Alpha Tigress 1221
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Joined 01-03-11, id: 2685928, Profile Updated: 12-24-13
Author has written 2 stories for Kung Fu Panda, and Warriors.

My super awesome best friend Feline Scribbler drew this for my birthday.

So yea...

I WILL write at least one 1shot for each SHINee pairing

I WILL be working on a full length story based on their video Dark Mode Killer (and maybe Time To Go, too. I haven't decided yet)

I will also take requests if there's an angle or idea for a certain pairing you'd like to see done. (ex. AU Jongyu or fluffy Taekey) Just PM me with a prompt (the more you write the better) and I'll write it.

NAcha'z Ninja, out ;)

Fanfiction quiz -From Heavens-Angel96's profile

Which do you prefer? Reading fanfics, or writing them?

Both, but I've been reading a lot more as of late.

Do insulting reviews discourage you?
Well, maybe a little. I just go into rage mode, have a "nice" (yea right) conversation via PM with the person, and then move on.

What do you mainly write and read about?

Action and adventure with a bit of romance. A lot of the humor is for the Spice Life.

Are you proud of your fanfics?

The ones I make now. The ones I made before, I absolutely hate.

How long have you been on

Since January 3, 2011. Not really all that long.

Have you inspired any other writers?

Yea, but only one as far as I know.

When you are added to a person's Favorite Author's list, how do you react?

I just lean back and say to myself, "So people do care"

Would you cry if you posted a one-shot, came back the next morning, and found a thousand reviews in your mailbox?

Let's just say, the ocean would have nothin' on me.

Do you think it's possible for you to get a thousand reviews for a one-shot?

Nope. In fact, I can't write a one-shot right to be honest.

Is it regular for you to get over 10 reviews for each chapter?

No, not at all.

What was your first story on this site?

The Birth Of FuryClan, the stupid version.

What is your latest fanfic posted?

The Birth of FuryClan, the awesomer yet unfinished version.

If you compare the two, how far have you gone since you first started writing fanfics?

From stupid to awesome in a little more than a year. I'd say that's an acomplishment.

Are you a legend in your archive?

I don't even have a real archive...

10 Commandments of a Teenager

1) Thou shall not sneak out when parents are sleeping.
(why wait that long)
2) Thou shall not do drugs.
(alcohol lasts longer, not to mention being cheaper.)
3) Thou shall not steal from K-Mart.
(Walmart has a bigger selection)
4) Thou shall not be arrested for vandalism.
(destruction has a bigger effect, I can tell you all about this)
5) Thou shall not steal from your parents.
(everyone knows grandma has more money)
6) Thou shall not get into fights.
(Cat fight anyhow...just start them.)
7) Thou shall not skip class.
(just take the whole day off)
8) Thou shall not strip in class.
(Hooters pays more)
9) Thou shall not think about having sex.
(like Nike says, "just do it")
10) Thou shall not help old ladies across the street.
(just leave'm in the middle)

Mental Hospital Phone Menu:

Hello and thank you for calling The State Mental Hospital!

Please select from the following options menu:

If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.

If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.

If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5 and 6.

If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be forwarded to the Mother Ship.

If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, telephone number, date of birth, social security number, and your mother's maiden name.

If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.

If you are dyslexic, press 9696969696969696.

If you have post-traumatic stress disorder, s-l-o-w-l-y & c-a-r-e-f-u-l-l-y press 0 0 0.

If you are bipolar, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.

If you have a nervous disorder, fidget with the hatch key until a representative comes on the line.

If you have low self-esteem, please hang up; our operators are too busy to talk with you.

If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press.

If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, nothing will make you happy anyway.

If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want, stay on the line so we can trace your call.

If you are menopausal, put the gun down, hang up, turn on the fan, lie down and cry. You won't be crazy forever.

If you are blonde, don't press any buttons, you'll just mess it up.

On Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
(But, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)

On a package of pasta after the cooking instructions:
"Put on fork and eat."
(As opposed to a spoon? Or how 'bout a spork?)

On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(*puts bag in pocket*)

On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
(and that would be how?)

On some Swann frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
(But it's just a suggestion!)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
Do not turn upside down.
(Too late! you lose!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
(Are you sure? Let's experiment.)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
(But wouldn't that save more time?)

On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.
(Wonder how many accidents that avoided...-.-)

On Nytol sleep aid:
Warning: may cause drowsiness.
(One would hope!)

On artificial bacon:
"Real artificial bacon bits".
(So we don't get fake fake bacon. Oh no we get real fake bacon. Why does fake bacon even exist?!?)

On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: keep out of children.
(*slowly puts knife back in drawer*)

On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
(As opposed to... outer space?)

On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
(Now I'm curious.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: contains nuts.
(...I'm not even...)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
(someone got paid big bucks to write this one..)

On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
(Raise your hand if you've tried this.)

On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
(Oh sure, go ahead! Destroy a great childhood belief.)

Recent studies show that 92 percent of teenagers have moved onto rap. If you're part of that 92 percent and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile. (hell yea, bitches!)

Love knows no gender, age, or color. If you believe this, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you believe that preps travel in packs, copy and paste this into your profile.

Too many people are on crack. If you're not, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are aware that so many people now and days pretend to be someone they're not, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have crushes on one or more characters from the TV series, copy and paste this into your profile. (yea...that's not weird or anything...ooh look, pretty fireworks! *run away*)

So many girls pretend they're something they're not just to fit in, if you're not one of those girls copy and past this into your profile.

If you've ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you don't watch Laguna Beach, The O.C., The Hills religiously, never have, never will, and are proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you like to write, copy and paste this into your profile.

98 of the population would die if Johnny Depp said it wasn't cool to breathe. If you're one of the 2 that would be laughing your ass off, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you spend multiple hours a day reading, writing, or a combination of both, copy and paste this into your profile.

"I'm bringing sexy back..." If you never even knew sexy was gone, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this into your profile. (wtf?)

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever run into a tree, copy this to your profile!

If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile

If you have ever tripped down the stairs copy this into your profile.

If you know someone who should be run over by a bus, copy this to your profile

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vice versa copy this into your profile

If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.

If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.

If someone has ever said something to you that had nothing to do with your current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you hate those irritating mosquitoes giving you mosquito bites copy this in your profile.

If you and your friends have a nickname, title, or anything else for each other, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you have a very wide range of interests, copy and paste this into your profile.

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! if you can raed tihs, ptase tihs in yuor prfiole

Copy this and paste it on your profile if you think sarcasm is a conditioned reflex.

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.

If you ever zoned out for five consecutive minutes, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever done anything incredibly stupid for no apparent reason, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile.

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.

If you're a person who acts friendly, but has an evil mind and is planning to dominate the world, copy this to your profile.

If you have ever panicked because you can't find your glasses and then realise you're wearing them, copy this in to your profile.

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

SPLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!! If you are really random put this on your profile.

If you're easily distracted, copy and pa- OOH SHINY!

If Fanfiction is your way of escaping reality and the rest of the boring people in the world and truly "unleashing your imagination" then paste this in your profile and add your name: Emerald Princess 14, StardustFromThePlanetGallifrey, NarnianFairypirateatwilight, Storms-Are-My-Nature, ShadowRose18, arabella malfoy, mth999pop, Roxi2Star, Mrs. FizzyIngleTweakMcCormick, InFearandFaith, NAcha'z Ninja

If you think you've read over a hundred fanfictions, copy and paste this into you're profile.

If Fanfiction consumes your life (but love it!), copy and paste this into you're profile

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you think Writer's Block is evil, put this in your profile. (burn, you evil demon...burn!)

If several inanimate objects hate you copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have the most RANDOM dreams, copy this.

If you've ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you ever walked into the wrong classroom, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think that life without computers is useless then copy this to your profile.

If your friends are WEIRD (But not as weird as you) put this on your profile

If you are the kind of person that gets really excited when you get like two reviews, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever listened to someone say something and you REALLY DO listen, word for word, and when their done you go, "What did you say?", copy and paste this to your profile

If you've ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects, copy this into your profile.

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, so weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile!

If you have ever gotten so completely sidetracked in a conversation that you don't remember why you were talking in the first place, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile.

If you completely hate Nick for ending production on Danny Phantom, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are over the age of 12 and still watch cartoon network, disney channel ect., and are proud of it, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever accidentally walked into a wall, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you read your own stories or profile just for the heck of it, copy and paste this to your profile.

I like cheese. I've seen purple cows. If two gooses are geese, then why aren't two moose meese? Or when two foot are feet, why aren't two footballs feetball? Milk tastes good. Some people call me crazy, but I'm just random. If you are random and proud of it, copy this onto your profile

If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word, And you do so at random moments; copy and paste this in you're profile.

If you've ever wondered what the antifile is, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you love to draw but think your art sucks, copy and paste this into your profile.

Just because we eat animals doesn't mean we can cut them up for clothing! If you are against fur coats, clothing, boots, etc., copy this into your profile!

If you or your best friend is insane, copy this into your profile

If you have ever had a random crush on a cartoon character, copy this onto your profile

95% of teens would be crying if Justin Bieber was on a 100 ft tall building about to jump. If you are some of the 5% who brought popcorn and friends, add this to your profile.

If you have a profile, paste this on your profile.

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer.

If you copy and paste stuff into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.

The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...

"I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no fucking way Paper can beat Rock. Paper is supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? Why the hell can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating student as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that shit up in 2 seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my already clenched fist and say, oh shit, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you, you asshole."

Friends and Best Friends:

Friends: Will help me when I'm lost.
Best Friends: Will be the one messing with my compass,stealing my map and giving me bad directions.

Friends: Will help me learn to drive.
Best Friends: Will help me push the car into the lake so I can collect insurance.

Friends: Will watch my pets when I go away.
Best Friends: Won't let me go away.

Friend: Will help me up when I fall down.
Best Friend: Will point and laugh cause she tripped me.

Friend: Will go to a concert with me.
Best Friend: Will help me kidnap the band.

Friend: Ask me for my number.
Best Friend: Ask me for her number.

Friend: Hides me from the cops.
Best Friend: Is probably the reason they are after me in the first place.

Friend: Lets me make an idiot out of myself in public.
Best Friend: Is up there with me making an idiot out of herself too.

FRIENDS Lend you their umbrella.
BEST FRIENDS: Take yours and say 'RUN GIRL RUN!'

FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.
BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.

FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.
BEST FRIENDS:Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.
BEST FRIENDS:Would be sitting next to you sayin "THAT WAS FRICKING AWESOME!"

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.
BEST FRIENDS: Won't tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore.

FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.
BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.
BEST FRIENDS: Loses your crap and tells you, "My's a tissue."

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.
BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you.

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.
BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.

FRIENDS:Will confort you when the guy rejects you
BEST FRIENDS:Will go up to him and say 'its becuase your gay isn't it?'

FRIENDS: Will be there for you when he breaks up with you.
BEST FRIENDS: Will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..."

FRIENDS: Helps you up when you fall.
BEST FRIENDS: Keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, dumb ass?"

FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince.
BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you.

FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying.
BEST FRIENDS: Already have the shovel to bury the body of the person that made you cry.

FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying.

BEST FRIENDS: Will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, Loser!"

FRIENDS: Will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month.

BEST FRIENDS: Will throw you a tampon and push you in.

FRIENDS: Will help you move.

BEST FRIENDS: Will help you move the bodies.

FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough.

BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say "Girl, drink the rest of that! You know we don't waste!

FRIENDS: Will pass you a soda.

BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you.

Friends: Fade.
Best Friends: Are FOREVER.

FRIENDS: Would ignore this letter.
BEST FRIENDS:Will repost this crappp!

For my BFFs:

You are always there for me, we fight, we make-up, then we swear we will never be friends again.
But we always know we can't stay mad at eachother, we will always be friends.
But as we grow-up, we've grown apart, we haven't fought, so we can't make up, and we didn't swear we will never be friends again.
I've learn it's because we've gained different interests, but then I always get that email with a quiz about you only for me.
And it asks if we will always be best friends, and I say yes.
You're my best friends and nothing will ever change that, it may seem we are growing apart, it is just that we're growing up. I love you!

If you love your BFFs copy and paste this to your profile, but this was written by AluvsB! Remember that!





are like
apples on trees.
The best ones are
at the top of the tree.The
boys don't want to reach
for the good ones because they
are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy. So the apples at the top think
something is wrong with them, when in
reality, they're amazing. They just
have to wait for the right boy to
come along, the one who's
brave enough to
climb all
the way
to the top
of the tree

True Story

A teenage girl about 17 named Diane had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer then planned, and had to walk home alone. She hasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away.

As she walked under the tall elm trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he was waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped around her, she felt though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely.

The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley way just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she can identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man have been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they can do for her. She asked if they can ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking either side of her." Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. The God you belive in is real. Did you know that 98 of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93 of the people that read this won't repost it?


You love hoodies. (way better than skirts)
You love jeans. (also better than skirts)
Dogs are better than cats. (WOOF!)
It's hilarious when people get hurt. (i think america can agree with me on this)
You've played with/against boys on a team. (I won!)
Shopping is torture.
Sad movies suck. (I've never actually cried at a movie)
You own/ed an X-Box.
Played with Hotwheel cars as a kid.
At some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter.
You own/ed a DS, PS2 or Sega.
You used to be obsessed with Power Rangers.
You watch sports on TV. (FOOTBALL!!!!!!)
Gory movies are cool. (yea...t-that's not weird...or anything)
You go to your dad for advice.
You own like a trillion baseball caps. (eh, it's that and a whole bunch of other hats)
You like going to high school football games.
You used to/do collect football/baseball cards.
Baggy pants are cool to wear.
It's kinda weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people.
Green, black, red, blue, or silver are one of your favorite colors.
You love to go crazy and not care what people think.
Sports are fun
Talk with food in your mouth or sleep with your socks on


You wear lip gloss/chapstick.
You love to shop.
You wear eyeliner.
You wear the color pink. (but i by no means love it)
Go to your mom for advice.
You consider cheerleading a sport. (to an extent...)
You hate wearing the color black.
You like hanging out at the mall.
You like getting manicures and/or pedicures.
You like wearing jewelry.
Skirts are a big part of your wardrobe.
Shopping is one of your favorite hobbies.
You don't like the movie Star Wars.
You are/were in gymnastics/dance. (best part is, I beat 2nd degree black belts in taekwondo. COME AT ME!)
It takes you around/ more one hour to shower, get dressed, and make-up. (normally, that's not my fault)
You smile a lot more than you should. (more like laugh, but whatever)
You have more than 10 pairs of shoes.
You care about what you look like. (seriously, who doesn't?)
You like wearing dresses when you can.
You like wearing body spray/perfume.
You love the movies. (mostly either action or comedy)
Used to play with dolls as little kid. (eh, more like stuffed animals)
Like putting make-up on someone else for the joy/joke of it.Like being the star of every thing (No use in denying it xD)

Things My Mom Taught Me

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck?"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you're cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"


The two most common elements in the world are hydrogen and stupidity.

Adults are just kids with money.

God created the earth, the sky, and man. Everything else was created in China.

Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyways.

Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?

The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then tells you why it's not

What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

Some say the glass is half full, others the glass is half empty, all I want to know is who's drinking my Mountain Lion! (best soda ever, by the way)

If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving's not for you.

Money can't buy happiness. But it sure makes misery easier to live with

Take my advice, I don't use it anyway.

Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do . . . write to them?

Why is dyslexic so hard to spell?

Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game" when we're already there?

It's not strange to argue with yourself. It's only strange to argue with yourself and lose.

Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.

You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.

Wrinkled was not one of the things I wanted to be when I grew up.

Never be afraid to try new things. After all, an amateur built the arc, but professionals built the titanic!

Happiness. It made the whole dying thing pretty bearable

Never argue with an idiot. They'll just drag you down to their level and beat you with experience - Lol

There's that one quote, 'when I'm around you the sky is a different blue'. What happens when I'm around you, and the effing sky is gray?

After a year in therapy, my psychiatrist finally said to me, " isn't for everyone."

You're a good friend and I love you and all...but if we ever get chased by zombies, I'm totally tripping you.

There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.

You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it.

Boys are like slinkeys, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs.

I ran with scissors, and lived!

You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder.

They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill to many people.

When life gives you lemons, make grape juice and let the world wonder how you did it.

Flying is simple. Just throw yourself at the ground and miss.

Don’t knock on death’s door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that.

My mind works like flash and then it's gone.

Whoever said nothing's impossible, they never tried slamming a revoling door!

A loser is a window washer on the 44th floor who steps back to admire his work.

The dinosaur's extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came along and they all committed suicide.

Ever notice how parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us how to walk and talk, and then the rest of our lives telling us to sit down and shut up.

Secret admirers are stalkers with stationary

I didn't fall for you, you tripped me.

Of course I'm talking to myself, who else can I trust?

Don't follow me, I'm lost too

It's always the last place you look. Of course it is. Why would I keep looking after I've found it?

I'm sick of following my dreams, I'm just gonna ask where their going and hook up with them later

Doctors say I have multiple personalities. We disagree with that.

I'll try to be nicer if you try to be smarter.

If the world is full of crazy people, THEY'D MAKE ME THEIR LEADER.

One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh he took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions.

WARNING: Do NOT walk in my footsteps... I tend to walk into walls, and off the occasional cliff.

Have you seen my sanity? I seem to have lost it

364 days of the years kids are told not to take candy from strangers, but on Halloween it's encouraged! Why is that?

Diamonds are a girl’s best friend...because they're shaper then knives.

Being weird is like being normal, only better.

Dear Cool People: If you're so cool, why isn't there a candy named after you? Sincerely, the Nerds

I'm a bomb technician. If you see me running, try to keep up.

A wise man once said, "I don't know, go ask a woman."

You laugh because I'm different. I laugh because you are all the same.

Reality is for people who lack imagination.

Take risks, if you win you will be happy; if you lose you will be wise.

Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, and dark side, and holds the universe together.

Never doubt the power of an extremely pissed off woman.

Be insane . . . because well behaved girls never made history.

We fall for stupid boys, we make lots of dumb mistakes, we like to act stupid, talk really fast, and laugh really loud. But we teenage girls are good at 2 things: Staying Strong, and Being Ourselves.

You can’t spell 'BEAUTIFUL' without 'BE U'.

They say the world's going to end in 2012 because that's when the Mayan calander ended. Ever think that maybe they just got tired of making calanders thousands of years ahead of time?

Be the type of woman, that when you wake up in the morning, the devil thinks: "Oh, snap! She's up!"

I know who I am...your approval really isn't needed.

Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It's already tomorrow in Australia.

Life is not measured by the breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

All those who believe in telekinesis, raise my hand.

Save the Earth. It's the only planet with chocolate.

I used to be normal... until I met those freaks I call my friends.

Home is not where you live, but where they understand you.

Don't you dare tell me the sky is the limit when there are footsteps on the moon.

You say 'crazy' like it's a bad thing.

Wear your seat belt. It'll make it harder for the aliens to get you from your car.

Don't mess with something that can bleed for a week and not die.

Whatever doesn't kill me had better run pretty darn fast.

I've been given sugar. Please use this time to prepare for the end of the world.

Live like you'll die tomorrow. Because if you keep annoying me, you might.

I'm not RANDOM. You just can't think as FAST as me!

Sarcasm: Because beating people up is illegal.


1. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

2. He who laughs last thinks slowest.

3. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

4. Those that live by the sword get shot by those who don't.

5. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.

6. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90 probability you'll get it wrong.

7. If you lined up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try to pass them, five or six at a time, on a hill, in the fog.

8. If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.

9. The things that come to those who wait will be the things left by those who got there first.

10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

11. A flashlight is a case for holding dead batteries.

12. The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.

13. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well

Why America has some issues:

1. Only in America...can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

2. Only in America...are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.

3. Only in drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

4. Only in people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.

5. Only in banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

6. Only in we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

7. Only in we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

8. Only in we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

9. Only in we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'

10. Only in they have drive-up ATM's with Braille lettering.

If ya can't beat 'em, join 'em.
If ya can't join 'em, bribe 'em.
If ya can't bribe 'em, blackmail 'em.
If ya can't blackmail 'em, kill 'em.
If ya can't kill 'em, you're screwed


Stop reading this and read the fanfictions!


Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Spread Your Wings by AnimationGirl reviews
What if Shifu never adopted Tigress? What if someone with a plan came before him? What if Tigress was adopted by a certain owl? What would her future become? In a twisted version of movie's universe, Tigress will meet the warriors of the Jade Palace as her enemies, while a complicated battle for justice starts.
Kung Fu Panda - Rated: T - English - Family/Adventure - Chapters: 50 - Words: 150,363 - Reviews: 667 - Favs: 126 - Follows: 73 - Updated: 11/24/2013 - Published: 5/19/2012 - Tigress, Fenghuang - Complete
The new comers by Modelgirl97 reviews
Dave adopts a human girl. What he does not know is Lakeeyia is not a regular girl, and neither is her friends. Dave then knows that Lakeeyia and her friends are... Read to find out more. CGI version. Better than it sounds!
Alvin and the chipmunks - Rated: T - English - Family/Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 17,531 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 3/29/2013 - Published: 8/30/2010
Fatal Attraction by This-is-my-designx reviews
Katniss Everdeen, the Girl on Fire, can't work out why brutal, bloody Cato seems to hate her more than the other tributes. Is it because she recieved a higher training score than him? Or is it something else?
Hunger Games - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 19 - Words: 28,410 - Reviews: 263 - Favs: 293 - Follows: 472 - Updated: 1/8/2013 - Published: 4/1/2012 - Katniss E., Cato
Soul of the Tiger: Primordial Heritage by Culpeo46 reviews
Visited by a mysterious entity in the Dark Forest, Tigerstar discovered his fate has been pivoted around and turned upside down. Suspicious of the entity's actions, he now journeys across the terrain of the Clans once again in the hopes of seeking crucial answers. Unbeknownst to him, the case might hold more than what meets the eye. Rated T for violence and profanity.
Warriors - Rated: T - English - Mystery/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,317 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 10/16/2012 - Published: 9/7/2012 - Tigerstar
The Earthbender and the General by Miss Faber reviews
A series of Broh drabbles! The first seven belong to Broh Week 2012. Enjoy!
Legend of Korra - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 6 - Words: 2,436 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 9/17/2012 - Published: 8/7/2012 - Bolin, General Iroh
Howl by WheatleyAndrews reviews
Bolin joins the crew of Iroh's ship as the two form a committed relationship. Although Bolin satisfies all of the general's bedtime needs, Iroh's left desiring something more... controversial. Inspired by a post from the fuckyeahbroh tumblr blog. Broh, lemony/limey at the moment with more lemon later on.
Legend of Korra - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,737 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 24 - Published: 8/26/2012 - General Iroh, Bolin
Fidelity by IwasBornaRainicorn reviews
Finn and Flame Princess like each other a whole lot, but it's hard to have a healthy relationship without Finn getting second degree burns everytime they hold hands. No matter how bleak things seem to get, they're both still willing to try and work things out. ONESHOT. SET AFTER "Burning Low."
Adventure Time with Finn and Jake - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,435 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 5 - Published: 7/31/2012 - Finn, Flame Princess - Complete
Total Drama Black Forest by TheHiWaAndSockyShow reviews
Have fun with your character in TOTAL DRAMA BLACK FOREST! Join the two new hosts, Jade and Jane, in the Forest in an all-out throw down of epic proportions! No longer accepting apps.
Total Drama series - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 6 - Words: 9,410 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 7/22/2012 - Published: 6/24/2012
Memories by UmbreKino reviews
An Assassin with well kept secrets from her family. The only thing keeping her secrets from being exposed, is a member of the Organization, a broken trail of memories, and a series of disks to piece it all together. I suck at summaries. I NEED 4-5 OCs. Review!
Amazing World of Gumball - Rated: T - English - Drama/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 889 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/18/2012 - Nicole W., Gumball W.
Envious by Esmeia reviews
Jeanette, over the years, has been harboring some dangerous emotions. No longer pure and considerate, she begins to covet what her own sister has, to the point where she will do anything to strip them away. What happens when she finally gets the chance?
Alvin and the chipmunks - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Tragedy - Chapters: 4 - Words: 6,581 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 5/9/2012 - Published: 5/4/2012 - Jeanette M.
Second Best by kimikoshine reviews
"You're only second best and you always will be. He's never going to take you seriously." Rouge said. Amy immediately opened her mouth to retaliate to the loud-mouthed bat, but stopped half way.
Sonic the Hedgehog - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,205 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/19/2012 - Amy, Rouge - Complete
I want to be made into a cheerleader! by Modelgirl97 reviews
When Eleanor was younger she was at cheer camp. Now, instead of her being a cheerleader her sister Brittany is the cheerleading captain. Eleanor is now known as the fat band geek but wants to change that. Will she become the cheerleader she wants to be?
Alvin and the chipmunks - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 14,058 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 12/13/2011 - Published: 2/23/2011 - Eleanor M., Theodore S. - Complete
Take Me Away by Esmeia reviews
Jeanette was always sensitive. She had never thought ill of her beloved sisters, but she starts to feel like she's stuck in their shadows. But there is someone who sees her for so much more. Simon x Jeanette, also AxB and TxE. Lots of revamping!
Alvin and the chipmunks - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 41,524 - Reviews: 93 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 45 - Updated: 11/11/2011 - Published: 2/4/2010 - Jeanette M., Simon S.
Tea by Kippis05 reviews
Tigress' tea has always been the most important part of her morning. Little did she know that her morning routine would be so callously interrupted...
Kung Fu Panda - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,629 - Reviews: 67 - Favs: 179 - Follows: 37 - Published: 8/9/2010 - Po, Tigress - Complete
Prey to Predator by x.Dancing.Queen.x reviews
A young warrior wanders alone in the forest at night. Tail lengths away, another cat crouches in wait for his victim. One cat will dominate, and leave the other in it's wake. But the loser's remains will twist into something even more sinister. SLASH.
Warriors - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,870 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 10 - Published: 8/19/2009 - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Birth of FuryClan reviews
"The time of security is nearing its end...The Fury of the overlooked and unnoticed will rage out onto the clans. "What starts out as a time of peace soon escalates to the brewing of a storm. A new, gifted generation of warriors is born,and a wave of uncertainty and harsh sentiment is born. In the midst of it, a simple question lingers on the air, "Would you kill to prove a point?"
Warriors - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,592 - Reviews: 2 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/13/2012
Tale of the Tiger:Goddess of the Night reviews
Kitora is bent on taking the Dragon Scroll, but no one knows it. As the Jade Palace's newest student from Japan, she's still trying to find her way. Is there a power even greater than the Dragon Scroll? ON HOLD!
Kung Fu Panda - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,059 - Reviews: 3 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 8/7/2011 - Published: 7/18/2011 - Tigress