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Joined 11-15-11, id: 3431995, Profile Updated: 05-26-12
Author has written 7 stories for 39 Clues.

You Know You're a Book Addict If:

You can randomly open to a page and know exactly what's going on. This is so me

Read the book until 4 A.M., then get back up at 7 to continue reading. I stay up till midnight, actually. Then I turn off the lights AND continue reading.

You write fan fictions about the book. Uhh, duh.
You try to get all of your friends (and everyone else) to read your favorite books. You don't wanna know

You accidentally call everyone by the character's names. I PURPOSELY call them Janus Face. Does that count?

Everything reminds you of the book. You, know me. Should I be worried?
You quote random lines all the time. Random and sarcastic :)

You've gotten incredibly bored in class, and debated on doing something your favorite character can do to escape the class. It was'nt me! It was Dan's fault!
You have pictures of your favorite characters on your iPod. The Lucian Crest is my wallpaper.

You've got a book memorized. Five minutes before she died, Grace Cahill changed her will.
You've read a book more than five times. DUUH. My favourite little red book. Aka the sword thief.

You've read a book with 400 pages in less than two days. Totally.

You've planned and prepared a siege on a writer's house because he/she killed a character you like. RILEY CLIFFORD YOU ARE DEAD

You hate it when someone calls your favorite character fictional. The person better run away before I pull out a Lucian object. *evil laugh*
You blatantly deny it when someone calls a character fictional. Amy and Ian exist! Do not argue! Do you want me to go all lucian on you? No? So shut up and get out of my sight NOW!

Your idol is a character from a book. Amy, Amy Amy

Calling me FAKE won't make you REAL

Calling me DUMB won't make you SMART

Calling me WEAK won't make you REAL

Calling me UGLY won't make you BEAUTIFUL

Got a problem with me? Solve it.

Can't stand me? Sit down.

Can't face me? Turn around.

Don't like my style? Well I certainly don't like yours.

Don't know me? Don't judge me.

Think you know me? Well you have NO idea.

Im me. Hate it? So cry me a river, build a bridge and WALK OVER IT.

My Mother...

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of
next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the
store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck?"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't
have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE.

"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

A good or best friend.

A good friend will be there for you when he breaks up with you. A best friend will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..." or "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"

A good friend helps you up when you fall. A best friend keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, freak?" or "Don't block the driveway, idiot!"

A good friend helps you find your prince. A best friend kidnaps him and brings him to you and says, "Here ya go. Simple."

A good friend will offer you a soda. A best friend will dump theirs on you and say, "Ten bucks."

A good friend will help you move. A best friend will help you move the bodies.

A good friend will bail you out of jail. A best friend would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"

A good friend has never seen you cry. A best friend won't tell anyone else that you cried... just laugh about it in private with you when you aren't down anymore.

A good friend asks you to write down your number. A best friend has you on speed dial and has memorized your number better than her own.

A good friend knows a few things about you. A best friend could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story.

A good friend tells you she knows how you feel. A best friend just sits down and cries.

A good friend will help you learn to drive. A best friend will help you roll the car into the lake so you can collect insurance money.

Friends vs. Best Friends.

FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.
BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.

FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.
BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.
BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore.

FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.
BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.
BEST FRIENDS: Loses your shirt and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.
BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowd home that left you

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.
BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.

FRIENDS: Are only through highschool/college.
BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.

FRIENDS: Will give you their umbrella when it's raining.
BEST FRIENDS: Will take yours and yell "RUN GIRL RUN!!"

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.
BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you saying "We screwed up again. But it was fun while it lasted."

FRIENDS: Would ignore this letter
BEST FRIENDS: Will repost this!!!

"My God what is that smell?" "It's called Fresh air" -Sinead and Ian (Medusa Plot)

"Turn right now." "Now? All I see is a bloody narrow gap between trees" - GPS and Ian (Dead Of Night)

"Or how you people in the US Provinces say...Bungee!" "I believe it is Bingo" -Natalie and Alistair (The Sword Thief) "Lovely" -Ian (The Sword Thief)

"So, like, I could say A – has a face like a baboon butt, and you wouldn't know who I'm talking about?"-Dan (Maze Of Bones)

"Oh great. I'm in South Korea and now my sister is Julie Andrews" -Dan (The Sword Thief)

"Executor?" "That means he killed her?" -Dan (Maze Of Bones)

"Those are Cobras, not the really cute ones. Like Ian" -Dan

"Your a Thief" "Not a thief, Amy. A Lucian" -Ian and Amy (Maze of Bones)

''But today I'm the good guy. You gotta see that, Amy.'' ''Because you make gangster pop-up books?" "Exactly!" -Dan and Jonah (One False Note)

"Hello, Love" -Ian to Amy (Practically every time they meet.)

Pairings I support:








Pairings I will never support (get medicine prescribed for yourself if you support any one of them):

Amy/Evan Tolliver



Ian/Dan (NOT funny)

Ian/Hamilton (Ditto)

Amy/ (Anyone apart from Ian Kabra)

Put this in your profile
if you love to laugh!

Crazy Labels:

On Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
(OH NO! What do I do when I need to use it while im asleep?)

On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(Awesome! So could you just turn around and pretend nothing's happening while I rip open the chips?)

On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
(Thanks, that was helpful! I was gonna use it like irregular soap)

On some Swann frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
(Hmmm, I could also freeze it, on the other hand.)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
Do not turn upside down.
(Too late!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
(Woot! Hey, wait a sec.. won't products be COLD after HEATING?)

On Nytol sleep aid:
Warning: may cause drowsiness.
(You'd better hope it does that, or you get a refund!)

On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: keep out of children.
(Truer words have never been spoken, apart from "Amian is awesome")

On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
(As opposed to outer space.)

On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
(Now I'm curious.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: contains nuts.

(No corn?)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
(Somebody got paid big bucks to write this one..)

On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
(Raise your hand if you've tried this.)

You know you're a 39 Clues fan when...

You are one-hundred percent sure that Kurt is a Vesper spy (DEFINITELY... I will kill him someday... No, IAN will kill him someday)

You cried (or at least felt like it) when Irina died (Yeah. I was pretty upset.)

You wish Ian and Amy would just kiss and make up already! (Do ya think threats will work?)

Whenever you see something suspicious, you claim it's a Vesper spy sent to kill you (75 percent chance!)

You've read nearly every FanFiction on the 39 Clues fandom (YEAP)Anytime someone talks about someone famous like George Washington, you're always telling them what Cahill branch they're from (Winston Churchill was a Lucian. But my Janus friends are irritated when I start spazzing)

\Whenever you see a famous guy like Benjamin Rush or John Hancock, you wonder if they're a Cahill, Vesper, or none of the above (Evan "Twinkles" Tolliver is a 100% VESPER)

Your parents roll their eyes whenever you bring it up, because you talk about it WAY too much (My parents are probably tired of hearing about it)

You started liking History because 1) Amy and Jonah like it 2) You need to prepare for the hunt, and 3) You need to know more about your relatives (The time I screamed out OMG PUYI WAS A CAHILL in histoy class? That seems familiar. Very familiar.)

You try to live up to the expectations of your branch: you're an Ekaterina, so you're constantly trying to get better at math and/or science; yoru're a Janus, so you're always practicing music, writing and drawing; you're a Lucian, so you're always trying to solve puzzles and get better at lying...err, I mean acting; you're a Tomas, so you're always trying to do brave things, like water skiing. (Im a Lucian, I get better at lying and blackmailing as the days go by)

You're going to buy the movie when it comes out, even if it stinks (which you know it will because that's how it is with books-turned-into-movies, they're never as good as the books themselves) (I will throw my shoe at the movie if anything is changed, but I will buy it.)

You hate it when people remind you that the 39 Clues aren't real, and come up with a hundred reasons why it very well possibly could be real (Are you implying its not real?)

Most of your daydreams consist of at least one character from the 39 Clues series (Wanna bet?)

You have a crush on one of the book characters.(Im not telling

You wish you could meet all the authors (Peter Lerangis fan club, anyone?)

Did you know that 98% of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93% of the people that read this won’t repost it?

Jesus had no servants, yet they called him Master...

He had no degree, yet they called him Teacher...

He had no medicine, yet they called him Healer...

He had no army, yet kings feared him...

He won no military battles, yet he conquered the world...

He committed no crime, yet they crucified Him...

He was buried in a tomb, yet He lives today

Feel honoured to serve such a leader who loves us...

If you believe in God, Father, Son, and Holy Ghost

then copy and paste this in your profile

If you believe in Jesus Christ put this in your profile and don't just ignore this, because in the Bible it says, ‘If you deny me, I will deny you in front of my Father in the gates of Heaven.

If you support Ian and Amy paste the following on your profile:

Ian's Nightmare

Ian Kabra was trapped.

Then he heard it, like a phantom whisper:

"Ian, I'm going to get you."

Amy's voice was loud, surrounding him.

"Ian, I'm at your parents room."

Ian tried to call out, to repent, to say he was sorry, and that he loved her, but his voice wouldn't work.

"Ian, they're dead."

No. Not again. The same nightmare, every night since Pukhansan.

"Ian, I'm at the stairs now."

Ian wanted to scream, to run away, to escape this madhouse. But it was like he was welded in place.

"Ian, I'm at your sister's room."

Why, why did he do it? He liked her, no, he loved her.

"Ian, she's dead."

He knew. He knew this dream. He knew who was next.

"Ian, why'd you do it?"

He tried, once again, to tell her why his parents made him, but still no words came out.

"Ian, did you care?"

"Yes!" he wanted to cry out, but still no sound came

"Ian, I'm going to get you."

"No," he thought. "Not again"

"Ian, I'm here."

There she was. Amy Cahill, her skin pale, her herself dead, and wielding a knife.

"Ian, you're..."

A sharp pain arose in Ian's chest.



Ian woke up in a cold sweat.

Only a dream. It was only a dream. He looked at the clock.

6:42 am. Still time, still time to repent. The time was now. Right now.

He picked up the phone and dialed as quickly as his shaking fingers would allow. A soft voice stuttered on the other end. "H-hello?" it said. Ian took a long breath, and said:

"I'm sorry, love"

39 Clues Creed.

When I'm at a funeral, I'll always wonder if the person who died was a Cahill.

When I'm about to make a choice that will change my life, I'll remember Mr. McIntyre

When I hear about Hollywood, I'll think of all the Janus and what drama they're pulling now.

When I hear about waring countries, I'll remember those silly little Lucians. (wait a moment... Silly little Lucians? Lucians' aren't silly!!)

When ever there's an athletic event, I'll hope I won't face a Tomas.

When I study hard, I'll wish for the brain of an Ekaterina.

When I see families breaking up, and hurting each other, I'll remember Olivia Cahill, and the pain she went through.

When I see people trying to pick up the pieces and start over, I'll remember Madeleine.

When I hear a cat 'Mrrrp'-ing, I'll think of Saladin.

When I see crazy teenagers rocking out, I'll remember Nellie.

When I see eleven-year-old boys being boys, I'll remember Dan.

When I act crazy shy or stick my face in a book, I'll remember Amy.

When I see a family of sport fanatics, I'll remember the Holts.

When I see people acting like spies, I'll remember Irina.

When I see a monkey, I'll remember the innocent Nikolai

When ever I hear a British accent, I'll think of Ian.

When I see a girl having a tantrum, I'll think of Natalie.

When I hear about acts of cruelty and murder, I'll shudder and remember Isabel.

When I think about the world in general, I'll think about every other Cahill in the world who don't know who they are.

If you love the 39 Clues as much as I do, repost this and add your name to the list.

roxy5000123, blackstarfairyfiend, Evanescence456, RageRunsStill, Lapulta, Madrigal Queen, luverinreadin, kahilllkid5, amianfreak19, WickedWickedMe

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The Market on Mondays by Hopeful Smile reviews
Amy goes to the grocery every Monday for a reason. Then some one screwed with her schedule, with a hundred kisses. AU/OOC
39 Clues - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,161 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 4/20/2013 - Published: 10/13/2012 - Amy C., Ian K.
Before You Go by yanizoid reviews
"My eulogy," Natalie repeated. "You're going to say my eulogy in front of a live me."
39 Clues - Rated: T - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,005 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/25/2012 - Natalie K., Dan C. - Complete
39 Clues Facebook by acewiththeface reviews
The 39 Clues characters find Facebook! Cue the hilarity!
39 Clues - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 4,312 - Reviews: 192 - Favs: 45 - Follows: 43 - Updated: 10/2/2012 - Published: 2/18/2012
I Try by Please-and-Thankyou's reviews
I love AnyXIan, so here's a story. Ian is having a flashback of that fateful night where he swallowed his pride and GOT THE GIRL!
39 Clues - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 906 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/21/2012 - Amy C., Ian K. - Complete
Twice the Speed of Light by Scintillating Golden Leaves reviews
I flashed him a white teeth smile, one that I knew would scare more people. "Are you trying to be charming? Because it's not working."
39 Clues - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,188 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/14/2012 - Hope C., Arthur T.
oh, all the small things by Kaye Nightshade reviews
"... Oh, so we're now talking about the weather?" One-Shot. Ian/Amy Fluff.
39 Clues - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 890 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/29/2012 - Amy C., Ian K. - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

I'll take it with extra cream reviews
Natalie's working as a waitress at a cafe in Boston because of a Cahill assignment, where she meets a certain blonde haired, green eyed boy. And he happens to take his coffee with extra cream and a kiss.
39 Clues - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 10,575 - Reviews: 89 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 35 - Updated: 6/22/2013 - Published: 5/26/2012 - Dan C., Natalie K.
Distractions reviews
Photoshop Jake's head onto a mouse/Plan a siege on Evan's house/KURT DID WHAT? He's gonna pay/If he's dead it'll make my day. For all Amian shippers and Jake/Kurt/Evan haters. I promise you will like this.
39 Clues - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 266 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 3 - Published: 11/28/2012
The Circle of Logic reviews
All Kabras are Cobras. Cahills are not Kabras. Cahills are not Cobras. Unless a Cahill marries a Kabra, then the Cahill is a Cobra. The Kabra is still a Cobra. Kabras are Cobras, Cahills are not Cobras, Tollivers are Twinkies. But if a Cahill is about to become a Twinkie and not a Cobra, it is classified into Class 1A and immediate action will be taken. Such is the Circle of Logic
39 Clues - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,953 - Reviews: 51 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 11/22/2012 - Published: 6/21/2012 - Amy C., Ian K.
Before my Cell Phone Dies reviews
I dial your number again/The dull buzz of the dial tone/Nobody's picking up/I don't hear your voice/I just want to speak to you one last time/So/Just answer this call before I hear/That lady's voice again/Too late.
39 Clues - Rated: T - English - Romance/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 286 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 3 - Published: 10/2/2012 - Amy C., Ian K. - Complete
Cherries reviews
The gate creaked open without a sound, unlike the past times he had been here. She must have oiled it recently. And he smiled, and she smiled, and the smell of cherries lingered in the air. Amian. Of course.
39 Clues - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,342 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 5 - Published: 8/7/2012 - Amy C., Ian K. - Complete
Mercury Poisoning reviews
Amian, Evamy BASHING , add a hint of Natan. Pour into a bottle, shake well. Step back. Wait for explosion. P.S : Serve with a tiny hint of wickedness.
39 Clues - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 6,538 - Reviews: 66 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 6/17/2012 - Published: 5/21/2012 - Amy C., Ian K.
A Summer's Day in May reviews
For Ninja's 13th birthday contest: Nobody is around to celebrate Natalie's birthday for her... Or is there?
39 Clues - Rated: T - English - Family/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 549 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/5/2012 - Natalie K.