QuilavaKing
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Joined 03-28-11, id: 2811705, Profile Updated: 07-12-11

What my mother taught me:

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why.

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck?"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

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You're In The Army Now! by Malthazar Lord of Shadows reviews
In an attempt to escape his problems Soul Evans joins the army, but with a trigger happy drill sergeant,A gossiping cook,and an attractive colonel, The infamous Fort Shibusen may have more in store for him then he thought.
Soul Eater - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 29 - Words: 79,244 - Reviews: 384 - Favs: 288 - Follows: 338 - Updated: 11/12/2014 - Published: 7/18/2011 - Maka A., Soul Eater
Madness by Tsukiko-Chama reviews
Marie Mjolnir is new in town. Stein is an experimental doctor. When she falls for the insane and mad man, she discovers that his seven experements are actually just troubled teens who long for help. But can she help them before it's too late for her?
Soul Eater - Rated: M - English - Romance/Horror - Chapters: 13 - Words: 26,573 - Reviews: 49 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 8/24/2014 - Published: 5/26/2011 - Franken Stein, Marie M. - Complete
The Perfect Resonance by NikolaiEvans115 reviews
Soul and Maka have always had feelings for eachother, and they both acknowledge that. Heated romance, Inspiring friendship, and pure action; with some comedy thrown in. SoulxMaka
Soul Eater - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 17 - Words: 42,868 - Reviews: 214 - Favs: 96 - Follows: 70 - Updated: 9/3/2012 - Published: 6/1/2011 - Maka A., Soul Eater
Where Do We Go When We Die? by ParadiseAvenger reviews
MOVED! The day her mother's cryptic postcard arrived, Maka Albarn did something she had never done before and had never wanted to. She bought a slave! She had to, though, because he was inches from a cruel death. AU. Adult themes. MakaXSoul. (65 Chapters.) MOVED!
Soul Eater - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,206 - Reviews: 1392 - Favs: 409 - Follows: 180 - Updated: 6/21/2012 - Published: 6/1/2011 - Maka A., Soul Eater - Complete
Eat My Soul by Tatsu-Ah-Rei reviews
Her mission is to transfer to Shibusen Academy to find an Evil soul. But the thing is…Shibusen's an all-boy's school. MakaxSoul.
Soul Eater - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 40 - Words: 200,697 - Reviews: 905 - Favs: 382 - Follows: 292 - Updated: 12/8/2011 - Published: 7/3/2011 - Maka A., Soul Eater
Errors In Continuity Special: Soul Eater by ZeroVX reviews
Just when the teenage scythe meister and the demon swordsman thought it was safe to read bad fanfics again...rated for language.
Soul Eater - Rated: M - English - Romance/Parody - Chapters: 29 - Words: 299,346 - Reviews: 275 - Favs: 86 - Follows: 59 - Updated: 11/8/2011 - Published: 6/25/2011 - Crona, Maka A.
Another World? by IcyIsEverybody'sFool reviews
For Miku, Misty, Luna, Haru, and Raven, it's the beginning of a new school year. But what if they find a manga book in the forest, and are transported to Hyrule to help Red, Blue, Green, Vio, and Shadow..? ON HIATUS
Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 7 - Words: 8,005 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 10/16/2011 - Published: 7/21/2011
Summer Excitement by wyldephyredragon reviews
It was like any other summer for Maka Albarn, until she found herself stuck with an "old friend". Why is she so hell-bent on killing him? What about him drives Soul crazy? Rating for some language. Mostly SoMa, but a good dose of MakaxOC.
Soul Eater - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 23,315 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 9/27/2011 - Published: 7/12/2011 - Maka A., Soul Eater
Soul Admiration by snowbunnie13 reviews
Second in the Soul Equilibrium series. Maka was about to lift her hand to chop him but couldn't. There must be something wrong with her! "Soul, quick, make fun of my breasts!"
Soul Eater - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 10 - Words: 23,298 - Reviews: 64 - Favs: 62 - Follows: 35 - Updated: 8/5/2011 - Published: 6/3/2011 - Maka A., Soul Eater - Complete
Fluffy Puppy Trio by AngelOfFluffiness reviews
Following Soul's Fluffy Kitten. A fight with a witch gets the three men of the seven main students turned into canines. Bonds deepen and hilariousness ensues for the seven DWMA students. Soka primary , BlackStar/Tsubaki. Includes Kid and Thompsons too.
Soul Eater - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 24,562 - Reviews: 80 - Favs: 83 - Follows: 33 - Updated: 8/2/2011 - Published: 6/4/2011 - Maka A., Soul Eater - Complete
Stitches, Scars, and Memories by MoonDropCookie reviews
"He's gone... but why does his presence still haunt me? Why do I still feel like he is alive? These thoughts will never cease to pursue me... The pain will never stop..." SoMa
Soul Eater - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 10,910 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 7/26/2011 - Published: 6/15/2011 - Soul Eater, Maka A.
Soul Eater: Destroying a Perfect Soul by Narusaku1357 reviews
4 years after the attack from Medusa, things seem to be peaceful here in Death City. Soul and I are happy, Wes is alive and well, and all our friends have their dream jobs! I had no idea that all that peace was going to go straight to hell in one night...
Soul Eater - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 27 - Words: 117,501 - Reviews: 429 - Favs: 167 - Follows: 110 - Updated: 7/24/2011 - Published: 9/20/2010 - Maka A., Soul Eater
Daddy's Rules for Dating by crazychick1313 reviews
These are the rules Spirit has for ANY guy that dares to so much as look at his little Maka. Boys beware!
Soul Eater - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,551 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 70 - Follows: 53 - Updated: 7/22/2011 - Published: 7/19/2011 - Soul Eater, Maka A.
Kinda Amazing by Pyocola Analogue III reviews
AU When Soul Evans life goes right down the crapper, he is forced to become a server at a popular restaurant. Will Soul be able to handle the customers, the sidework, and the bossy yet somewhat hot daughter of his new boss all at the same? SoMa
Soul Eater - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 13 - Words: 52,244 - Reviews: 130 - Favs: 144 - Follows: 59 - Updated: 7/22/2011 - Published: 5/7/2011 - Soul Eater, Maka A. - Complete
DWMA Prom by Shingeki no Shiba reviews
The characters of Soul Eater go to the prom. Yeah, you know this is gonna be bad. Warning: some cursing, some yaoi, and both male!Crona and female!Crona.
Soul Eater - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 7,961 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 7/19/2011 - Published: 7/16/2011 - Crona, Death The Kid - Complete
Great, as if blair was enough by crazychick1313 reviews
Blair received a letter from her brother that he was coming to Death City. Blair's brother takes a liking to Maka. A little too much in Soul's opinion. Jealousy rises. It's a straight out war for Maka's heart.
Soul Eater - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 8,863 - Reviews: 131 - Favs: 87 - Follows: 55 - Updated: 7/18/2011 - Published: 1/20/2011 - Soul Eater, Maka A. - Complete
Soul's important to live lesson by raelynn gross reviews
Soul has to teach for Stien as part of his death scythe studies. but what lesson should he teach...
Soul Eater - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 955 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/10/2011 - Maka A., Soul Eater - Complete
A New Day by KokoKitsune reviews
It was Sunday evening and Maka Albarn was cooking dinner at her house. Her house included Soul Eater and Blair the cat. Maka had been starting to make a stew when she got a call on her cellphone. Crappy Summary SoMa
Soul Eater - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 9 - Words: 20,228 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 6/22/2011 - Published: 4/13/2011 - Maka A., Soul Eater - Complete
Is This Sound Okay? by SunshineSong reviews
Death City Kid is an aspiring band. They're looking for something add to their sound & increase their following. Just when it seemed like they never would, their manager brings in an old friend with a unique sound and talent to boot. AU. MXS.
Soul Eater - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 47,616 - Reviews: 87 - Favs: 149 - Follows: 51 - Updated: 6/16/2011 - Published: 4/23/2011 - Maka A., Soul Eater - Complete
Soul Eater NarutoFMA by KaminoShimobe reviews
I know it says Soul Eater but I put it here because it wouldn't let me do a crossover with Naruto and FMA. This story is about a new school. Naruto characters, Soul Eater,FMA attend the school and find new thing about the others,and My ideas!
Soul Eater - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 30 - Words: 20,048 - Reviews: 86 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 6/13/2011 - Published: 3/24/2011 - Soul Eater, Maka A. - Complete
The Inner Soul by spawnspectre reviews
Elite Unit Spartoi is assigned to a peninsula to protect it. Upon arrival of the advancing party, Soul and Maka save a boy. Will that boy change the lives of his new friends? 1st chapter is prologue
Soul Eater - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 11,363 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 6/6/2011 - Published: 3/13/2010 - Soul Eater, Maka A.
Unintended Medicine by PuppyNoelle reviews
Maka goes on the Pill to help alleviate her troublesome menstrual symptoms, but things become skewed when Soul finds out about her new prescription. SoulxMaka, multi-chap, LEMONY.
Soul Eater - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 22 - Words: 50,685 - Reviews: 517 - Favs: 619 - Follows: 252 - Updated: 6/5/2011 - Published: 3/3/2011 - Maka A., Soul Eater - Complete
To Love Is To Hate To Fight Is To Break by Mistaken-Soul Eatter reviews
Maka and Soul have been partners and best friends for a year. Now that Maka is 15 and Soul is 16, they start to get normal teenage hormones, and start to get strange feelings for eachother...
Soul Eater - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 10,639 - Reviews: 117 - Favs: 95 - Follows: 85 - Updated: 6/3/2011 - Published: 9/29/2010 - Maka A., Soul Eater
South Eater by RabuPep reviews
Oh, my! When you take the hilarity of South Park and collide it with the creepy craziness of Soul Eater, hijinks ensue! It's a crack-tastic crossover extravaganza with a sprinkle of shounen-ai !
Crossover - South Park & Soul Eater - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 5,888 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 37 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 5/13/2011 - Published: 1/19/2011
Book 1: Light Of Love by Malthazar Lord of Shadows reviews
Just a few months after he saves the realms a heart-broken Link is sent by the princess on another journey.
Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 14 - Words: 53,903 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 9/14/2009 - Published: 5/25/2009 - Link, Midna - Complete