The Button Harlequin
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Joined 07-13-11, id: 3068393, Profile Updated: 04-28-15
Author has written 13 stories for D.Gray-Man, Kingdom Hearts, Gundam Wing/AC, Legend of Zelda, Sherlock, Avengers, and Captain America.

The Profile of Me

Well damn, and here I thought that I would actually have time to do stuff. Meh, whatevs.

HONEY, I'M HOME!

Something about me:

Age: nineteen years young

Gender: genderfluid and I like girls. Deal.

Likes: Anything that makes me smile and think

Dislikes: Anything that is narrow-minded and prejudice

Some funny Women comebacks I found on an the awesome 'Elise The Amazing's' Profile that I just HAD to post on here.

Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.

Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.

Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.

Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.

Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?

Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together.
Woman: Really, I'd put f and u together.

Man: Your eyes they're amazing.
Woman: Seeing your back would be pretty amazing.

"Winston, if you were my husband, I would poison your coffee!”–Lady Astor to Winston Churchill at a dinner party

“Madam, if I were your husband, I would drink it!"–Winston Churchill’s response to Lady Astor

Never take life seriously. No one ever gets out alive anyway.

You're about to become that strange smell in the attic.

"Nice? Bah! He's gourgeous! You should leave him here so I can hang hats on him and things." -Magnus Bane on frozen Sebastion Verlac

If at first you don't suceed, skydiving is not for you.

I'm at that akward stage between birth and death.

People will believe anything if you whisper it.

"Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss." - Douglas Adams

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car.

Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.

Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils ... - Louis Hector Berlioz

Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling?!

What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet.

"One of the great things about books is sometimes there are some fantastic pictures." -George W. Bush

You can't buy love, but you pay heavily for it.

If we have been pleased with life, we should not be displeased with death, since it comes from the hand of the same master. -Michelangelo

It is necessary to keep one's compass in one's eyes and not in the hand, for the hands execute, but the eye judges. -Michelangelo

The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not. - Mark Twain

When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's relativity. - Albert Einstein

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE that it's weird. If you agree but you've done this, too, copy this and put it in your profile.

If you kinda think mosquitoes are a little bit cooler now because they suck blood (which makes them kinda like a vampire) copy this into your profile

If you know who Panic! At the Disco is and know that they are NOT disco...copy this into your profile.

If you know there's more to good random humour than saying "cheese", "fudge", or "pie", copy and paste this into your profile.

If you don't use Myspace and are proud enough to make it public, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have your own little world & like it that way, copy & paste this into your profile.

If you've ever walked into a doorway that you could've clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa copy this into your profile.

If you're one of those people who gets excited when you see just two reviews, copy and paste this into your profile.

Only crazy people can understand the brilliance of crazy things. If you are crazy and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile!

Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. copy this into your pro if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "where to begin?"

Ok, so I found this on another person's profile, but it was so funny I had to paste it

On a Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping. (Apparently sleep-drying is real).

On a bag of Fritos!:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (Hey, shoplifters everywhere!)

On a bar of Dial soap:
"Directions: Use like regular soap." (And that would be how?...)

On some Swanson frozen dinners:
"Serving suggestion: Defrost." (But it's only a suggestion!)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom):
"Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh)!

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
"Product will be hot after heating." (Wha? Since when?!)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
"Do not iron clothes on body." (But wouldn't this save me more time?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine:
"Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid:
"Warning: May cause drowsiness." (You don't say...)

On most brands of Christmas lights:
"For indoor or outdoor use only." (As opposed to...what?)

On a Japanese food processor:
"Not to be used for the other use." (Now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)

On Sunsbury's peanuts:
"Warning: contains nuts." (Talk about a news flash)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
"Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (But that's so complicated!)

On a child's superman costume:
"Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)

On a Swedish chainsaw:
"Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals." (...I don't want to know...)

On T-Rat (Military food):
Its not for Human Consumption, Animals and Military Use only... (Hey, easy on the military bashing, they're humans too!)

A personal motto, ‘If you can’t beat them, join them; if you can’t join them, kill them; if you can’t kill them, blow them all to kingdom come!”

I'm probably in the sky flying with the fishes; Or maybe in the ocean swimming with the pigeons; see my world is different!

Please make the little voices in my head shut up they're confusing me!!

Don't upset me I'm running out of places to put the bodies.

We're not retreating! We're advancing in a different direction!

The voices in my head are telling me I will get back to you as soon as they are done with me.

9 out of 10 voices in my head say I'm sane. The 10th is undecided.

You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me!

The voices in my head do not like you.

"When life gives you lemons, turn them into grape juice (I like grapes) and let the world wonder how the hell you did it." - Unknown

I stole this from RusCan4Eva who stole this from JazzyKat who stole it from Crown-Daydreamer who stole it from Saphiress who stole it from Saciice who stole it from VampireWithTheGoldenEyes who stole it fromBlack7369 because it is fricken hilarious:

Things I Am Not Allowed To Do At Hogwarts:

1) The Giant Squid is not an appropriate date to the Yule Ball.

2) I am not allowed to sing, "We're Off to See the Wizard" while skipping off to the Headmaster's office.

3) I am not allowed to take out a life insurance policy on Harry Potter.

4) I am not allowed to ask Dumbledore to show me the pointy hat trick.

5) I am not allowed to give Remus Lupin a flea collar.

6) I am not allowed to bring a Magic 8 Ball to Divination.

7) I am not allowed to say that Seamus Finnegan is "after me lucky charms."

8) I am not allowed to start a betting pool on this years Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. It's taste-less, tacky, and not a good money-making strategy.

9) I am not allowed to joke about Remus' "time of the month."

10) I am not allowed to make light saber sounds with my wand.

12) I am not to refer to the Accio charm as "The Force."

13) I am not allowed to claim that growing marijuana or hallucinogenic mushrooms is "Extra Herbology Work."

14) I will not use my socks to make hand-puppets of the Slytherin-House mascot.

15) If the thought of a spell makes me giggle for more than 15 seconds, assume that I am not allowed to use it.

16) I will not lock the Slytherins and Gryffindors in a room together and bet on which House will come out alive.

17) I will not charm the suits of armor to do a rendition of "The Knights of the Round Table" for the Christmas Feast.

18) I am not allowed to declare an official "Hug A Slytherin Day."

19) I am not allowed to sing my own personal spy music while wandering the hallways.

20) It is not necessary to yell, "BURN!" Whenever Snape takes points away from Gryffindor.

21) I will not say the phrase, "Get a Life" to Voldemort.

22) First years are not to be fed to Fluffy.

23) I will never ask Harry if his Voldie senses are tingling.

24) I will stop referring to showering as "Giving Moaning-Myrtle an eye-full."

25) I will not make, "OMGWTF" a spell.

26) It is not necessary to yell, "BAM" every time I Apparate.

27) I will not steal Gryffindor's sword from Dumbledore's office and use it to patrol the hallways.

28) I will not poke Hufflepuffs with spoons, nor shall I insist that their color's indicate that they're "covered in bees."

29) "I've heard every joke possible about Oliver Wood's name" is not a challenge.

30) I will not go to class skyclad.

31) I will not use Umbridge's quill to write, "Told you I was Hard Core."

32) If a class-mate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of that and draw a Dark Mark on their arm.

33) House Elves are not acceptable replacements for Bludgers.

34) I will not start every potion's class by asking Snape if the potion is acceptable as Body Lotion.

35) I will not call the Weasley twins, "bookends."

36) I will not call the Patil twins, "bookends."

37) I will not call the Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher Kenny, even if he is wearing an orange anorak.

38) There is no such thing as a were-thylacine.

39) I will not give Luna Lovegood Coast-To-Coast AM transcripts.

40) Tricking a school House Elf to strip of it's clothing does not make it mine. Yes, even when I yell out "PWND!"

41) I do not weigh the same as a Duck.

42) I do not have a Dalek Patronus.

43) I will not lick Trevor.

44) Gryffindor Courage does not come in bottles labeled, "Firewhiskey."

45) I will not dress up as Voldemort on Halloween.

46) It is a bad idea to tell Snape he takes himself to seriously.

47) I will not tell Sir Cadogan that The Knight's Who Say Ni have challenged him to a duel, then have all the students say, 'Ni' from various directions.

48) I am not the King of the Potato People and I do not have a flying carpet.

49) "To conquer the Earth with an army of flying monkeys" is not a career choice.

50) I will not tell the first years that Professor Snape is the Voice of God.

51) If I go into the Forbidden Woods at night, assume that I don't have a back-up plan

52) I am not allowed to peeve off Peeves, who can be very testy when provoked

53) If there is something that smells funny coming from underneath the Quidditch seats and I am there, move away as fast as you can

54) Never allow me to play Quidditch when I have a wand at the ready

55) When I wear my Hufflepuff robes and something pisses me off I will not say "Honey badger don't care"

56) I will not lock Harry and Draco in a broom closet to see who comes out on top...I mean that in every since of the phrase

57) I will not take the sorting hat to see if House Elves can be trained as a wizard-elf army

58) I will not ask Snape if he ever got over Lily, thereby questioning his virginity

59) I will not ask Bellatrix Lestrange where she got her fabulous 1800s hooker dresses

60) To switch out all the owls with hippogriffs is not conducive to the mail service

There! I added the last ten, can you add more?

This is weird, but interesting! If you can raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too. Cna yuo raed tihs? Olny 55 plepoe out of 100 can. I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed erveylteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! Paste this to your profile if you can read this!

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Here, There Be Dragons by Unadulterated reviews
Thor isn't the only Avenger not native to Earth. But when Tony unexpectedly starts showing symptoms of draconic magic, Clint understandably panics—after all, he thought he'd left everything having to do with his heritage behind three centuries ago… (Dragon!AU)
Avengers - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Angst - Chapters: 4 - Words: 38,281 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 78 - Updated: 3/13 - Published: 10/9/2014 - Iron Man/Tony S., Hawkeye/Clint B.
A New Sort of Exciting by PrettyYaoiBoyz reviews
Seventeen-year-old Gon and Killua return to Heavens Arena with a new goal, but when the young men have an unexpected encounter with someone from their past, things start to move in an even more remarkable direction. PWP Killua/Gon/Hisoka. POV switches between Gon and Killua.
Hunter X Hunter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 15,792 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 174 - Follows: 70 - Updated: 9/25/2014 - Published: 1/30/2014 - Gon F., Killua Z., Hisoka - Complete
Control Freaks by DXM Junkie reviews
Contrary to popular belief, John is not an easy man to live with. After a child's corpse and a few careless words drive him from 221b, it's Sherlock's job to chase his partner down and bring him back home. Johnlock. First Kiss. First Time.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 15,751 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 3/28/2014 - Published: 3/26/2014 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
Trigger Finger by Nameless-Sufferer reviews
John has suffered enough. Between the careful glances and the constant reminders of his only Consulting Detective, he can't deal with it anymore. His only friend now, actually tangible, is his own loyal weapon, the one that served with him in Afghanistan and will serve one final purpose. "Nobody will stop me, as if anybody has already." (Johnlock)
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 15,787 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 6 - Published: 3/25/2014 - [John W., Sherlock H.] - Complete
Band of Hearts by SweetTartAssassin reviews
Abandoned, Guilty and Distrust. 3 doubts 3 boys have on their relationship, so when they go missing, a pharaoh, North Academy's top student and the Master of Faster must save their lovers before they lose them forever. Puzzleshipping, Spiritshipping, Kingcrabshipping
Yu-Gi-Oh - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 7 - Words: 24,005 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 7/17/2013 - Published: 6/16/2013 - Yami Yūgi, Yūgi M. - Complete
Couldn't Seduce A Broomstick by TemperanceNova reviews
Just like the devil woman had said, he couldn't seduce a broomstick from sheer lack of experience. Dante however, could seduce the very moon if he were so inclined. DantexNero
Devil May Cry - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,341 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 6 - Published: 7/6/2013 - Dante, Nero - Complete
Fuchsia Spandex by TheManBehind-TheJokersMask reviews
"Hey Yuy!" Duo and Quatre turned to the Agent who had shouted. Duo looked back to see Heero raise an eye brow at them. "Nice pink spandex!" This is what happens when Duo forgets to replace the Laundry. 1X2 Color Collection Orginial
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 956 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 3 - Published: 6/17/2013 - Duo M., Heero Y. - Complete
Time - Part II by Mistress Moitie reviews
Sequel to "Time - Part I". Memories are hidden deep as Link is thrown into an unfamiliar reality, where he must fight unaware alongside the one person who cares for him most. References taken from a myriad of Zelda titles, although OoT in nature. Link/Male Sheik. Chapters will be posted weekly.
Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Mystery/Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 29,304 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 6/3/2013 - Published: 4/29/2013 - Link, Sheik - Complete
Movie Night by Lotus Butterfly reviews
Nero had his reasons for starting the tradition. Just as Dante had his reasons for going along with it. Warning, mega fluff and mild angst ahead! DxN. Rated T for cursing. Really now just a place for me to dump fluffiness.
Devil May Cry - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 6,288 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 79 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 12/30/2012 - Published: 2/18/2011 - Dante, Nero - Complete
Blessed And Cursed by PorcelainPills reviews
Everything starts when Kyrie gets married. But not to Nero. Devastated about her betrayal, he sinks into depression. But even with Dante's help, Nero can't escape his past - and that's not the only problem the hunters have to face... DxN, Yaoi.
Devil May Cry - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 12 - Words: 85,572 - Reviews: 98 - Favs: 123 - Follows: 70 - Updated: 10/22/2012 - Published: 4/7/2012 - Nero, Dante - Complete
Lackluster by Unadulterated reviews
Ed is removed from his abusive stepfather's care after years of hurt – and placed in the home of his direct superior Roy Mustang. With Al missing and Ed attempting to cope with unbelievable scarring, can Roy hope to be able to help Ed? Warning: child abuse.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Chapters: 18 - Words: 66,070 - Reviews: 528 - Favs: 572 - Follows: 275 - Updated: 9/24/2012 - Published: 3/13/2012 - Edward E., Roy M. - Complete
How to Catch a 'Straight' Guy by MoonLLotus reviews
I'm Duo Maxwell, an all in all sexy beast. Just about every girl wants me. Unfortunately for them I'm as straight as the letter 'S'. And unfortunately for me I just so happen to be crushing on the straightest guy in school.-REVAMPED
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 15 - Words: 24,585 - Reviews: 206 - Favs: 87 - Follows: 119 - Updated: 7/27/2012 - Published: 10/19/2007 - Duo M., Heero Y. - Complete
A Blonde Temptation by Thanatos Angelos Girl reviews
Kairi could never have imagined working with her, never mind the other things Kairi did that night. Namine really was a blonde temptation. Rated M for a reason. Oneshot.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,767 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/28/2012 - Kairi, Naminé - Complete
Strife Family Reunion by TheSicklyRoseVamp1229 reviews
As much as Leon loves Cloud, he would do anything to avoid another Strife family reunion. Not that Cloud blames him. In his family anything could happen. Leon/Cloud plus Riku/Sora, Axel/Roxas and many other pairings
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,419 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 46 - Follows: 7 - Published: 6/21/2012 - Leon/Squall L., Cloud S. - Complete
People Lessons 101 by Annoying Little Twit reviews
Giftfic. 1x2. People's actions are confusing, luckily his best friend is there to give him lessons. "Lesson 3: If you tell someone that you don't wish to be their boyfriend, I very much doubt they'll go change their bits to make you happy."
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,553 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 44 - Follows: 3 - Published: 4/12/2012 - [Duo M., Heero Y.] - Complete
Divinity by Thai Tea Addict reviews
AU. Heero, God of War, didn't particularly care what happened in the realm of the immortals. Duo, Death himself, saw no reason to change that. 1x2, implied 3x4
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: T - English - Horror/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,506 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 4 - Published: 2/25/2012 - Heero Y., Duo M. - Complete
The Art of Knocking by KuroGoddess reviews
Dante and Nero are mates. Nero is in heat. Who can resist that? Well, Dante can't. Something funny when the two hunters get caught in the act! This is DantexNero, yaoi. Warning: Has sexual themes, a slight lime, seductive Nero, and shocked Lady and Trish.
Devil May Cry - Rated: M - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,436 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 88 - Follows: 8 - Published: 12/26/2011 - Dante, Nero - Complete
Handcuffs by Sarabellum93 reviews
Yuri,Kairi wakes up to realize that her hands have been restrained behind her while Namine has fun with her. They make love but when Namine gets spanked, Kairi has to be punished. Little does she know, Kairi has a punishment of her own waiting for Namine.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,658 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 45 - Follows: 7 - Published: 11/5/2011 - Kairi, Naminé - Complete
Once Again With Feeling by AAJ Edward reviews
Dante and Nero face their largest challenge yet when a demon of dance and song comes to Capulet City and causes mayhem in the form of a musical lifestyle.
Devil May Cry - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,470 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 1 - Published: 10/31/2011 - Nero, Dante - Complete
Monday's Child by Madam Sakamoto reviews
Monday's Child is Fair of Face, Tuesday's Child is Full of Grace, Wednesday's Child is Full of Woe, Thursday's Child has Far to Go, Friday's Child is Loving and Giving, Saturday's Child Works Hard for His Living, And the Child that is born on the Sabbath Day is Bonny and Blithe, and Good and Gay... -Drabble Set - Spoilers for Series End-
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Angst - Chapters: 7 - Words: 1,891 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 10/26/2011 - Envy, Edward E., Roy M., Alphonse E. - Complete
Shadow Child by Forever Kissing reviews
Link finds himself in a completely wrong situtation, and at the same time Gannondorf has returned to Hyrule. Now the Hero of Time is trapped, unable to fight, and alone. Now only Dark Link can save Link, the Sages, and Hyrule. Link/Dark Mpreg rewrite
Legend of Zelda - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 12 - Words: 57,971 - Reviews: 81 - Favs: 188 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 10/1/2011 - Published: 10/22/2010 - Dark Link, Link - Complete
Of Mist and Shadows by A Midnights Dream reviews
Ganondorf shaped him, but it was essentially Link that created his form with evil thoughts and emotions.All this time he's dwelled in shadows and mist.When Link's blood is drawn the demon experiences a lust so deep, he craves his suffering and his body
Legend of Zelda - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 12,333 - Reviews: 48 - Favs: 172 - Follows: 31 - Published: 9/14/2011 - Link, Dark Link - Complete
Weird Day by kidishcaresh reviews
Duo has a weird day...it's a must read to get it fic...you'll laugh.
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 814 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 4 - Published: 8/30/2011 - Duo M. - Complete
Surviving Friends With Tails by In2lalaland reviews
Duo gets used as a guinea pig by a revengeful scientist, so why is Wufei the one who keeps getting the short end of the stick? 2x5x2, War time. Dedicated to all the cat lovers out there.
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 16 - Words: 85,285 - Reviews: 203 - Favs: 107 - Follows: 89 - Updated: 8/18/2011 - Published: 2/5/2010 - Duo M., Wufei C. - Complete
Kinky Undertaker by EverLastingXLove reviews
Lets just say the Undertaker is a very Kinky horny lonely man, and if you dont have very good jokes he wants you to step inside his fanstasy room. I DO NOT OWN BLACK BUTLER OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS!
Kuroshitsuji - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,185 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 9 - Published: 7/16/2011 - Undertaker, William S. - Complete
Zap! by FluffySnowflake reviews
Sheik is used to waking up on Midna's floor after a drunken night. He's not used to waking up with a dare written on his hand and the threat to be forced to dance in public naked if he doesn't complete the dare. AU. Link x Sheik, includes other pairings.
Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,168 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 80 - Follows: 4 - Published: 5/18/2011 - Link, Sheik - Complete
Torment of the Inner Duo by Danyu reviews
AU, 1X2. Sometimes all you need to get rid of a vice is the right motivation. Two-shot.
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,058 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 5/18/2011 - Published: 5/4/2011 - [Heero Y., Duo M.] - Complete
Razzmatazz Hate by TheManBehind-TheJokersMask reviews
Color Collection: Heero's not enjoying the party. So he holds out for his knight in shining armor. Or Duo on a motorcycle. Whichever comes first. 1x2 one-shot
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 776 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 2 - Published: 5/2/2011 - Duo M., Heero Y. - Complete
A Slither, and He Withers by Crimson Fade reviews
SebastianxSnake. Sebastian checks up on the newest servant, Snake. Light Yaoi.
Kuroshitsuji - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 860 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 4 - Published: 3/2/2011 - Sebastian M., Snake - Complete
Amigos by Silver Ame Tsukino reviews
Heero and Duo are best friends. They end up in jail for the night and you know what they say: a friend bails you out, a best friend is beside you saying 'Damn, we f***ed up'. sorta sequel to Tomodachi can be read alone AU
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,262 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 3 - Published: 2/20/2011 - Duo M., Heero Y. - Complete
Santa Baby by CrispyDruid reviews
Duo is giving out a very special Christmas present to his friends! Check your nosebleeds at the door, and enjoy the show!
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,703 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/19/2011 - Duo M., Heero Y. - Complete
Half Asleep by Kaerith reviews
1x2, fluff. Heero talked in his sleep. In fact, in the moments just after he fell asleep, Heero could answer questions.
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,820 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 80 - Follows: 7 - Published: 12/10/2010 - Duo M., Heero Y. - Complete
Practical War by Vash The Humanoid Sunshower reviews
Heero and Duo engage in a practical joke war while hiding out at a boarding school. Vaguely shonen-ai. "'Heero, did you short-sheet my bed' Just asking the question out loud made me start laughing. Heero Yuy?"
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,254 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 3 - Published: 12/1/2010 - Duo M., Heero Y. - Complete
Chrysalis by Laora reviews
Winry's newest customer is in for a surprise when he meets Ed.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,079 - Reviews: 57 - Favs: 535 - Follows: 59 - Published: 10/22/2010 - Edward E. - Complete
Gegen Gott by PockymonX3 reviews
Homosexuality is a sin, what I've been taught my whole life. Ever since the accident. Then I met him, at a Catholic school of all places. Edvy.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 21 - Words: 45,706 - Reviews: 281 - Favs: 191 - Follows: 80 - Updated: 10/8/2010 - Published: 2/25/2010 - Edward E., Envy - Complete
Sanity Is Excusable by StandingOnTheRooftops reviews
In this comedy, Duo finds something to amuse himself, & he drags Quatre & Heero along for the ride. Really... just how crazy can excuse letters get? Answer: VERY! Humor, hints at 2x1/1x2 and obvious 3x4. Sidefic, sorta, for 'Alive But Without Permission'.
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,584 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 46 - Follows: 5 - Published: 9/20/2010 - Duo M., Heero Y. - Complete
Barbie Doll by GundamTrinity reviews
Written by StandingOnTheRooftops! More Duo and Lady Une fun! Hahahahaha! Implied pairings: 2x1, TreizexUne, ZechsxTreize. Rated mostly for foul language, so be for-warned. Much, much mental abuse of a certain Oz soldier, and possible abuse of brownies!
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,112 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/19/2010 - Duo M., L. Une - Complete
Standards by Bookwrm389 reviews
Ed stared down Winry's date for the night with an appraising look. At last, he cocked an eyebrow and stuck one automail finger in the smug teen's face. "Alright, you lucky bastard. You've met her standards. The question is...can you meet mine?" EdWin!
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,203 - Reviews: 236 - Favs: 1,185 - Follows: 107 - Published: 8/8/2010 - [Edward E., Winry R.] - Complete
A Lesson Learned Fishing by TedTheTalkingPotato reviews
A story in which Dark attempts to fish, and Link decides to never snooze off around his shadow again. Slight OOCness, but nothing major. T to be safe.
Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,602 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 4 - Published: 7/2/2010 - Dark Link, Link - Complete
For Your Entertainment by Kael-bail reviews
Slightly AU, RoyEd, oneshot. While at a bachelor's party, Roy finds himself entangled with a particular employee, who is ready to blow his mind. SMUT AND STRIPPING!
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,147 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 78 - Follows: 8 - Published: 1/20/2010 - Edward E., Roy M. - Complete
Tears and Rain by SchwarzShifter reviews
Ed is being abused by Roy as motivation to get his work done. He's sitting on a roof when someone finds him, and instead of killing him, he comforts him. But when Ed returns to his senses and Envy to his hyper bloodlust, will they be ready to trust? YAOI
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 11 - Words: 16,537 - Reviews: 113 - Favs: 203 - Follows: 99 - Updated: 1/20/2010 - Published: 12/18/2008 - Edward E., Envy - Complete
A Dragon In The Backseat by In2lalaland reviews
Wufei is fed up with the music world and all the shallow people running it. Then when he meets a talkative cabdriver who hates his music, his life just might reach a new chapter. 2x5 AU.
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 15,775 - Reviews: 109 - Favs: 124 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 10/23/2009 - Published: 10/9/2009 - Duo M., Wufei C. - Complete
Pillow Talk by ElfNight reviews
1 small safehouse PLUS 1 dragon talking in his sleep EQUALS 02 having a lot of fun! SLASH! 2x5
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 6,351 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 82 - Follows: 22 - Updated: 10/19/2009 - Published: 9/24/2009 - Wufei C., Duo M. - Complete
Broken lock by kibasluv reviews
Dark link x link i guess lol. Zelda hears something from the bathroom and wishes she never heard. This is just something i thought of at 3am in the morning lol. Rated mostly for the thoughts and language.
Legend of Zelda - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,026 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 3 - Published: 7/16/2009 - Dark Link, Link - Complete
Losing the Plot by Spiritual Stone reviews
Drunk!LinkXSheik: He'd heard plenty of stories about drunk people. How the alcohol made them giggly or sad or aggressive or completely and utterly crazy. So, having never heard of hard-nosed, HOT, mysterious Sheik to be drunk, Link was a little curious...
Legend of Zelda - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,064 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 57 - Follows: 3 - Published: 3/3/2009 - Link, Sheik - Complete
Romance Novels and Ridiculous Notions by silverserpent08 reviews
A problem that arises on a lazy day of lounging. Warnings: Silly. Ridiculously sweet. To the point you may need oral surgery afterwords. 2 5
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 982 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 7 - Published: 1/24/2009 - Duo M., Wufei C. - Complete
Message Reflected by Merith reviews
Duo ponders Heero's unusual use of the bathroom mirror. AU, heero/duo
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,246 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 2 - Published: 1/22/2009 - Duo M., Heero Y. - Complete
Learning Curve by Lady Ezri reviews
Lockon helps out when he discovers that a fellow Meister doesn't know how to write in English, and helps teach him something else.
Gundam 00 - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 736 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 45 - Follows: 5 - Published: 8/27/2008 - Lockon, Setsuna - Complete
Trite by Dark Sadistic Angel reviews
Old Story . 1x2, 3x4. Heero is a writer of gay novels. Trowa is a writer of lesbian novels. Heero thinks he is straight and searching for the right woman. Trowa is outright gay and pretending to be a woman to get a homophobic guy.
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,440 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 3 - Published: 8/27/2008 - Heero Y., Duo M. - Complete
Simple Complications by Dark Sadistic Angel reviews
Old Story . Schoolboy romance between Duo who is in the closet , and Heero, who does not know he is gay. Yet. 1x2.
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,557 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 10 - Published: 8/27/2008 - Heero Y., Duo M. - Complete
Bad Touch by Chrysnurse reviews
NOT the song. One-shot. Duo and Wufei are captured. Duo has a new security system in Deathscythe. Heero twitches.
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 596 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/11/2008 - Duo M. - Complete
Lost and Found by greenikat89 reviews
Oneshot: Somehow this was Cloud's fault. Vincent wouldn't have been rejected by the love of his life and he would never have woken up with a huge hangover in a stranger's bed. A male stranger's bed. Yuffie would never let him live this down. S/V
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,933 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 20 - Published: 7/29/2008 - Sephiroth - Complete
Inferences by ShenLong1 reviews
The Gundam boys are baby-sitting one of Quatre's nieces. The tot begins to cry, so everyone has their own thoughts on what's wrong and how to deal with it. 1x2, 3x4, Yaoi, fluff, torture of nursery rhymes
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,458 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/25/2008 - Duo M., Heero Y. - Complete
Number Twenty Eight by Sevlow reviews
As of today, Edward Elric had been missing for four months, two weeks, and five days. Warnings for angst, some gore, and Chimera!Ed. Complete
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 15 - Words: 63,347 - Reviews: 878 - Favs: 1,506 - Follows: 310 - Updated: 5/1/2008 - Published: 1/31/2008 - Edward E., Roy M. - Complete
Reverse Psychology by Jukebox Hound reviews
Most people become Preventers to maintain world peace. Most people, except Duo. Revised 27 May 2010.
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,062 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 202 - Follows: 21 - Published: 12/19/2007 - Duo M., Heero Y. - Complete
Your attention please by cherry fantasy reviews
[Long oneshot] Duo found a book that seems to have completely captured his attention. Unusual... but good, right ? Well, Heero doesn't think so... [YAOI, 1x2, mentions of 3x4]
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,828 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 74 - Follows: 12 - Published: 3/28/2007 - Heero Y., Duo M. - Complete
That Blonde One by Nienna29 reviews
Someone has gotten a hold of crystallized red water and is using it for his own sick proposes. Now Ed must go undercover as a stripper in order to bring this man into the open. WARNING: Do not take this seriously. It's just a really silly story! :D
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Humor/Crime - Chapters: 12 - Words: 15,182 - Reviews: 151 - Favs: 72 - Follows: 42 - Updated: 3/18/2007 - Published: 9/27/2005 - Edward E., Roy M. - Complete
Your Good People by Jukebox Hound reviews
[Drabble, light 1x2] Duo answers the door. If you're a Witness, don't read this.
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 737 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 103 - Follows: 7 - Published: 3/14/2007 - Duo M., Heero Y. - Complete
Gravity by redwing55 reviews
When Sora's parents sign him up for a summer climbing camp, he's less than enthusiastic. But with some interesting new friends, and a handsome, infuritating boy to deal with, this week could be more interesting than he thought...SoraRiku, AxelRoxas, AU.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 15 - Words: 68,763 - Reviews: 1055 - Favs: 1,026 - Follows: 229 - Updated: 8/26/2006 - Published: 5/21/2006 - Sora, Riku - Complete
Seme or Uke? by Mathais reviews
When Riku entered a relationship with Sora, he was sure of two things: one, that he liked, if not loved, Sora, and, two, that he was going to be the seme. Now he's not quite so sure of the latter.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,901 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 87 - Follows: 8 - Published: 6/29/2006 - [Riku, Sora] - Complete
Sleepless Nights by Celianna reviews
Gon has been restless ever since a couple of months now. Poor naive boy can’t figure out why he can’t sleep – when the cause of his sleepless nights is sleeping on the other side of the room.
Hunter X Hunter - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,643 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 141 - Follows: 15 - Published: 11/1/2005 - Gon F., Killua Z. - Complete
Link and the Vampires' Teabags by H.J. Bender reviews
This is a ridiculously absurd story. You might need to see a psychiatrist after reading it. Link has a strange medical problem that only gets worse when he reaches sexual maturity... Rated for pants-wettingly, godawful-funny gayness.
Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Humor/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,322 - Reviews: 106 - Favs: 105 - Follows: 11 - Published: 9/17/2005 - Link, Sheik - Complete
A Mary Sue Alphabet by Irony-chan reviews
A's for Amanda Our hero's twin sister Got lost as a baby and Gosh, how he missed her...
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,497 - Reviews: 2642 - Favs: 6,283 - Follows: 401 - Published: 1/12/2005 - Complete
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From Edge to Edge reviews
Bucky is a demon that grants wishes in exchange for souls. Steve is 7 when he visits, but 17 when Bucky comes to collect. Bucky keeps making excuses for why he keeps putting off collecting, until an ultimatum is given: take Steve Rogers soul or take his place in Hell. Bucky chooses the former. Steve is not going to take that. Violence, depictions of Hell, Stucky, lots of characters
Captain America - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 37,491 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 12/19/2014 - Published: 10/4/2014 - Bucky B., Steve R./Capt. America
10 Things I Hate About You reviews
Phil is the new kid, Clint can't date, and Steve won't date. There's Loki, who thinks Clint's hot (because he is) but so does Phil. Then there comes the new rule: little brother Clint can date when big brother Steve does. Problem is, Steve's a "crotchety old windbag". But Loki's loaded and Bucky's just in it for the money. Right? Stucky! Phlint! Loki want Clint! Deadpool's here?
Avengers - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 9,629 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 9/15/2014 - Published: 8/25/2014 - Agent Phil Coulson, Loki, Hawkeye/Clint B., Captain America/Steve R.
My Heart of Glass reviews
Steampunk AU. When war veteran John Watson comes home he doesn't feel that things are going to be alright, what with no arm and no will to live and all. But when Sherlock Holmes comes into the picture bringing the familiar rush, John thinks that things will get better. Before Moriarty and Magnussen come into the picture that is. JohnLock. Not Magiarty.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,757 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 5 - Published: 3/6/2014 - Sherlock H., John W., J. Moriarty, C. A. Magnussen
Long to Be Free reviews
Link is a stripper/hooker that wants to get away from his pimp Gannondorf. When a friend recommends the Shadow of Hyrule to fix his problems he thinks he's found the answer but is the shadow really worth all the trouble? Especially when a scary secret threatens to over rule any and all rewards that could have been. AU, mature content, MxM, lots of bad language
Legend of Zelda - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 4 - Words: 12,027 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 8/8/2013 - Published: 7/13/2013 - Dark Link, Link
Fangirls reviews
Allen sees some interesting people following him and Lavi, but when Lavi explains who they are and what they're there for does it change how much Allen really thinks of Lavi?
D.Gray-Man - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 524 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 2 - Published: 7/13/2013 - Allen Walker - Complete
Where Link Keeps His Stuff reviews
Self Explanatory. Enjoy
Legend of Zelda - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 566 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Published: 6/21/2013 - Link, Zelda - Complete
Unbreakable reviews
After Link deals with Gannon another older and deadlier force surfaces that proves to be a bigger problem than Link could have ever imagined that goes by the name of Xanth. To help him along is the spunky girl Sorrel, but is her spirit so strong that it cannot be broken by Xanth? Torture fic. I no own Zelda. For Bridgie. possible LinkXOC
Legend of Zelda - Rated: M - English - Drama/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,848 - Reviews: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/19/2013
Award Ceremony reviews
While Heero is doing his work as a Preventer agent, a sudden window pops up on his laptop of Duo in a suit and about to start an award ceremony of awards that many actually do not want. At all. Total Crack and One-shot. 1x2 at the very end. Rated for awkward situations and Duo's bad language including mine now that I come to think about it R&R please
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,645 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 7 - Published: 8/7/2012 - Duo M., Heero Y. - Complete
Why Does the Sun Set Red? reviews
Heero's thoughts and memories of a sunset on the battlefield. Was Duo the one who was right the whole time?
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 642 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/2/2012 - Duo M., Heero Y. - Complete
Eternal Lonliness reviews
What happens when Axel, Roxas, and Saix dare Demyx to investigate the old abandoned castle at the edge of town? And do the strange disappearances have anything to do with the lights and sounds coming from it?
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: T - English - Romance/Fantasy - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,034 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 8/5/2011 - Published: 8/4/2011 - Zexion, Demyx
Jolly Lavi, Blackponytail, and the Flying Komrin reviews
A pirates life for Allen or the forever servitude of a fat prince? Three pirates, one goal: claim the servant boy for their crew and themselves. Lots of pirate escapaeds and nutty pirateness.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,624 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 8/1/2011 - Published: 7/20/2011 - Allen Walker
HalfNumbers reviews
A pointless conversation between IX and VI. Did you know that half-numbers do not have any support, and need to have a campaign to raise awareness? No pairings, just a good story.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,818 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/20/2011 - Zexion, Demyx - Complete
New Weapons, New Smell, New Results reviews
Allen is attacked on his way back to the Order by the Earl, who uses a new weapon on him as a test. The result? All the ladies run away, and all men are after him! Including his fellow exrocists. Will one of them get the sought after prize of a night with the young Moyashi? Two chapters because the first is innocent Allen and the second is a not-so-innocent Allen.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 7,705 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 7/20/2011 - Published: 7/16/2011 - Allen Walker - Complete