Author has written 6 stories for Pokémon, Oliver & Company, Digimon, My Little Pony, Minecraft, and Halo.
Oliver & Company:
New Understanding: After Dodger tells the group to split into teams of 2, Oliver and Rita are paired up. When they accidently get lost when trying to find shelter after a storm hits, a strong wind sends a glass shard into the air. Oliver saves Rita from the glass missile, but he gets a terrible laceration across his back. Now Rita has to nurse Oliver back to health, find shelter from the storm, and find a way back home. Boundaries will vanish and the two will soon gain a new understanding of each other.
Friendship and Love Run Deep: Follow Zane, a Zoroark Pokemorph, as he goes from being a philosophical Zorua to an easily embarrassed and shy University student. What'll happen when he winds up sharing a home with his old friend Nina and 4 other girls who don't know the meaning of "personal space"? Hopefully the training and guidance of Sawyer, A Sawsbuck who is his beloved uncle and current guardian, along with the love and friendship of his friends: Xander, a laidback Luxray, Nina, a determined yet carefree Ninetales, Brandon, a powehouse and "big brother" in the shape of a Floatzel, Maria, a fast and agile yet emotional Mightyena, and Flora, a caring and fragile Flygon, will be able to help him survive the out of control rollercoaster he calls his life.
Halo: New Journey: After drifting in space for almost a year, Master Chief is soon located by the Arbiter, but something goes wrong with the small rescue ship and now they have no choice but to crash land on the unknown planet below them. When Team Galactic discovers the crash site, they try to take Master Chief and Arbiter prisoner, but both of them are quickly saved by a young Pokemon explorer named Nolan Charleston. Now the trainer must protect the soldier and the warrior until he can find a way to get them off the planet before Team Galactic decides to retaliate and destroy everything in order to find the Sangheili and Spartan.
The Lost Warrior: After waking up in Shinjuku Park, an AssassinRenamon wakes up with only the memory that he was once human and that he is in what he thought was a cartoon he used to watch. Hopefully, he can survive getting chased by the Tamers and somehow convince them he is friendly. But this Digimon harbors a past filled with blood, guns, and death, and that past just might catch back up to him. New friends will be made, new enemies will be made, and Hatch Striker, the only known AssassinRenamon, will have to rely on his wits to keep himself alive.
My Little Pony:
Hunter of the Passion: His name is Revenant Hunter, an Alicorn that was once destined to be royalty, but he instead became an explorer, running away from home and Canterlot in the process. He was determined to visit the best known locations, trying to keep his distance from Princess Celestia when she tries to look for him to convince the young colt to come back home. A few years later, he now lives outside of Ponyville in a two-story home with his pegasus daughter Passion Spirit. They both harbor a terrible and painful secret that nopony has ever known. They are determined to keep their pasts hidden from prying eyes. That is, until they met the Mane 6.
My Little Pony/Fallout 3 crossover:
Guard Dog: It was supposed to have been a simple teleportation experiment for Twilight. All she needed to do was see if a little science and magic would allow her to teleport herself, her friends, and a few supplies over a long distance. Instead, it lead to disaster. Now they find themselves in the ruins of Washington D.C., being chased by murderous, irradiated freaks called Super Mutants, only to be saved by a stranger calling himself Down Range, who was on his way to his hidden sniper's nest located in an office building next to Galaxy News Radio. Can they get back to their home? Can Down Range keep the innocent ponies from losing their virtues in the Capital Wasteland? And what will happen when the sweet little ponies meet the Voice in the darkness?
We're the Angels of Life: Zatharos isn't the only angel in our world. That is exactly what Aiden Lee found out when he came in contact with Saint Raphael the Archangel in his dreams. At first, he thought it was just that, a dream. But when he learns about a paramilitary group that is moving through the Rocky Mountains, the angel within him begins to manifest and give him powers. Not only that, but he feels as though someone is following him, just outside his field of vision. He needs to learn how to control his powers and find out what it is that Saint Raphael is trying to tell him.
My Little Pony/World of Tanks crossover:
Ponies of Tanks: It was supposed to be just another day of doing gladiatorial battles in tanks, but near the end of a match, six tanks and their crews are somehow dragged into a world of ponies and friendship. Tanks and ponies just don't seem to mix in an existence devoted to love and tolerance. But unknown to them all, The Nightmare is making its return, and it will do anything to take the throne.
World of Tanks:
AFK: Why is so hard to simply enjoy a nice round of World of Tanks without something happening? This was Leo Knight's last thought before a white flash and the sense of falling knocked him out. Now he wakes up with a group of men looking down at him. Is that Sgt. Bunyon? And...is that Cpl. Puddephat? And...is THAT A TANK?!
Our Finest Hour: I have grown tired of these 'games'. They think they can use us like little playthings, use us to amuse their investors and those rabid mongrels that pose as fans of our battles. We are the modern gladiators, fighting with lions of steel and arrows of fire. But like the Roman Empire, Wargaming Incorporated will fall. We are the gladiators of the Goliath Clan, conquerors of over half of the battle arenas in Europe. We are also the trustful allies of the Lucky 7's and the Pandemonium Clan who we have split the claims of our lands with. My team numbers in the 80s, my crews ever loyal to me. But this never ending battle of tank vs. tank must stop! I have grown sick and weary of watching my brothers die, all for the sake of entertainment. But it is about time the creations betray their master. We have these tanks, these supplies, and these piles of gold and silver. We may be in the modern world, but we have fallen into the Dark Ages. We must fight for our freedom! And I will lead us all into our finest our.
Collecting the Whole Set: I am but one of many others, scrapped. A failure because I had 'free will' as those scientists called it. I was once Elwood Bergson, a known weapons designer, despite being only 23. I didn't really care for it all. Especially for that stupid ADAM that people were throwing their money away for just so that they could be slimmer or attract girls. Bullshit if you ask me. I thought Rapture would've been a good place to stay in seclusion, but nooooo, I attract the attention of Andrew Ryan, likely the person I would rather throw out the window into the ocean instead of being in the same district. He simply asks if I could help him with some project involving a creation called 'Big Daddy', I tell him where he can go shove it, and now I find myself a glorified Big Daddy, part of the Alpha Series apparently. I was now known as 'Subject Epsilon', a secondary prototype after Subject Delta, the first real Big Daddy to bond with a Little Sister. I was nicknamed 'Grand Daddy', because the other Alpha Series were supposedly my 'children' or whatever the hell they claimed. The other Big Daddies actually LISTENED to me like a frickin' Little Sister wanting to play! I wasn't the first Grand Daddy either. I was placed beside the other Alpha Series, who also seemed to be sentient like me. I was usually beside Subject Iota, Subject Theta, and Subject Phi.
I am now awake from a coma in a rundown hospital, alone, with only my drill and suit that I've been placed in. I can't stand the pain, the thoughts of rescuing the others that were the closest to family that I've ever had. I must find the others, and we must get to the surface and let the ocean take back this accursed place of nothing but bloodshed and insanity. I keep hearing someone named 'Holloway' over the PA system. Maybe it would be best to take her too, I don't want to leave such a sweet lady in this hellhole. After all, my pappy taught me better before someone bashed his brains in with a wrench because he had a case of ADAM on him. I want to wake up from this fucking nightmare, but only arousing the others from their sleep, rescuing the rest of the Little Sisters, and retrieving any survivors will save our souls from the cold and unforgiving hands that is Rapture. May God have mercy on whoever tries to get in my way.
A New Engineer: What can I say? That I was an 18 year old young man that didn't believe in Santa Claus? Of course it was all I could say, because, sure, I didn't believe in all the Santa Claus-being-real stuff, but I could believe in the Christmas spirit that everyone carries. It would seem that that was the reason why they came to me. The two Engineers and the Conductor. I could never tell if it was just dreams, but ever since last Christmas, I've dreamt of seeing a large black locomotive pulling behind it beautifully painted passenger cars through the Arctic snow on a moonlit night. But on Christmas Eve of the next year, I'm awoken by hissing steam, bright lights, and the musical sound of steel wheels clinking and clanking together. They're here for me now. I'm...to become the new engineer of the Polar Express. I can control the locomotive's powers and shape the train how I see fit. When you meet me on the streets, I'm Mason Jackson, but on the Polar Express...call me 'Jack'.
Across the Plains: When Double D's favorite cousin, Grigori Zolnerowich, a Russian speaking man of age 25, comes by for a visit, he announces that he will be taking his favorite cousin Double D and his two friends, Eddy and Ed, on a road trip across the country. He promises sights that not even a great painter can put on a canvas. Grigori even invites Nazz and Kevin along, since they both also seem interested in the idea. Grigori will also bring his best friend, Alexzandera Aldwin, a girl of 23, and his German Shepherd, Razor. How long will it take until the Eds have successfully spread their mayhem across the plains? My guess: in the next 15 miles.
My Little Pony:
Watching Over Them: When Twilight Sparkle attempts to demonstrate a long distance teleportation spell with her best friends and the two Princesses spectating, something goes wrong and they are all teleported to planet Earth. Specifically, Glendive, Montana. Even more specifically, into the home of 19 year old Chase Cruz, a recent high school graduate and major Brony. Now he has to keep an eye on the ponies until they find a way back. The only problem is that his parents and younger brother will be back in two weeks from a trip to Minneapolis and his older brother will be back home from working on the rigs in only a couple of days. Unless his older brother can keep a secret, then things are definitely going to get FUBAR really fast for Chase, the Mane 6, and the Princesses.
The Beat of a Heart: Beat Mix was supposed to be the next big thing, the next main event, but now, she feels like nothing. No home, no money, no nothing. All because she was sued by a rich bastard who went to the nightclub she was performing at and got his eardrums blown out by her music, despite her warnings to stay clear of the speakers. He made it his destiny to ruin her life, and now, he has succeeded and then some. Cold, malnourished, sick, homeless, Beat Mix just wants to die on the streets of Canterlot. But during a terrible storm, in a moment of final weakness, she is finally given a view of the light in the darkness. Now, she wants everything back, and she WILL strive to get it all back. And no one will stop her. And perhaps a little help from local hotshot DJ-Pon3 wouldn't be too bad either.
Modern Wafare 3:
Chasing a Poltergeist: They only went by the codename 'The Paranormal', because nobody knew who they were, nobody could catch them, and when someone got close, they only seemed to disappear at the last minute. They followed behind the path of destruction left by any military, picking up the pieces and the leftovers. Guns, ammunition, body armor, vehicles, equipment, even wounded personal. If they could get their hands on it, they would use it. They would say "It's amazing how many UGV's the military leaves behind instead of fixing it.". The Paranormal were loyal to no one, but only attacked those that were enemies to them. They were there when New York was attacked by the Russians, they were on board the Ilyushin Il-96-300PU, codename Command Point, when the Russian President Boris Vorshevsky was kidnapped, they were there during the gas bombing of London, they navigated the sandstorm in Bosaso, Somalia in order to aid Task Force 141, they were the ones to defend Delta Squad as they made their stand at the mine in Eastern Siberia, and they were even the ones to help Captain Price and Yuri as they made their way through the Hotel Oasis to kill Makarov. They are the shadow you see in the corner of your eye, they are that dead body you thought you saw moving, they are that one bullet that saves your life, they are the second gunman on the grassy knoll, they are The Paranormal. And they will make sure the job gets done. You can only hope that they are your guardian angel, and not your grim reaper.
Get in the Game!: Jack 'Jackie' Dusan simply wanted to play Modern Warfare 3 in order to blow off some steam, chat with friends, and maybe beat some noobs at their own noob tubin' game. But when a lightning bolt strikes Infinity Ward HQ and hits the servers, Jackie and some of his friends are yanked into the game itself! Now they are stuck in the game, with 5 other players, with no idea of what to do. Only with the clothes on their backs and the equipment their soldiers were using, they must try to find a way back out of the game.
They're Looking for Us: A young 1982 GMC Caballero by the name of Keith Messiah lived a pretty normal life in a pretty normal neighborhood. That is, until he got into a fight with an aggressive Corvette named Jason. Now, Jason wants to do nothing else but get rid of Keith. The Caballero is now on the run from Jason and his goons. At least Jackie, a female 2010 Dodge Charger, Lloyd, a male 2000 GMC Sierra with dual rear wheels, old-timer Darl, a 1964 Jeep Wagoneer, and finally, Coty, a rare Local Motors Rally Fighter, have his back. He will run, and they will run with him. Soon, the trip and chase take him to the well known town of Radiator Springs. Maybe they can help the group of misfits get away from the insane Corvette named Jason.
Saints Row: The Third:
My New Life With The Saints: He was young, almost too innocent to join the Third Street Saints, but they let him join anyway on the account that he was Johnny Gat's nephew. He was quiet and timid to the point that he wouldn't even go into rooms with more than a few people, but he made it up by being the best shot with a high powered rifle and pistol that they had ever seen. His parents were killed by ex-Ronins and the experience had left him somewhat traumatized and gave him bad trust issues. The way Pierce and Shaundi see it, The Boss let this kid join out of pity more than anything else. He didn't even tell them his name, but after writing it down, they find out he goes by Jax. Now that the army and a few smaller gangs had joined together to try to eliminate the Saints, The Boss is gonna need all of the help he can get.
This kid may be good with a gun, but will he use it?
The Renegades: A somewhat normal family in the town of Glendive, Montana are in for a suprise of their lives when an Allspark fragment, that broke off from the original Allspark and was previously floating in space, crash lands on their street and explodes, bringing electronics and vehicles to life, including: a 2004 Harley Davidson Sportster named Road Runner, a 1982 GMC Caballero named Longshot, a 1981 Dodge Ram named Silver Claw, a 2006 Honda ATV named Long Arm, and even a Barnes and Noble Nook Color named Razor. Can the Whitmans survive being involved in the Transformer's conspiracy? Hopefully the assistance from the thought-to-be-dead Autobot Hot Shot, along with some new friends who may come along the journey, can help them survive a massive road trip all the way from Eastern Montana, through the Rocky Mountains, around the large forests of Oregon, across the dry deserts of Nevada, avoiding the obsessed UFO conspiracy theorists around Las Vegas, surviving the almost impossible heat and dryness of Death Valley, navigating the bustling highways of California, fighting off Decepticons on the historic path of Route 66, meeting a group of neutral Transformers in Baja California during the Baja 1000, and stealing an oil tanker and sailing the Pacific Ocean to Diego Garcia. The journey will be long and excruciating for the group, lets hope they don't kill each other before they get to Autobot base.
Same Race, Different Drivers: Even after the death of Warden Hennessey and the closure of Terminal Island Penitentiary, the spirit of Death Race will never die, it will just evolve. After being framed for a double homicide, ex-street racer and ex-car theif 17 year old Mark Lawson and his 15 year old brother and ex-mechanic Lucas Lawson are arrested and transferred to Phoenix Island Penitentiary, the new home of Death Race. After enduring the torment of Phoenix Island's prisoners, Mark and Lucas are soon placed under protection by former Terminal Island prisoner and and lead pit crew mechanic Coach and former Terminal Island prisoner and ex-Death Racer 14K. Soon, though, their records catch up to them and gain the attention of the island's warden, who is looking for new talent for the next Death Race. With the promise of freedom after winning 5 races for the Lawson brothers, along with anyone who is on their pit crew, Mark and Lucas will try to survive the 8 round race and win their freedom. With Coach and 14K being their respective crew chiefs, the brothers will have to bend their own morals just to survive the other drivers of Death Race. As long as they both win a combined amount of 5 races, they will finally see the sunlight again. But will the warden, or the racers, make it that easy for them?
Ed, Edd, n' Eddy/Pokemon Crossover:
The Eds and The Legends: After a fight breaks out between Dialga and Palkia, their combined attacks create a portal that leads to The Eds' dimension. The resulting aftershocks soon suck The Eds and the neighborhood kids into the Hall of Origin during one of the Legends' Meetings. With both Dialga and Palkia weakened after their argument, the kids of the cul-de-sac are now stuck in the Pokemon world until the Legends of Time and Space fully recover. What resulting chaos will ensue when you have great and powerful Legends and a bunch of kids in the same room? We can only hope The Eds don't drive Arceus to destroy the world.
Red vs Blue: Release: He didn't want anything to do with Project Freelancer. He didn't want to do their missions, do their simulations, or do the killing for them. He thought he could trust Agent Texas and Agent Washington, but they betrayed him in the end. Now he has no one. Now he could only trust his two AI's and himself. Well, he could trust his own team, that he knew without a doubt, but...well, the Alpha team that Washington was a part of never liked competition when it came to the leaderboards. With only an old and non-standard issue Webley Mk IV Revolver, a combat knife, his armor, and a stolen Warthog, he runs from Freelancer and only hopes that they never find him. He soon finds an outpost called Valhalla. He's heard many things from this particular band of Red and Blue soldiers. Maybe they can help him. His name is Agent Montana, and with Eta and Mu watching over him, he may just survive being AWOL. And maybe, just maybe, he'll find his missing team members. Only then, will he be released from the grip hate has on him.
Cats & Dogs/The Lion King crossover:
Lost, But Not Alone: When a cargo plane carrying a group of military trained dogs and D.O.G. field agents, that were gathered from different law enforcement and anti-terrorist organizations, called XC Company goes down over Africa, they become seperated from each other and a Blue Heeler named Max, a German Shepard named Delilah, and a large Gray wolf named Kliment are rescued by the rulers of the Pride Lands. Can the group reunite before something bad happens to themselves and their comrades? Only with the help from Simba and his pride can they survive in unknown territory.
I am currently looking for vehicle designs and models for my Transformers story. I plan on introducing over 15 different transformers into the story. If you have any vehicle ideas, I'm all ears. That includes: cars, trucks, motorcycles, tanks, trains, and aircraft. There will also be triple changers.
These are the Transformers:
Wreckage: Trophy Truck
That's how far I've gotten in the last couple of months. If you think you have better vehicle form ideas, I'm open to suggestions. Spread the word and PM me if you have any ideas.
OC Biographies and Information:
The Lost Warrior:
Hatch Striker (AssassinRenamon):
Name: AssassinRenamon AKA Hatch Striker
If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa copy this into your profile.
92 percent of American teens would die if Abecrombie and Fitch told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy this into your profile if you would be in the 8 percent laughing their heads off at the others.
98 of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.
Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Yavie Aelinel, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Shadow929, SweetNCrazieSugarmuffin, The Komodo Dragon Phoenix, Empress Caroline of Tamaran, Arle Nadja, GirlWaterShaman, Black Tribal
If you think that those stupid kids should just give that God-forsaken Trix rabbit some Trix, copy this into your profile.
Too many kids and teenagers have smoked or tried marijuana. If you haven't, copy and paste this onto your profile.
This is Bunny. I got him from someone else. Copy and paste Bunny into your profile or signature to help him gain world domination.
We might be able to stop Flamers!
But I need your help!
It's obvious that flamers are really just immature people with nothing better to do. If you're mature enough to take a flame, ignore the flamer, and repress the urge to strike back, then copy and paste this in your profile, and add your name to the list: RoyalFanatic, Kitayl, GirlWaterShaman, Black Tribal
98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile.
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If you're against animal cruelty (horse slaughter, bear bating, dolphin hunting, chimp slavery etc.) then copy this into your profile!
If you don't watch Laguna Beach or the O.C. or The Hills regularily, never have, never will, and are proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you think you have too many of these "copy and paste this into your profile" thingies, but have no intention of stopping now, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you're bored, and wish to subject others into wasting about 5 seconds of their lives, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever tripped down the stairs copy this into your profile.
30 percent of kids go to college. The other 70 either drop-out or don't have the proper skills to. If you're on of the 30 percent that you know you're going to go to college, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.
If you are aware that so many people nowadays pretend to be someone they're not, copy this on your profile.
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUDGE! ... copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy this into your profile.
If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random or anything similar, copy this into your profile.
If you think little siblings are annoying, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever slapped your self on the head and/or banged your head on a table for no reason put this on your profile.
If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.
If you are obsessed with fan fiction copy this into your profile.
If you think that writing Fanfic stories is fun then copy this onto your profile!
If you have a story in your head, copy and paste this into your profile
There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If
If fan fiction is to you what MySpace is to other people, copy this onto your profile.
If your profile is a never-ending state of change, copy this onto your profile.
1F YOU C4N UND3R574ND 7H15 M355463, COPY 4ND P4573 17 1N70 YOUR PROF1L3.
If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever fallen asleep in a class, paste this to your profile.
If you get a kick out of explosions, copy and paste this to your profile.
If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever gotten so completely sidetracked in a conversation that you don't remember why you were talking in the first place, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile.
If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile
There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile.
.••) .•).•.•) .•)
If you have every been in a website that is rated T when your only ten copy and paste this to your profile.
If you know someone who is four and watches movies rated PG-13 copy and paste this to your profile.
If you have ever begged your parents for something so much they get frustrated and buys you the thing you were begging for copy and paste this to your profile.
SMILEYS RULE:):)copy and paste this in your profile if you agree. :):):):):):)!
even when you can't see him GOD is there! If you believe in GOD put this in your profile.
For people that hate stereotypes: If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile. (BOLD the ones you are.)
I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
But most of all
Ladies/ always complain and gripe to their friends that there is never any good guys out there, and they always end up with assholes who mistreat them. Well ladies, next time you're complaining, maybe look up to see who you're complaining to, maybe that special someone is right there hanging on your every word as usual, screaming in his head "Why won't you give me a chance?"
If you're a guy and you agree with this letter, copy and paste into your profile as 'I'm sorry'
If You're one of the FEW girls with enough BALLS to copy and paste this into your profile, and you would never make your guy feel this way, copy and paste into your profile as 'Girls Don't Realize These Things'
If you are a person who values the QUALITY of your freinds over the QUANTITY of them, copy and paste to your profile.
A girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle
Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?
HATE PEOPLE WHO ARE DIFFERENT? CONSIDER THE FOLLOWING:
It's the same story everyday: A girl in dark colors gets off the worst bus you can imagine, you know, the one with all the dumber-than-dirt country kids who are swearing every five words, listening to a punk rock/gothic rock/heavy metal/or any other dark music. She shuts off the cd player/MP3/ipod and walks into the school. You and your friends are standing inside because you're too wussy to stand outside in LATE MAY in you pretty new Capri pants and new Hollister t-shirt.
You point at her and whisper to your friends about how out-of-touch she is because she's dressed in a baggy hooded sweatshirt and frayed old jeans and she's maintaining a 3.785-4.0 GPA on a 4.0 scale while you're boardline failing. You loudly insult her and talk to her in an obnoxious voice. She just keeps her head down and shuffles right by.
You laugh loudly and say, "How could you have gotten that one wrong? Even a fifth grader knows that!" when she answers a question wrong in class. You and friends push her around in the hallways and trip her in the stairwells. You think she should start drooling over the boys at school and should wear the same clothes you do.
And yet, no matter what you do, she doesn't say anything.
Isn't it hilarious that she can be quiet all week, but still have to put up with more shit than the whore giving out free blowjobs on the bus? ISN'T IT FUNNY that you don't mind fucking a random guy every night, but you go around ripping on her just because she studies in the library every night? Isn't it just bloody fucking hilarious that she needs to sign a pass to the bathroom just to run into an empty classroom to cry at least once a week?
Are you laughing yet?
HAVE YOU EVER CONSIDERED WHAT HER LIFE IS LIKE?
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU GO UP TO HER FACE AND TRASH HER GOOD NAME, CALLING HER A 'FREAKY GOTH WANNABE' OR A 'WEEPY-WASHY ATTENTION SEEKER', AND NOT ONCE STOP AT ALL TO CONSIDER WHY YOU NEVER SEE HER PARENTS AROUND, OR WHY SHE ALWAYS WEARS LONG SLEEVES, EVEN IN THE SUMMER?
This is a true story. All schools have a class clown, someone that gets on everyones nerves and that no one likes. There was one of these boys in this one school. Nobody liked him at all. He had no friends, the teachers hated him for his disruptiveness, and the students found him annoying beyond belief. He never seemed to care. One day, he had finally stepped on his teachers last nerve. What the teacher did was make everyone in the class stand up and tell the boy something they didn't like about him. As each of the thirty students stood up and said something about him they didn't like, he only sat and didn't seem to mind. All of the students did it.
That day, when school was out, the boy went home, grabbed his dads gun, and shot himself in the head.
If you think that the teacher was to blame, and that what she did was morally wrong and completely shameful, copy and paste this into your profile. Then, if you would have been the one to stand up and say "I'm not going to do this" then add your username to the list.
Take your time and see if you can read each line aloud without a mistake. The average person can't.
Now go back and read the THIRD word in each line from the top down and I bet you can't resist passing it on.
I Have A Few Questions . . .
Funny Bumper Stickers
I'm still hot. It just come in flashes.
My other vehicle is in orbit.
Remember: It's pillage first, then burn.
It's my cat's world. I'm just here to open cans.
Just keep staring - I may do a trick.
Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.
Coffee makes it possible to get out of bed; chocolate makes it worth it.
My dog is smarter than your honor student.
If all else fails, stop using all else.
Don't drink and derive, alcohol and calculus don't mix.
What would Scooby do?
Bottomless pit of wants and needs.
I'm so old that "getting lucky" means finding my car in the parking lot.
Buckle up - it makes it harder for the aliens to snatch you from your car.
A PBS mind trapped in an MTV world.
Welcome to Middle Earth. Now go home.
Officer, will this bumper sticker saying Support Law Enforcement save me from getting a ticket?
The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.
If I had a life, I wouldn't need a bumper sticker.
These are actual instruction labels from certain comsumer goods...
On Sears hairdryer:
This is weird, but interesting! If you can raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too. Cna yuo raed tihs? Olny 55 plepoe out of 100 can I'm one of them. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed erveylteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!Paste this to your profile if you can read this!
"If you think that nothing is impossible, then you've obviously never tried slamming a revolving door."
Friends vs best friends (Dedicated to Chubs34's bro, K-Z)
Friend: Will help me find my way when I'm lost
20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity
Your One and Only Wish
(Yes, all of the above was from Nigella00(Who keeps it as "nigella00", but out of respect I capitalize. Or just my standards.))
1 - YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (first three letters of your name and 'izzle')
Dilizzle (that's kinda weird)
2 - YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (favourite colour and favourite animal)
Silver Coyote (cooooollll!)
3 - YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (your middle name and the street you live on)
Lee Nowlan (again, cooooollll!)
4 - YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first three letters of your last name, first two letters of your first)
Kaddi (that's actually my actual nickname, except that the 'i' should be a 'y'.)
5 - YOUR SUPERHERO NAME: (your second favorite colour, and favourite drink)
Silver Coke (What?! That could be taken the wrong way.)
6 - YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (your parents' middle names)
Lee Darcel (I could work with that.)
7 - YOUR GOTH NAME: (bloody and your pet's name)
Bloody Skeeter (Most skeeters [mosquitos] are bloody when you squish them.)
Here's the rules: Get your Ipod or Mp3, put it on shuffle and hit next to get the answer to each question, just put the title of the song, and no cheating, put whatever comes up.
What's your name?
So Far Away-Crossfade
I have no way to respond to that.
What do you like to do for fun?
I just want to stay away from people.
What are you afraid of?
Side of a Bullet-Nickelback
Because who isn't afraid of getting shot.
What kind of people are you attracted to?
Pain-Three Days Grace
I am not attracted to those kind of people.
What's your style?
Girl's Eyes-Eve 6
I can't even respond correctly to that one.
What do you think about?
I can't help but wonder how long the empty road is.
What's your goal in life?
Joker and The Thief-Wolfmother
I just want to joke around and steal things (NOT!)
What do you dream about?
Next 2 You-Buckcherry
I just want to be next to my girl, no matter what she puts me through.
What kind of food do you like?
Hanging by a Moment-Lifehouse
Is the answer claiming that I like food that is close to either dying or spoiling.
Where do you live?
"Highway Blues"-composer Marc Seales
I just can't resist adventure.
What do you do when you wake up in the morning?
I wake up thankful that I'm not in jail.
What do you do on vacation?
I think of ways I can apologize to people I have wronged.
What is your job?
I pick out apple trees for later.
If Obama called you on the phone what would you talk about?
I talk about what kind of freakin' awesome party we'll have this afternoon.
If you were the president of the United States?
I would pass a law that would make me a permanent president.
What's your motto?
I always say that motto when I walk away from a girl who won't leave me the hell alone.
At age 8, your dad buys you an ice cream. You thanked him by dripping
When you were 9 years old, he paid for piano lessons. You thanked him
When you were 10 years old he drove you all day, from soccer to
When you were 11 years old, he took you and your friends to
When you were 12 years old, he warned you not to watch
When you were 13, he suggested a haircut that was in fashion.
When you were 14, he paid for a month away at summer camp.
When you were 15, he came home from work, looking for a hug.
When you were 16, he taught you how to drive his car. You
When you were 17, he was expecting an important call. You thanked him
When you were 18, he cried at your high school graduation. You thanked
When you were 19, he paid for your college tuition, drove you to campus
When you were 25, he helped to pay for your wedding, and he told you
When you were 50, he fell ill and needed you to take care of him . You
And then, one day, he quietly died. And everything you never did came
Two traveling angels stopped to spend the night in the home of a
The family was rude and refused to let the angels stay in the
The next night the pair came to rest at the house of a very poor,
When the sun came up the next morning the angels found the farmer and his
“Things aren’t always what they seem,” the older angel replied.
Sometimes that is exactly what happens when things don’t turn out
Repost this if you agree with it.
SOMEBODY'S RAISING THEIR KID RIGHT!
One Nation, 'Under Allah.'
RACISM IS WRONG!
Racism is wrong and can often times destroy people's self confidence. It's a horrible and cruel way to treat people. To prove that we are all alike, try this simple experiment: Hold your hand up to a light of some kind. You'll see a shadow cast nearby. Now, have someone of a different race hold their hand up too. You'll see, essentially, the same image. Five fingers and a palm. Skin color doesn't matter when you get right down to it. If you are against racism, copy this message and my symbol for equality to your profile.
The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...
My Favorite and Most Used Threat: "If you don't shut the hell up, I swear from Heaven to High Hell that I will shove my boot so far up your ass that the heel will be touching the back of your frickin' teeth!!!!"
(From nigella00, had to change a few things to match me.)
If you think the following story is sad copy and paste it in your profile
Mommy...Johnny brought a gun to school,
He told his friends that it was cool,
And when he pulled the trigger back,
It shot with a great, huge .
Mommy, I was a good , I did what I was told,
I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold!
When I went to school that day,
I never said good-bye.
I'm sorry that I had to go, But Mommy, please don't cry.
When Johnny shot the gun, he hit me and another,
And all because Johnny, got the gun from his brother.
Mommy, please tell Daddy; That I love him very much,
And please tell Zoey; my girlfriend; That it wasn't just a crush.
And tell my brothers; That they are the only ones now,
And tell my dear sweet grandfather; I'll be waiting for him now
And tell my wonderful friends; That they always were the best
Mommy, I'm not the first, I'm no better than the rest
Mommy, tell my teachers; I won't show up for class,
And never to forget this, And please don't let this pass
Mommy, why'd it have to be me? No one, though. deserves this.
But mommy, it's not fair, I left without a kiss.
And Mommy tell the doctors; I know that they really did try
I think I even saw one doctor, trying not to cry.
Mommy, I'm slowly dying, with a bullet in my chest,
But Mommy please remember, I'm in heaven with the rest
When I heard that great, big , I ran as fast as I could
please listen to me if you would,
I wanted to go to college, I wanted to try things that were new
I guess I'm not going with Daddy, On that trip to the new zoo
I wanted to get married, I wanted to have a kid,
I wanted to be an actor, I really wanted to live.
But Mommy I must go now, The time is getting late,
Mommy, tell my Zoey, I'm sorry to cancel the date.
I love you Mommy, I always have, I know you know its true
And Mommy all I need to say is, "Mommy, I love you"
Random things you can do IN WALMART!
1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.
2. Set all the alarm clocks in Electronics to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, " 'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.
5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
9. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.
11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme song.
12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.
13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream.. "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!
16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "pikachu, I choose you!"
Repost this if you laughed... Or are planning to do any of these things
1.Put your iTunes (or iPod) on shuffle
25. WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
Down With the Sickness-Disturbed (My sickness causes me pain.)
24. IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?
Drown You Out-Crossfade (I would go back and choose to ignore that stupid idea you had.)
23.DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
Beth (1977)-Kiss (Even though I barely know her, she is a good friend)
22. WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
Welcome Home (Sanitarium)-Metallica (Waking up in a sanitarium and realizing that the first 17 years of my life is a lie and was just a crazy dream wouldn't only scare me, but it would make me go clinically insane.)
21.WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?
Simple Man-Shinedown (I just want to keep things simple and easy.)
20. WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
Here Without You-Three Doors Down (Being all alone without companionship would definitely make me cry.)
19. WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
I'm Burning For You-Blue Oyster Cult (I don't know why someone lighting themself on fire to prove their love is so funny to me.)
18. WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU WILL REGRET?
My Name is Jonas-Weezer (Naming my kid 'Jonas'.)
17. HOW WILL YOU DIE?
Life Wasted-Pearl Jam (I will die with no accomplishments in my life?! BULLSHIT!!)
16. WHAT IS THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
Bliss (I Don't Wanna Know)-Hinder (I just want to enjoy the blissful sensation of being with you and not knowing what the worst thing that could happen to me is.)
15. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
I'd Come for You-Nickelback (I would do anything to for my friends.)
14. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
Promise-Eve 6 (Sorry, I promised that I wouldn't tell what my biggest secret is.)
13.WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
Bring the Night On-Eve 6 (I love to go out and party.)
12. WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Wild-Eyed Southern Boy-38 Special (I may have been quiet, but I could really go crazy whenever I wanted to.)
11.WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
Don't Fear the Reaper-Blue Oyster Cult (I may be crazy, but please don't be afraid of having an untimely death by being with me.)
10.WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
Breathing-Lifehouse (They're just happy that I'm still alive.)
9.WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Just to Get High-Nickelback (Seeing the person I like is like being high on the strongest of drugs.)
8.WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
Are You Ready-Three Days Grace (I don't think I'm ready to know what I'll be.)
7.WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
Heres to the Night-Eve 6 (I just like to bring things to a closing and look back on the greatest of achivements that everyone has accomplished.)
6.WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Rockstar-Nickelback (I think that the person should be as great as a rockstar.)
5. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
Crazy on You-Heart (I can't really answer that question.)
4.WHAT IS 22?
Sweet Amber-Metallica (I freakin' suck at math.)
3. WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
Gotta Be Somebody-Nickelback (I always think that there is someone out there that is perfect for me and will do anything to make me happy.)
2. WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
Hero-Skillet (They think that I'm the embodiment of good in the world.)
1.WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
Where Eagles Have Been-Wolfmother (Soar as high as the eagles have in order to achieve your dreams.)
(This and below from Kain Sinner) Say the word "cow" before each word:
Now say the word "cow" after each word:
Now read it from the bottom up:
Put that on your profile if you're currently laughing at yourself for falling for that.
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