Poll: I am writing a Slytherin!Harry eighth year fanfic and want to know who you think Harry should be with. If you want someone else, just pm me. No Ginny/Hermione/Ron/Cho, please! Vote Now!
Author has written 12 stories for Maximum Ride, Supernatural, Harry Potter, Percy Jackson and the Olympians, Mortal Instruments, and Twilight.
Name: DelusionalFun, but you may call me Raven or Ray, most of my friends do.
Age: I am in high school, but besides that I'm not telling
Sexuality: Pansexual, I refuse to choose my partners based on gender. To me love is all about love, not sexuality, and I refuse to allow discrimination to alter this.
Religious views: Atheistic/Agnostic (I'm on the fence. I have trouble believing there are deities out there that control over my life, but similarly, the idea that there is nothing after death is...confounding and almost horrifying)
I recently created a "Titans Won" AU roleplay for anyone who wants to join! The link is https://www.fanfiction.net/forum/The-Future-is-Dim-A-Percy-Jackson-Roleplay/151374/#
I am writing in a website for Pansexual teenagers, if you want to check it out!
TOP 10 FAVORITE BOOKS:
The Fault in Our Stars (Beautiful and tear-jerking while still being hilarious. John Green is an amazing author.)
Harry Potter (A fantastic world full of beings that can control magic. Amazing--plus, Harry/Blaise? Fucking hot.)
House of Night (Vampyres are awesome and this is a great spin on the mythos. I play for Team Stark, but Heath is adorable. And goddess, do I love Rephaim.)
Vampire Academy (A school full of vampires and dhampirs with elemental control, need I say more? Plus Christian is amazing)
Vladimir Todd (More vampires and beautiful characters. I love Snow, she is an outstanding female character)
Iron Fey (Who doesn't love faery? I ship Meghan/Ash)
Percy Jackson and the Olympians (Greek mythology, plus the first book for kids with a non-heterosexual main character. Nicercy is officially somewhat canon!)
The Kane Chronicles (Same but with Egyptian mythology and actually finished. Not to mention, well-written)
Artemis Fowl (Fairies that can kick some ass! Not to mention the brilliance that is Artemis and voracity within Holly)
Mortal Instruments (Sexy vampires, Nephilim, and Jace. Need I say more?)
Some shoutouts:mimzy and mj star (AKA Star-No she doesn't actually think she's a godess but yes she is insane!) ROSExKOGA (AKA Rose- One of the coolest girl I've ever met!) GuardianAthens (Or Athens--LOVE HER!!!! SHE'S AWESOME-totally my half-sister)
Now I know a lot of people don't like OCs but I love good ones and most of my stories shall have them. Check them out, cause hey, who knows? You might end up liking them!
Stereotypes That I Hate That I Take Personal Offense To
I'm a GYMNAST, therefore I MUST be a whore.
I'M SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a DANCER, So I MUST be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be gay. (But I'm a girl . . .)
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I HAVE GAY FRIENDS, so I must be GAY TOO.
I'm WHITE and have black friends, so I MUST think I'm black.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over-controlling and a bitch.
I read COMICS, so I MUST be a loser.
I am a FANGIRL, so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker. (Um . . . no comment.)
I'm INTELLIGENT, so I MUST be weak.
I am AMERICAN, so I MUST be an obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant. (look above.)
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I am QUIET and POLITE, so I MUST be a pushover. (Most of the time I'm quiet and polite. Piss me off and you'll see otherwise.)
I use GOOD GRAMMAR, so I MUST be a snob.
I prefer FANTASY and SCI-FI, so I MUST be out of touch with reality.
I love TO LEARN so I MUST be boring. (Talk to my friends and you'll realize I am anything but boring.)
I'm WHITE, so I MUST be a racist.
I am a GIRL, so boys MUST be better than me at sports. (I'm not gonna say anything because mesports=BAM! Our team's doomed.)
I am a GIRL, so I MUST only be good at work. (Ha! Oh, you make me laugh . . .)
I am WHITE and I like to DANCE, so I MUST be lame
I am SKINNY, so I MUST be sensitive about my weight. (I'm the exact oppisite. I think if i went on a diet I'd be considered anorexic.)
I am a CHRISTIAN/CATHOLIC/ANGLICAN/PROTESTANT, so I MUST go to church every Sunday. (Bah!)
I am a CHRISTIAN/CATHOLIC/ANGLICAN/PROTESTANT, so I MUST not do anything on Halloween. (De best Holi day on Pluto. And Earth for you earthlings.)
I am POOR, so I MUST not have good hygiene.
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser
I like READING, so I MUST be a Loner. (My friends annoy me to no end sometimes, but that's what makes them great.)
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish.
I like to READ, so I MUST do nothing except read. (I'm on here, aren't I?)
I'm a GIRL, so I MUST like to talk about crushes, dolls, not getting my clothes dirty, and parties.
I don't STUDY much but still get STRAIGHT A's, so I MUST be cheating.
I don't think VEGETARIANISM makes sense, so I MUST think all vegetarians are hippies. (My aunt was a hippy and she wasn't a vegetarian. Love ya, Aunt T.)
I'm easily ANNOYED, so I MUST be bratty.
I LISTEN TO ROCK MUSIC, so I MUST be a rebel.
I'm a GIRL, so I MUST love cute/fuzzy animals. (Rabid Bears are fuzzy. I don't like rabid bears.)
I grew up with a SMOKER/ALCOHOLIC/DRUG ADDICT, therefore I MUST be one myself. (Never touched a cigarrette in my life. The lighter, on the other hand . . . It's my calling.)
I wear GLASSES, so I MUST be a nerd who makes straight As.
I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cell phone or regular phone. I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with Twilight and Maximum Ride, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things. Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone: Iheartjake, TeamJacob101, Boysareadrag, The Dawn Is Breaking, twilite addict, The Lonely Teenager, AliceDaSpaz, Skittle.Rocke, Silent_Broken_Heart, St. Fang of Boredom, Deathtobieber, gracefuldarkangel
10 Commandments of a Teenager
1) Thou shall not sneak out when parents are sleeping.
Now for semoehtnig itnresitng...
i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty
If you could read that put it in your profile.
Girl: just so you know i am extremely mad at you
"Don't worry, I'm so over him. I honestly don't ca--"
I didnt fall for him...
When you find a real man...
Him: What time should i ask to be home?
Trying love a second time is like eating a hamburger, throwing it up, and then eating it again. (Hmmmmm . . . who tried that?)
Girl: your amazing
Boy: who do you like
Guys are horrible creatures
Love is like peeing your pants. Everyone can see it but only you can feel it's true warmth.
Ohh my, you clearly are oblivious to the fact that your eyes do so much damage.
I love him,
Love is a stalker, it just never leaves you alone.
I was sad when i found out that you were taken...
They say kissing is the language of love. Care to indulge in a little convo?
Men make the highs higher and the lows more frequent.
I didn't fall for you... You tripped me.
We have a communication problem and I don't wanna talk about it.
Its hard to pretend you love someone when you dont but its even harder to pretend you dont love someone when you really do
I just want one guy to come up and say to me "sorry my whole entire gender sucks" ( that would be hilarious if someone did that! )
He broke my heart...So I broke his JAW!!
I wish they sold hearts at walmart. I would buy them in bulk so when one gets broken I can shug it off and say it's ok I got more... then I would never feel this pain again. (Cheesy, yes. True? Yes.)
"Guys are like babies, you never really know exactly what they want, but we can make a pretty good guess."
Pass the liquor.. the boy is still ugly!
he Said "i love you" and i sneezed and said "ohh sorry;; But im Alergic to :.B.u.l.l.s.h.i.t.
Every time i walk pass you my words jummble into something stupid ...so i come out with somthing like...i like your phone...it's very small..(ackward silence)
I have skittles in my mouth... wanna taste the rainbow?
Virginity is like a bubble, one tiny prick and it's gone.
.heres to the guys that have us.the losers that lost us.& the lucky b-astards that will meet us.
Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes.
Boys are like trees, they take 50 years to grow up.
GUY: you look familiar
If nothing lasts forever, can i be your nothing?
Love is only a dirty trick played on us to achieve continuation of the species.
Men are like roses, you got to watch out for all the pricks.
When life gives you lemons trade them for guys.
Friends aren't suppose to be jealous
A secret admirier is only a stalker with stationary.
Girls don't make mistakes, we date them.
The hardest thing to do is watch the one you love, love someone else.
I've been diagnosed with Obsessive Curtis Disorder put this on your profile if you've caught it to!
("•.("•. * .•").•") •..STAY GOLD ..•» (.•"(.•" * "•.)"•.
*(·.·).I.(·.·)* * *(·.··. .·;Love·..··.·)* *·..·*The Outsiders*·.* * *·.(· Forever·)..·* * *·..·* *
I also came up with that one. xD Aren't I creative? Rotfl.
(.•"(.•" * "•.)"•.) SCREW A VAMPIRE IN A VOLVO I WANT A GREASER IN 501 LEVIS N CONVERSE (.•"(.•" * "•.)"•.)
Some of the greater things in life are unseen thats why you close your eyes when you kiss, cry, or dream...
My knight in shining armor turned out to be a loser in aluminum foil
Don't be suprised if a fat guy in a red suit stuffs u in a bag in the middle of the niight because i asked for you for christmas
Friend- I feel like I'm the third wheel
Oops! I appear to have fallen on your lips.
“I walk away from love, before it walks away from me!”
They call it puppy love? why not kitty love?
Having a guy dump you and say "We can still be friends"
He Said: I don't know why you wear a bra, you have nothing to put in it. She Said: You wear pants don't you?
He Said: How 'bout you whisper those three words I know you're dying to say. She Said: Go to hell.
He said: Bros before hoes, dude! She said: Then why on earth are you here?
A wise girl kisses but doesn't love, listens but doesn't believe, and leaves before she is left
16 THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART
HOW TO SUCCEED AT BEING A NORMALTEENAGER (In 15 easy steps): 1. The first step in becoming a normal, bland, and spineless individual is very simple. Never think. About anything. Ever. If you have a thought, let it go. Let someone else think for you. Thinking is hard. Let someone else do it. Save your little conformist brain cells for something less difficult. 2. Now let's talk about music. You like unique music? Not anymore! You get to listen to the same generic, repetitive sound that everyone else does. You know, that one beat over and over with the words "Yeah", "baby" and "ooh" being repeated. Lucky you! 3. To be normal, you've gotta dress normal. If you're a girl, that means you wear leggings as pants and cut up your t-shirts so they just barely cover your chest. Uggs are a must, for any time of the year, including midsummer. If you're a guy, you wear the hem of your pants on the back of your knees. Overly violent band t-shirts for bands that you only know one song for is highly recommended. Jerseys and shorts are the number one choice for extremely cold weather. 4. Now that you're dressed like the little snowflake you are, it's time to talk about relationships with your parents! The next time they ask you to perform a non time-consuming chore or a small favor, be sure to throw a complete tantrum in the kitchen. Tell them how much you hate them and how they don't accept your individuality, as they can see by your intuition in fashion. Be sure to include that they don't love you and that they wish you were never born. Follow this by running to your room and slamming your door off its hinges. If they attempt to speak to you at any time after this, lay face down on your bed and scream at them through your pillow. Scream about how no one loves you and let your excessive eye makeup run down your face, too. 5. To ensure that you're everyone's favorite person in the morning, don't ever sleep. It's recommended that you should stay up all night on Facebook chat, having the exact same conversation with nine different people. It should be going something like this: YOU: hey "FRIEND": hi YOU: wassup "FRIEND": nm, u YOU: nm "FRIEND": im bored YOU: same "FRIEND": wat r u doin YOU: nothing u "FRIEND": nothing YOU: lol "FRIEND": lol …And should continue this way until the wee hours in the morning. During this time, no homework should be done, and only caffeine and sugar filled foods should be consumed. 6. If someone offers you an alcoholic drink, TAKE IT. CHUG IT DOWN. YOU CAN'T AFFORD TO LOOK LIKE A LOSER WHO DOESN'T DRINK. YOUR LIFE DEPENDS ON IT. DRINK IT. DRINK IIIIIIIIIIT. 7. Speaking of your amazing friends that are so nice to you and you to them, you must remain in contact with them at all times. They have to know everything that's happening in your life, just like you need to know theirs. Every time you start and finish a meal, update your Facebook status. Each time you borrow your mom's car to drive to someone's house to do nothing but sit on their couch for three hours, you should tweet when you left, while you drive there, when you get there, while you're there, when you leave, on your way home, and when you get home. Your phone must be in your hand, or within five inches of it at all times. You can't afford to not have it. What if you miss an important tweet? Your friend could be eating a cheeseburger and you won't know about it! YOU NEED THAT PHONE. Treat it like your child. No, treat it BETTER than your child, which you'll likely have in the next two years. *Important Note: Don't forget to do it while you drive! 8. Go beat up/ridicule a gay kid. Even a kid you think is gay and really isn't. Assume that every guy in the school play and any girl not dressing like a slut is gay. 9. You must use these words/phrases a minimum of five times per minute: - 'Like' - 'Um' or 'Uh' - 'Ohmigod' - 'Literally' - 'Legit' - 'I know, right?!' - 'Dude' - A swear of some kind - 'THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!' - A misinterpretation of the word 'Irony' (And for those familiar with internet vernacular) - 'Derp' and/or 'Herp' - 'Fail' - 'FFFFFFUUUUUU' - 'ASDFASDFASDFASDFASDF' - 'WHAT IS THIS I DON'T EVEN' - Sentences that begin with 'Y U NO' - 'UR GAY' - 'FIRST!' 10. No matter how pretty, thin, and beautiful your outward appearance is, you must always dismiss yourself as "ugly", "disgusting", "hideous", etc. 11. Interpret EVERYTHING you see and hear as sexual. 12. You should ALWAYS expect sympathy from others no matter WHAT you do. Expect that your friends will cry and hug you when you tell them about that tragic weekend your mom took your phone away, ALL because you were caught driving drunk and having sex. 13. The only words you read should come from a TV, a computer screen, or your phone. Reading is for losers who don't have friends to text. 14. If you are doing poorly in any class, expect that the teacher secretly hates you. They really, really hate you. Even though you're doing awesome in that class, they give you bad grades because they are secretly trying to destroy you, and keep from you getting into the party school you want to go too, even though mommy and daddy will buy your way in there anyway. It's NEVER your fault. That teacher WANTS to see you crash and burn. Don't forget to say that to their face and to complain to all of your friends! 15. What's that? SOMEONE IS ACTING DIFFERENTLY FROM YOU! They are assaulting your individuality with individuality of their own! They don't listen to the music you do! They're a girl, and you can't even see their bra straps! How can she hope to be respected when she's not even a d-cup?! They're a guy and you can't even see their boxers! The smell of Axe body spray isn't activating your gag reflex! You know what you must do? ATTACK! DON'T LET THEM GET AWAY! How dare they act more intelligent and insightful than you, even though they are! DESTROY THEM PHYSICALLY AND MENTALLY! What's this?! THEY'RE GAY TOO? NO! THAT GOES AGAINST THE RELIGION YOU SAY YOU FOLLOW BUT REALLY DON'T! NOOOOOOO!*explode* CONGRATULATIONS, YOU ARE NOW A COMPLETELY NORMAL TEEN. Go cry now.
Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.
If you have ever wished you could materialize a hammer/frying pan/giant fan/ wrench/ect./ out of thin air to beat someone with, put this into your profile.
There is stupid coming out of your mouth hole again
God made man, and then he said, "I can do better than that," and made women.
So many boys, so many reasons to stay alone
I didn't mean to hurt your feelings...I was aiming for your face.
I wear black because it blends well with my soul.
A stranger stabs you in the front; a friend stabs you in the back; a boyfriend stabs you in the heart, but best friends only poke each other with straws.
The words 'Can you get up and do this simple thing for me?' never seem to register in my brain.
Deja vu- when you've done something you think you've done before, its because God thought it was so funny, he had to rewind it for his friends to see.
Would you like a cookie? So would I.
Well the voices and I took a vote. It's unanimous; you suck.
My mullet is better than yours . . . it's been blowtorched, and it comes OFF!
Knowledge is power and power corrupts. Study hard; be evil.
You are NOT a beautiful and unique snowflake. You are made of the same decaying organic matter as everyone else.
You have the right to swing first. However, if you choose to swing first, any move you make can and will be used as an excuse to beat the shit out of you. You have the right to have a doctor and a priest present. If you cannot afford a doctor or are not presently attending a church of your choice, one will be appointed to you. Do you understand what I just told you, Asshole??
I'm such a REBEL. I leave a message BEFORE the beep.
I Googled you today and I'm disturbed with what I found.
There's two kinds of people in the world, those who have a plan prepared for when the zombies take over the earth, and those who don't... We call those last people, dinner.
Irony: Falling down the stairs due to distraction by the "watch your step" sign.
"Never explain--your friends do not need it and your enemies will not believe you anyway"
Careful or you'll end up in my novel.
They lied. Hard work hurt a lot of people.
Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?
Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?
Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual labels on consumer goods:
On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. ( that's the only time I have to work on my hair).
On a bag of Fritos! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)?
On a bar o f Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how?...)
On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion).
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought?...)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?)
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and.. .I'm taking this because?...)
On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?)
On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)
On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands." (...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
Kids Are Quick
TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America .
TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
TEACHER: Glen, how do you spell 'crocodile?'
TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with ' I. '
TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?
TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?
TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
3 . My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
7. My mother taught t me IRONY.
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION .
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
19. My mother taught me ESP.
20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
Don't play stupid with me...I'm better at it!
People are like slinkies; basically useless, but ever so amusing to watch fall down the stairs.
I find 'good morning' a contradiction of terms.
Cute but psycho- things even out.
If you can't convince them, confuse them.
Hell issued a restraining order on me...oh the fun to be had!
My heart is not a playground
An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed.
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving isn't for you.
Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
A good lawyer knows the law, a great lawyer knows the judge (I laughed so hard on this one because my mom wants me to be a lawyer)
I have PMS and a gun... now what were you saying? (For me, it's a knife. Still works . . .)
Most people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them
What happens if you get scared half to death... twice?
Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one
I don't need your attitude. I got one of my own
It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not.
I'm looking forward to regretting this.
Fergie taught me how to spell delicious and glamorous. But not so much tastey!
Earth first. We'll screw up the other planets later
Never do anything that you wouldn't want to explain to the paramedics.
The dinosaurs extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came and they all committed suicide.
I run with scissors, it makes me feel dangerous.
Join the dark side. We have cookies!
I'm not always a dork- sometimes I'm asleep
I'm not insensitive, I just don't care
I had amnesia once--or twice. You know what? I don't really even remember.
Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.
They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people.
I don't take orders, and I don't deliver death wishes. If you wish to die, kill yourself.
Life isn't passing me by, it's trying to run me over.
A good girl is just a bad girl who's never gotten caught.
Who doesn't love comebacks that make the other person sound stupid?
Very few personal problems can't be solved through suitable application of high explosives.
Taste the rainbow- Eat CRAYONS!
There are three types of people: those who can count, and those who can't.
If the world were a logical place, men would be the ones who ride horses sidesaddle.
All things considered, insanity may be the only reasonable alternative.
Slinky Escalator = Endless fun!
Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is my ceiling.
Worst excuse for not turning in homework: I couldn't find anyone to copy it from.
He who laughs last thinks slowest.
The number of people watching you is directly proportional to the stupidity of your action.
When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
I'm not a complete idiot - some parts are missing.
Sometimes I wonder, "Why is the frisbee getting bigger?" Then I get hit in the face.
I see regular people! Run for your lives!
Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
If swimming is so good for your figure, how do you explain whales?
Experience is the thing you have left when everything else is gone.
When angry, count to ten, when very angry, swear.
If you always stop to smell the roses sooner or later you'll inhale a bee.
If you don't like my driving then stay off the sidewalk!
If you are reading this then step 1 of my EVIL PLAN is complete.
You say physco like it's a bad thing (some people just don't understand)
I'm not paranoid... WHICH ONE OF MY ENEMIES TOLD YOU THIS! (I bet it was Pot Mouse . . . he's always had it out for me.)
I hear voices, and they don't like you.
Normal people worry me.
Education is important, school however, is another matter.
I would be more scared if you were aiming for the person next to me.
What you call stupidity, I call selective understanding.
I think they named oranges before they named carrots. "Hey, what are these?" "They're Orange." "What about these?" "Ah Shit!"
If you're color blind, eating sweets must be a completely different experience. "Come on starbursts, give me red!... LEMON, DAMNIT!"
I'm not so good with the advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?
Always forgive your enemies - Nothing annoys them more.
Don’t mess with me. I've got a stick.
If two wrongs don't make a right, try three
I used to be normal, until I met the freaks that I call my friends.
You're just jealous because the voices are talking to me.
The greatest challenge in life is to find someone who knows all your flaws, differences, and mistakes, and yet still sees the best in you.
Therapist = The/rapist... scary thought
Dear Lord, I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him; And Patience for his moods; Because Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat him to death. AMEN.
I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
I intend to live forever *looks at watch* so far, so good
Old enough to know better, young enough to do it again.
Embrace the inner rebel - don't sit up straight
Sure I have super powers! I just don't wanna show you
You're awesome... but when the zombies come, I'm tripping you
I am not weird... just plotting
I don't obsess! I think intensely!
I was gifted, but the psychiatrist took away my super powers.
Smile; it makes people wonder what you're up to.
When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep - not screaming, like the passengers in his car.
I smile because I have no idea what's going on!
One day, your prince will come. Mine? Oh, he just took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions
One day, we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject
I write for the same reason I breathe; if I didn't I would die.
Don't knock on death's door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that.
Don't piss me off, I am running out of places to hide bodies!
Heaven doesn't want me and Hell is afraid I'll take over.
You know you're stressed out when you can hear mimes.
Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.
Of course I'm out of my mind! It's dark and scary in there!
I'm not afraid of death! What's it going to do? Kill me?
Between two evils, I always pick the one I've never tried.
Shit happens. But mostly to me, so don't worry
Questions to Ponder...
Why can pizza get to your house faster then an ambulance?
Why are they called apartments when they all stick together?
If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
Am I the only one who finds it scary that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is abbreviation such a long word?
If you try to fail and succeed, which have you done?
When the guy first discovered milk...what do you think he was doing?
On Sears hairdryer:
On a bag of Fritos:
On a bar of Dial soap:
On some Swann frozen dinners:
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
On Nytol sleep aid:
On a Korean kitchen knife:
On a string of Christmas lights:
On a food processor:
On Sainsbury's peanuts:
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
On a Swedish chainsaw:
On a child's Superman costume:
-Hello and welcome to the Mental Health Hot-line. If you are obsessive compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent ask someone to press 2 for you. If you have multiple personalities press 3, 4, 5. If you have A.D.D press 6 no 7 no 8 no 6 no 7 no 9 no 0 look shiny! If you are paranoid, we know what you are and what you want so stay on the line and we'll trace your call. If you are delusional press 7 and your call will be sent to the Mother Ship. If you are schizophrenic listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press. If you are depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, no one will answer you. If you are dislexic press 6, 9, 6, 9, 6, 9. If you have a nervous disorder fidget with the hatch key until the beep. After the beep, please wait for the beep. If you have short term memory loss, please try your call again later and if you have low self esteem, hang up; all our operators are too busy to talk to you
Dear Mathematics- I am not a therapist. Solve your own problems.
Warning: If zombies chase us, I'm tripping you.
If annoyed further, I shall spork your eyes out.
To some, silence is golden and ducktape is silver, but to me, they're one and the same.
Guns don't kill people, People with mustaches do.
If you're a girl who's tired of people assuming that just because you're a girl you love pink and can't fight to save your life, put this into your profile.
93 percent of teenagers would have an emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you are part of the 7 percent that would say "What was your first clue?", copy this onto your profile then add your name to the list:Sunlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A, Moonlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A.,Evil Genus of the C.O.C.A., Invador Miley Phantom, dAnnYsGiRl777, BloodySalvation, Lady Lost-A-Lot, BellaBookworm9, Bella Masen Cullen, Vampire Scooby, Alannaswarrior, Spottedlilly, Alleyanna Cullen, hugs.for.all.the.emo.boyz, I'll have some stupid Cliche, rainxface, maximumride24,FangsGirl24601, A Silenced Angel, UNDERLANDERfromtheOVERLAND, sunshine2006578, SareRide9, XXForrestStarXX, MelRose520, Anna Ride, FireBreathingCowGirlzWithWingz, iggsplosives, Randommonium135
If you've ever screamed at a book or the TV copy this!
If there are times where you just wanna annoy someone for the heck of it copy this into your profile
If a random song has ever popped into your head for no reason at all- copy and paste this into your profile.
-If you've ever burst out laughing while reading a book and people look at you funny-copy and paste this into your profile.
You say I've lost my sanity. Well I have news for you. You can't lose what you never had
Yeah, Im a loser. but the coolest loser you'll ever meet
Things I Am Not Allowed To Do At Hogwarts:
1) The Giant Squid is not an appropriate date to the Yule Ball.
2) I am not allowed to sing, "We're Off to See the Wizard" while skipping off to the Headmaster's office.
3) I am not allowed to take out a life insurance policy on Harry Potter.
4) I am not allowed to ask Dumbledore to show me the pointy hat trick.
5) I am not allowed to give Remus Lupin a flea collar.
6) I am not allowed to bring a Magic 8 Ball to Divination.
7) I am not allowed to say that Seamus Finnegan is "after me lucky charms."
8) I am not allowed to start a betting pool on this years Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. It's taste-less, tacky, and not a good money-making strategy.
9) I am not allowed to joke about Remus' "time of the month."
10) I am not allowed to make light saber sounds with my wand.
12) I am not to refer to the Accio charm as "The Force."
13) I am not allowed to claim that growing marijuana or hallucinogenic mushrooms is "Extra Herbology Work."
14) I will not use my socks to make hand-puppets of the Slytherin-House mascot.
15) If the thought of a spell makes me giggle for more than 15 seconds, assume that I am not allowed to use it.
16) I will not lock the Slytherins and Gryffindors in a room together and bet on which House will come out alive.
17) I will not charm the suits of armor to do a rendition of "The Knights of the Round Table" for the Christmas Feast.
18) I am not allowed to declare an official "Hug A Slytherin Day."
19) I am not allowed to sing my own personal spy music while wandering the hallways.
20) It is not necessary to yell, "BURN!" Whenever Snape takes points away from Gryffindor.
21) I will not say the phrase, "Get a Life" to Voldemort.
22) First years are not to be fed to Fluffy.
23) I will never ask Harry if his Voldie senses are tingling.
24) I will stop referring to showering as "Giving Moaning-Myrtle an eye-full."
25) I will not make, "OMGWTF" a spell.
26) It is not necessary to yell, "BAM" every time I Apparate.
27) I will not steal Gryffindor's sword from Dumbledore's office and use it to patrol the hallways.
28) I will not poke Hufflepuffs with spoons, nor shall I insist that their color's indicate that they're "covered in bees."
29) "I've heard every joke possible about Oliver Wood's name" is not a challenge.
30) I will not go to class skyclad.
31) I will not use Umbridge's quill to write, "Told you I was Hard Core."
32) If a class-mate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of that and draw a Dark Mark on their arm.
33) House Elves are not acceptable replacements for Bludgers.
34) I will not start every potion's class by asking Snape if the potion is acceptable as Body Lotion.
35) I will not call the Weasly twins, "bookends."
36) I will not call the Patil twins, "bookends."
37) I will not call the Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher Kenny, even if he is wearing an orange anorak.
38) There is no such thing as a were-thylacine.
39) I will not give Luna Lovegood Coast-To-Coast AM transcripts.
40) Tricking a school House Elf to strip of it's clothing does not make it mine. Yes, even when I yell out "PWND!"
41) I do not weigh the same as a Duck.
42) I do not have a Dalek Patronus.
43) I will not lick Trevor.
44) Gryffindor Courage does not come in bottles labeled, "Firewhiskey."
45) I will not dress up as Voldemort on Halloween.
46) It is a bad idea to tell Snape he takes himself to seriously.
47) I will not tell Sir Cadogan that The Knight's Who Say Ni have challenged him to a duel, then have all the students say, 'Ni' from various directions.
48) I am not the King of the Potato People and I do not have a flying carpet.
49) "To conquer the Earth with an army of flying monkeys" is not a career choice.
50) I will not tell the first years that Professor Snape is the Voice of God.
You know you're a writer...
-If you talk to yourself.
You: Can I copy your homework?
Year 13 : NO WAY! DO IT UR SELF!
Year 14: Only the first question
Year 15: *throws book at them* take it
Year 16: WHAT HOMEWORK?!!
CORRECTION! The most common lie is not 'I'm fine' because sometimes people are fine. The most common lie is:' I have read and agreed to the terms and use of conditions'
Boy: Will you go to the dance with me?
Girl: I already got a date
Boy: -whips out twix bar
Girl: WHAT IS THAT FOR?!
Boy: It worked in the commercials D:
"Hey I like your shirt"
"Thanks I like your..um thanks..."
Teacher: I AM GOING TO CALL YOUR MOM
Elementary: NNNNNNOOOOOOOOO PLEEEEAAAASSSSSSSEEE
Middle: Whatever -worries in head-
High School: TELL HER I SAID HI!!!!
A man clicked: FORGOT PASSWORD when trying to sign in to his email
The computer says: Password was sent directly to your email.
Mom buys banana suit for halloween
Age 6: BANANA!!!!!
Age 10: Really Mom?
Age 13: This is sooo embarrassing...
Age 16: IMA BANANA! IMA A BANANA! LOOK AT ME IMA BANANA!
Teacher: BILLY STOP MAKING UGLY FACES AT PEOPLE
Teacher: When I was your age, my parents told me if I kept making ugly faces, my face would stay ugly
Billy: Looks like your parents were right...
Spanish person: *speaks fast mad spanish*
Person: DUDE SLOW DOWN! DORA DIDN'T TEACH ME THAT YET!
Girl's status: *is now single*
Boy: Haha what a lose- wait that's my girl friend /:
Look at the keyboard: it says U and I together. Then below that says JK then next to that it says LOL then ends with a :P
NOW I AM SO SORRY IF U PEOPLE LIKE JUSTIN BIEBER. TERRIBLY SORRY BUT I SAW THIS ON FACEBOOK AND I JUST COULDN'T RESIST TO LAUGH
Mom turns on radio:
BABY BABY BABY OOH OH BABY BABY BABY OH
Girl: TURN THAT OFF!
Mom: she has a sweet voice :)
Girl:... That's Justin Bieber
Mom: O_o Justin is a boy name
Teacher leaves during a test:
Middle: *Whispers* Can I have gum?
High School: -yells from across the room- HEY WHAT'S NUMBER 1?!
Remember in third grade when the teachers said we need to learn cursive because we're going to use it for the rest of our lives?
Haha they lied
A girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle
Girl: Slow down, I'm scared!
Guy: No, this is fun.
Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.
Guy: Then tell me you love me.
Girl: I love you, now slow down!
Guy: Now give me a big hug.
She gives him a big hug
Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me.
In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she could live. If you would do this for a loved one copy and paste this onto your profile.
"Are you home?"
"... No I just happened to pick up my house phone at Burger King."
A black man walks into a cafe one early morning and noticed that he was the only black man there. As he sat down, he noticed a white man behind him. The white man said, "Coloured people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "When I was born I was black," "When I grew up I was black," "When I'm sick I'm black," "When I go in the sun I'm black," "When I'm cold I'm black," "When I die I'll be black." "But you sir..." "When you're born you're pink," "When you grow up you're white," "When you're sick, you're green," "When you go in the sun you turn red," "When you're cold you turn blue," "And when you die you turn purple." "And yet you have the nerve to call me coloured" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...
If you've ever run into a doorway that you clearly could've dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this into your profile.
There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy/paste this into your profile
92% of the teens have moved onto rap. If you are part of the 8 that still listens to real music, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random, or anything similar, copy this into your profile
Did you just call me a bitch? Well a bitch is a dog, and dogs bark, bark is on trees, trees are part of nature, nature is beautiful. So yeah, thanks for the compliment.
God created men first because you always make a rough draft before a masterpiece.
The next time you think your perfect, try walking on water.
Don't follow in my footsteps. I tend to walk into walls.
If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.
If you are odd, and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.
FANFICTION: MY ANTI-DRUG. because, who has time for drugs if you're reading and plotting and writing and checking reviews? If this is true for you, copy and paste this to your profile.
Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, than weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile!
If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile
If you are obsessed with something considered childish for someone your age, copy this into your profile
-"I understsand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no fucking way Paper can beat Rock. Paper is supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? Why the hell can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why isn't notebook paper constantly suffocating students while they take notes in class? I'll tell you why: because paper can't beat anybody; a rock would tear that shit up in 2 seconds. When I play rock/paper/scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to beat me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my already clenched fist and say, "Oh shit, I'm sorry. I thought paper would protect you, you asshole!"
If you hate people who think that they are everything, copy and paste this into your profile.
REMEMBER WHEN .. getting HiGH meant swinging at a playground?the worst thing you could get from a boy was c0otiEs?'m 0 m' was your heroand 'D a D' was the boy you were gonna marry?when your W0RST ENEMiES were your siblingsand rAcE iSsuEs were about who ran fastest?when - WAR- was a card gameand life was simple and care free?remember when all you wanted to doWAS GROW UP?
98% of teens would be dead if Twilight said breathing wasn't cool. Post this if you are a part of the 2% laughing.
I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian
I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.
I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.
We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.
I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.
I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me.
I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again.
I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear.
We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.
I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.
I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.
I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.
I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.
I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.
I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I did not have to always deal with society hating me.
I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.
I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love.
I am the person who is afraid of telling his loving Christian parents he loves another male.
Re-post this if you believe homophobia is wrong. Please do your part to end it.
1) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, liposuction and air conditioning.
2) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.
3) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.
4) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.
5) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Britney Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.
6) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.
7) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.
8) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we only have one religion in America. 9) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.
10) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans...
Re-post this if you believe in legalizing gay marriage.
You Know You're Obsessed With Maximum Ride When...
1. You're friends think you're crazy for being obsessed with six flying kids and their talking dog. 2. You see someone in a white lab coat then run off screaming. 3. You've called one of your siblings/friends/family members Max, Fang, Iggy, Nudge, Gazzy, or Angel. 4. You refuse to talk to anyone who's named Ari. 5. You claim you have wings. 6. You drool when you hear the word 'Fang'. 7. You daydream about meeting the flock. 8. You've reread Maximum Ride about 3 times or more. 9. You look for the flock's theme songs and get excited when you find one that fits perfect. 10. You study about birds. 11. You hate science class/refuse to dissect any type of animal. 12. You have a crush on Iggy or Fang or both. 13. You read Fang's blog daily. Even though you know it's JP talking. 14. You're waiting for your 'Nick Ride'. 15. You are counting down the days for the next book. 16. You will go to the first opening for the movie, even if it's at midnight. 17. You look in the mirror cautiously to make sure your reflection is not an Eraser. 18. You hate dog crates. 19. You think scientists are evil. 20. You argue with people if Max is a girl's name or a guy's. 21. When your spending the night at a friend's, you say you'll take first watch. 22. You've found a new respect for blind people. 23. You think MR is the best series ever and you want to meet James Patterson, author.And kill him. 24. You say 'U and A' a lot. 25. You think you have a Voice like Max. 26. You've gotten your Online Friends hooked on it. 27. You use sarcastic remarks from MR. 28. You know what 'Fax' is. 29. You were one of the characters from MR for Halloween. 30. You claim to have brain attacks. 31. You protect your thoughts. Angel might be reading them. 32. You give a crazy look to people who don't know what MR is. 33. You daydream of flying. 34. You love chocolate chip cookies. 35. You seriously felt like you were in the book. 36. If you want to become a writer because of MR 37. If they make a poster, shirt, key-chain, button, anything MR you will buy it. 38. If you love Fan-fiction. 39. In school, it's hard to concentrate because you're thinking of Maximum Ride. 40. You want a talking dog. It's sad, really...
Things Maximum Ride has Taught Us: 1. Being different is okay. 2. Even the little things can help save the world. 3. Red-heads are evil!! 4. Love always makes itself known. Even if it takes you five books and fourteen years of your life to see it, it's there. 5. 6-year-olds do have the ability to take over the world. 6. Duct tape is a handy tool if you have a mimicking 8-year-old. 7. The loss of a vet would be a tragedy. 8. Dressing in dark clothes and never talking does not make you emo; it makes you Fang-like. 9. French is the universal language. 10. Fang-sized is an acceptable form of measurement. 11. Count your blessings. 12. Teen magazines don't help you in life or death situations. 13. Nachos and Moutain Dew are proper mind controlling devices. 14. Fang has the power to sum up your life story in nine words. 15. Even a kick-ass, leader of a merry band of mutants like Max can make mistakes. 16. Never get hooked on Valium. 17. The best breed of dogs are talking Scotties!! 18. If one cannot be corrupted by power or money, there's always Snicker's bars. 19. It is okay to sell your soul for a chocolate-chip cookie. 20. Kids are better than adults. 21. You'll know the Apocalypse is coming when Max is wearing a dress. 22. The best cooks are blind pyros. 23. Submarines are tiny tin cans of doom. 24. Desert rat should always be cooked to well-done. 25. School really is an evil place. 26. Teachers really are out to get you. 27. Remember to flap. 28. Only one bird kid could pull off preppy Top-Siders. 29. GIRLS KICK BOYS' BUTTS!! 30. The order of power: God, Jesus, Chuck Norris, Max, Fang, Angel, Iggy, Gazzy, Nudge, Total, humans, animals. Brigid, Sam and Lissa don’t make the list.
I was walking around in a Target store, when I saw a cashier hand this little boy some money back. The boy couldn't have been more than 5 or 6 years old. The cashier said, "I'm sorry, but you don't have enough money to buy this doll."
Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him: ''Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?''
The old lady replied: ''You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.'' Then she asked him to stay there for just 5 minutes while she went to look a round. She left quickly. The little boy was still holding the doll in his hand. Finally, I walked toward him and I asked him who he wished to give this doll to.
"It's the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for Christmas. She was sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her."
I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus would bring it to her after all, and not to worry.
But he replied to me sadly. "No, Santa Claus can't bring it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there." His eyes were so sad while saying this. "My sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mommy is going to see God very soon too, so I thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.''
My heart nearly stopped.
The little boy looked up at me and said: "I told daddy to tell mommy not to go yet. I need her to wait until I come back from the mall." Then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing. He then told me "I want mommy to take my picture with her so she won't forget me. I love my mommy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister." Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly.
I quickly reached for my wallet and said to the boy. "Suppose we check again, just in case you do have enough money for the doll?''
"OK," he said, "I hope I do have enough." I added some of my money to his without him seeing and we started to count it. There was enough for the doll and even some spare money. The little boy said: "Thank you God for giving me enough money!" Then he looked at me and added, "I asked last night before I went to sleep for God to make sure I had enough money to buy this doll, so that mommy could give it to my sister. He heard me! I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but I didn't dare to ask God for too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose. My mommy loves white roses." A few minutes later, the old lady returned and I left with my basket. I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when I started. I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind. Then I remembered a local newspaper article two days ago, which mentioned a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car occupied by a young woman and a little girl. The little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-sustaining machine, because the young woman would not be able to recover from the coma. Was this the family of the little boy? Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read in the newspaper that the young woman had passed away. I couldn't stop myself as I bought a bunch of white roses and I went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wishes before her burial. She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest. I left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed forever.. The love that the little boy had for his mother and his sister is still, to this day, hard to imagine. And in a fraction of a second, a drunk driver had taken all this away from him.
Now you have 2 choices: 1) Repost this message. 2) Ignore it as if it never touched your heart
98 percent of all teenage girls would give their souls to Edward Cullen if he was stabbed with a wooden stake. Post this on your profile if you're part of the 2 percent that stabbed him.
98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile
There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. When you argue with yourself and LOSE is when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile.
Did you know the average American only reads 3 books a year? If you don't believe that it's even possible to read that little, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If there are times where you just wanna annoy someone for the heck of it copy this into your profile
96 of teenage girls obsess over Twilight, put this in your signature if you're one of the 4 who like stories where the vampires are actually portrayed as monsters, and not as pretty people with fangs
If you like to pretend that Fred Weasley never died, copy and paste this on to your profile.
If your parents have to lock up your books because you read too much, copy and paste this into your profile
If you believe that straight, gay, bi, and lesbian people are all equal and entitled to their beliefs, copy and paste this into your profile
If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile.
If it completely pisses you off when someone says being gay is gross, then copy and paste this into your profile.
If you were insane, crazy, and/or random, before being crazy, insane, and/or random was cool, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you know someone who should be run over by a bus, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you can freak someone out just by glaring at them, copy and paste this on your profile.
If Fanfiction to you is what MySpace is to other people, copy this into your profile.
If you've ever pushed on a door that said pull or vice-versa copy and paste this in to your profile
If you ever tripped over your own feet, copy this into your profile.
If you are in lala land most of the time copy this onto your profile.
If you've ever threatened your computer, copy and paste this into your profile.
If, for no reason, you have laughed during a movie part that wasn't funny, put this in your profile
Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Yavie Aelinel, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Shadow929, SweetNCrazieSugarmuffin, The Komodo Dragon Phoenix, Empress Caroline of Tamaran, monkyluvr, Darth KenObi-Wan, JediWolfMaster,EwanLuvr4Ever, xXJedi Knight BlazeXx, JaneVolturi, LOSTSOULOFTHEUNDERWORLD, DarkAngel620, Dithinus, Arana'a, GuardianAngel-Raven
service-sector economy, or longer life spans...
If you've ever threatened a computer or video game console, copy and paste this into your profile.
I once read that only math can save us now. Put this in your profile if you're screwed.
If you ever suffered from FanFiction withdraw copy this into your profile!
If you think Orochimaru is what you get when Michael Jackson and Voldemort have unprotected sex, C&P this into your profile.
If you are constantly comparing pairings from other animes and mangas, copy and paste this into your profile
FANFICTION: MY ANTI-DRUG. because, who has time for drugs if you're reading and plotting and writing and checking reviews? If this is true for you, copy and paste this to your profile. -- Damn straight.
If you hear voices in your head, copy and paste this onto your profile!
If your still reading this then copy and paste this onto your profile
"I'm only good at making eggs one way and that's boiling them. But even then they constantly blow up in my face."