derpette-Waffle
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Joined 10-12-11, id: 3335361, Profile Updated: 07-15-13
Author has written 43 stories for Glee, Web Shows, and Hobbit.

http://litsy-kalyptica.tumblr.com

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Beneath The Mask You Wear by ColferPervertSoldier reviews
The Phillips twins have a strange dynamic. Kurt's the favored, golden child (at least, in the eyes of their parents). Carson... not so much. They're still very close, though. No matter what, they know they'd do anything for each other. So what happens when the heart starts to want what it shouldn't? A Glee/SBL crossover loosely based on the TV show "Skins." Kurt/Carson pairing
Crossover - Glee & Struck by Lightning, 2012 - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 32 - Words: 321,713 - Reviews: 157 - Favs: 60 - Follows: 105 - Updated: 3/3 - Published: 9/16/2013 - Kurt H., Santana L., Sebastian S.
Separation by Neocolai reviews
Thorin blames Fili and Kili for the missing Arkenstone, and he punishes them in only way he knows will succeed: isolation until the true thief owns up to his crime.
Hobbit - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,580 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 107 - Follows: 33 - Published: 12/21/2014 - Thorin, Bilbo B., Fili, Kili - Complete
A warrior's daughter, a warrior's wife and a warrior's mother by Lakritzwolf reviews
Be at peace, my beloved ones, for nothing can hurt you anymore. The pain is mine alone to bear.
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 672 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/25/2014 - Thorin, Kili, Fili, Dis - Complete
hearts so raw and clear by fandomlver reviews
An injury in Men's territory leaves Kili vulnerable to their medical practices. Kink meme fill.
Hobbit - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,653 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 4 - Published: 4/27/2014 - Kili, Fili - Complete
But All Shall Fail in Sadness by TolkienGirl reviews
"And Kili falls, and Fili shouts out a curse that is half a prayer because, by all the good left in the lonely world, it cannot end this way." Battle of the Five Armies. You know what follows. No slash, OF COURSE-just tragic Durin family feels. Nothing belongs to me but my feels and devotion. Rating for death and some violence/bloodiness.
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Family/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,383 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 48 - Follows: 4 - Published: 12/20/2013 - Fili, Kili - Complete
Friends with Benefits by mrs.cookieeater reviews
Phil wakes up tied to the bed, which isn't that unusual for him, since him and Dan are friends with benefits. Smutty, kinky sex ensues! PLEASE DO NOT READ IF YOU DO NOT LIKE GAY SMUT! ALSO, I DO NOT CLAIM TO OWN ANYTHING IN THIS STORY! IT IS ALL PURE FANFICTION!
Web Shows - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,157 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 6 - Published: 9/14/2013 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire - Complete
Unbreakable Bonds by ColferPervertSoldier reviews
Kurt and Carson Hummel were as close as twins could possibly be. Practically inseperable since birth. Meant to be together, you could say. Too bad life and love isn't as easy as we'd like it to be. THIS STORY INVOLVES TWINCEST AND MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH. Co-written with the awesome Carol :D
Crossover - Glee & Struck by Lightning, 2012 - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 42 - Words: 477,478 - Reviews: 655 - Favs: 244 - Follows: 313 - Updated: 8/28/2013 - Published: 11/22/2012 - Kurt H. - Complete
A Final Goodbye by justalotoffeelings reviews
Fili braid's his little brother's hair for the last time.
Hobbit - Rated: K+ - English - Tragedy/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,863 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 81 - Follows: 10 - Published: 7/10/2013 - Fili, Kili - Complete
Race Against Time by Italian Hobbit reviews
Kili has decided that Fili needs to learn archery, but a mishap puts Kili's life in grave danger. No slash.
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Angst/Family - Chapters: 23 - Words: 59,418 - Reviews: 733 - Favs: 555 - Follows: 351 - Updated: 4/16/2013 - Published: 1/19/2013 - Thorin, Fili, Kili, Dis - Complete
What Price Victory by justalotoffeelings reviews
Their tombstones said that they died defending their uncle, but the legend remembers that they died protecting each other. I made myself sad. Have a Battle of Five Armies fic.
Hobbit - Rated: K+ - English - Tragedy/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,240 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 65 - Follows: 7 - Published: 4/3/2013 - Fili, Kili - Complete
Inferno by Laora reviews
[Modern AU.] -— Five-year-old Kíli is screaming for his mother, for his uncle and his brother, but Bilbo doesn't understand why. After all, the school is only having a fire drill...
Hobbit - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,680 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 170 - Follows: 25 - Published: 2/17/2013 - Bilbo B., Kili - Complete
When a Heart Breaks by thedayyoufindoutwhy reviews
"Someone at sometime said that everything happens for a reason. I'm not saying they're wrong. I'm just saying I hate the reasons." Phil gets into an accident and Dan is there to pick up the pieces. Danisnotonfire x AmazingPhil.
Web Shows - Rated: T - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 4 - Words: 5,956 - Reviews: 43 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 1/4/2013 - Published: 12/27/2012 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

As Long As You're Mine reviews
modern!AU - They were falling in love with the one person they shouldn't, knowing it could only end badly -and somehow they didn't care. (Tauriel is Kili's new private nurse.)
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 14 - Words: 27,864 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 3/25 - Published: 2/21 - [Kili, Tauriel] Fili, Dis
Battle Wounds reviews
There was a time when the nightmares were only nightmares and the danger was not real –and that would adequately comfort his nephews so they might fall back asleep. But the horrific dreams were no longer just frightful images conjured in sleep, and there was no assurance that could make the danger fade into the quiet night.
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 979 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 4 - Published: 3/22 - Thorin, Fili, Kili - Complete
All That Glitters reviews
Thorin decides to remain with his husband in the Shire; in his stead, Fíli is to be crowned King of Erebor. His uncle urges him, in the lead up to the coronation, to find a wife with whom to produce an heir, or the royal line may be in jeopardy!
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 6 - Words: 7,662 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 3/20 - Published: 3/16 - [Fili, Sigrid] [Kili, Tauriel]
Spent reviews
The Erebor Complex Building consists of tiny tenements for struggling immigrants. Working an immersive study, Prof. Bilbo Baggins moves in down the hall from a family he quickly grows too close to.
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,858 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 4 - Published: 3/18 - Thorin, Bilbo B., Fili, Kili
A Thousand Years reviews
She reminded herself again, "This is the first of the happiest days of my life," and yet could still not make herself believe it.
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,671 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 4 - Published: 3/14 - [Tauriel, Kili] - Complete
Happy Meals reviews
(modern AU) It's Valentine's Day and Thorin has special plans for a date night with Bilbo, but they have to also involve leaving little Frodo with his nephews.
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 9,399 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 2/21 - Published: 2/8 - [Bilbo B., Thorin] Fili, Kili
Lights reviews
AU - Dan and friends break into a house and find a mutilated young man chained in the basement. His friends bolt, but Dan can't bring himself to leave without calling the police. To avoid a trespassing charge, Dan stays with him at the hospital for comfort. - (warnings for abuse and abduction)
Web Shows - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,360 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 12/22/2014 - Published: 12/18/2014 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire
Little Ladder House reviews
It's a completely normal relationship between two young men. Completely normal even though one is just 5 and a half inches tall.
Web Shows - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,813 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 12/6/2014 - Published: 6/13/2014 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire
Crystalline reviews
Phil needs a sugar daddy, and he needs one quick!
Web Shows - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,260 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 11/29/2014 - Published: 11/28/2014 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire
Uthethia reviews
Sequel to 'Midnight Sun' - Dan and Phil go to visit Phil's sister in her new palace home, and find they are not very welcome there.
Web Shows - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,833 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 11/5/2014 - Published: 11/2/2014 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire
Midnight Sun reviews
"Rule number one of a con: never get close to your pansy." — Dan lies his way into being appointed a palace physician, and the first order of business is to cure the Prince of his blindness. ((Sequel in the works, link in epilogue))
Web Shows - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 6 - Words: 8,008 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 11/2/2014 - Published: 10/29/2014 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire - Complete
Breathe reviews
fem!Phan, inspired by TFIOS - "I'm kinda new here, and wasn't really feeling up to dodgeball on my first day, so I figured I'd keep walking." She stared down at the ground, clearly avoiding eye contact with me or just feeling awkward looking at the tubes on my face. "I was wondering if you wanted some company."
Web Shows - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,454 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 4 - Published: 9/25/2014 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire
Chasm reviews
Dan is known as the town's "bad boy". He had piercings, he rides a motorcycle, and he even has a few tattoos. Phil is the town's "goodie two shoes".
Web Shows - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 25 - Words: 30,302 - Reviews: 59 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 39 - Updated: 9/24/2014 - Published: 5/22/2014 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire - Complete
Cerulean reviews
"All my life I've been looking for someone on my level of awkward." [fem!Phan]
Web Shows - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 489 - Reviews: 1 - Follows: 2 - Published: 5/31/2014 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire
Yours & Mine reviews
Dan is the new kid and makes a friend on the first day. They've both got secrets to hide.
Web Shows - Rated: T - English - Drama/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,232 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 2 - Published: 5/19/2014 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire - Complete
After Dark reviews
Dan is kicked out of his home and has nowhere to go. He ends up caught in the harsh life of a homeless teen in the big city. Phil knows the streets like the back of his hand and knows all the means of living there. He takes innocent Dan under his wing and tries to keep him away from dangers that come with this sordid life.
Web Shows - Rated: M - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 14 - Words: 20,290 - Reviews: 46 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 5/13/2014 - Published: 4/28/2014 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire - Complete
Safe & Sound reviews
Phil lives in a boarding school for the disturbed and Dan is a rich socialite living a dream. The only thing they have in common is Youtube. When Dan's family takes Phil in for a school year for publicity, they discover they have more in common than what they think.
Web Shows - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 18 - Words: 26,422 - Reviews: 72 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 28 - Updated: 4/27/2014 - Published: 3/25/2014 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire - Complete
Wings reviews
Dan is a fairy in training, living on Earth while he attends the Underground Academy. There, he and his friends (and best friend) train to become able fairies and dream of soon entering their home world of Celcyon. But things soon start to head downhill, and things quickly go from bad to worse -both for Celcyon, and for our own planet.
Web Shows - Rated: T - English - Romance/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 888 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 3 - Published: 3/17/2014 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire, Kickthepj, Crabstickz
Squeak reviews
Dan had long ago accepted that he was never going to fit in, but a new friend might show him he doesn't have to be normal to be happy.
Web Shows - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 17 - Words: 21,886 - Reviews: 48 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 3/5/2014 - Published: 2/5/2014 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire - Complete
Baby Ours reviews
The closeted couple found a baby girl in an alley, and a few hours later they were taking her home.
Web Shows - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 9,581 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 2/5/2014 - Published: 1/27/2014 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire - Complete
Poison reviews
Old habits die hard. - ((tw: self-harm and suicidal thoughts))
Web Shows - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 5 - Words: 4,821 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 1/24/2014 - Published: 1/23/2014 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire - Complete
The Secret Life of Phan reviews
So they've admitted they love each other... then what? - ((Sequel to Fanboy but can be read alone.))
Web Shows - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,313 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 1/23/2014 - Published: 1/22/2014 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire
Fanboy reviews
He wasn't special. He was just Dan, and just Dan wasn't good enough for amazing Phil. - Dan's POV
Web Shows - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 8 - Words: 8,200 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 1/21/2014 - Published: 1/14/2014 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire - Complete
Buddy System reviews
Five-year-old Dan has a hero named Phil; he's too young to know that heroes aren't always as strong as they seem.
Web Shows - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship/Drama - Chapters: 12 - Words: 16,217 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 1/20/2014 - Published: 1/14/2014 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire - Complete
London Angel - Closure reviews
It is Dan's time yet.
Web Shows - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,468 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/14/2014 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire - Complete
Static reviews
I should've died in that crash, but then who would take care of my boyfriend? - (changing POV)
Web Shows - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 4 - Words: 3,608 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 2 - Published: 1/14/2014 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire
Stitches reviews
I'm used to bearing twice the burden, and an expert at pretend. - Phil's POV
Web Shows - Rated: T - English - Angst/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 550 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 1/14/2014 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire - Complete
Fix You reviews
Six months of damage may take much longer to heal, but Dan isn't going anywhere.
Web Shows - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 14 - Words: 18,167 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 1/3/2014 - Published: 12/28/2013 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire - Complete
Christmas-a Bang Bang! reviews
Phan Christmassy drabbles!
Web Shows - Rated: K - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 309 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/6/2013 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire
London Angel reviews
Dan tries to make sure they make the most of whatever time they have.
Web Shows - Rated: T - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 5 - Words: 8,743 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 12/5/2013 - Published: 12/1/2013 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire - Complete
Merry Christmas, Darling reviews
Follow-Up to 'SPECIAL SNOWFLAKE' - Dan has every intention of proposing on Christmas, but has no idea how to go about it, and that's before the cold feet set in.
Web Shows - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,335 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 9 - Published: 11/29/2013 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire - Complete
Special Snowflake reviews
Phil goes out in the snow and Dan helps him warm up. (Unadulterated fluff) - Follow-Up, MERRY CHRISTMAS, DARLING, added!
Web Shows - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,643 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 8 - Published: 11/28/2013 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire - Complete
Be You reviews
Phan decides to be each other for Halloween, and whoever plays their boyfriend the best is the winner!
Web Shows - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,655 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 10 - Published: 10/19/2013 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire
Behind Closed Doors reviews
People see what they want to see. Everyone sees him as this great guy: immensely talented and compassionate, could never do any wrong; he's incredibly handsome and could so easily pass for straight if not for the "pretty little twink" on his arm; a wonderful person who could never hurt a fly. I know better, and had to learn the hard way. ((Special message after each chapter!))
Glee - Rated: T - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 12 - Words: 20,963 - Reviews: 43 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 36 - Updated: 8/31/2013 - Published: 7/6/2013 - Kurt H., Blaine A.
Midnight Train reviews
Kurt gets some tragic news, and he and Blaine and Rachel fly back to Lima for the funeral. ((In honor of Cory Monteith. - A chapter taken directly from another fic of mine, including A/N, sorry.))
Glee - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,539 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 4 - Published: 7/14/2013 - Kurt H., Finn H. - Complete
Au Revoir, Mon Amour reviews
I wish the very best for you, Kurt. And I pray that you never stop being you, because no one in this world can even compare.
Glee - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,058 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/23/2013 - Blaine A., Kurt H. - Complete
Where We All Went Wrong
Following the lives of the next generation. - divorced!Finchel, Puck/OC, Klaine, Fabrevans, separated!Brittana, Sugory.
Glee - Rated: T - English - Angst/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,094 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/9/2012
Statutory reviews
Kurt turned eighteen in September. Blaine turns 17 in October. That leaves a whole month where, legally, Blaine's bed is off limits. But no one told them that. - R&R 3, T for now, M later, KLAINE IS HERE!
Glee - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 6 - Words: 3,668 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 49 - Updated: 5/10/2012 - Published: 2/1/2012 - Kurt H., Blaine A.
Time of Your Life
Series of oneshots depicting the life of Klaine, spanning 67 years of endless love. M for smexy scenes in some chapters - Chapter 1: Kurt graduates, and will have to soon leave Blaine behind
Glee - Rated: M - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,649 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 5/1/2012 - Published: 4/20/2012 - Kurt H., Blaine A.
The Life and Times of a Dreamer reviews
1937- Blaine Anderson is a lonely music producer on his way to Hollywood, but the train breaks down in Middle of Nowhere, Iowa. He stays in a nearby town centered around a burlesque house, where he finds the most beautiful talent he'd ever met. - R&R!
Glee - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 6,643 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 2/29/2012 - Published: 2/2/2012 - Kurt H., Blaine A.
Detour
"Kurt felt tears building in his eyes as he read the list over half a dozen times, the prickling of salty drops stinging his corneas and he had to squeeze his eyelids shut to relieve the burning. This was it. He was gonna do it, once and for all." - R&R
Glee - Rated: T - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 450 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Published: 2/1/2012 - Kurt H., Blaine A.
There For You reviews
After finding out what had really happened to his father, Finn goes to mope in his room. Kurt, being the good stepbrother, goes to comfort him. Finn learns he's not alone, and a revelation is made. - Reviews are lovely :
Glee - Rated: T - English - Angst/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 890 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/1/2012 - Kurt H., Finn H. - Complete
Somewhere Only We Know reviews
After months of fighting off the inevitable, Kurt's back in the hospital, but this time he's as good as gone. Blaine is going to have to make the difficult decision of whether or not to let his husband of 21 years keep fighting. based on roleplay
Glee - Rated: T - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,371 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 6 - Published: 12/18/2011 - Blaine A., Kurt H.