Author has written 4 stories for Powerpuff Girls, and Xiaolin Showdown.
Name: Briar (I prefer being called Briar)
Colors:Emerald, Jade, Light Blue, Blue, Red, Pink, Black, White
Food:..ummm...is that a trick question?
Movies: The Lost Boys, Zombieland,Io non ho paura, Dr. Horrible's sing along blog, The Tourist, Conair, Alice in Wonderland, The Illiousnist, Robin Hood: Men in tights, Steam boy, Orlando
Books: The Chaos Walking series, The saga of Daren Shan!!!!!!! Malcolm X, Inkheart series, Series of unfortunate events, May Bird series and countless other things that I cant remember.
Graphic novels: Scott Pilgrim series.
Anime: Ramna 1/2, Black Cat, DN Angle, Girls Bravo, He is my master, Dragon Ball Z Kai, Peach Girl, Death Note, Dammisheita! Powerpuff Girlz Z
Manga: Love me like a comic, Ranma 1/2, Black Bird, Junjuo Romantica,Imadoki no Shishunki, Jail bird, Glamorous Lip, Secret, Aishichattano, Boku no Ano Ko, I want to be naughty, Otana Keikenchi, ANO HI NO KIMI WO DAKISHIMETA NARA, ROYAL FIANCE, Perfect XXX, Darling, SAA KOI NI OCHITAMAE, Denkou Sekka Boys & THUNDERBOLT BOYS: EXCITE, Koori No Mamono No Monogatari: The Tyrant who falls in love, Hoshi no Yakata
Bands/Artists: All American Rejects, Bass Hunter, Aqua, Vocaloid, Cascada, DJ SATOMI, Crazy Frog, Daft Punk, Foo Fighters, Fall Out Boy, Bowling for soup, Three Days Grace, Lady Gaga, Linkin Park, t.A.T.u., Owlcity, Disturbed, Maroon 5, 3Oh!3
Likes: Food,TV, reading, tacos, Powerpuff girls, Villans more than heros, Chocolate (even though I'm allergic) writing (even though i'm lousy) chicken
Dislikes: Spelling (and the fact that when I read storys written by someone from another contry that can spell English better than me), Grammer, Stupid people, hate, tofu, sushi(but I love it when myfriends draw them), and alot of other stuff that Im to lazy to type
Cartoons:Powerpuff girls,Johny Test,Johny Bravo, Knd, Genarator Rex, Ben 10 (from when they were little and Ben was a little less of a jerk), Invader Zim, The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy, Kick Buttowski, The Batman, Spectular Spiderman, Adventure Time, Xhoulin Showdown, Teen Titans, Secret Saturdays, SpongeBob, Fairly Odd parents, My Life As A Teenage Robot, Atomic Betty, Batman Beyond, Sym Bionic Titan
Gender: Hmmm lets see what could it be... what a mystery! I Mean my names only Ms Briar!
Age: It ain't polite ta ask a lady her age
Location: One of the states that no one likes even if they live there.
Heres some extra stuff about me. I am lazy to a fault so dont expect any quick updates...ever.
I check my email like daily, its sort of sad but It also means that is ya wanna tell me something go a head and I will answer back so fast it'll make your head spin!
Grammer and spelling are not my things so Im sorry if I screw up.
I love cursing (who dosent...fuck! damn! shit! bastard!!!! :D) but if for some reason you cant stand people who curse I'll try not to do it around you.
When I cough or blow my noes for too long my right fore arm does this weird twitchy spazy thing that I hate.
I am a strong supporter of equal rights regardless of race, spiruality, and sexuality. so the things I write or fave will express those things. If you cant take it, sit down and shut up because no ones forcing you to care. That also means respect people. I hear enough gay bashing at school and at home and I simply dont need any more. I'm bisexual and have a lot of friends that are gay or bi I love very much. Hearing them be degraded and disrespected makes me hurt as much as they do. Not to mention thking shit from other people about my own sexuality. Show respect people.
My heros have always been the villans. Serously. Billy the Kid. Napoleon. Jessie and Frank James( but mostly Jessie of cource.) The Joker. (Batman) Iunike (Batman Beyond) Chase young and Jack Spicer(xhoulin showdown) The Roudyruff boys (Powerpuff girls), The Roudyruff boyz Z(Dammisheita! Powerpuff Girlz Z), Bell and Gir (Powerpuff Girls D) Anubis, Lokie, Set, Aries, Hades, Pluto, Thanatos (I shame myself with all this evil. I cant even rember a time when I looked up and was like golly gee I sure do wish i was more like (insert good guy here)! Im always rooting for the bad guy.) ((Shame on me TTwTT))
Also since my faves list is getting kinda long(161?! 161 friggen storys! I spend way too much time here! Those arent all my favorites just storys I really really like) I'll put up my top favorites with a breif discription soon so if your look ing for a good read you got one ; ) (Although you could always read my story Living which i promis I havent given up on, Im just lazy)
Allies and Rivals » by Tonifranz This is part one in a simply awsmazing trilogy. This is a Rowdyruff boy rebirth and turn to good. While there isn't really romance, since there kids, theres a lot of action. A clear plot. They all stay in character and this was mindblowingly awesome! Have you ever gotten bored in a fight scene? You wont in this story. The battles are firce, When its funny its gut butsting. There are no words to describe the awzmaisingness of it all.
Allies and Rivals II : Commander and the Leader » by Tonifranz This is part two. Brick and Blossom fight for control of the now merged teams. Things get ugly and mud will be slung. The wounds of the past are healing but with all of there fighting how long can that last. Add on the new and dangerous enmies coming up in Townsville things are bound to get worse. Can these two find a solution before its too late.
Allies and Rivals III : MIND GAMES » by Tonifranz The girls are in trouble and the boys are confused. Who can tell whats right from whats wrong with all the mind games going on. Who can you trust when your friends turn on you and when the ones you love are all in a dream. And would Townsville really be Townsville without evil rising up out of the shadows to mess them up.
Hell Tempted Me by FuckMePumps Temptation is a very strong thing. Every Samson has his Delilah, even Brick. Can you avoid her or you doomed to want your own distruction. Brick takes his Delilah on the battle feild.
One Hundred Shards of Glass » by Quillified This is a colection of one shots to help Quilly get a feel for writing Powerpuff stuff. This means he/she can write about whatever he/she damn well pleases. With this info in mind dont be a dick and whine when its not a classic paring.
Ghost Story» by Red Lioness For the love of God dont read this in the dark like I did. I nearly pissed myself out of fear. Jack Spicer was never a threat in life so he wouldnt be in death either...would he? Our Jackie is dead and he's going for blood! This is the Revenge of Jack Spicer
The Author favs are pretty acurate though.
"Its okay to love someone who doesnt love you back as long as they deserve it." People who face unrequited love with a brave face and a smile detirmned to do only what makes their love happy are the heros of any one who is going through unrequited or unacnolaged love.
Sory for all copy'n' paste repeats I realy dont rember what I put on this thing
This is all i will say about Zutara
you all anger me.
HE HAS BEEN TRYING TO KILL THEM 4 4EVEA WHY WOULD THEY FALL IN LOVE?????
that's all i have to say.
Even when you can’t see him GOD is there! If you believe in GOD put this in your profile
COME TO MY PARTY!
THE TIGHTEST PARTY IN THE WORLD!
I'm throwing a party, there will be a DJ... everyone is invited!
So everyone come, but first read the rest of this bulletin.
Come Kick it at The Biggest Party Ever!
Special Guests: Jesus Christ, God The Father,
When: When you enter the Gates of Heaven
Where: Kingdom of Heaven
How: Just Ask
Why: Because God Loves You!
...Come As You Are! Bring Nothing but Your Heart and Soul.
98% of Teens Won't Stand Up For GOD...
Repost this if you're one of the 2 who will...
Jesus said, "If you deny me in front of your friends, I will deny
Props for Justen Beiber(did i spell that right?) for loving Jesus all the way (I still don't like his music XD)
Repost as Come to My Party!
Copy this into your profile if you love Teen Titans!
For people that hate stereotypes: If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile. (BOLD the ones you are.)
I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz.
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash. (I hope people realize that there are A LOT of black people down south.)
I TAKE ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage. (Can someone please tell me what the hell a savage even is??)
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore...
I'm a DANCER, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a Goth or Emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals.
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST is looking for attention.
I’m INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST is a homosexual.
I’m a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST is a crazy political activist
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST is fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST is a player.
I’m COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I’m RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and that’s how Russians roll.
I’m GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so I must be GAY Too
I’m BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG Butt.
I’m PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited.
I’m SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13.
I'm POLISH so I MUST be greedy.
I’m HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy.
I’m PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas.
I’m a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction.
I’m a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude.
I’m STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I’m a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly. or crazy.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff.
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks. (My last boyfriend was the biggest and self proclaimed hipster in the fucking world.)
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7.
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA. (The man was from the middle east. He was bum bum BUM Middle eastern!)
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect.
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black.
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil.
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self-control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be Emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE… So I MUST be a whore myself.
I’m a GOTH, so I MUST be a Satanist.
I’m a CROSS DRESSER, so I must be homosexual.
I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak.
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak.
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep.
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be Emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent, and love hockey and beavers.
I’m QUIET if I don’t know you so I MUST be Emo or anti-social.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth. (I love guys and ALL they got going, I just like equality too)
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE.
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser.
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy.
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT, I MUST be having cyber sex.
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion.
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast.
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish.
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroos.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I am friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.
I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp.
I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist.
I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, then burst into tears at one mistake.
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I CURSE A LOT so I MUST be a bad kid and have problems.
I DON'T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE
Puck:If we shadows have offended, think but this; and all is mended that you have but slumbered here while these visions did appear and this weak and idle theme no more yielding but a dream. Gentles--do not reprehend if you pardon, we will mend. And, as I am an honest Puck if we have unearned luck. Now to scape the serpents tongue. We will make amends ere long else the Puck a liar call. So--goodnight unto you all. Give me your hands if we be friends. And Robin shall restore amends.
Sigh no more, ladies, sigh nor more;
Sing no more ditties, sing no mo,
A manager at Wal-Mart had the task of hiring someone to fill a job opening. After sorting through a stack of resumes he found four people who were equally qualified. He decided to call the four in and ask them only one question. Their answer would determine which of them would get the job.
The day came and as the four sat around the conference room table, the interviewer asked, 'What is the fastest thing you know of?'
The first man replied, 'A THOUGHT.' It just pops into your head. There's no warning.
'That's very good!' replied the interviewer. 'And, now you sir?', he asked the second man.
'Hmmm...let me see 'A blink! It comes and goes and you don't know that it ever happened. A BLINK is the fastest thing I know of.'
'Excellent!' said the interviewer. 'The blink of an eye, that's a very popular cliché for speed.' He then turned to the third man, who was contemplating his reply.
'Well, out at my dad's ranch, you step out of the house and on the wall there's a light switch. When you flip that switch, way out across the pasture the light on the barn comes on in less than an instant. 'Yep, TURNING ON A LIGHT is the fastest thing I can think of'.
The interviewer was very impressed with the third answer and thought he had found his man. 'It's hard to beat the speed of light,' he said.
Turning to BUBBA, the fourth and final man, the interviewer posed the same question.
Old Bubba replied, 'After hearing the previous three answers, it's obvious to me that the fastest thing known is DIARRHEA.'
'WHAT!?' said the interviewer, stunned by the response.
'Oh sure', said BUBBA. 'You see, the other day I wasn't feeling so good, and I ran for the bathroom, but before I could THINK, BLINK, or TURN ON THE LIGHT, I had already s*t my pants.'
BUBBA is now the new greeter at a Wal-Mart near you!
An old prospector……
An old prospector shuffled into town leading an old tired mule. The old man headed straight for the only saloon in town to clear his parched throat. He walked up to the saloon and tied his old mule to the hitch rail.
As he stood there brushing some of the dust from his face and clothes, a young gunslinger stepped out of the saloon with a gun in one hand and a bottle of whiskey in the other. The young gunslinger looked at the old man and laughed, saying, 'Hey old man, have you ever danced?'
The old man looked up at the gunslinger and said, 'No, I never did dance, -- and just never wanted to.' A crowd had gathered quickly and the gunslinger grinned and said, 'Well, you old fool, you're gonna' dance now,' and started shooting at the old man's feet.
The old prospector in order to not get a toe blown off or his boots perforated was soon hopping around like a flea on a hot skillet and everybody was laughing fit to be tied. When the last bullet had been fired the young gunslinger, still laughing, holstered his gun and turned around to go back into the saloon. The old man turned to his pack mule, pulled out a double barreled shotgun, and cocked both hammers back. The loud, audible double clicks carried clearly through the desert air.
The crowd stopped laughing immediately. The young gunslinger heard the sounds, too, and he turned around very slowly. The quiet was almost deafening.
The crowd watched as the young gunman stared at the old timer and the large gaping holes of those twin barrels. He found it hard to swallow.. The barrels of the shotgun never wavered in the old man's hands.
The old man said, 'Son, did you ever kiss a mule's ass?'
The boy bully swallowed hard and said, 'No. But I've always wanted to.'
There are two lessons for us all here: 1. Don't waste ammunition. 2. Don't mess with old people
"Alright, I've been thinking. When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. (Yeah) Make life take the lemons back! (Yeah!) Get mad! (Yeah!) I don't want your damn lemons, what am I supposed to do with these? (Yeah! Take the lemons) Demand to see life's manager! (Yeah!) Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! (Oh, I like this guy.) I'm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down! (Burn his house down!) *cough* (Burning people, he says what we're all thinking.)" - Cave Johnson (GLaDOS)
Slay his flower picking rump!" Dragon from jane and the Dragon
"Oh! Look! Death!" Deamondology 101
Hunk Williams, Jr.-I think Lenny put it best in the Simpsons episode “Last Exit to Springfield” when he said:You can’t treat the working man this way. One day, we’ll form a union and get the fair and equitable treatment we deserve! Then we’ll go too far, and get corrupt and shiftless, and the Japanese will eat us alive!
Everything here is eatable. I'm eatable, but that my children is called cannibalism and is frowned upon in most societies.- Willy Wanka
Put this on you profile...
If you sit in your car waiting for the song you love to be over, then leave.
If someone tells you "don't look now", but you do anyway
If you love waking up in the middle of the night, and realizing you have more time to sleep
If you hate waking up from a good dream and it won't come back.
If your headphones are ALWAYS tangled.
If slow computers drive you CRAZY.
If you love laughing until it hurts and you can't breathe.
If you used to blow into video games and it actually made them work.
If you use your cell phone to see in the dark.
If you can't help but find everything hilarious at 4 AM.
If you think those 5 extra minutes of sleep really make a difference.
If your fridge has NOTHING in it to eat, no matter how full it is.
If all those years you watched Blues Clues, you never realized Blue was a GIRL.
If you can't stand to hear your own voice in videos or recordings.
If you pull out your phone and pretend to text in awkward situations.
If you check behind the shower curtain for murderers before getting in.
If you love people who text back instantly.
If you stand in the shower for ages because the hot water feels soooo good.
If you really wish you could record your dreams and watch them later.
If you wish music played during epic moments in your life, like in movies.
If you hate getting out of the shower and it's FREEZING.
If you walk a little faster when you see a creepy van.
If you hate how the best part of your dream is always right about to happen when you wake up.
If you haven't lost it... you just... haven't found it yet.
If you and your best friend can say one word and almost die from laughing hysterically.
If you have to try SO hard not to laugh when you're getting scolded.
If you and your best friend could sit down next to each other, not say a single word, and walk away feeling as if it was the greatest conversation ever.
If you stop the microwave before it hits 0:00 to avoid hearing the loud BEEPs.
If you know because everyone's house has a different smell that yours must have one. But you still can't smell it!
If you have to say the entire alphabet out loud because you can't remember what letter comes next.
If you get paranoid because the spider you saw five seconds ago isn't there anymore.
If you hate it when you think of a really good comeback after the argument.
If you love it when teachers get off track and tell you stories about their life.
If your favorite song always seems to come on right as you pull into your driveway.
If you want to STRANGLE that kid who reminds the teacher about homework and quizzes.
If you were first in Mario Kart, you fell off a cliff, and then you were... last.
If whenever someone says 'I like your shirt', you look down to see what you're wearing.
If you look down at your cell phone when you're walking past someone you want to avoid.
If you hate when teachers say "From all the talking, I assume everyone is done."
If you have dropped your phone on your face while laying down texting.
If once you turn off all the lights in the basement you run the heck out of there.
If you feel like a ninja whenever you drop something and catch it.
I used to be normal, until I met the freaks that I call my friends.
Best friends are the people that know all about and still put up with you!
I dream of a better tomorrow--when chickens can cross the road and not have their motives questioned.
You laugh now because you're older than me by mere months, but when you're 30 and I'm still 29, who will be laughing then?
I dont have a short attention span, i just...oh look, a kitty!
I live in my own little world, but it's ok, everyone knows me here :)
I live in a world full of bunnies and unicorns...but the bunnies are cutting themselves and the unicorns are acting all emo again.
I run with scissors, it makes me feel dangerous.
I ran with scissors, and lived
In Honor of Stupid People:
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed to stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:
On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping.
On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
On a bar of Dial soap -- "Directions: Use like regular soap,"
On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- "Do not turn upside down."
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding -- "Product will be hot after heating."
On packaging for a Rowena iron -- "Do not iron clothes on body."
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine -- "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."
On Nytol Sleep Aid -- "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
On most brands of Christmas lights -- "For indoor or outdoor use only."
On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the other use."
On Sainsbury's peanuts -- "Warning: contains nuts."
On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
On a child's Superman costume -- "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
On a package of pasta after the cooking instructions:
On a Swedish chainsaw:
On a child's Superman costume:
On a Korean kitchen knife:
On some brand of bacon bits -- "fake artificial bacon bits"
Spread the Stupidity
Only in America do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
COCA COLA WENT TO TOWN
PEPSI COLA KNOCKED HIM DOWN
DR PEPPER PICKED HIM UP
NOW WE'RE DRINKING 7 UP.
7 UP CAUGHT THE FLU
AND NOW WE'RE DRINKING MOUNTAIN DEW
MOUNTAIN DEW FELL OFF THE MOUNTAIN
NOW WE'RE DRINKING WATER FOUNTAIN
WATER FOUNTAIN BROKE
AND NOW WE'RE DRINKING COKE!
REASONS I OWE MY MOTHER
1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
3 . My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
7. My mother taught me IRONY.
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION .
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
Friends Verses Best Friends
Friend: Never asks for anything to eat or drink
Friend: Calls your parents Mr. and Mrs. and your grandpa, Grandpa
Friend: Would bail you out of jail
Friend: Would bail you out again because you're "a good person"
Friend: Have never seen you cry
Friend: Asks you to write down your number
Friend: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back
Friend: Only knows a few things about you
FRIENDS: Tell you that you look nice.
FRIENDS: Say "good luck" when you go get your ears pierced.
FRIENDS: Roll their eyes when you start rambling yet again about your boyfriend (the fourth time that night).
FRIENDS: Smile when you get obsessed with something.
FRIENDS: Say "sees you later!"
FRIENDS: Ask you to write down your number
FRIENDS: Forgives you.
FRIENDS: Tell jokes with you.
FRIENDS: Tell you that you're the most annoying thing on earth.
FRIENDS: Will help you move
FRIENDS: Meet your boyfriend and say nice to meet you
FRIENDS: Annoy you.
FRIENDS: comfort you when you fight with your boyfriend
FRIENDS: tell you to forget it when you say you want to vandalize a guy's house
FRIENDS: Think you’re insane for jumping off a roof onto a trampoline
FRIENDS: come over every couple of months for a sleepover
FRIENDS: are offended when you make fun of them
FRIENDS: are shy around your boyfriend
FRIENDS: don't see you if you're sick
FRIENDS: call you retarded for running through bleachers yelling "IT'S PICKLE TIME!"
Friend: Will leave you behind if that's what the crowd is doing
Friend: Would knock on your front door
Friend: You have to tell them not to tell anyone
Friend: Are only with you through high school/college (lunch buddies)
Friend: Will comfort when a guy rejects you
Friend: Helps you find your prince
Friend: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying
Friend: Offers you soda
Friend: Will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month
Friend: Gives you their umbrella in the rain
Friend: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough
Friend: Will help you move
Friend: Helps you up when you fall
Friends: Will call the ambulance if you fall off a bridge
Friends: Ask you what's wrong
Friend: Tell you that you're too good for him when you get dumped
Friend: Asks you why you're crying
Friend: Hides you from the cops
Friend: Will help you find your way when you're lost
Friend: Will help you learn how to drive
Friend: Would ignore this letter
1. You punch or whack people when they act stupid.
2. You love fights and laugh when people get hurt, but you're not sadistic. A lot.
3. You're tough!
4. You always point out people's flaws or mistakes.
5. You have a crush on a guy who doesn't know you like him, but you hide it by making fun of him.
6. You are NOT a girly-girl!
7. You like to walk barefoot. You HATE wearing shoes.
8. You're sarcastic a lot.
9. You pick your nose, pick your toes, burp, and spit.
10. You hate flying. Especially on ten-ton flying bisons.
Meaning of Each Letter in Your Name
You know you watch too much Ranma 1/2 if you think that when you grow old, you'll shrink down to half the size you were before.
You know you watch too much Ranma 1/2 when everything you do is classified as a martial art.
You know you watch to much Ranma 1/2 when you won't go to a hot bath for fear of perverts.
You know you watch too much Ranma 1/2 when you bring 2 pairs of panties to school, so if one gets stolen, you won't have to worry about it.
You know you watch too much Ranma 1/2 when you kick boys into the air and across the sky daily.
You know you watch too much Ranma 1/2 when you're now afraid to death of water.
You know you watch too much Ranma 1/2 when you take a trip to China to try to find Jusenkyo
If any of these symptoms apply to you, paste this on your profile
I'm not clumsy the floor wanted to say hi to my face.
Every one can catch a ball it takes skill to catch it with your face.
92 percent of American teenagers would die if Ambercrombie and Fitch/American Eagle told them it was uncool to breathe. If you are one of the 8 percent who would stand there and laugh their ass off, copy this into your profile.
If you haven't died yet copy and paste this to your profile.
If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.
If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile. (Hell yeah!)
If you are obsessed with Alvin and the Chipmunks, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you ever wonder who started these copy and paste quotes CAPTIYP
Even if you can't see him GOD is there! If you believe in GOD CAPTIYP
If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile. (?? LOL)
If you've read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile
If you have your own little world CAPTIYP (ishnishish!)
If your to lazy to type the words "copy and paste this on to your profile" CAPTIYP
Man: Where have you been all my life?
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Man: Is this seat empty?
Man: Your place or mine?
Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Man: Your body is like a temple.
Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together.
Man: Your eyes they're amazing.
Man:Aren't you tired baby? You've been running in my mind all day.
Woman:Yeah, I know. I've been trying to find a way out
There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile.( only sometimes. SHUT UP!)
For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you just what you find so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour long sob-fest, then start singing and dancing when your favorite song plays. Crazy is when you do or say a totally random thing, like "do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or start having a thumbwar with yourself (i find that i am a very tough opponent). So if you're crazy, copy this onto your profile.
If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile.
If you ever pushed on a door that said "Pull" copy this into your profile.
If you ever tripped over your own feet, copy this into your profile
If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.
If you believe that the government should make levees, not war, copy this into your profile.
92 percent American teens would die if Abecrombie and Fitch told them it's uncool to breathe. Copy this into your profile if you would be in the 8 percent laughing their asses off at the others.
If you are scared that clowns will eat you in your sleep. copy and paste this to your profile.
STOP DRUNK DRIVING!!
I went to a birthday party,
And remembered what you said.
You told me not to drink at all,
So I had a Sprite instead.
I felt proud of myself,
The way you said I would,
That I didn't choose to drink and drive,
Though some friends said I should.
I knew I made a healthy choice and,
Your advice to me was right,
As the party finally ended,
And the kids drove out of sight.
I got into my own car,
Sure to get home in one piece,
Never knowing what was coming,
Something I expected least.
Now I'm lying on the pavement,
And I hear the policeman say,
"The kid that caused this wreck was drunk."
His voice seems far away.
My own blood is all around me,
As I try hard not to cry.
I can hear the paramedic say,
"This girl is going to die."
I'm sure the guy had no idea,
While he was flying high,
Because he chose to drink and drive,
That I would have to die.
So why do people do it,
Knowing that it ruins lives?
But now the pain is cutting me,
Like a hundred stabbing knives
Tell sister not to be afraid, Mom
Tell daddy to be brave,
And when I go to heaven,
Put "Daddy's Girl" on my grave.
Someone should have taught him,
That it's wrong to drink and drive.
Maybe if his mom and dad had,
I'd still be alive.
My breath is getting shorter,
I'm getting really scared.
These are my final moments,
And I'm so unprepared.
I wish that you could hold me Mom,
As I lie here and die.
I wish that I could say,
I love you and good-bye.
Add this you know you should
Recent studies show that 92 percent of teenagers have moved on to rap. If you're part of the 8 percent that stayed with rock, put this in your profile.
If you have ever yelled at an inanimate object copy and paste this into your profile (If its in my room i've screamed at it atleast once...this week)
If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.
Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile.
I don't obsess! I think intensely.
You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder
I'm the kind of girl who will burst our laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.
I hear voices, and they don't like you.
My imaginary friend thinks you have serious problems.
If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile
"Everything here is eatable. I'm eatable, but that my children is called cannibalism and is frowned upon in most societies." Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, right?
Why are the Force and duck tape the same?-Both have a light and dark side and hold the universe together.
When life gives you lemons, alter their DNA and make SUPER LEMONS!
I was gifted, but the psychiatrist took away my powers.
If you have ever started to read a chapter, forgot to finish it and then find out the author posted up another chapter, reading that chapter and not understanding it, copy and paste this into your profile.
Copy and paste this into your profile if when you were young... There were only 150 Pokemon. Digimon was popular.Yugi-Oh actually had Yugi in it. You didn’t get weird looks when you went Trick-or-Treating. Nobody cared what you looked like. Hamtaro ROCKED. Catching a pidgeon was cool. Pirates before Pirates of the Carribean. Nobody knew how to spell 'Volcano'. Pinky and the brain were cartoon characters, not body parts. Saying 'moron' was a swear word.(Well it was but that didnt stop me) Fire was considered dangerous. The only thing you had to worry about were cooties. Cursive writing was just a bunch of swirly lines. Multiplication was scary. Dora the Explorer and that goddamned monkey who follows her EVERYWHERE didn't exist.The first Harry Potter was the coolest thing since sliced bread. If you were, copy and paste then write your name. Catemonster, Angel Dumott Schunard Collins,Dumott Schunard, sundrynotes, Hoiki, Puppy Death Glare, Kit-Kat Punk-lover,BeyondBirthday187,Samantha James13303,Mz. Briar
Whoever said "Nothing's impossible" never tried slamming a revolving door." - Boomer
"The light you see at the end of the tunnel is the headlight of a fast approaching train."-Matt
FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.
FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.
FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.
FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.
FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.
FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.
FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.
FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.
FRIENDS: Are only through highschool/college. (aka: drinking buddies)
FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough.
FRIENDS: Would ignore this letter
If you think you have too many of those "copy and paste this to your profile"s, copy and paste this to your profile
IF YOU HAVE SPELLED YOUR NAME WRONG PASTE THIS IN YOUR PROFILE
Even when you can’t see him GOD is there! If you believe in GOD put this in your profile
If all else fails destroy all evidence you tried
When life gives you lemons make grape juice then sit bak and smirk while everyone else whonders how the heck you did it.
Never argue with an idiot they'll just bring you down to their level and beat you with experience.
Whoever said nothing is impossible, never tried slamming a revolving door.
If you can't beat a computer at chess than ,try kickboxing!! ( I know I can't)
There is always a light at the end of the tunnel. Usually it is an oncoming train.
Evening news start with "Good evening." then continue telling you why it isn't.
A consultant is some one who takes a subject you already know and makes it confusing.
Never argue with a fool people might not know the difference.
When you're right no one remebers, when you're wrong no one forgets.
Last night i was looking at the stars abd thought "where the heck is my ceiling!"
Everybody makes mistakes. The trick is to make them when no one else is looking.
He who laughs last thinks the slowest.
Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.
They say hard work won't kill you, but why take the chance.
An idiot is a 44th window washer and steps back to admire his work.
Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.
I like work. It fascintes me. I can stare at look at it for hours.
If you can't see the bright side of life. polish the dull one.
The secret to sucess is serenity. Once you fake that you're good.
Where there's a will...there are five hundred relitives.
It dosen't matter if you win or lose; what matters if I win or lose.
I used to have super powers. My theripist took them away.
Keep smilling it makes people wonder what you're up to.
Love you're enemies it gets them really confused.
I can only please on person per day. Today's not your day. Tommorrow's not looking good either.
Silence is golden but duct tape is silver. (Got this from a t-shirt.)
I'd explain it to you but your head would explode.
Anythig thrown hard enough should hurt.
Flying is simple just throw yourself at the ground and miss.
I couldn't repiar your breaks so I made the horn louder.
I don't get even I get odder.
Chaos, panic, pandomonium my work here is done.
Two wrongs don't make a wright but it makes a good excuse!
Excuse me while I try to find a container for my joy.
You're slower than turtles stampeding through penut butter.
Never meddle thrrought the affairs of dragons. To them you're cruchy and taste good with ketchup.
97% of teens would cry if they saw Robert Pattison (Edward from twilight) standing on top of a skyscraper, If you're one of those 3% who would sit there eating popcorn yelling "Do a Flip You Sparkly Bitch!" Copy and repost this!
The first time i saw twilight was at my bffs b-day party when whats-his-fase started to sparkle i started to laugh I CANT TAKE SPARKLEY MEN SEROUULY!!!!
- Sometimes I wish I were a monkey. Then I could throw poop at people and it would be legal.
- Say no to drugs! Say yes to enchiladas!
- I never finish anyth
Secret admirers are stalkers with stationary.
Did you know Sarcasm is your body’s natural defense against stupidity?
The pen may be mightier than the sword, but my keyboard can crush your crummy pen!
- My friends are 90 of why I get up each morning, the other 10 is because I have to pee.
- I was going to take over the world but I got distracted by something sparkly
- It's all fun and games until someone gets hurt. Then It's hilarious...
- You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted then used against you.
Pick your birth month
Remeber Back in the Day..
When your close friends became strangers?
Lollipops turned into cigarettes?
The innocent ones turned into sluts?
Homework goes in the trash?
Soda became vodka?
When getting high meant swinging on the playground?
When protection meant wearing a helmet?
When the worst things you could get from boys were cooties?
Dads shoulders were the highest place on earth?
Mom was your hero?
Your worst enemies were your siblings?
Race issues were about who ran the fastest?
The only drug you knew was cough medicine?
Wearing a skirt didn't make you a slut?
The only thing that hurt you was skinned knees?
Goodbyes only meant until tomorrow?
And when we couldn't wait to grow up?
If you still have that little kid inside you, repost this so others can remember back in the day...
You're a 90's kid if:
You can finish this 'ice ice _'
10 Commandments of a Teenager
1) Thou shall not sneak out when parents are sleeping.
When I was 16, I would scream in my dad’s face about the “Working Man” until he’d snap and throw me across the room. As I soared through the air, I’d look down at the Leninist pins on my punk jacket and be proud of myself for standing up for the unions. Then I’d hit the ground somewhere near the front door, open it, yell “FUCK YOU,” and go to my girlfriend’s house to kvetch about how stupid my old man is. Though he worked his ass off his whole life and I had one job at a gas station under my belt, he was a moron who was blind to the oppression around him. Here’s some other impossibly stupid shit I believed when I was like you:
1. BEING INFORMED IS ALL THAT MATTERS
2. MONOGAMY IS A LIE
3. THE WORLD IS TOO OVERPOPULATED TO HAVE KIDS
4. WHO’S CRAZIER, THE MAN ON THE STREET OR THE CEO RIPPING PEOPLE OFF?
5. THE UNION SAVED THE WORKING MAN
6. I’D RATHER HAVE MONEY IN THE GOVERNMENT’S HANDS THAN BIG BUSINESS’ HANDS
7. MARRIAGE IS JUST A PIECE OF PAPER
8. I COULD RETIRE HAPPILY ON $100k
9. A ZOO IS A JAIL FOR ANIMALS
10. VIOLENCE IS NEVER JUSTIFIED
>Attempting to give a damn...
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