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Joined 01-03-12, id: 3591692
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Making Lemonade by Dayja reviews
Life has given Harry a lot of lemons: dead parents, a cupboard under the stairs, horrible clothes, Harry Hunting. The result should have been a downtrodden, sad little boy. It isn't.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,462 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 64 - Follows: 39 - Published: 3/18 - Harry P., Petunia D., Dudley D., Vernon D. - Complete
The Price is Right by Hi Pot And News reviews
AU Harry is more money-conscious when he arrives at Gringotts with Hagrid. He's not going to let the wonder of magic take away his common sense and if he can get a good deal, he's going to take it. Point of deviation: Harry's primary school taught Home Economics.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 40,211 - Reviews: 408 - Favs: 1,811 - Follows: 2,228 - Updated: 1/28 - Published: 12/2/2013 - Harry P., Dean T., Justin F., Morag M.
Harry the Hufflepuff by BajaB reviews
Luckily, lazy came up in Petunia's tirades slightly more often than freak, otherwise, this could have been a very different story. AU. Not your usual Hufflepuff!Harry story.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 29,176 - Reviews: 1214 - Favs: 4,996 - Follows: 1,634 - Updated: 1/7 - Published: 11/10/2010 - Harry P. - Complete
Harry the Hufflepuff 3 - Harry's Year off by BajaB reviews
Sequel - Read the others first, of course. Lazy!harry is back for another year of doing nothing. This will not be a long story. Sorry for the wait.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 23,967 - Reviews: 324 - Favs: 1,204 - Follows: 720 - Updated: 12/23/2014 - Published: 11/23/2014 - Complete
Inspected By No 13 by Clell65619 reviews
When he learns that flying anywhere near a Dragon is a recipe for suicide, Harry tries a last minute change of tactics, one designed to use the power of the Bureaucracy forcing him to compete against itself. Little does he know that his solution is its own kind of trap.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 3 - Words: 18,472 - Reviews: 885 - Favs: 2,885 - Follows: 1,461 - Updated: 8/20/2014 - Published: 6/26/2014 - Complete
The Dog and His Boy by rhyejess reviews
After the canon events of October 1981, Sirius is not captures by Aurors. He transforms into his animagus form, and he follows Harry to the Dursleys. Harry grows up with the feisty Padfoot as his best friend and companion and thus, when he is accepted into Hogwarts at his 11th birthday, he refuses to come unless he can bring his dog as his familiar. Once at Hogwarts, Snape is behav
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 32,568 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 149 - Follows: 44 - Published: 6/6/2014 - Harry P., Sirius B. - Complete
Scrimper Saver Wizard Saviour by loverofeevee reviews
There's lots of stories where Harry's independent and has lots of things to help him on his journey, but what if he decided he didn't want to be materialistic, having tones of books and whatnot? A little story about Harry the tight fisted saviour.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 5 - Words: 13,742 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 156 - Follows: 104 - Updated: 5/22/2014 - Published: 5/13/2014 - Harry P. - Complete
Weary Wizard by Yunaine reviews
When a few inappropriate questions derail the meeting at the Hog's Head, Harry lets the situation play out. Eventually, he refuses to commit his free time to teach a bunch of easily distracted fools. - Set during fifth year; Harry/Hermione
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 18,450 - Reviews: 319 - Favs: 3,025 - Follows: 727 - Published: 4/26/2014 - [Harry P., Hermione G.] - Complete
Inhibitions by E4mj reviews
Harry with no inhibitions could mean a lot of things get done quickly. Snape's POV of a potions accident with interesting effects. A lot of things are left unexplained: It is JUST a ficlet. A little thought that came to me after reading a potions/disaster story, un-developed mostly. Rating for swears.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Parody - Chapters: 6 - Words: 5,825 - Reviews: 107 - Favs: 520 - Follows: 124 - Published: 3/10/2014 - Harry P., Severus S. - Complete
Harry Potter and the Garden by rumblestiltsken reviews
Harry has a power the Dark Lord knows not, and this time it is weaponisable. Who needs the power of love? A Comedy!Punshot.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,961 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 51 - Follows: 16 - Published: 2/18/2014 - Harry P. - Complete
Escapologist Harry by Racke reviews
Harry runs away at age four. After bringing him back, Dumbledore's attempts to keep him at Privet Drive gets progressively more ridiculously extreme with each of his escapes. Animagus!Harry, Crack
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,884 - Reviews: 314 - Favs: 2,745 - Follows: 624 - Published: 7/8/2013 - Harry P. - Complete
Planning Ahead by Bil reviews
AU 4th year. In which Voldemort's plans are upset, Severus is annoyed, and Harry has a new career goal. There is also a kitten, because kittens are cool. Oneshot.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,690 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 114 - Follows: 19 - Published: 5/23/2013 - Harry P., Severus S. - Complete
Nothing to Lose by Writing Warriors reviews
This story, as a few are in the world of Harry Potter fanfiction, stems from one of those many ideas of Rorschachs Blot, entitled "Nothing to Lose." One of the areas this story will explore is the possible impact on Harry Potter and friends of the isolation that our dear old friend, Albus Dumbledore, always fed to him: this isolation will make up its own reality.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 22 - Words: 59,681 - Reviews: 1344 - Favs: 2,253 - Follows: 1,971 - Updated: 5/1/2013 - Published: 11/1/2012 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
10 Minutes And A Week Of Hell! by CrazyDuck5280 reviews
10 Minutes can be the difference between the peace and the hell at Hogwarts! AU third year
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 10,152 - Reviews: 153 - Favs: 1,119 - Follows: 327 - Updated: 2/10/2013 - Published: 6/25/2012 - Harry P. - Complete
Routine Procedure by meggannn reviews
A meeting at a broken-down red telephone box. Sherlock needs to make a call and Harry's just trying to get to work.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Sherlock - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 852 - Reviews: 63 - Favs: 209 - Follows: 112 - Published: 7/13/2012 - Harry P., Sherlock H. - Complete
Who Needs Obliviators? by Drauchenfyre reviews
British Aurors Obliviate Muggles to keep magic a secret. What if other countries did it differently?
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 705 - Reviews: 88 - Favs: 425 - Follows: 76 - Published: 3/25/2012 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
Lessons With Hagrid by NothingPretentious reviews
"Have you found out how to get past that beast of Hagrid's yet?" ...Snape kicks Harry out of 'Remedial Potions', but as we know from The Philosopher's Stone, there is another Occlumens in the school good enough to keep out the Dark Lord. Stupid oneshot.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,357 - Reviews: 442 - Favs: 2,204 - Follows: 355 - Published: 10/31/2011 - Rubeus H. - Complete
Don't Come Unarmed to a Battle of Wits by Drauchenfyre reviews
Voldemort arrives in Godric's Hollow to a huge surprise...
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,884 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 119 - Follows: 25 - Published: 9/30/2011 - Albus D., Voldemort - Complete
When Is It a Contract by Aealket reviews
Luna wants to have a better third year, so she asked her Daddy what to do.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 18,433 - Reviews: 410 - Favs: 2,235 - Follows: 469 - Published: 9/14/2011 - Harry P. - Complete
And Bits of Fluff by Teufel1987 reviews
What if clearing your mind isn't the only way to keep people out of your head?
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,539 - Reviews: 90 - Favs: 401 - Follows: 85 - Published: 11/28/2010 - Harry P., Severus S. - Complete
HJG: The Smartest Witch of Her Age? by HarnGin reviews
Hermione attends a very one-sided, yet eye-opening, job interview. Some non-canon content; not for Hermione fanatics.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,705 - Reviews: 147 - Favs: 434 - Follows: 81 - Published: 3/31/2010 - Hermione G., OC - Complete
You're a What? by Farsight020 reviews
When a familiar Death Eater threatens a young Muggle, he gets a different reaction than he expected. As do Voldemort, the Obliviators, and Cornelius Fudge. Now added: Hannah and her Meeting with the Savior of the World. Pure Humor. Enjoy!
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 4,764 - Reviews: 121 - Favs: 321 - Follows: 99 - Updated: 3/9/2010 - Published: 10/25/2007 - Lucius M., Voldemort - Complete
Hedwig and the Goblet of Fire by Meteoricshipyards reviews
Harry uses Hedwig to test the restrictions on the Goblet of Fire. Obviously, they're not good enough to stop the smartest owl in Britain!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,993 - Reviews: 334 - Favs: 2,232 - Follows: 459 - Published: 2/26/2010 - Harry P., Parvati P. - Complete
The Inner Eye of Harry Potter by jbern reviews
Imagine Harry Potter raised under the guiding hand of Sibyll Trelawney. He arrives at Hogwarts versed in the higher arts of Divination, Arithmancy, Numerology, and Palmistry - you know 'real magic.' Prepare yourself for one humorous ride.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 5 - Words: 39,566 - Reviews: 866 - Favs: 1,947 - Follows: 2,027 - Updated: 2/12/2010 - Published: 4/3/2009 - Harry P., Sybill T.
Harry's New Home by kbinnz reviews
One lonely little boy. One snarky, grumpy git. When the safety of one was entrusted to the other, everyone knew this was not going to turn out well... Or was it? AU, sequel to "Harry's First Detention". OVER FOUR MILLION HITS!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 64 - Words: 318,389 - Reviews: 10620 - Favs: 5,955 - Follows: 2,273 - Updated: 10/16/2009 - Published: 7/31/2008 - Harry P., Severus S. - Complete
All The Dementors of Azkaban by LifeWriter reviews
AU PoA: When Luna Lovegood is condemned to Azkaban prison for her part in opening the Chamber of Secrets, Harry Potter is the first to protest. Minister Fudge is reluctant to comply, but then again he never really had a choice in the first place. Oneshot.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 14,603 - Reviews: 938 - Favs: 4,904 - Follows: 893 - Published: 9/12/2009 - Harry P., Luna L. - Complete
Divination is a Wooly Subject by KafkaExMachina reviews
A different outcome to Harry's discussion with Albus at the end of OotP. Not Slash
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,618 - Reviews: 160 - Favs: 532 - Follows: 119 - Published: 7/26/2009 - Harry P., Albus D. - Complete
Harry's Little Army of Psychos by RuneWitchSakura reviews
Oneshot from Ron’s POV. Ron tries to explain to the twins just how Harry made the Ministry of Magic make a new classification for magical creatures, and why the puffskeins were now considered the scariest magical creature of all time. No pairings.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,308 - Reviews: 589 - Favs: 4,039 - Follows: 605 - Published: 3/27/2009 - Ron W., Harry P. - Complete
Strawberry Fields by Minstrel Knight reviews
A hypothetical AU in which a most unlikely person removes a baby Harry from Privet Drive and leaves him with the Grangers, along with seven popular children's books. HarryGinny.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 18,879 - Reviews: 67 - Favs: 293 - Follows: 57 - Published: 3/22/2009 - Harry P., Ginny W. - Complete
Trigger Happy by Rickysio reviews
Dumbledore, against his better judgement, decided to allow Alastor Moody custody of the Potter scion. Years later, he has to reap the whirlwind. Oneshot.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,377 - Reviews: 86 - Favs: 705 - Follows: 130 - Published: 1/7/2009 - Harry P., Alastor M. - Complete
Out of Azkaban by Laume reviews
Formerly on the account of Luke Kenobi. Written for the Third Floor Corridor Cliche Contest. Harry and Snape have been sent to Azkaban on false charges. Once out, they are not what the Order expects.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 8 - Words: 15,368 - Reviews: 422 - Favs: 1,733 - Follows: 409 - Updated: 7/29/2008 - Published: 6/17/2008 - Harry P., Severus S. - Complete
Deathly Hallows Alternate Ending Number 30 by TwiLyght Sans Sparkles reviews
Here's another alternate ending for DH...please R&R!
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,222 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 39 - Follows: 4 - Published: 7/7/2008 - Complete
The Ultimate Escape Artist by dogbertcarroll reviews
Harry's magic changes him in ways that no wizard has ever dealt with before as he attempts to escape the cupboard once and for all!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,640 - Reviews: 343 - Favs: 1,131 - Follows: 959 - Published: 5/24/2008 - Harry P.
A Very Young Girl's Record of Her Own Impressions by Eggo Waffles reviews
Ariana Dumbledore shares her thoughts on Oscar Wilde, Nietzsche, and Gellert Grindelwald's bum. AberforthGoat, AlbusGellert, onesided ElphiasAlbus.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,632 - Reviews: 53 - Favs: 124 - Follows: 10 - Published: 11/16/2007 - Albus D. - Complete
Logical Consequences by Laume reviews
For many years the Wizarding World turned a blind eye. Now they must face the consequences as the tables are turned on them.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,167 - Reviews: 235 - Favs: 1,325 - Follows: 263 - Published: 9/1/2007 - Harry P., Voldemort - Complete
Matters of Honor by The-Caitiff reviews
Harry thinks up a plan to deal with those unpleasent aspects of Hogwarts life. School is in session less than hour before one man is dead and another headed for Azkaban.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,538 - Reviews: 95 - Favs: 337 - Follows: 103 - Published: 3/13/2007 - Complete
Battles with Basilisks by SnorkackCatcher reviews
AU. Harry and Ron visit the office of the Defence Against the Dark Arts Professor to tell him where the Chamber of Secrets is. Everything Gilderoy Lockhart writes about himself is actually true.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,241 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 91 - Follows: 21 - Published: 12/28/2006 - Gilderoy L., Harry P. - Complete
Just a Random Tuesday… by Twisted Biscuit reviews
A VERY long Tuesday in the life of Minerva McGonagall. With rampant Umbridgeitis, uncooperative Slytherins, Ministry interventions, an absent Dumbledore and a schoolwide shortage of Hot Cocoa, it’s a wonder she’s as nice as she is.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 58,525 - Reviews: 374 - Favs: 1,308 - Follows: 175 - Updated: 10/1/2006 - Published: 8/26/2006 - Minerva M., Dolores U. - Complete
Perfectly Abnormal by evansentranced reviews
Eight yearold Harry is ignored, treated as a servant, and generally detested by his so called family. Naturally, he's not about to take that lying down. Join Harry on his passive aggressive quest for revenge on a normal day in his perfectly abnormal world
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,141 - Reviews: 327 - Favs: 1,291 - Follows: 245 - Published: 5/7/2006 - Harry P., Petunia D. - Complete
Steve the Hufflepuff Death Eater by The-Caitiff reviews
Aka The Power the Dark Lord never saw coming. This is my final battle fic. Harry doesnt really care about Voldemort anymore, Voldemort has to deal with incompetant followers, and we all learn the truth about the Hufflepuff house.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,667 - Reviews: 64 - Favs: 194 - Follows: 40 - Published: 4/1/2006 - Voldemort, Harry P. - Complete
Wizard Down by Grant Larceny reviews
I just hacked Scholastic's servers and downloaded parts of book 7 that she has completed. This is a cut and paste of the final battle. Don't blame me for the results.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,025 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/31/2005 - Complete
The Marriage by Janara reviews
[Complete] At the start of Harry's seventh year Dumbledore has come up with the perfect way of ending the war. There is only one problem, Harry refuses to play the Headmaster's game. Will Harry be able to avoid the trap set by the aged wizard?
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,058 - Reviews: 484 - Favs: 1,391 - Follows: 289 - Published: 6/4/2005 - Complete
The Power The Dark Lord Knows Of by Finbar reviews
A very silly little one shot where Harry lets Voldemort know about the Power he isnt supposed to know about...
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,553 - Reviews: 335 - Favs: 828 - Follows: 168 - Published: 4/4/2005 - Harry P. - Complete
BajaB (52)