The Internet Wanderer
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Joined 06-09-11, id: 2978005, Profile Updated: 05-08-12
Author has written 2 stories for Harvest Moon.

Hey! The Internet Wanderer Here! But to save time (and time is money so we’re saving some of that too!) let’s just call us I.W.

Here at I.W.’s headquarters, safety is our number one concern. That is why the walking techbanes that claim to be my friends and work here with me aren’t allowed to touch the computer. Unfortunately, stick a bunch of rowdy teenagers into one room and something bad is bound to happen to the sole computer in said room, i.e. mine.

Despite the constant technical difficulties and annoyances these people may be and cause, there are my best friends, I love them dearly, and because of the You’re-stuck-with-us-so-like-it-or-not-you-better-get-used-to-us attitude that surrounds this prison cell of a room, I have learned to deal with them. Without the use of my dear tennis racket in the closet. That is huge accomplishment.

Well, without further ado, let’s meet the rest of the people here at I.W.’s headquarters.

Scarlett- The owner and operator of The Internet Wanderer; loves horror, but has a soft spot for romance; self-appointed head and editor of the school newspaper and yearbook for the school year of 2011-2012 (which is good because apparently half of them are incapable of spelling ‘biggest’ - no joke, I have last year’s yearbook to prove it, there are so many typos you wouldn’t even believe it - let alone the names of every facility member, student, and activity on campus); enjoys playing “Fallout 3” “Fallout New Vegas” American McGee’s Alice” “Pokemon” series and “Harvest Moon” series in her spare time; likes to pace when thinking of ideas; enjoys the thought of the impossible and paranormal; favorite ice cream flavor is chocolate ship cookie dough from Baskin Robbins; and prefers Pepsi over Coke

Current Favorite Real-Life Quote: "I'm in a canoe halfway across the Atlantic Ocean on my way to London, where I'm going to ride into the Buckingham Palace on a zebra and kidnap the Queen of England. You're sitting three seats away from me in the middle of math class. What do you think I'm doing?!" ~Lauren, to Frankie via text message

Current Favorite Media Quote: “Because if I look up and I see one of these things hanging up in my tree I'd go 'Darling, fetch the battleaxe!' Nothing at all like 'Darling, where's the nearest carrot at? Let's feed this thing so it gets BIGGAH!' " ~The 60SR's World's Biggest Bug via Youtube

Frankie- The un-official official leader of the remaining “members” of I.W.; thoroughly enjoys slasher movies and scoffs at any and every bit of romance the media has to offer - be it movies, music, TV shows, or on the Internet; enjoys parading around the yard in his boxers and cooks stark naked (almost every person in the building has had the -ahem- pleasure…of walking in on this); was given detention for throwing an apple at a fellow student (missing and hitting the wall instead--there’s still a mark there) during his English Lit. class; can’t sit still for more than 5 minutes at a time; and prefers Irish Mint-flavored frozen yogurt (iTopit’s of course) over ice cream; and prefers Coke over Pepsi

Current Favorite Real-Life Quote: “I have a new disease. It's called "F*ck Off, I'm Sick." Side effects include headaches, upset stomach, stuffy and runny nose, coughing, and being an overall ray of f*cking sunshine." ~Lauren, to idiot girl in class

Current Favorite Media Quote: “For once in your life, be a man and SHIT IN THAT BOOT!” ~Wilfred

Carlos- The only member of I.W. who hates soda, ice cream, frozen yogurt, pizza, and cake; has been told on numerous occasions that he is “Un-American” because he doesn’t know “The Star-Spangled Banner” “My Country ‘Tis of Thee” or “Amazing Grace”; is the most childish member, still thoroughly enjoying Spongebob Squarepants whenever it comes on, but is easily one of the most loveable.

Current Favorite Real-Life Quote: “I'm sick. Legally, I can do whatever the hell I want." ~Scarlett, to Carlos

Current Favorite Media Quote: “Hey! Can I try on that hat? I think it’s important! I think it’s important that-that I try on the hat!” ~The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy

Lauren- The most amazing gothic lesbian you’d ever meet. Can be rude, arrogant, crude, talk down to people on occasion, and lacks a censor button [as “The Mighty Clit-oris (a dinosaur named after…well you know…) might provide an example of, but once someone gets to know her, she is uber sweet. Enjoys reading “Johnny The Homicidal Maniac” “Naruto” and such with her free time and enjoys cuddling her friends when she’s in the right kind of mood. Prefers Pepsi to Coke and chocolate instead of ice cream or frozen yogurt.

Current Favorite Real-Life Quote: “Jesus Scarlet, who crapped in your cornflakes?” ~Frankie, to Sick-Scarlett

Current Favorite Media Quote: "Think of that sensation as reassurance that you are not dead yet." ~Johnny The Homicidal Maniac

I love Simple Plan because they're songs are reality. They're a voice for many people who can't speak out or express how they feel. They speak the truth. They don't talk about sex, drugs, violence, and alcohol. They talk about life. Reality. What really goes on in many people's lives behind closed doors. They speak for me. They say things I can't say, and I think I'm speaking for many other's when I say this; Thank you for speaking the truth because to many it's a foreign language.

32 Undeniable Truths for Mature Humans

1. I think part of a best friend’s job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you’re wrong.

3. I totally take back all those times I didn’t want to nap when I was younger.

4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.

5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

6. Was learning cursive really necessary?

7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I’m pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

9. I can’t remember the last time I wasn’t at least kind of tired.

10. Bad decisions make good stories.

11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren’t going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don’t want to have to restart my collection…again.

13. I’m always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I did not make any changes to.

14. “Do not machine wash or tumble dry” means I will never wash this – ever.

15. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? f*@k it!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voice mail. What did you do after I didn’t answer? Drop the phone and run away?

16. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

17. I keep some people’s phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

18. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

19. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.

20. I wish Google Maps had an “Avoid Ghetto” routing option.

21. Sometimes, I’ll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the heck was going on when I first saw it.

22. I would rather try to carry 10 over-loaded plastic bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.

23. The only time I look forward to a red light is when I’m trying to finish a text.

24. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

25. How many times is it appropriate to say “What?” before you just nod and smile because you still didn’t hear or understand a word they said?

26. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!

27. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.

28. Is it just me or do high school kids get dumber and dumber every year?

29. There’s no worse feeling than that millisecond you’re sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.

30. As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate bicyclists.

31. Sometimes I’ll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

32. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey – but I’d bet my @$$ everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time!

Grammar is important: It's the difference between 'knowing your shit' and 'knowing you're shit'

Capitalization is the difference between helping your Uncle Jack off a horse and helping your Uncle jack off a horse.

Mary had a little Lamb, His fleece was white as snow. And everywhere that Mary went, that Lamb was sure to go. He followed her to school one day, t'wasn't even in the rule. It made the children laugh and play, to have a Lamb at school. And then the rules all changed one day, illegal it became; To bring the Lamb of God to school, or even speak His name! Every day got worse and worse, and days turned into years. Instead of hearing children laugh, we heard gunshots and tears. What must we do to stop the crime that's in our schools today? Let's the Lamb come back to school, and teach our kids to pray.

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1.YOUR NOBODY NAME (take all the letters of your first name, mix them around and put an "x" where you think it should go):

Scarlett: Teltxscar (Awesome!)

Frankie: Raxfiek (Pimpin’)

Carlos: Loscarx (Sweeeet!)

Lauren: Narelux (Kick ass!)

2. YOUR GANGSTA NAME (first 3 letters of real name plus -izzle):

Scarlett: Scaissile (…Sure why not)

Frankie: Fraizzle (The heck?!)

Carlos: Carizzle (Meh, s’okay)

Laruen: Larizzle (Chill)

3. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME (favorite color and favorite animal):

Scarlett: Golden Dormouse (Haha)

Frankie: Crimson Wolverine (Badass)

Carlos: Maroon Porcupine (*giggles*)

Lauren: Violet Tiger (All right!)

4. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME (middle name, and current street name):

Scarlett: Elizabeth Marshall (We’re all related!)

Frankie: Antonio Marshall (Not too bad)

Carlos: Diego Marshall (Mine sounds weird)

Lauren: Alexis Marshall (Mine sounds normal)

5. YOUR STAR WARS NAME (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name, first 3 letters of mom's maiden name:

Scarlett: Ellscles (Hmm)

Frankie: Monfrmir (Sounds French)

Carlos: Sancaflo (Sounds SPANISH)

Laruen: Esclaram (Reminds me of Oblivion)

6. YOUR SUPERHERO NAME (2nd favorite color, favorite drink):

Scarlett: Scarlet Nuka-Cola (Hurray Fallout 3!)

Frankie: Silver Sunset Sarsaparilla (Fallout New Vegas all the way!)

Carlos: Forest Green Mineral Water (Bleh, soda)

Lauren: Royal Blue Dr. Pepper (Kewl)

7. YOUR ARAB NAME (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, any letter of your middle name, 2nd letter of your mom’s maiden name, 3rd letter of you dad’s middle name, 1st letter of a sibling’s first name, last letter of your mom’s middle name):

Scarlett: Claebas (How do you pronounce that!?)

Frankie: Rnaiwla (The hell is this?!)

Carlos: Andlsas (Better than your guys’!)

Lauren: Aclanda (Reminds me of that terror…never mind)

8. YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME (mothers middle name, dad's middle name (boy: Dad's first, girl: Mom's first)):

Scarlett: Rosaline Robert (Cool!)

Frankie: Edward Penelope (Hate my last name)

Carlos: Rosales Luis (Pronounced “Loo-ece”)

Lauren: Amanda Leonardo (Once again-it sounds normal...well not really)

9. YOUR GOTH NAME (black, and the name of one of your pets):

Scarlett: Black Raven (Damn I'm awesome!)

Frankie: Black Casper (*laughs* The irony...)

Carlos: Black Pumpkin (I like mine!)

Lauren: Black Cheyenne (RIP Cheyenne)

10. YOUR HIPPIE NAME (type your name with your elbow):

Scarlett: Scaszrlreftt (*laughs* I was so off-key)

Frankie: Frasznkmied (Not as bad as I thought)

Carlos: Casrlols (Man…)

Lauren: Laufrden (I got the closest!)


Vanilla Twilight (Harvest Moon)

Writer: Scarlett

Full Summary: Angela has left the island and Gill sits in fields every night, continuing the same nightly ritual of watching the sun rise and missing her dearly.

Main Character(s): Gill & Angela

Genre: Romance

Rating: K+

Status: Completed

The City Is At War (Note: Title subject to change) (Harvest Moon)

Writer: Lauren

Co-writer: Frankie

Full Summary: A storm brought them all together…but they need to finish a war to separate. The residents of Castanet Island are thrown into a new world and meet their “Para-Psyche”, their other- dimensional self. In this dimension, however, lives have been lost and the once-peaceful island has been turned into a no man’s land war zone where two sides reside. The Council--the self-proclaimed leaders of what is left of the island, who want control and for the other to surrender and the Rebels, who just want their lives to go back to normal--an impossible goal--and when both sides are willing to die for their cause, there are casualties. Will you take arms and fight or fall down into the pit of hell with your once-brethren?

Main Character(s): Gill, Candace, Kasey, Kevin, Angela, & Molly

Genre: Adventure/Horror/Tragedy

Rating: T (Note: Rating subject to change)

Status: Discontinued (Temporarily)


Go Ask Alice (Harvest Moon)

Writer: Scarlett

Full Summary: Molly’s been having some trouble lately. She’s been fainting quite a bit and everyone assumes she needs to stop working herself so hard. Until she falls into a coma…Three friends then need to use Wizard’s crystal ball to go into Molly’s “dreams” to pull her out of her coma. But what they didn’t expect is how confusing her mind is, how difficult the “residents” are, and how hard it would be to find her. And even Alice got lost in her own Wonderland…

Main Character(s): Chase, Gill, & Luke

Genre: Fantasy

Rating: None

Status: None

I Watched You Follow In My Footsteps (Fallout 3)

Writer: Scarlett

Full Summary: From the birth of his first born child, till death at Project Purity, he watched her grow from a small infant in the Vault to the “Savior of the Wastes”. He watched her suffer through everything, but she took it in with stride. He thought she threw her life away searching for him, but in the end-he had thrown his away for her. And when she returned the favor for his life’s dream, he couldn’t have been more proud.

Main Character(s): James & Lone Wanderer

Genre: Family

Rating: None

Status: None

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Secrets of a VATS Cameraman by VioletPistol reviews
Stupidity. That's what you need to know about this. Courtesy of the prompt on Falloutkinkmeme: "I want outtakes courtesy of the V.A.T.S camera-man. I want these outtakes to be scenes or simply quotes from funny movies."
Fallout - Rated: M - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 8 - Words: 7,300 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 10/23/2011 - Published: 9/27/2011 - Courier
Famous Last Words by The Konfessionist reviews
The last thoughts of James as he dies before his only child- and he realizes that the last thing he wanted to do was hurt her, but he managed to do so anyways… *one-shot, depressing themes and death of an AMAZING character*
Fallout - Rated: T - English - Angst/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,477 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 1 - Published: 10/20/2011 - James, Lone Wanderer - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The City Is At War reviews
Half of Castanet Island is sent to an alternate reality were they find that their doppelgangers are at war with themselves. They have to get back into their own reality without getting caught in the crossfire, but can they make peace between sides too?
Harvest Moon - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 379 - Reviews: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/1/2011 - Gill, Angela/Akari
Vanilla Twilight reviews
Angela has left the island and Gill sits alone in her fields every night missing her. Sonfic. This is my first fanfic.
Harvest Moon - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,739 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/22/2011 - Angela/Akari, Gill - Complete