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Hello. Congratulations! You are not illiterate. This is my profile. If you didn't know that I'm not quite sure how you learned to read. The kinds of fanfictions I like reading are either really funny stories, preferably parodies, or just really well written stories. At the moment I really like the kind of stories where Harry goes back in time and relives his Hogwarts years. If you have found a really good one that isn't on my favorites please message me about it as I am currently on my last one. Or alternatively if you just have a really good fanfic that isn't on my favorites please message me about that too.
Now for some quotes and proverbs
The most commonly used lie is 'I have read and agreed to the terms and conditions'
If life gives you melons you may be dyslexic
An apple a day keeps anyone away if thrown hard enough
I'm a pessimist because everyone knows that frowning uses more muscles than smiling and more muscles means more exercise.
I'm not a therapist, solve your own problems.
May the mass X acceleration be with you.
The only thing we have to fear is fear itself. AND SPIDERS!
Real men don't sparkle. Real men defeat dark wizards!
If zombies chase us I'm tripping you.
Sarcasm is the best thing ever.
Absolute zero. -273.15 is the coolest.
I'm not afraid of the dark. I'm afraid of the ninjas that hide in the dark.
If it wasn't for law enforcement and physics I'd be unstoppable!
The shin-bone: a device for finding furniture in a dark room.
46.536% of all statistics are made up on the spot.
And now for some random stuff I found on some peoples profiles
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!
90% of teens would cry if the Justin Bieber was on the Empire State Building about to jump.
If you're in the 10% who would grab a chair and some popcorn and yell " Jump idiot, jump!"
Post this in your profile!
The "Friday" song is about the JFK assassination. The driver of the car he was assassinated in's name was Samuel Kickin (Kickin in the front seat, sittin in the back seat). The assassination occurred on a Friday, and when he was shot the Secret Service yelled at Jackie Kennedy to "get down" (got to get down on Friday). Parts about the cold war and the spread of Communism are also reflected (everybody's Russian) and to top it all off, in the hotel that morning JFK declined a breakfast of sausage eggs and toast for a bowl of Bran Flakes instead (got to have my bowl-got to have my cereal). Also, the following Monday JFK was supposed to sign a bill into law requiring all public schools to provide bus transportation for their students, (Got to catch my bus).
My petition to ban dihydrogen monoxide
There is a dangerous chemical called dihydrogen monoxide that is widely used in industry. I am part of a petition to ban it.
Is called "hydroxyl acid", the substance is the major component of acid rain.
Contributes to the "greenhouse effect".
Is fatal if inhaled.
Contributes to the erosion of our natural landscape.
Accelerates corrosion and rusting of many metals.
May cause electrical failures and decreased effectiveness of automobile brakes.
Has been found in excised tumors of terminal cancer patients.
Despite the danger, dihydrogen monoxide is often used:
As an industrial solvent and coolant.
In nuclear power plants.
In the production of Styrofoam.
As a fire retardant.
In many forms of cruel animal research.
As an additive in certain "junk-foods" and other food products.
Please add this to your profile to spread awareness of this danger.