The mission of the Canon Police is simple: To save the works of Prof. J. R. R. Tolkien from abuse by fan-fiction writers.

We are sworn to protect The Immortal Professor’s works from plot changes, “historical” inaccuracies, distortions of character, “10th-member” fics, teenaged girls falling into Middle-Earth, and failure to read the source material. We hold that Prof. Tolkien got it right the first time; that major changes are necessarily inferior to the original and are all too frequently insulting to His genius.

We love good fan-fiction and include many writers in our ranks; we believe that writing stories set in Middle-Earth is a right and proper act of homage to the brilliance of Prof. Tolkien – as long as the authors treat the source material with appropriate respect. Our purpose is not to destroy fan-fiction or Tolkien fandom in general, but to improve it – to save it from itself if need be.

Our definition of “Canon” is Prof. Tolkien’s books, only the books, and all of the books. While most of us admire Mr. Jackson’s films we hold that they are not Canon in themselves but merely a work of fan-fiction, one whose scope and budget we amateur fan-fic writers can only envy. Therefore we do not have jurisdiction over strictly “Movieverse” stories. Neither does our charter cover “AU” or “Alternate Universe” stories. If writers of either type of story label their stories as such we should refrain from taking action against them. (Policy void if an officer is having a bad day)

All types of LOTR fan-fiction, from angst to humor, are under our jurisdiction. Officers are required to leave their story-category prejudices at home, and have no authority to criticize romances for being sticky or humor for being childish – or characters for being Mary-Sues or Marty-Stus. (Putting Mary-Sues in Middle-Earth is not in itself illegal, as long as they do not distort existing plots or characters. Don’t blame us if most of them do so.) The only story-type we are wholly opposed to are “10th member” or “Mary-Sue joins the Fellowship” stories. Adding extra members to the fellowship is intrinsic to said stories - and that is a huge and illegal violation of Canon.

There are those who defend their violations of Canon on the grounds of "creativity" or "imagination", and we would like to make it clear that here at the Canon Police we have nothing but respect for creativity and imagination - it's why we love Prof. Tolkien's work so dearly, after all. But to those whose imagination is so limited that they must borrow other writers characters and settings (including ourselves), we require that they repay the loan of creative material with respect for the author thereof; that they do not replace the personalities of characters and keep the looks, that they do such research as is appropriate to their story, that they do not add silly or unbelievably perfect girls to the Fellowship.

Canon Police officers are required to limit themselves to their stated mission. Any officer caught engaging in personal attacks, vendettas, or unauthorized flame wars will be disciplined. Officers have no authority to issue summons for abuses other than Canon Violations, but may refer non-Canon offenses to such organizations as the Spelling Police, the Grammar Patrol, the Fashion Police, the Anti-Mary-Sue Society, the Godawful Boards, or the PPC.

Thank you, and enjoy your LOTR fan-fiction experience – protected by your friends at the Canon Police.