meeky311
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Joined 12-22-10, id: 2667015, Profile Updated: 01-25-14
Author has written 2 stories for Twilight.

I'm a thirty something mother of three, a full time student and have a full time job. Fanfiction is my escape from all of the crap life throws at me. I love reading it so much that I sometimes have a hard time updating my own stories...so sorry if I'm slow on the updates.

I spent six years in the navy and I attribute that to my dirty mind and potty mouth, which comes through in my writing. I'm told by all who know me that I lack a verbal filter and typically say whatever goes through my mind at any given moment. I'm also a bit of a perv so if you are easily offended please don't read my writing.

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GYNAZOLE by Mrs.TheKing reviews
Bella has to fill an embarrassing prescription. Mr. Cullen is the pharmacist there to greet her. Rated M for every reason my twisted mind can come up with. ExB God help us if there is a lemon.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 5,442 - Reviews: 10381 - Favs: 2,820 - Follows: 2,380 - Updated: 2/27 - Published: 1/20/2010 - Bella, Edward
Hiding in Plain Sight by limona reviews
Bella is a witness in peril. Emmett Cullen is the deputy assigned to protect her. When the witness protection program isn't safe, Emmett asks Bella to pose as his brother Edward's fiancée until the trial. AU, AH, ExB.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 23 - Words: 141,120 - Reviews: 10579 - Favs: 11,652 - Follows: 12,362 - Updated: 6/14/2012 - Published: 9/14/2008 - Bella, Edward
Breaking News by WriteOnTime reviews
Two network news anchors. One desk. In a race to get the story, love might become the headline - if they don't kill each other first. AH Canon Couples, smart people, particle physics, and tap dancing.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 26 - Words: 182,215 - Reviews: 7128 - Favs: 5,346 - Follows: 4,076 - Updated: 1/3/2012 - Published: 10/5/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Subject: Edward Cullen, aka The Womanizer by ericastwilight reviews
Edward's family hire Bella Swan to break the heartbreaker's heart in hopes to have him see the error of his womanizing ways. But she falls hard, too, at the risk of breaking her own heart when the truth is revealed. EXB-AH-OOC
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 43 - Words: 328,966 - Reviews: 9473 - Favs: 8,295 - Follows: 5,699 - Updated: 9/2/2011 - Published: 10/18/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Agent 00hot by maxandmo reviews
Edward, is a hot F.B.I. Agent who is immediately drawn to Bella, the Parole Officer, who happens to be a magnet for ridiculous situations. Rated M for bad words and lemons. AH/Canon pairings.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 38 - Words: 127,833 - Reviews: 1771 - Favs: 1,498 - Follows: 750 - Updated: 1/25/2011 - Published: 3/14/2010 - Edward, Bella - Complete
The Wedding Party by spanglemaker9 reviews
The perfect person appears at the worst possible moment, and one unforgettable encounter changes everything. AH
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 33 - Words: 192,619 - Reviews: 9332 - Favs: 6,358 - Follows: 3,677 - Updated: 11/3/2010 - Published: 4/1/2010 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Sacrificial Lamb by Nolebucgrl reviews
Redo on the end of Eclipse and replacing BD; when Jacob kisses Bella in the woods after threatening to kill himself. Bella does not have any love for Jacob other than friendship. She embarks on her life with Edward. Canon/AU you decide. Rated M.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 53 - Words: 291,142 - Reviews: 3217 - Favs: 2,037 - Follows: 646 - Updated: 10/9/2010 - Published: 9/20/2009 - Edward, Bella - Complete
I Hate You, Kiss Me by BittenBee reviews
Bella has given up on dating, but she has a one-night stand with a mystery man named Edward. Both are surprised when he gets a job at her law firm! Coworkers Alice and Jasper, best bud Emmett, and sultry boss Rosalie play a role in Bella's love life. Humor, UST. Rated M. Nominated twice for The Lemonade Stand Fic of the Week.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 28 - Words: 198,228 - Reviews: 3039 - Favs: 4,508 - Follows: 2,747 - Updated: 9/9/2010 - Published: 1/19/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Screamers by KiyaRaven reviews
Street kid. Rockstar. Worlds apart and yet so similar. Sometimes fate throws people together for a reason, and sometimes two people that rub each other the wrong way make the best sparks. All Human **WARNING: MOSTLY HUMOR BUT ALSO CONTAINS ANGST & DARK THEMES**
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 39 - Words: 358,773 - Reviews: 12460 - Favs: 7,021 - Follows: 3,443 - Updated: 6/2/2010 - Published: 5/23/2009 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Geek Love by SassenachWench reviews
Humor, romance, healing and rampant geekitude collide in this Edward & Bella love story. "A funny, quirky love story about two computer geeks whose playful friendship turns into something more." Chokin' the Rubber Chicken blog.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 22 - Words: 84,776 - Reviews: 3166 - Favs: 2,749 - Follows: 1,289 - Updated: 1/3/2010 - Published: 8/23/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Faking It by spanglemaker9 reviews
Half of Hollywood's most famous couples are faking it. That's how Bella Swan's publicist convinces her to pretend to date troubled Hollywood bad boy Edward Cullen. And she'll do anything for her band and her music.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 32 - Words: 144,679 - Reviews: 5740 - Favs: 9,370 - Follows: 3,133 - Updated: 10/30/2009 - Published: 6/20/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Bella Swan: Kidnapper by Kambria Rain reviews
Um. Hi. I don’t really know how to say this, but I have your kids with me, and I was thinking maybe you would like them back. So yeah… call me.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 23 - Words: 74,736 - Reviews: 8677 - Favs: 14,058 - Follows: 2,910 - Updated: 6/27/2009 - Published: 5/15/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
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Paladin reviews
A paladin, by definition is any determined advocate or defender of a noble cause. Bella, a coffee barista and Edward, a Seattle detective come together through a common goal, but end up getting a little more than they bargained for. Can they become the fierce defenders they need to be for the most noble cause of all...saving the world? Romance, suspense, humor and all of the above.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 18 - Words: 43,181 - Reviews: 298 - Favs: 153 - Follows: 276 - Updated: 7/30/2014 - Published: 1/20/2014 - Bella, Edward
Supernatural Hunters In Training reviews
Bella is a paranormal investigator. Edward is being seduced by some frisky ghosts. Will Bella be able to help his situation? Or will she just add to the problem by seducing Edward too? This is sort of a crack-fic. Something silly or funny in every chapter. Rated M for naughty language and unique lemony situations.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Supernatural - Chapters: 29 - Words: 72,910 - Reviews: 391 - Favs: 267 - Follows: 234 - Updated: 2/2/2014 - Published: 3/16/2011 - Bella, Edward - Complete