Author has written 14 stories for Matrix, 28 Days Later, LXG, Legacy of Kain, Dawn of the Dead, Saw, Star Wars, Fantastic 4, Underworld, Avatar: Last Airbender, and Harry Potter.
So I decided to redo my bio!
Hi, I'm MorningHell. I enjoy writing suspense, drama, adventure, romance, humor, and hey, what the hell, I like to do slash too. Why? What, you want me to get preachy or something? I'm not afraid to admit it--the same reason men like watching two women get it on. I make no attempt to deny my cave-woman instincts. One man good. Two man better. I am sinful, perverted, immoral, imature, dirty, condemned soul who is very much going to hell. But I'm going to hell for oh-so many other reasons, so it would be a shame not to indulge myself in everything. In all seriousness, sexual attraction isn't the focal source of my writing. I mean hey, see a couple, try and make it work. I'll gladly write some lesbian action if the circumstance strikes me as fun or interesting. But you know...good old hetero can be fancy too.
Suspense gives me a kick. I love to try and hang people on edge. Drama is all around enjoyable. Sometimes a good story just has to end sad. Adventure is fun by definition, as is humor. There are points in my muddled and encumbered existence wherein I may drop fics, and I apologize for that. I do make serious strives to finish things. On that note, it's also rather rare that you might see more than one fic in each section from me. Often I just wait until an idea hits me from something I've watched, clack out a story, drop her off, and be on my way to the next fandom. I hope the variety in my little library is more refreshing than it is...Attention Deficit Disorder.
I love my reviewers dearly. Whether you're telling me you love it and want more, or you're telling me you hate it beyond all reason, or you just leave a review that says "Oh my God you suck please die and go to hell", you took the time, and that is a battle against a lazy fat generation! ...Or something. If you're just reading and enjoying but you don't review--I'm sorry, but I don't love you. I just like you a whole lot. So we could never be more than friends, and I hope you understand.
And now, I present to you (although they are in no particular order save number 1) the top 10 pet peeves of mine in regards to fanfiction summaries:
The Arbitrary OK- "Ok, so a new student comes to Hogwarts, blah blah blah," Do we need the ok? Really, it sounds like a bad pitch, doesn't it?
Punctuation and Grammar Kaput- That's no way to sell your story...I mean come on, your summary is technically the first part of your story that the public will read, do you want to portray it as some barely coherent jumble of plz/k/wtf/thnx's? If you don't take the time to punch up your summary, no one's going to take the time to read it, which means no one reads your story and no one reviews.
A Fiction Hostage Situation- "I will only continue this story if I get five reviews." Okay...if you have to blackmail people into reading your work, how good can it be? I can understand having no desire to continue a story that no one is reading every now and then, but if you need the attention just to progress, you're probably writing for the wrong reasons. Granted, you see this in author's notes more than you do summaries, but it's a peeve nonetheless.
Attack of the Pairing Abreviations- I know, I know, using abreviations saves space in an egregiously limited caption, but when I stumble across a summary laced with a strand of initials, it irks me. "Mainly a J/K but I threw in some DM/HG and Sasunaru with the possibility of some future Mi/Mo." Can't anything be a surprise? Do we have to know every couple going into a story? Personally I like a little mystery sometimes. And if you have to scrawl out a list of pairings, that's just taking up space you could be using to concoct something intruguing to say about your story's PLOT.
Something About Mary...Sue - CLEAR Mary Sue summaries. Alright, if you think you're story might be a Mary Sue, why would you advertise it with a blatantly crafted warning? It's like trying to sell a car after you've already described how the transmission's falling out. You know what word I hate the most in these scenarios? The word "mysterious". Oh god, how many times do I have to hear, "When a mysterious girl shows up at..." or "When a girl with mysterious powers..." And oh, some summaries actually flat out SAY "Somewhat of a Mary Sue"...that's like saying your soup is "somewhat frozen". If it's somewhat frozen, you don't even want to try and eat it period.
The 'Talk About Me' Syndrome - You have so little room in your summary...WHY would you fill it up with, "So I was sitting in my room eating potato chips last night when I decided to write a story..." People don't care about you. They care about an interesting story, which they aren't going to read if they dread the two pages of journal-like drabble awaiting them. The same goes for those damn chat conversations at the beginning of stories between either the author and the characters about to be written or just two friends who perhaps collaborated on the work...it's just asanine and people really don't care about something they're not 'in on'.
"Full Summary Inside" - I just plain don't get this one. If you can't make an interesting case for yourself in the allotted space, how creative can you really be? And how can you expect people to expend any more effort for your story than they would for the ones they can just scroll down and read without clicking and waiting for another page to load? Some people have very slow connections, after all.
The Cutof-- - I hate seeing otherwise good summaries cut off in the middle of a word. I always check my summaries to make sure they're the right length to avoid looking stupid...It's more for the author's benefit than the reader, if you ask me.
Twenty Questions - I hate summaries that are comprised of a thousand tiny questions. Now don't get me wrong, I don't mean all summaries built from questions are bad (good example: "Is there another madman out for Professor Xavier's head? Why is Wolverine considering abandoning the Institute for good? And is Jean really gone forever, or was it all some elaborate hoax?") Not that I think an all-question summary is the best way to go, but it's not that bad. It's when they're unrelated, too short, and too ambiguous to offer a lucid plotline. (bad example: "What happened to Obi Wan Kenobi? Who's chasing them? Why? Is there a way out of their trap? Find out.") ...Wuh?
--And my number 1, absolute, ultimate pet peeve when it comes to summaries is:--
"I suck at summaries" - Why? Just...why? What's the point of saying this? If your summary is bad, we can see that it's bad. But instead of trying to improve it with the space you've got, you cheat yourself out of room by trying to give yourself an excuse for being too lazy to construct a good hook. Saying that has nothing to do with your story and does nothing to interest people into reading what you've written. All we think is, "If you can't write even a little summary about this thing, how could it be any good itself?" It's like writing, "Sorry, I suck at writing" before your story. I was under the impression that we're trying to sell our writing to the audience--like movie makers do with movies. They want to present a badass trailer that makes the movie look cool, not a "please see my movie!" trailer.
Oi! And these people wonder why they get no reviews! It's not because they're writing sucks--it's the dreaded, lazy, cliche summary.
And now, a rampant--but dire--note to all authors and those with fingers capable of typing any form of english speech.
"NO ONE" IS NOT ONE WORD. IT HAS NEVER BEEN AND WILL NEVER BE ONE WORD. THE WORDS ARE EITHER "NO ONE" OR "NOON", AND THEY DO NOT MEAN THE SAME THING. THERE IS NO "NOONE". THERE IS NO "NOONE".
Thank you, that is all.