Likes eating:Wounded little animals that I come across.
Likes:Anime, Cartoons, Video-games, and a bunch of other stuff.
Hates: Really stupid fics, when people with good stories don't update, and when people write fics with really bad spelling and grammer and don't fix it.
Things not to say to certain people.
Cops:Aren't you that guy who got his ass kicked on "Cops" last night?
Lay off the doghnuts.
Hobos:Can I borrow some money?
President:So how about them weapons of mass destruction?
Random sayings of me and other people. Feel free to copy ;)
Everybody wants to be remembered for something...the other day I was walking down the street, I saw a young boy eating an icecream cone. I ran up-I SMASHED it in his face! I said, "YOU'LL REMEMBER ME FOREVER!" and I ran into the woods.
... he was hit by a Dodge ... which I found funny and ironic ...
And the lord said "A chicken in every pot, and a cap in every ass!"
If aliens invaded the world...they would take one look at Micheal Jackson and say,"Fuck! You got here first! Captain we're late."
Sticks and stones may break your bones, but a fifty foot fall will kill ya'll!
13 supposed to be an unlucky number? Well then so should the letter B cuz it looks like a squished 13. What's your name? "Bob." Get the hell away from me!"
Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, than weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile!
If you think that T.V. Channels should stop trying to shove live action shows down our throats and go back to showing animated shows like Danny Phantom, Invader Zim, etc. Copy and paste this to your profile.
Confucious say:What you do not wish done to yourself, do not do to others. I say:If the ass hole is screwin' with ya it takes 44 muscles to frown BUT it only takes 4 muscles to lift you arm and Bitch slap the Mother Fucker upside the head!If you feel the way I do then copy this to your profile and add your name to the list.RoxasRoxOutloud,
My dad always tells me that when I get older"DON'T DRINK AND DRIVE!You might hit a bump and spill your drink".
Get me the holy hand grenade!
I discard your reality and substitute my own!
Why wont you die?!
Yippie Kei Yay mother fuckers!
If you do something right, people wont be sure you've done anything at all.
Beatings aren't funny, stabbings aren't funny, clowns aren't funny, yet beating and stabbing a clown is hilarious!
You lie, YOU LIE!
But I need tacos, I need them or I will explode.
Huh, what is this? Who are you? Who are you?! WHO ARE YOU?!
I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.
When I die, I wanna be buried face down. So anyone who doesn't like me can kiss my ass!
If stupidity = money, most of us would be rich. If money = stupidity, most of us would be geniuses.
It's you and me against the world...we attack at dawn!
When the apocolypse comes there will be great chaos and destruction everywhere...I can't wait.
(Thoughts of a teacher)Hmm its dank, there's no hope...I should teach down here!
Chaos, destruction, sadness, anger, hatred, looks like my job here is done!
When I'm angry at someone I take a step back and count to ten, so they can get a ten second head start.
If you highjack a car and get sent to jail a friend would bail you out. But a TRUE friend would be standing right next to you in that cell saying "That was awesome!".
Its only funny until someone gets hurt. Then its freaking hilarious!
Silence is golden, but ducktape is silver!
I killed Christopher Robin! Me, I tell you! ME!
Giant flying monkeys will enslave the earth and I shall enslave the giant flying monkeys. Therefore I shall enslave the earth!
If I killed you right now, would anyone care?
I'm gonna sing the Doom song now! Doom doom doom doomy doom doomy doomy doom doom-
Well, you've seen me. Now I must kill you.
Jokes from people I know and from other places.
Two muffins are burning in an oven, one muffin says "AGH! Were burning!" The other says "OMG, a talking muffin O_o".
REASONS TO JOIN THE DARK SIDE (If you wish to join add this list to your profile):
1. We have cookies (last I checked there was hot chocolate too)
2. Meet the recruitment bunny!
3. You get a cool dark cape that covers your whole body!
4. You get a really cool crazy laugh! Practice with me people: MWAHAHAHAHA cough cough!
5. You get to walk out of shadows mysteriously and freak out the good guy!
6. One word: UNDERLINGS! Someone to get things for you when you're too lazy to do them yourself... Now that's the life
7. Money Money Money : Ever notice that we are usually much richer than the good guys?
1.) You accidentaly enter your password on a microwave.
2.) You haven't played solitare with real cards for years.
3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they dont have a screenname or my space.
4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the TV.
6.) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job.
7.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling.
8.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.
9.) And you were too busy to notice number 5.
10.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5.
11.) Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly.
12.) Put this in your profile if you fell for that, and you know you did.
Now for some questions that no one knows the answer to!
Why is it considered necessary to naildown the lid of a coffin?
Why don't we ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why dosen't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Why do doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is the man that invests all your money called a broker?
Why can't they make the plane out of the same substance that indestructable little black box is?
Can fat people go skinny-dipping?
If a person with multiple personalities theatens suicide, is that consisdered a hostage situation?
If a cow laughed would milk come out of her nose?
So what's the speed of dark?
How come abbreviated is such a long word?
Since light travels faster than sound, isn't that why people appear bright until you hear them speak?
Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag?
Should women put pictures of missing husbands on beer cans?
How much deeper would oceans be if sponges didn't live there?
Why does the word Filipino start with letter "F"?
EMO= extravegentley made origami
If the sky is the limit then what is space, over the limit?
Why do our noses run and our feet smell?
If you have sex with a prostitute against her will, is it considered rape or shoplifting?
Can you cry under water?
How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
Why do you have to 'put your two cents in'... but it's only a 'penny for your thoughts'? Where's that extra penny going to?
Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
What disease did cured ham actually have?
How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
Why is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when babies wake up like every two hours?
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.
Why is 'bra' singular and 'panties' plural?
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ?
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune? Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
Do stairs go up or down?
Do coffins have lifetime guarantees?
When French people swear do they say “Pardon my English?”
Why does the last piece of ice always stick to the bottom of the cup?
Why do they put Braille on the drive through bank machines?
If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?
16 THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART
1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.
2. Set all the alarm clocks in Electronics to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, " 'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.
5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
9. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.
11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.
13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream.. "NO! NO! It's those voices again!"
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!
16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "pikachu, I choose you!"
Repost this if you laughed...
If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.
If you are addicted to werewolves and would like to become one, post this onto your profile.
If you don't have a problem with homosexuals, copy this to your profile
If you don't care that watching cartoons is considered immature, copy & paste this into your profile
If your fashion sense is "is it comfortable?", copy this to your profile.
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