Author has written 7 stories for Greek Mythology, Lady or the Tiger, Thief Lord, Iliad, and Hetalia - Axis Powers.
;D Congratz! You found the Awesome me's page
First of all I am a homosapien.
I love Axis Powers Hetalia on fanfiction and I enjoy reading many other mangas in my spare time. My hobbies include reading, playing fighting games (like Mortal Kombat), shooting games (like Black Ops), good RPGs (like some of the Final Fantasies), writing, and cooking/baking. I have no shame in admitting that I am a choc-a-holic.
I am in love with Russia and America from Hetaila and I REALLY think RussiaXAmerica fics are Awesome. Prussia is pretty Awesome too but, not as Awesome as he thinks he is.
I go the best school in the nation and love it. All my subjects are Awesome, just not all my teachers.
I am six foot, have over three foot long blond hair that feels like silk after being brushed, size ten feet, blue/gray/green eyes (they like to change on the totally Awesome me), and can mimic a Irish accent bloody good if you ask me. For all you Hetalia fans out there, my friends have asked me to play Belarus on many occasions because of my physical similarities. And probably also because I have tendencies to get violent while I am really mad. If you guessed that the Awesome me is girl, you would be correct! But I’ve been beginning to notice I have some guyish tendencies.
I find nothing wrong with a same sex relationship and will probably find something wrong with anybody un-Awesome enough to think otherwise.
And now for some Awesome stuff that is almost as Awesome as the Awesome me.
Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss. —Douglas Adams
Suicide is a persons way of saying to God, "You can't fire me, I quit." -Unknown
"The object of war is not to die for your country, it's to make the other bastard die for his." —General George S. Patton
"I'm tired of all the nonsense about beauty being only skin deep. That's deep enough. What do you want, an adorable pancreas?" —Jean Kerr
"You are not special. You are not a beautiful or unique snowflake. You are the same decaying organic matter as everyone else." —Chuck Palahniuk
"Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes." —Jim Carrey
"Never fight an inanimate object." —P.J. O'Rourke
"I can picture in my mind's eye a world without war, a world without hate, and I can picture us attacking that world, because they'd never expect it." —Jack Handy
America (Alfred F. Jones)
You love hamburgers ()
You think you're awesome (x)
You love to invent things (x)
You love going to the cinema/watching films/making films (x)
You can seem to be very brash to other people ()
You have a tendency to stick your nose into other peoples' business (x)
You're terrified of ghosts ()
You know aliens exist (x)
You tend to wear a bomber jacket all the time ()
You wear glasses ()
(5/10) ... but I'M STILL THE HERO!!!
England (Arthur Kirkland)
You like tea (x)
You were quite tough as a kid (x)
You're very sarcastic and cynical ()
Your cooking is awful ()
You love spiritual magical stuff, such as fairies, ghosts... (x)
...But you refuse to believe in aliens ()
You have tried doing black magic before ()
You get drunk quite easily ()
When you are drunk, you tend to be very unhappy ()
You're good at embroidery ()
France (Francis Bonnefoy)
You're very affectionate (x)
You think you have a great fashion sense (x)
You like wine ()
You're the master of whispering romantic things into peoples' ears ()
You love red roses ()
When it comes to l'amour, you don't mind men or women (x)
You're very proud of yourself (x)
You love culture and the arts (x)
You're very flamboyant ()
You say you're a gourmet ()
Russia (Ivan Braginski)
You had a very sad childhood (x)
You're very tall (x)
You have a tendency to switch between personalities (x)
You wear a scarf all the time ()
You love sunflowers (x)
You love vodka ()
You can seem intimidating to other people (x)
You're very strong (x)
You have a big nose ()
You have a strange laugh that can scare people (x)
China (Wang Yao)
You're very mature ()
You're very superstitious (x)
You're very religious ()
You love pandas (x)
You love cooking so much that you nag if food has a certain pattern of tastes ()
You love Hello Kitty ()
You try to be a role-model for your brothers/sisters/whatever, but are never taken seriously ()
You work hard (x)
You're good at drawing ()
You like sweets (x)
North Italy (Feliciano Vargas)
You were bullied a lot in your childhood ()
You adore pasta, pizza, cheese, and fruit (x)
You're very happy-go-lucky ()
You constantly have a dozy look on your face as if you're always away with the fairies ()
You have a long curly strand of hair that always tends to stick up ()
You're a good artist ()
You can be clumsy at times ()
You have a friend you always depend upon if you mess up something ()
If your life was in danger, you would do the typical Italian thing and say: "PLEASE DON'T KILL ME! I HAVE RELATIVES IN YOUR COUNTRY!" ()
You would surrender in a war situation ()
You're very stoic and serious ()
Sausages are your favorite foods ()
You like to walk dogs/your dog ()
Your boss/principal/tutor/home-room teacher is a nut-case ()
You love rules and think they should always be followed to a T ()
You think the world would be better if everyone played by the rules ()
You work very hard (x)
Your alone time is your 'happy time' ()
You can appear tough but be very considerate towards people ()
You've had issues with money once or twice (x)
Japan (Kiku Honda)
You're very mature (x)
You think everything over before saying it ()
You believe in ghosts but aren't phased by the experience when you see one (x)
You isolated yourself during childhood (x)
You became very successful in a short amount of time (x)
You are somewhat inexperienced when it comes to the outside world ()
You can seem cold/aloof to other people ()
You're good at practical tasks (x)
You need time to adjust to new people ()
You are an otaku - an Anime or Manga crazy person (x)
Austria (Roderich Edelstein)
You are very well-raised (x)
You're polite (x)
You love classical music (x)
You like cake (x)
You have a mole on your face ()
You dedicate your time to your hobbies rather than what needs to be done right away (x)
You are a virtuoso/play very well on at least one instrument (x)
You've composed music before (x)
You tend to call people 'morons' (x)
You wear glasses ()
Canada (Matthew Williams)
You're often ignored by people ()
You look younger than you actually are ()
You love hockey ()
You love polar bears (x)
You hate fighting ()
You have one strand of curly hair, like Italy ()
You often get mistaken for someone else ()
You feel under-appreciated ()
You're bilingual ()
You always carry a bear with you ()
(1/10) one. . .
You smoke ()
You're very physically strong (x)
You've won a lot of fist-fights ()
In your social circle, there are two brothers - you get along with one, but not with the other ()
You have very strong emotions about a variety of topics (x)
You like hot weather ()
You can be very friendly from time to time ()
You look very tough on the outside ()
You make a very nice role-model (x)
You don't let people get a word in edgeways ()
Hungary (Elizaveta Hédeváry)
You have a potty-mouth ()
You like to wear flowers in your hair ()
You used to be a very tough kid (x)
You're very reliable (x)
It's better to have you as a friend rather than an enemy (x)
You're very faithful (x)
Your speech and mannerisms can be considered very unladylike (x)
You and your best friend go together like chalk and cheese ()
You are graceful one moment and grinning like a maniac the next (x)
If someone yells that yaoi is going on somewhere, you will drop everything to run off to go and see it (x)
Lithuania (Toris Lorinaitis)
You're very loyal (x)
You feel like your best friend drags you around a lot, but you both have a great time together ()
You're very serious (x)
You have a lot of patience (x)
You think too much about philosophical stuff (x)
You get depressed when questioning the point of existing/the universe, etc... ()
You're not very confident ()
You were quite rebellious as a child (x)
People tend to walk all over you ()
You're a born worrier ()
Poland (Feliks Łukasiewicz)
You love the color pink ()
You have a friend that you always walk all over ()
No matter what happens, you tend to revive like a Phoenix (x)
You act before you think (x)
You are first very shy and hard to get friendly with ()
….but after you DO get friendly, you act like you're a King towards them ()
You are able to talk like the opposite gender ()
You talk with words such as "like" and "totally" ()
You seem like a clown but you're actually quite delicate ()
You love ponies (x)
Spain (Antonio Fernandez Carriedo)
You love tomatoes (x)
You're a bright thinker (x)
You have a country-bumpkin like atmosphere ()
You're kinda insensitive ()
You tend to go along with other people's thoughts or plans ()
You're scary when you're angry (x)
You're passionate (x)
You have a person that you care for dearly, but they don't seem to appreciate you that much ()
People should NOT get near you when you had alcohol ()
You have people that are Best Friends, but rivals at the same time ()
South Italy (Lovino Vargas)
You have a younger sibling that you don't get along well with ()
…but you kinda rely on them anyway ()
You're friendly to girls (x)
…but you're strict and unsocial towards guys ()
You act strong but actually, you're a wimp ()
On some parts, you're weaker than your younger sibling ()
You have someone that cares for you dearly but you think of them as annoying ()
You love your family, but you just don't show it ()
You're truthful to yourself, in some cases (x)
You love pasta, pizza, gelato, and fruits (x)
Prussia (Gilbert Beilschmidt)
You have a younger sibling that you always count on ()
You're slightly aggressive (x)
You think you're totally awesome (x)
You have a pet bird ()
You're loyal to your superiors/parents/teachers (x)
You're actually punctual, strict and serious, you just don't seem like it ()
Some people you like, some people you just hate like insane ()
You tend to pick on some people (x)
You have an old friend that you just can't beat no matter what ()
You have good friends, but they're not exactly the best people you can find (x)
Switzerland (Vash Zwingli)
You stay neutral in thing no matter what ()
You are reclusive ()
You seem peaceful, but you'll fight if you have to ()
You work hard on things until they're done (x)
You can't get along friendly with other people ()
But, you're kind towards siblings ()
You're actually quite strong (x)
You have a lot of money ()
You seem difficult to get along with, but you're actually kind and caring ()
You had a hard past ()
Korea (Im Yong-Soo)
You care a lot about your family (x)
You love watching movies, and creating things (x)
You're stronger than you seem (x)
You're a Going-My-Way person (x)
You love kimchi ()
You're mysterious, and people can't tell what you're thinking (x)
You tend to piss off your elders ()
You like to claim things as yours ()
You love games and Internet (x)
You're slightly perverted ()
Finland (Tino Väinämöinen)
You love Christmas and Santa (x)
You're honest and quiet ()
You are good at high-tech machinery (x)
You like coming up with weird things (x)
You sense of taste is bad, as people say ()
You tend to fight against people who are stronger than you ()
You let people poke you around for a while, but then you get them back ten times worse ()
You love saunas ()
You're generous, but you also have a scary side as well (x)
For some reason, you have weird naming skills (x)
Sweden (Berwald Oxenstierna)
You don't talk much, and you tend to stay quiet ()
You're honest, serious, and love debates (x)
You're actually passionate, but you just don't show it ()
People think you're scary (x)
You're clever with your hands (x)
You make weapons with things that people don't imagine ()
You're clumsy with human relationships ()
You tend to go against stronger people (x)
You give up pretty quick ()
In the inside, you're smiling. On the outside, you're glaring (x)
I am the kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.
I am the working in the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.
I am the sister who holds her gay brother through painful, tear-filled nights.
We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.
I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.
I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me.
I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again.
I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks from graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear.
We are the couple who had the Realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom apartment for two men.
I am the person who never knows what bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.
I am the mother who is not allowed to visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system suddenly grow cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.
I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.
I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me only s do that.
I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized that I was transsexual.
I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I didn't have to always deal with society hating me.
I am the man who stopped attending church. Not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.
I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love.
I am the person who is afraid of telling his loving Christian parents that he loves another male.
-Repost this if you believe homophobia is wrong-
I am the girl...that doesn't go to school dances and and when I do I sit and read in the corner. I am the they look through when I say something. I am the who spends most of her free time reading or writing or other things teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the people call weird or freak either behind me or to my face. I am the that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the who stops to smell the flowers or has stopped to splash in the rain.
But I am also the who knows and is proud of who she is. I am the who doesn't care if people call her weird (it's a compliment) and loves reading and writing and all the things people don't have time for anymore, who loves an dis obsessed with FanFiction, who can express herself better with words then anyone else, and knows the importance of the little things.
Copy and paste this so that even though you are unique, you are not alone.
or people that stereotypes: If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile.
I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE , so I MUST be a ditz.
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a ist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a , so I MUST be a ...
I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a whore.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do .
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a or emo.
I'm a WHITE , so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of friend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking .
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible .
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be ing them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS so I MUST be a player.
I have Big boobs, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and thats how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi!
I hang out with GAYS, so i must be GAY TOO!
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas
I'm a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction
I'm a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude
I'm STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE R, so I MUST be ugly.. or crazy.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals!
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a ist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
I'm so goth I MUST worship the devil!
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on (or was on) a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a bitch!
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small .
I'm a GUY , so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a wimp!
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a AMERICAN, so I MUST want everyone to see my way!
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER stoner, .. So I MUST be a myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse
I’m a , so I MUST be a ist I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I must be homosexual.
I draw so I MUST be a freak.
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I WATCH PORN, so I MUST be perverted.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak.
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant friend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with equality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like horror movies, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A ER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a ney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT, I MUST be having cyber .
I'm CELCTIC, so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the of virgins
I'm so I MUST worship
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a BI, so I MUST want to get with every single that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I am N, so I MUST be a IST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a IST.
I am a WICCAN , so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast
I like CARTOONS , and COMICS, so I MUST be childish
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic .
I'm IC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo’s
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want/have a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED
Don't take away the right of a person to be treated like a decent human being just because they are not like you.
Copy & Paste
If Fanfiction to you is what MySpace, Facebook, and Twitter is to other people, copy this into your profile.
98 percent of the teenage population does or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever heard the voices of the characters of the book you're reading in your head...copy/paste this into your profile.
If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.
98 of people online don't know the difference between your and you're. If you're (HA) one of the 2 who twitches violently every time somebody uses the wrong form, put this in your profile
If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile
Ever ran into a wall or part of one, copy and paste into your profile.
If there are times when you just wanna annoy people for the heck of it then copy this into ya profile.
If you have ever felt the undenilable urge to slam your head into something, whether it is another person or not copy this into your profile
SPLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!! If you are really random put this on your profile.
If you have ever zoned out for five consecutive minutes copy this on your profile.
If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say right before you were going to say it copy this on your profile.
If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you sometimes talk to yourself copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you would absolutely love waking up in a different dimension full of magic, put this into your profile.
If you threaten inanimate objects put this on your profile.
If you've ever had a mad laughing fit for basicially no reason, add this to your profile.
If you ever threatened a computer or video game console, add this to your profile.
I'm bored...If you're bored then paste this in your profile and let the world know you have nothing to do...
If you love Fanfiction.net, copy and paste this into your profile.
I like rice paper. I have seen purple cows. If two gooses are geese, then why aren't two moose meese, or when two foots are feet, why aren't two footballs feetball? Rum balls taste good. People call me crazy, but I'm just random! If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile!
If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.
If you've ever walked into a door (or any other inaminate objects like walls), copy this onto your profile.
If you hate those obnoxious preppy people PLEASE copy this in your profile.
If you and your friends have a nickname, title, or anything else for each other, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you have ever gotten so completely sidetracked in a conversation that you don't remember why you were talking in the first place, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever gotten so completely sidetracked in a conversation that you don't remember why you were talking in the first place, copy this into your profile.
FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.
BEST FRIENDS:Would be sitting next to you sayin "THAT WAS FRICKING AWSOME"
FRIENDS:Only know a few things about you.
BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...
FRIENDS: Will always be like "well you deserve better".
BEST FRIENDS: Will prank call him and say " you'll die in 7 days"
FRIENDS: Will comfort you when you get rejected
BEST FRIENDS: Will go up to him and say " its because your gay isn't it"
FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you
Some people are like slinkies, they're good for nothing, but they sure make you laugh when you push 'em down a flight of stairs
Don't follow in my footsteps, I walk into walls
The shinbone: A device used for finding furniture in a dark room
You cry, I cry. You laugh, I laugh. You fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder
I'm the type of person who walks into a door and apologizes.
If you've ever threatened a computer repost this
chainsaw beats scizzors, paper, AND rock!
I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it!
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question copy and repost.
My best friend is the type of person who'll spend hours trying to drown a fish, but I love her to death anyway.
Perfection is overrated.
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kickboxing!
Copy and repost if you've ever been bothered by someone who thought they know you better than you know yourself
I agree with the dictionary
Girls before Guys
Fun before Studying
Friendship before Love
Last night I lay in my bed looking up at the stars in the sky. They were amazingly beautiful, but the only thing I could think of was: What the hell did I do to my ceiling?
Hate: A special kind of love we give to people who suck.
Stress: The body's punishment for overriding the desire to strangle some jerk who deserved it.
If you've ever crashed into a wall when you were not sugar-high repost this
Can I get caller ID for the voices in my head?
R.I.P.- Albus Dumbledore, Sirius Black, Hedwig, Mad-Eye-Moody, Severus Snape, Remus Lupin, Nymphadora Tonks, Dobby, Colin Creevey, Fred Weasly, Cedric Diggory, and everyone else who had to die to make the Harry Potter series as great as it is.
1.) A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft. house 4 inches deep.
2.) If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.
3.) A 3-year old boy's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.
4.) If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20x20 ft. room.
5.) You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.
6.) The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.
7.) When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh oh", it's already too late.
8.) Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
9.) A six-year old boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36-year old man says they can only do it in the movies.
10.) Certain Lego's will pass through the digestive tract of a 4- year old boy.
11.) Play dough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence.
12.) Super glue is forever.
13.) No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still can't walk on water.
14.) Pool filters do not like Jell-O.
15.) VCR's do not eject "PB & J" sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.
16.) Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
17.) Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.
18.) You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.
19.) Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do not like ovens.
20.) The fire department in Austin , TX has a 5-minute response time.
21.) The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.
22.) It will, however, make cats dizzy.
23.) Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.
24.) 80 percent of women will pass this on to almost all of their friends, with or without kids.
25.) 80 percent of men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake fluid.
If you think Orochimaru is what you get when Michael Jackson and Voldemort have unprotected sex, copy and paste this into your profile
If you hear voices of characters in your head...copy and paste this on you're profile.
If you ever threatened a computer copy and paste this in your profile.
If you ever threatened a fictional character copy this into you're profile.
If several inanimate objects hate you copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have inside jokes...with yourself...copy and paste this into your profile.
If you should be doing homework right now... copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.
I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that crap up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you."
Although, chainsaw beats scissors, paper, AND rock!
We know exactly where one cow with mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in America , but we haven't a clue as to where thousands of Illegal immigrants and Terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of immigration!
"He who laughs last didn't get it." - Unknown
"You laugh because I'm different. I laugh because you're all the same." - Unknown
"When there's a will, I want to be in it." - Unknown
A friend helps you up when you fall a best friend continues walking while saying, "Walk much dumbass?"
A friend gives you their umbrella in the rain a best friend takes yours and says, "RUN, -BEEP- RUN!"
A friend wipes your tears when you're rejected a best friend goes up to him and says, "It's because you're gay isn't it?"
A friend will bail you out of jail. A best friend would be in the room next to you saying, "THAT WAS AWESOME , LET'S DO IT AGAIN!!"
Friends will ask you why you are crying but best friends already have a shovel ready to bury the loser that made you cry.
She's my best friend, break her heart and I'll break your face!
I used to be normal, until I met those losers I now call my best friends!
A friend would call you a retard but a best friend would call you one and act like one with you.
A best friend is a girl you can call in the middle of the night and say you killed someone and she would say "Where should we hide the body."
A friend will laugh at you when you play the air guitar a best friend will be standing there next to you doing the drum beat on your head A friend will know your favorite pop song a best friend will know your sercreatly into death heavy metal Friends will love your mom, best friends will want to marry your mom so they can officiaclly be your father A friend will start talking like you, with a best friend it will make no sense when you talk A friend will try and find you a date to the dance, a best friend will be your date A friend will tell you "yes you do look good in that dress!" a best friend will be telling you, in detail, how hidious you appear A friend will take a bullet for you, a best friend will be the one pulling the trigger A friend know of the guy you like, a best friend knows all twelve of them A friend will keep track of the guy you like a best friend will track the guy you love A friend will try and calm you down when your pissed, a best friend will be cracking jokes until your over it
My friends are people who would spend hours trying to drown a fish but I love them to death!
"Some people are like Slinkies. They're really good for nothing. But they still really bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs."
"If you can't laugh at yourself make fun of other people"
To put it nicely, I hope you choke
"True love is when you don't want to sleep because real life is so much better than a dream"
used to be indicisive, now I'm not sure
It's you and me versus the world...we attack at dawn
I'm not insensitive, I just don't care
When the going gets tough, the tough get duct tape
15 percent of every high school population is considered "Popular". 20 percent is desperate to become a part of the popular 15 percent. 20 percent couldn't care less. 15 percent realize that popularity doesn't matter. 10 are too busy worrying about their grades to care. 5 percent are goths, 5 percent can speak another language fluently, and 5 percent are too stupid to realize that no one likes them. If you are a part of the 5 percent who think the 'unpopular' 85 percent should rebel against the popular 15 percent, copy this into your profile and add your name to the list: Sunlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Moonlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., DigiDestined of Balance, Jingo4754, Hari-hime, mimiminite
A black man walks into a cafe one early morning and noticed that he was the only black man there. As he sat down, he noticed a white man behind him. The white man said, "Coloured people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said:
"When I was born I was black," "When I grew up I was black," "When I'm sick I'm black," "When I go in the sun I'm black," "When I'm cold I'm black," "When I die I'll be black."
"But you sir..."
"When you're born you're pink," "When you grow up you're white," "When you're sick, you're green," "When you go in the sun you turn red," "When you're cold you turn blue," "And when you die you turn purple." "And yet you have the nerve to call me colored."
The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...
Copy this onto your site and help stop racism!
If you can read this message, you are blessed, because over two billion people in the world cannot read at all:
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg.
The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae.
The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.
Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling was ipmorantt! Tahts so cool!
If you can read that please put it in your profile.
16 THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART
1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.
2. Set all the alarm clocks in Electronics to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, " 'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.
5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
6. Move a 'CAUTION -WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
9. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti -depressants are.
11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme song.
12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.
13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream.. "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!
16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "pikachu, I choose you!"
Repost this if you laughed... Or are planning to do any of these things...
On Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)
On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (The shoplifter special!)
On a bar of Dial soap: Directions: Use like regular soap. (and that would be how?)
On some Swann frozen dinners: Serving suggestion: Defrost. (But it's just a suggestion!)
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box) Do not turn upside down. (Too late! You lose!)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: Product will be hot after heating. (Are you sure? Let's experiment.)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: Do not iron clothes on body. (But wouldn't that save more time?)
On Boot's Children's cough medicine: Do not drive car or operate machinery. (We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds with colds off those fork lifts.)
On Nytol sleep aid: Warning: may cause drowsiness. (One would hope!)
On a Korean kitchen knife: Warning: Keep out of children. (Hmm..something must have gotten lost in the translation...)
On a string of Christmas lights: For indoor or outdoor use only. (As opposed to use in outer space.)
On a food processor: Not to be used for the other use. (Now I'm curious.)
On Sainsbury's peanuts: Warning: Contains nuts. (but no peas?)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts. (Somebody got paid big bucks to write this one.)
On a Swedish chainsaw: Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands. (Raise your hand if you've tried this.)
On a child's Superman costume: Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly. (Oh, go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief.)
7 reasons not to mess with children:
A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.
The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah".
The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"
The little girl replied, "Then you ask him ".
A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work.
As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was.
The girl replied, "I'm drawing God."
The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like."
Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, "They will in a minute."
A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments withher five and six year olds
After explaining the commandment to "honor" thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"
Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, "Thou shall not kill."
The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.
"Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a doctor.'
A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher, she's dead."
A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood.
Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face."
"Yes," the class said.
"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?"
A little fellow shouted, "Cause your feet ain't empty."
The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch.
At the head of the table was a large pile of apples.
The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: "Take only ONE. God is watching."
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.
A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples."
A teacher was telling his class about the time he saved a donkey from its abusive owner.
He asked if anyone knew why he did it.
A boy smiled and said "Brotherly love."
-The mark of a good fan fiction writer is when someone has read your work, but can't remember that it wasn't actually from the original. -Pessimism: Every Dark Cloud Has a Silver Lining, But Lightning Kills Hundreds of People Every Year Who Are Trying To Find It. -Where am I going, and why am I in this hand basket? -I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate. And I can picture us attacking that world because they'd never expect it.
"Real men take it up the ass... and real women like to watch it"
If: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z is represented as: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.
H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K 8118423151811 = 98 percent
K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E 11141523125475 = 96 percent
A-T-T-I -T-U-D-E 120209202145 = 100 percent
B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T 2211212198920 = 103 percent
AND, look how far ass kissing will take you.
A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G 1191911919199147 = 118 percent
"5 out of 4 people have trouble with fractions."
"667. Evil and then some."
"Always forgive your enemies, because nothing annoys them more."
"And to think, you're the end result of millions of years of evolution."
"A nuclear war can ruin your whole day."
"Are you a side effect of my medication?"
"Behold! The All-American weapon of mass destruction: choking on a pretzel."
"Boys are like pennies, two-faced and worthless."
"Chaos...Panic...Disorder...My work here is done."
"Come talk to me when you have some money."
"Come to the dark side; we have cookies."
"Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and good with ketchup."
"Don't drink and drive; you might spill your beer!"
"Don't interrupt me when I'm talking to myself."
"Don't tell me to watch my blood pressure. I have no blood!" '
"Eat right, exercise, die anyway."
"Fight Organized Crime: Abolish the IRS."
"For the record, I blame you."
"Gone to my happy place. Back soon."
"Goose a dragon and you're toast."
"Happiness is like wetting your pants. Other people can see it and only you can feel it."
"Have a nice day but leave me out of it."
"Here I am. Now what are your other two wishes?"
"I did NOT escape. They gave me a day pass."
"Idiocy is the essence of the male mind."
"I do whatever my Rice Krispies tell me to."
"I don't get mad, I get even."
"I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it!"
"If I die, I'm taking you with me! Oh...you're dying? Forget I said anything."
"If the opposite of 'pro' is 'con', what's the opposite of 'progress'?"
"If you don't like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk."
"If you want breakfast in bed, go sleep in the kitchen."
"If you wish not to be destroyed, you will leave me alone."
"I have a dream, and in it something eats you."
"I have no idea what I'm doing out of bed."
"I like it in my happy place, for they know me there."
"I'm an angel! I swear! The horns are just there to hold the halo in place!"
"I'm not littering, I'm donating to the earth."
"I'm only afraid of knives when you're holding them."
"I'm too tired to tell the truth."
"Instant Human: just add coffee."
"Is there a hyphen in obsessive-compulsive?"
"It's bad luck to be superstitious."
"It's the quiet ones you have to watch out for."
"I used up all my sick days, so I called in dead."
"I've said it once, butit's worth repeating. Anime: Crack is cheaper."
"I want to die peacefully in my sleep like grandfather...not screaming like the passengers in his car."
"Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand."
"Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard; be evil."
"Last night, as I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky, I thought, "Where the hell is my ceiling?"
Lincoln's Gettysburg address had 272 words. The Ten Commandments had 296 words. The U.S. Department of Agriculture setting the price of cabbage has 15,297 words."
"Manga: The Anti-Drug. Because when you're addicted to manga, how could you possibly afford drugs?!"
"Merry Christmas to all and to all shut the hell up."
"My homework ate my dog!"
"My life is too much for me to keep up with. I want my sippy cup back."
"My mind works like lightning...One brilliant flash and it's gone."
"No need to suffer in silence when you can still moan, whimper, and complain."
"NO TRESPASSING. Violators will be shot; survivors will be shot again."
"Nothing is fool-proof to a sufficiently talented fool."
"Of course I don't look busy; I did it right the first time."
"Of course I'm out of my mind!...It's dark and scary in there..."
"Of course violence isn't the answer. 'Violence' is the question and 'yes' is the answer!"
"Only in America do drive-in ATM's have Braille lettering."
"Only in America do pizzas arrive at doorsteps faster than ambulances."
"Only in America do they sell hot dogs in packs of ten and buns in packs of eight." (That's weird...The hotdogs I buy come in packs of seven...)
"Only in America is the slowest traffic time of the day referred to as 'rush hour'"
"Ow, my brain hurts."
"Please do not throw anything or anybody into the fish pond."
"Sarcasm is just one more service I offer."
"Self Destruct in 5. 4. 3. 2. 1. Have a nice day. (Explodes)"
"Silence is golden. Duct tape is silver."
"Smile. It confuses people."
"Sorry, mind closed until further notice."
"Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed."
"Sugar is good for you."
"Take one step closer and I'll run away."
"Tell me your sob story...I need a good laugh."
"That which doesn't kill you...Will probably try again."
"The ability to speak doesn't make you intelligent."
"The newscaster is the person who says 'Good evening' and then tells you why it's not."
"The stupider people think you are, the more surprised they are when you kill them."
"There is a fine line between insanity and stupidity. Feel free to cross it!"
"There's too much blood in my caffeine system!"
"They say I have A.D.H.D., but I just don't understa- oh look! A kitty!"
"They say the truth will set you free. Then why is it every time I tell the truth, I get sent to my room?"
"To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first, and call whatever you hit the target."
"When it comes to thought, some people stop at nothing."
"When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then sit back and let the world wonder how you did it."
"When life gives you lemons, throw them back in God's face and yell, 'Make your own damn lemonade!'"
"Why be difficult, when with just a little bit of effort, you can be impossible?"
"You can't spell slaughter without laughter."
"You cry, I'll cry. You laugh, I'll laugh. You fall out of a window, I'll laugh even harder."
"Your chances of getting struck by lightning increase if you stand under a tree, shake your fist up at the sky, and yell, 'Storms suck!'"
"Your participle is dangling."
"You're not paranoid if they really are out to get you."
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