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Poll: Who do you think is going to win the Prank War? Vote Now!
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Joined 03-13-11, id: 2789361, Profile Updated: 12-20-12
Author has written 3 stories for Harry Potter.

-formerly sweet-potterxx-

Hi, this is potterride and Bittersweet x's joint profile! We wish you a warm welcome from Hogwarts. :) We hope you enjoy our profile, which is currently undergoing some renovation. Hopefully it will be better next time you come, for now, enjoy our quotes.

I didn't create this but it's COMPLETELY AWESOME (and very true):

You say Twilight
I say Harry Potter
You say vampires
I say wizards
You say Jacob Black
I say Sirius Black
you say Team Edward
I say Team Potter
You say Robert Pattison
I'll say "is Cedric Diggory"
You think Bella and Edward are the perfect dream couple?
I think that's James and Lily
You say Edward

I'll say Harry, now STUPEFY!

some more funniness and jokes now?

okay, so this is a pun! Maximum Ride pun ppl: (potterride came up with this)

Gazzy: That was an amazin' bomb, Iggy!

Iggy: Yea, but what should be call it?

Gazzy: You created it and all, you name it.

Iggy: I'm not very good with creativity...


Gazzy: Okay, so you built it at night,

Iggy: Hmmm

Gazzy: Your name is Iggy...

Iggy: No freakin duh

Gazzy: NIGHT-IG?

Iggy: No, dude, that sounds weird going around at night calling the bomb 'Hey, Gaz, give me the Night-Ig!'

Gazzy: Yeah..

-thinks -

Gazzy: I GOT IT! IGNITE!!!!!

puns are freaking amazing!!!!!!!


If you are a member of the Harry Potter Craziness that It might be Unhealthy for You Club --then copy and paste this onto your profile

If you have never kicked a baby and will promise not to--copy and paste this onto your profile

If you love ducks named Tom--copy and paste onto to profile

If you copy and pasted something before--copy and paste this onto profile

If the impossible is really the possible for you, and this possible is the impossible, and you didn't understand this--copy and paste into profile

If you love FANG that you wake up everyday looking at him--copy and paste into profile. (from bittersweet x: potterride did this, just sayin'. I'M NOT THAT CRAZY. well i am but i don't wake up looking at FANG, dangit!)

If Fred and George rock--just copy and paste this into your profile, Fred and George do rock

I'm only doing this for Bittersweet x, if Sirius is without a doubt awesome-- copy and paste this into your profile

If you had a dream that you were born--copy and paste this into your profile

If you think that "anyhoo" is a word--copy and paste this into your profile (potterride)

If you don't think that "anyhoo" is a word--copy and paste this into your profile (bittersweet x)

If you believe in FAX (FangMax)--copy and paste this into your profile

If bittersweet x is awesomer than potterride--copy and paste this onto your profile

If potterride is awesomer than bittersweet x-- copy and paste this onto your profile

If you love the word "IF"-- copy and paste this onto your profile

If you plan to help save the Earth--copy and paste this onto your profile

If you laughed or smiled today--copy and paste this onto your profile

The Row of Smiles:

whoever invented the smiley face, we need to give you a BIG thanks :)


"Ducks are not communists!" - Bittersweet x

"Fang is MINE." - Potterride

"Your face's MOM." -Potterride

"Stop smirking!" - Bittersweet x

"BLUE BUNNNNNNY!" - Potterride

"And they were NEVER seen AGAIN!" - Potterride & Bittersweet x

"That's a Mary Sue name." - Bittersweet x, on the name Carson Catherine Epic

"Potterride, you cannot be a squirrel when you grow up."
"WHY? There's no LAW against it!" - Bittersweet x and Potterride

"I WROTE the CONSTITUTION!" - Bittersweet x (that was a lie, by the way. So don't get mad if you actually wrote the Constitution, dude.)

"God. We have the weirdest conversations.." -Potterride


"My wedding is in two hours (note-- I am a teenager) -- Potterride

"Aw...Aww...(wait for it) AWWWWWWWWWWWWW-- (and there it is)-- Potterride awing (reading fax) and bittersweet x in the ()

"My toilet isn't working."--Potterride
"Why did you tell me that?" --Bittersweet x (continuation of this problem-scroll down!)

"I see the situation." --Bittersweet x

"Trees are spatulas in disguise." --Bittersweet x

"I'm gonna scoot ALL AROUND TOWN!!!" --Bittersweet x

"The difference between you and me child, is that you actually give a dang!" --Bittersweet x

"You're not a pirate." --potterride

"You sound like Voldemort on drugs." --potterride (don't ask)

"Wait! What?! Since when do you have a life?" Bittersweet x

"I'm kissing a book that has Fang on it. Go away." -potterride

"My leg is bleeding, I must fix my leg." --Bittersweet x

"I'm pretty sure deer eat corn." --Bittersweet x

"If you can marry Fang, then I can get eaten by a baby." -Bittersweet x (just don't ask..)

"You brought a sheep into your room?" -Bittersweet x (don't ask again)

"I bumped my foot against the phone." - Bittersweet x

"Get a banana. Bananas always help." -potterride

"God, woman you eat fast," --potterride

"Strokes chin thoughtfully," --potterride

-insert Bittersweet x rambling on about the love of Eowyn and Faramir-
-potterride doing her best to ignore her blabbering-

"Agh! Why am I under my bed?" -Bittersweet x under her bed.

"I'm trying to bribe my computer." --Bittersweet x

"There is a woman dressed as a bird in a tree." --potterride

"That sounds so weird out of context,"
" Everything we say sounds weird out of context, even the things that are in context are out of context!" --potterride and Bittersweet x

(Continuation on toilet problem) "I GOT MY TOILET FIXED!"
"How exciting!" -potterride and Bittersweet x

"I can't swim."
"Don't ask me to teach you, I would probably drown you--I'm a lousy teacher like that (not that I hate you)." -Bittersweet x and potterride

"Are you yelling at your computer?"
"No, I'm yelling at my Ipod, don't be silly." -potterride and Bittersweet x (Bittersweet x was really yelling at her Ipod)

"Why am I yelling at my curtains?" -guess who--who always yells at things?

"Brb, gotta throw away this banana peel." -Bittersweet x

"The elephant has nothing to do with the hearing." -Bittersweet x

"Are you in Mordor?"
"No, why would I be in Mordor?"
"I don't know, you sound like you're in Mordor!" -potterride and Bittersweet x

"Why is Fang (from Maximum Ride) in my window?"
"I don't...know?" -Bittersweet x and potterride

"Go eat a strawberry."
"I think we have just finished them." -Bittersweet x and potterride

Bittersweet x: "We always insult each other. By the way you have ugly feet."
potterride: "You have bony toes (disclaimer Maximum Ride)."

{insert potterride singing Harry Potter in 99 Seconds}

"My tongue is being stupid; I can't roll it." -Bittersweet x

"Man, potterride, the universe is ours, all we need is more sugar." -Bittersweet x

"OMG BED SHEETS!" - potterride

"Why are you dancing with my bag, potterride?" - Bittersweet x

"How can clothing be dangerous..well, maybe if there's a really pointy hat.." -Bittersweet x

"OH MY GOSH, A KID WEARING A BOX!!" -potterride (There actually was a kid wearing a box! We took a picture of him!)

potterride: "You know who I love?"
Bittersweet x: "Fred, George, Fang, Frodo, Henry Schoonmaker, Teddy Cutting..."
potterride: "...Seamus Finnigan..."

"I'm eating a chocolate taco." -potterride (and it tasted delicious)

potterride: "You don't have a flower, you have Mot Notlef."
Bittersweet x: "...Are you feeling alright?"
potterride: "YOUR PET ROCK! MOT NOTLEF!"
Bittersweet x: "I TOTALLY FORGOT ABOUT HIM!" (note: Bittersweet x doesn't actually have a pet rock named Mot Notlef. Oh, and unscramble Mot Notlef to find out what the real name is, backwards)

Bittersweet x: "I was gonna check the mail, but then there was an earthquake, and kinda got delayed a bit! Just a bit, though."
potterride: "Oh."

"There is no invisible clown in your room, potterride." Bittersweet x

potterride: "We are gonna own health class!"
Bittersweet x : "It's a strange thing to own, but I suppose we are owning something, nonetheless."

potterride: "Are you in Gondor?"
Bittersweet x: "No! I'm not in Gondor or in Mordor!"
potterride: "Tee hee, if you put Mordor and Gondor together, it becomes Gordor."
Bittersweet x: - shakes head -

Bittersweet x: "So who's your science teacher?"
potterride: -science teacher's name is omitted for privacy and so he doesn't sue us-
Bittersweet x: "Oh. Is he a goat?" (Note: The name was not remotely goat-like.)
potterride: "No..."
Bittersweet x: "Are you sure?"
potterride: "Well, he is short, and has a weird beard...OMG MY SCIENCE TEACHER IS A GOAT!"
Bittersweet x: "I knew it!"

"I made a vampire pig." -potterride (it was a project, I SWEAR!)

"I haven't had a wedding in a while." -potterride
"Good. You're improving." -Bittersweet x

"So, who was debating?
"People. Not ducks, though, because ducks.."
"Yeah, I know. Ducks can't really talk." -Potterride and Bittersweet x

"STUPID JAMES PATTERSON!" -Bittersweet x. Numerous times.
"Don't say that on our profile!" - Potterride
"Too late." -Bittersweet x

"Your lunchbox is named Jim."
"Jim. And he is going to eat me one day."
"Oh. Okay." -BIttersweet x & Potterride

"My life isn't sad! I love my Friday nights, sitting home, watching charleissocoollike reruns.."
"What is your life!?" - Potterride and Bittersweet x

Bittersweet x: "If Max and Dylan end up together, I will kill a man."
Potterride: "I will promptly throw the book out the window, summon a volcano, throw the book inside, and then the molten rock will become the book, and the book will become an IGNEOUS ROCK."
Bittersweet x: "And we will call the rock, the book of shame."
Potterride: "The rock of shame."
Bittersweet x: "The book-rock! The bock!"

Potterride: "Sometimes I contemplate how we're friends when I'm the sane one."
Bittersweet x: "You're not the sane one."
Potterride: "Heck yeah."
Bittersweet x: "You're the weird one."

Bittersweet to potterride: "Only you can confuse Batman with Faeries!"

potterride: "I've accepted that Charlie McDonnell and I are not going to get married or date."
Bittersweet x: "Yes, see? Now that's healthy. You're improving."
potterride: "However, Oliver Phelps will propose to me one day. I'm still waiting for him."
Bittersweet x: "OKAY, NOW THAT'S NOT HEALTHY. - disappointed sigh -"

Bittersweet x: "There is a pony-tail holder on my roof."
potterride: "And how did it get there?"

potterride: "I buy all my socks from K-Mart."
Bittersweet x: "I buy them all from Walmart!"

Bittersweet x: "Aw, man, it's only pretending to rain."
-one month later-
Bittersweet x: "Is it raining?"
Potterride: "It's pretending to rain. Again."
-one week later-
Bittersweet x: "Why is it ALWAYS pretending to rain!?"

Potterride: "Gonna go watch the news..IN SPANISH!"

Bittersweet x to potterride: "Are you just looking at pictures of random actors on the internet?"

potterride: "A rhino is not stabbing me."

potterride: - rambles on about Josh Hutcherson's jawline -

Potterride: "Are you in love?"
Bittersweet x: "In love with a fictional guy from your mind? Of course I am."

"Did I just compare my brother to Igor Karkaroffe?" -potterride

"I guess the lizards were Russian." -Bittersweet x

"Have friends, they said! They'll be sane, they said!" -Bittersweet x

"While you were lecturing me on science, I was busy writing a FredHermione." -Bittersweet x, who does not in fact ship FredHermione, so she discovered.

The Game, just in general.

"Do you think Daniel Radcliffe has a pink private jet?" - potterride

Bittersweet x: "Your face."
Potterride: "That's not a good comeback!"
Bittersweet x: "...Your FACE isn't a good comeback!"

Bittersweet x: "So I think I saw Dan Bergstein at an ice cream shop last week."
Potterride: "..."
Bittersweet x: "..."
Potterride: "How has this not come up!?"

- Bittersweet x points to potterride, then to herself -
Potterride: "What are you saying?"
Bittersweet x: "Prank story!"
Potterride: "That makes sense."

"Hey! Get off my lawn you crazy woman!" - Potterride, to some random woman

"Argh! Hang on. Hello?"
"ARGH! Hang on..hello?"
"WHY ARE YOU STILL ON SPEAKERPHONE?!" - Bittersweet x battling with her phone

"Go on our profile."
"Argh, you're such a bully! I am going to report you!"
"To who?"
"The POLICE!" - Bittersweet x and Potterride

"Did you even watch The Hunger Games? Or did you watch the guys in it?" - Bittersweet x
"..Um." - Potterride

Bittersweet x: "..And I was like, oh no, I sound like HER!"
Potterride: "Am I really that bad?"
Bittersweet x: "You are TERRIBLE."

"This story, I wrote - I wrote this story - I said that backwards.." - Bittersweet x

Potterride: "You know how it is."
Bittersweet x: "Actually I don't, I just sort of pretend I do."

"If the world was full of Oliver Phelps, I would marry the whole world." - potterride

"I will CRACK that goat! Muahahhaha!" - Bittersweet x

Potterride: -drags- "It's not my fault, you're so draggable!"

Bittersweet x: - uses word attorney in sentence -
Potterride: "A TORN KNEE?!"

"What context were we having a conversation that I was explaining to you that I exist?" -Bittersweet x

"I swear refrigerators have cloaking devices." - Bittersweet x

Bittersweet x: [On May 1st] "Oh my gosh, how is it May?! It was only April like, yesterday! ..Oh wait."

"I was thinking of getting him a shark tank. Do you know where I could get a shark tank?"
"Try the Shark Tank Shop on Route 1." - Potterride & Bittersweet x

"If we're insane, at least we're happily insane!" - Bittersweet x

"I have Harry Potter toothpaste." - Potterride

"You're a bunny in a pot." - Potterride

"I have never actually felt the urge to crawl into a corner and smile." - Bittersweet x

"Imagine if we went to a tea party and they served us teacups with air in them!" - Bittersweet x

Bittersweet x: "Why aren't I friends with -insert name here-? She's sane."
Potterride: "She can't fly. I can fly."

"No no no no. You're not my favorite, I hate you." -Bittersweet x

Potterride: "Oh look a prairie dog."
Bittersweet x: "A prairie dog? Here?"
Potterride: "No it's actually a squirrel."

Potterride: "If you don't stop spoiling Doctor Who for me, I'm going to hang up."
Bittersweet x: - continues spoiling..into silence -
-a few minutes later-
Bittersweet x: "You ACTUALLY hung up on me!"

Bittersweet: "I'm making a list of wonderful Irish people."
Potterride: "Me!"
Bittersweet: "You're not Irish. Or wonderful."Bittersweet: "Or a PERSON."

"You can't just name everyone Frodo." -Bittersweet x

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Another Form of the Avian Bird Flu by St. Fang of Boredom reviews
So, Fang gets sick. The flu, to be exact. And, of course, he has to pull a whole 'Whining Macho Prince' thing about it. Max and Dr. Martinez deal with Fang's attitude, Iggy tries to boycott Campbell's Soup, the Flock play with a blender, and...FAX! Eggy!
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 68 - Words: 103,238 - Reviews: 4222 - Favs: 1,132 - Follows: 830 - Updated: 3/13/2013 - Published: 10/3/2008 - Fang, Max
Victoire by TheDarkSideDoesItBetter reviews
Because she's Victoire and who can compete with perfection? Weasley girls thoughts on Victoire /Freeverse/
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Poetry - Chapters: 6 - Words: 971 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 8/27/2011 - Published: 7/23/2011 - Victoire W., Teddy L. - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The War That Continues Ending All Wars reviews
Sequel to "The War to End All Wars"! The prank war rages on, covering all of Hogwarts and more. But who's sanities - and lives - will it cost?
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 4,470 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 12/30/2012 - Published: 4/24/2012 - Remus L., George W.
The War to End All Wars reviews
War is declared. A prank war, that is. The wizarding world will never be the same. PART ONE.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 15 - Words: 24,890 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 2/19/2012 - Published: 3/16/2011 - Fred W., Sirius B.
Sisters Know Best reviews
One warm summer day, Ginny is watching her brothers and plans their future.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 970 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 4 - Published: 11/19/2011 - Ginny W.