I OWE MY MOTHER
1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE. "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."
2. My mother taught me RELIGION. "You better pray that will come out of the carpet."
3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL. "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"
4. My mother taught me LOGIC. " Because I said so, that's why."
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC. "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT. "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."
7. My mother taught me IRONY. "Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS. "Shut your mouth and eat your supper."
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM. "Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER. "This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY. "If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE. "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION. "Stop acting like your father!"
15. My mother taught me about ENVY. " There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."
16 My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION. "Just wait until we get home."
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING. "You are going to get it when you get home!"
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE. "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way."
19. My mother taught me ESP. "Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"
20. My mother taught me HUMOR. "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me. "
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT. "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."
22. My mother taught me GENETICS. "You're just like your father."
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS. "Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"
24. My mother taught me WISDOM. "When you get to be my age, you'll understand."
And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE. "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you".
FRIENDS: Will comfort you when he rejects you.
BEST FRIENDS: Will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"
FRIENDS: Will be there for you when he breaks up with you.
BEST FRIENDS: Will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..."
FRIENDS: Helps you up when you fall.
BEST FRIENDS: Keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, dumb ass?"
FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince.
BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you.
FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying.
BEST FRIENDS: Will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, Loser!"
FRIENDS: Will offer you a soda.
BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you.
FRIENDS: Will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month.
BEST FRIENDS: Will throw you a tampon and push you in.
FRIENDS: Gives you their umbrella in the rain.
BEST FRIENDS: Takes yours and says, "Run bitch run!"
FRIENDS: Will help you move.
BEST FRIENDS: Will help you move the bodies.
FRIENDS: Will bail you out of jail.
BEST FRIENDS: Would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"
FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.
BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.
FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.
BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!
FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.
BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you sayin "DAMN! We messed up!"
FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.
BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore.
FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.
BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.
FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.
BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."
FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.
BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...
FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you
FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."
FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.
BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.
FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college. (aka: drinking buddies)
BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.
FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough.
BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say "Girl, drink the rest of that! You know we don't waste!"
FRIENDS: Would read ignore this.
BEST FRIENDS: Will repost this crap!
95% of teens would be crying if Justin Beiber was on a 100 ft tall building about to jump. If you are some of the 5% who brought popcorn and friends, add this to your profie.
1. What’s your name?
Which one? I have many.
Take your pick, less than 20
4. What’s your birthstone?
Sapphire? Purely guessing.
6. Astrological sign?
Not taller than a giraffe by any means.
I think I'm fat (but I'm fine with that)
9. Hair color?
10. Eye color?
11. Are you in love?
12. With who?
MANY PEOPLE (I DO NOT WISH TO DIVULGE)
13. Are you lying to me?
14. Do you have an imaginary friend?
15. Do you want an imaginary friend?
I'd certainly like another, mine's lonely.
16. Look to your left. What do you see?
17. What were you doing at 6:45 this morning?
18. What was the last thing you yelled?
"NOOOOOOOO! IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD!"
19. Do you believe in magic?
20. Do you believe in fairies?
21. Who’s your crush?
I have too many to list.
22. Have you ever fallen down a flight of stairs?
23. More than once?
24. What did you do when you got to the bottom?
Cry and scream that I was going to die.
25. Type with your feet.
26. Was that fun?
27. Run around the house. How do you feel?
No, I'm to lazy
28. Do you own a credit card?
I wish I did
29. Do you like to shop?
30. What’s the last thing you bought?
Sweets and popcorn and a movie ticket
31. Do you have any children?
I don't think so...
32. Are you married?
No, wish I was though
33. Who’s your crush?
see 21, 11, 12
34. What’s your favorite color?
What colour is a rainbow?
35. Favorite animal?
36. Favorite fruit?
37. Quick! You have to save the world!
I'll do my best.
38. Someone has a knife to your back.
SCREAMS, BEGS AND PLEADS*
39. Do you swear?
Yeah, I is a badman!
40. Do your parents know you swear?
41. What do you have open on your computer?
FF, YouTube, Wiki
42. Who’s the last person you talked to and what did you say?
43. Where are you?
44. Look up. Now look back. What did you see?
45. What’s the last thing you ate?
Jammie Dodger *DW Theme Tune*
46. What's your personality like?
47. Who do you have a crush on and will never have a chance with?
48. What was the last thing you thought?
Casualty is getting really good!
49. Do you sleep walk?
50. Do you sleep talk?
I hope not
51. What’s the weirdest dream you've ever had?
52. Say “George Bush”. What's the first thing that comes to your mind?
Doctor Who. Oops that was Nixon.
53. You now have a million dollars. What do you do?
Check the conversion rate to pounds... Not as much as I thought...
54. What are you eating/drinking right now?
Nothing, unless saliva and skin cells count
55. What are you writing RIGHT NOW?
Take a guess...
56. Find a globe. Spin it. What does it say?
Can be bothered
57. Find a book. Turn to page 56, line 18, word 6. What does it say?
58. What can you hear right now?
An episode of Casualty
59. Have a conversation with the closest living thing to you other than yourself.
60. Turn on the T.V. What show is on?
61. What happened last time you were typing here on this computer?
I was on YT watching videos.
62. Stand up. Close your eyes. Spin around three times. Stop. Open your eyes. What’s the first thing you see?
63. Two more questions… who’s your crush?
64. Find the third letter of all your answers. Underline them. What do they spell?
The first character you fell in love with: Nikki
The character you never expected to love: Zoe
The character you don’t like that everyone else does: Louise
The character you’re most like: Jessica
The character you’d slap: Ash
Three favourite characters: Sam, Nikki and Roxy