Squilf
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Joined 12-26-10, id: 2671949, Profile Updated: 11-06-14
Author has written 23 stories for Merlin, Pride and Prejudice, Aliens/Predator, Doctor Who, Inception, Sherlock, X-Men: The Movie, Call the Midwife, Luther, and Hannibal.

EDIT: APRIL 2014 -- As I'm sure it's obvious, I've taken a bit of a break from writing and all things online. I'm sorry for my absence and not updating my WIPs and I hope no-one is too upset. I've written a little bit more about what's happened on my tumblr. The fan community has always been amazing and I am so grateful for everyone who read, reviewed and faved my fics. I love you all!

Hello. I'm Squilf. I'm also on LiveJournal as squilf, deviantART as Squilfy, tumblr as squilf and AO3 as squilf - I'd love to add you lovely people on other sites!

Readers, reviewers and favourites are always celebrated with a little happy dance and the imminent baking of scones. I do try respond to each review, but I am sorry if I take a while to get back to you. I'm probably baking scones.

My friends PalindromeIsntOne and ADashOfInsanity are amazing authors, and have so not paid me to say that.

Some truly amazing people have been kind enough to make art or translate my fics into several languages and I can't thank them enough. You can find the links to these in my fic list below. (I thought it might make a bit more sense if I listed all my fics like this, by fandom and series, 'cause there's a few of them now, in a few places!)

Alien: Resurrection (Ripley/Call)
Brave New World

Bad Education (Mitchell/Rem Dogg)
Exceptional

Call The Midwife (Sister Bernadette/Dr Turner)
No Sin to Love

Doctor Who (Eleven/Rory)
Regrets and Repairs

Hannibal (Hannibal/Will)
some of them want to abuse you

Inception (Arthur/Eames)

AUs
How To Woo Your Maiden
*with art by voidcollar
Under The Weather (WIP)
All I Want For Christmas Is You (WIP)
The World Is Probably Enough to be Getting On With (WIP)

Talking Wounded 'verse
Kiss Me, Kill Me
*translated into Russian by arisuaiko (diary.ru / Ao3)
*translated into French by Cheschire cat

Paris, Je T'Aime (can be read as a standalone or as the sequel to Kiss Me, Kill Me)
*translated into Russian by arisuaiko (diary.ru / Ao3)

Britcollege 'verse
I'm Okay
*with art by wingzjd
I'm Not Okay
Everything's Okay (WIP)

Luther (Ripley/Luther)
A Terrible Something (or, what happens when DS Justin Ripley snogs a senior officer in front of about half the London constabulary)
The Terrible Things We Do for Love
Point Me to the Skies

Marble Hornets (Tim/Jay)
Never Write Lovesongs on the Ukulele
That Random Dude Brian Brought Along

Merlin

(Merlin/Gwaine)
Twas The Knight Before Yuletide
*with art by disco-mouse
What to Do When a Handsome Knight Asks You to Bed (can be read as a standalone or as the sequel to 'Twas The Knight Before Yuletide)
Enough (or, a history of goodbyes)

(Merlin/Mordred)
Angel in the Attic


Pride & Prejudice
(Darcy/Wickham)
Iceskating

Sherlock (Sherlock/John)
(These fics can be read as standalones or as a series.)
Must Be Mad
More Than I Am
Lovers of the Lost
Of Course, Of Course

The Voice UK
Dope Isn't A Word

X-Men (Charles/Erik)
The Runaways
*based on this art by xgogolex

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Boy In The Corner by PalindromeIsntOne reviews
-drabble- Sherlock is the boy in the corner. Some like him and some don't, but few forget him. A series of short insights as he grows up, from different points of view. Sherlock/John.
Sherlock - Rated: K - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 990 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 2 - Published: 1/25/2012 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
No, no regrets by PalindromeIsntOne reviews
In which Arthur has a nightmare, Eames doesn't understand French, and everything gets translated. ArthurxEames adorableness. Basically the fluffiest piece of fluff ever. Includes full English translation of 'Non, je ne regrette rien'. Not a songfic.
Inception - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,966 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/4/2011 - Eames, Arthur - Complete
Cas' Milkshake by zeppx reviews
It brings all the boys to the yard.
Supernatural - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 571 - Reviews: 291 - Favs: 1,293 - Follows: 96 - Published: 9/6/2011 - Castiel, Dean W. - Complete
The Ela's Disguise by PalindromeIsntOne reviews
Merlin tries to catch a mischievous Ela faerie whilst trying to deal with his feelings for Arthur. But neither task is going to be as simple as it originally seemed... GwainexMerlin, ArthurxGwen
Merlin - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 19,197 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 54 - Updated: 7/23/2011 - Published: 12/25/2010 - Merlin, Gwaine
Rory's Dilemma by Katy Fisher reviews
Weird stuff happens when the Doctor and Rory are together without Amy as a buffer.
Doctor Who - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,484 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 42 - Follows: 2 - Published: 5/18/2011 - 11th Doctor, Rory W. - Complete
Alone On the Water by MadLori reviews
Sherlock is diagnosed with a terminal illness. Warning: angst like whoa.
Sherlock - Rated: K - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,210 - Reviews: 5090 - Favs: 11,690 - Follows: 1,366 - Published: 4/17/2011 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
See You in Another Life by HiM'e'iTSu reviews
They keep meeting again and again, dozens of times. But is it reality or a dream? Arthur/Eames
Inception - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,217 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 2 - Published: 2/23/2011 - Arthur, Eames - Complete
A Blue Christmas by PalindromeIsntOne reviews
Marth plans to tell Ike he's gay at the upcoming Christmas party, but worries about spoiling their friendship.
Super Smash Brothers - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 10,603 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 2/15/2011 - Published: 12/25/2010 - Marth, Ike - Complete
New heart, dear heart by insipidity reviews
Always spoilers to the latest episode. Starts with recaps of Gwaine and Merlin's canon time together. Later, some other stuff comes up. Includes other characters like A, L, P and briefly E and Gwe.
Merlin - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 19 - Words: 43,122 - Reviews: 43 - Favs: 47 - Follows: 34 - Updated: 12/27/2010 - Published: 10/31/2010 - Merlin, Gwaine - Complete
Endurance by paxbanana reviews
Trudy has the luck to find everlasting love on an alien planet with a woman who can't think past her research. femslash
Avatar - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,095 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 5 - Published: 12/18/2010 - Trudy C., Grace A. - Complete
Long Live The King by shadowglove reviews
AU. What if when the Great Dragon said that Mordred would 'kill' Arthur he didn't exactly mean it the way it sounded? Mordred discovers that he fulfilled that prophecy, while living in Arthur's court, loving Emrys, and Arthur still alive on the throne.
Merlin - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,165 - Reviews: 131 - Favs: 626 - Follows: 79 - Published: 8/27/2009 - Mordred, Merlin - Complete
Wanted: Roommate Normal Need Not Apply by PrincessButtercup83 reviews
This is where I would write a summary, but I'm going to make you read it to find out what it's about. Ha!
Big Bang Theory - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,823 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 218 - Follows: 23 - Published: 7/28/2009 - Sheldon C., Penny - Complete
A Parody: Tess Of The D'Urbervilles by GothicPenguin367 reviews
A parody of the book. Lots of crack and randomness. Since the book is so 'depressing', I thought it needed lightening up a bit. Please read and review, I hope you enjoy!
Tess of the D'Urbervilles - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,800 - Reviews: 46 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 19 - Published: 4/18/2009
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

some of them want to abuse you reviews
If Hanni Lecter were a good woman, she would let Wilona Graham be. Hanni Lecter is not a good woman. Non-con, femslash, sex.
Hannibal - Rated: M - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,042 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/24/2013 - Will G., Hannibal L. - Complete
How To Woo Your Maiden reviews
Sir Eames of Zenith is a bad boy. But when he meets the young Prince Arthur of Camelot, he's plunged headfirst into deep, smushy love. With only the help of his snarky manservant Yusuf and a book called How to Woo Your Maiden, Eames tries to become a chivalrous knight, and prove to Arthur that he truly loves him. Slash, brief underage kissing, sex, swearing, some violence, crack.
Inception - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 11 - Words: 34,379 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 4/3/2013 - Published: 8/14/2012 - Arthur, Eames
A Terrible Something reviews
(... or, what happens when DS Justin Ripley snogs a senior officer in front of about half the London constabulary.) John steps out of the back of a lorry punched open with bullet holes with something broken in his eyes and petrol soaked into his coat, dripping from his eyelashes, his fingers. And Justin doesn't know if he hates him or loves him. (Except, he kind of does.)
Luther - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,211 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 5 - Published: 3/27/2013 - J. Luther - Complete
Under The Weather reviews
Arthur and Eames have what is possibly the most dysfunctional office romance ever. Cue flirting that verges on sexual harassment in the workplace, inappropriate texting - and even more inappropriate touching - with a few moments of domesticity and love.
Inception - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 12 - Words: 31,554 - Reviews: 165 - Favs: 159 - Follows: 171 - Updated: 3/9/2013 - Published: 4/2/2012 - Arthur, Eames
Angel in the Attic reviews
Merlin can't let Arthur in. Not anymore. He can't take his head in his hands and kiss him, can't keep giving in to him. He can't let Arthur take and take and take. – Or, it's the night before Christmas, and Arthur is screaming the house down. For thenarator's prompt at the lovethatbindsus Merdred kink meme. Merlin/Mordred, Merlin/Arthur. Warnings for violence, abuse and death.
Merlin - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,580 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 5 - Published: 3/5/2013 - Merlin, Arthur
No Sin to Love reviews
You let him kiss you, because you love him. You pull away, because you can't. You can't, and yet you do. A glance at how Sister Bernadette's feelings for Doctor Turner change and grow. Spoilers up to 2x05.
Call the Midwife - Rated: K - English - Romance/Spiritual - Chapters: 1 - Words: 557 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/19/2013 - Complete
Enough (or, a history of goodbyes) reviews
Gwaine falls in love with a drowning man, and he has to watch him drown. But then, of course, he starts drowning too. A history of goodbyes between Merlin and Gwaine. Spoilers from 3x04 to 5x13. Swearing, sexual references, death, slash.
Merlin - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,764 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/12/2013 - Gwaine, Merlin - Complete
All I Want For Christmas Is You reviews
... and the Star Trek Voyager Complete Collection DVD, but mostly you. This story is about a boy called Arthur. It's also about a boy called Eames. And a load of other people too. And a ghost. And Christmas. But mostly Arthur and Eames.
Inception - Rated: T - English - Humor/Supernatural - Chapters: 6 - Words: 19,428 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 22 - Updated: 11/28/2012 - Published: 12/28/2011 - Arthur, Eames
Everything's Okay reviews
Eames loves Arthur. Arthur loves him back. But that doesn't mean they're happy. References to self-harm, drug addiction, death and abuse. This is the third part of the Britcollege 'verse - I'm Okay, I'm Not Okay, and Everything's Okay. They can be read as a series, or as stand-alone stories.
Inception - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 14,438 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 11/26/2012 - Published: 9/20/2012 - Arthur, Eames
The Runaways reviews
Charles and Raven are a brother and sister growing up together in Nazi Germany, utterly unaware of all that is going on around them. Then everything changes. There are many things they do not understand about their world, and these are the things that hurt them the most. Cherik. References to Nazi ideology and Auschwitz. Non-explicit death, torture, homosexuality and underage sex.
X-Men: The Movie - Rated: M - English - Angst/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,263 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 4 - Published: 10/26/2012 - Charles Xavier/Professor X, Erik L./Magneto - Complete
I'm Not Okay reviews
Arthur is a messed-up sixteen-year-old. He hates sixth form, he hurts himself, he falls into trouble, he falls in love. Some self-harm, mild dub-con. This is the second part of the Britcollege 'verse - I'm Okay, I'm Not Okay, and Everything's Okay. They can be read as a series, or as stand-alone stories.
Inception - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,882 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 3 - Published: 8/20/2012 - Arthur, Eames - Complete
I'm Okay reviews
Arthur and Eames are in a band. Eames falls in love with Arthur, skinny and sixteen, because he sings like he's running out of oxygen, because he plays like he's running out of seconds. References to mental health issues. This is the first part of the Britcollege 'verse - I'm Okay, I'm Not Okay, and Everything's Okay. They can be read as a series, or as stand-alone stories.
Inception - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,450 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 4 - Published: 6/7/2012 - Arthur, Eames - Complete
Of Course, Of Course reviews
It comes down to this: John Watson has a job as a doctor and a wife who doesn't love him anymore and a hole in his heart for a man who left him long ago. Swearing, grief, infidelity, mild slash. This is the fourth story in a series of fics - Must Be Mad, More Than I Am, Lovers of the Lost, and Of Course, Of Course. They can be read as a series, or as stand-alone stories.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,823 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 2 - Published: 4/29/2012 - John W., Sherlock H.
Lovers of the Lost reviews
It's never easy, leaving someone. Wherever you go. This is the third story in a series of fics - Must Be Mad, More Than I Am, Lovers of the Lost, and Of Course, Of Course. They can be read as a series, or as stand-alone stories.
Sherlock - Rated: K - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,528 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 4 - Published: 3/18/2012 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete
More Than I Am reviews
John Watson is in love with a madman. And the madman is in love with him. He thinks. Slash, swearing, some mild injury. Slight spoilers for series two. This is the second story in a series of fics - Must Be Mad, More Than I Am, Lovers of the Lost, and Of Course, Of Course. They can be read as a series, or as stand-alone stories.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,751 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 108 - Follows: 6 - Published: 2/17/2012 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
Must Be Mad reviews
There are some things that none of us can understand. Things like falling in love with Sherlock Holmes. Some Johnlock love to celebrate the anniversary of the day they first met. This is the first story in a series of fics - Must Be Mad, More Than I Am, Lovers of the Lost, and Of Course, Of Course. They can be read as a series, or as stand-alone stories.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,671 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 137 - Follows: 8 - Published: 1/29/2012 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
Paris, Je T'Aime reviews
When Arthur and Eames first fall in love - and it's the first time, because they fall in love so many times afterwards - they have three glorious weeks in Paris. Can be read as a one-shot or a sequel to Kiss Me, Kill Me.
Inception - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,205 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 58 - Published: 11/15/2011 - Arthur, Eames - Complete
Kiss Me, Kill Me reviews
When Eames meets Arthur, he decides that he does not like him and he never will. Well, actually, he hits on him first. And gets turned down. Not that that has anything to do with it. But of course it's hard to hate someone you really want to get on.
Inception - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 12,316 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 123 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 10/24/2011 - Published: 10/3/2011 - Eames, Arthur - Complete
Regrets and Repairs reviews
Rory and the Doctor do something they live to regret, due to an inexorable chain of events. This includes the Doctor being provocative, Rory not being able to sleep, and making tea - not in that order. Rory/Doctor mild slash/friendship, set in series 6.
Doctor Who - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,946 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 46 - Follows: 3 - Published: 6/2/2011 - 11th Doctor, Rory W. - Complete
What to Do When a Handsome Knight Asks You to Bed reviews
Lusting over a certain charming knight? Then look no further! This handbook is the definitive guide to pursuing, obtaining and enjoying your quarry. Merlin/Gwaine comedy spin-off to 'Twas the Knight Before Yuletide.
Merlin - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 1,915 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 37 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 5/27/2011 - Published: 4/6/2011 - Merlin, Gwaine - Complete
Brave New World reviews
Ripley and Call have just arrived on Earth, a Brave New World. This is the start of one way of life, and the end of another. What choices will they make about the future? Ripley/Call one-shot set after 'Alien: Resurrection'. Femmeslash, some swearing.
Aliens/Predator - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,747 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 3 - Published: 3/2/2011 - Complete
Iceskating reviews
Fitzwilliam Darcy admitted to Elizabeth Bennet that he had been childhood friends with George Wickham. Little did she know the details of their relationship, or how complicated it became... Young Darcy and Wickham, mild slash.
Pride and Prejudice - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,350 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 2/20/2011 - Published: 1/3/2011 - Complete
Twas the Knight Before Yuletide reviews
In the fortnight leading up to Yuletide, Merlin learns some important lessons about friendship, drinking, Gaius' porridge, finding a lost love, mistletoe, and most of all, love. Merlin/Gwaine, set after Series 3. Mild language and sexual references.
Merlin - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 11 - Words: 30,977 - Reviews: 66 - Favs: 188 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 1/3/2011 - Published: 1/2/2011 - Merlin, Gwaine - Complete