioslave, Midnight Oil, Green Day, 3 Day Grace, 3 Doors Down, Linkin Park, P!nk
Favourite genre of music: Rock. Maybe some pop.
Favourite artist: Jackson Pollock, my friend, and my mom (yup call me lame but still she is great)
Favourite poet or writer: Richelle Mead, Robert Frost, James Patterson, Erin Hunter
Favourite photographer: Unknown
Favourite style of art: Anime', CHUBI'S, and splatter painting!
MP3 player of choice: Ipod Touch
Shell of choice: uhhh. Beach shells?
Wallpaper of choice: Picture of my favorite characters
Skin of choice: Flowers and leaves
Favourite game: Call of Duty Modern Warfare 2, Assassins Creed Brotherhood, Sims 3
Favourite gaming platform: If you mean like a gaming system then Xbox360.
Favourite cartoon character: GAH I CAN"T DISCIDE! TOO MANY TO CHOICE FROM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Personal Quotes: "Yesterday was hurtful, and you may feel sorry for yourself today. But tomorrow is a new day." "I'm nobody, nobody's perfect, therefor I'm perfect." "When life gives you lemons... SQUIRT LEMON JUICE IN THE EYES OF YOUR ENEMIES!"
Favourite color: Forest green, black, silver, ice and watery blue.
Favourite season: Summer, no school, and it's warm.
Favourite place to be: The woods behind my house where nobody can see me. But I'm usually in my room.
Favourite song: Be Yourself by Audioslave and Boulevard of Broken Dreams by Greenday
Favourite character in general (anywhere movies, games, so on): Max from Maximum Ride, Soap MacTavish from COD MW2, and Ezio from Assassines Creed Brotherhood, Jewls from Pulpfiction, The characters I make up.

93% of american teens would have an emotianal breakdown if some random dude called them a freak if you're one of the 7% that would say "what was your first clue?" copy and paste this onto your profile

99% percent of american girls would cry if they saw justin beiber on a skyscraper about to jump if you're one of the 1% that would be on the the skyscraper, sitting on a lawn chair with popcorn telling him to do a flip copy and paste this onto whatever you want


1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.

2. Set all the alarm clocks in Electronics to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.

4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone,
" 'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.

5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.

6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

9. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.

10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.

11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.

13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through,
say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream..
"NO! NO! It's those voices again!"

15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!

16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "Pikachu, I choose you!"

90 of teens today would die if Myspace had a system failure and was completely destroyed. If you are one of the 10 that would be laughing/hacked the site in the first place, copy and paste this to your Profile.

98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy and paste this into your profile.

Too many kids and teenagers have smoked or tried marijuana. If you haven't, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.

If people think you are mentally insane...copy and paste this onto your profile

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

I like cheese. I have seen purple cows. If two gooses are geese, then why aren't two moose meese, or when two foots are feet, why aren't two footballs feetball? Milk tastes good. People call me crazy, but I'm just random! If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile!

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If someone has ever said something to you that had nothing to do with your current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you sometimes talk to yourself copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you hate gay pairings, copy and paste this into your profile.

98 percent of authors confuse "you're" and "your". If YOU'RE one of the 2 percent who knows how to tell them apart, copy and paste this into YOUR profile.

If you think that doing the disclaimer more than once is silly unless there are new characters involved, copy and paste this into your profile.

No event is complete without theme music. If you have ever started humming/singing your own theme music, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are one of the proud teens/adults who have a v-o-c-a-b-u-l-a-r-y and do not limit themselves to "omg!" and "Like, that is, like, so, like, totally awsome...!". copy and paste this into your profile.

If you fantasize about meeting one or more of the characters you made up, copy and paste this into your profile.

Eighty percent of Americans don't smoke. If you're one of that eighty percent, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you can listen to a song and match some of the lyrics up to your life, copy and paste this onto your profile.

70% of soldiers would be sitting around like a sack of potatos if they didn't have any weapons what so ever. If you're one of the 30% throwing skittles and screaming "TASTE THE F*CKING RAINBOW!" at your enemies, copy and paste this on your profile.

If Twilight said that breathing wasn't cool then we'd lose 97% of the teenage girl population. If you're one of the 3% laughing, copy and paste this on your profile.

If Edward Cullen showed up at someone's front door the 48% of girls would rape him, another 48% would maul him. If you're one of the 4% who'd call him a fairy then slam the door in his face, copy and paste this on your profile.

If Superman and Batman got into an epic battle 99% of nerds would not leave the area until they saw the outcome. If you're the 1% of nerds who have a life and would blow the two off, copy and paste this on your profile.

Green Day - Boulevard of Broken Dreams

I walk a loney road
The only one that I have ever known
Don't know where it goes
But it's home to me and I walk alone

I walk this empty street
On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams
Where the city sleeps
And I'm the only one and I walk alone
I walk alone
I walk alone
I walk alone
I walk a...

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find
'Til then I walk alone

I'm walking down the line
That divides me somewhere in my mind
On the boarder line
On the edge and where I walk alone

Read between the lines
What's fucked up and everything's alright
Check my vital signs
To know I'm still alive and I walk alone
I walk alone
I walk alone
I walk alone
I walk a...

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find
'Til then I walk alone
I walk alone
I walk a...

guitar solo*

I walk this empty street
On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams
Where the city sleeps
And I'm the only one and I walk a...

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find
'Til then I walk alone


31 ways to annoy your teachers...

1. Walk into the classroom like a super spy. (keep your back on the walls as you walk, point your finger up like a gun, look around with shifty eyes, hum the mission impossible theme, etc.)
2.After everything your teacher says, ask why continuously.
3.If your teacher is yelling at a classmate, wait for them to finish their tantrum then ask” DOES SOMEBODY NEED A HUG?????”very loudly
4. If your teacher starts blowing up at you for saying that simply reply “wow I can tell you’re a blast at parties”
5.Dress up like L (death note) and walk in with no shoes
6. IF your teacher asks “why aren’t you wearing shoes” you reply by standing on the table, pointing at him/her and yelling “YOUR KIRA!!!!!!!!!!!”
7.(back to normal clothes) Sit in a corner and wait for everyone to stare at you. When they do, grab your head and scream “ THE LIGHT! MAKE IT STOP! ARGH IT BURNS!!!!”
8.Flick pieces of paper around the class.
9. When your teacher tells you to stop, cross your arms and say “your racist against paper aren’t you.”
10.Don’t do your Homework.
11. When your teacher asks you why you didn’t do your homework say “I dropped it while beating up this guy for saying you’re the worst teacher ever.” then smile and sit.
12. When you have a sub, wait for them to write their name on the board. Then when they say hello my name it Mr./Mrs (insert name here), you stand up and say “PROVE IT!”
13.During a test, raise your hand and wait for your teacher to walk over to you. Then when they whisper, “what do you need help on?” you smirk and whisper “I know what you did last summer” XD (A/n: gets them every time!!!!)
14. Wear your Sasuke costume to school.
15.When he/she stares at you, say “I know what your thinking, but this symbol on my back does not mean I’m a pokemon,”
16. 5 minutes after saying that throw a poke ball at your teachers head and scream “ GOTTA CATCH THEM ALL!!!!!!!”
17. Accuse him/her of being Itachi Uchiha. Then give them a paranoid, bloodthirsty look.
18. (back in normal clothes) hand candy out to everyone then walk up to your teacher and say “HA! None for you=P that’s payback for that F!” >D
19.Be Tardy. When your teacher asks why you were late say “My goldfish died.” Then burst into tears. :D
20.When turning in a paper, write this paper will self destruct in 5 seconds and the bottom.
21.When you leave the class bow and say “May the force be with you, young one.”
22.Show up to class (now they got to do their job XD SUCKERS!)
23.Everytime the PA comes on act surprised and scream “NO NOT THE VOICES AGAIN! MAKE THEM STOP!!!!!!”
24. Every time the morning announcements start look around the rooms ceiling and say “GOD? It that you?!?!”
25.Whisper to the person next to you. When the teacher comes up behind you, scream “OMG GET AWAY! RAPE! RAPE! RAPE!!!!!!!!!!!!”
26. When its time for the pledge of allegiance, while everyone says it, yell out random things (Pickle, yaoi, butsecks, manwhore, jashin, pepto bismol, etc.) and mess everyone up.
27. Walk into class dancing the Macarena XD
28. Tell your teacher you heard the other teachers talking about him/her in the teachers lounge lol
29.During an exam, act like you need help really badly. (wave to the teacher, say psssst a lot, jump in your seat, act like your trying to land a plane etc.)
30. When you graduate, hug your teacher and say, “I’M GONNA MISS YOU SOOOOOOO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
31. When you’re an adult, look up your old teacher ina phone book. Then go to their house in the middle of the night. Sneak up by their bed, Give him/her a twisted and demented look and say “Heh….I’m back….MUAHAHAHA!”

This might get you in detention, expelsion, suspension, exportation, and posibly future jail time so don't say I didn't warn you.
If you laughed at this or have done at least one of them, copy and paste it on your profile.

40 ways to annoy Edward Cullen

1. Lock him in a room with all his fangirls. See how long he survives.
2. Continueously remind him that he lost Bella to a dog.
3. While he's sleeping badazzle all his clothes. Bonus points if you get ALL of his clothes (including underwear).
4. When he leaves paint his room pink and cover everything in sparkles, my little pony, and other girly shit.
5. Tell him Bella dumped him for Casper the friendly ghost.
6. While he's sleeping tattoo Stalker on his forehead.
7. Follow him around thinking Can you hear me now? Now? Now? Now? How bought now? And because only he and Bella are supose to know he can read minds he can't do anything.
8. Push Jacob onto Bella so that he is on top of her, take a picture, then show Edward. Tell him where Jacob currently is and follow him to see what happens.
9. Ask him in a cheesey british accent, "So are you a brit?"
10. Follow him around singing, "Crumpits and tea! Crumpits and tea!"
11. Make him listen to Justan Beiver for hours on end. Bonus points if you get him humming baby to himself.
12. Tie him to his bed and bring in the fangirls.
13. When he walks in annouce to everyone, "Look TinkerBell is here!"
14. Tell pita on him for sucking deer blood.
15. Ask why he's so far away from PixieHollow.
16. Give his fan girls an Edward tracker and see how far he gets until they catch up.
17. Kiss him with Bella around. Even funnier if she thinks he kissed you.
18. Put a letter in his mail box thanking him for subscribing to Pixie Cosmoes Swimsuit addition then tell Bella.
19: Stick a playboy magazen in his backpack and before he goes to Bella's tell her that you think he might be hiding porn. And watch her discover and possibly maul him.
20. Tell all the gay fan GUYS where he is and watch him get butt raped.
21. burn the Barney theme song, Dora the Explorer, or any other obnoxious childs song you can think of on all his music CDs.
22. Super glue Jacob to his back.
23. Follow him around thinking about a bunch of sex stories about him and Bella. :Edward: GAH! TOO DISTURBING!!! AHHH!!!!!!!
24. Do the above but it being about Jacob and Bella. :Edward: AHH! MY BRAIN'S MELTING! :Me: What brain?
25. Ask him if he's gotten gay with all the guys in Twilight, and Casper the friendly ghost, and the guys from MW2, and the guys from all the Disney Channel shows, and so on.
26. Kick him in the croch then say, "Oh wait there wasn't anything to kick." and walk away.
27. While he's hunting scare away all the deer and other animals he might try to eat.
28. Replace all his clothes with bright team Jacob outfits FOR GIRLS.
29. Tell him Bella is looking for him then lock him in a closet for a week or two. And when Bella IS looking for him then let him out.
30. Call him TinkerBell, Fawn, Silvermist, Rosetta, Iridessa, or any other fairy from the TinkerBell movies you can think of.
31. Ask him, "Hey do you have any pixie dust on you?"
32. Lock him in a cage so he can't hunt and feed him veggies.
33. Hand cuff him to Jacob.
34. Ask him any question and when he answers slap him across the face and shout, "LIAR!"
34. Sing 'Telephone' but replace I with Bella so it would end up like this, "Stop calling stop calling Bella doesn't want to talk anymore, left her head and her heart on the dance floor."
35. Tie him down to a bed upside down withut pants and bring in the gay twilight fans.
36. Dystroy his sterio.
37. Break all his CDs
38. Paint his car all rainbow then spraypaint, "I'm a magical fairy from PixieHollow!"
39: poke him.
40. Stare at him and when he blinks shout, "HAHA! I BEAT YOU!!!!
(If you laughed or are possibly gonna do these, copy and paste on your profile)

Easy combacks for women with men and their crap flirting...

Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.
Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.
Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today
Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?
Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together
Woman: Really, I'd put f and u together
(If you are a girl and will or did say one of these things, or if you're a guy and this was said to you before, copy and paste this on your profile)

Quotes of my OCs and Other characters... (Will have (OC) if I made them up)

"Come on you stupid piece of shit truck!" Weaver COD Black Ops
"No... I'm trying to lead you to the land of mystical cookies and rainbows. OF COURSE I'M TRYING TO TELL YOU SOMETHING!!!! Everyone's useless but me!" Irina (OC) COD MW2
"What the hell what that? Are you trying to guess us killed? Maintain a low profile!" Price COD MW2
"We have a nuclear missile launch! Code black! Code black!" Ghost COD MW2
"Shepard betrayed us." Soap COD MW2
"Vete a la mierda {go to hell}, you don't scare me." Gonzalo (OC) COD MW2
"You'd think being Russian would make you immune to the cold." Heatstroke (OC) COD MW2
"We don't permit beer on the barracks. Got it? THe last thing we need is a drunken yahoo with a gun running around the base." Scarab (OC) COD MW2
"It will be the end of the world... of War Craft." Some guy on South Park
"Smithers, release the hounds." Guy from Simpsons
"Whose the bigger fool? The fool, or the man who listen's to him?" Obi-Wan StarWars 4
"It's better to be pissed off then pissed on." Katie my friend
"Requiesce in Pace (Rest in Peace {Bad spelling in Itialian})" Ezio from AC Brotherhood
"I'm just peachy. Couldn't be better. In fact the sky's farting rainbows and I see magical pixies everywhere." Ramirez from one of my fanfics
"You steal another man wife and then go hide inside a fortress? Nothing hangs between your thighs. In fact there is hole there so deep it reaches into the maledetto inferno (fucking underworld)!!!!" Bartolomeo from Assassin's Creed Brotherhood
"Don't fucking swear! It's not fucking nice!" My friend Katie
"Someone my age, imbitchilie (jerk {More bad Italian spelling!})." Ezio from AC Brotherhood
"At least my name is worth it's curency! Unlike yours, which is counterfit!" Bartolomeo from AC Brotherhood

How sexy are you?

HOW SEXY IS YOUR NAME? add the letters in your first name using the numbers below =) And Write it at the bottom! And re-post it with "H0W SEXY iS UR NAME" *under 60 points= not too sexy *from 61-300 points= pretty sexy over 301-599 points=Super sexy!!! *beyond 600= Sex Goddesses!!!! A=100 B=14 C=9 D=28 E=145 F=12 G=3 H=10 I=100 J=100 K=114 L=100 M=25 N=450 O=80 P=2 Q=12 R=400 S=113 T=405 U=11 V=10 W=10 X=3 Y=210 Z=23 Don't 4get to add ya name at tha bottom!!! 1. giulia- 43 i'm ugly 2. chayna-56 i'm ugly 3. Corrina - 50... 4. Andrea- 39... 5. Melissa-37... 6. Samantha-49 7. VANESSA-41 8. Brandon-40 9. LOREN- 40 10. Annfrancis-75 11. Valery-64 12. victor-46 13. Laura-230...ehh thats pretty good. 14.Cami- 99 15. Savannah 358!! HOlY SHiT! 16. Jessica- 676 17. Marlene-389 18.angela328 hell yea!! 19. Tyler 20.Christina1887 DAMN!!!!!!! 21.Michael 589 22. Laira- 900, i am just good like that 23. Kristina- 1982 (Tina- 1155) 24. paige: 450 hmmm pretty good 25. john: 640 very very sexy 26. RAchel: 764 very very very sexy 27. Rain: 1150 beyond very very very sexy 28.chico-308 29.Kasha--447 ehehe 30.Devon-693, beyond very very very sexy 31.Princess--992, im beyond verry verry sexy!!!!!!!... i just got it like that 32.Ashley--whoohwoo 678 i beaurtiful that liek wayyyy beyond sexy 33.Gabby:341, hum, i kno my name sexy, shit cuz im sexy!!!!!!!!!!lol 34.MANUEL--831 BEYOND SEXY BITCHES 35.SUPERMAN AKA MICHAEL--1,246 SO IM FUCKIN INCREDIBLY SEXY SHIT GOD DAMN SO GIRLS GET AT ME 36.LINENA--1,445 IM VERY VERY VERY VERY SEXXY AND DAM GOOD LOOKING. 37.Cathy--734 Im verry verry verry sexy!!!! 38.terrell--1695 im very very very very sexy!!!! 39. Latifa1062 from my head count but who those im just way 2 sexy 2 count this bullshit! 40.jerry...1,255 41. Karissa Aka DiAmOnD BaBaY- 1130.. Damn im beyond sexy!!! true story!!! 42. Mark--639= beyond verry verry verry sexy!!!! 43. CIARA= beyond verry verry verry sexy!!!!!!!!!!!!! 44. Samantha-1303..not true...(Sami-438..still not true) 45.theresa-1318..not true at all-beyond ver verry very sexy 46.krissy 1150 pretty damn sexy* 47.Genevieve 1253 48. Angela - 898 49.Alayna-1060 ya just gotta luv me! 50.Kaile- 659 51.Zina- 773 ooooo i'm sexy! 52.rebecca822 beyond very very very very very sexy and im pretty dam good lookin 53. LAURA!!!-711! yay me!!!!!!!! 54. BRANDY-1202!!! OH YEAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!! 55.satina 1368 IM SEXY!!!! 56. Madison - 996 HELLZ YEAHZ!! 57.Dagrun 982..muhahh...at least my name is sexy...i know i know wierd name...(im not from america) 58. Margret, 1478 HELL YEAH beyond verry verry verry sexy!!!! damn it took me almost 5 minutes to do math on this, cause I dont have this stupid calculating thing in my comp. 59. Sarajevo1038. long names are super sexxxxxy 60. Natalie1095...woah thatz cool 61.) Lauren1206My Name is Beyond Verrry Verrry Verrry Sexy 62.emily680 thats beyond very very sexy 63.Gina-753*that'z beyond verry verry verry sexy!!!! 64.Arain1250super sexy baby!! 65.Amanda830-oh yea al right-woho! 66.Marina-1275 HELL YAH IM FUKIN SEXY AS HELL! 67.Tiffany-1479 booya im sexy!! 68. Melissa- 769, woop-woop!! XD (WildFreek woz 'ere...) 69. Angel 798 YEAH!! and the number i am has to be good too right? xD 69 x] 70.Kyliejean1564 FUCK YEA!!!!!!!!!!! im happy now!!!! =*371.EmilyRose1418 Superr Duperrr Sexxiee ] damnn I feel like a Goddess :D 71. Cassie- 680 *happy dance* 72. Eloise - *783* Woo Hoo! xD 73. Katie 964Hell yeah! XD apparently I'mveryvery verysexy! 3 lulz! XD 74. Dana678apparently im beyond verry verry verry sexyXD 75.Lilliandelrisa2,036 Ohhh...my...god...IM SEXY!!!!! 76. Richard 1047 lolz apperently im incredibly sexy lolz 77. adrianna) i got 1728 beat dat!!! 78. Brittany I did I gt 2,084 top score!!!! Wat wat! Yeah! 79. Meghan 733 wow, did a lot better than i thought, im sexy! so back off bitches! 80.Giselle-- Im SEXY ! 703 ! Never thought i'd score this high ! 81. Emily-- Im sexy! 580! I didn't think my name was all that great. 82.Thalia815 wow!I never thought I was THAT good =3(is good to have strange names) 83.Elaine - 1040 (..wow..) 84.Simone - 913[ DAMN I'M A SEXY CHICK BITCHIES!!! :D] 85. Merlissa-1096 (AWW YEAH! LUVIN MY NAME!!) 86. Courtney- 1710 Wow. Didn't know I was this sexy ;) (Blade4923) 87.Melissa-696, wow, I'm a sexy goddess. 88. Rebecca-822 OH YEAH I'M A F*CKING GODESS!!! Worship me!
-If you got a result you are happy with, copy and paste on your profile-

Well you know you are truely a noob if you went along and read EVERY last thing on my profile.

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Ishbal War by Silvery Mist reviews
They joined the military in hopes of protecting and helping the people of Amestris. They never thought they would end up killing them instead. Royai and other pairings.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 24 - Words: 86,689 - Reviews: 114 - Favs: 96 - Follows: 121 - Updated: 11/18/2015 - Published: 2/25/2009 - Maes H., Riza H., Roy M., Rebecca C.
The Force's Negotiator by TheBlackHand724 reviews
Another "Obi-Wan get killed only to wake up back in time" story, Summery: Obi-Wan is facing Darth Vador on the death star. He's tired an has reached the end of his line, but the Force isn't done with him yet and Obi-Wan is really not going to like this.
Star Wars - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 5 - Words: 23,493 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 196 - Follows: 133 - Updated: 6/26/2014 - Published: 11/11/2011 - Obi-Wan K. - Complete
The Witch of Jura by StoryGardener reviews
Kirk's task is to observe the invasion of Jura. As usual, things don't go quite as planned and it is up to McCoy to keep them alive, on the run. Hurt!Jim in a medieval setting. No slash. COMPLETE!
StarTrek: The Original Series - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Adventure - Chapters: 32 - Words: 37,333 - Reviews: 109 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 50 - Updated: 3/1/2014 - Published: 1/14/2013 - J. Kirk, L. McCoy - Complete
The Official List of Unofficial Rules by Saphura reviews
When a new crew member joins the Enterprise, they are sent a set of rules they won't find anywhere else.
StarTrek: The Original Series - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 83 - Words: 58,520 - Reviews: 1316 - Favs: 382 - Follows: 328 - Updated: 2/17/2014 - Published: 12/2/2010
An Assassin's Revenge by Tiger-Cub684 reviews
It was an ordinary night of gaming, when suddenly, Altair has enough of my non-existant skills and decides to teach me a lesson, Assassin style. How the hell is this happening? Warning: possible course language
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 35 - Words: 98,584 - Reviews: 455 - Favs: 261 - Follows: 271 - Updated: 2/11/2014 - Published: 11/23/2009 - Altaïr, Malik
Grayson's Run by Aconitum-Napellus reviews
Spock, amnesiac and lost in time, wakes in post-WWI England with only the clothes he wears and a strange black object that he believes is important. He is being hunted, but he doesn't know how or why.
StarTrek: The Original Series - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 15 - Words: 31,430 - Reviews: 108 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 34 - Updated: 11/4/2013 - Published: 7/24/2013 - Spock - Complete
Lost Sock by Reyka Sivao reviews
"And that, sir, is how I lost my lost right shoe and my left sock."
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,516 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 4 - Published: 8/16/2013 - Führer Bradley, Riza H., Roy M. - Complete
Just Like Old Times by axel.lea.gaz reviews
What happens when the SAS gets sent an X-box, and they play their own game! T for language and other T rated stuff. WILL have spoilers. After months, a new chapter is here! Review if ya want!
Call of Duty - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 13,268 - Reviews: 100 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 8/7/2013 - Published: 5/25/2010
1,000,001 Shells by Elira Rose reviews
Just a parody about what I think would happen after the Dovahkiin dies...and is confronted by the group of figures who all say they have claim to her in the afterlife.
Elder Scroll series - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,799 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 105 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 6/20/2013 - Published: 6/17/2012 - Dragonborn/Dovahkiin, Sheogorath - Complete
If not an assassin, then what? by Ignobilis reviews
An alternate universe version of Ezio's story that's asks questions like - What if he was afraid of heights? What if he was terribly unfit? What if he was painfully shy and had "issues"? Would it have been better for him if he were "normal"?
Assassin's Creed - Rated: M - English - Drama/Spiritual - Chapters: 9 - Words: 26,153 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 5/24/2013 - Published: 8/5/2011 - Ezio A., Leonardo da Vinci
101 Ways To Kill Jar Jar Binks by Ohfortheloveofpete reviews
Anakin Skywalker is sick and tired of putting up with Jar Jar Binks and his obnoxious behavior...so he's decided to put him to death over and over again! Inspired by another character-bashing story 101 Ways To Kill Scrappy...
Star Wars - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 101 - Words: 95,748 - Reviews: 337 - Favs: 74 - Follows: 38 - Updated: 5/18/2013 - Published: 10/22/2011 - Jar Jar B. - Complete
Past Tense by Closet Scrawler reviews
Spock and McCoy find themselves trapped in Iowa's past, chasing down a Romulan assassin. -Not Slash-
StarTrek: The Original Series - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 10 - Words: 34,986 - Reviews: 65 - Favs: 65 - Follows: 49 - Updated: 4/17/2013 - Published: 4/2/2011 - L. McCoy, Spock - Complete
Through The Mirror Darkly by Fawlke reviews
Re-Write of the episode 'Mirror, Mirror' Kirk and McCoy find themselves transported to a world where everyone and everything they have ever known is different. In this barbaric world will they manage to get home and will they find anyone willing to help them? Not SLASH. Complete.
StarTrek: The Original Series - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 10 - Words: 14,105 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 1 - Published: 3/23/2013 - J. Kirk, Spock - Complete
Perfect Timing by Everest Legionnaire reviews
What if Captain Price had warned Ghost of Shepherd's betrayal in time?
Call of Duty - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 9 - Words: 17,044 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 45 - Follows: 54 - Updated: 3/1/2013 - Published: 11/14/2011 - Ghost, Gary Sanderson/Roach
Death to the MarySues! by Numbuh1367 reviews
A Mission to destroy horrible OCs :edit: New Harry Potter Chp.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,373 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 1/31/2013 - Published: 6/19/2012 - Altaïr, Malik
Snapped by FirstNobody reviews
We know Roach to be a young, clumsy, funny, and lovable man of the Task Force, but what if something so terrible happened that it finally made him snap?
Call of Duty - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Suspense - Chapters: 12 - Words: 14,000 - Reviews: 78 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 28 - Updated: 1/5/2013 - Published: 9/14/2011 - Gary Sanderson/Roach, Ghost
Morning! by JustAnotherRandomWriter reviews
Altair and Ezio find themselves in someones living room...Ezio is tormented by an alarm clock, and Altair is mocked by a freezer. Please R&R, this will just be a bunch of one-shots, introducing the Assassins slowly to the modern world
Assassin's Creed - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 14 - Words: 12,250 - Reviews: 87 - Favs: 73 - Follows: 78 - Updated: 11/19/2012 - Published: 10/27/2011 - Altaïr, Ezio A.
The Roman Rappers by JGT-298 reviews
Leonardo and Salai get entrusted with the Apple while Ezio was being chased by a regiment of Borgia diehards. Little do both of them know that they will uncover one of it's many secrets.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: K - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 7 - Words: 11,913 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 11/1/2012 - Published: 2/27/2012 - Ezio A., Leonardo da Vinci
Good Morning, Mr Spock by qenie reviews
Spock greets his fellow crewpersons as he begins his day.
StarTrek: The Original Series - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 525 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 1 - Published: 10/27/2012 - Spock - Complete
Tartaruga by Spirit the Fire Dragon reviews
Ezio Auditore has gone missing in the blink of an eye, disappearing like smoke before the Brotherhood's eyes. Leonardo da Vinci was the last to speak to him, the one willing to go to any lengths to find and bring him home. Even as far as to betray the Brotherhood if that is what needs to be done. /previously Inventing Betrayal/
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Drama/Suspense - Chapters: 4 - Words: 10,640 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 7/15/2012 - Published: 7/3/2012 - Leonardo da Vinci, Ezio A.
С нами Бог by FirstNobody reviews
He thought he made the right choice by trying to save someone who needed to be saved…and all that stood in his way was a few guards and a fall from 200ft, but he didn't care. Though, what he didn't expect was to bring his teammates down with him.
Call of Duty - Rated: T - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 19 - Words: 32,332 - Reviews: 171 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 7/7/2012 - Published: 1/3/2012 - Sgt. Derek Westbrook/Frost - Complete
The Pains of Fatherhood by Redstrikerborg reviews
A look at what it might have been like to juggle the Order and being a parent at the same time. -ON HIATUS
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 3 - Words: 7,084 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 7/6/2012 - Published: 2/3/2012 - Altaïr, Maria T.
Scumbag Assassin! by Arhani 'Hanny' Daforcena reviews
Inspired by the "Scumbag Assassin" memes on the Internet, this series of drabbles follows the misadventures of the beloved Assassin Mentor, Ezio Auditore, through the eyes and perspective of the people that he works so hard to liberate from oppression, where they notice strange things about their surroundings... or were they expertly hidden Assassin logistics?
Assassin's Creed - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 5,379 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 7/4/2012 - Published: 6/10/2012 - Ezio A., Niccolò Machiavelli
Rabbit Clan: I Learned it the Hard Way by MdisasterM reviews
MOVED see inside for details
Warriors - Rated: M - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 80 - Reviews: 134 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 6/30/2012 - Published: 12/27/2011
Roots by Kovitlac reviews
A young Yusuf Tazim grows up and finds his place amongst the Assassins of Constantinople. UNFINISHED. Pre/During ACR. Please R/R
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Drama/Friendship - Chapters: 21 - Words: 51,580 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 6/22/2012 - Published: 12/26/2011 - Yusuf T. - Complete
How to train your Assassin by rivendellelve reviews
Ever wanted to have your own assassin? This simple guide will help you deal with the most common problems concerning assassins.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 808 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 37 - Follows: 2 - Published: 5/15/2012 - Complete
Coffee by SicariusAquila reviews
A cup of coffee, Antonio, and gingerbread lead to an unexpected turn of events. CRACK
Assassin's Creed - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 780 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/17/2012 - Antonio, Ezio A.
Rain by toeki reviews
When rain is coming, Malik always waits for Altair. But this time, the rain brings memories instead. warning: character death
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,349 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 5 - Published: 4/15/2012 - Malik, Altaïr - Complete
Those Darn Shippings! by Kleptomite reviews
Me poking fun at all the shippings of Star Wars. From Anakin/Padme to Shaak Ti/Grievous and even Sidious/Mace Windu all ships are allowed. WARNING: strong language and dirty humor, proceed with caution. NOW WITH SPECIAL KOTOR PAIRINGS.
Star Wars - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 23 - Words: 41,529 - Reviews: 137 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 4/12/2012 - Published: 5/31/2010 - Complete
Ask Altair! by iguanablogger reviews
EXPIRED. Thank you all for participating! Please visit the poll at Iguanablogger's profile to vote for the next Ask fiction letter. POLL EXPIRES APRIL 18TH.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Mystery - Chapters: 19 - Words: 19,667 - Reviews: 118 - Favs: 44 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 4/1/2012 - Published: 1/4/2012 - Altaïr
Alis Aquilae by I'm Iller reviews
Ficlets of Ezio with his eaglet novices.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: K - English - Family/Adventure - Chapters: 5 - Words: 6,387 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 17 - Published: 3/31/2012 - Ezio A., Apprentice
Rescue, Recover, Resist by FlyHighGirl reviews
Constantinople. Yusuf is nowhere to be found. A zip line is broken. Guards are on high alert. What are they hiding? Is Yusuf hurt? And if so, can he sit still long enough to recover? That last one is probably a no, knowing that clown.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Humor/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 6 - Words: 6,427 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 2/20/2012 - Published: 1/17/2012 - Ezio A., Yusuf T.
Three, Two! by BADAZZtoldya reviews
You don't wake Malik up at five in the morning, it's just common sense at that point.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 4 - Words: 2,836 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 37 - Follows: 22 - Updated: 1/25/2012 - Published: 6/27/2011 - Malik, Altaïr
The Masyaf Metalheads by JGT-298 reviews
Altair has been keeping something from the order. Maria doesn't know what it is and sends Malik to keep an eye on her husband, but she won't like the outcome.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: K - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 5 - Words: 4,347 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 1/24/2012 - Published: 12/28/2011 - Altaïr, Malik - Complete
Virus by lilydipper reviews
During a retreat Anakin is given a deadly virus that is now threatening his life. Meanwhile, Ahsoka is dealing with the fact that she might lose her master.
Star Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Friendship - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,805 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 27 - Updated: 1/12/2012 - Published: 11/16/2011 - Ahsoka T., Obi-Wan K.
Road to Recovery by YappiChick reviews
"I would advise that you not to underestimate Soap," Price gritted, his cigar still clinched between his teeth. "He will be fine." Set during the beginning of MW3
Call of Duty - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,184 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/3/2012 - Cpt. John Price, MacTavish/Soap - Complete
The Dorm Room: a Chronicle of Spock and Kirk by Lizzie Foster reviews
What if Spock and Kirk had met at Starfleet Academy? And, more importantly, what if they had been roommates? Hilarity and the occasional fistfight ensues as Spock realizes that Kirk's favorite pastime is not studying; it's playing pranks. Not slashy
StarTrek: The Original Series - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship/Humor - Chapters: 14 - Words: 14,712 - Reviews: 92 - Favs: 90 - Follows: 48 - Updated: 12/30/2011 - Published: 7/11/2009 - Spock - Complete
While you were sleeping by ineedanewnameidk reviews
Inspired by the artwork from doubleleaf, this is just a quick writing of Altair cleaning and bandaging Malik's arm shortly after the amputation of it. He does it while Malik sleeps, since he wouldn't have allowed it otherwise. Rated M for gore/wounds.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,736 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/30/2011 - Altaïr, Malik - Complete
Adventures of a Secret Task Force by cosmo17 reviews
Friendly one shot drabbles, set between COD4 and MW2. Takes place with Task Force 141, friendship building and random moments on and off the battlefield. Rated T for minor language and whatnot.
Call of Duty - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 5,827 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 12/15/2011 - Published: 11/2/2011 - Gary Sanderson/Roach, Ghost
Scary 'Stache by cosmo17 reviews
Price has some personal mustache problems! One-Shot
Call of Duty - Rated: K - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 508 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/6/2011 - Cpt. John Price, MacTavish/Soap - Complete
We Are Blood Brother's by Amethyst98 reviews
The mission had been simple : Take down Makarov at the hotel Lustig and put a permanent stop to this madness for good. However, it did not turn out that way at all. -temporary summary as suggested by reviewers : - COMPLETE :D
Call of Duty - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,442 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 11/27/2011 - Published: 11/8/2011 - MacTavish/Soap, Cpt. John Price - Complete
Lucky Gundarks by ruth baulding reviews
You fell into that nightmare, master. And I rescued you...remember?
Star Wars - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,988 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 63 - Follows: 3 - Published: 11/24/2011 - Anakin Skywalker, Obi-Wan K. - Complete
Whoo! Force Lightning by MusingWordsmith reviews
Emperor Palpatine is puzzled by a man scooting across the carpet in his socks. When he asks about it, he gets a shock. Literally.
Star Wars - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 166 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 5 - Published: 11/22/2011 - E. Palpatine - Complete
The Other Version Of Star Wars by Alderaan Girl reviews
I asked my friend to make a short summary of Star Wars and she never even watched it. It ended up really funny, enjoy.
Star Wars - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 919 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 2 - Published: 11/22/2011 - Luke S., Leia O., Darth Vader, Chewbacca - Complete
Initiate Evaluation by Count Mallet reviews
My first story posted on Fanfiction·net. In this speculative one-shot, Master Yoda asks Shaak Ti to evaluate the Clawmouse Clan initiates and their progress after their first year of Jedi instruction. Upon learning that clan member Ahsoka Tano is a fellow Togruta, Master Ti chooses to interview her first. Safe for all ages with no objectionable content. [S2-F1-O1]
Star Wars - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,620 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 5 - Published: 11/6/2011 - Yoda, Plo K., Shaak Ti, Ahsoka T. - Complete
Halloween night by DoubleEO reviews
Obi-Wan and Anakin are planning for Halloween night.
Star Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 964 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 2 - Published: 10/31/2011 - Anakin Skywalker, Obi-Wan K.
Prank Wars by Emily 'Gadget' Robins reviews
It all started with Gadget sitting innocently in the Rec. Room. It turned into an all out war that is rapidly growing. With the teammates pitted against eachother in 'mortal' combat how are rivals Gadget and Ghost going to celebrate their anniversary? GxG
Call of Duty - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,670 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 10/20/2011 - Published: 6/14/2011
Crimson & Clover by heymissallie reviews
What defined the 141's mighty captain? What if overworked MacTavish's rough-and-rugged heart used to be as fragile as a civilian's? What if Roach and Ghost decide to invade his privacy for the sake of curiosity? COMPLETE.
Call of Duty - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 13 - Words: 27,098 - Reviews: 59 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 9/28/2011 - Published: 5/20/2011 - MacTavish/Soap, Ghost - Complete
How to annoy the clans possibly to insanity by The Little Lost Time Lord reviews
Two cats. One mission. A whole lot of trouble for the clans. rated T for possible things
Warriors - Rated: T - English - Humor/Tragedy - Chapters: 11 - Words: 8,475 - Reviews: 46 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 8/22/2011 - Published: 11/26/2010
Adopted by Kyuohki reviews
Apple-shenanigans. Ezio is shrunk and gains new appendages - he needs to find Leonardo and somehow change back. But there are challenges on the way, and Ezio beginning to be distracted by many of his new instincts.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 6 - Words: 15,697 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 43 - Updated: 8/21/2011 - Published: 5/6/2011 - Ezio A., Leonardo da Vinci
Call of Duty by Lil black dog reviews
When Spock is injured on a landing party gone wrong, it becomes a race to save his life. Against Kirk's wishes, McCoy comes up with an unconventional solution to the problem which may cost him his life as well.
StarTrek: The Original Series - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 12,536 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 64 - Follows: 6 - Published: 8/17/2011 - Spock, L. McCoy - Complete
Birds Have Wings by Novoux reviews
There, across the street on top of a tavern was Malfatto, flailing around and screaming drunkenly what vaguely sounded like "I'M A BIRD!"
Assassin's Creed - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,606 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/30/2011 - Doctor, Blacksmith, Barber - Complete
Call Of Duty Final War by Ladnir reviews
Continuation from Modern Warfare 2; in this fanfic, Amy Sanderson, Roach's sister, looks for Soap to know who killed her brother. This fic contains strong languaje and violence...
Call of Duty - Rated: M - English - Suspense/Humor - Chapters: 15 - Words: 31,821 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 7/12/2011 - Published: 7/8/2011 - MacTavish/Soap, Vladimir Makarov
Why Her? by Papery reviews
"You want your daughter back?" Cesare asked, dangling Elia's freedom on a string in front of Ezio's face. "You know what the arrangement is." Rated T for suggestive themes and such. Click for more of a summary! :D
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Adventure - Chapters: 8 - Words: 22,722 - Reviews: 66 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 7/9/2011 - Published: 6/10/2011 - Ezio A. - Complete
Bah Bah Black Sheep by CyndarDragon reviews
No one expected Altair to get killed, but no one also expected his spirit to linger. Malik and a fellow novice must try to free Altair from Earth, but with all three of their souls getting thrown back and forth from a hellish dimension, sanity is a worry.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Horror/Suspense - Chapters: 9 - Words: 16,021 - Reviews: 49 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 7/5/2011 - Published: 12/26/2010 - Altaïr, Malik
How to Lose Your Yeerk in 3 days Or Less! by Mysterious Prophetess reviews
How one controller was able to drive Yeerks crazy without resorting to chemical means! One shot. Crack-fic-ish. R&R
Animorphs - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 847 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 1 - Published: 3/18/2011 - Complete
Broken by Tayy.Babe reviews
**SPOILERS If you havent played AC: Brotherhood do NOT continue!** After losing the love of his life, Desmond is kidnapped. It's just like Abstergo. He's in the the dark with no ally. The question is " Who kidnapped Desmond?" And " What do they want?"
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 19 - Words: 28,296 - Reviews: 98 - Favs: 65 - Follows: 36 - Updated: 2/23/2011 - Published: 12/28/2010 - Desmond M., Lucy S. - Complete
Guitar by Dunedain789 reviews
When Meat receives a guitar from his sister, what will Roach, Ghost and MacTavish do! Small one-shot
Call of Duty - Rated: K - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,599 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 2 - Published: 2/15/2011 - Gary Sanderson/Roach, MacTavish/Soap
In the Bed of the Highlander by dryskim reviews
It's Christmas time for the 141, and Roach decides to get Soap a very spicy present.Just something I tossed together in an afternoon. Read and Review! -Warning- Sexual references abound!
Call of Duty - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,436 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 15 - Published: 12/26/2010 - MacTavish/Soap, Gary Sanderson/Roach - Complete
Time to get up by BardDown reviews
Ghost has some trouble waking MacTavish. Christmas one-shot.
Call of Duty - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 500 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 5 - Published: 10/10/2010 - Ghost, MacTavish/Soap - Complete
High school never ends by BardDown reviews
Our three favorite call of duty characters, but in high school!
Call of Duty - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 388 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 6 - Published: 9/23/2010 - Ghost, MacTavish/Soap
Snowday by BardDown reviews
The base takes a snow day.
Call of Duty - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 371 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 2 - Published: 9/14/2010 - Ghost, MacTavish/Soap
Cockroach by Skybot4 reviews
Roach just had to open his big mouth and say it.
Call of Duty - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,158 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 10 - Published: 6/12/2010 - Gary Sanderson/Roach - Complete
If Dr Seuss Wrote For Star Trek TOS by MinervaDeannaBond reviews
Ever think about how funny it would be if Dr. Seuss wrote an episode of the Original Series? Well, here you go! Enjoy!
StarTrek: The Original Series - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 935 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 70 - Follows: 7 - Published: 10/2/2009 - J. Kirk, Spock - Complete
How to deal with a tired AvianHybrid by Tears of Eternal Darkness reviews
One-shot. Fang thought today was going to be different; peaceful, quiet... he was wrong. Max really isn't a morning person.
Maximum Ride - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,647 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/3/2009 - Fang, Max - Complete
Twisted Life of Star Wars by TwinsOfMischief reviews
Yoda is gay and is in loveobsessed with MaceWindu. ObiWan is a girl and has the hots for QuiGon who doesnt know about her gender, and R2D2 is somewhere in the mix. Chocolate Mousse fetish, candy fetish fruitish trolls OH MY!
Star Wars - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 3,631 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 12/31/2006 - Published: 7/10/2006 - Obi-Wan K., Qui-Gon J.
An Odd Comment by Misti Wolan reviews
While in a Council meeting, something Yoda says strikes Tahl as odd.
Jedi Apprentice - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 346 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 2 - Published: 3/17/2005 - Complete
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It's Freaky Friday reviews
What happens when Spock and McCoy have themselves a little Freaky Friday experience? Especially when said experience happens during a delegate transport mission and in order to keep everyone calm they need to act like nothing's up. Can they switch back before they're found out or will this ruin the negotiations? Based very heavily off of Freaky Friday. -No Slash-
StarTrek: The Original Series - Rated: T - English - Parody/Friendship - Chapters: 3 - Words: 6,450 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 8/7/2013 - Published: 7/24/2013 - L. McCoy, Spock
Eaglets of a Nest reviews
Altair and Malik were even children once.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship/Drama - Chapters: 8 - Words: 13,289 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 6/12/2013 - Published: 8/8/2012 - Altaïr, Malik
This Monster I Have Become reviews
When a monster emerges upon the city of Rome, the recruits are absolutely defenseless. The worst part is that Ezio is nowhere to be found. Did I meant that of all the people to capture the beast, it just so happened to be Cesare Borgia? WARNING: Blood and gore ahead
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Horror/Suspense - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,950 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 2/3/2013 - Published: 1/17/2013 - Ezio A., Apprentice
AC High School reviews
Vidic gets his hands on a Piece of Eden, and then what? He royally messes up and turns everything he knows into a High School. Does this change anyone's lives? And how can this be changed back to normal?
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 30 - Words: 47,398 - Reviews: 62 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 35 - Updated: 12/26/2012 - Published: 7/23/2012 - Warren V., Ezio A.
You Novice! reviews
I've somehow found my way into this fandom, now Malik must put up with my behavour and try to straighten me out as best he can.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 37 - Words: 49,149 - Reviews: 41 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 12/22/2012 - Published: 4/2/2012 - Malik, Altaïr
The Hoarder reviews
My Character. She's a Dark Elf with a dark secret. She hoards skulls. Read for tips on how to be a crazy skull hoarder!
Elder Scroll series - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,044 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 2 - Published: 10/28/2012 - Dragonborn/Dovahkiin, Lydia - Complete
Smarrito reviews
"We hadn't seen him since that." This seemed to hit Ezio like a war hammer to the chest. And for a minute, it seemed like he had just stopped breathing, he shook himself out of the shock and nodded. "Then stay where you are. I'll see if I can find him." "Gazie, but I don't think you will find anything," the thief sighed. "I'll make sure I do," Ezio replied as he walked out.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Suspense/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,642 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 9/30/2012 - Published: 7/16/2012 - Ezio A., La Volpe
Always Listen To Your Elders reviews
When Yusuf doesn't take Ezio's warning seriously, he finds himself in a difficult situation.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Humor/Suspense - Chapters: 16 - Words: 23,094 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 8/29/2012 - Published: 2/16/2012 - Yusuf T., Ezio A.
We Stand Together reviews
A bunch of short stories about the recruits, because even they need some love too. T for swears, violence, bad humor, and such.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 4 - Words: 3,460 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 7/18/2012 - Published: 7/7/2012 - Apprentice, Ezio A.
Someday A Hatchling Must Stretch It's Wings reviews
"It was all his fault. He shouldn't have hurt her..." Random fic for the sake of a fic. Decided to make a modern day OC timewarp thing to see the big deal. T for blood, gore, swearing, and some adultish themes that aren't too bad. You have been warned.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Suspense/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 7 - Words: 12,473 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 3/1/2012 - Published: 1/20/2012 - Malik, Altaïr
It's Impossible Right? reviews
A rewrite of There's No Way. Soap discovers something he never thought would have ever happened. How is this even possible? Please R&R. T for swearing and maybe other reasons.
Call of Duty - Rated: T - English - Angst/Family - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,491 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 1/26/2012 - Published: 12/31/2011 - MacTavish/Soap, Cpt. John Price
لا أتذكر reviews
When Malik goes missing, Altair has to go to Jerusalem and look for him. Little does he know that the man will be harder to find than he first thought.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Mystery/Suspense - Chapters: 4 - Words: 3,706 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 1/18/2012 - Published: 1/15/2012 - Altaïr, Malik
Blood Brothers reviews
Warning: There are spoilers to MW3, don't read if you haven't played or heard what happens. Soap should be dead. Price saw it. But is it possible that he never actually left them? Written to How To Save a Life by The Fray.
Call of Duty - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Supernatural - Chapters: 17 - Words: 18,083 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 1/6/2012 - Published: 12/3/2011 - MacTavish/Soap, Cpt. John Price - Complete
This Means War reviews
When Meat's little joke on Archer goes horribly wrong, he leaves Roach with the blame and a revenge bent Ghost after him. Everyone is soon to get involved in the prank war. Inspired by the other fic Prank War, just felt like doing one without OCs.
Call of Duty - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 6 - Words: 12,951 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 1/1/2012 - Published: 12/16/2011 - Gary Sanderson/Roach, Ghost
Christmas for the TF141. Roach gets to handle with a grumpy Ghost and expects some family later. T for swears.
Call of Duty - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,565 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/24/2011 - Gary Sanderson/Roach
Need a hand? reviews
Sometimes you have to let others help you. Obi-Wan doesn't think so. Now Anakin will have to make him see the healers. But little does he know that this situation will only go out of hand fast. oh joy... Please R&R! Changed to T due to violence and blood.
Star Wars - Rated: T - English - Humor/Suspense - Chapters: 22 - Words: 19,831 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 11/22/2011 - Published: 11/1/2011 - Obi-Wan K., Anakin Skywalker
If Star Wars Was Morphed reviews
George Lucus is kiddnapped? By WATTO! This can only mean ONE thing! STAR WARS IS ABOUT TO GET MESSED UP! T for possible swears as well as not so childish humor.
Star Wars - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,153 - Reviews: 1 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 11/7/2011 - Published: 11/3/2011
Negotiations reviews
So how does someone like Dooku get two arguing planets to agree?
Star Wars - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 393 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/5/2011 - Qui-Gon J., Count Dooku - Complete
Rambling Rovers reviews
Sometimes it's the simple things that matter when someone is drunk. K because I wouldn't say it's completely childish, but it's not T rated either.
Star Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,294 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 11/2/2011 - Qui-Gon J. - Complete
What they didn't bother to show us reviews
Just a bunch of silly screw ups from the characters as they continue to mess up the scenes in different ways besides the already seen bloopers.
Star Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,557 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 5 - Updated: 11/1/2011 - Published: 10/30/2011
Not Your Average Mission reviews
You know something's wrong when: Mace Windu's acting strange, you're being sent to an unheard of planet, and the mission envolves a killer who leaves their victims drained of blood. It could mean nothing. But where this is going, that doesn't seem likely.
Star Wars - Rated: T - English - Mystery/Suspense - Chapters: 5 - Words: 5,681 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 2 - Published: 10/31/2011 - Qui-Gon J., Obi-Wan K.
Go Back To Bed Now reviews
Anakin needs to learn to let himself heal.
Star Wars - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 529 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 5 - Published: 10/29/2011 - Anakin Skywalker, Obi-Wan K. - Complete
Just get in there reviews
A little Ezio Altair snd Desmond moment. As well as more random moments and skits.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 29 - Words: 19,386 - Reviews: 77 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 36 - Updated: 10/17/2011 - Published: 6/1/2011 - Ezio A., Altaïr
A Broken Heart reviews
Ezio turns up at Leonardo's terribly injuried, but more worryingly in shock of something. But Leonardo is willing to find out what.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 2,777 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 10/12/2011 - Published: 7/26/2011 - Leonardo da Vinci, Ezio A.
Half Light reviews
When Ezio goes to recruit a new civilian to the Brotherhood, something goes terribly wrong that leaves the person wounded for life.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 13 - Words: 12,613 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 10/11/2011 - Published: 9/14/2011 - Ezio A., Apprentice
Embers reviews
Much older now, Ezio has left the creed and started a family. Now his only worries are if he made the right choices in life. Story based on the actual short movie Assassins Creed: Ember. I didn't come up with this. Look it up.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Family/Suspense - Chapters: 8 - Words: 6,798 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 10/2/2011 - Published: 9/8/2011 - Ezio A. - Complete
Long Days reviews
After returning from a mission on the other side of Italy, Ezio returns feeling horrible. But of course, he still has work to do back in Rome.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,920 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 5 - Published: 9/7/2011 - Ezio A. - Complete
The Simple Details reviews
It's just drawing, right? Slight one-sided slash. WARNING: one swear...
Assassin's Creed - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 751 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 2 - Published: 9/4/2011 - Ezio A., Leonardo da Vinci - Complete
Attack of dah music memes! reviews
A little jumble of music memes. Used to be called Please don't go. But now I give you a bunch of memes! And the Genres and Categories are changed because the one shots are varied.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,693 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Updated: 9/1/2011 - Published: 8/16/2011
Situazioni Awkward reviews
What do you do when you wake up one morning and realize that you've just been genderbent? Go find your best friend, who turns out to be Leonardo da Vinci, of course so he can fix it! T for swearing and possibly slight sexiness. .
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 30 - Words: 24,592 - Reviews: 56 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 8/31/2011 - Published: 7/19/2011 - Ezio A.
How Did You Find Me? reviews
Had the idea for quite some time. "Where have you brought me?" "Nowhere Messere. A man left you here."
Assassin's Creed - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 898 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/10/2011 - Niccolò Machiavelli, Ezio A. - Complete
A Word of the Wise reviews
La Volpe shares a little advise with his fellow thieves.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 280 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 5 - Published: 7/26/2011 - La Volpe, Thief - Complete
Non Riesco a Ricordare reviews
In a fight with the guards, Ezio seems to have suffered a blow to the head. Confused, and unable to remember who or where he is, he must try and find himself before it's too late. T for swears and violence.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Humor/Angst - Chapters: 51 - Words: 44,085 - Reviews: 71 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 7/18/2011 - Published: 6/27/2011 - Ezio A. - Complete
Gatto reviews
It's a bit after Cesare's downfall, and now it seems that all is not as easy as it should be with the General in prisoned. T for swears and slight violence. R&R I really don't mind the comments.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 27 - Words: 33,377 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 6/28/2011 - Published: 5/19/2011 - Ezio A., Leonardo da Vinci - Complete
Perché proprio a me? reviews
While studing the Apple Leonardo is sent to the year 2012. Now Desmond and the others have to find a way to get him back to his own time. T for swears
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Humor/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 8 - Words: 9,060 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 6/16/2011 - Published: 5/23/2011 - Leonardo da Vinci, Desmond M.
A New Revelation reviews
Yup, I basically wrote the commercial plus a few little details that aren't in the original as a short fanfic. Why? Cause I can. T for the fighting and the swears.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Suspense - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,770 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Published: 6/11/2011 - Ezio A. - Complete
Tale of the Brotherhood reviews
What happens when you get Ezio to see a play about himself with Leonardo and all his other friends and allies? T for swears.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,464 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 6/7/2011 - Published: 5/30/2011 - Ezio A.
Trigger itch reviews
What happens when you've got Desmond's ancestors, their best friends, and Shaun playing their own game? T for strong language.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 720 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/23/2011 - Altaïr, Ezio A. - Complete
Ghost's suckish day reviews
Got the idea because my day was similiar. T for swearing.
Call of Duty - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 641 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/21/2011 - Ghost - Complete
Song Parodies COD STYLE reviews
SO I was thinking about Call of Duty when I wrote this first one. More will be on the way, probably.
Call of Duty - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,152 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 2/19/2011 - Published: 2/13/2011
What happened last night? reviews
After one hell of a night, it leaves Soap, Price, Ghost, ROach, and Meat wondering what had truely happened.
Call of Duty - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,083 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 4 - Published: 1/23/2011 - MacTavish/Soap, Cpt. John Price - Complete
Slim Jims reviews
When Royce is sent a box of Slim Jims what will happen?
Call of Duty - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 769 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Published: 1/23/2011
Plan B reviews
Warning, there is some bad lanuage like the f*ck. So if you don't want to read swears then don't bother. But we see what would happen with call of duty, when there are a few other chapters involved.
Call of Duty - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 6,110 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/21/2011 - MacTavish/Soap