Poll: What should Naruto choose in the Crucible of Fate? Vote Now!
Author has written 24 stories for Discworld, Pirates of the Caribbean, Pokémon, X-overs, Hetalia - Axis Powers, Sgt. Frog/ケロロ軍曹, Star Wars, Naruto, Rosario + Vampire, Kingdom Hearts, Teen Titans, Batman Begins/Dark Knight, Lord of the Rings, Looking for Group, Overlord, Ghost Rider, Sly Cooper, Call of Duty, Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney, Batman: Arkham Asylum, Brave New World, and Darksiders.
We are The Conquerors, and we are Four.
We are not discriminatory However, so you too can join The Conquerors.
Enlist today and become one of the Many faceless minions of our New World Order (Health Care is included and holidays include Thanksgiving, Christmas, and one whole summer month of your choosing. You also get a free grapefruit).
Capital letters are always important when making a statement. A man or woman who is capable of Speaking in capital letters is a dangerous person, as is one who is capable of Thinking in Italics.
Our speciality is crossovers. Crossovers are our trade, as a matter of fact. We Write, Type, and Print crossovers. If you get this reference, congratulations.
We shall, on occasion, Write normal stories. It is only natural that we broaden our interests.
We wish to Conquer the world. Not just Merely take it over, but Conquer it. We have currently Failed at doing so, as evidenced by the serious Lack of us Conquerors Conquering things.
In the Tongue of the Dragon, we are The Kroniidde. Fear our Voices. FUS ROH DAH ! KRII!
In the meantime, until we Conquer the world (and many other worlds), listen to our randomness.
This is a General Message that We, The Conquerors, have Adopted the UC Crossover Showdown from 082 Martian Scout. We hope to Make you Proud and Take the Series in the direction you Intended.
So Say The Conquerors.
C, Z, J, and A
Chuck Norris FACTS (Ones with stars are ones we made up ourselves)
The reason Hitler committed suicide is because Chuck Norris looked at him.*
Chuck Norris could strangle you with a cordless phone.
How a nuclear bomb works: It ejects Chuck Norris from the black pod.*
The reason why the dinosaurs died was because Chuck Norris wanted more room for humans.
Once, Chuck Norris only filled his name in on the SAT. He got a perfect score.
When you say no one is perfect Chuck Norris takes this as a personal insult.
The Fierce Snake (yes this is it's real name) is not the most poisonous animal, Chuck Norris is.*
Chuck Norris can beat you in connect four in three moves.
Godzilla is a true story he was the escaped pet lizard of Chuck Norris when he was visiting Japan, as was King Kong.*
Also if Godzilla and King Kong met each other and fought Chuck Norris would come and kill them both.*
Chuck Norris's liver is a considered a hidden lethal weapon in 106 countries.
Some one once tried to kill Chuck Norris with a knife but the knife died the minute it touched him.
It took Harry eleven years to kill Voldemort, It would take Chuck Norris one second.
When Chuck Norris crosses the street the cars have to look both ways.
When you drive shotgun with Chuck Norris every restaurant has a drive thru.
Chuck Norris isn't afraid of disease's there afraid of him.
What you feel when Chuck Norris kicks you is not his feet but the air they create.
If your behind Chuck Norris he can kick in front of him and the force will travel around the world and hit you in the face.*
The Knights Who Say Ni have a fourth sacred word but it's so powerful it could destroy the earth. It's Chuck Norris.*
They were going to make a Pokemon based off of Chuck Norris but they decided against is since it couldn't be caught in any ball and it beat every Pokemon in one move.*
Alfred F. Jones (America) is the hero because Chuck Norris taught him how to fight.*
If Gilbert (Prussia) and Chuck Norris met the world and possibly the universe would implode from awesome overload.*
Chuck Norris won the Tour De France with two flat tires and a broken chain.*
Chuck Norris can kill you just by thinking about you dying.*
Chuck Norris can do anything in world because whatever he can't do he destroys.*
Chuck Norris will never die. If anyone in the future says that he did he's really just in hiding hunting down criminals and other villains.*
Chuck Norris is so tough that there’s no chin behind his beard, just another fist.
Chuck Norris figured out cold fusion and the end of pi.*
In Soviet Russia, Chuck Norris still kills you.*
This is how Earth was made: Chuck Norris did his Round House Kick while Captain Falcon did his Falcon Punch and that explosion is what made the Earth.
Chuck doesn't battle; he just allows you to lose.
Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC for copyrighting Law and Order, claiming that "Law" and "Order" are the trademarked names for his left and right legs.
The Death Star is actually a testicle that Chuck Norris had donated to the Empire.
Only about 44% of kids have done drugs (i.e. weed, cocaine, etc.)
71% have tried alcoholic beverages.
No statistics exists on how many kids want to be popular so I don't know where you got those numbers from.
Not trying to be an ass here, just trying to fix some misconceptions with those statistics people tend to copy and paste on their profile. At the very least try to keep it factual. Thanks. - Conqueror C
Ni,Ni,Ni,Ni,Ni,Ni, Peng, Peng, Peng, NIII-WOM! We are also members of the Knights who say NI! We demand a SHRUBBERY (or Bonsais or Rhode Island Bushes or Pansies) or read one of our STORIES!
MEET THE CONQUERORS:
CONQUEROR C: Hello I'm Conqueror C; fear me for I am Dovahkiin, dragon born FUS ROH DAH. I share this account with my other three friends though I am the one who has post the most stories. The ones that I have written are as follows:
Canada kills Justin Bieber
Sgt. Frog, General America
Pirates of WWII
The Aura is Strong in This One
Do You Know?
The Overlord At Yokai Academy
The Anime Menace
There is also some stories that I wrote together with Conqueror Z, which are:
Fellowship of the Runner
The New League
Brand New Chaos in a Brave New World
Random info: Now for the part where I divulge random information that nobody really cares about to whomever may be reading this or care enough to read this. There's not much to say about me I guess, I'm generally a nice person... generally. I enjoy a plethora of fandoms and I'm all over the place if you couldn't tell by what I have written in the above list but I do have my favorites. I'm a big history nerd viewing it as the biggest story of them all and I love politics which Z and I discuss regularly (yes there are people who enjoy this and they're deciding your fate). In fiction I usually prefer the "villains" over the "heroes", for sometimes the villains have plausible and justified reasons for their actions that we conveniently overlook. Also who gets to decide who's the hero or villain.
As you could possibly tell from what I said above and our avatar, myself and the other Conquerors are HUGE supporters of the Empire. To us they are the true heroes of the Star Wars universe, not those rebel terrorist. As such I hereby declare that with the exception of The Aura is Strong in This One, all my Star Wars fics will take a pro-imperial stance in order to give tribute to these brave defenders of the galaxy.
Now for some random hobbies: like most I enjoy reading, playing video games (Z and I are gamers), and writing (I'm on this site), political activism, pissing of liberals. One of my more unique hobbies is giving reviews. It doesn't matter what form of media, movies, books, games, shows, anime, I just enjoy writing and giving them out. I feel that its the job of a reviewer to tell readers or listeners what exactly their getting into too. To be fair I judge things by their content not if I like it or not. What I mean by that is that there are things that I may give a bad review on even though I am a hardcore member of its fandom and vice versa.
As mentioned above I'm generally nice most of the time though I have been described as snarker and vulture though mostly to the reviews I gave.
My life dream is to conquer the world (where we get our namesake) while other kids wanted to be firefighters, or in the police force, or become actors and whatnot I wanted to take over the world.
What else can I say, I'm pretty much the best fucking human being on this world- not including my fellow Conquerors of course who are equally as great and minions of the conquerors who- while not as great as us- are still better than most humans for just being associated with us.
To those in the U.S
Alright this is for any and all American citizens who will one day make that faithful choice of electing a new President of this glorious nation of ours. No I myself identify as a right-winger (see below) but this is just a front to piss people off so consider my next words unbiased. When you vote for the next president don't vote for them because they belong to your party, identify with their views, or you admire their character. What we as Americans have to do is see how the rest of the world views them.
What we should do is every four years during election, take candidate A and B to the U.N and make them give a speech of what they plan to do. Then we let them take a vote on which candidate they liked the most. Then we choose the one they hate to lead. For you see the one they hate must be doing something right for this country and have our best interests at heart, not theirs. Oh, so a bunch of dictators don't like our president Gee, I wonder why. If the president of our country is well liked in the international community its generally not a good thing.
A list of my many titles and associated organizations.
Organizations: Proud- Zionist, Conservative, Republican, Right-winger, warmonger, fascist, Nationalist, Elitist, Neo-con, Sadist, Sociopath, (hope you know I'm joking about some of these.)
Titles- Hasbara troll (amany pissed of terror supporters), Zionist shill (same as before), stupid goyim (these assholes are relentless), tea-bagger (coincidentally the same people as before), the real terrorist (you know, lets just assume its the same crowd), Brain-washed zombie (from someone who supports Nazi Germany), Homophobe (never said anything anti-lgbt they just slandered for the sake of slandering), Misogynist (when I point out the flaws of second wave feminism), Islamaphobe (same thing as feminism but with Islam), YOU PISSANT PRECAMBRIAN PILE OF PROTOPLASMIC PUKE (this one was aimed at Z but I share the view that spawned this title so consider this one aimed at me as well.
Our world isn't black and white, but is painted in beautiful shades of gray - Conqueror C
Okay so here is the reason of what I mean by shades of gray and why I prefer the villains at times. First off I find Black and White morality so... dreadfully boring, really. Mostly due to the reason that most conflicts are seldom black and white. I hardly think that people just randomly wake up one day through open their window, look out at the world around them and say, "You know what? I think today I'll start kicking puppies, enslave mankind, and sacrifice virgins to Cthulhu." Here I'll give a real life example of what I mean.
During World War One, which was just called the 'Great War' at the time, both sides were neither really in the right, it was just senseless slaughter caused by high tensions and a misunderstanding. However in order to make going against the opposite side easy both sides used black and white morality to paint the other side of the villain and dehumanize the enemy. American and British propaganda portrayed Germans as Neanderthal-like apes that were rampaging across Europe. In actuality they were just regular young men who felt, and rightly so, that is was their patriotic duty to protect their country. Conversely Germany and the central powers did this as well, portraying Americans as evil-faceless mooks who were there to ravage Europe in an Imperial conquest and rape women. It was the same deal as above, most soldiers felt it was their duty to their country and felt that they were there to liberate Europe.
Now tell me which side are the good guys? Well, that would depend on which side you were on, neither side was good or bad they both had their reasons for fighting. From this I hope you can see where I'm coming from in why I dislike stories in black and white. Now I'm not saying that stories in black and white are bad, you are free to enjoy them and they too can be quite good. My only wish is just to have an increase in stories that touch upon grey areas. And here I end with a final parting to those who were kind enough to stay, I propose a challenge: To break the cycle and put a stop to this madness, pick a fandom, any one that you want, and try to write and view it from a different perspective. Please before we get saturated by usual pure heroes and beautiful heroes and ugly villains.
Philosophy part 2 (the slightly less noble one)
If I don't piss at least someone off once a day, I figure I must be doing something wrong.
I'm baaaaaack. It's been a long time since I was writing but now I can say that I'm back and my writing will be better and longer, and I owe it all to something that I hate. Recently as I was browsing through the internet where I found an interview of an author that I particular loathe who shall remain nameless to avoid mobs of angry fanboys at my doorstep. Now, I clicked on it of sheer boredom because I had nothing better to do and I particular love thrashing on things I hate when I'm bored. Now the interview wasn't to brain damaging at the beginning, making good points such as the author telling young writers to practice writing and review their work, etc. I nodded internally at this, perhaps I was wrong about this author and judged him to hastily. Then the interviewer asked how his books got so well liked, and he replied that he doesn't "try to be awesome, it just come naturally."
At this point I froze for a minute, numb with rage then I went on a mental rampage of flipping tables in super Sayian mode with the Incredible Hulk and a PMSing Supergirl. Now this hits me hard, no matter how good you are there is always room to improve there is no perfection. I've spent many months reflecting on my current and earlier works, wondering how to improve my work to make it better and much more enjoyable. Then there's people like this who think "Well I'm at the epitome of awesomeness so there's really no need for anything to be changed or improved."
No matter how good you get there's always room for improvement. As humans we grow and evolve, we do not stay in a stasis. I highly doubt that when your first started writing it was at the same level as where you are now. As a wise man once said "The definition of insanity is doing the same fucking thing, over and over again expecting shit to change.". As such, from this event I will prove this author wrong by growing and learning from this event along with what I have practiced over the past year to better my writing.
Greetings. I am Z of the Conquerors. Our story began with Conqueror C and I talking. I introduced Conqueror C to fanfiction and got him Hooked. One thing led to Another, and we decided to make our own Profile. Thus, the Conquerors were Born. I enjoy reading and listening to Random and unrelated music when I am not thinking of stories, and I enjoy long Walks on the beach. I also enjoy Reading the Evil Overlord List.
I have had an epiphany Recently. I have seen writers, on this great site of Ours, change their stories dramatically because of their reviews. Even if their story is great, it is changed Because of the reviews. I, Conqueror Z, hereby Declare that I write for the Sake of writing, the Pleasure in watching a plot Come Together, and occasionally out of Boredom. I do Not write for the Whims of people I Have never met nor will Ever meet.
I have written the following stories:
The Second Coming of Dick
The Death Lord
The Owl's Vengeance
A Second Chance
The New League
Fellowship of the Runner
The Crucible of Fate (COF)
The N.O Omake Series (You will See! Oh yes, you will See!)
Reign of Terror (Evil Smile)
Upcoming Stories: (After Reign of Terror, my Next new story will be Based on the result of COF.)
The Curse (COF choice)
The Practitioner (COF choice)
The Shaman (COF choice)
The Gang (COF choice)
The Rat King (COF choice)
The Masked One
Agent of Chaos
Istari of Konoha (COF choice)
Jakku-ketsu (Look up Translation. You will be Surprised.)
Hats are Awesome (COF choice)
Fellowship of the Runner (Rewrite with Conqueror C)
The Archon of the Leaf
Power of the Blind Swordsman
The Dark Ninja
Master of the Void
J has Gone One to become Darthrath.
Our Split personalities have formed The Warlords!
While We conquer Fanfiction.net, They will do the same On FictionPress!
Enemies of State: It would appear that certain individuals have been mucking up world and its peace with their bullshit. Therefore we of the Conquerors, your benevolent future overlords, have declared these individuals as enemies of the state and a threat to peace and stability. Below is a list of these criminals and their crimes. Remember it is your civic duty as a citizen of Earth/Terra to stop these individuals at all cost and report them to your local authorities. Together we can put a stop to their destructive behavior.
Anita Sarkeesian - Imperial Criminal Number One is Anita Sarkeesian. A self-proclaimed feminist and gamer, she has her own YouTube channel named feminist frequency. Her problem is that she has the nasty habit of stating everything is sexist, what makes it worse it that she actually brings up good topics that need to be discussed then abandons them for her own insanity. She blames men for everything wrong with whatever topic she's going on about and uses the word patriarchy so much you could make a drinking game out of it.
What's worse is that she has her definition of feminism, if you so much as disagree with any one thing she says you're obviously sexist and trying to establish a patriarchy even if you yourself are feminist but have different viewpoint on the issue. She complains about girl characters being too girly and weak but if they're a tomboy or tough they are then too manly and not a true female. She is not above using the Wounded Gazelle Gambit to further her agenda. To help fast forward her own kickstarter program she posted her idea ON 4CHAN! That's right, she posted her feminist ideals on the sexist man-child capital of the world and surprise, surprise she didn't get good feedback.
Well after that little stunt people's reactions were, "oh you poor baby. How dare those sexist meanie trolls hurt you. I'll donate money." and yet another surprise, her kickstarter program skyrocketed exceeding the original amount of money wanted from the original 6,000$ to a whopping 159,000$. Now she's doing this on Youtube, where its free to post videos so what does she need this money for? Why it's for her "research materials" A.K.A movies and video games. What's even worse is that she doesn't even use the money for the intended purpose ripping of the let's play footage of other youtubers. By the way the fact that she put her kickstarter on 4chan has all but vanished from the internet (wouldn't make her look as good is people knew the truth now would it?). More will come but for now I'm tired.
The Cross-Dimensional Misadventures of Rincewind: Rincewind's adventures in various plot-lines. He always manages to save them all (After a lot of screaming and running)
The Forever-Lost Crew of (Captain) Jack Sparrow: Jack's search for a permanent crew throughout the Multiverse.
You Better Get Ready to Die: Too many fandoms are too stupid to live yet they do, we want to change that. It's gonna be a fuckin' blood bath.
Naruto Has A Kick-Ass Bloodline (NHAKAB) Series: Our favorite blond ninja with epic abilities
Crucible of Fate: A single decision affects Naruto's life in amazing ways
N.O Omake Series: After a horrible accident, Orochimaru is responsible for unleashing a monster on all life. NARUTO OCTOGONAPUS!!!!! BLAAAAGGGH!
Chaos Series: A little Anarchy, a tad of Chaos, and many worlds will fall under a true Agent of Chaos
The Untold Tales of Sly Cooper (UT): Not originally Ours, and Originally the Untold Chronicles (UC), but with the Permission of 082 Martian Scout, This series Will live Anew.
The Conquerors present:
THE LIST OF BADASSES
Once in a great while, there shall appear to us, a character that we consider to be a Badass. In honor of all of them, we hereby present, In no particular Order, our big bad list of Badass-ery:
Emperor Palpatine--Star Wars
Sauron--Lord of the Rings
Lord Voldemort--Harry Potter
The Overlord--Overlord (game)
Starkiller--Star Wars: The Force Unleashed
Pai Mei--Kill Bill
Clockwerk--The Sly Cooper series
Panda King--The Sly Cooper series
Altair Ibn La-Ahad--Assassin's Creed
John McClane--Die Hard
Davy Jones--Pirates of the Caribbean
Blackbeard--Pirates of the Caribbean
Snake Plissken--Escape From New York/Escape From L.A
Agent Smith--The Matrix series
Cohen the Barbarian--Discworld
Richard--Looking for Group
Witch-King of Angmar--Lord of the Rings
Viktor Reznov--Call of Duty
Kratos--God of War
Alfred F. Jones--Hetalia
Doctor Octogonapus (BLAGGGHHH!)--The Lazer Collection
Hollow Ichigo-- Bleach
Ghost Rider--Ghost Rider
Gunnery Sergeant Hartman--Full Metal Jacket
Gilad Pellaeon (Will Smith of Star Wars)--Star Wars
Daenerys "Stormborn" Targaryen--Game of Thrones/ A Song of Ice and Fire
Nico Di Angelo--Percy Jackson
Grand Admiral Thrawn--Star Wars
Earl Harbinger--Monster Hunter series by Larry Correia (It's an Awesome series.)
Edward Kenway--Assassin's Creed 4: Black Flag
Ysanne Issard--Star Wars
Ezio Auditore da Firenze--Assassin's Creed 2, Brotherhood, and Revelations
Severus Snape--Harry Potter
Edward Richtofen--Call of Duty
Hector Barbossa--Pirates of the Caribbean
Morpheus--The Matrix series
Connor--Assassin's Creed 3
Still under Construction
Timeline of Star Wars events compared to Earth events
When Spielberg created the film E.T, he put Yoda, a Star Wars reference in there for George Lucas. Lucas promised to return the favor in the next Star Wars movie which was the Phantom Menace. In the Senate chamber when Padme decides a Vote of No Confidence, a delegation of E.T's species is seen in their repulsorlift pod in the Senate.
While originally an Easter Egg both Lucas and Spielberg later said that both movies where canon to each other, with others of his species sometimes appearing in other in-universe Star Wars works. This also means that Earth is somewhat canon to Star Wars, as the ship that brings E.T home is a Core Ship used by the Trade Federation seen in Attack of the Clones during the Battle of Geonosis scene. From this knowledge, and little bit of research, we have made a timeline of major Star Wars events in relation to our own world.
Please note that this is our own conjecture based off of the time period in the film E.T and what was happening in the Star Wars universe at this time according to Lucas.
This shall be used in most of our Star Wars Stories, including the in-production Risen.
Please enjoy, and be sure to mention us if you show this to your friends.
25,053 BBY- Formation of the Old Republic
104-BBY World War One
82-BBY Palpatine is born
79-BBY World War Two
71-BBY- Roswell, New Mexico incident
34 BBY- The Trade Federation launches an expedition, funded by Senator Grebleips of Borgo Asogi, to explore the unknown regions of the galaxy
32 BBY- The Trade Federation allies with Darth Sideous and blockades Naboo. Episode I starts
22 BBY- Episode II: Battle of Geonosis and the beginning of the Clone Wars
19 BBY- Episode III: Anakin Skywalker becomes Darth Vader and eradicates most of the Jedi Order. Galactic Empire is formed out of the Republic, Luke and Leia Skywalker are born
3 BBY- The Force Unleashed: Darth Vader's apprentice, codenamed 'Starkiller,' sacrifices himself to form the Alliance to Restore the Republic, or the Rebel Alliance
0-Epsiode IV: The Battle of Yavin, the Death Star is destroyed, Obi-Wan Kenobi is killed by Darth Vader, the Galactic Civil War officially begins
3 ABY- Episode V: The Battle of Hoth, Luke Skywalker receives training from Jedi Master Yoda on Dagobah
5 ABY- Episode VI: The Battle of Endor and the end of the Galactic Civil War, Death Star II is destroyed, Anakin Skywalker sacrifices himself to kill Darth Sideous
25 ABY- 29 ABY- The Yuuzhan Vong War rages. Anakin Solo is killed in action
40 ABY- Second Galactic Civil War: Rise of Jacen Solo as Darth Caedus
137 ABY- Darth Krayt and the Galactic Empire retake the galaxy. The Sith and Empire once more rule
?- Earth was still in the stone age, the first civilizations were just starting to form.
1914- The "Great War" begins
1936-Birth of Emperor Palpatine
1939- Britain and France declare war on Nazi Germany, World War Two begins
1947- Unidentified Flying Object (UFO) crashes in Roswell, New Mexico. Remains taken to secret air force base, codenamed: Area 51. First recorded Alien encounter
1984- E.T is stranded on earth from the Brog Asogian-Trade Federation expedition but is later rescued and returned to GFFA. Second biggest Alien encounter since Roswell, New Mexico
1986- Episode I
1996- Episode II: The Gulf War is ended early due to the Independence Day Invasion by a race of aliens known as The Horde. Major cities are destroyed, but The Horde is ultimately defeated
1999- Episode III
2015- The Force Unleashed
2018- Episode IV
2021- Episode V
2023- Episode VI
2043-2047- Yuuzhan Vong War
2058- Second Galactic Civil War
2155- Darth Krayt and the Empire retake the Galaxy