Pjazz
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Joined 12-19-02, id: 312277, Profile Updated: 01-02-12
Author has written 51 stories for Seinfeld, Will and Grace, Harry Potter, Friends, TV X-overs, X-overs, Book X-overs, Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles, Big Bang Theory, and Gilmore Girls.

Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever. -- Napoleon Bonaparte

What writing? It's a tv show. How hard can it be? -- George Costanza

For me some words come easy, but I know that they don't mean that much. -- Jackson Browne

I'm male, British - English to be exact. (Yes, there's a difference.)

I've written stuff for the BBC and Channel 4. Mostly smalltime, but the BBC did show some interest in a sitcom pilot I'd written before deciding to pass. (I like to think with much soul-searching, but they prob just binned it.) I have a cushy lifestyle in a quiet but beautiful part of southern England. I'm pretty lucky. I can't complain - tho it's never stopped me before!

I love American popular culture, especially Seinfeld, Will & Grace, Sopranos, One Tree Hill, True Blood, T:SCC and most sci fi including BSG, Buffy and Firefly.

Fanfiction

Jeeves

The Jeeves stories were inspired by an article in GQ magazine about London city-types being so wealthy they could afford personal valets.(Pre-credit crunch, natch) My stories place Jeeves and Bertie in a contemporary setting, bang slap in the 21st century. They didn't attract too much attention on fanfiction, but seem to have found an audience elsewhere, notably on several Wodehouse fansites where it's been suggested I'm a reincarnation of the Great Man himself, LOL!. My fav is prob Cheating Gutbucket, but the stats suggest Double Whammy is the pick of them. I'm a lousy judge when it comes to my own stuff.

The Secret Diary of Cameron Baum

This started out as a simple Cameron/Bridget Jones-type spoof, mutated somewhat, and is now my most popular fanfic by a distance, accounting for eighty percent of my traffic - new updates or no. It's strayed far from the canon yet retains an audience. Blows my mind. I've threatened to end it twice and still can't bring myself to leave it alone.

PJAZZ IS TAKING A BREAK

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Born to Fight by River2027 reviews
Season 3. In the Born to Fight finale: Skynet has been defeated, leaving John with nothing left to live for. But a surprise gift from Weaver and John Henry may give him the one thing he desires most.
Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles - Rated: T - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 61 - Words: 335,968 - Reviews: 1047 - Favs: 377 - Follows: 223 - Updated: 8/11/2017 - Published: 4/12/2009 - John C. - Complete
Delilah by aelysian reviews
Hers is only one of many: stories, lives, pasts and futures. Cameron Phillips' life is a coil, a twist of time unraveling, the end chasing the beginning. Cameron origins fic. Pre-series through to Born to Run.
Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 15 - Words: 26,425 - Reviews: 123 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 4/6/2013 - Published: 4/24/2011 - Cameron
Cancelled by triggercini reviews
A certain FOX executive learns the hard and violent way what happens when you cancel T:SCC when he receives a not so pleasant visit by a very pissed off Connor Crew.
Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,549 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 4 - Published: 5/20/2009 - Complete
Judgement's Dawn by King Steve reviews
A Prequel to Liberation Day. All their previous efforts have failed and Judgement Day is upon them. Follow John and Cameron's development together as they start the fight back against Skynet. Jameron.
Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Romance - Chapters: 17 - Words: 121,150 - Reviews: 244 - Favs: 215 - Follows: 99 - Updated: 5/3/2009 - Published: 7/21/2008 - John C., Cameron - Complete
Emergent Properties by Stephensmat reviews
Emergent Properties are things that you find in an object or a creature, that cannot be explained or defined as simply being a sum of their parts. Spoilers for Allison From Palmdale Onward.
Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 5 - Words: 14,002 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 45 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 4/11/2009 - Published: 10/4/2008 - Complete
Perfection by Peptuck reviews
By her death, he knew her. Future John POV. Spoilers, "Allison From Palmdale."
Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,240 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 64 - Follows: 18 - Published: 10/1/2008 - John C., Allison Y. - Complete
The Planets Will Turn by thekidwiththehelmet reviews
River gets hooked on soap operas and decides the use them as a guide to seduction. RiverJayne
Firefly - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 15,537 - Reviews: 60 - Favs: 125 - Follows: 19 - Published: 2/9/2006 - River, Jayne - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Secret Diary Of Cameron Baum reviews
Cameron keeps a secret and personal diary of her activities. Next chapter. The gang design and build drones then travel to the desert to test them out
Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 106 - Words: 434,019 - Reviews: 2939 - Favs: 804 - Follows: 789 - Updated: 10/12 - Published: 8/5/2008
Metal Guru reviews
Third season. Sarah Connor goes to ground in Mexico taking Cameron's useless body with her. But powerful forces have noticed their exploits. One man in particular will not stop until he gets what he wants: Cameron.
Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles - Rated: T - English - Drama/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 12 - Words: 33,649 - Reviews: 117 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 50 - Updated: 2/14/2012 - Published: 6/9/2009
Cameron's Christmas Carol reviews
On a wild and stormy christmas eve Cameron is visited by the ghost of Jacob Marley who shows her a Christmas Past, Present and Future.
Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,256 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 3 - Published: 12/20/2010 - Complete
A Girl Named Allison reviews
A sequel to A Girl Named River. Catherine Weaver has a new mission for ace scavenger Vinny Savage. Kidnap Allison Young from under the nose of John Connor's Resistance. Chapter 4. Faced with John Connor's wrath, Vinny chooses a radical lifestyle change.
Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 14,170 - Reviews: 48 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 9/5/2010 - Published: 8/15/2010 - Complete
A Girl Named River reviews
Vinny Savage, mercenary and scavenger, encounters a mysterious young girl amid the ruins of post-apocalypse LA. A girl named River. Final chapter. Vinny delivers River into Catherine Weaver's clutches - and gets the surprise of his life.
Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 11,081 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 5/20/2009 - Published: 4/25/2009 - Complete
Between the Buttons reviews
Rory and Lane discuss bands to see in the afterlife.
Gilmore Girls - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 958 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/6/2009 - Rory G., Lane K. - Complete
The Strife of Riley reviews
Riley Dawson. Allison Young. Cameron Baum. Bound together by the Past their destinies converge in the Present. Final chapter. Endgame. With Riley cornered Cameron moves in for the kill. Allison Young's fate hangs in the balance.
Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 9,902 - Reviews: 41 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 4/18/2009 - Published: 3/8/2009
Rebel Without a Clause reviews
Taylor tries to persuade Lorelai and Rory to sign a petition.
Gilmore Girls - Rated: K - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 902 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/15/2009 - Complete
Beginners Luke reviews
Luke installs a dartboard in the diner. Lorelai and Rory investigate. Oneoff.
Gilmore Girls - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,000 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/8/2009 - Complete
Camp X Ray reviews
Howard invents x-ray spectacles and tries them out on Penny. Big mistake...
Big Bang Theory - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,527 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 1 - Published: 3/18/2009 - Complete
Paper Tiger reviews
Latino badass Chola is interviewed by FBI Agent James Ellison. Probable oneoff.
Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles - Rated: K+ - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,052 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/27/2008
Cameron and the Laughter Experiment reviews
Cameron develops her sense of humour. Oneoff.
Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,064 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 5 - Published: 7/22/2008 - Complete
Desolation Road reviews
Derek Reese and his younger brother Kyle travel through the post-apocalyptic ruins of San Diego in search of John Connor. Mostly post-Judgement Day. Completed. Chapter 9 of 9.
Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles - Rated: K+ - English - Drama - Chapters: 9 - Words: 18,771 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 7/9/2008 - Published: 5/7/2008
Klaatu Barada Nikto reviews
Begins seconds after the explosion. The tension between Cameron and Derek Reese finally reaches breaking point.
Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,310 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 3 - Published: 4/28/2008 - Complete
Black Widow Rising reviews
From the future comes a next-generation terminator. A female hybrid, beautiful, sexy and equipped with advanced pheromone technology. John and Cameron are drawing closer. Will she tear them apart?
Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,975 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 8 - Published: 4/20/2008 - Complete
Cameron versus Dodgeball reviews
Cameron struggles to suppress her terminator impulses during a game of school dodgeball. John discovers he has an unlikely ally in the future.
Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles - Rated: M - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,984 - Reviews: 41 - Favs: 63 - Follows: 10 - Published: 4/9/2008 - Complete
The Curious Case of Rodney P
A Saki fanfic. A comedy of sex, drugs and a psychic parrot. The most dissolute man in the world suffers parental issues - from beyond the grave.
Book X-overs - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,807 - Published: 1/10/2008 - Complete
Jeeves and the Boxing Chump reviews
A country house, an old pal, a blonde heiress, vicious German dogs and a boxing contest all conspire to land Bertie Wooster in the soup.
Book X-overs - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,149 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Published: 10/11/2007 - Complete
Jeeves and the Bugatti Veyron reviews
Bertie Wooster purchases a Bugatti Veyron and falls in love with Mallory Wadkins. Bertie decides to propose marriage if only he can stop antagonising her father.
Book X-overs - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,132 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 6/26/2007 - Complete
The One with the Frozen Heads reviews
Monica launches a cookery website and suffers from schadenfreude. Phoebe gets a job in cryogenics. Joey has to take a psyche test for medical insurance and enlists Ross and Chandler's help to appear sane.
Friends - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,629 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Published: 5/10/2007
Jeeves and the Double Whammy reviews
Thanks to Aunt Agatha's meddling Bertie Wooster is hit by a double whammy engaged to Madelaine Bassett and forced to stand as a Conservative M.P. Can even Jeeves save him this time?
Book X-overs - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,856 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 3 - Published: 3/13/2007
Jeeves and the Cowes Week Cad
To help out a friend, Bertie Wooster attends the Cowes Week sailing regatta and finds himself up to his neck in trouble.
Book X-overs - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,062 - Published: 2/13/2007 - Complete
Jeeves and the Marxist Cat Burglar reviews
On hoilday in Monte Carlo, Bertie Wooster encounters a beautiful cat burglar, and gets caught in the middle of an audacious jewelry heist.
Book X-overs - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,811 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 2 - Published: 2/1/2007 - Complete
Jeeves and the Fake Plastic Flowers reviews
Gamesmanship on the golf course leads Bertie Wooster to seek an unorthodox revenge.
X-overs - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,068 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 12/13/2006 - Complete
Jeeves and the Loony Doctor reviews
Bobbie Wickham, a childrens party and a loony doctor conspire to land Bertie Wooster deep in the soup.
TV X-overs - Rated: K - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,777 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 8/23/2006 - Complete
Jeeves and the Cheating Gutbucket reviews
A simple egg and spoon race descends into chaos and violence when Bertie Wooster gets involved.
TV X-overs - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,497 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 2 - Published: 8/15/2006 - Complete
Jeeves and the Gangsta Rap reviews
Bertie Wooster becomes infatuated with rap music, much to Jeeves' displeasure.When Bobbie Wickham lands Bertie in the soup, will Jeeves rally round?
TV X-overs - Rated: K - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,533 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 5 - Published: 4/12/2006 - Complete
Not At Home to Ms Broody reviews
A chance remark during a game of charades ignites the maternal urge in Grace. While Jack's showbiz connections aren't as solid as he'd hoped.
Will and Grace - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,067 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 1 - Published: 9/16/2004
The Jerry Doll reviews
Jerry confronts himself in miniature. Kramer senses a business oportunity. George is humiliated on national tv and finds he's become a celebrity.
Seinfeld - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,649 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 3 - Published: 3/16/2004
The Return of the Soup Nazi reviews
The Soup Nazi returns. The gang try to keep the news from Elaine. But she has her own problems - Crazy Joe Davola's back in town.
Seinfeld - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,643 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 3 - Published: 2/12/2004
The Diary of George reviews
George's attempt to write a diary ends in disaster. Elaine meets a man who breaks the 'code'. Jerry and Kramer fall foul of the Library Cop.
Seinfeld - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,854 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 4 - Published: 11/3/2003
The California Job reviews
Jerry lands a comedy gig in California. George, Elaine and Kramer accompany him to Los Angeles.
Seinfeld - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,104 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 10/2/2003
Vernon Dursley and the Laws of Libel reviews
The Dursley's decide to sue JK Rowling for libel.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 856 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/31/2003
The One With the Ouija Board reviews
The gang use Phoebe's ouija board to contact the dead. Ross antagonises Elvis Presley. But Nostradamus has a spooky prediction. And it starts coming true.
Friends - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,601 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 3 - Published: 6/24/2003
The One With the Star Trekathon reviews
Ross and Chandler watch every episode of Star Trek back to back. Joey has a hot new girlfriend, whose underwear has a strange fascination for Rachel. (Set before Rachel's pregnancy)
Friends - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,416 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/17/2003
Harry and the Weezerbeak Chase
Harry is partnered with Cho Chang in the Hogwarts Weezerbeak Chase. Can he suppress his feelings, cope with Draco Malfoy's cheating and still win the contest?
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,427 - Published: 6/14/2003
Grace the Moll reviews
Grace's prison penpal escapes and takes Will hostage. Jack is intimidated by a snooty English salesman and enlists Karen's help to cut him down to size.
Will and Grace - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,743 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 1 - Published: 6/9/2003
Tupelo Jack reviews
Jacks lands the lead role in 'Tupelo Tales', a play about the young Elvis. Will and Grace compete for the attention of Jose, the handsome understudy.
Will and Grace - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,842 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Published: 6/7/2003
The Grass Skirt reviews
*NEW* Kramer and George start a new religion - the Church of Kramerica. Jerry has underwear trouble with an attractive new tenant. Elaine wears a grass skirt.
Seinfeld - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,510 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 4 - Published: 6/3/2003
Harry's Horror Haircut reviews
Snape decides Harry's hair is too long and orders him to get it cut. Ron and Hermione help out, but their magic goes awry.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,137 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 6 - Published: 6/2/2003
A Man Called Horse reviews
*Revised and complete* Will and Jack suspect Grace is dating a notorious gay called Henry the horse. Jack finds The One - again!-but Karen wrecks it.
Will and Grace - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,739 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 5 - Published: 5/31/2003 - Complete
The Laryngitis reviews
*NEW* Kramer loses his voice. George's dip in a jacuzzi is an embarrassing experience. Elaine decides she'd like a little less conversation in the bedroom.
Seinfeld - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,034 - Reviews: 9 - Published: 5/28/2003
The Beatle Pillows reviews
*NEW* A Beatle fan causes problems for Jerry and Elaine. George irritates astronaut Buzz Aldrin. Kramer and Jackie Chiles sue a pogostick company.
Seinfeld - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,538 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 4 - Published: 5/20/2003
The Fetish reviews
Jerry offends a magician. Elaine's feet become objects of affection. George blows his second chance with Marisa Tomei.
Seinfeld - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,081 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/15/2003 - Complete
The Hooker reviews
A hooker causes trouble for Elaine. Jerry has oral problems. Kramer juices his meals and George contemplates his final resting place.
Seinfeld - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,474 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 5 - Published: 3/20/2003
The Vampire Boyfriend reviews
Kramer and Newman suspect Elaine's new boyfriend is a vampire.
Seinfeld - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,517 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/25/2003
The Swimming Pool reviews
The gang visit a swimming pool. (This script is loosely based on 'The Parking Garage' episode.)
Seinfeld - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,231 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 2 - Published: 2/12/2003
The Ultimate Catfight reviews
Kramer builds a boxing ring in his apartment. George pretends to be blind to get a date. Elaine has the biggest catfight of her life.
Seinfeld - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,474 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 2 - Published: 2/3/2003
The Mockney reviews
Jerry's girlfriend has an infuriating M and M habit. Elaine dates a cockney. George thinks he's discovered a cure for baldness.
Seinfeld - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,102 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 8 - Published: 1/30/2003
The Hollywood reviews
Jerry has language problems, Elaine gets a hollywood, Kramer constructs a matchstick statue of liberty and George dates a very tall woman.
Seinfeld - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,772 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 2 - Published: 1/22/2003
The Reclining Odalisque reviews
Elaine is upset when an artist paints her nude and takes drastic action to destroy the painting.
Seinfeld - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,808 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 1 - Published: 12/26/2002
Joel-Gomes (22)
Peptuck (29)