Hipster Blood Ritual
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Joined 08-16-11, id: 3166890, Profile Updated: 07-11-14
Author has written 11 stories for Doctor Who, Hetalia - Axis Powers, Sherlock, How to Train Your Dragon, Kuroshitsuji, and Radio Dramas.

Hello everyone. This is Hipster Blood Ritual, formerly known as Converse on the Tardis. I'd like to welcome everyone to my profile and stories, but also warn everyone that they are in for some serious disappointment. Even if you like my writing, I very rarely update my stuff. Sometimes, though, I get all excited and rejuvenated about writing, so we can all hope and pray for those moments of my life.

This summer's project is rewriting Uncharted. So I'll be updating the chapters as I finish them. The plot will be the same, but since I wrote the first chapter almost three years ago, I need to update the quality of the writing. That's all! I'm absolutely sure everyone will like the rewrite much better, anyway. But basically, don't panic when you see the chapters changing. I'm fully aware of and responsible for what's going on.

"Fanfiction is what literature might look like if it were reinvented from scratch after a nuclear apocalypse by a band of brilliant pop-culture junkies trapped in a sealed bunker. They don't do it for money. That's not what it's about. The writers write it and put it up online just for the satisfaction. They're fans, but they're not silent, couchbound consumers of media. The culture talks to them, and they talk back to the culture in its own language."

—Lev Grossman, TIME, July 18, 2011

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Performance in a Leading Role by MadLori reviews
AU. Sherlock Holmes is an Oscar winning actor in a career slump, John Watson is an Everyman actor trapped in date movies. When they are cast as a gay couple in a new film, will they surprise each other? Will their on-screen romance become reality?
Sherlock - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 21 - Words: 166,487 - Reviews: 1911 - Favs: 4,955 - Follows: 1,203 - Updated: 2/20/2014 - Published: 1/4/2012 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
Feeling Electric by ProfessorSpork reviews
She walks into the comic book store, and everything changes. An AU story. / "No!" she insists, but she's grinning and bumping his shoulder and he has never, ever talked to anyone like this before.
Doctor Who - Rated: K - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 23,853 - Reviews: 266 - Favs: 1,188 - Follows: 275 - Updated: 12/24/2013 - Published: 5/12/2010 - 10th Doctor, Rose T. - Complete
Music is the Inspiration by doctorrosetyler reviews
A new series of one-shots inspired by random songs. Each chapter is an individual story, named by the song that inspired it. 10/Rose
Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 7 - Words: 41,014 - Reviews: 88 - Favs: 125 - Follows: 85 - Updated: 3/6/2013 - Published: 1/25/2011 - 10th Doctor, Rose T.
Never Too Late by KCS reviews
Drabble series continuation of A Messy Business, continuing the original prompt involving overprotective!parental!Sherlock and cold-catching!wee!John. Warning for kidfic and ghastly amounts of fluff.
Sherlock - Rated: K - English - Family/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 13 - Words: 15,215 - Reviews: 238 - Favs: 555 - Follows: 698 - Updated: 7/26/2012 - Published: 11/29/2011 - Sherlock H., John W.
Christmas Interlude by KCS reviews
Technically an AU spin-off of A Messy Business and Never Too Late, mainly because timelines don't work to give tiny!John a first Christmas with Sherlock. Pretend AMB isn't set in September but rather December, and this is the result. Now complete.
Sherlock - Rated: K - English - Family/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 18 - Words: 32,211 - Reviews: 363 - Favs: 363 - Follows: 170 - Updated: 5/4/2012 - Published: 12/24/2011 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
I Do Believe by KCS reviews
Written for the post-REIC prompt: Five times Sherlock used a disguise to watch over the people he left behind, and one time he revealed himself.
Sherlock - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 10,863 - Reviews: 97 - Favs: 358 - Follows: 34 - Published: 1/28/2012 - Sherlock H. - Complete
The Light by Hattie Laraway
It's the start of every 'maybe' and every 'if'. It's wonderful, wicked but oh, so very kind. It's the light, in the dark abyss of time and space. One-shot.
Doctor Who - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 269 - Favs: 4 - Published: 12/29/2011 - Complete
Faith by SomethingOutOfNothing reviews
After losing another companion, the Doctor does something he hasn't done in a very long time. Oneshot.
Doctor Who - Rated: K - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 591 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/27/2011 - 10th Doctor - Complete
A Messy Business by KCS reviews
Story told through 221B drabble format, which I created for the ACD!Holmes fandom years ago. Written for LJ's Watson's Woes MiniWriMo. Kid!fic, so if that and fluff aren't your cup of tea feel free to skip this one.
Sherlock - Rated: K - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 30 - Words: 10,705 - Reviews: 223 - Favs: 455 - Follows: 114 - Updated: 11/24/2011 - Published: 11/1/2011 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete
Problem Children by IronicNarwhal reviews
Martha Hudson likes to think she's quite a tolerant babysitter. However, when faced with the double trouble of five-year-old super genius Sherlock Holmes, and his brother twelve-year-old political mastermind Mycroft, she finds herself beginning to crack.
Sherlock - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,310 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 91 - Follows: 103 - Published: 11/18/2011 - Mrs. Hudson
Locks by ApproximatelyPrecise reviews
Young Sherlock Holmes steals a lock picking kit. All the locked doors in his house are hard to resist, but will he like what he finds behind them? T to be safe.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Family - Chapters: 10 - Words: 20,205 - Reviews: 89 - Favs: 167 - Follows: 52 - Updated: 11/6/2011 - Published: 9/8/2011 - Sherlock H., Mycroft H. - Complete
Fear Itself by KCS reviews
Written for Challenge 018, creepy or scary Halloweenesque fic, at LiveJournal's watsons woes. John is accustomed to being kidnapped by now, but he never expected a criminal to adopt Mycroft's method of doing so, to ensure he comes along without a fight.
Sherlock - Rated: K+ - English - Suspense/Friendship - Chapters: 3 - Words: 12,289 - Reviews: 133 - Favs: 375 - Follows: 50 - Updated: 10/29/2011 - Published: 10/27/2011 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete
Don't Let Go by lauraxtennant reviews
The Doctor couldn't believe he'd done it. He'd finally got through. And all he could think about was getting to her. His focus was single-minded and unwavering; find Rose Tyler. It was actually easier than he thought fate might make it. Reunion Fic
Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 14,929 - Reviews: 250 - Favs: 288 - Follows: 304 - Updated: 10/26/2011 - Published: 8/8/2011 - 10th Doctor, Rose T.
Caught Fire by bite-me-im-irish reviews
'Love is a friendship that has caught fire.' How series two should have ended and how series three should have began!
Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 12 - Words: 40,998 - Reviews: 327 - Favs: 303 - Follows: 236 - Updated: 10/24/2011 - Published: 10/27/2010 - 10th Doctor, Rose T. - Complete
Green vs Blue by Daemon faerie queen reviews
When the Tenth Doctor starts beating his older self at 'sonic tag', Eleventh ups his game. Oneshot.
Doctor Who - Rated: K - English - Sci-Fi/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,232 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 2 - Published: 10/4/2011 - 11th Doctor, 10th Doctor - Complete
The Saints Can't Help Me Now by burningjackets reviews
A disease has ravaged the world, and John Watson, Sherlock Holmes, and Rory Williams are trying to find a cure. They come across a man named the Doctor, almost dead, and lots of angsty romance stuff happens on the way to a cure.
Crossover - Doctor Who & Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,166 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 9/11/2011 - Published: 9/3/2011 - 11th Doctor, Sherlock H.
Not My Doctor by Hattie Laraway reviews
'Alright, both of you, answer me this. When I last stood on this beach, on the worst day of my life, what was the last thing you said to me' Dårlig Ulv-Stranden. One-shot.
Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,200 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/24/2011 - 10th Doctor, Rose T. - Complete
Breathing Space by CaptainBri-Mazing reviews
Donna has witnessed someone come back to life before, but seeing two people come back to life just from the sight of the other, was something she would never ever forget
Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 4 - Words: 9,110 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 165 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 8/15/2011 - Published: 8/6/2011 - 10th Doctor, Rose T. - Complete
Two Rivers Meet on a Fairground by neverthesamegirl reviews
John Watson, River Song, and River Tam at a carnival shooting booth. Who will win the stuffed bear?
Crossover - Doctor Who & Sherlock - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,612 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/13/2011 - River Song/Melody P. III, John W. - Complete
Rose Comes First by Abboz reviews
Rose catches an Alien virus and the Doctor takes her back to Jackie's flat so they can both look after her. Jackie soon sees how much her daughter means to the Doctor and how happy he makes Rose. Oneshot. Ten/Rose.
Doctor Who - Rated: K - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,081 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 137 - Follows: 16 - Published: 8/12/2011 - 10th Doctor, Rose T. - Complete
Just A Dream by WhoMe-2 reviews
A kiss from Jackie Tyler can have serious consequences.
Doctor Who - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,000 - Reviews: 53 - Favs: 150 - Follows: 13 - Published: 7/12/2011 - 10th Doctor, Rose T. - Complete
Questions and Reassurance and Unexpected Plans by lauraxtennant reviews
Oneshot. Set whenever you see fit, after Journey's End. The Doctor and Rose have an interesting conversation in bed one morning. Hope you like! x
Doctor Who - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,282 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 81 - Follows: 4 - Published: 5/22/2011 - 10th Doctor Duplicate, Rose T. - Complete
The Frumious Cumberbatch by Rae666 reviews
'Twas dismal, and the sirened cars, Did wail and rumble in the street: Jabberwocky poem gets a Sherlockian makeover...
Sherlock - Rated: K - English - Parody/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 330 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 6 - Published: 4/28/2011 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete
One Man, One Woman by lauraxtennant reviews
"OW! Ow ow ow ow OW!" Rose yelped. "Rose! Rose. ROSE. Sit STILL. I can't help you if you're gonna wriggle around – just – wait! No. No, no, no. No, sit! Stay!" he commanded, grabbing a hold of one of her hips with his left hand, keeping her in place.
Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,075 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 208 - Follows: 23 - Published: 4/25/2011 - 10th Doctor, Rose T. - Complete
The Most Dangerous Game by chi-chi-chimera reviews
Serial Killer AU. Sherlock has never just played on the legal side of the law, and murder is just as fascinating however you approach it. But now he has John Watson to contend with. Still, he is a soldier. He has potential.
Sherlock - Rated: M - English - Crime/Horror - Chapters: 3 - Words: 27,146 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 185 - Follows: 39 - Published: 3/30/2011 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
Mistletoe for Crowley and Granby by renrenren3 reviews
Crowley doesn't like Christmas, doesn't like this party and doesn't like anyone in this room. Apart maybe from Granby.
Crossover - Good Omens & Temeraire - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,271 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 5 - Published: 2/21/2011 - A. Crowley - Complete
Kinds of Day by doctorrosetyler reviews
Rose finds the power inside herself to conquer her past and live her future. 10/Rose
Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Drama/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,720 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 7 - Published: 2/16/2011 - 10th Doctor, Rose T. - Complete
Fully Colored Monochrome by Yggi Marauder reviews
Ciel finds his days are monotonous and his nights are colored in monochrome, but Sebastian alone can bring color to his life. /oneshot, songfic, yaoi, rated m for a reason/
Kuroshitsuji - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,459 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 6 - Published: 2/2/2011 - Ciel P., Sebastian M. - Complete
Orbit by ProfessorSpork reviews
A simple day out for the Doctor, Rose, and Tony. Post-JE. / There are stars in her eyes, and wisdom in her smile. Rose/Doctor. Narrative poetry.
Doctor Who - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 671 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 19 - Published: 1/5/2011 - 10th Doctor Duplicate, Rose T. - Complete
Going Cold by MoreThingsInHeavenAndEarth reviews
"Lestrade didn't know about high-functioning sociopath, but a high-functioning drug addict Sherlock certainly was." An exploration of Sherlock on drugs and Lestrade fulfilling the role of somebody who cares. Angsty. Will be a two-shot.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 3 - Words: 4,449 - Reviews: 62 - Favs: 186 - Follows: 42 - Updated: 9/7/2010 - Published: 9/5/2010 - Sherlock H., DI Lestrade
It Takes A Village by CaffieneKitty reviews
Sherlock Holmes is ill and the world does not come to an end. Film at 11. GEN.
Sherlock - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,805 - Reviews: 96 - Favs: 524 - Follows: 53 - Published: 9/6/2010 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete
A Brief Account Of Life With Zombies by Silver Pard reviews
Sherlock thinks it's all a bit of a nuisance, John is having the time of his life, and Mycroft is Not Impressed. With anything, but mostly his minions' inability to provide a good cup of tea.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,384 - Reviews: 375 - Favs: 2,425 - Follows: 266 - Published: 8/19/2010 - Complete
Punchclock by Malteaser reviews
Hatter is a working man.
Alice, 2009 - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,477 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 4/12/2010 - Published: 4/5/2010 - Hatter
The First Time by ProfessorSpork reviews
Five times the Doctor doesn't sleep with Rose Tyler--and one time he does. Spoilers through Journey's End. Rose/9, Rose/10, Rose/10.5
Doctor Who - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,278 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 70 - Follows: 2 - Published: 3/14/2010 - 10th Doctor, Rose T. - Complete
Dragons by Who Shot AR reviews
The two eldest of George Laurence's boys hear their Papa talking one night of dragons. Set during Victory of Eagles, when Laurence, et al., set down at Wollaton Hall for the night.
Temeraire - Rated: K - English - Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 885 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 8 - Published: 1/3/2010 - Complete
Simple Gifts by KCS reviews
Answer to a wish from the LiveJournal watsons woes community's holiday fic and art exchange. "I wish for: Sick!Watson. Mrs. Hudson is spending the holidays with her sister. Holmes decides to take care of Watson, himself." Oneshot, set Christmas 1881.
Sherlock Holmes - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,934 - Reviews: 41 - Favs: 116 - Follows: 4 - Published: 11/21/2009 - Dr. Watson, Sherlock Holmes - Complete
Well, You Know by Roach Patrol reviews
Season 1 AU. July in New New York, 099: the dawning of the latest and greatest era of beauty, freedom, truth and love. And when it comes to Rose Tyler and Jack Harkness, a lot of beauty. And when it comes to their friend John, a lot of love.
Doctor Who - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,203 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 37 - Follows: 8 - Published: 10/11/2009 - Jack H., Rose T. - Complete
This is Forever by arethusa85 reviews
Left behind on the deserted beach, Rose and the new Doctor adjust to each other and the possibilities of the future. Having one heart, one life, turns out to be what makes all the difference. Post Series Four, Rose/Human!Doctor pairing.
Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 13 - Words: 20,311 - Reviews: 71 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 69 - Updated: 5/6/2009 - Published: 9/11/2008
All That You Have Is Your Soul by Zweee reviews
10/Rose Rose gets lost. After living a nightmare for over a year the Doctor finds her again. But sometimes the healing can be worse than the trauma. As Rose tries to put her life back together the Doctor deals with the guilt of not finding her sooner.
Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 8 - Words: 19,114 - Reviews: 95 - Favs: 61 - Follows: 97 - Updated: 3/31/2008 - Published: 3/3/2008
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Uncharted reviews
The bomb explodes as Sherlock's bullet hits it, blowing John and Sherlock into an adventure of Vikings, dragons and eel sushi. Who else will end up in this nightmare?
Crossover - How to Train Your Dragon & Sherlock - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 11 - Words: 9,042 - Reviews: 90 - Favs: 88 - Follows: 143 - Updated: 7/18/2014 - Published: 12/31/2011
Quiet and Alone reviews
I am the son of Steve Carlsberg. My bloodstone chants are quiet and lonely, and I fell in love with a beautiful, perfect girl.
Radio Dramas - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Supernatural - Chapters: 2 - Words: 853 - Reviews: 1 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 8/6/2013 - Published: 8/5/2013
Inconstant Monochrome reviews
Ciel is tired of life. Sebastian helps. Art trade
Kuroshitsuji - Rated: K - English - Friendship/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 451 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/15/2012 - Ciel P., Sebastian M.
Against the Odds reviews
John Watson is a man who defeats all odds. Short drabble that's actually in one of my original works I'm currently toiling over. 150 words exactly.
Sherlock - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 151 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 4 - Published: 1/30/2012 - John W., Sherlock H.
The Lost Art Of Deduction reviews
Mycroft was perfectly happy in the library reading his precious books. And he thought that Mummy and Papa were happy with him. So why was Sherlock born? What is the point of Sherlock? Kidfic, in Mycroft's perspective. Rated K for now.
Sherlock - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Friendship - Chapters: 5 - Words: 2,706 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 12/19/2011 - Published: 10/27/2011 - Mycroft H., Sherlock H.
A Bad Day reviews
Moriarty has infiltrated the British government. Mycroft is having some chronic bad days. Not bad enough to call Sherlock for help, obviously... Until something horrible happens... Will be rated K unless something bad needs to happen.
Sherlock - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 2,512 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 11/26/2011 - Published: 9/26/2011 - Mycroft H., J. Moriarty
The Brighter Side reviews
Sequel to Finding Hope. Rose and the Doctor deal with the aftermath of Jimmy's attack. Rated T for possible language and definite thematic elements. Please enjoy!
Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 7 - Words: 4,927 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 10/16/2011 - Published: 10/3/2011 - 10th Doctor, Rose T.
Tomato Garden reviews
Spamano oneshot fluff! Fem!Romano. Other countries might be persent too, plans include France and UK. Rated for Romano's mouth. All fluff, some minor angst planned as well. Please enjoy!
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 4,244 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 9/28/2011 - Published: 9/20/2011 - Spain, S. Italy/Romano
Finding Hope reviews
Rose's past comes back to haunt her, right when she thought she'd forgotten. When Jimmy Stone comes back to claim his promise of forever, will the Doctor be able to save her? Rated for language, suggestive themes and rape. Don't like, don't read.
Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 13,855 - Reviews: 96 - Favs: 90 - Follows: 50 - Updated: 9/27/2011 - Published: 9/6/2011 - 10th Doctor, Rose T. - Complete
Collision reviews
Doctor Who/Sherlock/Axis Powers Hetalia crossover fic. What will happen when 3 universes collide? Will the Doctor be able to fix it? And if the Pict suddenly show up? What about France and Jack? Rated T for Romano's language.
Crossover - Doctor Who & Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 7,937 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 9/24/2011 - Published: 8/25/2011 - 10th Doctor
Forever Couldn't Happen reviews
The Doctor's thoughts after Doomsday. Fairly short oneshot.
Doctor Who - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 428 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 5 - Published: 8/20/2011 - 10th Doctor, Rose T. - Complete