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Joined 11-16-02, id: 295256
Author has written 8 stories for Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Harry Potter, Red Dwarf, and Discworld.

Semi-regular updates. And the question is, 'Name something Spooky Cactus never does.' I am, however, writing. I wish I could add music to Blues, I really do. I know exactly how I'd play it. Think 'Contemplation' with a few more fiddly bits. Anyway. I think I'm supposed to say who I am here, so I'll summarize for you; over two thousand years ago a desert tribe, for all of half an hour, worshipped a rather menacing saguaro as a god. Although the tribe soon moved on, the tiny spark of life they created in the cactus lived on. It became a demon by the name of Spook-y'Cactus, a rather docile one as demons went who much preferred annoying people to disembowelling them, and consisted of more semi-bitter sarcasm and unwarranted melodrama than evil. Unfortunately it annoyed the wrong wizard, and was trapped in a small potted cactus for two thousand years. After this spell of abject boredom, the much-weakened spirit of the demon inhabited the body of a teenage girl in England, and I, Spooky Cactus, was created. As befits a Cactus-Demon, I spend my time doing many of the things the human known as Jack Chick deems sinful, such as reading and writing fantasy, fanfiction and slash, playing computer games, playing RPGs, listening to and playing old blues, jazz, swing, Beatles and 80's music studying philosophy and generally anything fun or indicative of imagination and independant thought.

I'll have bored you by now, but please read something before you leave. Insert review-whoring comment here.


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Blues reviews
Based on Discworld Noir. Lewton has a bone to pick with Vimes - and maybe that's a rather appropiate metaphor. He's just another part of those old days. Implied slash. (Up to chapter 3)
Discworld - Rated: K+ - English - Supernatural - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,238 - Reviews: 6 - Updated: 3/18/2005 - Published: 3/4/2005
What Probably Didn't Happen Next reviews
Ace meets Random. Rimmer (briefly) is a sausage. Death wants revenge. Lister is the Chosen One. Random, a male princess and Zaphod Beeblebrox quest with Ace to find the true Ruler of the Multiverse... who is definitely not a ham sandwich. Slashy when I ge
Red Dwarf - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 3 - Words: 4,141 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 1 - Updated: 9/19/2004 - Published: 6/5/2004
Ace Rimmer, Keeping up Appearances reviews
Ace Rimmer's inner thoughts. Depressing in manner of Marvin the Paranoid Android. My first Red Dwarf fic. Sort of implied ifyoulookatittherightway could possibly be seen as hinting towards ListerRimmer.
Red Dwarf - Rated: K - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,291 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 1 - Published: 5/30/2004 - Rimmer, A. - Complete
Zaphod Beeblebrox, Keeping up Appearances reviews
What does Zaphod really think about himself? Angsty, in an 'inner-turmoil' way rather than an 'unrequited love' way. This is my first go at this kind of fanfic, so please tell me what you think!
Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Rated: K - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,033 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 1 - Published: 5/23/2004
The Exceedingly Funky Guide to the Galaxy reviews
Prolouge to a alternate version of the Guide. Reveiw and tell me if I should continue.
Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Rated: K - English - Humor/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 1 - Words: 392 - Reviews: 19 - Published: 7/2/2003
Omphaloskepis reviews
Omphaloskepis! What is Omphaloskepis? A new lesson at Hogwarts taught only by Professor Shade! I'll warn you now, I don't like Harry Potter....
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 903 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 7/2/2003 - Harry P. - Complete
Falling Out of the Sky reviews
Now, we learned in WHN that Arhtur has a highly improbable aura. But where did he get it from? And why didn't he disappear like Fenchurch, as he is also from a plural zone? Find out...
Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Rated: K - English - Sci-Fi/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 723 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 6/28/2003
Council of Colours reviews
Just a short, essentially pointless piece about the overwhelming sense of peace brought about by the last part of Mostly Harmless with Arthur Dent in it.
Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Rated: K+ - English - Sci-Fi - Chapters: 1 - Words: 437 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 6/17/2003 - Complete