Shadow S. Korosu
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Joined 04-26-11, id: 2876938, Profile Updated: 11-08-19
Author has written 4 stories for Harry Potter, Code Lyoko, Dragon Ball Z, Misc. Anime/Manga, Manhwa/Korean Comics/만화, Naruto, and Dungeons and Dragons.

Name: As far as you know, it's Shadow Korosu.

Age: 22 (Or is it?)

Birthday: 8-25-97

Gender: Male

Species: Angelic Demon (Or was it Demonic Angel?)

Likes: Movies, music, food, reading, writing, chess, checkers, video games, RP, animals, Naruto, Bleach, Death Note, Dragon Ball Z, Code Geass, Cartoon Network, Adult Swim, Disney, Nickelodeon.

Dislikes: Murderers, rapists, morons/unbelievably stupid people, people who absolutely refuse to be wrong, people who think others are below them, people who think it's okay to call someone a freak, creep, or weirdo, just because they're different, people who think that just because they're older, or an adult, it means they can ignore or disrespect someone younger, or their opinions and ideas, people who think that you can try to control love, or that differences such as age, appearance, gender, or religion means you can't love someone, and people who always tell others to act their age.

Hobbies: Reading, writing, watching movies, listening to music, playing video games, RP, playing with my cats or my dog, arguing to the death about anything and everything.

Dream: To have a family of my own, to love and protect.

Strengths: Can vary between mature and immature as needed, very creative, intelligent, loyal, honest, a good listener, works hard to learn and do new things, modest, open minded, not afraid to stand up for what I believe in.

Weaknesses: Low opinion of myself, can be slightly hypocritical at times, sometimes brash, somewhat closed off emotionally, can be evasive to certain questions or topics.


I'm Sorry aka Girls don't realize these things

I'm sorry
That I bought you roses to tell you that I like you

I'm sorry
That I was raised with respect not to sleep with you when you were drunk

I'm sorry
That my body's not ripped enough to "satisfy" your wants

I'm sorry
That I open your car door, and pull out your chair like I was raised

I'm sorry
That I'm not cute enough to be "your guy"

I'm sorry
That I am actually nice; not a jerk

I'm sorry
I don't have a huge bank account to buy you expensive things

I'm sorry
I like to spend quality nights at home cuddling with you, instead of at a club

I'm sorry
I would rather make love to you then just screw you like some random guy.

I'm sorry
That I am always the one you need to talk to, but never good enough to date

I'm sorry
That I always held your hair back when you threw up, and didn't get mad at you for puking in my car, but when we went out you went home with another guy

I'm sorry
That I am there to pick you up at 4am when your new man hit you and dropped you off in the middle of nowhere, but not good enough to listen to me when I need a friend

I'm sorry
If I start not being there because it hurts being used as a door mat, only to be thrown to the side when the new jerk comes around

I'm sorry
If I don't answer my phone anymore when you call, to listen to you cry for hours, instead of getting a couple hours of sleep before work

I'm sorry
That you can't realize.. I've been the one all along.

I'm sorry
If you read this and know somebody like this but don't care

But most of all

I'm sorry
For not being sorry anymore

I'm sorry
That you can't accept me for who I am

I'm sorry
I can never do anything right, and nothing that I do is good enough to make it in your world.

I'm sorry
I caught your boyfriend with another girl and told you about it, I thought that was what friends were for...

I'm sorry
That I told you I loved you and actually meant it.

I'm sorry
That I talked to you for nine hours on Thanksgiving when your boyfriend was threatening you instead of spending time with my family.

I'm Sorry
That I cared

I'm sorry
That I listen to you at night talking about how you wish you could have done something different.

Ladies always complain and gripe to their friends that there is never any good guys out there, and they always end up with assholes who mistreat them. Well ladies, next time you're complaining, maybe look up to see who you're complaining to, maybe that special someone is right there hanging on your every word as usual, screaming in his head "Why won't you give me a chance?" Because the person you are usually searching for is right by you.

If you're a guy and you agree with this letter, copy and paste into your profile as 'I'm sorry'

If You're one of the FEW girls with enough BALLS to copy and paste this into your profile, and you would never make your guy feel this way, copy and paste into your profile as 'Girls Don't Realize These Things'.


Cute ones:

Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?
Boy: No

Girl: Do you like me?
Boy: No

Girl: Do you want me?
Boy: No

Girl: Would you cry if I left?
Boy: No

Girl: Would you live for me?
Boy: No

Girl: Would you do anything for me?
Boy: No

Girl: Choose--me or your life
Boy: My life

The girl runs away in shock and pain and the boy runs after her and says...

The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind.

The reason why I don't like you is because I love you.

The reason I don't want you is because I need you.

The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left.

The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you.

The reason why I'm not willing to do you anything for you is because I would do everything for you.

The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life.

If you find this incredibly cute and touching, copy and paste it into your profile.


A few annoying stereotypes: Bold the ones that apply to you.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be a nerd that does homework 24/7.
I’m AMERICAN, so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm AUSTRALIAN, so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroos.
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm GERMAN, so I MUST be a Nazi.
I'm HAITIAN, so I MUST eat cat.
I'm HAWAIIAN, so I MUST be lazy.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm ITALIAN, so I MUST have a "big one".
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited.
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and that’s how Russians roll.
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13.
I'm SCOTTISH, so I MUST have ginger hair and wear a skirt (it's actually called a kilt).
I'm SWEDISH, so I MUST be white.
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm WELSH, so I MUST love sheep.
I'm TEXAN, so I MUST ride a horse.
I'm PAGAN, so I MUST worship Satan.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I’m WICCAN, so I MUST be a Satanist.
I'm MUSLIM, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I have MY OWN SPIRITUAL IDEOLOGY, so I MUST be wrong or misguided.
I'm an ATHEIST, so I MUST hate the world.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN, so I MUST just need converting. (Anyone who tries to, will be shot. Survivors will be shot again.)
I DON’T HAVE A RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals.
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I'm LIBERAL, so I MUST encourage abortion.
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm SINGLE, so I MUST be ugly.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I'm a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I hang out with GAYS, so I must be GAY TOO.
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE so I MUST be a whore myself.
I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I take (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a GIRL WHO ACTUALLY EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a DANCER, So I MUST be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a GUY WHO WEARS TIGHT PANTS, so I MUST be emo.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.

I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST only wear black and date only other punks.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I get STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, So I must be gay.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm a STONER, so I MUST be going in the wrong direction.
I'm STRAIGHT EDGE, so I MUST be violent.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST believe "Jesus wuz a brotha"
I'm a FEMALE OTAKU, so I MUST be ugly.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm a SKATER, so I MUST do weed and steal stuff.
I'm MIXED, so I MUST be screwed up.
I'm MORMON, so I MUST be perfect.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz.
I'm WHITE AND HAVE BLACK FRIENDS, so I MUST think I'm black.
I'm GOTH, so I MUST worship the devil.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO, so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive. (Well... yes and no.)
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a stereotype.

I CHAT, so I MUST be having cyber sex.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I HAVE A LOT OF FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I HANG OUT WITH TEENAGE DRINKERS AND SMOKERS, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I DON’T LIKE TO BE IN A BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT SENSE OF HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I TELL PEOPLE OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
I have GREASY HAIR, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.

I draw ANIME, so I MUST be a freak.
I’m a FANGIRL, so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I'm an ONLY CHILD, so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT, so I MUST be weak.
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I MUST be a vampire. (I wish.)
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m NOT POPULAR, so I MUST be a loser.
I CARE ABOUT THE ENVIRONMENT, so I MUST be a tree hugging hippy.
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-Sue.
I play VIDEO GAMES, so I MUST be a loser.
I like GAMES, ANIME AND COMICS, so I MUST be childish.
I read COMICS, so I MUST be a loser.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be irresponsible.
I like READING, so I MUST be a loner.
I DISAGREE WITH MY GOVERNMENT, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I’m a WITCH, so I MUST be an old hag and fly on a broomstick.
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be labelled.
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I’m STRONG, so I MUST be stupid.
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times.
I love MARCHING BANDS, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I CRY easily, so I MUST be a wimp.
I CAN’T HELP POINTING OUT MISTAKES, so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist.
I'm a PERFECTIONIST, so I MUST check everything ten times, then burst into tears at one mistake.
I DON’T LIKE TO TALK ABOUT MY PERSONAL LIFE, so I MUST be having problems.
I like FIRE, so I must be an arsonist.
I'm HOMESCHOOLED, so I MUST have no life or friends.
I'm on a TEAM, so I MUST hate everyone that's not.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.

B.O.H.I.C.A. : Bend Over Here It Comes Again

F.U.B.A.R. : F#cked up beyond all recognition

H.U.M.A.S. : Head Up My @ss Syndrom

S.N.A.F.U. : Situation Normal All F*cked Up

A.D.O.S.D. : Attention Deficit Oh Shiny Disorder

F.O.C.U.S. : F*ck Off Cuz Ur Stupid - T-shirt

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F. : Do I Look Like I Give A F*ck! - Necros Chris


Interesting and insane laws:

Detonating a nuclear device within the city limits results in a 500 dollar fine.

It is illegal for horses to eat fire hydrants.

It is illegal to allow a dog to be in a public place without its master on a leash.

It is illegal to allow a pet cat to run loose without a taillight.

It is illegal to carry a lunch down the street between 11 and 1 o'clock.

It is illegal to drive a motor vehicle on city streets unless a man with a lantern is walking ahead of it.

It is illegal to eat in a place that is on fire.

It is illegal to have sex on a parked motorcycle. (What if it's moving?)

It is illegal to purchase an alcoholic beverage after midnight on Sunday, yet one may do so on Monday.

It is illegal to purchase or use Sparklers in the city, yet you can buy fully disassembled automatic machine guns.

It is illegal to ride a bicycle in a swimming pool.

It is illegal to shoot at any kind of game from a moving vehicle, unless the target is a whale.

It is illegal to wake a fireman when he is asleep.

And last but not least... the penalty for jumping off a building is death.


Just a few questions in need of an answer:

Why don't they just make mouse-flavoured cat food?

Why do doctors call what they do "practice"?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

What would the speed of lightning be if it didn't zigzag?

If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation?

Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?

Why do doctors leave the room when you strip? They're going to see you naked anyway.

If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?

What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

Do cannibals refuse to eat clowns because they taste funny?

If you try to fail and succeed, what have you done?

If the police arrest a mute, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?

If the speed of light is 300,000 kilometres per second, what's the speed of dark?

Why do dogs get mad when you blow in their face and then they stick their head out the window in a car?

Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavour, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?

Why does round pizza come in a square box?

Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?

Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?

Why is it that to turn off Windows, you have to click on "Start"?

If you're sending someone some Styrofoam, what do you pack it in?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why does the word "lisp" have an "s" in it?

If vegetable oil made from veggies and oil, what is baby oil made of?

Can fat people go skinny-dipping?

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

How much deeper would oceans be if sponges didn't live there?

Mousetraps are operated by people, right? Now, isn't Disney World a people trap operated by a mouse?

Why does the sun make our hair lighter and our skin darker?

Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

Why do psychics have to ask your name?

If a fat chicken laid eggs, would it sit on them?

How is it possible to have a civil war?

How does the guy who drives the snowplough get to work in the morning?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance that little indestructible black box is?

If quitters never win, and winners never quit, why do people say, "Quit while you're ahead"?

Why do our noses run and our feet smell?

Why do people say "slept like a baby" when babies wake up and cry every two hours?

Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?

If a bus station is where a bus stops, and a train station is where a train stops, then what happens at a workstation?

If sheep coats are made of wool, why don't they shrink when it rains?

Light travels faster than sound - is that why some people appear bright before you hear them speak?

What was the best thing before sliced bread?

Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor since you can't drink and drive?

Can you cry underwater?

If money doesn’t grow on trees, then why do banks have branches?

Why are marbles so called when they’re made out of glass?

How can something be both new and improved?

If the sign says "Keep Off The Grass", how did it get there in the first place?


7 reasons not to mess with kids

Reason 1 A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible. The little girl said, “When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah.” The teacher asked, ” What if Jonah went to hell?” The little girl replied, “Then you ask him”.

Reason 2 A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child’s work. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was. The girl replied, “I’m drawing God.” The teacher paused and said, “But no one knows what God looks like.” Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, “They will in a minute.”

Reason 3 A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year old. After explaining the commandment to “honor” thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, “Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?” Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, “Thou shall not kill.”

Reason 4 One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head. She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, “Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?” Her mother replied, “Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white.” The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, “Momma, how come ALL of grandma’s hairs are white?”

Reason 5 The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture. “Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, ‘There’s Jennifer, she’s a lawyer,’ or ‘That’s Michael, he’s a doctor.’ A small voice at the back of the room rang out,”And there’s the teacher, she’s dead. ”

Reason 6 A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, “Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face..” “Yes,” the class said. “Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn’t run into my feet?” A little fellow shouted, “Cause your feet ain’t empty.”

Reason 7 The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: “Take only ONE. God is watching.” Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note, “Take all you want - God is watching the apples.


Lines that Make You Smile

1. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't.

2. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.

3. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.

4. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

5. Don't take life too seriously; no one gets out alive.

6. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.

7. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

8. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.

9. I'm not a complete idiot -- Some parts are just missing.

10. Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

11. NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning medicine.

12. God must love stupid people; He made so many.

13. The gene pool could use a little chlorine.

14. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.

15. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

16. Being 'over the hill' is much better than being under it!

17. Wrinkled Was NOT One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up!

18. Procrastinate Now!

19. I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts; Do You Want Fries With That?

20. A hangover is the wrath of grapes.

21. A journey of a thousand miles must, begin with a cash advance.

22. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!

23. He who dies with the most toys, is nonetheless DEAD.

24. A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand times the memory.

25. Ham and eggs...A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig.

26. The trouble with life is there's no background music.

27. The original point and click interface was a Smith & Wesson.

28. I smile because I don't know what the heck is going on.


MANLAW

The male equivalent of the 10 Commandments

1: Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.

2: It is OK for a man to cry ONLY under the following circumstances:
(a) When a heroic dog dies to save its master.
(b) The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse.
(c) After wrecking your boss’s car.
(d) One hour, 12 minutes, 37 seconds into “The Crying Game”.
(e) When she is using her teeth.

3: Any Man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his buddies.

4: Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours.

5: If you’ve known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever unless you actually marry her.

6: Moaning about the brand of free beer in a buddy’s fridge is forbidden. However complain at will if the temperature is unsuitable.

7: No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your buddy’s birthday is strictly optional. At that point, you must celebrate at a strip bar of the birthday boy’s choice.

8: On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest.

9: When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who’s playing.

10: You may flatulate in front of a woman only after you have brought her to climax. If you trap her head under the covers for the purpose of flatulent entertainment, she’s officially your girlfriend.

11: It is permissible to drink a fruity alcohol drink only when you’re sunning on a tropical beach… and it’s delivered by a topless model and only when it’s free.

12: Only in situations of mortal and/or physical peril are you allowed to kick another guy in the nuts.

13: Unless you’re in prison, never fight naked.

14: Friends don’t let friends wear Speedos. Ever. Issue closed.

15: If a man’s fly is down, that’s his problem, you didn’t see anything.

16: Women who claim they “love to watch sports” must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to drink as much as the other sports watchers.

17: A man in the company of a hot, suggestively dressed woman must remain sober enough to fight.

18: Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both, that’s just greedy.

19: If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you’d better be talking about his choice of beer.

20: Never join your girlfriend or wife in discussing a friend of yours, except if she’s withholding sex pending your response.

21: Phrases that may NOT be uttered to another man while lifting weights: a) Yeah, Baby, Push it! b) C’mon, give me one more! Harder! c) Another set and we can hit the showers!

22: Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal footing: i.e., both urinating, both waiting in line, etc. For all other situations, an almost imperceptible nod is all the conversation you need.

23: Never allow a telephone conversation with a woman to go on longer than you are able to have sex with her. Keep a stopwatch by the phone. Hang up if necessary.

24: The morning after you and a girl who was formerly “just a friend” have carnal, drunken monkey sex, the fact that you’re feeling weird and guilty is no reason for you not to nail each other again before the discussion occurs about what a big mistake it was.

25: It is acceptable for you to drive her car. It is not acceptable for her to drive yours.

26: Thou shalt not buy a car in the colors of brown, pink, lime green, orange or sky blue.

27: The girl who replies to the question “What do you want for Christmas?” with “If you loved me, you’d know what I want!” gets an Xbox. End of story.

28: There is no reason for guys to watch Ice Skating or Men’s Gymnastics. Ever.

We’ve all heard about people having guts or balls. But do you really know the difference between them? In an effort to keep you informed, the definition of each is listed below:

“GUTS” is arriving home late after a night out with the guys, being assaulted by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to say, “are you still cleaning or are you flying somewhere?”

“BALLS” is coming home late after a night out with the guys smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the ass and having the balls to say, “You’re next!”

We hope this clears up any confusion,

The International Council of Manhood, Ltd.


Friends or best friends

FRIENDS: Never ask anything to eat or drink
BEST FRIENDS: Help themselves and is the reason you never have any food

FREINDS: Call your parents Mr. Mrs. and grandma and grandpa
BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents MOM and DAD GRAMPS AND GRANDPA

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail
BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you saying, "DAMN that was fun."

FRIENDS: Never seen you cry
BEST FRIENDS: Won't tell anyone else you cry...just laugh about it when you're not down anymore

FRIENDS: Ask you to write down you number
BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff and gives it back a few days later
BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you
BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography about your life

FRIENDS: Wonders about your romantic history.
BEST FRIENDS: Could blackmail you with it.

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that's what everyone else is doing
BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowd asses that left you

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door
BEST FRIENDS: Would walk right in and say, "I'M HOME!"

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell
BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell

FRIENDS: Will comfort you when your love rejects you.
BEST FRIENDS: Will go up and ask: "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"

FRIENDS: Will be there for you when your love breaks up with you.
BEST FRIENDS: Will call and whisper: "Seven days..."

FRIENDS: Helps you up when you fall.
BEST FRIENDS: Keeps on walking saying: "Walk much, dumb ass?"

FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince.
BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you.

FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying.
BEST FRIENDS: Will hand you a Kleenex and ask you “Who do I have to kill?”

FRIENDS: Will offer you a soda.
BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you.

FRIENDS: Will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month.
BEST FRIENDS: Will throw you a tampon and push you in.

FRIENDS: Gives you their umbrella in the rain.
BEST FRIENDS: Takes yours and says, "Run - beep - run!"

FRIENDS: Will help you move.
BEST FRIENDS: Will help you move the bodies.

FRIENDS: Convinces you not to jump off the cliff.
BEST FRIENDS: Hugs you "Goodbye, I'll miss you. Can I have your I-pod?"

FRIENDS: Are through high school/college
BEST FRIENDS: Are for life

FRIENDS: Will ignore this
BEST FRIENDS: Will repost this


A: Hot
B: Loves people
C: A great kisser
D: Makes people laugh
E: Has gorgeous eyes
F: People wild and crazy adore you
G: Very outgoing
H: Easy to fall in love with
I: Loves to smile and laugh
J: Really sweet
K: Really silly
L: Smile to die for
M: Makes dating fun
N: Can kick the shit out of you
O: Has one of the best personalities ever
P: Popular with all types of people
Q: A hypocrite
R: Good boyfriend/girlfriend
S: Cute
T: A very good kisser
U: Is very sexual
V: Not judgemental
W: Very broad minded
X: Never let people tell you what to do
Y: Is loved by everyone
Z: Can be funny and dumb at times

My name is awesome according to this.


The following is supposedly an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well.

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.

As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different Religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.

With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I go out with you", and take into account the fact that I went out with her last night, then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over.

The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct . . . leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A."


Anime jokes and stuffs:

Your '...' jokes: naruto style

Your '...' is so ugly, not even Naruto can believe it!
Your '...' is so fat, not even the Byakugan can see through him/her!
Your '...' is so stupid, he/she took a shit thinking it would open the 8 inner gates!
Your '...' is so old, Gai dropped his 'Power of youth' philosophy on the spot!
Your '...' is so ugly, when he/she passed by Hinata, Hinata yelled 'Daaayuummmmm!'
Your '...' is so ugly, Itachi felt like his eyesight was diminishing when he saw him/her!
Your '...' is so ugly, he/she made Jiraiya too scared to peek again when he saw him/her!
Your '...' is so fat, he/she made fun of Chouji saying he was 'skin and bones'!
Your '...' is so ugly, Kakashi voluntarily gave him/her his mask!
Your '...' is so stupid, he/she couldn't find any of the 'hidden' villages!
Your '...' is fat, it took a whole beach for Gaara to use his Sand Coffin on him/her!
Your '...' is so ugly, the Nine-tails fled in fear!
Your '...' is so ugly, it's forbidden just to transform into him/her!
Your '...' is so fat, Tazuna considered using him/her as the bridge to the mainland!
Your '...' is so ugly, When Orochimaru saw him/her, he suddenly felt good about himself!
Your '...' is so fat, not even Zabuza's sword could cut through him/her in one hit!
Your '...' is so ugly, when the other girls saw him/her, they all ran for Lee!

Don't do this: Naruto style

Don't tell Sasuke that Chicken Little wants his ass back.

Don't ask Kakashi to perform Lightning Blade while standing on a power line

Don't tell Tenten that Neji cut his hair

Do not put carnivorous plants around the Aburame household

Don't call the dog catcher on Akamaru

Don't try and give Kiba a flea bath

Don't tell Sakura to rent her forehead out as a billboard advertising space

Don't give Gai a cape and cowl

Don't ask Orochimaru to do the moonwalk

Do not sprinkle salt on Tsunade's slug

Do not ask Gamakichi or Gamatastu to run across a busy intersection

Do not give Enma barrels to throw

Hip Hop Harry is never to be summoned again

I will not try to deepfry Tonton

Jiraiya's alter-ego is not Master Roshi

Ebisu is not Jiraiya's secret pervy apprentice

I will not burn trees and blame it on Sasuke

I will not compare the Lightning Blade to a certain yellow mouse

I will not throw water balloons at Gaara

I will not replace Karasu's poison bombs with stink bombs

I will not paint Choji red and ask him to run around yelling "Oh Yeah!"

I will not ask Kisame to eat Sharkfin Soup

I will not summon Gamakichi to rid my home of flies

I will not pluck Lee's eyebrows and give them to Gaara

I will not call Gaara a momma's boy

I will not ask Tenten for swordchucks

I will not tape a "Kick Me" sign to Neji's blindspot

Never call anyone in the Hyuga Clan Mr. or Mrs. H

Do not give Gai a cape

Do not give Lee a Flash costume

Do not dump water on Konan

Do not ask Kurenai if she drinks Asuma's blood

It is unwise to ask Anko to tie you up.

Do not call Tsunade the Wicked Witch of Konoha

Similarly, do not call Shizune or Sakura Dorothy

Do not ask Shizune for acupuncture

Do not yell Clone Dogpile around Kiba

Do not read Jiraiya's books, lest you lose your innocence

Do not spoil said books' ending to Kakashi Hatake

Do not call the Third Hokage a dirty old man

Do not use Rasengan to stir food

Do not use Chidori to jumpstart a machine

Never try and ask Shino what's under his glasses

Similarly, never ask Kakashi what is under his mask

Do not hang flypaper or bug zappers around the Aburame Manor

Do not use Fire Style Jutsu in place of fireworks.

For my sake and yours, do not ever call Tsunade an old woman

Kakashi cannot summon Snoopy, so stop asking

Similarly, Kakashi cannot summon Scooby or Scrappy Doo.

Jiraiya cannot summon a being known as Frogger

Orochimaru is not to be referred to as Michael Jackson, even if he does like little boys

Similarly, do not call Tsunade Big Momma

Kisame Hoshigaki is not to be called a failed movie experiment

It is unwise to yell "fire in the hole" when Deidara is present

Just because Naruto Uzumaki has done most of these things doesn't mean you should too.


You KNOW you're obsessed with Naruto when:

1! You make a leaf village head protector!

2! You actually take the time to learn the jutsu hand motions!

3! Every time you put your glasses on you whisper 'Sharingan!'!

4! You are a girl and dye your hair pink to get the 'Natrually Sakura' look!

5! You want people to refer to you as 'The 6th hokage'

6! You keep butter knives in your pocket and call them kunais!

7! You drew the Uchiha clan symbol on the back of your new jean jacket!

8! You name your dog Akumaru!

9! You throw sand at people while etching the symbol for 'Love' in Japanese on the side of your forehead! (Don't forget the eyeliner!!)

10! You ask the chicken you ate last night to lend you some chakra!

11! You let a rabid snake bite you, hoping to get the seal

12! Dye your hair blonde and try to walk up a tree.

13! Live by a strict diet of only ramen.

14! Call your semester examine a chuunin exam.

15! Trade in your favorite hat for a forehead protector.

16! Roll your eyes back in your head and shout "byakugan".

17! Copy every thing a person does and claim it's your bloodline.

18! Stay up all night waiting for the release of the next manga chapter.

19! Start adding the words chan and kun on the end of your friends names.

20! Paste a piece of paper that says "come come paradise" on the front of adult books.

21! Jump off a cliff and attempt to use Kuchiyose No Jutsu to summon the toad king.

22! Keep all your money in a frog shaped wallet.

23! Memorize the 64 points of Ninpou.

24! Stick your hand in a electric box and scream "chidori" as you pass out.

25! Join a website and use the name Neji as your s/n.

26! Start to call your teachers Sennin.

27! Claim your going to kill your best friend so you can have a better Sharigan.

28! Sit in your local book store and read the manga all day.

29! When someone ask you who your dream girl is and you say Ino.

30! Agree to stay up and write this list so you can be added to the staff of Naruto Central.

31! Spend your week searching down Naruto sites.

32! Refuse a date because your saving yourself for Sakura.

33! Graduate high school and proclaim yourself as an Anbu.

34! Cry at the flash back scenes of Sasuke's family.

35! Try to hit Itachi through the screen when he tortures Sasuke.

36! Put a picture of Hinata in your wallet and tell your friends it's your girlfriend.

37! List Anbu as current occupation on a job application.

38! Can spout out a random character quote on command.

39! Draw symbols on a scroll and try to seal a whole in a wall with it.

40! Sneak around and try to beat your grandfather.

41! Wake up in the middle of the night and scream "Itachi why?!".

42! Eat all day and all night, and then try to roll into a ball and run someone down.

43! Get bit by a snake and decide stabbing the wound is a good idea.

44! Read manga 24 hours nonstop just so you can read more.

45! Decide that if you can't hit a tree 1500 times then you'll jump rope 1500.

46! Decide to call your moral code your "ninja way".


Professor Flitwick … does not know where Snow White is.

Professor Snape … has no wish to get in touch with his ‘feminine side’.

Professor Lupin … has no need for a flea collar. Ever.

Professor Moody … the best ‘teaching’ Hoqwarts has seen in a while.

Professor McGonagall … does not take herself too seriously. It is a bad idea to tell her.

Professor Dumbledore … should be referred to as ‘Professor’, ‘Headmaster’ or ‘Sir’, not ‘Dude’, ‘My Leige’ or ‘Tim the Enchanter’.

Harry Potter … is more Emo than Draco Malfoy.

Draco Malfoy … disagrees.

Hermione Granger … has PMS and a wand.

Ron Weasley … is very afraid.

Luna Lovegood … is perfectly sane, thanks very much.

Ginny Weasley … wants her Hogwarts toilet seat.

Fred Weasley … knows if he and his twin giggle at an idea for more than fifteen seconds, they may assume that it’s against the rules and therefore should not carry it out.

George Weasley … knows he and his twin will carry it out and are not remotely sorry.

Lily Evans … swears she is not in love with James Potter.

James Potter … doesn’t believe her.

Remus Lupin … would prefer less jokes about ‘his time of the month’.

Sirius Black … killed by drapery.

Andromeda Black … is going to marry a muggle – screw the consequences.

Bellatrix Black … is quietly going insane.

Narcissa Black … would like a new hairbrush.

Lucius Malfoy … does not like to be referred to as ‘Luscious Mouthful’.

Voldemort … does not think it would be funny if HP were to put on earmuffs and pulled out a mandrake in his presence.

Gryffindors … will jump off a cliff.

Slytherins … will push someone else off.

Hufflepuffs… will call five hundred others and build a staircase.

Ravenclaws … will get hold of a flying carpet.


Great 'Draco Malfoy' jokes.

First time at Hogwarts.

By Szordara "Harry Potter and the Harem of Honeys".

"Who are you?" blondie finally asked. He had restrained his curiousity until they were exiting onto the docks. "What's your family name?" Man, this kid was like a parody of a stereotypical snob!

"Someone who doesn't care to respond to rude little albino arseholes like yourself," countered Harry, not bothering to look at blondie when he replied.

"How dare you! Do you have any idea who my father is?" raged blondie.

"The only arsehole bigger than you?" Most of the children around them easily heard that response, and laughed at blondie's flushed expression. Deciding to push the envelope a bit, Harry adopted a tone of false concern. "Oh, I'm terribly sorry! Were you seriously trying to find out who your father actually is? Have you been searching for years for the stupid git who sired you into this world? I hadn't realized you were literally a bastard." The others could barely keep the grins off their faces.

"I know who my father is!" shrieked the boy. "His name is Lucius Malfoy!" The other students sniggered with mirth. Blondie had throbbing veins on his forehead.

"Then why the bloody hell are you asking me who he is?" scoffed Harry. "Wait a sec... are you a bit slow in the head? Is that why Tweedledee and Tweedledum here are escorting you everywhere? Did your father pay them to help keep an eye on you?" Most of the first years were now laughing so hard they were in tears.

"I am not slow in the head!" Blondie's voice became shriller and shriller as he got worked up.

"You yell like a girl, blondie," he stated quietly. "Oh! Now I see where this is going... Sorry, but I don't go that way. I like girls."

Blondie's head was seconds away from exploding. "I'M NOT GAY!"

"Come now, denial isn't good for anybody. There's no shame in being gay, blondie. It's all cool. I don't swing that way myself, but I'm sure someday you will find your perfect guy. Just hang in there." The pseudo-bodyguards began to slowly back away from the furious albino, while the onlookers continued to laugh so hard several fell over.

"I'M NOT GAY! YOU HEAR ME? I'M NOT!"

"Like any straight guy spends that much time on his hair and clothes!" smirked Harry. "Well, maybe for a hot date, but you've been with the twins there ever since I first saw you. Do you like the big, strapping lads? Face it, the writing's on the wall, blondie. Hide in the closet all you want, but sooner or later you'll have to come out and face yourself."

"I AM NOT A HOMOSEXUAL, YOU STUPID BLOODY GIT!"


"Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss." - Douglas Adams

"The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." -Albert Einstein

"Power corrupts, absolute power corupts absolutely." -George Orwell

'When life gives you lemons, make apple juice and laugh as everyone tries to figure out why the hell you did it' - Allyn Night

Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils ... - Louis Hector Berlioz ( so true!)

"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity and I'm not sure about the former." -Albert Einstein

"A day without laughter is a day wasted." - Charlie Chaplin

Love is friendship on fire.

“Don’t follow in my footsteps I tend to walk into walls”

“Logic is a systematic method of coming to the wrong conclusion with confidence.”

Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us how to walk and talk, then the rest of our lives telling us to sit down and shut up.

“Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.”

“I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I only lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three.”

“The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.”

“Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.”

“It takes 42 muscles to frown at the person who is annoying you but only 4 to reach out and bitch slap them”

If Tylenol, duct tape, & a Band Aid can't fix it, you have a serious problem.

My knight in shining armor turned out to be a loser in aluminum.

One day your prince will come. mine? Oh he took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions.

The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then tells you why it's not.

When I'm stressed, I laugh. When I'm happy, I laugh. When I'm nervous, I laugh. If I find something funny, I can't stop laughing.

If ya can't beat 'em, join 'em.
If ya can't join 'em, bribe 'em.
If ya can't bribe 'em, blackmail 'em.
If ya can't blackmail 'em, kill 'em.
If ya can't kill 'em, you're screwed.


Words to live by

Sic vis pacem, para bellum.-

If you want peace, prepare for war

Proin ignoscere
Sed oblitus
Lorem anonymous
Donec a legione
Ut nos

We will never forgive
We will never forget
We are anonymous
We are a legion
Expect us


Story Ideas

A story using Gamer powers based on the VtM system, essentially turning the main character into a Vampire with Disciplines and the choice of which clan they want to belong to.


https : // i . pinimg . com / originals / 5a / ef / d5 / 5aefd5db0ed61b5e8e45f5dbe9556c90 . jpg

Exact image for Krestin Taladriel.

https : // i0 . wp . com / www . fearreview . com / wp-content / uploads / 2018 / 09 / Dragon-Prince-Claudia-Official-min . png?resize=150&ssl=1

The image for Talula Mullosk isn't perfect, but it's the closest I could find for what I want.


Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Dark Souls: Derp Edition by Supreme Gamer reviews
Somehow stuck in dark souls, Kaylen, Oscar and loads more characters go on an incredible journey to change the destiny of the chosen undead. Lost Izalith will become found Izalith, mushroom men will attack and Priscilla's tail will be fondled. Warning: Be prepared to joy puke your face off.
Dark Souls - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 63 - Words: 475,923 - Reviews: 1101 - Favs: 803 - Follows: 899 - Updated: 10/1 - Published: 8/15/2015 - Oscar, Knight of Astora, Anastacia of Astora, Solaire of Astora, OC
Dragonball: RPG Tetralogy by Klldarkness reviews
An average guy, living an average life, dies. He soon discovers that life was a game in Alpha, and he's now being welcomed to the Beta. Join his journey into a world of superpowers, supervillains, and an ever-evolving game world that challenges his views on life and morality. (DB, DBZ, DB GT. DBS, DB Heroes, Super DB Heroes, Xenoverse, Game Powers.) (Books 1, 2, and 3 complete!)
Dragon Ball Z - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 58 - Words: 218,907 - Reviews: 1872 - Favs: 3,553 - Follows: 3,621 - Updated: 9/24 - Published: 7/14/2017 - OC
Uzumaki Naruto: Dawn of the Gamer Remastered by Legend of the Kyuubi reviews
A young Naruto grew up with little to no friends and because of this he developed a love of video games. Little did he know it would result in him waking up with the ability to view life as one. Naruto had no idea what to make of this, but after discovering the perks decided to go with the flow. But will life be harder or easier remains unseen? AU. Naruto/The Gamer/Solo Leveling.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 15 - Words: 161,506 - Reviews: 6360 - Favs: 12,298 - Follows: 14,444 - Updated: 9/22 - Published: 7/16/2011 - Naruto U., Ino Y., Hinata H., Anko M.
The Z Gamer by Zero Rewind reviews
I played video games so much that my own life became a game! Why did I receive this power? And why do I have a quest whose failure penalty is the destruction of the universe? A slow boil adventure, DO NOT READ THIS STORY if you are expecting an emotionless grinding murder hobo.
Dragon Ball Z - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 35 - Words: 144,325 - Reviews: 1211 - Favs: 3,960 - Follows: 4,772 - Updated: 2/18 - Published: 3/15/2019 - [Chi-Chi, OC] Goku, Tien
The Clockwork Empress by Dark Gear reviews
Momonga wasn't the only person to be brought to the New World. What happens when the unseen force has brought in another that it probably shouldn't have? What happens when it brings in... a developer. Fortunately for her, she has a few advantages to give her the edge over any player. Unfortunately for her, she's going to need those advantages, as she doesn't start like Momonga.
Overlord/オーバーロード - Rated: T - English - Fantasy - Chapters: 39 - Words: 713,181 - Reviews: 677 - Favs: 1,289 - Follows: 1,436 - Updated: 8/12/2020 - Published: 12/31/2018 - Ainz, Albedo, Shalltear B., OC
Contract of the Shinigami by KyuubiGoku reviews
Naruto nearly died at Final Valley, but Fate still wants him alive. The Shinigami finds interest in Naruto and makes Naruto it's first summoner. Watch Naruto as he shows the world what it's like to have the Death God for a summon. Incest warning NaruKushi. Uzumaki Eccentric.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 59 - Words: 735,120 - Reviews: 3044 - Favs: 8,094 - Follows: 7,294 - Updated: 8/25/2019 - Published: 5/13/2012 - Naruto U., Kushina U.
Might and Magic by Astroman1000 reviews
Little Harry Potter was not the biggest fan of his own life, but what could he possibly do about it? Escaping to play video games in the dark of night helps... but only a little. A Gamer Fic.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Adventure - Chapters: 18 - Words: 106,322 - Reviews: 1258 - Favs: 4,122 - Follows: 5,203 - Updated: 7/14/2019 - Published: 6/10/2018 - Harry P., N. Tonks
Dragon Chronicles 1: Muggle-Raised Champion by Stargon1 reviews
The day before Harry Potter was due to go to Hogwarts for the very first time, his aunt and uncle informed him that he wouldn't be going. Instead, he was sent to Stonewall High. Now, three years later, the Goblet of Fire has named him as a TriWizard Champion. What that means is anyone's guess, but to Harry, one thing is clear: he can finally get away from Privet Drive.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 33 - Words: 122,377 - Reviews: 2489 - Favs: 7,463 - Follows: 5,818 - Updated: 6/5/2019 - Published: 11/11/2015 - Harry P., Daphne G. - Complete
The Remnant Gamer by flameclawsxx reviews
What happens when you wake up in a forest that is in another dimension with a small text box saying that you are 'The Gamer? You sit down and accept your fate. (Self Insert) (Si/Oc) (MUCH BETTER re-write available)
RWBY - Rated: M - English - Adventure - Chapters: 57 - Words: 205,778 - Reviews: 1454 - Favs: 1,704 - Follows: 1,818 - Updated: 11/3/2018 - Published: 2/19/2018 - [OC, Neo, Ruby R.] Yang X.L.
Code Geass: Lelouch of the Six Paths: Redux by EternalKnight219 reviews
This is another version of my hit story. No I am not discontinuing the original. What if Lelouch has the Rinnegan? This begins a little before R2. Lelouch X Kallen X HAREM!. I really suck at summaries so read inside.
Code Geass - Rated: M - English - Adventure - Chapters: 11 - Words: 31,886 - Reviews: 139 - Favs: 382 - Follows: 314 - Updated: 10/8/2012 - Published: 2/9/2011 - Lelouch L., Kallen S. - Complete
My Unconventional Mask by AGuyWhoUsedToWrite reviews
Living day by day as a pretender, Uzumaki Naruto was known as the scorn of Konoha; cast aside by society. Their actions eventually led to the creation of a mask but what happens when that mask starts to crack? A Hanabi x Naruto story.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 50,580 - Reviews: 322 - Favs: 693 - Follows: 875 - Updated: 9/4/2012 - Published: 2/16/2009 - Naruto U., Hanabi H.
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

5e Gamer reviews
An orphan who managed to make something of his life after winning the biggest Powerball jackpot ever, a billion dollars, dies saving a little girl from a kidnapper. Interested by him, an entity known as The System decides to grant him access to The Gamer, allowing him to live out his dream of living in the world of Dungeons and Dragons, his favorite game. Let's see how that goes.
Crossover - Misc. Anime/Manga & Dungeons and Dragons - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 3 - Words: 33,572 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 117 - Follows: 129 - Updated: 11/12/2019 - Published: 11/3/2019
A Frozen Heart reviews
The Saiyans have made a mockery of the Frost Demons for the last time. Taking the best genetic strands from their strongest warriors, they artificially create the perfect Frost Demon, bypassing the usual wait for a normal birth, and design it to look human. To look like a Saiyan. But something goes wrong, and everything is lost. Or is it?
Crossover - Dragon Ball Z & Naruto - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,155 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 40 - Updated: 2/20/2016 - Published: 2/12/2016 - OC
Harry Potter: New Gamer reviews
The night Harry Potter was born, Voldemort killed his parents and tried to kill him, too. But, what if that night, his parents had enough time to try and protect him before they died? What if, they used an ancient, mysterious spell, with an unknown purpose? What if that spell, gave Harry the power of 'The Gamer? Well, let's see how that would impact the Wizarding World.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Manhwa/Korean Comics/만화 - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,985 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 302 - Follows: 405 - Updated: 2/14/2016 - Published: 7/28/2014 - Harry P., Hermione G., Ginny W., Luna L.
A Different Story reviews
We all know Code Lyoko, right? Maybe not everything, but we understand the purpose. Well, what if what we know about it, changed? What if something altered the story? How would that affect things for the Lyoko Warriors? If you're curious about the changes in time, and what caused them, come and witness them.
Code Lyoko - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Mystery - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,509 - Reviews: 3 - Follows: 4 - Published: 4/27/2015 - OC, Milly S.