Author has written 4 stories for Harry Potter, Percy Jackson and the Olympians, and Hunger Games.
FOLLOW ME ON TUMBLR: http://www.aksiznarfnovamrak.tumblr.com
Okay! Apparently you've stumbled upon my Profile. Here's how I organize it:
1. Introduction / WHERE IN THE HECK DID I GET THE NAME FRANZISKA VON KARMA?
2. My Favorite Quotes
3. Stuff about me!
4. Characters and Ships
5. Copy and Paste stories
6. Fangirl Ramblings
7. Random stuff [doesn't really fall under any catergory]
FOR ALL WHO ARE READING THIS, PLEASE PM ME IF YOU HAVE A PROFILE AS BIG AS MINE :D I LOVE SPENDING MY TIME GOING THROUGH PEOPLE'S PROFILES AND I HATE WHEN THEY'RE SHORT!
Well. . . I got this account when I was a tiny little sixth grader wanting to express her Percy Jackson feels. I haven't updated this in so long. It's 12:17 AM, I have Florence & the Machine playing, and I have nothing better to do.
Update on my life: Again, I was an ickle sixth grader when I got this account. Now, I'm in high school, and I have joined so many fandoms since then! I'm gonna be sure to update them! I guess writing fanfiction was my first full-length story projects. But now, I've written and published a real, legit novel. PM me if you want info. You can get a hard-copy version from Amazon, or get it on a Kindle or a Nook. You will NOT find my book in bookstores.
Anyway, When you look at my username, most of you will probably think, why the name Franziska Von Karma???? This is what I'm here to tell you. Franziska Von Karma is a video game character from Ace Attorney, a game where you step into the shoes of a novice lawyer and collect evidence, cross examine witnesses, and prove to the courtroom that your client is not guilty. I KNOW IT SOUNDS BORING. GIVE IT A TRY. YOU WILL THANK ME. OMG IT IS AMAZING! I HIGHLY recommend it. Who here likes Boston Legal and Law and Order? THIS GAME IS LIKE IT, ONLY YOU GET TO PLAY IT! I know it is Law, but is AMAZING. Here, click on this link for proof! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SY_4zsfHlgY&feature=related
-SOME OF MY FAVORITE QUOTES!-
"THAT IS MAHOGANY." - Effie Trinket
"Oh, well, you need to embrace the fact of your inevitable death and know, in your heart that there is nothing I can do to help you." - Haymitch Abernathy
"It's still under the homosexual umbrella. Same laws." -My Social Studies teacher, discussing current events.
"Are we on the ground?
"No. We crashed and died and heaven's really disapointing!" -Wings, episode 40-something...
"I don't know... Maybe Joe knows." -Wings, same episode as above.
"I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it!" - My pesky big brother
"That's right. I stole the panties. But I did it for science!" -Wesley Stickler, Apollo Justice case 2
"Don't change anything...Ever." -Adrian Monk
"It's impossible to be bad at xeroxing!" -My mom
"Whenever you talk, I hear 'Punch me in the face,' but I normally take it as subtext." - John Watson
"HEY! If you're going to have a pity party, you'd better invite me!" -Godot, Trials and Tribulations case 2
"God made man, and then he said, "I can do better than that," and made woman." - Adela Rodgers St. Johns
"Shut up, Anderson, you lower the IQ of the entire street." -SH
-STUFF ABOUT ME-
Name: Franziska von Karma, you foolishly foolish foolhardy fool!
Age: Currently it is an even number.
Birthday: February 31
Religion: Do you really want to know, or do you want to flame my beliefs? I'm Christian. (Franziska, there's 30,000 branches! Which one?) Catholic. (Oh! So that means you worship Mary?) No. Do your research.
Email: People, I'm not stupid. I know you're a stalker. JUST PM ME!
Favorite Books: The Hunger Games, Percy Jackson, Harry Potter, 39 Clues, Savvy
Favorite Movies: Harry Potter, Avatar, Titanic.
Favorite TV shows: Monk, Doctor Who, and SHERLOCK.
Favorite Video Games: ACE ATTORNEY :D, Paper Mario 1&2 (Wii version STINKS), Super Monkey Ball 1
Favorite Artists: Florence and the Machine, Coldplay, Anna Ayers, Cassandra Kubinski, Ace Attorney Orchestrated Soundtrack, Sherlock sountrack
Godly Parent: Athena
Cahill Branch: Janus
House in Hogwarts: Ravenclaw
Top Ten Favorite Songs:
1. Clocks by Coldplay. I can play and sing this on the piano. It'll always be my favorite song. I think I've must've played this over 1,000 times and it's NEVER gotten old. Ever.
2. Bedroom Hymns by Florence and the Machine
3. The Weight of Love by Anna Ayers
4. War from Sherlock Season 1 Soundtrack
5. Gymnopedie No. 1 by Eric Satie
6. Sweet Sweet Boys by Anna Ayers
7. Racecar by Cassandra Kubinski
8. A Song About an Anglerfish by Hank Green
9. Tumblr the Musical by AVByte
10. Speed of Sound by Coldplay
-CHARACTERS AND SHIPS-
I have the pairing of the two characters, their most common ship name in bold, and normally a short explanation on my opinion of the ship.
Ships I support:
All time OTP: Klavier and Ema KLEMA You can tell if it's really me by asking me about my all time OTP, and it will always be this. Dang it, these two are perfect. I have my phases of shipping other ships really hard (I've had my Clato, Peetniss, Shules, and I'm in a Sherlene one right now) but in the end, this one will outshine them all.
Current OTPs: (Basically, the ones I'm shipping especially hard right now.)
Sherlock and Irene Sherlene I've recently become a Sherlockian, and it sometimes scares me how hard I ship this pairing.
Benedict Cumberbatch and Me Franziskabatch It's strange shipping myself with someone twice my age, but he's freaking gorgeous.
Other random ships I support:
Eleven and River Whatever Ship Name You Have for This MWAHAHAHA SO MUCH FOR DOCTOR/ROSE!
Katniss and Peeta Peetniss The names sounds weird, but I still LOVE THIS PAIRING! TEAM PEETA FTW!
Shawn and Jules Shules! I freaking love this pairing and I recently got into it. All the FFs I've read are crap, though. Too OOC and fluffy. TOO MUCH NACHO CHEESE!!!
Leo and Piper Leoper
Sadie and Anubis Sanubis!
Miles and Franziska Milziska
Percy and Annabeth Percabeth. I'm out of my Percabeth obbsession, people.
Carter and Zia Zarter
Frank and Hazel Frazel .
Harry and Ginny Hinny
Bromances I ship: (Note: These are simply bromances)
Sam Claflin and Josh Hutcherson Jam Hutcherflin Apparently, they developed a bromance while filming catching fire.
Lord Voldemort and Quirrell Quirrelldemort OH MY FINNICK THIS WAS THE BEST PART OF AVPM.
John and Sherlock Johnlock Notice how this is under the bromance category. I simply can't imagine their relationship being romantic, although it is a pretty epic friendship they have!
Inanimate Object Ships:
Draco and his Apple Drapple
Mycroft and his Umbrella Mybrella
Mycroft and his Cake Mycake
Ships I don't support:
John and Sherlock Johnlock I think I'm the only Sherlock fan who ships canon. (And if you're thinking, come on, Sherlene isn't canon and Sherlock's totally gay, re-watch A Scandal in Belgravia, and his pupils are dilating whenever he's around Irene. COME ON, GUYS. The tension between Irene and Sherlock is GOREGEOUSLY PERFECT.)
Franziska and Adrian Fradrian (EWWWWW Excuse me! I'm going to go PUKE now!)
Miles and Phoenix Erm, Phoenedgeworth, I guess? (I don't understand this one at all...)
Miles and Gumshoe Gumworth (*Shivers*)
Percy and Rachel Percachel :P
Percy and Luke Puke.
Thalia and Nico Nicalia (Guys, really. Nico is meant to be single and Thalia is a HUNTER!)
Katniss and Gale Kale Again, TEAM PEETA FTW!
Phoenix and Iris Phoeniris (Iris is SO desperate D:)
Pearl and Wocky Pearlocky (Guys, really. Pearl is meant to be single...)
A QUICK NOTE ABOUT MY SHIPPING HABITS:
You might notice I don't ship any homo ships and ship all the hetero ones. PLEASTE NOTE: I'm not a homophobe. People misuse that word all the time. A homophobe is somebody who literally COWERS IN FEAR at the sight of two men holding hands, and I certainly don't do that. I don't hate gay people, but I personally don't agree with gay marriage. Please don't throw a hissy fit, because I truly believe gay people are still people and they have feelings etc. . .. I KNOW. One of my best friends is gay, and we're still great buds. :)
I guess because of that, I honestly can't imagine any of my favorite fandom characters being paired together with somebody of the same gender, and I end up shipping a buttload of hetero pairs because of that. Deal with it. It is my opinion. I don't wan't to get into some huge debate about this, because that's not the point of being a fangirl. (We're here to support each other from all the feels we have.) We are all entitled to our own opinion, and you can disagree with somebody and respect their opinion. In fact, I have to respect it, because I know if I start flaming Johnlock like the Westboro Baptist Church, 90% of the Sherlock Fandom and Martin Freeman are going to hunt me down with pitchforks. C:
Here are some of my absolute favorite characters:
PEEEETTTTAAAAAAA :D I got angry at some girls today because they hadn't read THG and didn't know who Peeta is.
Clove :D (DISTRICT 2 BUDDIES, UNITE! YEAH CHOIR BUDDY!)
Octavian _ I like him!
Here are some of my least favorite characters:
Kristoph Gavin (He's SUCH a son of a buisness! UGH I HATE HIM!)
Dahlia Hawthorne (Same reason as above. SHE'S SUCH A LITTLE DEVIL!)
Damon Gant (Anyone swimming? XD)
Vera Misham (COME ON GUYS! It's HER fault Phoenix got disbarred!)
-QUIZZES AND POLLS-
Pick Ten Random Characters. (I used to have an Ace Attorney one, but I've updated it to a Sherlock one!)
- Mycroft's Umbrella
- Mrs. Hudson
What would you do if Number 1 woke you up in the middle of the night?
I honestly don’t know.
Number 3 walked into the bathroom while you're showering?
* ASDFGHJKL *FEELS* HAI THERE.
Number 4 announced he/she's going to marry 9 tomorrow?
Talk about plot twist.
Number 5 cooked you dinner?
It better be really classy and not poisoned.
Number 6 was lying next to you on the beach, sleeping?
This is too bizzare to even think about.
Number 7 suddenly confessed to be part of your family?
NO THAT MEANS I’M RELATED TO ANDERSON. NOOOOO. Anderson is an idiot and that cannot be helped.
Number 8 got into the hospital somehow?
Yeah, he’s working in the morgue at Bart’s a lot.
Number 9 made fun of your friends?
I THOUGHT BETTER OF YOU, JOHN WATSON.
Number 10 ignored you all the time?
Well, he IS Mycroft.
Two serial killers are hunting you down. What will 1 do?
Give the autopsy report for their eventual hypothetical dead bodies. C:
You're on a vacation with 2 and manage to break your leg. What does 2 do?
Continues being an umbrella.
It's your birthday. What does 3 get you?
Nothing. Apparently, I’m related to Anderson, and that means I’m an idiot.
You're stuck in a house that's on fire. What does 4 do?
Well, it’s only hypothetically on fire, but then the CIA comes in and makes Sherlock open the safe. VATICAN CAMEOS.
You're about to do something that'll make you feel extremely embarrassed. What will 5 do?
Probably remind me that it’ll be okay because we’re still STAYIN ALIVE. STAYIN ALIVE. HA HA HA HA. STAYIN ALIVE. STAYIN ALIVE.
You're about to marry number 10. What's 1's reaction:
I’m not exactly sure I’d marry 10 in the first place.
You got dumped by someone. How will 7 cheer you up?
Anderson, shut up. You lower the IQ of the entire street.
You compete in a tournament. How does 9 support you?
Um, he’ll post about it on the blog to gain support.
You can't stop laughing. What will 10 do?
Tell me to “Act like a grownup for once.” Unfortunately, I’ve forgotten my pants.
Number 1 is all you've ever dreamed of. Why?
Because I’m known for my weird dreams.
Number 2 tells you about his/her deeply hidden love for number 10.
YES. I TOLD YOU IT’S CANON.
You're dating 3 and he/she introduces you to her parents. Would you get along?
:D:D:D I’m DATING THREE!!!! YAYAY
Will number 5 and 6 ever kiss?
I SURE HOPE NOT.
Number 4 appears to be a player, breaking many hearts. What do you do?
Well, that MAY OR MAY NOT BE HER JOB.
You had a haircut and 7 can't stop looking at you. What goes on in your mind?
OH, COME ON. Anderson’s hair is a JOKE.
Number 8 thinks he/she’ll never get a girl/boyfriend. What will you tell him/her?
Well, you’re married, aren’t you?
Number 9 is too shy to face you and confesses their love by sending an email. Now what?
Sorry, John, I’m already going out with Sherlock.
You spot 10 kissing 1. How do you react?
Hmmm . . . I guess I have no opinion on this ship. I am neutral.
You notice that 3 and 4 have been inside that hotel room for MORE than a few hours. What are you thinking?
THEY MUST BE HAVING DINNER. TOOK YOUR TIME. xD *le dying.*
Could 1 and 6 be soul mates?
Not even sure that they’ve even met!
Would 2 trust 5?
2 is an umbrella.
Number 4 is bored and pokes 10. What happens after that?
Ten says, “WAIT A SECOND, YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO HAVE BEEN BEHEADED!”
5 and 1 are forced to go back to school together. What study will they pick?
They would pick, “How to Convince an Employee at St. Bart’s That You’re not Really Sherlock’s Worst Enemy.”
If 6 and 3 cooked dinner what would they make?
If we’re using the Scandal in Belgravia definition of “having dinner”, they would make a child.
7 and 9 apply for a job. What job?
How about working alongside Sherlock Holmes in murder investigations?
8 gives 5 a haircut. Is that okay?
8: Well, it looks great!
5: Are you lying to me? Because if you are, I swear . . . I will S K I N you.
9 sketches what 6's perfect girl/boyfriend should look like; will 6 be happy?
Sure . . . ? I don’t know.
10 and 9 are blushing while they talk. What is their conversation about?
“We’re such idiots. Sherlock really did fake his death.”
1 accidentally kicked 10?
Again, “Can you please act like grownups just for once?
2 sent a message to his/her Bf/Gf but 9 got it. What would happen?
That’s not a mistake . . . 2 sent it to the right person.
5 and 6 did a workout together?
MY EYES . . . 0_o
6 noticed he/she wasn't invited to your birthday?
I’m not going to be that idiot who doesn’t invite MRS. HUDSON!
7 won the lottery?
Never trust an idiot with money.
8 had quite a big secret?
Well, 8, I have a secret for you too: SHERLOCK ISN’T REALLY DEAD. _
9 became a singer?
The thought of this literally made me laugh out loud.
10 got a daughter?
She would be named Umbrella Jr.!
What would 1 think of 2?
:P I don’t know.
How would 3 greet 4?
“No, I’m not hungry today.”
What would 4 envy about 5?
4 is too classy for 5.
What dream would 5 have about 6?
This gives me strange mental images.
What do 6 and 7 have in common?
Um, they both know Sherlock? I can’t think of a decent one.
What would make 7 angry at 8?
8 having 3 help in an investigation before he lets 9.
Where would 8 meet 9?
At a crime scene.
What would 9 never dare to tell 10?
9 would certainly never keep tabs on 3 for 10. That has already been established.
What would make 10 scared of 1?
I don’t know, maybe if she teamed up with 5 or something.
Is 3 Gay?
*Silently weeps* No. *cowers in a corner* please don’t maim me, Johnlock shippers.
How do you feel right now?
Wow, these were all random, and I got some pretty funny questions!
1. Do you remember the episode/chapter/scene you first started shipping 6?
I used to ship Jasper, but then my best friend converted me. :)
2. Have you ever read a fanfiction about 2?
Actually, I haven’t . . . I still ship it!
3. Has a picture of 4 ever been your screen saver/profile picture/tumblr?
4. If 7 were suddenly to break up today, what would be your reaction?
THAT IS MY ALL TIME OTP. IT IS NOT EVEN CANON, YET WHENEVER I READ A FIC WHERE THEY BREAK UP, I HAVE A HEART ATTACK.
5. Why is 1 so important?
IT IS ON MY LIST OF ALL TIME OTPS. ASDFGHJKLASDFGHJKL FEEEELLLSSS.
6. Is 9 a funny or serious ship?
Serious[ly they're not siblings.]
7. Out of all the ships, which one has the best chemistry?
SHERLOCK AND IRENE. A:LSKDFJ:LKJTW:EHDS: YES.
8. Out of all the ships listed, which ship has the strongest bond?
I think Gus and Hazel. They have the common denominator of cancer, because of that, they are really close.
9. How many time have you read/watched 10’s fandom?
Too many to count.
10. Which ship has lasted the longer?
MonkxTrudy. They’ve been going out since the early 90s, I think . . .
11. How many times, if ever, has 6 broken up?
Unfortunately, 6 isn’t canon. So never.
12. If the world was suddenly thrust into a zombie apocalypse, which ship would make it out alive, 2 or 8?
2 Definitely. They literally went to hell and [hopefully will come] back!
13. Did 7 ever have to hide their relationship for any reason?
Yeah, because Klavier is Ema’s boss.
14. Is 4 still together?
I haven’t followed Psych for a while . . . Something tells me no.
15. Is 10 canon?
16. If all 10 ships were put into a couple’s Hunger Games, which couple would win?
xD KATNISS AND PEETA WOULD. LOLOLOL . . . You know what, never mind. Sherlock and Irene. Those two would fake their deaths until there was only Katniss and Peeta left, and then they'd outsmart them somehow.
17. Has anyone ever tried to sabotage 5’s relationship?
Two words: Martin Freeman.
18. Which ship would you defend to the death and beyond?
KlavierxEma and SherlockxIrene! My top two OTPs!
19. Do you spend hours a day going through 3’s tumblr page?
I go through the creator of 3’s tumblr page ._.
20. If an evil witch descended from the sky and told you that you had to pick one of the 10 ships to break up forever or else she’d break them ALL up, who would you pick?
I guess I ship SadiexAnubis the least hard. I’d be okay if they broke up.
YOU KNOW WHEN YOU'RE AN ACE ATTORNEY FAN WHEN:
1. You buy airplaine tickets to Japan. You go kick CAPCOM's but if they don't release GK2 or PW vs PL in America/Europe!
2. You ask the people at the grocery store if they stock Snackoos
3. You search youtube trying to find if there's really a band called The Gavinners
4. You randomly yell "OBJECTION!" "HOLD IT!" "TAKE THAT!" "GOTCHA" and "EUREKA!"
5. You lecture people who don't know what Ace Attorney is on how epicly amazing it is.
6. You try and play Mental Chess with people. (I ususally fail D:)
7. When you buy airplaine tickets, you try and search for iFLY tickets.
8. You understand when your fellow Ace Attorney nerds say "GS, AA, JFA, TT/T&T, AJ, GK/ME:AAI KG-8, DL-6, SL-9"
10. You pretend to whip people when you're angry at them. (I DO!!!!OOO OO! ME! ME! ME! ME!)
11. You Can spell its Japanese name (Gyakuten Saiban).
12. You Know that Phoenix's Japanese name is Naruhodo Ryuiichi, Maya's is Mayoi Ayasato, and Edgeworth's is Mitsurugi Reiji. (You get bonus points for any others.)
13. You Have actually told someone that your favorite band is the Gavinners. (I have. My friend Ian was like "Who's the Gavinners? I bet their songs suck" and I was like "GUILTY... AS CHARGED!" No one except for me got the joke)
14. You Have a potted plant in your room called "Charley".
15. You Also have a potted cactus called "Billy."
16. You Refer to your car as your steel steed.
17. Or you refer your motorcycle as your hog.
18. Your ringtone is the Steel Samurai theme song.
19. You Believe that the jury has no say in the verdict, even if they collectively chant "GUILTY! GUILTY! GUILTY!" (See case 2-4.)
20. You Learn the Blue Badger dance.
21. You Think old ladies should wear space suits.
22. You use "OBJECTION!" as part of your everyday vocabulary.
23. You suddenly can't help watching shows like "Boston Legal" and "Law and Order".
24. You believe all judges are gullible.
25. You call all monkeys "Money", which really confuses your family when you go to the zoo.
26. You think it's normal for a 24-year-old man to have gray hair.
27. You believe that prosecutors have the free time to become rock stars.
28. You have a favorite pairing(s), which you defend viciously like the rabid fangirl/boy that you are. (KLEMA AND MILZISKA!)
29. You have actually drawn out a diagram of a murder to explain it to a friend.
30. You drink coffee. Lots and lots and lots of coffee, and all of it black.
31. You find yourself calling your friends "pal" or "kitten".
32. You have looked for Luminol on ebay.
33. You watch the kid's show "Go, Diego, Go!" just to laugh hysterically as you imagine the real Diego swinging on vines.
34. You say, "Witness, you've had a long day. Shut your pie-hole." (a la Manfred Von Karma) instead of "Shut up."
35. You spend at least an hour spiking your hair every morning. (I'm a girl...)
36. You like amuse yourself by seeing if you can use fool more times in one sentence than Franziska Von Karma. (You foolishly foolish foolhardy fool who foolishly dreams of foolishly foolish foolhardy dreams that a foolishly foolish foolhardy fool would foolishly dream! Of course I can!)
37. You are extremely suspicious of bellboys, and always look to see if they're wearing black leather gloves.
38. You actually thought about how Edgeworth would look carrying that enormous stuffed bear in case 2-4. (Farewell, My Turnabout)
39. You couldn't stop laughing for half an hour after picturing Edgeworth carrying that enormous stuffed bear.
40. You always take the stairs instead of elevators.
41. You think cravats are either a) handsome (if you like Edgeworth); or b) hilarious (if you dislike Edgeworth).
42. You really, really wish he was real, just so you could write PINK in huge letters on the back of his suit jacket. C'mon. It's totally pink.
42. You actually responded out loud when he said, "…D-do I really inspire this sort of frothing desire from the female masses?" in T&T.
43. Your favorite comeback to the elderly's complaints about your clothing is, "You really should come with a supply of cheese to match your vintage whine!" ...or, at least you think it.
44. You never, under ANY circumstances, wear nail polish AND bite your nails. Who knows if Kristoph Gavin poisoned it or not?
45. You have a mild (yet healthy) fear of being murdered by an acrobat at the circus. However, you are no longer afraid of clowns and address them all as "Moe".
46. You eat instant noodles whenever you can out of sympathy for Gumshoe.
47. You make paper dolls of all the characters and re-enact certain scenes.
48. You plan to give your child a strangely spelled name like "Maggey Byrde" in case it helps them if they are accused of murder, see case 2-1.
49. You're afraid of swimming. Hey, you never know where Damon Gant will appear.
50. You begin to feel a lot warmer toward hobos, especially ones wearing blue beanies.
51. You steal someone's lunch money to inspire them to become a lawyer. They'll thank you someday.
52. You wonder if all rockstars have a secret daytime job. Say, as a prosecuting attorney.
53. You rant to your friends for hours about Von Karma, Engarde, etc. (They've learned to live with it :)
54. You have a really weird obsession and liking for everything having to do with Germany. (Anyone notice half the prosecutors have something to do with Germany? Franzy, Edgey, Manny, KLAVIER!)
55. You think a good going-away gift is a whip.
56. You think pink-colored glasses will help you get a 97 on your science test.
57. You know that 97 is the score Ema bragged about in case 1-5.
58. When someone finds you out, you just snap- bite your hat like Ini, shatter your glasses like Adrian or best of all slam your head Von Karma-style.
59. You start referring to your school ID as a badge.
60. You present your badge to anyone you meet with a flourish and wait for their reaction.
61. You can't figure out the difference between a ladder and a step-ladder, and are proud of it.
62. You wish you had witty name like Winston Payne or Dick Gumshoe.
63. You get in trouble for pointing dramatically at your teacher and yelling "OBJECTION!" whenever they slip up.
64. You have sudden, inexplicable cravings for burgers.
65. You have sculpted your own "The Thinker" and made it into a clock.
66. You call hot dogs "Samurai Dogs".
67. You are always just a little bit afraid to open the trunk of your car, especially if you own a flashy red sports car.
68. You laugh hysterically when you see a sign for "Apollo's Hair Salon"…and then debate about entering and asking for the Herr Forehead style.
69. You can relate any song that comes on the radio to one of the characters, cases, or pairings.
70. You copy and paste this into your profile.
YOU KNOW YOU'RE A SHERLOCK FAN WHEN:
1. You begin every game of Cluedo shouting, "The Game, Mrs. Hudson, is on!"
2. Every time you meet somebody you try and make clever deductions about them, but fail miserably.
3. You check the identity of every driver in every taxi you use. Even then, you remain suspicious.
4. You use everybody's phone but your own.
5. You're scared of hospital rooftops.
6. You turn up your collar to look cool.
7. The lack of intelligence among your peers constantly disappoints you.
8. Empty swimming pools make you very nervous.
9. You don't trust people who have Stayin' Alive as their ringtone.
10. The mere mention of the word "Reichenbach" is enough to make you adopt the fetal position and cry.
11. When you catch wind that your worst enemy is approaching, the first thing you do is put on the kettle and make them a cup of tea.
12. You are suspicious at anybody who writes you an IOU.
13. Whenever somebody opens a safe, you dive to the floor shouting, "VATICAN CAMEOS!"
14. You find yourself twirling your umbrella and feeling mysterious.
15. When you're bored, you get strong urges to shout at people and shoot holes in the wall.
16. You always carry a copy of London A-Z, in case you need to decipher random graffiti.
17. You never use the self-check-out machines at groceries, for fear that you might have a row with it.
18. You constantly tell people off for seeing but not observing.
19. The password to your phone is "SHER."
20. You know it's not a deerstalker, it's a sort of death Frisbee.
21. You will name your child Hamish after John Hamish Watson.
22. When somebody asks you out for dinner, you are suspicious as to what they really want.
23. You have the sudden urge to take up the violin.
24. You sign off all texts with your initials.
25. You obviously must be near a crime scene if you see a pink suitcase somewhere.
26. You know how to properly diss somebody. "Shut up, (Insert name here) , you lower the IQ of the entire street."
27. Yellow spray paint makes you suspicious.
28. Scarves are completely manly. No doubt about it.
29. You have a skull named Billy.
30. It is perfectly normal to have random body parts in your fridge. Come on, it's for an experiment.
31. People with tattoos on their heels must obviously be apart of a smuggling ring.
32. If somebody is hallucinating, it's either in the sugar, or we're all just on fumes.
33. To keep tabs on your siblings, you decide to install surveillance cameras in their flats.
34. It's obvious that Iron Man saved Sherlock, because Sherlocks save each other.
35. You copy and paste this into your profile.
A NOTE ABOUT "FEELS"
Today in Health class, (Which, by the way, is the most boring class I have) I actually learned something. I always wondered why fangirls experience "feels". Come on, you know what I'm talking about. That cocktail of adrenaline, happiness, and sadness rushing through your veins whenever you see a GIF of your OTP or read a depressing headcanon. It just feels so real, like you're actually experiencing these emotions with in your actualy life. Well, I learned that "The brain cannot distinguish the feelings between something real and a hypothetical vividly stimulating situation." In other words, we're not as crazy as normal people think we are. The feels are real, because our silly little brains can't tell the difference between that cute scene between our OTPs and what it's like to actually be in love and experience what happened ourselves.
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual labels on consumer goods:
On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. ( that's the only time I have to work on my hair)
On a bag of Fritos! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)?
On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how?...)
On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion:- Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion).
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought?...)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?)
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and.. .I'm taking this because?...)
On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?)
On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)
On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands." (...was there a lot of this happening somewhere)
On a hair straightener: "Do not use in water." (Yes, because I always straighten my hair when I'm taking a bath.)
Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity copy and paste this into your profile! XD
Slang you need to know to survive on fanfiction.net:
OOC. It stands for "Out of Character" and it's where a character isn't like how they are in the book/game/movie or whatever. For example, if you found a PJO fic where Luke was nice, he'd be OOC!
OC. It stands for "Original Character" where you make up your own character and use it in a fanfiction with canon characters.
Canon (Fill in the blank) That means that it's in the book/movie/game or whatever. For example, Percabeth is a canon pairing :)
Mary-Sue. Mary-Sue is the character who has everything perfect for them. While they're not saving the day, they can be found talking with canon characters as if they were really in the book, standing ahead of the mean person, and having everything generally perfect for them.
One-Shot It's a story that's about 1,000-2,000 words.
Two-Shot It's 2 one-shots linked together
OKAY ON THAT HAPPY NOTE:
I WOULD LOVE IT IF YOU GUYS READ AND REVEIWED MY STORIES! :D