You say Twilight I say Harry Potter
In Remembrance to Severus Snape,
In Remembrance to Fred Weasley,
In Remembrance to Dobby,
In Remembrance to Remus J. Lupin,
In Remembrance to Nymphadora Tonks,
In Remembrance to Alastair 'Mad Eye' Moody,
In Remembrance to Tom Marvolo Riddle, A.K.A Voldemort,
In Remembrance to Bellatrix Lestrange,
In Remembrance to Colin Creevey,
In Remembrance to Hedwig,
Things I'm not allowed to do at Hogwarts:
No matter how good a fake Australian accent I can do I will not imitate Steve Irwin during Care of Magical Creatures class
Polishing my wand in the common room is acceptable. “Polishing my wand” in the common room is not.
“Liften Separatis Crotchum” is not a real spell.
If a classmate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of that fact and draw the Dark Mark on their arm.
I will not call the DADA teacher Kenny, even if he is wearing an orange anorak.
I will not bring a Magic Eight Ball to Divination class.
I will stop asking the Arithmancy teacher what the square root of -1 is.
I will not take out a life insurance policy on Harry Potter.
Professor Flitwick’s first name is not Yoda.
When fighting Death Eaters in the annual June battle of Good v. Evil, I
It is inappropriate to slip sample bottles of Selsun Blue into Professor Snape’s personal postbox.I will not put books of muggle fairy tales in the history section of the library.
I will not refer to the Accio charm as “The Force”.
Albus Dumbledore’s proper title is “Headmaster”, not “My Liege”.
I will not tell Professor Trelawney that I foresaw her death.
If the thought of a spell makes me giggle for longer than 15 seconds, I am to assume that I am not allowed to do it.
I am not allowed to introduce Peeves to paintballing.
I will not give Hagrid Pokemon cards and convince him they are real animals.
I will not tell first years that they should build a tree house in the Whomping Willow.
I will not tell first years that Moon Prism Power is a basic Transfiguration spell.
I will never ask Harry if his scar senses are tingling.
I will not scare the Arithmancy students with my Calculus book.
I will not sing “We’re off to see the wizard” when sent to the Headmaster’s office.
The Whomping Willow is not an Entwife.
I shall not give Professor Snape a bottle of shampoo for Christmas.
I may not chase Seamus Finnegan around school in search of his ‘Pot o’ Gold’. Nor am I allowed to tell people he’s a leprechaun on steroids.
I may not refer to Sirius Black as ‘Seriously Black’.
I am not allowed to ask First Years if they need help ‘polishing their wand’. No matter how funny their reactions are.
REASONS TO JOIN THE DARK SIDE (If you wish to join add this list to your profile):
1. We have cookies (last I checked there was hot chocolate, marshmallows, and ice cream too)
To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity
1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.
4. When caught sleeping at school/work/wherever you are not supposed to be sleeping, and you are woken up, shout, "AMEN!"
5.Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.
6.In the Memo Field Of All Your Checks Write: For Marijuana
7.Finish All Your sentences with 'In Accordance With The Prophecy'.
9. Skip down the hall Rather Than Walk and see how many looks you get.
10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
11.Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is 'To Go'.
12. Sing Along At The Opera.
14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and Play Tropical Sounds All Day.
15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You have a headache.
17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream 'I Won! I Won!'
18. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Parking lot, Yelling 'Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!'
19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, 'Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.'
20 And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity ...Copy and Paste this To Make People who read bios Smile.
16 THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART
1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.
Mummy...Johnny brought a gun to school
You know what Mommy
You went to the doctor today.
I can hear that doctor again.
Every Abortion Is Just . . .
One more heart that was stopped.
If you're against abortion, re-post this
Professor Flitwick … does not know where Snow White is.
Professor Snape … has no wish to get in touch with his ‘feminine side’.
Professor Lupin … has no need for a flea collar. Ever!
Professor Moody …presents the best ‘teaching’ Hogwarts has seen in a while.
Professor McGonagall … does not take herself too seriously. It is a bad idea to disagree
Professor Dumbledore … should be referred to as ‘Professor’, ‘Headmaster’ or ‘Sir’, not ‘Dude’, ‘My Leige’ or ‘Tim the Enchanter’.
Harry Potter … is more Emo than Draco Malfoy.
Draco Malfoy … disagrees.
Hermione Granger … has PMS and a wand.
Ron Weasley … is very afraid.
Luna Lovegood … is perfectly sane, thanks very much.
Fred Weasley … knows if he and his twin giggle at an idea for more than fifteen seconds, they may assume that it’s against the rules and therefore should not carry it out.
George Weasley … knows he and his twin will carry it out and are not remotely sorry.
Lily Evans … swears she is not in love with James Potter.
James Potter … doesn’t believe her.
Ginny Weasley...wants her Hogwarts toilet seat.
Remus Lupin … would prefer less jokes about ‘his time of the month’.
Sirius Black … was killed by drapery.
Andromeda Black … is going to marry a muggleborn – screw the consequences!
Bellatrix Black … is quietly going insane.
Narcissa Black … would like a new hairbrush.
Lucius Malfoy … does not like to be referred to as ‘Lucius Mouthful’.
If you hate Racism, Copy this into your profile.
Why School is Hypocritical
1. They tell you to get a good nights sleep, but they make you get up at 6:00 in the morning.
2. They teach you that stress is bad, yet most kids spend hours doing their homework.
3. They want you to do extracurricular activities, but they give you so much to do, you don't have time.
4. Studies show eating slower makes you more full, but lunch periods are shorter then classes (at least at my school).
5. They tell you to be yourself, but they try too conform you to their ways.
If you are Harry Potter obsessed, copy this into you profile and add your name: Ga Nat Nat, Evil Older Sister, Frozenfan, The Choco-Holic, Jade Snape-Holloway, psychotic me, LLAMAS WILL RULE THE WORLD, Ninja C, firelily28, Miss-Ginny-Potter, HPismyhero, fruityloops156, Orion'96, LittleRobinForever, Woodland Spirit,
On Sears hairdryer:
On a bag of Fritos:
On a bar of Dial soap:
On some Swann frozen dinners:
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
On Nytol sleep aid:
On a Korean kitchen knife:
On a string of Christmas lights:
On a food processor:
On Sainsbury's peanuts:
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
On a Swedish chainsaw:
On a child's Superman costume:
I agree when people say girls rule now and 4ever. Copy & paste this in your profile if you agree.
If you believe that there's no reason Christians should hate people practicing Magick, copy and paste this into your profile, and add your name to the list if you actually practice it. RavenclawHermione94, PinkRangerV, QueenoftheSlayers, Woodlandspirit,
If you've ever pushed on a door when it clearly says to pull, paste this into your profile
Your shin (n): a device used to find furniture in the dark
"He who laughs last didn't get it."
You cry, I cry. You laugh, I laugh. You jump off a cliff, I laugh even harder!
-The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then tells you why it's not.
Love me or hate me. Personally I could not care less
-Don't follow in my footsteps . . . I run into walls.
Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way you're a mile away from them and you have their shoes.
If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button.
I'd like to help you out. Which way did you come in?
Don't take life to seriously, no one gets out alive anyway
I stopped fighting my inner demons... We're on the same side now!
It takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 to smile and only 4 to reach out and slap someone.
I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it!
I dream of a better world...where chickens can cross roads without having their morals questioned.
Black and White:
If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vice-versa, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever felt the undeniable urge to slam your head into something, whether it is another person or not copy this into your profile
If you can't remember the last time you wore a dress, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you are odd and proud of it put this on your profile.
If you've ever fallen asleep in a class, paste this to your profile.
If you like/love copying and pasting stuff into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.
I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cell phone or regular phone. I am the girl that hasn't ever been asked out. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things. Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone.: Iheartjake1220, FaerieRose13, Dancer4Life15, Marigold Winters, SparklingTopazEyes, my name is paper YAH, Sakurablossom24, Rhianna224, Kisa T. Sohma, Lone-wolf761,charmed4lifekaren, Princess Marauder, WisdomWriter25, Lady Slytherin of Camelot, WoodlandSpirit,
Re-post this if you think homophobia is wrong.
I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian. I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman. I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights. We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time. I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room. I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me. I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again. I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear. We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men. I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me. I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman. I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman. I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male. I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men. I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that. I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual. I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I didn’t have to always deal with society hating me. I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind. I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love.
If you think that there's nothing wrong with gay marriage, slash, or gay couples, copy and paste this on your profile.
...because good things happen too: I am the guy who came out to the entire school in his senior speech and got a standing ovation for his courage. I am the girl who kisses her girlfriend on the sidewalk and laughs at those who glare. We are the couple who planned and studied and got a damn good lawyer and BEAT the state that wanted to take our child away. We are the ones who took martial arts classes and carry pepper spray and are just too dangerous to gay bash. I am the transgender person who uses the bathroom that suits me, and demands that any complaining staff explain their complaint to my face in front of the entire restaurant--and shares with my other trans friends which restaurants don't raise a stink. I am the mother who told her lesbian daughter to invite her girlfriend over for dinner. I am the father who punished his son for calling you a fag. I am the preacher who told my congregation that love, not hate, is the definition of a true follower of God. I am the girl who did not learn the meaning of "homosexual" until high school but never thought to question why two men might be kissing. I am the woman who argues (quite loudly and vehemently) with the bigots who insist that you do not have the right to marry or raise children. We are the high school class who agrees, unanimously, along with our teacher, that love should be all that matters I am the child who was raised going to gay marriages and civil unions and never saw a difference between the gay marriage and straight marriage. I am making a difference. Hate will not win if we do not let it. If you agree, repost this.
Last Night I was looking up at the stars wondering... where the hell is my ceiling
The trouble with morning is that it comes at such an ungodly hour
I called your boyfriend gay and he slapped me with his purse
Don’t interrupt me when I’m talking to myself
Men are like slinkies. They bring a smile to your face when you push them down the stairs.
You're just jealous the voices only talk to me
Loves a Sensation,
If I throw a stick, will you go away?
I'm not prejudice... I hate everyone equally
If you have EVER yelled at a TV after getting frustrated at someone who can't hear you, put this on your profile.
If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile
PUT THIS IN YOUR PROFILE FOR WORLD DOMINATION! 1010010010010100101010
If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile.
Red heads have the smarts, Blonds get all of the boys, But BURNNETTS GET ALL OF THE BOYS FRIENDS, THE SMARTS, AND WE ARE MOST RELIABLE. copy and paste this to your profile if you are Burnett
Bad spellers of the world UNTIE! If you are a bad speller and proud of it copy this to your profile
If you think those kids should just give the Rabbit his cereal put this in your profile!
Even if you can't see him, God is there. Copy this into your profile if you believe in God
If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this into your profile and add your name to this list: Danyan, Avatarwolf, Shifter-youkai, AkatsukiFan, Chocolate Chan, Staring.out.my.flooded.window, Bloodied Sand,KeraQ, Flame05, Woodland Spirit,
If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, copy this into your profile.
Remember only two defining forces have ever Offered to die for you:
DON'T DO IT;
I went to a birthday party, And remembered what you said. You told me not to drink at all,So I had a Sprite instead. I felt proud of myself, The way you said I would, That I didn't choose to drink and drive, Though some friends said I should. I knew I made a healthy choice and, Your advice to me was right, As the party finally ended, And the kids drove out of sight. I got into my own car, Sure to get home in one piece, Never knowing what was coming, Something I expected least. Now I'm lying on the pavement, And I hear the policeman say, "The kid that caused this wreck was drunk." His voice seems far away. My own blood is all around me, As I try hard not to cry. I can hear the paramedic say, "This girl is going to die. "I'm sure the guy had no idea, While he was flying high, Because he chose to drink and drive, That I would have to die. So why do people do it, Knowing that it ruins lives? But now the pain is cutting me, Like a hundred stabbing knives. Tell sister not to be afraid, Mom Tell daddy to be brave, And when I go to heaven, Put "Daddy's Girl" on my grave. Someone should have taught him, That it's wrong to drink and drive. Maybe if his mom and dad had, I'd still be alive. My breath is getting shorter, I'm getting really scared. These are my final moments, And I'm so unprepared. I wish that you could hold me Mom, As I lie here and die. I wish that I could say, I love you and good-bye.
DON'T DRINK AND DRIVE!
If you too are against drunk driving, add this to your profile and add your name to the bottom. NoOnesGal1848, Sakura-Cherry-Blossom-Chan, AkatsukiDreamer, DeiDei-kunsgirl, purplenekomata, The Crazy Evil Minish Neko, Woodland Spirit,
A guy and a girl were speeding over 100km on a motorcycle.
Girl: Slow down!
Guy: No this is fun!
Girl: No it's not! Please, it's way to scary!
Guy: Then tell me you love me.
Girl: I love you. Now slow down.
Guy: Now give me a big hug.
She gave him a big hug.
Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself? It's bothering me.
In the newspaper, the next day, a motorcycle crashed into a building because of break failure.
Two people were on it and only one survived.
The truth was, that half way down the road the guy realized his breaks were out and he didn't want the girl to know.
Instead, he had her hug him and tell him she loved him one last time. Then he had her put his helmet on so she would live even if it meant he would die.
If you would do the same for the person you love, copy and paste this into your profile
If you’ve your own little world, copy this into your profile.
If you’ve ever stayed up and read past two in the morning, copy this onto your profile.
If you have ever read a 250 pg book in less than one day, copy and paste this into your profile.
65 percent of Teenagers spend more time watching TV rather then read,.If you are part of the 35 percentwho read more that watch TV then cut and paste this to your Profile
If you've ever been on the computer for hours on end OR pulled an all-nighter because you were reading fan fiction, copy this into your profile.
If Fanfiction to you is what Myspace or Facebook is to other people, copy this into your profile.
If you’re obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile
JUST GOT THIS LIST BUT FIGURE IT WOULD HELP!!
AU/AR -- alternate universe/ alternate reality, BD/SM -- bondage/ discipline/ sado-masochism, B-MOD -- body modification (tattoos, scarification, etc), CANON -- follows original book plot, D/S --dominance/ submission, EXHIB -- exhibitionism, FEMM SLASH -- female/ female relationship, FET -- fetish, FLUFF -- cute (much like a 'chick-flick' or in this case a 'chick-fic'), HET -- male/ female relationship, INC -- incest, LEMON -- sexual content (M and NC17) LIME -- mild sexual content (PG13), MPREG -- male pregnancy, N/C or NONCON-- non consensual, forced sex, rape, OC -- original character, OOC -- out of character, PREG -- female pregnancy, PWP -- porn without plot, S&M -- sadism/ masochism, SLASH -- male/ male relationship (also known as 'YAOI'), SH -- sexual harassment, SHOTA -- an older person attracted to someone underage, TORT -- torture, TOYS -- sexual toys, VOY -- voyeurism, VS -- vampire sex, WD -- wet dream, WIP -- work in progress, WAFF--warm and fuzzy feelings, SOLOM--male masturbating, SOLOF--female masturbating, M/C--mind control, SPANK--spankings (duh!), H/C-- hurt and comfort, BEAST--sex with animals, ABORTION--medical termination of a pregnancy, ABUSEabuse of any character, BI--bisexuality, BP--blood play, CBT--cock/ball torture, CR--corruption, DOM--male or female domination, DP--double penetration, FINGERING-- manual manipulation of the clitoris, vagina, vulva, or anus, FIST--fisting, GB--gender bender (a canon character whose gender is changed for the story), HJ--hand job (manual stimulation of partners penis), MBP-- menstrual blood play (GROSS), MC--mind control, M/S--master/slave relationship, MCD--main character death, MICD--minor character death, MINOR1--minor involved (pedophilia under 14), MINOR2--minor involved (under legal age for sex 14-18), NEC--necrophilia, SCAT--poop play, UST--unresolved sexual tension, WS--water sports (urine play),
My mind works like lightning...one brilliant flash and it's gone.
We live in an age where pizza gets to your house before the police.
Eat right, exercise, die anyway.
When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then sit back and let the world wonder how you did it.
I'm not a complete idiot. Some parts are missing.
I want to die peacefully in my sleep like grandfather...not screaming like the passengers in his car.
If you can keep your head while other people are losing theirs, you probably don't fully understand the situation.
They say the truth will set you free. Then why is it every time I tell the truth, I get sent to my room?
I hear voices and they don't like you
Smile -- it confuses the enemy
I used to have super powers, but then my therapist took them away.
Who ever said anything was possible never tried nailing jello to a tree.
"Whoever said nothing is impossible, never tried to slam a revolving door,"- Unknown
"I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no fucking way Paper can beat Rock. Paper is supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? Why the hell cant paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college-ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that paper up in 2 seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my already clenched fist and say "oh shit , I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you, asshole."
When you're right, no one remembers. When you're wrong, no one forgets.
The electric chair was invented by a dentist. If you are scared now more than ever of dentists by learning this fact, put this on your profile.
"There's nothing that can't be fixed with: ducttape, chocolate, or by running it over."
Stress is when you wake up screaming, and then realize that you haven’t fallen asleep yet—Unknown-
End discrimination. Hate everybody—Elle Eden
When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.
How Many Roads Must A Man Walk Down Before He Admits Hes lost?
Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain. Lily Tomlin
'Afraid of a needle, Oh a sadistic vampire, intent on torturing her to death, sure no problem, she runs off to meet him. An IV, on the other hand...' Edward Cullen, Twilight