Author has written 17 stories for Holes, Misc. Books, Misc. Movies, Love Actually, and Harry Potter.
Beena-Pani is a female, more or less, residing in a fairly largecity close to Toronto, with aphysical age that is somewhere in the early teens, while her mental age likes to jump back and forth between4 and 40and, on rare occasions, she acts like an 78-year-old grandmother and makes cookies and has urges to knit and crochet. Sometimes, she makes cookies and has urges to knit and crochet without acting like a 78-year-old grandmother. She also has two pet rats, Beans and Falafel, who like to sit on her keyboard and see how many important documents they can delete by jumping on random keys. Besides those two adorable little rodents, musicals and books are her loves in life. And she never seems to update anymore.
There are many explanations for this. Please select your favourite from the following:
The Romantic Explanation- While at the library and flipping through the Jane Austens once again, she met a nice fellow her age looking at Fahrenheit 451. Not only did he share her love of literature, he enjoyed musicalsand had a place in his heart for Little Shop of Horrors, AND he had a Scottish accent. He looked suspiciously like James Spader, and his eyes were a very interesting colourthey were yellow, which caused part of Beena-Pani's brain to debate over whether this was werewolf-eyes-yellow or serpenty-demon-eyes-yellow for a short while before he revealed that these were contacts. That was okay, though, because he declared undying love for her and gave her chocolate. She has been much too busy doing mushy romantic things with him to post anything.
The Musical-Inspired Explanation- Beena-Pani, who was previously working as a flower girl and could barely use the English language, was taken to a big ol' mansion, where a professor of linguistics hoped to make people believe she was royalty by improving her speech. He failed, so he got her to manage his library, instead. Shortly after starting her new job,a man calling himself Prof Harold Hillarrived in her town, telling people that what their community needed was a boys' band. She was sceptical at first andfound out that he wasn't really a professor, but fell in love with him when he got her lisping little brother to join the band. It turned out that he fell in love with her, too, but he was from a gang that was a rival to the one her brother belonged to. He ended up killing her brother in a fight, but she quickly forgave him because she was so in love. Unfortunately, before they could run away and live happily ever after, the world was taken over by man-eating plants from outer space. She's far too busy being digested by an alien flytrap to post anything.
The Realistic Explanation-Beena-Pani is reading about seven different books at the same time, working on homework that should have been started weeks before, taking an interest in demonology (well, she likes the names of fallen angels, anyhow), trying to get at least one of her friends to read Good Omens, trying to figure out whysit-coms (especially those that are Canadianor British) aren't appealing to otherpeople who share her physical age,knitting a tea cozy, crocheting a scarf, thinking Deep Thoughts,and sometimesdoing absolutely nothing. She's far too busy doing all that to post anything.
Rest assured, no matter which of these explanations are the true one, stuff will be updated eventually. Just don't hold your breath.