Author has written 10 stories for A Nightmare on Elm Street, Lord of the Rings, and Harry Potter.
Hello guys. So a little bit about me...I'm a Potterhead, for sure. I ship Dramione. I fangirl over Draco and Tom Felton. Don't judge. I'm really friendly when meeting new people and I will make you feel welcome. If you ever want to talk, I'm here. XXX.
I have a Tumblr and a Twitter account. If you wish to speak with me personally or privately, send me a message and I'll give you a link to one of my blogs. If you wish to contact me throught email, a link is shown below in bold.
If anyone wishes to have their story beta'd my email is
annemarieantunes (at) hotmail (dot) com
annemarieantunes (at) rocketmail (dot) com
I will accept Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings fanfic's to beta.
A girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle
Girl:Slow down, I'm scared!
Guy:No, this is fun.
Girl:No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.
Guy:Then tell me you love me.
Girl:I love you, now slow down!
Guy: Now give me a big hug.
She gives him a big hug
Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me.
In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of brake failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his brake wasn't working, but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she would live even if he died. Copy this into your profile if you would do this for someone you love.
Here are just some Copy and Paste stuff:
Here's 100 Random Questions:
1) Are you in a relationship with somebody?
2) Do you hate more than 3 people?
3) How many houses have you lived in?
4) Favorite candy bar?
5) Favorite shoes?
6) Have you ever tripped someone?
7) Least favorite school subject?
Art. So booring.
9) Do you own a Britney Spears CD?
10) Have you ever thrown up in public?
11) Name one thing that is always on your mind.
Draco Malfoy!!!!!!!!! And Tom Felton!!!!!!!
12) Favorite genre of music?
13) What is your zodiac sign?
14) What time were you born?
15) Do you like beer?
No no no no no no
16) Ever made a prank phone call?
17) What is the most embarrassing CD you own?
None of them...
18) Are you sarcastic?
19) What's your favorite color(s)?
21) Summer or winter?
23) Favorite color to wear?
24) Pepsi or Sprite?
20) How many watches do you own?
Uh...hold on, lemme check...5 but I never wear them.
25) What color is your cell phone?
26) Where is your second home?
27) Have you ever slapped someone?
Yes!!! And I felt proud of it!!!
28) Have you ever had a cavity?
29) How many lamps are in your bedroom?
30) How many video games do you own?
31) What was your first pet?
A doggie XD No...2 doggies!!!!!!
32) Ever had braces?
33) Do looks matter?
34) Do you use chapstick?
35) Name 3 teachers from your High School?
Im not in high school...yet.
36) American Eagle or Abercrombie?
37) Are you too forgiving?
38) How many children do you want?
Maybe 1-2 ish...I dunno
39) Do you own something from Hot Topic?
40) Favorite breakfast meal?
41) Do you own a gun?
Haha no...but I would like one to shoot down Jade Olivia...Mwahahaha...srry tht waz a bit rude
42) Ever thought you were in love?
43) When was the last time you cried?
Um...3 days ago?
44) What did you do 3 nights ago?
Dream about Tom Felton.
45) Olive Garden? La Panera?
I hav no idea.
46) Have you ever called your teacher mommy?
Yes...in grade 3.
47) Have you ever been in a castle?
Uhh...come to think of it...yes!!!
Oh...Anne, AnneMary, Annemaria.
49) Do you know anyone named Bertha?
50) Ever been to Kentucky?
51) Do you own something from Banana Republic?
52) Are you thinking about somebody right now?
53) Have you ever called someone Boo?
55) Do you own a diamond ring?
Aww, wish I did.
56) Are you happy with your life right now?
Eh, could get better.
57) Do you dye your hair?
58) Does anyone like you?
59) What year were you born?
60) What were you doing in May of 1994?
I was dead.
61) Do you own a Backstreet Boys CD?
62) McDonalds or Wendy's?
63) Do you like yourself?
What kind of question is that?!?!
64) Are you closer to your mother or father?
65) Favorite physical feature of the preferred gender?
66) Are you afraid of the dark?
No!!!! Well, maybe a teensy, weensy bit.
67) Have you ever eaten paste?
68) Do you own a webcam?
69) Have you ever stripped?
Holy butt, noooooo.
70) Ever broke a bone?
72) Do you chat on AIM often?
73) Pringles or Lays?
74) Have you ever broken someone's heart?
75) Rugrats or Doug?
I hav no idea wat tht is.
76) Full House or The Brady Bunch?
77) Did you like your high school guidance counsellor?
Who needs a guidance counsellor? I sure dont need guidance.
78) Has anyone ever called you fat?
I'm farrr frm fat.
79) Do you have a birth mark?
80) Do you own a car?
81) Can you cook?
If you count makin Nutella sandwiches then...
82) 3 things that annoy you:
Okaaay 1.My brothers
83) Do you text message often?
84) Money or love?
85) Do you have any scars?
86) What do you want more than anything right now?
Ohhhh hoho...Tom Felton, The Hobbit book, cast into the Harry Potter films (even though I hav no actin talent)...and the list goes on and on.
87) Do you enjoy scary movies?
88) Relationships or one night stands?
Wuts a one nite stand???
89) Big Red or Juicy Fruit?
90) Do you enjoy greasy food?
Not too greasy.
91) Have you seen all the Rocky movies?
92) Do you own a box of crayons?
94) Who was the last person that said they loved you?
I dont remember.
95) Who was the last person that made you mad?
96) Who was the last person that made you cry?
97) Who was the last person that made you laugh?
My best friend.
98) Who was the last person that you fell for?
99) Who was the last person that instant messaged you?
My best friend!!!
100) Who was the last person that called you?
My best friend!!!
Things To Say Randomly To Creep People Out:
"All hail the almighty dolphin!"
"IT'S BEHIND YOU! *point behind someone* THE THING FROM MY CLOSET!"
"I wonder if you could survive if you lived in a whale two weeks... We should find out!"
"I know what you did last night, and I'm not pleased."
"I think its time."
"I know. Really? You're kidding! That's impossible! Why? I get it. Wait, why did you just fly away?"
"Where did it go? I put it right there...*point at a random point in the sky* I know I put it right there..."
Last but certainly not least...
"YOU ARE ALL IN MY PERSONAL SPACE! *point to everyone anywhere near you* ITS BEING INVADED!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"
If you want to try any of those, post this on your profile!:)
20 Ways To Keep A Healthy Level Of Sanity:
1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.
4. When caught sleeping at school/work/wherever you are not supposed to be sleeping, and you are woken up, shout, "AMEN!"
5.Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.
6.When you drop a pen, don't pick it up. When someone reaches to pick it up for you, scream, "Wait! That's mine!!!"
7.Finish All Your sentences with 'In Accordance With The Prophecy'.
9. Skip down the hall Rather Than Walk and see how many looks you get.
10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
11.Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is 'To Go'.
12. Sing Along At The Opera.
14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and Play tropical Sounds All Day.
15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You have a headache.
17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream 'I Won! I Won!'
18. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Parking lot, Yelling 'Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!'
19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner,'Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.'
20. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity...
Copy and Paste this To Make People who read bios Smile.
Things To Do On An Elevator:
1) CRACK open your briefcase or handbag, peer Inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"
2) STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.
3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.
4) GREET everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.
5) MEOW occasionally.
6) STARE At another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM" - and back away slowly
7) SAY -DING at each floor.
8) SAY "I wonder what all these do?" And push all the red buttons.
9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10) STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on."
11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"
12) TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13) DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space."
14) WHEN there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.
15) PUSH the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
16) ASK if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.
17) HOLD the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"
18) DROP a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"
19) BRING a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
20) PRETEND you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the Passengers.
21) SWAT at flies that don't exist.
22) CALL out "Group hug" then enforce it.
23) Make race car noises when someone gets on or off.
24) Congratulate all for being in the same lift as you.
25) Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering, "Shut up, all of you just shup UP!"
26) Walk in with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
27) While the doors are opening, hurriedly whisper, "Hide it...quick!", then whistle innocently.
28) Let your cell phone ring--don't answer it.
29) Walk into the lift and say, "This reminds me of being buried alive. Ah, those were the days..."
30) Take shoes off before entering. Then look shocked and disgusted when others don't.
31) Ask people which floor they want, then say, "Is that your final answer?"
32) Also in your bellboy act, ask people what floor they want. Whenever they answer, give them a glare and say, "You should be ashamed of yourself!"
33) Ask loudly, "Did you feel that?"
34) Tell different people that you can see their aura.
35) When the door closes, announce to the others, "It's okay. Don't panic, they open up again."
36) Announce in a demonic voice, "I must find a more suitable host body."
37) Dress up in a long black cloak with a hood, stare at everyone, and in a deep voice announce: "It is time..."
38) Keep saying, "I wonder what this button does..." and randomly press a button. When the elevator stops on that floor, say, "LET'S DO IT AGAIN!" Then press all the buttons.
39) Inform everyone on the elevator that you have a cat named Dog.
40) Stand in the corner hissing at anyone who gets on.
If you are planning to do all or one of these things then copy and paste it!
16 THINGS IM GOING TO DO AT WAL-MART:
1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.
2. Set all the alarm clocks in Electronics to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone,
" 'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.
5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask,
"Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
9. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.
11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.
13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream..
"NO! NO! It's those voices again!"
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!
16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "pikachu, I choose you!"
Repost this if you laughed...
Or are planning to do any of these things.
Help spread the love of DRAMIONE around! Copy and Paste this onto your profile if you love the pairing DRAMIONE!
Copy and Paste this into your profile to join the Review Revolution; because everyone knows how much it sucks when you have 500 hits and 3 reviews...
And now for the RANDOMNESS that every profile page needs!
You Know You're a Book Addict If:
You can randomly open to a page and know exactly what's going on.
Read the book until 4 A.M., then get back up at 7 A.M. to continue reading.
You write FanFictions about the book.
You try to get all of your friends (and everyone else) to read your favorite books.
You accidentally call everyone by the character's names.
Everything reminds you of the book.
You quote random lines all the time.
You try to do things that the characters do, even though you know you can't.
You've gotten incredibly bored in class, and debated on doing something your favorite character can do to escape the class.
You have pictures of your favorite characters on your iPod.
You've got a book memorized.
You've read a book more than five times.
You've read a book with 400 pages in less than two days.
You've planned and prepared a siege on a writer's house because he/she killed a character you like.
You've plotted to murder a character and steal her boyfriend.
You hate it when someone calls your favorite character fictional.
You blatantly deny it when someone calls a character fictional.
You check your back every morning in the mirror to see if you've sprouted wings and can join the Flock.
Your idol is a character from a book.
List twelve of your favorite characters from your fandom, in no particular order. Then answer the questions about them.
Harry Potter version:
1. Draco Malfoy
2. Ronald Weasley
3. Hermione Granger
4. Belatrix Lestrange
5. Harry Potter
6. Luna Lovegood
7. Neville Longbottom
8. Ginny Weasley
9. Fred Weasley
10. George Weasley
11. Blaise Zabini
12. Severus Snape
1) Have you ever read a Six/Eleven fic? Do you want to?
Uhh, no I havent.and i would like to.
2) Do you think Four is hot? How hot?
Belatrix? I like her style in clothes XD
3) What would happen if Twelve got Eight pregnant?
Snape got Ginny pregnant? I dont even wanna go there.
4) Can you recall any fics about Nine?
5) Would Two and Six make a good couple?
Ron and Luna? I guess so.
6) Five/Nine or Five/Ten? Why?
Harry/Fred or Harry/George...neither.
7) What would happen if Seven walked in on Two and Twelve kissing?
Neville walked in on Ron and Snape kissing? Lol.
8) Is there any such thing as One/Eight fluff?
Draco/Ginny?!?!?!?! No way! Dramione all the way.
9) Suggest a title for Seven/Twelve hurt/comfort fic.
10) Does anyone on your friends list consider Three hot?
Hermione...not tht i kno of.
11) Do any of your friends write or draw Eleven?
12) Would anyone on your friends list write Two/Four/Five?
Ron/Belatrix/Harry? Uhh no.
13) If you wrote a Song-fic about Eight, what song would you choose?
Ginny. Im not a big fan of song fics.
14) If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve fic, what would the warning be?
15) When was the last time you read a fic about Five?
Harry? Uhh not too long ago.
16) (1) and (7) are in a happy relationship until (7) dumps (1) for (9). (1), brokenhearted, goes on one date with (11), has an unhappy breakup with (12), then follows the wise advice of (5) and finds true love with (3).
Draco and Neville are in a happy relationship until Neville dumps Draco for Fred. Draco, brokenhearted, goes on a date with Blaise, has an unhappy breakup with Snape, then follows the wise advice of Harry and finds true loves with Hermione. Awwwww...Dramione forevaaaa.
17) What title would you give this fic?
If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile.
If you hate homework, join the club and copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vice versa copy this into your profile.
If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile.
If you like filling your profile with 'copy this into your profile' thingys, then COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!!
If you ever wondered who made up all the 'copy this into your profile' thingies then COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!
If you like chocolate as much as I do, copy this in your profile
If your one of those people who can literally stay on the computer for hours on end, if only you weren't forced to get off, then copy and paste this on your profile..
46 Ways To Annoy a Non-Harry Potter Fan:
1) Relate everything they say to the Harry Potter books or movies.
2) Crowd their in box with Harry Potter related emails, make the subject misleading.
3) Give them Harry Potter merchandise for their b-day and demand they cherish it 4-ever.
4) Pretend you can do magic.
5) Yell "CRUCIO" whenever they insult Harry Potter.
6) If your late for something blame it on your broken time turner.
7) Sort every person you meet in to one of the four houses.
8) Say "Lumos" every time you turn on a light.
9) If your asked to retrieve something shout "Accio" loudly.
10) Refuse to wash your hair and explain you're going for the Snape look.
11) Spend hours at a time trying to make your broom fly.
12) Tap all brick walls you encounter with an umbrella.
13) Demand to know what exactly the function of a rubber duck is.
14) Carry around a hip flask and refuse to drink anything anyone else offers you.
15) Hum the Harry Potter theme all day long.
16) Talk to animals and insist that they're animagi.
17) Walk up to random people and ask if their initials are R.A.B.
18) Tell them that they're almost as smart as Grawp.
19) Refuse to tell them who Grawp is.
20) Whenever it gets foggy outside scream "The Dementors are coming!" and hide for days at a time.
21) Point at modern electronic devices and say "Look at that! The things these muggles come up with!"
22) Point and grunt and insist that your speaking troll.
23) Take them to a CD store and make them look for the new Weird Sisters Album.
24) Always speak with a British accent, especially if your not from the U.K.
25) Draw round glasses and a lightening bolt scar on every poster you come across.
26) Constantly compare them to Mrs. Figg.
27) Laugh evilly if they ask who Mrs. Figg is.
28) Complain loudly about how your pictures don't move.
29) Break any awkward silences by saying "How 'bout them Chudley Canons."
30) Say "Alhomora" every time you open a door.
31) Every time you see them demand an explanation of why they don't like harry potter.
32) Say everything in a sing-song voice like Luna Lovegood.
33) Shriek loudly and say that you're speaking Mermish.
34) If they ask you about the weather solemnly say, "Mars is bright tonight."
35) Pretend your under an invisibility cloak and shout "You can't see me!"
36) Knit them a maroon jumper every year, especially if maroon isn't there color.
37) Draw the sign of the Hallow on every surface in the house.
38) While playing chess with them, stare at your pieces and give them verbal commands.
39) Throw the chess board across the room when the pieces don't move.
40) When one of the movies is on TV remind them every five minutes.
41) Refer to random people as "You-Know-Who."
42) Start swatting at the air saying there's a wrackspurt around.
43) Ask them to help you stuy for your O.W.L.'S
44) Walk around bumping into walls explaining your looking for the Room of Requirement.
45) Run up to random men with long dark hair and scream "SIRIUS! I always knew you were alive!"
46) Tell them that You-Know-Who was defeated today. When they ask who's you-know-who pretend to be offended and don't tell them who he is.
You say Twlilight
I say Harry Potter
You say Vampires
I say Wizards
You say Jacob Black
I say Sirius Black
You say Team Edward
I say Team Potter
You say Robert Pattison
I'll say 'Is Cedric Diggory'
You say Pattison is hot
I'll say Tom Felton is HOTTER
You think Bella and Edward are the Perfect dream couple?
I think thats Ron and Hermione are the Perfect dream couple
You say Edward
I'll say "Harry, now shut Up!"
Copy/Paste this if you agree that Twilight is nothing compared with HP and it's magical glory
In Remembrance to Severus Snape,
A Slytherin who died like a Gryffindor,
In Remembrance to Fred Weasley,
Who fought bravely to the very end,
And whose jokes will forever brighten his other half,
And will loyally await his soul mate and brother,
With many jokes,
He's got forever to think of them, right?
In Remembrance to Dobby,
Who was more free and full of love,
Than any elf, and most humans.
In Remembrance to Remus J. Lupin,
The last real Marauder,
Who was not just a wonderful father,
An incredible husband and a brave hero,
As well as an awesome warewolf,
In Remembrance to Nymphadora Tonks,
Who died for the greater good,
And would probably hex me for calling her Nymphadora,
In Remembrance to Alastair 'Mad Eye' Moody,
Who's motto 'Constance Vigilance' kept him alive,
In Remembrance to Tom Marvolo Riddle, A.K.A Voldemort,
Who was pretty cool and cute when he was younger,
But who got his ass kicked thoroughly in the end,
In Remembrance to Albus Dumbledore,
Whose past and wisdom confused us,
Whose seeming betrayal shocked us,
But who actually turned out to be an okay guy in the end,
In Remembrance to Bellatrix Lestrange,
Because it was awesome how Molly Weasley got her with the Avada Kedavra,
She deserved everything she got in the end,
In Remembrance to Colin Creevey,
Who we really didn't know too well,
But took a lot of pictures and died fighting in the war,
So he must've done something good...
Besides stalking Harry,
In Remembrance to Hedwig,
Harry's first real friend,
Who lived and died soaring.
The Harry Potter Pledge:
If I get a facial scar,
I'll think of Harry P
And if my brothers take all control
I'll think of Ron Weasley
If my hair is like a bush
I'll think Hermione G
Or if I feel too overworked
I'll think of poor Dobby
And if I feel just like a snoot
I'm Draco M that day
If I am simply just a hoot
I'm Hedwig all the way
If I feel way too wise and old
I'll think of Dumbledore
Or I'll be dear old Neville L
Any time I snore
I'll think of Hagrid every time
The food is just too bad
And Voldemort will fill my mind
Whenever I am mad
My blood will run gold every time
That I am truly brave
Or I'll be a Marauder
When I simply can't behave
Sevy Snape will be my guy
When love is complicated
And I'm Delores Umbridge
When I am simply hated
Hogwarts is my only home
Until I'm cold and dead
And when I put down one of the books
It won't be left unread
I pledge my life to Harry P
And the magic world around
Cuz JKR has touched my life
And to Harry James Potter, I am bound
If you pretend Fred Weasley didn't die, copy and paste this into your profile
If you secretly hoped to get a letter from Hogwarts when you were 11, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you're in denial over Tonks and Remus' death's copy and paste this into your profile.
If you wish you went to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, then copy and paste this into your profile and add your name to the list with your house of choice:
FiyeroTiggular93 - Slytherin,
Weirder Than You - Ravenclaw,
Summer Sweetheart - Hufflepuff,
AngeliqueChanson-Slytherin(all the way!),
Raven Darkholme-slytherin(yah baby!),
Kichi Rin no Akatsuki - Slytherin (Slytherin Pride!),
PadfootThe2nd (I'm a Lion for life! GRYFFINDOR!),
Poppy Quinn-Gryffindor or Ravenclaw,
ohsnapitzJess - Slytherin,
voldyismyfather - slytherin
DestinedforGreatness- Slytherin for the win!,
IwannabeAnnabeth-Ravenclaw all the way!,
The Epic Thunder Ravenclaw (only the smartest know that Z comes before A in the letter circle ;))
Meh111 Slytherin Pride!
anne-lotr-hp-slytherin all the way XD XD
The Hogwarts Rules:
1. No matter how good a fake Australian accent I can do, I will not imitate Steve Irwin during Care of Magical Creatures class.
2. I will not use Umbridge's quill to write, "I told you I was hardcore".
3. If a classmate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of that fact and draw a Dark Mark on their arm.
4. Seamus Finnegan is not "after me Lucky Charms".
5. I will not ask Lupin if it his time of the month.
6. I am not allowed to steal Professor Flitwicks wand, hold it over my head and laugh as he tries to reach it.
7. Asking "How do you keep a Gryffindor in suspense?" and walking away is only funny the first time.
8. I will not offer to pose nude for Colin Creevey.
9. Professor Flitwick's first name in not Yoda.
10. I will not refer to the hippogriff as "Horsey bird".
11. Crucifixes do not ward off Slytherins, and I should not test that.
12. Professor Snape does not enjoy being called "Snookums".
13. -Neither does he respond favourably to "Sev", "Snapey-Poo" or "Debbie".
14. Dumbledore is not Santa, he does not wish for me to sit on his knee and demand presents, especially not in June.
15. I will not greet Professor McGonagall with "What's new, pussycat?"
16. I will not refer to "The Grim" as a nice doggy.
17. - I will not refer to Professor Lupin as a nice doggy.
18. There is no bring a muggle to school day.
19. When applying for a post at the Ministry of Magic after graduation, I should not cite "Fred and George Weasley" as my greatest influence at Hogwarts."
20. - "Putting down Lord Voldemort" is probably not best either.
21. I will not refer to the Accio charm as "The Force".
22. I will not sing "Defying Gravity" during Quidditch practice.
23. There is no connection between Hitler and Voldemort.
24. I am not allowed to declare "Official Hug A Slytherin Day."
25. I am not to wear my DEATH EATER AND PROUD OF IT! shirt to school.
26. When in the presence of the Dark Lord, I must call him The Dark Lord. Not 'Snake-Face, the Dark Lord Happy Pants'.
27. I am not allowed to ask any of the Malfoys if it's "true that blondes have more fun"
28. I am not to sing 'We're off to see the wizard, the wonderful wizard of Oz!' when sent to the Headmaster's office'.
29. I am not to hold my wand in the air before casting spells and shout 'I... GOT... THE... POWER!'
30. When Death Eaters are attacking Hogsmede, I shall not point at the Dark Mark and shout 'To the Batmobile, Robin!'
31. - Or 'Thunder, Thunder, Thunder, THUNDERCATS, GO!'
32. I am not Voldemort's illegitimate love child.
33. If the thought of a spell makes me giggle for longer than 15 seconds, I am to assume that I am not allowed to do it.
34. I do not have a Cyberman Patronus.
35. Calling the Ghostbusters is a cruel joke to play on the resident ghosts and poltergeists.
36. Taking red paint and writing creepy messages on the walls is not funny, either.
37. I will not use Slytherin and Gryffindor first years as Christmas decorations.
38. Using the Engorgio charm on certain parts of the human anatomy is not permitted on the school grounds, not even for entertainment purposes.
39. It is generally accepted that Cats and Dragons cannot interbreed and I should not attempt to disprove this theory, no matter how wicked the result would be.
40. I will not write all my essays in red ink claiming it is blood.
41. It's not tasteful to approach Cho wearing a T-shirt that says 'All the good-looking ones die young' with a picture of Cedric Diggory on it.
43. I will not write forged letters home to the parents of Muggleborn first years detailing the Satanic rituals they are learning.
44. Locking Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter in a broom cupboard together to see if hot gay sex will occur is not appropriate.
45. The four houses are not the Morons, the Borons, the Smartasses and the Junior Death Eaters.
46. Teaching first years to chorus in unison 'The amazing bouncing ferret' whenever they hear the name Draco Malfoy is just wrong, funny, but wrong.
47. No matter what I say to the Dark Lord, I will never make him laugh.
48. Murmuring 'I see dead people' every time I see one of the ghosts is stupid and was never funny.
49. I will not replace Professor Snape's Pumpkin Juice with Skele-Gro, and it was not an honest mistake.
50. I am not funny. No matter how much I make myself laugh.
If you’re in love with a fictional character copy and paste this in your profile.
If you wish you could just pop in and out of your favorite stories, changing the storyline as you go along to fit your own agenda, copy and paste this into your profile
Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile
If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer
If you actually enjoy reading, copy this into your profile.
If you are of the opinion that everyone is entitled to their own opinion, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever read something and got sucked into that book, copy this into your profile.
If you enjoy books about dragons, copy this into your profile.
If you enjoy fantasy in general, copy this into your profile.
If you wish that fictional characters were real, copy and paste this to your profile.
- Don't suffer from insanity: enjoy every moment of it!
-Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
-You're obsessed and crazy? We obviously haven't been introduced properly.
-Don't hate people who make mistakes. Hate the people who make them, and never learn.
-When there's a halo, there's a pair of devil horns keeping it straight.
-Remember, there's nothing better than a best friend, unless that best friend has chocolate.
-Please leave your shoes and sanity at the door.
-Children, where there is a will, you want to be in it.
-Don't walk in my footsteps. I tend to walk into the occasional wall, off the odd cliff and countless times into various patio doors.
-If you're running from zombies, nobody will blame you if you trip up the odd person, whether it's your mum or not.
-Never knock on death's door. Ring the bell and run! Death hates that.
-If at first you don't succeed, never try sky- diving.
-If Heaven doesn't want you and Hell is afraid you'll take over, stay on middle ground.
-Nothing is impossible, unless you count slamming a revolving door.
-If it wasn't for physics, law enforcment, my mum and my curfew, I'd be unstoppable.
-When you're going to take over the world, make sure nothing sparkly is in your way. They can distr- ohh, glitter!
-If a computer beats you at chess, remember that they're rubbish kick-boxers.
-If you tickle me, I may laugh but I'm really thinking if you want to live until Christmas.
-Always refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed opponent.
-An idiot is a window washer on the 44th floor who steps back to admire his work. -Sure, I'd like to help you out. Which way did you come in?
-Logic is a systematic method of coming to the wrong conclusion with confidence.
-A conclusion is the part where you got tired of thinking.
Some examples of why the human race has probably evolved as far as possible. These are actual instruction labels on consumer goods..
On Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
(Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)
On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special!)
On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
(What if you don't know how?)
On some Swann frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
(But it's 'just' a suggestion!)
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
Do not turn upside down.
(a little too late, huh?)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
(Really? Are you sure?)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
(But wouldn't that save more time?)
On artificial bacon:
"Real artificial bacon bits".
(because they don't want to give us the fake bacon, they want to give us the real fake bacon :P)
On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.
(We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)
On Nytol sleep aid:
Warning: may cause drowsiness.
(One would hope!)
On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: keep out of children.
(I think something got lost in the translation)
On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
(As opposed to use on Mars?)
On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
(Now I'm curious)
On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: contains nuts.
(No duh Sherlock)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
(somebody got paid big bucks to write this one...)
On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
(Was that a popular problem...?)
On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
(Oh go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief.)
Warning: Keep Away From Children
(How are they supposed to get the medicine?)
Candle: Warning: A burning candle is fire
(WOW! I'm amazed and enlightened!)
Frozen Pizza: Warning: Do not eat before cooking
(So... You first.)
Blanket from Taiwan: Warning: Not To Be Used As Protection From A Tornado
Frisbee: Warning: May Contain Small Parts
(Um... How? I always thought frisbees were just one little disc...)
Railroad Sign: Warning: Beware! To touch these wires is instant death. Anyone found doing so will be prosecuted.
(Wouldn't they be already dead?)
Hair Coloring: Warning: Do not use as an ice cream topping
(Yummy! Hair dye!)
Puzzle: Warning: Some Assembly Required
(Well darn, I was planning on just enchanting the picture!)
If you realize that copying and pasting things into your profile is pointless, yet you do it anyways, copy and paste this into your profile.
If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile
If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.
There's a light at the end of every tunnel...lets just hope it's not a train.
When you get caught looking at him, just remember, he was looking back!
I dream of a better world where chickens can cross the road without having their motives questioned.
I used up all my sick days...so I called in dead.
Real girls aren't perfect, perfect girls aren't real. You want a perfect girl? Go buy a Barbie
When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep - not screaming, like the passengers in his car.
I smile because I have no idea what's going on!
One day, your prince will come. Mine? Oh, he just took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions.
One day, we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject.
Don't knock on death's door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that.
Whoever said nothing was impossible never tried slamming a revolving door...
Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.
Of course I'm out of my mind! It's dark and scary in there!
When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
People are like slinkies; basically useless, but ever so amusing to watch fall down the stairs.
If you can't convince them, confuse them.
An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed.
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving isn't for you.
What happens if you get scared half to death... twice?
Never do anything that you wouldn't want to explain to the paramedics.
The dinosaurs extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came and they all committed suicide.
I run with scissors, it makes me feel dangerous.
I had amnesia once--or twice. You know what? I don't really even remember.
Life isn't trying to pass me by, it's trying to run me over
When it rains on my parade, I bust out the slip 'n slide
They say 'guns don't kill people, people kill people.' well, I think that the gun helps. you wouldn't kill too many people standing there yelling 'BANG!'
Flying is simple: just throw yourself at the ground and miss
When someone is getting on your nerves, it takes 42 muscles to frown, 17 to smile, but only 4 muscles are needed to extend your arm and beat the crap out of them
Nobody's worth your tears, and the ones that are won't make you cry
Everyday is a gift, that's why its called the present
I have the answer in my head, I just haven't found it yet
Life is not measured in the breaths we take but in the moments that take our breath away
Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film
The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese
Behind every damsel is a fire breathing dragon
Don't talk unless you can improve the silence
I'm a nobody, nobody's perfect, therefore I'm perfect
Stupidity killed the cat. curiosity got framed
Some of the most wonderful, dazzling successes are going to happen to some of the most awful, undeserving people you know - people who are, in other words, not you
1. YOUR REAL NAME:
2. YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (first 4 letters of real name izzle)
3. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color and favorite animal)
4. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (your middle name and the street you live on)
5. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name)
6. YOUR SUPERHERO NAME:(Your 2nd favorite color, and favorite soda)
7. YOUR IRAQI NAME: (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, any letter of your middle name, 2nd letter of your mom's maiden name, 3rd letter of dad's middle name, 1st letter of a sibling's first name, and last letter of your mom's middle name)
8. YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME:(both parents' middle names)
9. YOUR GOTH NAME: (Black and the name of one of your pets)
Black...i dont hav a pet :(
10. Your cow name: (put the first 4 letters of your name in, then moo)
11. Your parrot name: (put the first 2 letters of your name in, then birdy)
12. Your fake name: (put the last 3 letters of your last name in, the closest letter of the middle of your middle name, then the first 2 letters of your first name in)
13. Your poptropica name: (put your favorite color in, then your favorite thing in outerspace that you can see at night)
14. Your Pokemon name (Your favorite color then your month of birth . color first name month last name.)
Pick the month you were born:
April- I Licked
May—I did the Macarena with
July—I jumped on
August-I had lunch with
September-I danced with
October-I sang to
November-I yelled at
December-I ran over
Pick the day (number) you were born on:
7-my mobile phone
9-my best friends' boyfriend
11-my science teacher
14-a stuffed animal
19- - a smurf
20-a baseball bat
25-a football player
31-A homeless guy
Pick your second favourite colour.
White-because I'm cool like that
Black-because that's how I roll.
Pink-because I'm crazy.
Red-because the voices told me to.
Blue-because I'm sexy and I do what I want
Green-because I think I need some serious help.
Purple-because I'm AWESOME!
Gray-because Big Bird said to and he's my leader
Yellow-because someone offered me 1,000,000 dollars
Orange-because my family thinks I'm stupid anyway
Brown-because I can..
Other-because I'm a Ninja!
None-because I can't control myself!
Combine and see what you get!
I sang to my best friends boyfriend because Im crazy.
If you quote along with your favourite shows and love doing that, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you had ever gotten writer's block in a sudden and random moment, copy this to your profile.
List twelve of your favourite characters (Lord of the Rings)
1. Have you ever read a 7/2 fic?Do you want to?
Boromir and Pippin? I have not read one but there might be one or two.
2. Do you think 4 is hot? How hot?
Frodo? yeah he is kinda cute.
3. What would happen if 10 got 5 pregnant?
Saruman got Arwen pregnant? Arwen and Aragorn Would KILL him.
4. Can you recall any fics about 7?
Boromir? Yes there are a few.
5. Would 11 and 3 make a good couple?
Sauron and Merry? ARE YOU CRAZY?!?!?!?!
6. 6/2 or 6/3? Why?
Gandalf and Pippin or Gandalf and Merry? Neither.
7. What would happen if 9 walked in on 2 and 8 having sex?
Aragorn walked in on Sam and Pippin having sex? He would back away and pretend he never saw anything.
8. Make up a summary for a 12/6 fic.
Gimili and Gandalf? I have no idea.
9. Is there any such thing as 8/3 fluff?
Sam and Merry? I don't think so.
10. Suggest a title for a 4/11 hurt/comfort fic.
Frodo and Sauron? THERE IS NO COMFORT THERE!!!!!
11. What kind of plot would you use if you wanted 8 to deflower 2?
Sam to Pippin? I am pretty sure that would not happen.
12. Does anyone on your friends list read 7 het?
Boromir? I am not sure.
13. Does anyone on your friends list write or draw 6?
Gandalf? I am not sure about this either.
14. Would anyone on your friends list write 5/8/1?
15. What might 8 scream at a moment of great passion?
16. If you wrote a Song-fic about 6, what song would you choose?
Gandalf? I have no idea
17. If you wrote a 1/8/4 fic, what would the warning be?
Legolas/Sam/Frodo Warning: There will be orc death.
18. What might be a good pick up line for 11 to use on 6?
Sauron to use on Gandalf? That thought just scared me.
19. When was the last time you read a fic about 9?
Aragorn? Not to long ago.
20. Would 1 shag 3? Drunk or sober?
Legolas and Merry? Definitaly drunk
21. If 4 and 12 get together, who tops?
Gimili and Frodo got together? That would be wierd.
22. "(11) and (2) are in a happy relationship until (2) runs off with (10). (11), brokenhearted, has a hot one-night stand with (4) and a brief unhappy affair with (9), then follows the wise advice of (7) and finds true love with (5)."
Sauron and Pippin are in a happy realtionship untill pippin runs of with saruman. Sauron, brokenhearted, has a hot one night stand with Frodo and a breif unhappy affair with Aragorn, then followes the wise advice of Boromir and finds his true love with Arwen.
Four words for you, Sauron: Aragorn's gonna kill you!
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