Author has written 1 story for Percy Jackson and the Olympians, and Vampire Academy.
Hi, I'm Kendall.
I am 8 years old.
My sister, Skylar, or ToriOzera, types and edits my stories, I tell her what to type.
My favorite colors are yellow and red.
My favorite number is 6.
My nickname is Shmee, don't ask.
That was some useless info.
Things I Am Not Allowed To Do At Hogwarts:
1) The Giant Squid is not an appropriate date to the Yule Ball.
2) I am not allowed to sing, "We're Off to See the Wizard" while skipping off to the Headmaster's office.
3) I am not allowed to take out a life insurance policy on Harry Potter.
4) I am not allowed to ask Dumbledore to show me the pointy hat trick.
5) I am not allowed to give Remus Lupin a flea collar.
6) I am not allowed to bring a Magic 8 Ball to Divination.
7) I am not allowed to say that Seamus Finnegan is "after me lucky charms."
8) I am not allowed to start a betting pool on this years Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. It's taste-less, tacky, and not a good money-making strategy.
9) I am not allowed to joke about Remus' "time of the month."
10) I am not allowed to make light saber sounds with my wand.
12) I am not to refer to the Accio charm as "The Force."
13) I am not allowed to claim that growing marijuana or hallucinogenic mushrooms is "Extra Herbology Work."
14) I will not use my socks to make hand-puppets of the Slytherin-House mascot.
15) If the thought of a spell makes me giggle for more than 15 seconds, assume that I am not allowed to use it.
16) I will not lock the Slytherins and Gryffindors in a room together and bet on which House will come out alive.
17) I will not charm the suits of armor to do a rendition of "The Knights of the Round Table" for the Christmas Feast.
18) I am not allowed to declare an official "Hug A Slytherin Day."
19) I am not allowed to sing my own personal spy music while wandering the hallways.
20) It is not necessary to yell, "BURN!" Whenever Snape takes points away from Gryffindor.
21) I will not say the phrase, "Get a Life" to Voldemort.
22) First years are not to be fed to Fluffy.
23) I will never ask Harry if his Voldie senses are tingling.
24) I will stop referring to showering as "Giving Moaning-Myrtle an eye-full."
25) I will not make, "OMGWTF" a spell.
26) It is not necessary to yell, "BAM" every time I Apparate.
27) I will not steal Gryffindor's sword from Dumbledore's office and use it to patrol the hallways.
28) I will not poke Hufflepuffs with spoons, nor shall I insist that their color's indicate that they're "covered in bees."
29) "I've heard every joke possible about Oliver Wood's name" is not a challenge.
30) I will not go to class skyclad.
31) I will not use Umbridge's quill to write, "Told you I was Hard Core."
32) If a class-mate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of that and draw a Dark Mark on their arm.
33) House Elves are not acceptable replacements for Bludgers.
34) I will not start every potion's class by asking Snape if the potion is acceptable as Body Lotion.
35) I will not call the Weasly twins, "bookends."
36) I will not call the Patil twins, "bookends."
37) I will not call the Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher Kenny, even if he is wearing an orange anorak.
38) There is no such thing as a were-thylacine.
39) I will not give Luna Lovegood Coast-To-Coast AM transcripts.
40) Tricking a school House Elf to strip of it's clothing does not make it mine. Yes, even when I yell out "PWND!"
41) I do not weigh the same as a Duck.
42) I do not have a Dalek Patronus.
43) I will not lick Trevor.
44) Gryffindor Courage does not come in bottles labeled, "Firewhiskey."
45) I will not dress up as Voldemort on Halloween.
46) It is a bad idea to tell Snape he takes himself too seriously.
47) I will not tell Sir Cadogan that The Knight's Who Say Ni have challenged him to a duel, then have all the students say, 'Ni' from various directions.
48) I am not the King of the Potato People and I do not have a flying carpet.
49) "To conquer the Earth with an army of flying monkeys" is not a career choice.
50) I will not tell the first years that Professor Snape is the Voice of God.
51) I will not start singing and dancing in the middle of a class and blame that someone put the Imperious Curse on me.
52) Asking, "How do you keep a Gryffindor in suspense?" and then walking away is only funny the first time.
53) The four houses are not the Morons, the Barons, the Smartelics, and the Junior Death Eaters
54) I will not tell Draco and Hermione to "Get a room" whenever they start to fight.
55) I will not dress up in a dementor suit and use a dustbuster on Harry's lips to get him to do whatever I want.
56) I will not wear my DEATH EATER AND PROUD OF IT shirt to school.
57) I will not call Professor McGonagall "McGoogles"
58) I will not jump up, yelling "VOLDEMORT, RUN!" in the middle of a Order of the Phoenix or DA meeting.
59) I will not tell Snape he needs to go to his "Happy place".
48) I will not greet Professor McGonagall with "What's new, pussy cat?"
60) I will not dress up as Voldemort for Halloween.
61) Telling Slytherin first years that to enter their common room they must point their wands strait up and say, "Morsmordre" is just plain mean.
62) I will not under any circumstances ask Harry Potter who died and made him boss.
63) I will not enchant a scarecrow and suit of armor to skip through the halls singing, We're Off to See the Wizard.
64) However tempting it may be, I will not send Voldemort a Christmas card telling him how much we all love him, even through these difficult times.
65) A wand is for magic only, it is not for picking noses, playing snooker, or playing drums no matter how bored I become.
66) I will not use Slytherine and Gryffindor first years as Christmas decorations.
67) I must not point at Voldemort and say "I taught him everything he knows".
The world is full of crazy people. They made me their leader.
It’s you and me against the world. We attack at dawn.
I run with scissors….it makes me feel dangerous.
Come to the Dark Side. We have cookies.
15 Things to do when your in Walmart!
1. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
2. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
3. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone,
4. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
5. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
6. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
7. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask,
8. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
9. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.
10. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
11. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look"
12. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through,
13. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream..
14. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!
15.Grap alot of bouncy balls and throw them down the aisle, shouting "Go, Pikachu, Go"
...Things to do in an elevator...
Stupid shiny Volvo owner.
I have a serious question for you. Fudge.
You know what I hate? How everyone thinks 'Oh bullying is so bad. I don't bully.' But you really do. The littlest things you don't realize you are doing is bullying. Like spreading a rumor you heard, even that is bullying.
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