MyMuseThyNameIsTwilight
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Joined 12-25-11, id: 3563466, Profile Updated: 11-11-12
Author has written 5 stories for Twilight.

About Me: I love, live, and breathe Twilight. I love the concept of vampires, but I'm pretty picky about which ones I let myself be seen with... Like Adrian, or Dimitri (and YES, I know he's half-half, so back off, haters), or Edward, or Emmett, or Jasper, or Carlisle, or Laurent (dang!!! that accent is downright MOUTHWATERING!!).

Friends or Best Friends???

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.
BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore.

FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.
BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.
BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.
BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME, SO Y'ALL BETTER HIDE THE FRICKIN OREOS!"

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.
BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.

FRIENDS: Are only through highschool/college. (aka: drinking buddies)
BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.

FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough.
BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say "Girl drink the rest of that ! You know we don't waste!

A good friend will comfort you if a guy breaks your heart. But a real, true friend, will go up to him and say "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"

A good friend won't eat anything except what is offered to them at your house. But a real, true friend will add to the grocery list what they ate already.

A good friend is afraid to bring up politics with your parents for fear of offending them. But a real, true friend already knows all their good arguments.

A friend will bail you out of jail. But a real, true friend will be in your cell saying, "Damn, that was fun! Let's do it again!..."

A good friend will comfort you when he breaks up with you. But a real, true friend will call him, whispering "Seven days..."

A good friend helps you up when you fall. But a real, true continues walking while saying, "Walk much, dumbass?"

A good friend will let you tell them about your really bad day over the phone. But a real, true friend will be over in ten minutes with a chick flick and a gallon of ice cream.

A friend gives you their umbrella in the rain. But a real, true friend takes yours and says, "RUN, YOU MOTHASUCKA, RUN!"

A good friend helps you find your prince. A best friend kidnaps him and brings him to you.

A good friend will ask you if you're okay when you're crying. A best friend already has a shovel ready to bury the loser who made you cry.

A good friend will offer you a soda. A best friend will dump theirs on you.

A good friend will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month. A best friend will throw you a tampon and push you in.

A good friend will help you move. A best friend will help you move the bodies.

A good friend tells you she knows how you feel. A best friend just sits down and cries.

We're best friends. You laugh, I laugh. You cry, I cry. You hurt, I hurt. You jump off a bridge, damn, I'm gonna miss your dumb ass.FRIENDS: Would ignore this letter

BEST FRIENDS: Will repost this shit!

YOU KNOW YOU'RE AN AUTHOR IF...

You talk to yourself a lot. (Alot meaning all the time...)

You talk to yourself about talking to yourself. (e.g. 'Why do I constantly ask my self random things?')

When you talk to yourself you often talk to yourself like you're talking to someone else. (e.g. 'Have you ever noticed that deliver could mean someone's liver?')

After uttering a profound piece of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand with awe and say, "Wow,this stuff is great for sugar highs...'

You live off of sugar and caffeine (the two greatest things ever discovered!)

You'll check your e-mail every day of the week and then disappear off the face of the earth.

You're e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random.

When replying to an e-mail, you'll never actually address the point of it.

You tend to collect Bic Stics off the ground like picking pennies off the ground.

No matter where you are in a room you never have to get up to find a pen/pencil and paper.

The letters on your keyboard are wearing off.

Your friends and family think that you have carpal tunnel syndrome.

People think you have A.D.H.D.

You think it'd be cool to have A.D.H.D.

You constantly start talking in third person, present or past tense.

You start thinking about making lists like this and start giggling for no "apparent" reason

Your friends stopped looking at you funny when you laugh for no apparent reason a loooooong time ago.

And FINALLY, the one way to tell if you're a good writer: You failed English 101.

My Names:

MY GANGSTA NAME:(first 3 letters of real name plus izzle): Rocizzle

MY DETECTIVE NAME: (fav color and fav animal): Teal Snow Tiger

MY SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, and current street name): Marie Smart Aleck

MY STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of my last name, first 2 letters of my first name, last 3 letters of mom's maiden name): Ricrocks

MY SUPERHERO NAME: (2nd favorite color, favorite drink): Crimson Viper

MY ARAB NAME: (2nd letter of my first name, 3rd letter of my last name, any letter of my middle name, 2nd letter of my moms maiden name, 3rd letter of my dads middle name, 1st letter of my siblings first name, last letter of my middle name):Ocrinbe

MY WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mothers middle name): Marie

MY GOTH NAME: (black, and the name of one your pets): Black Killer


Girls
are like
apples on trees.
The best ones are
at the top of the tree.The
boys don't want to reach
for the good ones because they
are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy. So the apples at the top think
something is wrong with them, when in
reality, they're amazing. They just
have to wait for the right boy to
come along, the one who's
brave enough to
climb all
the way
to the top
of the tree

- YOUR GUY SIDE -

You love hoodies.
You love jeans.
Dogs are better than cats.
It's hilarious when people get hurt.
You've played with/against boys on a team.
Shopping is torture.
Sad movies suck.
You own/ed an X-Box
Played with Hotwheel cars as a kid.
At some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter.
You own/ed a DS, PS2 or Sega.
You used to be obsessed with Power Rangers.
You watch sports on TV.
Gory movies are cool.
You go to your dad for advice.
You own like a trillion baseball caps.
You like going to high school football games.
You used to/do collect football/baseball cards.
Baggy pants are cool to wear.
It's kind of weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people.
Green, black, red, blue or silver are one of your favourite colors.
You love to go crazy and not care what people think.
Sports are fun.
Talk with food in your mouth.
Sleep with your socks on at night.

TOTAL: 22

- YOUR GIRL SIDE -

You wear lip gloss/stick.
You love skirts.
Cats are better than dogs.
You love to shop.
You wear eyeliner.
You wear the color pink.
Go to your mum for advice.
Pink, yellow, orange, purple or gold is one of your favourite colors
You hate wearing the colour black.
You like hanging out at the shopping centre.
You like getting manicures and/or pedicures.
You like wearing jewellery.
Shopping is one of your favourite hobbies.
You don't like the movie Star Wars.
You were in gymnastics/dance.
It takes you around/ more one hour to shower, get dressed and make-up.
You smile a lot more than you should.
You have more than 10 pairs of shoes.

You care about what you look like.
You like wearing dresses when you can

You like wearing body perfume.
You love the movies
Used to play with dolls as little kid.
Like being the star of everything.

Total:18

Well... I guess I need to have a talk with my doctor...

Copy and Paste:

If you've gotten closer with friends, copy and paste on your profile.

If your close friends are really funny, copy and paste on your profile.

If you like to hang out with friends, copy and paste on your profile.

If you have ever pushed on a door that said "Pull" or pulled on a door that said "Push", copy this into your profile.

If you have your own little world, copy this on your profile.

If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this on your profile.

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy this on your profile.

If you have ever tripped over air, copy this on your profile

If you hear the voices of the characters in your head, copy this on your profile.

If you love rain, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you are anti-social sometimes, copy this on your profile.

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you collect these, copy this on your profile.

Ninety-eight percent of teenagers do or have tried smoking pot. If you're part of the two percent who hasn't, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you're quiet a lot, but you're ALSO really loud, copy this on your profile.

If you are random and don't care, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you actually take the time to read other peoples profiles, copy this on your profile.

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this on your profile.

If you have embarrassing memories that make you want to smack yourself/someone else, copy this on your profile.

If you've ever burst out laughing while reading a book and people looked at you weird, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you've ever said a totally random comment that had nothing to do with the conversation for no reason whatsoever, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you've ever spent a long amount of time looking for something that you were holding/wearing, copy this on your profile.

If you are obsessed with something and people have told you that you are crazy, copy this on your profile.

If you ever fell off a chair backwards, copy this on your profile.

If you have ever fallen up the stairs, copy this on your profile.

If you've ever threatened your computer, copy and paste this on your profile. (The scary thing is that it has come-backs... O.o)

If you've ever done homework, were reading a story on fanfiction, were writing a story for fanfiction, were talking to a friend, or were watching TV at the same time, copy and paste this on your profile. (Yeah, girls can multi-task.)

If you randomly check your e-mail every five minutes while on the computer, copy this on your profile.

Things That Make Me Laugh (I did NOT come up with these. I am just not that creative.)

"Everyone thinks they can be a writer. Most people don't understand what's involved. The real writers persevere. The ones that don't either don't have enough fortitude and they probably wouldn't succeed anyway, or they fall in love with the glamour of writing as opposed to the writing of writing."
-Peter McWiliams

"The worst thing that being an artist (writer/painter/musician) could do to you, would be that it would make you slightly unhappy constantly."
-J. D. Salinger

"It took me fifteen years to discover that I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up because by that time I was too famous."
-Robert Benchley

"Writing is the hardest work in the world. I have been a bricklayer and a truck driver, and I tell you – as if you haven't been told a million times already – that writing is harder. Lonelier. And nobler and more enriching."
-Harlan Ellison

"The quality which makes man want to write and be read is essentially a desire for self-exposure and masochism. Like one of those guys who has a compulsion to take his thing out and show it on the street."
-James Jones

Y'all Just Got Served!!!!

Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.

Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.

Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.

Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.

Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?

Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together.
Woman: Really? I'd put f and u together.

10 Reasons Why I Love Dimitri Belikov:

1)Who doesn't love a smexy Russian?

2)He didn't impregnate his girlfriend (Cough cough you shouldn't have done that Edward!!)

3)He's wonderful to imagine talking or being with when no one is watching :D

4)Dimitri can kick ass (Yes I'm looking at you Adrian)

5)He makes you love Russia so much that if you lived in the US in 1950's you would get shunned

6)Dimitri makes us all want to believe that Vampires are real

7)Dimitri makes me believe in God (Russian God that is)

8)He's not a stalker like Edward and doesn't like watching people sleep when they don't know he is there.

9)He makes you want to check out every single book that your library has that has about anything and everything to do with Russia

10)With Dimitri you will never freeze cuz he's just that hot :D

I have been diagnosed
with Obsessive Cullen
Disorder. Put this on your
profile if you have it too.

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Quiet On The Set by duhitsangie reviews
America's sweetheart Isabella Swan and Hollywood's playboy Edward Cullen are cast together in an upcoming movie. Will there be sparks or will things just be quiet on the set? And is everything the tabloids say just as it seems? M for Lemons
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 29 - Words: 115,720 - Reviews: 1313 - Favs: 1,667 - Follows: 1,827 - Updated: 7/11/2014 - Published: 1/26/2011 - Bella, Edward
Ruined by xoxoSoftballTwihard28xoxo reviews
What were to happen if Edward never came back? It's 90 years later and there is a whole lot of drama going on. Will fate bring back these two lovebirds or will they just be mistakes in each others life?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 6 - Words: 5,817 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 4/4/2014 - Published: 2/11/2012 - Edward, Bella
All Twisted Up by xoxoSoftballTwihard28xoxo reviews
What were to happen if the Cullens found a mysterious book that was called Twilight? Would anything change between Edward and Bella? Will Edward find Bella before she comes to Forks? This story takes place before Twilight: Sorry bad at summaries:
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 7 - Words: 20,336 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 3/22/2014 - Published: 11/25/2011
A May to December Romance by Positively 4th Street reviews
My name is Isabella Swan and today, I signed a contract that would put me in the steel tight clutches of a man I didn't know, for four years. A girl's gotta pay for college somehow, right? AH. Come meet 'Sugar Daddy' Edward.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 20 - Words: 142,603 - Reviews: 7742 - Favs: 8,212 - Follows: 9,882 - Updated: 8/16/2012 - Published: 1/7/2011 - Bella, Edward
Only Human by Amethyst Jackson reviews
Complete. A wish sends Bella back in time to Chicago, 1918, and to a human Edward. This story is baby-free.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 28 - Words: 60,635 - Reviews: 5910 - Favs: 9,618 - Follows: 2,460 - Updated: 4/7/2010 - Published: 6/1/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The True Meaning of Army Strong reviews
Set between New Moon and Eclipse. Bella and Edward are back on track and things are going great... Until the day she gets a call from Uncle Sam that changes everything. Please read! My first FanFic!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Suspense - Chapters: 11 - Words: 11,929 - Reviews: 65 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 48 - Updated: 11/4/2012 - Published: 12/28/2011 - Bella, Edward
An Ironic Destiny reviews
Set Post-Twilight, Pre-New Moon. The Cullens adopted Bella after Victoria killed Charlie and Renee. What started as a normal, Cullen family night soon became the beginning of Bella's true destiny. What will Edward think? How will this affect their lives? ON TEMP HIATUS.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 5 - Words: 4,091 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 9/7/2012 - Published: 1/14/2012 - Bella, Edward
Love Me Tender reviews
It's 100 years from when Edward left. He never came back, Jacob never came into the picture, and there're two more children and one more mate thrown into the picture. The result? Mayhem. HEA? Yep.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 5,309 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 9/7/2012 - Published: 3/25/2012 - Bella, Edward
Five Years Later reviews
I had to get this out, it served as my virtual shoulder to cry on. Please R&R!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 739 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Published: 2/15/2012 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Endless Love reviews
Bella's left all alone at the Cullen house for a night. What will she do to occupy her time? Will things go according to plan?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Family/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,170 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/1/2012 - Bella, Edward