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Joined 12-26-10, id: 2671943, Profile Updated: 05-14-13
Author has written 4 stories for Maximum Ride, Animal Crossing, Heist Society, and Gallagher Girls.

Hiya you guys!

My name is SapphireAster. Obviously, its just a pen name and not the name on my birth certificate. I've written more stories then I can count (most of them are so crappy they don't end up on the site _) and I am a HUGE grammar freak. I'm looking for someone who needs a Beta, so if you need one, review on of my stories or PM me!

Anything else you want to know?

...Look at the craziness below!

P.S... If you read my bio, please say something about flying monkey lizards in a review or PM...

I have a webs so come check it out! Updates on my stories will be posted on it!

My Fav Books/series:

Harry Potter (all books!)

Septimus Heap series

Meg Cabot's fiction

Wee Free Men

39 Clues

Maximum Ride

Gallagher Girls

The Shield, The Sword and The Crown

Agatha Christie's mysteries

...and a LOT more random thingss I find in the library.

Favorite Anime:

Black Butler (Kuroshitsuji)

Fruits Basket

Full Metal Alchemist

Full Metal Panic

Ouran High School Host Club

...mostly slice of life stuff ;)


Boys are like slinkeys, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs.

The only reason people get lost in thought is because it's unfamiliar territory.

"The world has music for those who listen."-William Shakespeare

Always remember that you are unique. Just like everyone else.

If you can't dazzle 'em with brilliance, baffle 'em with bullshit.

"Art is the triumph over chaos"- John Cheever


You love hoodies.
You love jeans.
Dogs are better than cats.
It's hilarious when people get hurt.

You've played with/against boys on a team.
Shopping is torture
Sad movies suck.
You own/ed an X-Box.
Played with Hotwheel cars as a kid.
At some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter.
You own/ed a DS, PS2 or Sega.
You used to be obsessed with Power Rangers.

You watch sports on TV.
Gory movies are cool.
You go to your dad for advice.
You own like a trillion baseball caps.

You like going to high school football games.
You used to/do collect football/baseball cards.
Baggy pants are cool to wear.

Its kinda weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people.
Green, black, red, blue, or silver are one of your favorite colors.

You love to go crazy and not care what people think.
Sports are fun.
Talk with food in your mouth.
Sleep with your socks on at night.

Total: 12


You wear lip gloss.
You love to shop.
You wear eyeliner.
You wear the color pink.
Go to your mom for advice.
You consider cheerleading a sport.
You hate wearing the color black
You like hanging out at the mall.

You like getting manicures and/or pedicures.

You like wearing jewelry.
Skirts are a big part of your wardrobe.
Shopping is one of your favorite hobbies.
You don't like the movie Star Wars.
You were/are in gymnastics/dance.

It takes you around/ more one hour to shower, get dressed, and make-up.

You smile a lot more than you should.
You have more than 10 pairs of shoes.
You care about what you look like.
You like wearing dresses when you can.
You like wearing body spray/perfume/cologne.
You love the movies.
Used to play with dolls as little kid.
Like putting make-up on someone else for the joy/joke of it.
Like being the star of every thing.

Total: 11

Female comebacks
pick up line comebacks

Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.

Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.

Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.

Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.

Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?

Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together
Woman: Really, I'd put f and u together

Man: Your eyes they're amazing.
Woman: Seeing your back would be pretty amazing.

Man: I know how to please a woman.
Woman: Then please leave me alone.

Man: I want to give myself to you.
Woman: Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts.

Man: I'd go through anything for you.
Woman: Good! Let's start with your bank account.

Man: So, wanna go back to my place ?
Woman: Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?

Man: I'd like to call you. What's your number?
Woman: It's in the phone book.

Man: But I don't know your name.
Woman: That's in the phone book too.

Man: Hey, baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not Enter

Man: Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason
Woman: Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!

Man: Haven't we met before?
Woman: Perhaps. I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic.


I am the boy who never finished school because I was called a fag everyday.

I am the girl who got kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I was a lesbian.

I am the prostitute working the streets because no one will hire a transsexual.

I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.

We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.

I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they wouldn't allow my partner of 27 years into the room.

I am the foster child who wakes up to the nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family i have ever had. I wished they could adopt me.

I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before my high school graduation. It was just too much to bear.

We are the couple who had the Realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one bedroom for two men.

I am the one person who does not know which bathroom to use so the management doesn't come for me.

I am the mother who is not even allowed to see the children I bore, nursed and raised.

The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.

I am the father who never hugged my son because I grew up afraid to show affection to males.

I am the Home Ec teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians could teach it.

I am the woman who died when the EMTs stopped treating me as soon as they realized i was transsexual.

I am the man who stopped attending church, not because i don't believe, but because they closed the doors to my kind.

I am the girl ashamed to tell my own friends that I am a lesbian because they make fun of them.

I am the boy tied to a fence, beaten to a bloody pulp and left to die because two straight men said they needed to 'teach me a lesson'.

I am the person who needs to hide what this world needs the most: love.


Ways to Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries with that.

4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It "In."

5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso .

6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write For Smuggling Diamonds"

7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy."

8. Don't use any punctuation

9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.

10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go."

12. Sing Along At The Opera.

13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme?

14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play tropical Sounds All Day.

15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In The Mood.

16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.

17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won!, I Won!"

18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives,They're Loose!!"

19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner."Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."

20. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity...Copy and Paste this into your profile!!


1. Do you think Iggy is hot?


2. Did you cry when Ari died?


3. Do you think Fang is hot?

Naw duh.

4. How do you pronounce Ari's name?

Air-ee or Ar-ee

5. Do you laugh every time you read the name Mr. Chu?


6. -SPOILER ALERT- In MAX, did you laugh hysterically when Total started talking about marriage?

REALLY? Um. no.

7. -SPOILER ALERT- Did you squeal at all the faxness in MAX?

I'm afraid I didn't.

8. Did you angrily throw your book across the room when the flock split up?

No. I was actually in the car so I just made angry noises and got odd looks from my brother.

9. Who is your favorite character?

Max/ Total

10. Do you like Jeb?

I'm rather indifferent

11. -SPOILER ALERT- Were you making a genuine "WTF" face when Max and Fang grew gills?

No, i was thinking: 'how the crap does James Patterson remember all their powers? Does he have a list on his refrigerator?'

12. Did you think MAX was better than TFW?

Yes. TFW was to short

13. -SPOILER ALERT- Did you get slightly fed up with Nudge and Angel's slight attitudes in MAX?

I don’t really remember them having attitudes, so no.

14. Which book is you’re all time favorite?

Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports

15. If the flock had a theme song, what would it be?

Something epic...and by Paramore

16. Have you ever imagined the flock as a band playing whatever song comes up when listening to your iPod?

I can honestly say that has never happened.

17. Who do you think the Voice should be?

Who was the voice?!

18. Do you think one or more members of the flock should learn to play an instrument?

Does it really matter? They're on an island.

19. What bugged you the most about TFW?

the randomness... and how short it was


FAX!!!! ...mylan is horrible and miggy is weird...

Top 75 Most Annoying Things To Do In An Elevator

When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and then pretend it wasn't you.

Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.

Ask if you can push the button for other people, but push the wrong ones.

Call the Psychic Hotline from your cell phone and ask if they know what floor your on.

Hold the doors open and say your waiting for a friend. After a while, let the doors close, and say, "Hi Greg. How's your day been?"

Drop a pen and wait until someone goes to pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!"

Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the elevator.

Move your desk into the elevator and whenever anyone gets on, ask if they have an appointment.

Lay down the twister mat and ask people if they would like to play.

Leave a box in the corner, and when someone gets on, ask them if they can hear ticking.

Pretend you are a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.

Ask, "Did you feel that?"

Stand really close to someone, sniffing them occasionally.

When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay, don't panic, they open again!"

Swat at flies that don't exist.

Tell people that you can see their aura.

Call out, "Group Hug!"and then enforce it.

Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering, "Shut up, all of you, just shut up!"

Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside, ask, "Got enough air in there?"

Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.

Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror, "Your one of THEM!" and back away slowly.

Wear a puppet on your hand and use it to talk to the other passengers.

Listen to the elevator walls with your stethoscope.

Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

Stare, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce, "I have new socks on".

Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers, "This is MY personal space!"

Put police tape in front of the door before entering.

Fart loudly when there are only two of you in the elevator. Argue vehemently that it wasn't you.

Hold an auction.

Do the "potty dance" all the way to the elevator door. Upon arrival, sigh and look greatly relieved.

Ask every passenger coming if you can borrow a tampon. Especially effective if victim is male. Even more effective if you yourself are male.

Throw a rave.

Place potted plants and water fountains at strategic locations in the lift. When people ask what you are doing, tell them you "won't ride an elevator that's not fung shwei."

Greet everyone getting on with a warm handshake and ask them to call you "Admiral".

Hum the first six notes of the "It's a small world" over and over again.

When you brush past someone, whisper "Was it good for you too?"

Lean over to another rider and whisper 'Noogie patrol coming!'"

Have a heated debate with yourself.

Bring a melon onto the elevator. Try to sell it to the other passengers.

Drum on every available surface.

Write a big X on the elevator floor, and hand out "pirate" maps to everyone as they enter.

Give psychotherapy to the other passengers.

Greet everyone coming on as if they were your best friend. Use the same name for all of them.

Say "ring ring," then pull a banana out of your pocket and start talking into it.

Propose to the other passengers.

Challenge people to duels.

Sell girl scout cookies.

Bring a large pile of ice. Build an igloo on the floor.

Come on looking really scared, and say to another passenger..."I'm kinda nervous...this is my first time flying..."

Any time someone enters the doors, recoil in horror.

Stick your tongue out. Act like it's a cigarette, and ask someone for a lighter.

Pitch a tent on the floor, and "camp out" for the weekend.

Play "I've got your nose" with the other passengers.

Shout "Food fight!"

Every time someone else talks, angrily shout: "Some people are trying to sleep here!"

When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to pull the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.

Lick one of the buttons. Tell the other passengers you're sick and tired of people stealing your food the second you turn your back.

Elevators were practically MADE for river dnce!

Bring a snowboard onto the elevator. Put it on. Every time the lift goes up or down, shout "WOO-YEAH! This is what I call sick air!"

Make sushi.

Press your nose against the other passengers, and say "You know, this is what the Eskimos used to do before having sex."


Every time the elevator goes down, loudly scream "OH MY GOD!! We're all gonna die! This is it! This is it! It's over! IT'S OVER!!" Look relieved when it stops

moving. When you begin to drop again, repeat.

Ask the other passengers if they want to see your glass clown collection.

Practice your kung fu.

Make race car noises when people get on and off.

Ask everyone on the elevator: "Are you my mother?"

Fly a model airplane.

Do yoga.

Play the accordion

Enter the elevator with nothing on your head. Individually ask everyone if they like your hat.

Bring a rocking chair. Sit and knit.

Recite gangsta rap lyrics in monotone.

Enter with a shovel, and attempt to "dig for treasure."

Read "Green Eggs and Ham" at the top of your lungs. Sound out every word.

Start laughing maniacally like "muwahahahahaaa!!!!!!!"


"You...are...a...fridge...with wings. We're...freaking...ballet...dancers." Fang

"I know everything, as I continue to remind you." -Fang

"I love Nudge, I really do. But that motor mouth of her's could have turned mother Theresa into an Axe murderer" - Max from Maximum Ride

"Yes! Freaks RULE!" Fang

"Fang! This is a huge break! Of course we should go check it out!"
"But we're grounded."
Max and Fang stare at each other for a second and burst out laughing Max and Fang

"I look like prep school Barbie." Nudge looked at me. "Actually, you look like prep school Barbie. I'm just Barbie's friend." Nudge

"Captain, like the captain of a ship. And then Terror, you know, T-E-R-O-R." Gasman

"You...are...a...fridge...with wings. We're...freaking...ballet...dancers." Fang

"Fang, Fang, Fang. I love you. I love you sooo much."

"Oh, jeez." Max and Fang

"Pick a tree. I'll go carve our initials in it." Fnick

"Because all you mad, evil scientists sit around whipping up batches of Pillsbury's finest during your coffee breaks." Max

"I'll grab a zebra; Gaz, you fill all the bubbles with your trademark scent so people are choking and gagging; and let's throw beef jerky in their eyes! Now, that's a plan!" -Iggy

"Well, I have a highly developed sense of irony." Iggy

"Fang? Are you - like Max?"
"Nope. I'm the smart one." Dr. Martinez and Fang

"Besides my fashion sense? I play a mean harmonica." Fang

"Oh yeah, 'cause Fang is all about the wordy sharing of feelings." Max

"'Iggy, this is not a democracy," I said, understanding his fear but not being able to do anything about it. "It's a Maxocracy.'"-From Max Ride: The Angel Experiment

"Ok, so that did me in. Mr. Rock being all emotional? Expressing feelings?..., total flock hug, and I put my head on Fang's shoulder and cried."- Max, MR4

"The one thing I really can't stand is when Max and the others are in pain or upset. Not upset as in angry or teed off, 'cause God knows if that got to me I'd be totally out of luck." -Fang

I let my jaw drop open, looking from him to Fang and back. And then Iggy was smiling huge in a way he never does, and Fang was grinning in a way he hardly ever does, and I felt like skipping around like a ballerina, which i promise you, I never, ever do." -Max, MR4

"Those wacky Brits called fries 'chips'. And potato chips were 'crisps'. And cookies were 'biscuits'. I had no ideal what real biscuits were called. Wangdoodles?" -Max

Jeb turned to her. "She's incorruptible." Bully for me. "At least by power." I said. "You haven't tried chocolate or cute shoes."-Max and Jeb

"I'm hit, Max. They got me. I guess I'm gonna live fast, die young, and have a beautiful corpse, huh?" -Total to Max

"What's your name?""Isabella von Frankenstein Rothschild."-Angel answering Steve

"South America. It'll be warm. They have llamas. You like llamas." -Max

"I feel like pudding. Pudding with nerve endings. Pudding in great pain." -Iggy

"I vill now destroy de Snickhuhs bahs!" Gazzy to Ter Borchet

I love these 100 question thingies, even though they TOTALLY clog up my profile. xD

1) Are you in a relationship with somebody? hahahaha- oh. you were serious. In that case, no.

2) Do you hate more than 3 people? Umm... if I tallied my real-life enemies, AND my fictional enemies, it'd be about 2000000. So yes.

3) How many houses have you lived in? Like, three?

4) Favorite candy bar? Harry and David 70% cocoa. I like my chocolate:)

5) Favorite shoes? ALEXANDER MCQUEEN. That man is/was AMAZING!

6) Have you ever tripped someone? Well duh.

9) Do you own a Britney Spears CD? Nope.

10) Have you ever thrown up in public? No, thank god.

11) Name one thing that is always on your mind. That stupid song with those lyrics. >(

12) Favorite genre of music? Showtunes and alt rock. Actaully, everything except insane rap.

13) What is your zodiac sign? Virgo.

14) What time were you born? How am I supposed to know? It's not like I could magically read time when I was born!

15) Do you like beer? No.

16) Ever made a prank phone call? Yes!! To my friend Becca's creepy ex.

17) What is the most embarrassing CD you own? A disco CD, with a bunch of fruity songs that went out of style YEARS ago.

18) Are you sarcastic? Naw, duh.

19) What are your favorite colors? The rainbow!!!

20) How many watches do you own? A TON. Seriously, my mom got some from her boss and gave them to me.. And none of them work.. thanks mom.

21) Summer or winter? Winter... I like the snow:)

23) Favorite color to wear? Blue, or black.

24) Pepsi or Sprite? Sprite definitely.

25) What color is your cell phone? Gray.

26) Where is your second home? Probably my best-friend Amy's house.

27) Have you ever slapped someone? Playfully.

28) Have you ever had a cavity? NOPE!

29) How many lamps are in your bedroom? Two, but one of them isn't assembled.

30) How many video games do you own? Not many, I usually I just borrow from Amy, who has like, five thousand. :D

31) What was your first pet? My dad's allergic.. But I do have chickens.

32) Ever had braces? Nope, I have perfect teeth.

33) Do looks matter? Of course, but personality is vital, as well.

34) Do you use chapstick? Yes!

35) Name 3 teachers from your Middle School: A clueless, young Mennonite English teacher, a drabbling, fat Civics teacher who wears picnic blankets, and a godawfully annoying Algebra teacher.

36) American Eagle or Abercombie? Does it matter?

37) Are you too forgiving? No, I actually have trouble forgiving people...

38) How many children do you want? Maybe three. Twins, 2 girls and 1 boy. Or Two kids, 1 boy, 1 girl. Margaret Mary and Victor.

39) Do you own something from Hot Topic? Yeah, I own a LOT of stuff from that store.

40) Favorite breakfast meal? Waffles! Or maybe scones.. they are so yummy!

41) Do you own a gun? Not personally, my brother owns a b-b gun though..

42) Ever thought you were in love? Ha. Nope.

43) When was the last time you cried? I dunno.

44) What did you do 3 nights ago? Sleep. Duh.

45) Olive Garden? La Panera? PANERA!

46) Have you ever called your teacher mommy? I cannot remember that far back...O.o

47) Have you ever been in a castle? Does Mario count?

48) Nicknames? Yo mamma. JK! Yeah, my dad calls me by my middle name.

49) Do you know anyone named Bertha? WORST NAME EVER.. and no.

50) Ever been to Kentucky? YES! Went to visit my cousin.

51) Do you own something from Banana Republic? Yes.

52) Are you thinking about somebody right now? When am I not...?

53) Have you ever called someone Boo? ... As in Boo Radley?

55) Do you own a diamond ring? Not currently.

56) Are you happy with your life right now? Occasionally.

58) Does anyone like you? I dunno. I can't read minds.

59) What year were you born? Um, creeper much?

60) What were you doing in May of 1994? None of your beeswax.

61) Do you own a Backstreet Boys CD? Not my type of music. So no.

62) McDonalds or Wendys? McDonald's fries, Wendy's milkshake thingys.

63) Do you like yourself? Yes, I like myself very much!

64) Are you closer to your mother or father? I love them both!

65) Favorite physical feature of the preferred sex? Hair. Hight. Eyes. General apperance.

66) Are you afraid of the dark? Sometimes... if I'm somewhere I don't know.

67) Have you ever eaten paste? As in glue?

68) Do you own a webcam? Yeah...

69) Have you ever stripped? Yes, when I like, take a shower. Or else I'd shower with my clothes on.

70) Ever broke a bone? No.

72) Do you chat on AIM often? Never.

73) Pringles or Lays? Lays.

74) Have you ever broken someone's heart? Not that I know of..

75) Rugrats or Doug? Rugrats. What is Doug anyways?

76) Full House or The Brady Bunch? BRADY BUNCH!

77) Did you like your middle school guidance counselor? Uh. No?

78) Has anyone ever called you fat? Yes, but only when I'm eating a lot... I'm actually pretty skinny...

80) Do you own a car? No.

81) Can you cook? YESSS.

82) 3 things that annoy you: People who brag when they don't have anything to brag about, people who have bad grammer, and people who say the same thing, over and over, and over.

83) Do you text message often? Occasionally. It's not like my life is attached to my phone.

84) Money or love? Please explain why I can't have both..

85) Do you have any scars? Yeah, right above my lip... fell and my teeth went through my lip. So.. I had to get cosmetic surgery to get it fixed.

86) What do you want more than anything right now? For my life to go the way I want it to. For the next 30 years.

87) Do you enjoy scary movies? Hell to the no!

88) Relationships or one night stands? Relationships, duuhhhh.

89) Big Red or Juicy Fruit? Neither. I'm a Winterfresh girl. :)

90) Do you enjoy greasy food? Um, no. McDonald's fries acually.

91) Have you seen all the Rocky movies? Nooooo.

92) Do you own a box of crayons? BOX? I'm wayyyy beyond a box.. it's more like a bin...

94) Who was the last person that said they loved you? My little brother.

95) Who was the last person that made you mad? I dunno.

96) Who was the last person that made you cry? Not a person exactly, I ran into the door frame...O.O...

97) Who was the last person that made you laugh? Amy, via PM

98) Who was the last person that you fell for? He. No one.

99) Who was the last person that instant messaged you? AMY!(a.k.a Zeldaerp)

100) Who was the last person that called you? Amy, by best friend in the whole entire world!


I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I'm a CHRISTIAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals.
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore.
I'm a DANCER, so I MUST be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I wear BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I fell in love with a MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals.
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I have STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I dye my hair CRAZY COLORS(or about to/want to), so I MUST be looking for attention.
I dress in WEIRD WAYS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm into THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I have a bunch of GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I have a bunch of GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.
I have BIG BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and thats how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so I must be GAY TOO.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited.
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm HAWAIIAN, so I MUST be lazy.
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas.
I'm a STONER, so I MUST be going in the wrong direction.
I'm a VIRGIN, so I MUST be prude.
I'm STRAIGHT EDGE, so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE, so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER, so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK, so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN, so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm CHRISTIAN, so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED, so I MUST be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends, so I MUST think I'm black
I'm GOTH, so I MUST worship the devil.
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT like everyone else, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I MUST be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN, so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE, so I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN, so I MUST ride a horse
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, So I must be gay
I draw ANIME, so I MUST be to a freak.
I am a FANGIRL, so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I WATCH PORN, so I MUST be perverted.
I'm an ONLY CHILD, so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT, so I MUST be weak
I am AMERICAN, so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH, so I MUST love sheep
I'm SCOTTISH, so I MUST have ginger hair and wear a skirts (It's actually called a kilt)
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers. (I hate hockey, but I love beavers although I've never actually seen one.)
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT, I MUST be having cyber sex.
I'm PAGAN, so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I'm PAGAN, so I MUST worship Satan
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion
I'm SWEDISH, so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG, so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian, so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo’s
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I’m GAY, so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND, so I MUST be Lesbian.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN, so I MUST just need converting.
I LOVE MARCHING BAND, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I am friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.
I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp.
I CAN'T HELP BUT POINT OUT EVERY MISTAKE, so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist
I'm a PERFECTIONIST, so I MUST check everything ten times, then burst into tears at one mistake
I DON’T like to talk about my personal life, so I MUST be having problems
I like FIRE, so I must be an arsonist

100 Themes for any fiction

1. Ice Cream

2. Singing

3. Balloons

4. Monkey

5. Whipped Cream

6. Time

7. Stars

8. Birthday

9. Forgetful

10. Pillows

11. Warriors

12. Bread

13. Gratitude

14 .Weights

15. Technology

16. Evil

17. Apple

18. Vacuum

19. Calender

20. Sky

21. Christmas

22. Popsicles

23. Teeth

24. Routine

25. Wardrobe

26. Rockers

27. Public Speaking

28. Music

29. Hair

30. Meal

31. Cooking

32. Grandparents

33. Art

34. Purple

35. Philosophy

36. Chicken

37. Rough

38. Think

39. Slimy

40. Octopus

41. Oppurtunity

42. Statistics

43. School

44. Galaxy

45. Anticipation

46. Weird

47. Awkward

48. Yoga

49. Bears

50. Fitness

51. Broccoli

52. Swimming

53. Farm

54. Attitude

55. Maps

56. Free Time

57. Dogs

58. Chestnuts

59. Thermostat

60. Light

61. Matches

62. Violin

63. Anger

64. Piano

65. Parents

66. Wings

67. Yellow

68. Trees

69. Outdoors

70. Circles

71. Drama

72. Business

73. Books

74. Numbers

75. Chair

76. Table

77. Telephone

78. Soft

79. Pure Hearted

80. Knowledge

81. Empty

82. Gems

83. Steel

84. Thief

85. Style

86. Fans

87. Personality

88. Sticker

89. Hot

90. Glass

91. Alive

92. Paint

93. Pictures

94. Boat

95. Fruit

96. Animals

97. Fire

98. Greenbeans

99. Zits

100. Finale

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Parisian Passion by green-eyed-wonder 0-0 reviews
Max met him on an airplane to Paris. She liked him instantly. What's not to like: the shaggy hair, the mysterious black eyes, the rough, deepvoice and the perfect lips. But it didn't matter. It's not like she was going to see him after that incident anyways. So when she sees him everywhere...what does she think? Stalker much? Nope. At least, not according to him. More like Destiny.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 10,021 - Reviews: 73 - Favs: 57 - Follows: 86 - Updated: 4/9 - Published: 8/18/2012 - Max, Fang
That Moment When by thestupidgenius1123 reviews
That awkward moment between birth and death. Fax. Collection of one-shots. [Disclaimer: I do not own Maximum Ride. All rights reserved to James Patterson. No infringement or copyright intended.]
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 27 - Words: 31,887 - Reviews: 666 - Favs: 157 - Follows: 160 - Updated: 2/14 - Published: 3/24/2013 - Max, Fang
Music, Meadows, and Memories by WingedQuill1 reviews
She is a country girl with trust issues after her best friend betrayed her. He is an international pop-star who would give it all up if he could eat his words and get his best friend back. When he is sent on a month-long school trip to her family farm, will secrets be revealed? Will wounds be reopened? Will sparks fly? One thing's for sure: I smell FAX! T for language & alcoholism
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 4 - Words: 12,574 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 37 - Updated: 10/13/2014 - Published: 6/2/2014 - Max, Fang, Jeb B.
Mistake or Blessing? by ValentineRose28 reviews
Max and Fang have just been unexpectantly dumped. When their friends drag them out to a bar and they meet, it isn't exactly love at first sight. But, after a couple drinks, they start to think a bit differently. They're in for a surprise in the morning!
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 22 - Words: 53,989 - Reviews: 682 - Favs: 246 - Follows: 278 - Updated: 8/30/2014 - Published: 8/3/2010 - Max, Fang - Complete
The One Night Stand by beanie hats reviews
Max wakes up in a predicament. She's hung over and barely remembers last night. Her head throbs like crazy. Oh, and to top it all off, she's naked. In bed. With her (also naked) best friend, Fang. No wings AU, one shot.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,117 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 8 - Published: 7/14/2014 - Max, Fang, Nudge - Complete
A Kiss To My Prince by Cutie Bunny reviews
"I'll let you be the angel who makes the devil repent." After an incident with all the right intentions goes awry. Will Yuri be able to hand the consequence? Yuri wakes up 125 years back in past in Ciel's bed. Stuck in 1887, she helps Ciel and Sebastian to complete their missions as Queen's guard dog. Things get turned topsy turvy when they get tangled deeply and romance unfolds.
Kuroshitsuji - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 21 - Words: 119,328 - Reviews: 535 - Favs: 387 - Follows: 190 - Updated: 6/23/2014 - Published: 6/30/2012 - Ciel P., Sebastian M., Alois T., Claude F. - Complete
The Language of Madness by YoungAndBored reviews
What would you do if your father kidnapped you and put you in a fake mental hospital so he could experiment on you? And what about when two girls just like you come along and you escape? And what if you fall in love? FAX. T just because.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 10 - Words: 11,076 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 5/2/2014 - Published: 8/26/2011 - Max, Fang
Feel My Dubstep by AlyNova reviews
For Max, a deaf 17 y/o, life hadn't always been silent. She once knew what sound was like, now years after the incident, Max craves to find something to make her happy. Maybe a summer with her Aunt and cousins in Portland wouldn't be bad at all. Maybe she could find happiness in music through a mysterious Dubstep artist's dreams. FAX
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 17 - Words: 42,403 - Reviews: 159 - Favs: 72 - Follows: 110 - Updated: 1/31/2014 - Published: 6/23/2012 - Fang, Max
School by ashleen-bvb-543 reviews
The flock have settled down at Dr.Martinez's for a while,but what will happen to the serene peaceful life when Max drops a huge bomb on them?R&R.Some FAX & EGGY!RATED T to be safe cos of a bit TOO much EGGY.Not the average m.r. school fanfiction...
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 8,675 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 1/7/2014 - Published: 1/29/2012 - Iggy, Ella
Plan: Lose A Guy In Ten Days by Fanna Girl reviews
Max is happy and single when she gets a job: Find a way to lose a guy in ten days. Fang is a player who breaks up with a girl after one week, so he gets a bet: Date a girl for longer than ten days. And they've chosen their dates - each other. Who will win and who will fall?
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 13,161 - Reviews: 203 - Favs: 83 - Follows: 134 - Updated: 10/26/2013 - Published: 4/21/2012 - Fang, Max
A Summer with Me, Myself, and I by Another Sarcastic Teenager reviews
Bad-boy Nicholas 'Fang' Granger has been playing girls since the time he was practically in diapers. However, when his…tendencies land him on yet another tabloid cover, his publicist has had enough. No girls all summer or else. Too bad old friends who've grown up in all the right places are going to make that very difficult.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 13,989 - Reviews: 56 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 81 - Updated: 10/23/2013 - Published: 4/6/2013 - Max, Fang
Party Boys Like You Don't Save Cinderellas Like Me by dreams-and-schemes86 reviews
Maximum Ride is a semi-normal girl who's trying hard to live life right. Nick Walker is a famous singer with a rep for being a "Party Boy". What will happen when they accidently meet at a concert? And what will Nick do to win over Max? Major Fax! Rated T. *no wings*
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 34 - Words: 33,275 - Reviews: 1144 - Favs: 243 - Follows: 352 - Updated: 10/11/2013 - Published: 6/17/2012 - Max, Fang
Sweep Away Love by JfKCrookShanks reviews
Max is forced into a 3 week Sleep Away Camp. Where she is expected to "Make friends" And "Become a better person" And her life does change when she meets Fang, Tall, dark, Tan and handsome. Will Max allow herself to fall in love? Is she ready for a relationship again? FAX FAX FAX FAX FAX!
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 18 - Words: 37,424 - Reviews: 249 - Favs: 69 - Follows: 98 - Updated: 8/4/2013 - Published: 7/8/2012 - Max, Fang
I Met Him In Detention by Silent and courious reviews
Max and her dance group are the best dancers in town. A new boy moves into town and all the girls in school starts crushing on him. Except, Max and her bestfriend. When they both end up in detention together, they find out something they have in common. Fax, Iggy X OC, Ella x Iggy. Adopted from XxCoolLikeFirexX
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 8,551 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 40 - Updated: 7/15/2013 - Published: 8/24/2012 - Max, Fang
Fighting For a Place in This World by NightWrighter511 reviews
Maximum Batchelder has spent the last five years keeping herself and her friend alive on the streets of New York City. The world is cruel, especially to a couple of street kids, but Max has found a place she fits in: street fighting. Of course, it only takes one night to change everything. Now Max must reinvent herself. What else is expected from someone in Witness Protection? FAX
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 42 - Words: 119,033 - Reviews: 1088 - Favs: 248 - Follows: 197 - Updated: 5/23/2013 - Published: 12/31/2012 - Max, Fang - Complete
Who's For Whom by MPHknows reviews
Four girls who need the perfect man and fast. Four men who are willing to go through countless test to see who they are perfect for. Will they end up with who they want to, or will the matching be off completely? Will the superstars, Venomaze, be able to find their perfect matches? And will these men be able to keep from killing each other? Fax, Liggy, Naidan, Kylan.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 4,987 - Reviews: 66 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 42 - Updated: 5/12/2013 - Published: 6/19/2011 - Max, Fang
The 7 Week Plan by VampireRide reviews
Max, Lissa, Nudge, Brigid, Angel, Maya, Iggy and Ella are BFF's. But when a new guy comes to town, all that changes with the girls. Six girls want him, and despite the promise they made, it's not counting. Now, Max has a plan for them. But She becomes torn apart into too many pieces, which friend should she help? Which friend should she betray? Promise it's awesomer than sounds!
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 24 - Words: 47,371 - Reviews: 332 - Favs: 68 - Follows: 83 - Updated: 5/3/2013 - Published: 6/12/2012 - Max, Fang - Complete
Sand by GracefullyFallingDown reviews
Fang buys a summers worth of surfing lessons from Max, but as they get to know each other better, will it turn into something more? Snarky comments, sexy Fang, and maybe a bit of summer love. However, the tourists don't stay forever, and three months might not always be enough when it comes to those forever kind of things. AU. AH. FAX.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,785 - Reviews: 55 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 55 - Updated: 4/26/2013 - Published: 2/24/2013 - Max, Fang
The Quiet Librarian by PeridotPoppy reviews
Librarians never got much attention, did they... A story about Maria MM for Regardless1604's 100 theme challenge!
Harvest Moon - Rated: K - English - Family/Friendship - Chapters: 29 - Words: 2,811 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 4/4/2013 - Published: 6/6/2012 - Maria
To a Good Home by Rensarou reviews
Witch's spell backfires, Hikari is turned into a cat, and Witch leaves the poor farmer on Wizard's front doorstep in a box labeled, "TO A GOOD HOME." Forced to live as a cat while Wizard struggles to change her back, the beginning of a new chapter unfolds. One of magic, love, mystery, and a snickering Witch on the sidelines.
Harvest Moon - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 8,328 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 42 - Updated: 3/23/2013 - Published: 1/21/2013 - Molly/Hikari, Wizard
Ouran High School Hostess Club by DreamstoNightmares1 reviews
Re-doing this entire story! (again) Instead of putting it here, im going to put a link to the new story up here, leave it for a few weeks (maybe months) and later I'll delete it. I'm so sorry to my readers, and my hostess members! Dream
Ouran High School Host Club - Rated: M - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 12 - Words: 27,676 - Reviews: 48 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 3/22/2013 - Published: 6/20/2012 - Kyōya O., Mori/Takashi M., Hunny/Honey/Mitsukuni H., Haruhi F.
Their Remix by WordFairy237 reviews
She is a dancer. A great one too. She is a nobody. He is the most popular boy in school's bestfriend. He is an amazing dancer. No one really knows who he truly is. Not even his "bestfriend". They are forced to become dance partners. What will come of this, especially since his "bestfriend" and her tormentor see them dancing... together. Divide /0 did the cover. OcxOC human
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,460 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 3/17/2013 - Published: 12/22/2012 - Iggy, Fang
Another Form of the Avian Bird Flu by St. Fang of Boredom reviews
So, Fang gets sick. The flu, to be exact. And, of course, he has to pull a whole 'Whining Macho Prince' thing about it. Max and Dr. Martinez deal with Fang's attitude, Iggy tries to boycott Campbell's Soup, the Flock play with a blender, and...FAX! Eggy!
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 68 - Words: 103,238 - Reviews: 4129 - Favs: 1,135 - Follows: 827 - Updated: 3/13/2013 - Published: 10/3/2008 - Fang, Max
The Heart Wants What it Wants by Lexiiforeverxxx reviews
Maxine Batchler, your normal teen girl who didn't have many problems. Her dad makes her go greet the neighbors who moved in across the street and meets Fang. The college boy is who 3 years older. FAX, AU, T
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 16 - Words: 28,386 - Reviews: 220 - Favs: 88 - Follows: 131 - Updated: 1/25/2013 - Published: 1/18/2012 - Max, Fang
Juliet Never Wore Converses by yellow.r0se reviews
"Everyone in the grade- heck, everyone in Ferryport Landing High knew that Sabrina and Puck were sworn enemies." Not even the school play could dissolve their tension. But maybe...
Sisters Grimm - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 27 - Words: 70,323 - Reviews: 1310 - Favs: 245 - Follows: 293 - Updated: 12/31/2012 - Published: 12/31/2011 - Sabrina G., Puck
The Life of MR by JAMZD reviews
Max is ready to die, but before she does, she wants her daughter to know exactly who she was and who she is. Follow Dawn as she reads all about her mysterious mother's past. Maybe she'll even find out who her real father is...
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 13 - Words: 14,851 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 11/8/2012 - Published: 1/29/2012 - Max, Fang - Complete
Locked In by Like.Wait.WHAT reviews
A simple hanging in overdue work turned into me being a prisoner in my school gym with a guy I knew nothing about. This was going to be one hell of a night. But he was pretty cute... FAX! **Hilarious ensures!**
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 24 - Words: 36,938 - Reviews: 552 - Favs: 258 - Follows: 228 - Updated: 10/3/2012 - Published: 6/12/2011 - Max, Fang - Complete
My High School Life by Timelord-Kenzie reviews
Max Ride has a complicated life. What happenes when a new neighbor moves in? It get's worse. Max and her new best friend have funny adventures ahead of them. Will Love be one of them? Fax, Eggy, Nari. All human
Maximum Ride - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 24 - Words: 69,484 - Reviews: 196 - Favs: 95 - Follows: 113 - Updated: 9/18/2012 - Published: 12/9/2011 - Max, Fang
The One That Got Away by PiperElizabethMcLean reviews
Fang and Iggy, good friends, face problems when Iggy's sister Max moves to Arizona. He moves to Cali to live with his dad, leaving instructions for Fang to take care of Max. So how does Fang keep the boys away when he's falling for her himself? Rated T, AU, no wings
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 33 - Words: 60,722 - Reviews: 1252 - Favs: 382 - Follows: 356 - Updated: 8/5/2012 - Published: 12/15/2011 - Max, Fang - Complete
Highschool to the Maximum by Spunky Violet reviews
Max and Ella have just moved from sunny Cali to boring old PA. But will Max enjoy herself more than she thought? There will be FAX. Slight Miggy. But then back to FAX. It's an overdone plot but I wanna do it anyway :D R&R It's better than it sounds. *HI GUYS I MADE A TUMBLR AND YOU SHOULD FOLLOW ME THERE LINK IN MY BIO*
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 18 - Words: 22,051 - Reviews: 192 - Favs: 102 - Follows: 69 - Updated: 7/31/2012 - Published: 2/18/2012 - Max, Fang - Complete
My BlondeHaired, Sun Streaked Wonder by bordeaux cookies reviews
According to Max, Fang's 'Wonder' is a redhead - Lissa Thomas. He tries to explain to her that his wonder isn't Lissa, nor a redhead; she's blonde, sunstreaked, and standing right in front of him! Fang's POV. FAX! AU! AH!
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 15 - Words: 19,007 - Reviews: 270 - Favs: 154 - Follows: 122 - Updated: 7/21/2012 - Published: 2/4/2012 - Max, Fang - Complete
MR Drabbles by Karma's a Beauty reviews
Many drabbles consisting of stories about Maximum Ride. AU and OOC-ness is included. Most are Flock-centered; other characters are included. Prompts and Themes are welcome!
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 66 - Words: 25,452 - Reviews: 149 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 6/23/2012 - Published: 11/30/2011 - Max - Complete
Something RomeoandJulietish by OwlinAMinor reviews
It's like Romeo and Juliet, only funnier, less depressing, more perverted, and with a whole lot more Bacon. Eggy. Gazzy/OC. Fax in later chapters. Read at your own risk.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 25 - Words: 89,496 - Reviews: 339 - Favs: 77 - Follows: 65 - Updated: 6/22/2012 - Published: 6/20/2011 - Iggy, Ella - Complete
Letters Of Love by PeaceLoveMusic779 reviews
Max and Fang have never met, but that will change with a certain school assignment. FAX later : Horrible summary, right? Ugh. Oh well.. Its like 2 a.m. ADOPTED BY: Max is Awesomesauce
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 13 - Words: 14,086 - Reviews: 101 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 41 - Updated: 6/20/2012 - Published: 3/17/2012 - Fang, Max - Complete
Play It Safe Candace by magikarp27 reviews
Luke asks Candace on a date, and an onslaught of raw and difficult emotions ensue. LukexCandace, T for safety purposes.
Harvest Moon - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,179 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/12/2012 - Luke, Candace - Complete
Writing to Him by Jabberjay reviews
Studying in an all girls school, Max is assigned to a guy from an all boys school to write to. Soon, she becomes great friends with that 'Fang' guy behind the letters. However, how is this connected to the guy she hates? AU/AH. Fax, and Eggy. ON HIATUS
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 9 - Words: 8,175 - Reviews: 94 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 69 - Updated: 3/20/2012 - Published: 1/13/2012 - Max, Fang
Most Wonderful Time of the Year by GallagherZammieBlackthorne reviews
During the holiday time there is nothing better to do than sing Christmas carols, all is fun and games until Fang and Max finds out about Ella and Iggy's "shower". From Ella's Uggs to Iggy's Ugly sweater we've got it all. Tons of Eggy!
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,741 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 3/1/2012 - Published: 11/20/2011 - Ella, Iggy
A Kitty Kat: OneShot Series by Silver Inklett reviews
Ch 5: A White Kat: "If you had ever told Katarina Bishop that one day she would be walking down the aisle in an ivory dress, she would have laughed in your face."
Heist Society - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 9,363 - Reviews: 86 - Favs: 88 - Follows: 86 - Updated: 2/22/2012 - Published: 6/28/2011 - Katarina B./Kat, W.W. Hale
The Mighty Crest by Stone Moss reviews
Fiske has important news that he has been keeping a secret for quite a while. He gathers the family for a reunion and they only know one thing...whatever Fiske is planning will change their lives...forever.
39 Clues - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 25 - Words: 39,075 - Reviews: 459 - Favs: 129 - Follows: 94 - Updated: 2/11/2012 - Published: 7/12/2011 - Amy C., Ian K.
1 Boy 1 Girl 1 World by WordsUnsaid reviews
Max's mom lives in Arizona, Her dad lives in California. Fang's family moves to town. What happened when they meet? One thing! It's gonna be one hell of a summer!
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Family - Chapters: 4 - Words: 2,976 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 2/9/2012 - Published: 10/23/2011 - Max, Fang
Not At All by Epiphany On Toast reviews
Sequel to Normal, At Least, I Hope So. After the Halloween fiasco, Puck and Sabrina are finding out about the simple complicatedness of high school. And something is about to make it way more complicated: Daphne knows.
Sisters Grimm - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 7,512 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 1/6/2012 - Published: 11/30/2011 - Sabrina G., Puck
The Many Ways To Kill Dylan by Jabberjay reviews
The ways to kill Dylan! :D Originally Death By FANGirls. T for character death.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 13 - Words: 6,552 - Reviews: 41 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 12/31/2011 - Published: 10/14/2011 - Dylan
Age Difference by superdope reviews
Ella has always been younger than Iggy. That has always been a obstacle to over come. But it won't be as bad as she thinks. Come as we exlpore their, age difference.
Maximum Ride - Rated: K - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 3,621 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 12/26/2011 - Published: 3/24/2011 - Ella, Iggy - Complete
Pronage by AriBaecker reviews
High school story. Probably done before. Max/Fang, Ella/Iggy, Nudge/Gazzy, Adriana/Alex. R&R!
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,216 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Published: 5/2/2011
Hidden Behind A Smile by theuglyswaninlove reviews
Yeah, another Fax high school story. BUT WITH AN EDGE? Rated T for language and future... you know.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 4 - Words: 4,314 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 1/8/2011 - Published: 12/6/2010 - Fang, Max
ZXC by Aquapphire reviews
He led me into his room and over to the computer on the desk. "Look," he said, pointing to the keyboard. I read what his finger pointed to. The keys, in order from left to right, read 'ZXC'. ONESHOT
Gallagher Girls - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 801 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 42 - Follows: 9 - Published: 11/14/2010 - Cammie M., Zach G. - Complete
Little Words by OwlinAMinor reviews
One-shot. I was disappointed at the end of Deathly Hallows that Harry and Ginny didn't have a cute make-up scene even if they're married in the epilogue , so I wrote one. WARNING: Very romantic kissing involved . HarryxGinny supporters ONLY!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,125 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 12 - Published: 4/8/2010 - Harry P., Ginny W. - Complete
5 Ways to Get a Girl's Number by theycallherkaush reviews
He was a spy, after all; how hard could it be to get her number? Charm intact, he fixed his tie and proceeded down the corridor. Easy. It would be as easy as convincing Grant that Bex was a lesbian. Z/C. Fun-shot #1
Gallagher Girls - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,208 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 83 - Follows: 20 - Published: 8/18/2009 - Cammie M., Zach G. - Complete
Lilacs by BlueMyst19 reviews
It seemed like the classic tale of love, intrigue, and murder most foul. Prince Daniel was a rebellious prince with a secret he hid from the world. Princess Samantha was to be the love of his life, but her own secret could tear them apart. SevereAU DS TJ
Danny Phantom - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 50,009 - Reviews: 422 - Favs: 365 - Follows: 105 - Updated: 8/12/2006 - Published: 12/26/2005 - Sam M., Danny F. - Complete
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Memories to Last a Lifetime reviews
Every year, the girls hold a reunion, to keep in touch and to let their kids see each other. Every year, they pick something special to do. This year, they retell all their memories of their lives.
Gallagher Girls - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 4,855 - Reviews: 59 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 48 - Updated: 7/14/2014 - Published: 12/30/2012 - Cammie M., Zach G.
Occupy Tom Nook reviews
When people get fed up with Nook, bad things happen begin to happen...
Animal Crossing - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 8 - Words: 3,980 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 12/30/2013 - Published: 6/11/2012 - Timmy, Tommy, Tom Nook, Tortimer
100 Prompts reviews
100 words for 100 prompts.
Heist Society - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 438 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 8/8/2012 - Published: 8/7/2012 - Katarina B./Kat
Nightmare reviews
When Max sees everyone she loves die in a gruesome nightmare, will Fang comfort her? Oneshot. Absolute fluff!
Maximum Ride - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 519 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 2 - Published: 1/3/2012 - Max, Fang - Complete