Poll: Do you think I should do a Toko fanfic? Vote Now!
Author has written 8 stories for Alex Rider, Protector of the Small Quartet, Young Justice, Harry Potter, Icemark Chronicles, Doctor Who, James Bond, Avengers, and Sherlock.
I love Harry Potter, The Avengers, Avatar: the Last Airbender, Transformers, ALL Tamora Pierce Books, Alex Rider, and Young Justice. My favorite book of all time is Pride and Prejudice, by Jane Austen. My favorite kind of movie is a romantic comedy, but my favorite movie is the King's Speech. And my favorite painting is Starry Night. I love reading, and writing! Message me if you like anything I have done!
Eat. Sleep. FIRST. Write. Swim.
I love these quotes!!!! READ THEM ALL!!!
It's you and me versus the world...we attack at dawn.
Some people say "If you can't beat them, join them". I say "If you can't beat them, beat them", because they will be expecting you to join them, so you will have the element of surprise.
I don't get even, I get odder.
I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about their motives.
Normal people scare me...but not as much as I scare them.
Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you’re wrong.
I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous- everyone hasn't met me yet.
Heaven doesn't want me and hell is afraid I'll take over.
Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.
My knight in shining armor is on his way. He just took a wrong turn, got lost and is too stubborn to ask for directions.
They keep saying the right person will come along, I think mine got hit by a truck.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer.
Ask me no questions and I'll tell you no lies.
You can agree with me, or you can be wrong
I'm not good at empathy, will you settle for sarcasm?
You cry, I cry. You laugh, I laugh. You fall off a cliff, I laugh harder.
Laugh at your problems, everybody else does.
WE'RE NOT RETREATING! We're attacking in the other direction!
Hate is just a special kind of love we give to people who suck.
The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it’s still on the list.
Life’s disappointments are harder to take when you don’t know any swear words.
Some people are like slinkies. They seem to have no purpose, but they still bring you a smile when you push them down the stairs.
When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of 12 people who weren't smart enough to get out of Jury duty. (BE SCARED!)
When you wish upon a falling star, your dreams can come true. Unless it's actually a meteor hurtling toward Earth which will destroy all life. Then you're pretty much hosed no matter what you wish for. Unless it's death by meteor.
War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
If God is watching us, the least we could do is be entertaining.
God must love stupid people. He made SO many.
Jesus loves you, but everyone else thinks you're an asshole.
In the beginning the Universe was created. This made a lot of people very angry and has been widely regarded as a bad move.
The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.
A learning experience is one of those things that says, 'You know that thing you just did? Don't do that.'
The sole purpose of a child's middle name, is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.
Keep smiling; it makes people wonder what you're up to.
Flying is easy, you just throw yourself at the ground and miss.
Never argue with an idiot. They'll just drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.
If all else fails, destroy all evidence that you tried.
Never go to bed angry, stay awake and plot your revenge.
Some people come into our lives and leave footprints on our hearts, while others come into our lives and make us wanna leave footprints on their face.
Sarcasm helps keep you from telling people what you really think of them.
In order to lose your mind, you have to have one in the first place.
Love your enemies. It gets them really confused.
If you can't dazzle the world with your knowledge, baffle them with your B.S.
Some people are actually sane. Imagine how boring their life must be.
Gene Police: You! Out Of The Pool!
Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door.
The person who smiles when things go wrong has found someone to blame it on.
If you are talking behind my back, you are in a good position to kiss my a$$.
What are three words that are guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere? "Hold my purse."
God created man before woman because every masterpiece needs a rough draft.
Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult.
Well behaved women rarely make history.
Women may not hit harder, but they hit lower.
Good girls are bad girls that never get caught.
Writing isn't a career, it's more of a mental illness.
Writing is my life, so why do people keep saying I don't have one?
There are very few personal problems that cannot be solved by a suitable application of high explosives.
There's always a light at the end of the tunnel. Of course, it's usually an oncoming express train.
He who laughs last didn't get it.
Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain.
Never get into fights with ugly people, they have nothing to lose.
Sometimes people deserve a high five, in the face, with a chair.
Two wrongs don't make a right, but they make a good excuse.
Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.
Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups...
Even if the voices aren't real, they have some good ideas.
Silence is golden but duct tape is silver.
May the f=ma be with you.
Come to the Dork Side. We have Pi!
Duct Tape is like the force. It has a dark side, a light side, and it holds the world together.
There are three kinds of people. Those who learn by reading, a few who learn by observation, and the rest who have to test the electric fence for themselves.
An idiot is a 44th floor window washer who steps back to admire his work.
There are no stupid questions, just a lot of inquisitive idiots.
All people have the right to stupidity but some people abuse the privilege.
The trouble with life is there's no background music.
You know the speed of light, so what's the speed of dark?
Evening news is where they begin with 'Good evening', and then proceed to tell you why it isn't
I'm blond, so this makes me immune to hate mail from other blondes.
A red head, a brunette, and a blonde are being chased by the police. The red head hides behind a dog. The police ask "Is there anyone hiding behind this dog?" "Bark." she says. The brunette hides behind a cat. "Is there anyone hiding behind this cat?" the police ask. "Meow." she says. The blonde hides behind a sack of potatoes. "Is there anyone hiding behind this sack of potatoes?" The police ask. "PO-TAY-TO!!!!!!!!"
Hysterical quotes from Amazing Stories:
"Well, hello, Peter," said Professor Lupin pleasantly, as though rats frequently erupted into old school friends around him. "Long time, no see."
"What's a Huffle? And why is it puffy?"
A ball of blonde attacked Sirius Black, using what appeared to be her mouth as her weapon of choice.
If only girls didn't usually do things in pairs, then she wouldn't be able to pull this off. It's our fault really that boys now believe going to the bathroom for us is a team sport.
Hallee's head was quickly attacked by a shoe. Conveniently attached to Lily's hand.
John also began to curse Blunt, figuring Alex couldn't possibly know the amount of swear words in foreign languages that he did and, therefore, had left some out.
Ben sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose, "And in one of your Alex moments you decided that nothing could go wrong with finding a ruthless terrorist organization because your dying assassin friend told you to."
MI6 had obviously decided that making Alex Rider's life living hell was more fun than any of their other past times, and had put an extra-large amount of time into it this week.
"You two also decided that you should date," Alex pointed out, "Clearly you guys can't be trusted with decisions."
"'S not a penis substitute," slurs Tony, proving that, even when semi-conscious, his ability to pick out the least relevant part of any argument and attack it head-on remains unmatched.
She did the only thing any sane woman would do. She slapped him across the face.
"Because real villains don't Skype the good guys."
"Also, work it as if you're a Malibu barbie boll that just earned their first hot pink car."
And at that point, I did what any level headed, self-respecting witch would. I walked right up to her and punched her in the face.
"What if he doesn't want to marry me?" Ally rants as she dons her white dress, "What if he changes his mind and decides he wants to marry a barmaid with a gorgeous figure but a dark past that comes back to haunt her and he fights it for her and they overcome all the obstacles and she's broken but beautiful and healing slowly with him and she makes him feel better in ways I couldn't and they elope to India while I'm standing at the altar?"
If Sirius didn't look murderous, then Voldemort was a fluffy teddy bear.
"I have taught most of you and I simply need to say that while the majority of you were terrific and brilliant students," Dumbledore began, "you are absolutely terrible at organizing yourselves. I'll propose a new plan: I tell each of you where to stand, and you stand there."
"Oh okay, so I'm just going to assume that you're smiling because it's your angry face?" He asked.
"If you don't change back, then I shall be forced to assume that you're just a normal dog and not my wayward fiancé," she continued.
"Scorpia flings livestock at unsuspecting victims. Mystery solved. It's no wonder they're a feared organization."
Ben rolled his eyes, "I took a bullet, jumped out of a plane without a parachute, and posed as a belly dancer for the kid, why in the hell wouldn't I let him stay?"
"Conclusion...Bruce Wayne is like one of the coolest dads ever."
"This is Cub, reading you Mary-Poppins. I have moved through the village, secured transport, and am Oscar Mike now. ETA of about 30 minutes to target. Over."
"WE'RE NOT QUITE SURE ABOUT MARI, BUT WE KNOW SHE'S GOT SOME ISSUES TOO!"
"Milord. The portraits report that Professor Quirrell is having an argument with the back of his head, and is losing."
“At least I'm not an inbred Pureblood whose family tree is more twisted than a slinky!”
"Nope, we're saving that for the Third Task, imagine how cool the stuff in the maze would look after some pot,”
"How interesting. I shall remember to be guided through life by your unsolicited opinions."
"Mr. Who?" the very confused Scion of the Longbottom family asked.
"You can't just beat the shit out of everybody who annoys you! If I did that, Jersey Shore would start getting a lot more interesting."
Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list: AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Yavie Aelinel, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Shadow929, The Astrology Nerd, brown-eyed angelofmusic, piratesswriter/fairy to be, The Gypsy-Pirate Queen, watching-waiting-wishing, 100-percent-Harry-Potter-obsessed, iluvdavidwright45, dianeandnumairareahotcouple,windsoftiti, Ilovethelittletacos...Ilovethemgood, i-have-issues-deal-with-it, Kiba Obsessed Demonic Angel, Digital98, Anime-Kunoichi, Chinbaldo, Fox Heaven, Naruto Ninja44, 2hott4u, ororo.42, Poison's Ivy, Valkyrie Cain, waterbendergirl101, KiraraGlitter, Authoress-in-training, BloomandSky4ever, EzzBomb2010, DeidaraIsMine0deidara'sYLG0, 13th Panda and Inugirl Luna, SabertoothLioness, EmiStone
92 percent of the teenage population on all planets would die if Abecrombie and Fitch said that it wasn't cool to breathe anymore. If you're one of the 8 percent that would be laughing your bum off, put this on your profile.
These are suggestions for women responding to pick up lines...
Male: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put I and U togather
Male: If I could rearrange the keyboard, I'd put U and I next to each other
Male: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?
He says "Where have you been all my life"
Male: I would die for you...
Male: Hi. Didn’t we go on a date once? Or was it twice?
Male: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Male: "Is this seat empty?"
Male: "Hey, baby, What's your sign?"
Male:"Your body is like a temple."
Male: "I would go to the end of the world for you."
Male: "Your place or mine?"
Male: Do you believe in love at first sight or do you want me to walk by again?
Male: I'm addicted to yes, and I'm allergic to no. So what's it gonna be?
Male: "I can see forever in your eyes."
Male: '"I looked up beautiful in the thesaurus today and your name was included."
Male: Approaches/sits next to you/looks about to talk
Bad Things to Hear on an Airplane Intercom:
1. This is your captain speaking and I don't feel that life is worth living anymore.
2. We're cruising at an altitude of... Ah hell I don't know.
3. Could somebody come up here and tell me what this button does?
4. AHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Just kidding.
5. Would the fight attendant bring me a martini? And keep 'em comin'.
6. This is... uh... This is... uh... your... Hmm, I seem to have lost my memory...
7. Passengers on the left side of the plane -- does that engine sound funny to you?
8. Good God Steve! We’re going to crash! Oops -- is this intercom on?
9. We'll be on the ground in ten minutes. One way or another...
10. This is your captain speaking: I'm depressed, suicidal, and I'm taking you all with me. By the way, I've already killed the co-captain.
I OWE MY MOTHER
1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE. "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."
2. My mother taught me RELIGION. "You better pray that will come out of the carpet."
3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL. "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"
4. My mother taught me LOGIC. " Because I said so, that's why."
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC. "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT. "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."
7. My mother taught me IRONY. "Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS. "Shut your mouth and eat your supper."
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM. "Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER. "This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY. "If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE. "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION. "Stop acting like your father!"
15. My mother taught me about ENVY. " There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."
16 My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION. "Just wait until we get home."
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING. "You are going to get it when you get home!"
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE. "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way."
19. My mother taught me ESP. "Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"
20. My mother taught me HUMOR. "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me. "
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT. "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."
22. My mother taught me GENETICS. "You're just like your father."
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS. "Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"
24. My mother taught me WISDOM. "When you get to be my age, you'll understand."
And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE. "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you".
You Know You're an Author When:
MORE AMAZING QUOTES:
“I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.”
“Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition.”
"Those who criticize our generation forget who raised it."
"Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you."
"Be nice to nerds. Chances are you’ll end up working with one."
"When a subject becomes totally obsolete we make it a required course."
"Sorry, I’m allergic to bullshit."
"I can be your best friend or your worst enemy. You seem to prefer the latter."
"He's my brother." (Thor) "He killed 80 people in 2 days." (Black Widow) "He's adopted."
"M'gann, I would not be in a pear tree, I would be perched on top of a gargoyle."
"Let me tell you something. All boys are pathetic."
“Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt.”
“Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes.”
“The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter.”
“If women ran the world we wouldn’t have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days.”
"I had a teacher I liked who used to say good fiction's job was to comfort the disturbed and disturb the comfortable."
"When I was 5 years old, my mother always told me that happiness was the key to life. When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wrote down 'happy'. They told me I didn't understand the assignment, and I told them they didn't understand life."
Unsafe External Link