Poll: Do you enjoy Sevmione? Vote Now!
Hey everyone, it's KT Osbourne. For those of you new to my profile, and think I may have reviewed on your story, I was anonymously ILuvPeetaMellark (aka KT) and if you have written a Sevmione story here, I have probably reviewed on it.
The Hunger Games, Harry Potter, WARREN/LAYLA (Sky High), Paramore, MCR, Green Day, Lady GaGa, rainy days, Sevmione, unicorns, emo-ness (in a good way, bitches), twitter (I'm @DaSnakeOnFire), the word 'bitch' (it's fucking in my pen name!), cutters, sometimes self-injury (but only when I do it), nevershoutnever!, and... I will keep updating this...XP
When Remus J. Lupin rules the world all problems will be solved with chocolate. (No freaking DUH!)
When Sirius O. Black rules the world, all problems will be solved with sex. (Is it not true?)
When James Potter rules the world, all problems will be solved either by pranks or Lily Evans. (*laugh my arse off*)
When Peter Pettigrew rules the world, pigs will sprout wings, and all problems will be solved by Lord Voldemort. :D
Hermione can't draw. Lupin can't sing. But, damn, Tom Felton can RAP! (Thank you, YouTube! Peoples, you seriously need to check out Feltbeats!!!)
I learned Parseltongue for my foreign language course.
I will never ask Harry if his scar senses are tingling.
I will not scream lumos at the light switch... again.
I will not, under any circumstances, ask Harry Potter who died and made him boss.
I will not bring a fortune cookie/magic 8 ball to divination class (for extra credit).
I will not jump up in the middle of an Order or DA meeting (spy for the Dark Lord) and yell "Voldemort, run!"
If you are so obsessed with Harry Potter that it is NOT even funny anymore, copy this into your profile
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.
If your friends are considering torturing you to stop you talking about a fictional character, copy and paste this onto your profile
If you are in love with a fictional character, copy and paste this onto your profile. (I love you, Draco!)
DON'T GO HATING SLYTHERINS!
SEVERUS SNAPE IS GOOD! I STAND BY MY GREASY POTIONS MASTER! POST THIS IN YOUR PROFILE AND SPREAD THE TRUTH! (he really isn't all that greasy...)
"perhaps this explains my strong attraction to Malfoy: he's the carbon copy of Severus Snape.
Don't look at me like that.
As far as I'm concerned, the Hogwarts Potions Master is a brooding, misunderstood artist, for potions making is indeed an art.
I can't stand people hating on Snape. He is a genius. He is brilliant, insightful, with his own brand of deliciously dark humor, and furthermore he is hot, and his hair's not that greasy, anyway."
(Thank you, Rowan-Greenleaf. People, you need check out her story, Il Dragone! And everything else she's written! And, yeah, Severus is my uncle. Ever heard of incest?)
If your friends are WEIRD (But not as weird as you, cuz I be screwed) put this on your profile.
If you think that being unique is better than being cool then put this on your profile. (FUCK YEAH!)
If you think that MCR absolutely ROCKS, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you spend multiple hours each day reading and/or writing, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you think that writing or reading Fanfiction stories is fun, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you know someone who should be run over by a bus, copy and paste this to your profile.
If someone has ever said something to you that had nothing to do with your current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.
Perfection is a waste of time.
If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.
If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.
If Fanfiction is your way of escaping reality and the rest of the boring people in the world and truly "unleashing your imagination" then paste this in your profile and add your name: Emerald Princess 14, StardustFromThePlanetGallifrey, NarnianLady, KingdomHeartsNerd, TohruROX2221, Slytherin Queen 1.03, SailorGirl3, Arianna Ariadnee Malfoy
If fanfiction is to you what myspace is to other people, copy and paste this in to your profile.
I love Potter Puppet Pals!
You know something sad? I know more about Harry Potter than Greek Mythology, and I love Greek Mythology.
You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it.
God created boys before girls because every true artist creates a rough draft before a masterpiece.
Education is important, school however, is another matter.
Evening News is where they begin with "Good Evening" then proceed to tell you why it isn't
You laugh because I'm different. I laugh because you are all the same.
I'm not afraid of death. What's it going to do? Kill me?
In 2004, David Bowie thought he was being stalked by someone dressed as a giant pink rabbit. Bowie noticed the fan at several concerts, but he became alarmed when he got on a plane and the bunny was on board
The state of Maryland has no natural lakes
Tom Hanks is a descendant of Abraham Lincoln
The murmur of a crowd in a film is recreated by having several people say "walla, walla, walla, walla"
Two former Marlboro Men have died of lung cancer
A series of random non-alphabet characters used to denote swearing (#$%&?) is known as a "grawlix"
1% of the American population is in jail
The U.S. government spent $277,000 to research pickles in 1993
(Yes, I AM really that weird.)
"Both Rowling and Meyer, they're speaking directly to young people. … The real difference is that Jo Rowling is a terrific writer and Stephenie Meyer can't write worth a darn. She's not very good."-Stephen King. No, I'm not kidding!
"Harry Potter is about confronting fears, finding inner strength and doing what is right in the face of adversity. Twilight is about how important it is to have a boyfriend."-Stephen King. Again.
Why is Cinderella a fairy tale? Any idiot can lose a shoe!
If you believe some teachers are seriously prejudiced, copy an paste this in your profile.
89 percent of guys want YOU to make the first move.
'I used to have superpowers, but my therapist took them away'
'you're just jealous because the voices only talk to me'
If Joe Jonas (or any Jonas Brother) dies
95% of people would go nuts if Edward Cullen jumped off a building.
If you think High School Musical is evil,and brainwashes little kids,copy and paste this in your profile.
If you have ever tripped over a pillow, copy this into your profile.
If you have stared at your computer for a complete hour copying and pasting copy and paste its into your profile copy and paste this into your profile.
If you absolutely LOVE to sing even though you may or may not suck copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you dare to say the Dark Lord's name, copy and paste this into your profile. (VOLDEMORT!!! Sorry, I promised I wouldn't do that anymore...)
If you are a serial killer, GET THE HECK AWAY FROM ME. If you are a cereal killer, GET THE HECK AWAY FROM MY CHEERIOS.
Continue the High School Musical Sucks Train! Add your name! Stephanie Pascal, x Rajah x, sundrynotes, theheartyearns, Hopeless-EO-Shipper, Phish Tacko, Slytherin Queen 1.30, SailorGirl3, Arianna Ariadnee Malfoy
~STOP STEREOTYPES! IF YOU HATE STEREOTPYES AND WANT THEM TO STOP, COPY THIS LIST INTO YOUR PROFILE!
Continue the I Love Draco Malfoy Train! Add your name! (Cuz mine looks lonely!) Arianna Ariadnee Malfoy
Did you know Sarcasm is your body’s natural defense against stupidity?
You do realize that if you've read this far, you've given me brief control of your mind. You shall never be the same. Mwaha!
If you or your best friend is insane, copy this into your profile.
If you're quiet a lot but you're ALSO really loud, copy this into your profile.
No I won't go to hell! It has a restraining order against me.
This is Kitty. Copy and paste Kitty into your
Paste the bunny on your profile and join the dark side!
ACTUAL PRODUCT LABELS THAT SCARE ME:
On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (But that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)
On a bag of Fritos! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special?)
On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how?...)
On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion).
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought?...)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?)
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and.. .I'm taking this because?...)
On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?)
On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)
On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands." (...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
A Korean kitchen knife: Keep out of children (this is either a minor translation mistake or Koreans have more issues than we originally thought)
-Hello and welcome to the Mental Health Hot-line. If you are obsessive compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent ask someone to press 2 for you. If you have multiple personalities press 3, 4, 5, 6. If you are paranoid, we know what you are and what you want so stay on the line and we'll trace your call. If you are delusional press 7 and your call will be sent to the Mother Ship. If you are schizophrenic listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press. If you are depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, no one will answer you. If you are dyslexic press 6, 9, 6, 9, 6, 9. If you have a nervous disorder fidget with the hatch key until the beep. After the beep, please wait for the beep. If you have short term memory loss, please try your call again later and if you have low self esteem, hang up; all our operators are too busy to talk to you.
Dumbledore has an army, so does Snape, it consists of me, myself and I.
If you would cause a could-be world apocalypse just to see Justin Bieber dead, copy this into your profile!
When life gives you Edward Cullen, smile evilly and go to your stash of weapons.
When life gives you Edward Cullen, throw him back and demand someone cooler (like your ex-boyfriend, perhaps?)
Only the preps don't like Lady Gaga.
A fail so epic, it's almost a win.
Justin Bieber...epic fail.
Twilight: such a fail...
my friends...awesomer than penguins...and penguins...they're awesome...
Do I dazzle you? no, you make me want to barf.
I'm sarcastic, what's your superpower?
Dear Justin Bieber, please stop singing, it makes my ears bleed.
Dora is only teaching kids to be stupid, I mean, c'mon, any normal kid could see the giant mountain that is RIGHT. THERE. BEHIND THEM!!!!
We get it. You're the map. Why don't you say it again in case we didn't hear you?!?!?!?!
Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life. So why am I still in jail?
Help I've fallen and i can’t...hey nice carpet!
Whoever said nothings impossible never tried to nail jell-o to a tree!
"If you can't laugh at yourself make fun of other people".
"Flying is simple. You just throw yourself at the ground and miss."
I agree with the dictionary. Girls before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love.
If you have ever heard the voices of the characters of the book you're reading in your head...copy/paste this into your profile. (Have ever? They talk to me every day! X3)
To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity
1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.
4. When caught sleeping at school/work/wherever you are not supposed to be sleeping, and you are woken up, shout, "AMEN!"
5.Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.
6.In the Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write For Marijuana
7.Finish All Your sentences with 'In Accordance With The Prophecy'.
9. Skip down the hall Rather Than Walk and see how many looks you get.
10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
11.Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is 'To Go'.
12. Sing Along At The Opera.
14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and Play tropical Sounds All Day.
15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You have a headache.
17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream'I Won! I Won!'
18. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Parking lot, Yelling 'Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!'
19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner,'Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.'
20 And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity .
Copy and Paste this To Make People who read bios Smile.
WAYS TO ANNOY ANY TWILIGHT FAN (...Now I'm kinda a bit of a Twilight fan...)
1. Steal their copy of Twilight and replace it with one of your Harry Potter books in a Twilight dust jacket. (Pleasant suprise)
2. Tell them that Edward is a "hand-me-down" because the Twilight movies got him after the Harry Potter movies were finished with him. (I know!)
3. List other "hand-me-downs" from the books, like the last names of Black and Clearwater... (Vampires, shape-shifters... you get the picture. When I was reading Twilight, I just kept thinking of what they took from HP.)
4. State that you think Edward would be hotter if he had a lightning scar on his forehead. (Never!)
5. "Accidentally" call Edward, Sanguini. (you remember him, book 6, big party...anyone? ANYONE????
6. Explain in detail how any wizard can possess all the gifts (seeing the future, reading minds, etc.), that a vampire would only have one of. (... Wizards are pretty awesome)
7. Whenever they mention Jacob Black, innocently ask if they meant Stubby Boardman.
8. Say that Bella and Filch would make a cute couple. (I've always thought that... well, Bella from the movies, yeah)
9. Flinch whenever they say "Edward" and tell them to say "You-Know-Who."
10. Whenever they describe the vampires of the Twilight series (sparkly skin, no fangs, etc.), contradict them, and tell them what "real" vampires, out of Harry Potter, are like.
11. Explain how Twilight werewolves are really Animagi, and ask whether they've registered with the Ministry.
If your profile is longer than the chapters of most of your stories copy and paste this to your profile.
Can you tell what this is...
Draco dormiens nunquam titillandus?
Cuz I do.
The Hogwarts Motto is (by english translation) A Sleeping Dragon Must Never be Tickled
3 guys walk into a bar, preferably the Hog's Head.
Seamus says "I have got the smallest arm in the world"
Ron says, "I have the smallest head in the world"
Harry says, "I have got the smallest dick in the world"
The 3 guys go to the Guinness World Records
Seamus comes back and says "I really do have the smallest arm in the world"
Ron comes back and says "Amazing, I do have the smallest head in the world"
Harry comes back angry " Who the F*CK is JUSTIN BIEBER?????"
I love my music!
Lady GaGa told me to be proud of who I am
Ke$ha told me glitter and partying is everything
Bruno Mars taught me you can make millions about a song about lying on a couch
Taylor Swift taught me to whine creatively about a heartbreak
Avril Lavigne told me to smile, and cuss while doing it,
but the most important thing is...
Rebecca Black taught me the days of the week!!
Things Rick Riordan Taught Me:
Even cat goddesses like growling at birds.
Underwater kisses are way better than normal ones.
The five elements are earth, air, fire, water, and cheese.
Children of rival gods can fall in love.
No one really knows why the Egyptians wrote without vowels.
Nemean lions can be defeated with freeze dried ice cream.
Eating fruit bats is bad for your health.
Contrary to popular belief, hellhounds can be domesticated.
The Set animal does not appreciate being named Leroy.
Yes, that twelve year old wearing a silver jacket is a goddess.
Jackal headed gods can be attractive.
Math teachers really are evil.
Set's secret name is Evil Day. (Use this to your advantage...)
It's not easy to insult a daughter of Athena.
Elvis was a magician. No, really.
Do not trust the bald man who wants to sell you a water bed.
Hieroglyphics are fun to read.
A god of toilet paper can actualy be really cool.
Demons will give you free samples if you ask nicely.
If you hear a voice in your head, you're not crazy - you just have an uber-powerful god living inside you.
If you can read this message, you are blessed because over two billion people in the world cannot read at all:
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty
uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal
pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a
rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't
mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the
olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer
be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl
mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.
Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed
ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.
Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling
was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!
If you could read that put it in your profile!
Only the foolish try to impart wisdom, trying to look wise-
If at first you don’t succeed, don’t go sky diving.
If you see someone who is on the ground, hurt and bleeding, don’t go up and ask “Are you Ok?” OF COURSE THEY ARE NOT OK! What you should be doing is calling an ambulance. CALL NOT TEXT!
Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They're about to announce the lottery numbers. - Homer Simpson
Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the world together. - Adam Savage [Mythbusters]
Boys are like slinkies; practically useless, and yet it is SO amusing to watch them fall down the stairs!!
Boys are like trees - they take 50yrs to grow up.
Excuse me. Have you seen my mind? I think I've lost it...
My mind works like lightning...one flash and then it's gone.
Growing old is mandatory, but growing up is optional
Keep smiling, it makes people wonder what you're up to. – Anon.
'When life hand you lemons, squirt them in people's eyes!'
"Before you insult someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you do insult them, you are a mile away and you have their shoes." – Anon.
"Friends are God’s apology for relatives.” – Anon.
Rules are like paperclips. Meant to hold things together, fun to bend, and easy to twist out of shape.
A simple friend wonders about your romantic history. A real friend could blackmail you with it.
A good friend will comfort you when he rejects you. A best friend will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?" (Thank you, Haydn. Btw, I'm over Xander. *happy dance*)
He: Why do you wear a Bra if you've got nothing to fill it in?
He: Is this seat empty?
He: Can I invite you a drink?
He: Can I have this song?
He: Your body is like a temple.
He: Where were you all my life?
He: What would you say if I asked you to marry me?
You say Twilight
(And I don't fucking mean Cissa Malfoy, bitch.)