I solemnly swear that if I get any flames, I will point and laugh at the idiocy of it all... okay, not so solemnly then.
Name: That's for me to know and you to agonize over, but you can call me Yuki. Why? 'Cus I like it.
Age: ...Not telling.
Thirteen Times Three Days 'Til The Night of the Dead
Hi to anyone insane enough to actually read this, welcome to the Dark Side.
Yes, if you're reading this, you have passed the test to whether or not you've cracked yet- and passed with flying colors (thus joining the Dark Side, we really need more members)!
Well, perhaps not flying colors... flying skulls, maybe?
Anyway, I would show you around the headquarters, but, I don't really want to go there again; good luck finding out the hard way where to dwell and where to scream...
The Day After Smoky, Colorful Skies
Yo. I am currently overcoming boredom...
Hey, I never said it was going to work, did I?
If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile. (Sirius- he's awesome-ly, who doesn't?)
If you are an expert at doing absolutely nothing (useful) for hours on end, paste this into your profile.
If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile.
If someone has ever said something to you that had nothing to do with your current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever felt like something was watching you and then turned around to find nothing, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.
If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile. (The irony...)
If people tend to misunderstand you copy this to your profile.
If you hate those irritating mosquitoes giving you mosquito bites copy this in your profile.
If, for no warning, you have laughed during a movie part that wasn't funny, put this in your profile.
Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. Copy this into your profile if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "Where to begin?"
1F Y0U C4N UND3R574ND 7H15 M355463 C0PY 17 4ND P4573 17 1N70 Y0UR PR0F1L3.
If you don't do drugs and never will, copy and paste this into your profile.
Sicence prvoes taht eevn wehn the wrods are srcabmled up you can sitl raed tihs. Cpoy and Psate tihs otno yuor porflie if you can raed tihs.
If you believe every child deserves a chance to grow up and go to school, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you want world peace, a brighter future, and more chocolate, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever pushed on a door that says pull (or vice versa) copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever wanted to slap someone, but restrained yourself, congratulations, and copy and paste this to your profile.
If you secretly hoped to get a letter from Hogwarts when you were 11, copy and paste this to your profile. (I am a wizard- Mwahahahahahaha!)
Quotes I Like From My Favorite Authors, From Me, or Anywhere Really..
A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station..
You laugh because I'm different. I laugh because you're all the same.
I didn't say it was your fault. I said I was going to blame you.
I like you. When I rule the world your death will be quick and painless.
Only crazy people understand the brilliance of crazy things.
Yes, I hit like a girl. You could too if you hit a bit harder.
Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd.
I'm not clumsy! The floor just hates me.
An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed.
Don't worry about the world coming to an end today; its already tomorrow in Australia.
If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
Life isn't passing me by, it’s trying to run me over.
To the world, you are just one person, but to one person, you are the world.
We are not retreating . . . we are advancing in another direction.
They say love hides behind every corner. I must be walking in circles.
I've always wanted to drown my troubles, but I can't get my enemy to go swimming.
I'm sure someone cares that you're alive. It's just not me!
I live in my own little world- but it's OK, they know me there.
If you can't convince them, confuse them.
You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder.
A criminal will stab you in the front. A friend will stab you in the back. A boyfriend will stab you in the heart. But only best friends poke each other with straws.
When life gives you lemons, chuck them at the people you hate.
I am nobody. Nobody is perfect. Therefore, I am perfect!
I did what they say and chose the road less traveled...Now where the heck am I?
Someday, my prince will come. He just took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions.
Don’t knock on death’s door. Ring the bell and run.
Don't ever frown, you never know who's falling in love with your smile.
I've gone to find myself. If I get back before I return, tell me to wait here.
The buddy system is essential to survival; it gives the enemy something else to shoot at.
You're not yourself today. I noticed the improvement immediately.
An expert is a person who tells you a simple thing in a confusing way in such a fashion that you think the confusion is your fault.
What I if told you
you read the above line wrong?
There are 2 indefinite things in the world. The universe and human stupidy, and I'm not so sure about the universe.
Just because I can't do something doesn't change the fact that you suck at doing that something.
There are all sorts of friends - the good kind, the bad kind, the kind that you see every day on the streets… But the terrible kind that punch you when you stray, drag you forward on your butt when you can’t walk on your own anymore, and ignore you even when you yell yourself hoarse telling them to get lost - the kind you don’t always get to meet in life… treasure them.
Every single one of us has the potential to be a monster. We just need a hard enough push
I used to think I was indecisive. Now I'm not sure.
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.
An eye for an eye leaves the whole world blind.
Truth, justice, honor...none of that's worth anything.What matters is people, and people aren't honest or just or honorable. They're petty and they're angry and they're afraid, and all anyone really wants, deep down, is to be wanted. And what's truth to that?
I say there are spots that don't come off... Spots that never come off, d'you know what I mean?
Opportunity didn't knock on my door, it slammed it down and demanded that I get the hell out of my house and do something.
The other day, someone asked me how I kept my sanity in a world like this. My answer? I didn't.
It is not weird to argue with yourself, it is only weird to argue with yourself and lose.
I don't care if it's half full or half empty, I just want to know who drank my soda.
I'll try and try and keep on trying, but that's all I can and will ever do.
Every author has their eccentricities, mine is putting characters in horrible situations to break them down and then building a story around the aftermath. Some people would call it satisfying a sadistic nature, I call it creating a story difficult to forget.
Live everyday like its your last, because one day it will be.
Don't start what you can't finish; you'll live longer.
Isn't that a question everyone asks themselves at one point? Why are you here? I asked that question sooner than most, and I'm here because I think this path will lead me to an answer.
Don't play stupid with me, I'm better at it!
What if we're all just the figments of someone's imagination?" "...Then I fear for the sanity of that person.
I'm not cynical; everything just sucks.
Everyone has a photographic memory; most just don't have film.
Comfort the disturbed. Disturb the comfortable.
I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather...not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
Parents call it talking back, we call it explaining why they're wrong.
No offense... But... Your crazy insane!" "Why would I take offense?...I've seen your sanity and frankly, it bores me.
I slept for far too long and when I woke, the world was upside down... And I was destined for hell, because I simply chose to disbelieve in heaven. Perhaps I was just still asleep, somewhere out there, many years ago? I enter a dream from which there was no waking.
You have to accept the past to change the future.
Monsters aren't born, they're made.
Memory isn't like reading a book; it's more like writing a book from fragmentary notes.
My Random Things
-Read the following words out loud without mistakes, a average person can't. Take your time.
This is this cat
This is is cat
This is how cat
This is to cat
This is keep cat
This is an cat
This is idiot cat
This is busy cat
This is for cat
This is forty cat
This is seconds cat
Now read the third word of each line. :D
1. My mother taught me to appreciate a job well done. "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."
2. My mother taught me religion. "You better pray that will come out of the carpet."
3 . My mother taught me about time travel. "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"
4. My mother taught me logic. "Because I said so, that's why."
5. My mother taught me more logic. "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."
6. My mother taught me foresight. "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."
7. My mother taught t me irony. "Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."
8. My mother taught me about the science of osmosis. "Shut your mouth and eat your supper."
9. My mother taught me about contortion. "Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"
10. My mother taught me about stamina. "You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."
11. My mother taught me about weather. "This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."
12. My mother taught me about hypocrisy. "If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"
14. My mother taught me about the circle of life. "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."
15. My mother taught me about behavior modification. "Stop acting like your father!"
16. My mother taught me about envy. "There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."
17. My mother taught me about anticipation. "Just wait until we get home."
18. My mother taught me aboutreceiving. "You are going to get it when you get home!"
19. My mother taught me medical science. "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."
20. My mother taught me ESP. "Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you're cold?"
21. My mother taught me humor. "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don 't come running to me."
22. My mother taught me how to become an adult. "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."
23. My mother taught me genetics. "You're just like your father."
24. My mother taught me about my roots. "Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"
25. My mother taught me wisdom. "When you get to be my age, you'll understand."
26. My mother taught me about justice. "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"
Hey, did anyone notice the lack of number 13?
To all those who think Homophobia is wrong and want to fight for a better future for our gay and lesbian friends, please repost this into your profile:
I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.
If you ignore this without reading it you have no heart... But if you find you can't stop until you reach the end you must have a very big heart.
In memory of the Columbian students that were lost
"What comes before L in the alphabet?"
Regular people: "K. Why? Whatever- what did you do yesterday?"
Me: "Um... A B C D E F G... G... uh... Forget it- can we just continue our conversation about dominating the world?"
OBITUARY FOR THE LATE MR. COMMON SENSE
Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense,who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.
He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: Knowing when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair; and Maybe it was my fault.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6 year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.
Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get Parental consent to administer Calpol, sun lotion, or a band-aid to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.
Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.
Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.
Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.
Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.
He is survived by his 3 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.
By moving one of the following digits, make the equation correct. 62 – 63 = 1
What is special about the following sequence of numbers? 8 5 4 9 1 7 6 10 3 2 0
Three travelers register at a hotel and are told that their rooms will cost $10 each so they pay thirty. Later the clerk realizes that he made a mistake and should have only charges them $25. He gives a bellboy $5 to return to them but the bellboy is dishonest and gives each only one, keeping $2 for himself. So the men actually spend $27 and the bellboy kept $2. What happened to the other dollar of the original $30?
You have a fox, a chicken, and a sack of grain. You must cross a river with only one of them at a time. If you leave the fox with the chicken he will eat it; if you leave the chicken with the grain he will eat it. How can you get all three of them across safely?
You are a bus driver. At your first stop, you pick up 29 people. On your second stop, 18 of those 29 people get off, and at the same time 10 new passengers arrive. At your next stop 3 of those 10 passengers get off, and 13 new passengers come on. On your fourth stop 2 of the remaining 10 passengers get off as well as 6 of the 13 passengers and then 17 new passengers get on. What is the color of the bus driver’s eyes?
A rooster lays an egg at the very top of a slanted roof. Which side is the egg going to roll off on?
You see a boat that is full of people. Then, on closer examination, you see that there is not a single person on the boat. How is that possible?
2 boxers are fighting. On the 6th round, one of them gets knocked out. However, no men in the arena threw a punch. How did the boxer get knocked out?
There is a plane full of Australian citizens. Unfortunately, the plane crashes right on the border of the United States and Mexico. Where are the survivors buried and why?
There is a hole 2 feet in height, 3 feet in length, and 8 feet in width. How much dirt is in the hole?
You go scuba diving and you see a sunken ship. Going inside, you find 2 skeletons with an L carved on their foreheads, a poker table, 3 chairs, 3 decks of cards, and a ripped piece of a life jacket on the anchor. What happened there?
There were 3 prisoners sentenced to a year in prison and a warden. The warden, a cruel woman with a love for games, told the prisoners that she would ask them a question. If they got it right, they could go home, if they got it wrong, 10 years would be added on to their sentence, and if they didn't answer, then nothing would happen to them. The prisoners agreed that they did not want to guess for fear of an added ten years and the warden lined them up in a single file line. She told them that she had 5 hats, 2 black and 3 white. They all had a hat on and the question was which hat they had on. Prisoner #3 could see prisoners #1 and 2, prisoner #2 could see prisoner #1 and poor guy prisoner #1 couldn't see anybody. They all could not see their own hats. Prisoner #3 said ‘I don’t know and I don’t want to guess.’ Prisoner #2 said the same thing and prisoner #1 said ‘I have a white hat’ and he was let go. How did prisoner #1 know he had a white hat?
There is a dead man lying on an island in the middle of nowhere with a rock next to him. He has an 'S' on his chest. Who is the man, how did he get there, and how did he die?
You are walking along a path. It splits into two and there are 2 guards there. One path leads to heaven and the other leads to hell. One guard always tells the truth and the other always lies. You don't know which is which or who is who. You can only ask them one question to figure out which way is heaven. What would you ask and why?
A murderer is condemned to death. He has to choose between three rooms The first is full of raging fires, the second is full of assassins with loaded guns, and the third is full of lions that haven't eaten in 3 years. Which room is safest for him?
Can you name three consecutive days without using the words Wednesday, Friday, or Sunday?
This is an unusual paragraph. I'm curious as to just how quickly you can find out what is so unusual about it. It looks so ordinary and plain that you would think nothing was wrong with it. In fact, nothing is wrong with it! It is highly unusual though. Study it and think about it, but you still may not find anything odd. But if you work at it a bit, you might find out. Try to do so without any coaching!
A boy was at a carnival and went to a booth where a man said to the boy, "If I write your exact weight on this piece of paper then you have to give me $50, but if I cannot, I will pay you $50." The boy looked around and saw no scale so he agrees, thinking no matter what the carny writes he'll just say he weighs more or less. In the end the boy ended up paying the man $50. How did the man win the bet?
A farmer challenges an engineer, a physicist, and a mathematician to fence off the largest amount of area using the least amount of fence. The engineer made his fence in a circle and said it was the most efficient. The physicist made a long line and said that the length was infinite. Then he said that fencing half of the Earth was the best. The mathematician laughed at the others and with his design, beat the others. What did he do?
Congratulations and thanks if you actually read through the entire thing and congratulations for not wasting your time if you just skipped to the end 'cus really, this was a waste of time.
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