Author has written 10 stories for Harry Potter, and School of Rock.
Name: Chikin Wang
Type of Nerdfighting: Children's literature & quote taking nerdfighter
Occupation: Professional Pretzel Twister
Super hero alias: Pretzel Princess
Super power: saving the world from world hunger with pretzels AND preventing childhood obesity with her mad DDR skills.
Affiliated with: The Grammar Samurai, protector of the Grammar Goddess and the Grammar Falcon.
Archnemesis: The Bunny Baroness
THE QUOTE BOARD
Please note that the following were not meant to be offensive in any way or form; they were just a bunch of quotes that Chikin Wang compiled in hopes of (a) mocking the present day society and/or (b) illustrate the true goings-on of a typical American high school student.
Quote of the Week:
Feb. 17 - Feb. 23
About Hillary Clinton:
Jess: Does she scare you?
Kristian: Yeah. She definitely wears the pants in that marriage--with a tux--and a top hat
Feb. 10 - Feb. 16
Nicole: I'm gonna start a riot.
Jess: Yeah, 'coz we totally have pitchforks and...stuff.
Jess: I dunno, it's just not a riot without pitchforks.
Nicole: Um...yeah, if you're rioting in 1847.
Feb. 3 - Feb. 9
Mrs. Norris: The remark I heard this morning was, "Well it's easier than calculus," and I'm like, Well what the hell isn't?
Jan. 27 - Feb. 2
Matt Potter: My favorite dinosaur was the triceratop.
Kristian: Mine was Barney.
Jan. 20 - Jan. 26
Laurali: Kristian, I have to tell you something...
Laurali: I got into VCU
Laurali: (louder) I got into VCU.
Kristian: I could of sworn you said you got a VCR...
Jan. 13 - Jan. 19
Ashley: What was that song by...those people?
Nicole: (sarcastically) Wow, could you be any more vague?
Jan. 6 - Jan. 12
About writing essays for AP Psych:
Jess: Yeah, Mr. Denson was like, "Don't write it like an English essay," so I was like, "Write it like a Chinese essay?"
Katie: I'll write mine as a German essay.
Jess: And turn it in.
Katie: (knowledgeably) Yes, I was channeling Freud...
Dec. 16 - Dec. 22
Katie: Jess, here's a Harry Potter question for you: do dementors poop?
Jess: Well, they can mate, so i guess so...
Kristian: (imitates a dementor) Oh, yeah, I'm a dementor and I poop out souls. Hey, Marie Antoinette, get back in here (sucks in air).
Nov. 18 - Nov. 24
About the Adventures of Huckleberry Finn:
Katie: Was I the only one that was disturbed by Jim and Huck going down the river completely naked? Like a floating nudist colony?
Nov. 11 - Nov. 17
Lilly: Mom, am I a bad driver?
Lilly: Nuh-uh! I bet you were a worse driver when you started. (turns to Jess) I bet she drove the car through cornfields.
Jess: There were no cornfields.
Lilly: (without missing a beat) I bet she drove it through rice paddies.
Nov. 4 - Nov. 10
Mrs. Golden's analogy for semi-colons:
Mrs. Golden: So I drive down my court and I see that there aren't any cars around, so I come to an almost stop at the stop sign and then go. We call it a California stop.
Jake: What court?
Mrs. Golden: (slowly) I...I would never tell you that. (pauses) My court is in Kentucky. I commute everyday. I drive fast.
Andy: So, not only does she run stop signs, but she also speeds...
Oct. 28 - Nov. 3
About Hagrid's parents:
Jess: So, Hagrid's parents. How do you think...?
Katie: Well, I dunno, it'd probably be harder the other way around...unless the woman did a lot of Yoga...
May 6 - May 12
In AP Euro class the day before the exam:
Mrs. Baldwin: Don't eat a huge breakfast with loads of carbohydrates because it'll make you sleepy.
Garry: So much for that chocolate chip pancake idea, Wil...
Mrs. Baldwin: No, you can eat some, but not a lot.
Wil: Aw, man...I was gonna have a contest...
Apr. 29 - May 5
When Ashley donned her eight foot long timeline like a Miss America sash:
Katie: (sings) There she is, Miss AP Euro...There she is, your ideal...The dreams of a million nerds...
About Jess's persuasive project on prosecution of pedophiles:
Jess: I couldn't put some details into my report because it wasn't rated G.
Nicole: (whose topic was on the insanity plea of serial killers) Um, are serial killers G-rated? I don't think so.
Simon: When was the last time you saw a G-rated pornography?
Nicole: Are there G-rated pornographies?
Simon: If they are fully clothed kids holding hands. You know, inuendos.
Dec. 31 - Jan. 6
Just a typical day in 10th grade health...:
Simon: Oh my God.
Nicole: Oh my God.
Simon: OH MY BUDDHA!
Jess: I say "Oh my wand"...
Nicole: (horrified) Oh Merlin...
Jess: I don't say that 'coz people look at me funny.
Nicole: And they don't when you say "oh my wand"!
Simon: You know, "oh my wand" sounds like Obi-Wan.
Nicole and Jess: O_o''
The QUOTE BOARD has been moved to Copy and paste or just CLICK HERE.
(when you get this message, please email me at email@example.com or comment somewhere on vox.net or my xanga account--see above--or message me. because i wanna see how long it takes for people to figure this one out)