La Mouette Lunaire
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Joined 03-31-03, id: 363308, Profile Updated: 02-12-10
Author has written 18 stories for Misc. Movies, Legend of Zelda, Harry Potter, Resident Evil, Silent Hill, Spider-Man, Patriot, Naruto, and Left 4 Dead.

Fly me to the moon
And let me play among the stars

Charges

There is nothing interesting or worthwile to be said about the Mouette's personality. The Mouette's writing is largely humour (or her idea of it anyway) that has been lovingly decorated with violence, drama and thinly veiled pornography. The Mouette always appreciates constructive criticism, by which she means comments that actually give her tips on how to improve as opposed to just insult or vaguely nag about her stories. The Mouette also accepts thoroughly positive comments and large amounts of money. The Mouette usually greatly enjoys her work and hopes that perhaps you will too.

Prisoner's Diary

02/12/10 Oh look, here's another one! 'Don't tell the others', yet more L4D-related sexiness.
12/09/09 Nope, still not dead yet. 'Give it a shot' for the Left 4 Dead fandom is up.
12/06/08
Can you believe it? I actually revised 'Cheap', 'Ante Mortem' and 'A minor drawback'. Nothing huge, mind, but I hopefully got most language errors fixed in the process. Also there's a new link leading to my writing journal @ LJ in case you're in desperate need for more Mouette. THA!
05/10/08 That one Wesker/glasses request is FINALLY done in the form of 'Now go out and get yourself some big black frames'

Secret tunnel to other cells (Sssh!)

DeviantArt Because the Mouette-ism needs to be spread! Some of my ff.net stories plus a few graphics-related goodies.
MediaMiner Memories of the good old days in script. Featuring TTQFS and more.
Fictionpress.com A rare bit of original work every decade or so.
Lovely Muni Muni More worrying writings, now with added LJ flavour!

Criminal Record

Don't tell the others (complete) It was an idea I had for a drabble, except that 100 words just couldn't possibly contain all of the wonderful struggle for teamwhore!Nick, romantic ending included.
Give it a shot (complete) Nick, adrenaline and wait, is that supposed to happen? Give it a shot gives nownotreally!anonymous semi-pr0n writing a shot and was originally written as a kink meme prompt.
Now go out and get yourself some big black frames (complete) A small piece written for Chaed. It features shades and yet another AMAZING sequence in the lives of Albert Wesker and William Birkin.
Cheap
(complete) Is pretty much what it says on the tin and was written to a.) poke my nose into the Naruto ficdom and b.) prevent going insane from the lack of writing anything other than poetry analysisisisis- ohehmgeejustgetmeoutofhereARGH!! Ahem. Yes.
About leeches and lust (complete) More drama, more leeches and more ambiguous perversion. There goes another epic piece of 'OR IS IT?!' which features all the Birkin/Marcus your UC-obsessed brain needs. And there's a song, too!
Nothing left to lose (complete) Pure and simple boredom made me translate this piece of Billy Coen one-shot which I wrote as a part of my songfiction saga that was conceived in the spirit of being entirely silly and misleading. I like the words. They are pretty.
Mal Au Cœur : Chronicles of the Revolution (work in progress) My patience for 'Tavington softens up for the tough rebel chick from the future' fiction has finally snapped and is now on full 'I'll show ye buggers!' mode. You fancy being unreasonable? Fine! Let's get it on then! Translation: Random piece of 'the voices told me so' art. Written largely for my own entertainment.
A minor drawback (complete) I found the idea in a dark corner of my mind where it’s been lurking for quite some time now, having settled down there after discovering a couple of worrying similarities between a certain series and RE4. A DA contest finally dragged it out into the light to be read and judged by you, dearest reader.
The Worst Scenario Ever (on hold) And indeed it might be just that. A slightly mad Spider-Man adventure involving murals, insanity, chocolate, a mysterious cult and the joy of decoding. This is currently nothing but a cloud of worrying ideas in my mind but I hope that I will manage to trace something of a storyline sometime.
Because we found the rubber band (complete) When browsing the Spider-Man section for inspiration concerning my tribute to the series I was surprised at the quantity of Ock-angst. And knowing how annoying the voices in your head can get I drew my own conclusion and gave the subject a slightly different try.
Resident Gameshow (work in progress) Your semi-typical gameshow including the average self-insert, a jellyfish, Barry Burton's band and more stupidity than you can count on your nine fingers. Has its good moments and keeps me entertained well enough. Updating every once in a while.
Albert Wesker: Owner's Guide & Maintenance Manual (complete) I blame Theresa Green and the tequila for this one, but I just had to get something like that written. Now it's there and I'm still waiting for the fangirls to either worship me or rip my skin off and cover my bleeding body in salt. Both forms of critique are of course most welcome.
Ante Mortem (complete) Believe it or not, but it's Silent Hill and it's non-humor. A short take on what has to be the perfect start for a perfect romance between Eddie and Angela. Oh dear.
Mountains of Joyous Syrup (complete) Wesker plus Birkin plus syrup minus language skills equals Z0MG!11! Some of you might know my 'inspiration' for this piece of breakfast insanity. Those of you who don't: Just think of it as another temporary loss of brain activity!
House Elf Upgrade & The Chamber of Worse Secrets (complete) Adding 4 Harry Potter books to sleep deprivation and hereditary madness certainly isn't the best idea. The result presents itself in the form of those two short stories which are far from being a masterpiece but kept me entertained when writing them so I suppose there could be worse. They've been completed, more HP short stories are not to be expected anytime soon or anytime at all.
Midnight Invasion Y9 (complete) The original piece was written for a contest, task was to include a couple of phrases into a humorous piece of Zelda fanfiction. Script style, deleted, you know the deal. When I started writing again a few months later I abused this piece to practice prose by re-writing it and calling it MI Y9. It's still quite okay, quite random and quite complete.
Sharpe's Randomness (complete) If ever you should write a lengthy thesis about my literature which is of course as likely as the green alien on my couch getting laid, and trust me, he's not a ladies' extraterrestrial, really then this little piece of randomness will be of major significance. Not only does it switch to a entirely new genre but it also represents my change from prose to script. Other than that it's just a so-so one-shot which has been completed.
The Chronicles of Condo (on hold) Ganondorf, Zelda, Link and a flat. Your average disaster ensues in this piece of Hyrulian humor. Won't be updated until I get myself to appreciate my old number one fandom again.

Visiting hour's up. Please insert another cup of coffee or go home.

Greetings,
La Mouette Lunaire

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The Mario Gang's Wacky Vacation by N64 Chick reviews
Weird things can happen when Mario and the gang take a vacation.
Mario - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 35 - Words: 44,839 - Reviews: 53 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 8/1/2012 - Published: 2/10/2002 - Complete
Sweet Peanut by terabient reviews
An EPIC and MOVING tale of UNEXPECTED ROMANCE between a jaded con-artist and a...carnival mascot peanut? Chapter 3: Nick tries to ditch Lil Peanut, but Rochelle and Ellis have other ideas. Also, Coach is inspirational!
Left 4 Dead - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,444 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 4/28/2011 - Published: 2/2/2010 - Nick
The Substitutes by Burningbridges reviews
Ever wonder what would happen if RE characters were substituting for your school teachers? Just try to picture it. Yeah, didn't think you could.
Resident Evil - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 34 - Words: 75,099 - Reviews: 189 - Favs: 91 - Follows: 44 - Updated: 4/23/2011 - Published: 7/8/2006
One Mean Cat by Ace Bullets reviews
Inspired by the conversation about irrational fears in the Season 2 episode 'Clean Hands'. Ed has an encounter during a case that he's not likely to live down. Pre-series one-shot. Complete.
Flashpoint - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,495 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/2/2009 - Ed L. - Complete
Living Like A Disaster by Hello Captain and Shakahnna reviews
Possibly... no, definitely the best..no, the greatest Resident Evil fanfiction... no, infact it's better than canon...ever written. We are wonderful.
Resident Evil - Rated: T - English - Angst/Humor - Chapters: 54 - Words: 172,208 - Reviews: 509 - Favs: 60 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 1/8/2008 - Published: 6/21/2004 - Complete
The Mating Frenzy by MSkyDragons reviews
After the attacks by Orochimaru and the Sand, Konoha’s population is dangerously low. Desperate times call for extreme measures, and Tsunade issues a priority S class mission to every Leaf ninja: to pair off and start making babies!
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 33 - Words: 70,171 - Reviews: 7041 - Favs: 5,399 - Follows: 2,215 - Updated: 11/22/2007 - Published: 7/24/2006 - Naruto U. - Complete
A Touch of Lucius by We Didn't Start the Fire reviews
I DON'T suck at summaries. Oneshot. Parody of LMHG fics. NO pr0n. T for language. AU, post 7th year, compliant with nothing. SPOILER: Mpreg for comedic effect.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Parody/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,954 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/9/2006 - Hermione G., Lucius M. - Complete
Trial of Insanity by GaiaCleaver reviews
My first ED fic. The game never elaborated on how Max was sent to the asylum...so, in my own words, here's the trial that sent him there. Rated T for brief violence near the end.
Eternal Darkness - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,206 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 3 - Published: 9/9/2005 - Complete
I am Ashley by Panon reviews
What would happen if Luis had pretended to be Ashley?
Resident Evil - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 445 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/9/2005
Gimli and Boromir Strike Back by Dodendans reviews
Tired of being abused by Sues and their authors, Gimli and Boromir decide that for once they will get revenge. ON HOLD
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 21 - Words: 59,319 - Reviews: 412 - Favs: 116 - Follows: 27 - Updated: 2/7/2005 - Published: 12/30/2003 - Boromir, Gimli
Van Helsing: the Microwaveable Pop Tart Version by Yrch Monger reviews
A “slightly” abridged version of the film Van Helsing. In which Gabriel has the intelligence of a swallow, Anna turns into Mufasa, and Carl is unable to distinguish which movie he’s actually starring in.
Van Helsing - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,849 - Reviews: 111 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 4 - Published: 5/11/2004 - Complete
AntiStumpy's Anti Stumpy Society's The Patriot by Duchess of Inkling reviews
This is a revised and improved edition of The Patriot, as approved by Anti-Stumpy's Anti Stumpy Society, who produced this in their own studios at Wet and Weedy Productions. And no, don't take it too seriously.
Patriot - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,698 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 3 - Published: 3/26/2004
Game Over by Moczo reviews
Yami's cursed, Kaiba's deck has been stolen, Bakura becomes a sales executive... throw in TristanCorp and you've got yourself a story!
Yu-Gi-Oh - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 31 - Words: 47,849 - Reviews: 175 - Favs: 77 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 3/13/2004 - Published: 1/14/2003 - Complete
Witch Hunt! by Evilmini86 reviews
-Episode 8 is up-(The Prince and the Playa')- Saionji starts a witch hunt! Filled with weird randomness and lots of dirty Touga and Akio! Read this if you want to laugh so hard that you'll fall out of your chair and need medical assistance. READ!
Utena - Rated: T - English - Humor/Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 16,271 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 2/29/2004 - Published: 8/29/2003
The Cereal Killer by happy molecule reviews
Boromir develops a new fascination.....
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,340 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/29/2003 - Boromir, Arwen U.
The Raven by ThePet reviews
Not a novel...a poem, parodying 'The Raven' by Edgar A. Poe. I sincerely hope it's funny. With kudos to Spike Milligan.
Misc. Books - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,193 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 7 - Published: 2/16/2003
In Which the Author and the Musketeers Go Crazy by Perilous Mango Ninja reviews
See the title. I love making fun of stuff. I don't know why... It's just fun! Plus it makes people happy! So enjoy! Oh, and by the way, yes, I am crazy, and I am addicted to jellybeans and anything that contains sugar.
Alexandre Dumas - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,932 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 5 - Published: 9/24/2001
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Don't tell the others reviews
Fighting zombies was the easy part, now it's Rochelle versus Ellis, fighting over the man they both care for, much more than he deserves. How will they cope with their animosity and who will win Nick's heart in the end?
Left 4 Dead - Rated: T - English - Romance/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,572 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 4 - Published: 2/11/2010 - Complete
Give it a shot reviews
Trouble keeping up with other survivors? Don't worry, that's what our adrenaline injectors are for! Beware that in rare instances, side effects may occur. And in Nick's case, they definitely will.
Left 4 Dead - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,547 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 4 - Published: 12/8/2009 - Nick - Complete
Now go out and get yourself some big black frames reviews
Sometimes silence says more than a thousand words. And sometimes people feel that an additional story of 572 words is needed to get the point across.
Resident Evil - Rated: K - English - Hurt/Comfort/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 711 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/10/2008 - A. Wesker, W. Birkin - Complete
Cheap reviews
When dawn slowly creeps over the rooftops of the small village, sake and Tsunade can only lead to one thing. But will Shizune approve?
Naruto - Rated: K - English - Romance/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 595 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 8 - Published: 1/25/2008 - Tsunade S., Shizune - Complete
About leeches and lust reviews
The training facility at night can be a lonely place, especially when you are faced with the painful reminder that you are in fact not alone. Will the young Dr. Birkin find the courage to overcome his fear and confront what is causing him so much pain?
Resident Evil - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,058 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/19/2007 - W. Birkin, J. Marcus - Complete
Nothing left to lose reviews
What exactly happened to Billy Coen after Rebecca left him in the woods? Did he find his freedom? Face death? Imprisonment? Or something utterly worse?
Resident Evil - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 883 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/28/2007 - Billy C. - Complete
Mal Au Cœur : Chronicles of the Revolution reviews
Who would have thought that a certain sadistic Colonel's next mission involves escorting a beautiful princess safely back to camp? Well everyone, really. Act 2: The arrival at the sea. And female competition.
Patriot - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,236 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 12/17/2006 - Published: 12/5/2006
A minor drawback reviews
There are various ways of messing up a perfectly simply plan for world domination. And soon Osmund Saddler will find out the hard way that Ramon Salazar is not the only thing their fandoms have in common...
Resident Evil - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Suspense - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,382 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 3 - Published: 10/13/2006 - O. Saddler - Complete
HP and the Scrolls of Slightly Silly Stories reviews
Hogwards has faced and conquered threats of most threatening nature. Now it's time to face a new fear. Now it's time to face... something slightly silly. Current scrolls: The Chamber of Worse Secrets, House Elf Upgrade
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,681 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 8/30/2006 - Published: 12/30/2004 - Severus S., Lucius M. - Complete
The Worst Scenario Ever reviews
With New York and SpiderMan at peace, Peter Parker can finally start his new life as an aspiring mural artist. But not all of his friends share the newly found happiness and a mysterious photograph threatens to shatter the spider's paradise.
Spider-Man - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Suspense - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,916 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Published: 7/27/2006
Because we found the rubber band reviews
The aftermath of his actions has left Dr. Otto Octavius alias Doc Ock a broken man. But when reflecting on his past mistakes will he find that certain mechanical devices might actually add a whole new layer to his misery? Yes. Yes, he will.
Spider-Man - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,350 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 2 - Published: 7/24/2006 - Complete
Ante Mortem reviews
Two people, trapped in the hell of their past. One is as good as dead, the other on the way to her demise. But what if they had met? Could two so wrong make it right for each other? [oneshot, Angela & Eddie]
Silent Hill - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,490 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 7 - Published: 5/12/2006 - Complete
Resident Gameshow reviews
It's horrible, terrifying, worse than the whole RE series combined. It's... a game show! [Chapter 3: The Dating Game]
Resident Evil - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 3 - Words: 11,316 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 2/14/2006 - Published: 9/2/2005
Albert Wesker: Owner's Guide & Maintenance Manual reviews
In order to obtain top performance from your captain, please follow the procedures detailed in this manual.
Resident Evil - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,919 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 75 - Follows: 5 - Published: 2/3/2006 - A. Wesker - Complete
Mountains of Joyous Syrup reviews
Birkin finds a happyness and a breakfast. Romance like you've never read before... and never want to read again. one shot, done
Resident Evil - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 757 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 2 - Published: 1/21/2006 - A. Wesker, W. Birkin - Complete
The Chronicles of Condo reviews
What if the impossible was made possible? What if randomness and insanity had a name? What if this name was 37B? What if... Ganondorf, Link and Zelda would share a flat?
Legend of Zelda - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,360 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 5/28/2005 - Published: 11/13/2004
Midnight Invasion Y9 reviews
A quite short, quite random story about the horrors a princess has to endure once the Hylian clock strikes midnight... [done!]
Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,538 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 2 - Published: 10/31/2004 - Complete
Sharpe's Randomness reviews
[Sharpe Series] What happens when a bored author is allowed to write a short fiction about the random life of not so random soldiers? I'm not sure, but it probably involves the apocalypse, random songs and ... insanity. [done]
Misc. Movies - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,372 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 3 - Published: 8/6/2004 - Complete