Author has written 7 stories for Pirates of the Caribbean, Master and Commander, Harry Potter, Little Miss Sunshine, and Pride and Prejudice.
"These are my awards, Mother. From Army. The seal is for marksmanship and the gorilla is for sand racing." --Arrested Development
"I'm comforted by your shiny hair and facial symmetry." --Community
"Constance, how big would a bird have to be for you to be, like, super scared of it?"
"I don't know, like 100 feet, maybe 200. I don't know. You know, I'm sorry, Kyle. I can't think straight right now and that is such a good question." --Party Down