Author has written 29 stories for Harry Potter, God of War, Death Note, Lord of the Rings, Forbidden Kingdom, Percy Jackson and the Olympians, Dracula 2000, Game of Thrones, Avengers, and Oliver Twist.
Real Name: Patrick Palmer
Interests: Music, Literature, Religion, Foreign Languages, Movies
Favorite Musical Artists: There are too many to mention, but they include (in NO order whatsover)
Foreign Languages: French is my official second language, then I also know some Spanish, and am also interested in Latin, Greek, Italian, the list goes on and on ...
Literature: Top work is Harry Potter, followed closely by Lord of the Rings, Chronicles of Narnia, Percy Jackson & The Olympians, and a whole lot more ...
Favorite Authors: J.K. Rowling, C.S. Lewis, J.R.R. Tollkien, G.K. Chesterton, Stephen King, Ernest Hemingway, F. Scott Fitzgerald (again, it's a long list ...)
Movies: Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, Chronicles of Narnia, The Matrix series, The Godfather trilogy, Groundhog Day, and a whole lot more ...
And now for some Harry Potter Questions ... :)
Generic Questions about Fanfic Writing ...
What was the first Fanfic you ever read? Hmm ... tough to say ... "A Kiss Can Save the World" by robst was one of the earliest ones I read ... (and that was on Portkey.)
About my fanfics ...
1. Harry Potter & the Prince of Olympus: This was inspired to me by a parody I was working on in a script format. Since Fanfiction dot net does not accept that particular format, I decided to redo it in a story format, with some obvious changes as the story unfolded. Three of the characters are alter-egos, one of Yours Truly, and the others of a couple friends of mine :) The original title was "Harry Potter and the Filii Fulminis."
2. Harry Potter's Kicking Some Butt: A little musical parody I came up with describing what I thought Book 7 would end up like. The first time I read the books, Book 7 had not come out yet. It's set to the tune of "Santa Claus is Coming to Town."
3. Harry Potter And the Casino Royale: COMPLETED. Due to some negative reactions I got from fans about the way I ended it, I decided to redo the last two Chapters. Inspired mainly by the movie, but with a few differences ;) Considering sequel ...
4. Don't Anger Harry Potter: COMPLETED. This fanfic starts off the premise of ChaOtic ReApeR's Joined Souls Challenge.
5. The DEE DEE DEE Causeway: COMPLETED. It's simply based off of a scene from "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part II". Not for fans of Ron Weasley ...
6. Harry Potter at the Oscars: The Academy has one more shot to give the Harry Potter series of films an Oscar -- one would be great, more would be better. What if the Harry Potter characters were to show up for an Oscars ceremony -- hosted by Yours Truly and his Muse? :)
7. Angel of Death: Based on Proud Mudblood's Year Two Challenge, but with a Dark Twist ... ;)
8. The Night a Friendship Died: COMPLETED. A re-imagining of the Yule Ball from Harry's perspective. H/Hr, of course. Again, not for fans of Ron Weasley ... unless you like seeing him get hurt ... ;)
9. Operatic Moments. IN PROGRESS. Short operatic moments with Harry Potter. HP/HG, of course.
10. Harry Potter and the Shinigami (ハリーポッターと死神). After his death, Light Yagami has been watching the case of Harry Potter, who has been having some trouble defeating Voldemort. HP/HG. In English with some Japanese (with subtitles, of course).
11. D.A.H.P. II: Il Potterino. The sequel to the ever-popular "Don't Anger Harry Potter." Lord Harry Potter and his Family move out to America, the Land of Opportunity. HP/HG
12. Sauronion: Son of Sauron. Sauron had died at the end of Middle Earth's Third Age, but he had a daughter known as Lilith. Years later, she had a son by the name of Harry Potter. Would the darkness claim him? HP/HG
13. Harry Potter: Student of the Monkey King (哈利波特：猴王的学生). A couple friends of Sirius Black come to help out his godson ... from China! HP/HG, of course.
14. Renewal. A one-shot alternative ending to God of War III. Kratos/Aphrodite. COMPLETE.
15. Son of the Joker. What if all the time in Azkaban had driven Sirius Black mad? HP/HG.
16. Harry Almighty. Harry is fed up with the suffering he has endured in his life, and finds himself yelling at God about it. Little does he expect a response ... HP/HG.
17. Death's Blessing. Sequel to "Renewal." The new gods and goddesses of Olympus have taken an interest in Harry Potter, in particular the Lord of the Underworld ... HP/HG.
18. Darkness Arisen. The battle at the Department of Mysteries was the beginning of the end for Voldemort and his Death Eaters. They could try to kill Harry Potter all they liked, but when one of them tries to kill Hermione, all Hell breaks loose ... H/Hr.
19. Loki Palmer's Madhouse Kitchen. DZ2 has the right idea with his Den of Delights. Now presenting, for your reading pleasure, servings of literary stew from my Madhouse Kitchen. H/Hr, of course.
20. King of the Outcasts. A response to DZ2's "Let It Go" Challenge. Harry has found himself an outcast for far too long, in spite of saving the world so many times. He may as well be their King. H/Hr.
21. Half Blood Harry Potter. Towards the end of his third year, Harry Potter makes a shocking discovery (pun fully intended). Not only is he a powerful wizard, he's also a demigod. A response to DZ2's "Twice Blessed Half Blood Challenge." HP/HG, PJ/AC
22. Dry Her Eyes. Harry Potter has had enough of Ronald Weasley and the way he makes Hermione cry, so he does something about it. Not for fans of Ron Weasley, of course. HP/HG.
23. Fire and Blood. Sirius Black, Hermione Granger, and Harry Potter all have dreams of a world long forgotten. What could it all mean? HP/HG. Crossover between Game of Thrones and Harry Potter.
To all flamers/complainers/whiners: If you don't like my story, nobody says you have to like it – use the Back button and do not leave a flaming bag of excrement on my literary doorstep. Take your flames and shove them where the sun doesn't shine: up your posterior!
If you have CONSTRUCTIVE, POSITIVE criticism, that's another matter, but if your criticism is purely DESTRUCTIVE and NEGATIVE, SHUT UP AND GO SHAG YOURSELF! I'm writing the story in the way I want, and if you don't like it, you are welcome to go elsewhere.
Favorite Personal Quotes:
"Life is full of what I like to call 'Homer Simpson moments.' It just depends on what you plan to -- D'OH!!! -- about them."
"On the Sixth Day, God created Man. Looking at what He had created, He thought, 'Hey, you know what? I can do better.' "
"I am convinced that not only is Mother Nature a schizophrenic, she's also psychotic."
"Does anybody have the number for Mother Nature's shrink?"
"The rich get richer and the poor get poorer; where's Robin Hood when you need him?"
"Life is too short to complain, so enjoy it while you can!"
"If I don't put a smile on at least one person's face, I haven't had a good day."
"If chocolate is the food of the gods, then caffeine -- in all its myriad forms -- must surely be their drink."
"We're all crazy ... some of us more than others ..."
"The Circle of Life: Horse eats grass. Horse poops. Grass grows."
"Tobacco and caffeine: the perfect marriage ..."
Favorite Movie Quotes (and quotes from other sources ;) ):
"You see ... madness is like gravity ... all it takes is just one little push." -- The Joker in "The Dark Knight"
"Do I look like a guy with a plan? I'm just a dog chasing cars ... I wouldn't know what to do with one if I caught it!" -- The Joker in "The Dark Knight"
"Fell deeds awake ... now for wrath, now for ruin, and a red dawn! FORTH EORLINGAS!" -- King Théoden in "The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers"
"Arise! Arise, riders of Théoden! Spears shall be shaken, shields shall be splintered -- a sword day, a red day, ere the sun rises! Ride now! Ride now! Ride to ruin, and the world's ending!" -- King Théoden in "The Lord of the Rings: Return of the King"
"Hold your ground! Hold your ground! Sons of Gondor, of Rohan, my brothers! I see in your eyes the same fear that would take the heart of me! A day may come when the courage of Men fails, when we forsake our friends and break all bonds of fellowship, but it is not this day. A day of wolves and shattered shields when the Hour of Men comes crashing down, but IT IS NOT THIS DAY! THIS DAY WE FIGHT! By all that you hold dear on this good Earth, I bid you STAND, MEN OF THE WEST!" -- Aragorn in "The Lord of the Rings: Return of the King"
"What do you mean, I'm funny?" -- Tommy in "Goodfellas"
"If you beat Nicky with fists, he comes back with a bat. If you beat him with a bat, he comes back with a gun. And if you beat him with a gun, you'd better kill him, because he'll keep coming back and back until one of you is dead." -- Sam "Ace" Rothstein in "Casino"
"Stupid ball, that's your home! Are you too good for your home? ANSWER ME!" -- Happy Gilmore
"I find your lack of faith ... disturbing ..." -- Darth Vader in "Star Wars"
"I see your Schwartz is just as big as mine ... now let's see if you know how to handle it!" -- Dark Helmet in "Spaceballs"
"You went over my helmet?" -- Dark Helmet in "Spaceballs"
"Knight jumps Queen! Everybody jumps Queen! It's good to be the king ..." -- King Louis XVI in "History of the World: Part I"
"One day, and that day may never come, I will call upon you to do a service for me. Until that day, accept this on the day of my daughter's wedding ... as a gift." -- Don Vito Corleone in "The Godfather"
"I'm gonna make him an offer he can't refuse." -- Don Vito Corleone in "The Godfather"
"I know it was you, Fredo. You broke my heart! You broke my heart!" -- Michael Corleone in "The Godfather Part II"
"Everything is the devil to you, Mama! Well, I like school, and I like football! And I'm gonna keep doin' them both because they make me feel good! And by the way, Mama, alligators are ornery 'cause of their medulla oblongata! And I like Vicki, and she likes me back! And she showed me her BOOBIES and I liked them too!" -- Bobby Boucher in "The Waterboy"
"What's wrong with death, sir? What are we so mortally afraid of? Why can't we treat death with a certain amount of humanity and dignity, and decency, and God forbid, maybe even humor? Death is not the enemy, gentlemen. If we're going to fight a disease, let's fight one of the most terrible diseases of all, indifference." -- Patch Adams
"Careful, boys, that aeronaut equipment is volatile ... I wanna die in a rocking chair, not a hydrogen fire." --Lee Scoresby in "The Golden Compass"
「僕は。。。正義だ!」 (I am ... justice!) -- Light Yagami/Kira in "Death Note"
「ポテチを取り。。。食べる！」 (I will take a chip ... and eat it!) -- Light Yagami/Kira in "Death Note"
"FREEDOM!!!!" -- William Wallace in "Braveheart"
"-What? Are you scared of a little lightning?
"Hulk: smash!" -- Captain America in "The Avengers"
"Puny god." -- Hulk in "The Avengers"
"In the beginning, the universe was created. This has made many people very angry and has been widely regarded as a bad move." -- Douglas Adams
"Many that live deserve death. And some that die deserve life. Can you give it to them? Then do not be too eager to deal out death in judgement. For even the very wise cannot see all ends." -- Gandalf in "Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring"
「ゴミはゴミ箱に。犯罪者はキラ様に。」 (Trash to trash can. Criminals to Kira.) -- an anonymous cell phone in "Death Note"
「この世は。。。腐ってる。」 (This world ... is rotten.) -- Light Yagami and Ryuk in "Death Note"
"Idolatry is committed, not merely by setting up false gods, but also by setting up false devils; by making men afraid of war or alcohol, or economic law, when they should be afraid of spiritual corruption and cowardice. The Moslems say, 'There is no God but God.' The English Moslems, the abstainers, have to learn to remember that there is no Satan but Satan." -- G.K. Chesterton
"Courage is almost a contradiction in terms. It means a strong desire to live taking the form of a readiness to die." -- G.K. Chesterton
"-It's like in the great stories, Mr. Frodo. The ones that really mattered. Full of darkness and danger, they were. And sometimes you didn't want to know the end, because how could the end be happy? How could the world go back to the way it was after so much bad had happened? But, in the end, it's only a passing thing, this shadow. Even darkness must pass. A new day will come, and when the sun shines it will shine out the clearer. Those were the stories that stayed with you, that meant something, even if you were too small to understand why. But I think, Mr. Frodo, I do understand. I know now. Folk in those stories had lots of chances of turning back, only they didn't. They kept going because they were holding onto something.
"The wrath of God lies sleeping. It was hid a million years before men were and only men have power to wake it. Hell aint half full. Hear me. Ye carry war of a madman's making onto a foreign land. Ye'll wake more than the dogs." -- The Mennonite in Cormac McCarthy's "Blood Meridian"
"-Am I cursed?
"Kneel before me! I said ... [slams staff] KNEEL! Is not this simpler? Is this not your natural state? It's the unspoken truth of humanity that you crave subjugation. The bright lure of freedom diminishes your life's joy in a mad scramble for power ... for identity ... you were made to be ruled. In the end, you will always kneel." -- Loki in "The Avengers"
"-I'm going to win this war in three days.
"When you play the game of thrones, you win or you die. There is no middle ground." -- Queen Cersei Lannister to Eddard Stark in "Game of Thrones"
"A Lannister always pays his debts." -- Tyrion Lannister in "Game of Thrones"
"-The boy [Bran] means nothing to me. And I can't abide the wailing of women ...
"-My Lord Father taught me it was death to bare your steel in the presence of your liege lord. Doubtless, the Greatjon only meant to cut my meat for me.
"-We've had vicious kings, and we've had idiot kings, but I don't know if we've ever been cursed with a vicious idiot for a king!
"-What did you once call me? A drunken, little lust-filled beast.
"Good men don't need rules. Today's not the day to find out why I have so many." -- The Eleventh Doctor
"Hello, leftie! Welcome back! NEVER do that to me again!" -- The Eleventh Doctor
"-You know, the thing about a time machine, you can run away all you like, and still be back in time for tea, so what do you say? Anywhere. All of time and space right outside those doors.
"Those words. RUN AWAY. I want you to be famous for those exact words. I want people to call you Colonel Run Away. I want children laughing outside your door because they found the house of Colonel Run Away, and when people come to you and ask if trying to get to me through the people I LOVE is in any way a good idea ... I want you to tell them your name." -- The Eleventh Doctor
"-Can I ask you the biggest favor in the world?