MusicalAngel499
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Joined 02-08-12, id: 3708382, Profile Updated: 10-08-13
Author has written 2 stories for Maximum Ride.

People of this world (and other worlds): I am here!!!!

ATTENTION FOR ALL THE PEOPLE WHO ARE PISSED OFF AT ME FOR REMOVING FAME, IT IS CURRENTLY BEING REWRITTEN FOR ALL OF YOU.

Here is a link to Shadow-Teh-Ninja's story on wattpad, she has Rain in it-

Name: Red, just Red.

Gender: Sexist (I'm a girl)!

Hair color: Dishwater blonde with copper and gold streaks, all natural

Eye color: green with grey flecks, it gets lighter in the right light

Fav color: Black, dark green and deep purple

Fav sib: My big bro Fight 4 Randomness!

Fav song: ? too many! PM me if you care

Dear People Who Say Nothing Is Imposible

Try to get me to walk in a straight line without falling, tripping, and/or getting hurt

Sincerely,

Red


-Your weakness (Fatal Flaw): Um I don’t know, swearing.
-Your fears: needles, death, school, cages, Death Valley, sour milk.
-Your perfect pizza:
Cheese. Just cheese.
-Goal you would like to achieve this year: Something that involves a pony, cheese and an esophagus.
-Most over Used phrase in an instant message:
?
-Thoughts when first waking up:
-sobs- No! I wanna go back to sleep!
-Your best physical feature: I don’t think I’m pretty
-Your bedtime: Don’t really have one
-Mc Donald's or Burger King:
Don't both of their food have horse in it.
-Chocolate or Vanilla:
MINT CHOCOLATE CHIP
-Do you smoke:
you wish
-Will you smoke:
look up
-Do you swear:
sadly
-Do you sing:
In the shower, and everywhere else.
-Do you shower daily:
Crap.
-Do you behave yourself:
...
-Do you get motion sickness:
No
-Do you think you’re attractive:
Nope.
-Are you a health freak:
Nope.
-Do you get along with your parents:
...
-Do you like thunderstorms:
YAY! ITS HURRICANE SEASON!
-Do you play an instrument:
piano and my vocal chords.
-In the past month have you drink alcohol:
No.
-In the past month, have you gone to the mall:
I hate malls. unless they have bookstores and free wifi.
-In the past month have you eaten sushi:
NO
-What do you want to be when you grow up:
A person that gets free money. Or an author.
-What country do you want to visit the most:
Um... THE USA. Even though I live here...
-Number of CD's I own:
1
-Fav music:
Rock, some pop, and some others
-What do your feet smell like:
Are you asking me to smell my feet?
-What does your hair smell like:
Are you asking me to smell my HAIR!?
-Can you clap with your feet:
Why yes, yes I can.
-Have you seen purple clouds:
... I don't feel like answering that
-If you had 10 Mountain Dews, what would you be like:
*Shudder*
-When you think of the words "George Bush", what comes to your mind?
WHY IS GEORGE IN A BUSH!?

What I Would Like To Be When I Grow Up: An author

More (random) things about me:

Iggy or Fang: Fang ALL THE WAY XP

Black or Pink: Black

Skirt or Jeans: Jeans

Rock or Rap: Rock

Deep voice or High voice: deep voice

Dog or Cat: Dog :)

Tomboy or Girly girl: Tomboy

Hair/Hair Color: dirty blonde with weird copper and brown streaking through it.

Eye Color: they’re green with the orange star burst around the pupil.

Skin Color: TAN SKIN

I usually wear: black long sleeve jeans with a silver chain on the right side, combat boots and my brothers Doors hat.

Favorite Color(s): Black, Dark Green.

What my wings would look like if I was in Maximum Ride: Black at the base of each wing, they would get lighter until they were almost white at the tips.

What district I would be in if I was in the Hunger Games: 6, 10, or 12

Favorite Pairings: Fax (Fang and Max- from Maximum Ride), Niggy (Nudge and Iggy-from Maximum Ride),

What I'm labeled as: tomboy, a freak, antisocial

Favorite Books:
Maximum Ride, James Patterson
The Hunger Games, Suzan Collins (did I spell that right?)

Favorite Anime: CLANNAD!


TRUE STORYAnonymous, 'cause I'm too lazy to look up who started it.

A teenage girl about 17 named Diane had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away.

As she walked along under the tall elm trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely.

The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her." (Added by Fight 4 Randomness: GO ANGELS!!!!!) Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 98% of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93% of the people that read this won't repost it?

If you believe in Jesus Christ, put this in your profile and don't just ignore this, because the in the Bible it says if you deny me, I will deny you in front of my Father in the gates of Heaven.

†††
97% of you won't post this. When
Jesus died on the cross he was
thinking of you. If you're one of 3% that
cares, put this on your profile.
†††

Month one

Mommy
I am only 8 inches long
but I have all my organs.
I love the sound of your voice.
Every time I hear it
I wave my arms and legs.
The sound of your heart beat
is my favorite lullaby.

Month Two

Mommy
today I learned how to suck my thumb.
If you could see me
you could definitely tell that I am a baby.
I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though.
It is so nice and warm in here.

Month Three

You know what Mommy
I'm a boy!
I hope that makes you happy.
I always want you to be happy.
I don't like it when you cry.
You sound so sad.
It makes me sad too
and I cry with you even though
you can't hear me.

Month Four

Mommy
my hair is starting to grow.
It is very short and fine
but I will have a lot of it.
I spend a lot of my time exercising.
I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes
and stretch my arms and legs.
I am becoming quite good at it too.

Month Five

You went to the doctor today.
Mommy, he lied to you.
He said that I'm not a baby.
I am a baby Mommy, your baby.
I think and feel.
Mommy, what's abortion?

Month Six

I can hear that doctor again.
I don't like him.
He seems cold and heartless.
Something is intruding my home.
The doctor called it a needle.
Mommy what is it? It burns!
Please make him stop!
I can't get away from it!
Mommy! HELP me!

Month Seven

Mommy
I am okay.
I am in Jesus's arms.
He is holding me.
He told me about abortion.
Why didn't you want me Mommy?

Every Abortion Is Just . . .

One more heart that was stopped.
Two more eyes that will never see.
Two more hands that will never touch.
Two more legs that will never run.
One more mouth that will never speak.

If you're against abortion, re-post this and if you almost cried post this in your profile

My name is Sarah
I am but three,
My eyes are swollen
I cannot see,

I must be stupid
I must be bad,
What else could have made
My daddy so mad?

I wish I were better
I wish I weren't ugly,
Then maybe my mommy
Would still want to hug me.

I can't speak at all
I can't do a wrong
Or else I'm locked up
All the day long.

When I awake
I'm all alone
The house is dark
My folks aren't home

When my mommy does come
I'll try and be nice,
So maybe I'll get just
One whipping tonight.

Don't make a sound!
I just heard a car
My daddy is back
From Charlie's Bar.

I hear him curse
My name he calls
I press myself
Against the wall

I try and hide
From his evil eyes
I'm so afraid now
I'm starting to cry

He finds me weeping
He shouts ugly words,
He says its my fault
That he suffers at work.

He slaps me and hits me
And yells at me more,
I finally get free
And I run for the door.

He's already locked it
And I start to bawl,
He takes me and throws me
Against the hard wall.

I fall to the floor
With my bones nearly broken,
And my daddy continues
With more bad words spoken.

"I'm sorry!", I scream
But its now much too late
His face has been twisted
Into unimaginable hate

The hurt and the pain
Again and again
Oh please God, have mercy!
Oh please let it end!

And he finally stops
And heads for the door,
While I lay there motionless
Sprawled on the floor

My name is Sarah
And I am but three,
Tonight my daddy
Murdered me.

Disclaimer: I didn't make this poem but if you are against child abuse, put this on your profile and pass it on.

this thing looks fun so i'll try it

1.Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 81, Line 4.

I clenched my teeth and pulled my shoulders back “No, normal people do dissection labs. And we’re normal people, remember?” – Max, Nevermore

2. Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What can you touch?

The curtain in my living room. *just barley*

3.What is the last thing you watched on TV?
Sponge bob square pants.

4.Without looking, guess what time it is.
11:00 am

5. Now look at the clock. What is the actual time?
11:23 am- SO CLOSE!!!

6. From the exception of the computer, what else can you hear?
My brother screaming like a girl about not getting what he wants.

7. When did you last step outside? What were you doing?
This morning to feed my chickens.

8.Before you started this survey what did you look at?

Someone’s profile to see if there’s anything to copy and paste.

9. What are you wearing?
tinker bell black tank top and shorts (my pajamas)

10. Did you dream last night?
I can't remember...

11. When did you last laugh?
Like, 20 minutes ago XD

12. What is on the walls of the room you are in?

Mirror, couch, light switch, light

13.Seen anything weird lately?
My brother walking outside on the roof in his boxers at 2:00 Am (we were playing truth or dare)

14. What do you think of this quiz?
Funny- but weird.

15. What is the last film you saw?
The Secret of Moonacre.

16. If you became a multi-millionaire overnight. What would you buy?
EVERYTHING!?!?! Who wouldn't?

17. Tell me something about you that I don't know.
I'm a tomboy.

18. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?
I would change child abuse.

19. Do you like to dance?
I can only do coordinated dances, I can not, repeat con not free style.

20. George Bush:
I do live in the USA, but I don't really listen in Social Studies...

21. Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?
Angel or Emma.

22. Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?
David or Jeff

92 percent of teenagers would die if Justin Bebier told them it wasn't cool to breathe. Put this in your profile if you would be part of the 8 percent laughing your butt off

If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile

If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile.

If you think Fang is hot...copy and paste this on your profile.

If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you've ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.

If you've ever tried to put your hair behind your ears and ended up poking yourself in the eye, copy this into your profile

If you've ever had a guy try to put your hair behind your ears and he ended up poking you in the eye, copy this into your profile

Boys say that in everything they do, they can kick a girl's butt so bad that they cry. If you're a girl who kicks the boys' butts so bad they cry like girls, copy this into your profile

If you've ever done homework, were reading a story on fanfiction, were writing a story for fanfiction, were talking to a friend, and were watching TV at the same time, copy and paste this into your profile

Cervical cancer is actually caused by a virus know as Human Papalonia Virus (HPV). Millions of women around the world already have this virus. Spread your knowledge and post this in your profile.

If whenever you don't want to do something, the first thing you do is touch your nose and yell NOSE GOES! then copy and paste this onto your profile

If you have your own personal bubble space copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have sudden mood changes out of nowhere copy and paste this into your profile.

There is nothing wrong with any religion, race, or gender. If you believe in tolerance towards all people copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever had a crush on a fictional character copy and paste this on your profile.

If you think ‘rock, paper, scissors’ or ‘bubble gum bubble gum in a dish’ solves allot of problems then put this in you’re profile.

If you are in lala land most of the time copy this into your profile.

If you've ever busted a move/burst into song randomly, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've hit teenage years and are tending to be a bit rebellious... Well, girl(or boy), copy this into your profile.

If you have ever spent too much money at Barnes and Noble/Borders, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you ever sang the "I know a song that gets on everybody’s nerves" song copy and paste this into your profile

-I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling was ipmorantt! Tahts so cool! If you could read that copy and past this into you profile!

(\_/) This is bunny. Copy and paste
('.') bunny onto your page to help
(")_(") him gain world domination!

If you support Jack Sparrow and his jar of dirt, copy and paste this to your profile. (I got a jar of dir-rt, I got a jar of dir-rt, and guess what's inside it!)

What A boyfriend SHOULD do:

When she walks away from you mad
Follow her

When she stares at your mouth
Kiss her

When she pushes you or hits you
Grab her and don't let go

When she starts cussing at you
Kiss her and tell her you love her

When she's quiet
Ask her what’s wrong

When she ignores you
Give her your attention

When she pulls away
Pull her back

When you see her at her worst
Tell her she's beautiful

When you see her start crying
Just hold her and don't say a word

When you see her walking
Sneak up and hug her waist from behind

When she's scared
Protect her

When she lays her head on your shoulder
Tilt her head up and kiss her

When she steals your favorite hat
Let her keep it and sleep with it for a night

When she teases you
Tease her back and make her laugh

When she doesn't answer for a long time
Reassure her that everything is okay

When she looks at you with doubt
Back yourself up

When she says that she likes you
she really does more than you could understand

When she grabs at your hands
Hold hers and play with her fingers

When she bumps into you
bump into her back and make her laugh

When she tells you a secret
keep it safe and untold

When she looks at you in your eyes
don't look away until she does

When she misses you
she's hurting inside

When you break her heart
the pain never really goes away

When she says its over
she still wants you to be hers

When she repost this bulletin
she wants you to read it -

Stay on the phone with her even if she's not saying anything.-

When she says she's ok don't believe it, talk with her- because 10 yrs later she'll remember you-

Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her-

Treat her like she's all that matters to you.-

Tease her and let her tease you back.-

Stay up all night with her when she's sick.-

Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think it’s stupid.-

Give her the world.-

Let her wear your clothes.-

When she's bored and sad, hang out with her.-

Let her know she's important.-

Kiss her in the pouring rain.-

When she runs up to you crying, the first thing you say is;
"Who's butt am I kicking?"

If you do post this in the next four minutes the one you love will :
Call you.
Kiss you.
Love you.

Text you.


92 percent of American teens would die if Fang told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy this in your profile if you would be the 8 percent that would tell Fang to get over himself and then shove him back in your basement where he belongs. Then, you would resurrect the 92 percent of overzealous fangirls and use them as your zombie army to take over Canada and rename it Canadia where you would rule as Queen with Fang by your side as your extremely hot king who has no real political power except to stand there and make you look good.


=.= And here's bunny's assistent Mr. Whiskers the Cat!!! HELP HIM TAKE OVER THE WORLD!!! XD

(.• (.•
.•) .•)
(.• (.•
c a n c e r • i s n ' t • f a i r
Pass the ribbon around if you know someone who's died from, survived, or is living with cancer.

Too many lies and broken hearts
Too many scars and stupid false starts
No one, even you, can take away this pain
I'll burn you up like acid rain

I hate the banners of pink and white
I hate the glow of love's pure light
I hate seeing couples hug and kiss
In their own delusional fragmented bliss

I am like a blade, sharp and ready to cut
I'll tear your heart out and leave you down in a rut

So if you want to date me, this I will tell:
You can just go fuck off and burn in hell
I hate you all, so I mean this when I say:
I hope you get killed on Valentine’s day

By RedwoodAngel, repost this if you think Valentine's day is a sham

FRIENDS :VS: BEST FRIENDS

A friend will comfort you when he rejects you, Best Friend well go up to him and say "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"

A friend will be there for you when he dumps you, Best Friend will call him and whisper "Seven days..."

A friend will help you up when you fall, Best Friend will laugh because she tripped me.

A friend helps you find you're prince charming; Best Friend kidnaps him and brings him to you.

A friend gives you there umbrella in the rain; Best Friend takes yours and runs away.

A friend helps you move, Best Friend helps you move the bodies

A friend well bail you out of jail, Best Friend is sitting next to you saying "That was Awesome!! Let’s do it again!!"

A friend knows a lot of things about you; Best Friend could right a very embarrassing biography of your live.

A friend will teach me how to drive; Best Friend will help me push the car in the lake so I can collect insurance.

A friend will go to the concert with me; Best Friend will kidnap the band with me.

A friend will let me make a fool of myself in public, Best Friend is making a fool of herself next to me.

A friend asks you for something to eat; a Best Friend is the reason you have no food. (I'm the reason my house has no food.)

A friend hates your ex-boyfriend; Best Friends flirt with him just to annoy you.

A friend will push you in a spinny chair; Best Friend steals the chair sits in it and demands you to spin them.

A friend asks for the cookie, Best friend steals the bag and says PLEASE?

A friend asks for the cookie, A best friend gives me the puppy dog look, holds out her hand and says "Insert cookie here!"(LOVE YOU CARE-BEAR BUT NO YOU CANT HAVE MY COOKIE)

A friend laughs with you; Best friend laughs at you.

A friend says I love your dogs; Best friends are secretly plotting on how to steal them.

A friend will hide you from the cops;Best Friend is the reason their after you

Friends Fade, Best Friends are forever.

My best friend is insane, if you agree or if you have an insane friend than copy this to your profile.

Life isn't passing me by, it's trying to run me over.

Was that an earthquake, or did I just rock your world?

My knight in shining armour turned out to be a loser in aluminum foil.

Don't hate yourself in the morning-sleep till noon.

Therapist = The/rapist... scary thought

You laugh now because you're older than me by mere months, but when you're 30 and I'm still 29, who will be laughing then?

I live in a world full of bunnies and unicorns...but the bunnies are cutting themselves and the unicorns are acting all emo again

You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it.

When I am at Hogwarts I will not: Ask Harry if his scar senses are tingling

When I am at Hogwarts I will not sing: "I'm Off to See the Wizard" when sent to the Headmasters office.

I was gifted, but the psychiatrist took away my powers.

Officer, I swear to Drunk I'm not God!

Come to the dark side. We have COOKIES!

Life was so simple when boys had cooties

I make the cowardly lion look like the terminator!

I used to be normal, until I met the freaks that I call my friends

Boys are like slinkeys, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs.

I ran with scissors, and lived!

You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder

I'm the kind of person who will burst out laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.

AFergie taught me how to spell delicious and glamorious. But not so much tastey!

When it rains on my party, I bust out the slip n' slide.

I agree with the dictionary. girls before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love.

I don't obsess! I think intensely.

All the good ones are either gay, married, or fictional characters in books or movies.

We fall for stupid boys we make lots of dumb mistakes we like to act stupid, talk really fast, and laugh really loud. But us teenage girls, we're really going at one thing, staying strong.

Right now I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time. I think I've forgotten this before.

There are three kinds of people in the world; ones that can count and ones that can't count.

I'm right 90 percent of the time, so why worry about the other 3?

I only have PMS on days that end in the letter "y".

I am on a quest to the deepest, darkest corners of my room in search of what some would call "a floor" - a long and difficult task awaits me. Wish me luck my friends for I may not return alive.

They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people.

It takes 42 muscles to frown,28 muscles to smile,but only 4 muscles to reach out and slap someone.

"Doctors say I have multiple personalties. We disagree with that."

"When life gives you lemons, make apple juice, then laugh while people try to figure out what the hell you did."

"When life gives you lemons, chuck them at the people you hate."

"It doesn't matter whether the glass is half empty or half full, just drink it and get it over with."

"I'm not afraid of Death. What's he gonna do,kill me?"

" Life isn't about how many breathes you take, It's about how many moments that take your breath away"

"One day your life will flash before your eyes, so make sure that it's worth watching."

Put this in your profile if you know a person or two who needs to get squished by a bus... or Tyler Crowley's van

Duct tape is like the force, it has a light side and a dark side and it holds the universe together."

"Just because I'm cute doesn't mean im nice."

"Education is important, school however, is another matter."

"Don’t mess with me I've got a stick."

"Boys are like purses: cute, full of crap, and always replaceable."

"Boys are like skateboards, they can go fast but usually there pretty slow."

"Boys are like knives, useful but they'll cut you eventually."

"If at first you don't succeed, don't try skydiving."

"I called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse."

"Evening News is where they begin with "Good Evening" then proceed to tell you why it isn't."

"I can only please on person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow's not looking good, either."

"1 out of every 4 people are insane. Look at your three best friends, if it's not them, it's you."

"Don't follow in my footsteps, I tend to walk into walls."

"Men are like parking spots, the good ones are taken and the free ones are handicapped."

"There are no stupid questions, just stupid people."

"What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere? 'Hold my purse.'"

"He Said: I don't know why you wear a bra, you have nothing to put in it. She Said: You wear pants don't you?"

"Don’t knock on death’s door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that."

"Heaven doesn't want me and Hell is afraid I'll take over."

"You know your addicted when Volterra is added to your computer dictionary."

"I'm the kind of girl who falls and apologizes for it."

"I do not suffer from insanity... I enjoy every minute of it."

"I smile cause I don't know what the hell is going on."

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer.

For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you what you are doing that is so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour-long sob fest, and then start singing and dancing when your favorite song comes on. Crazy is when you do or say a completely random thing, like "Do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or having a thumbwar with yourself. Crazy is when you type up all your favorite sayings, print them off and tape them to your wall, just for something to do. Crazy is when you memorize the complete biographies and physical traits of every character in Twilight (or almost, at least). Crazy is when you write Jasper, Emmett or Edward Cullen is hot on your homework instead of doing it. Crazy is downloading all of Twilight and New Moon off the books on C.D. from the libary, and listening to them over and over again. Crazy is when you dont say a thing about yourself in your fanfiction bio but insted yell random things that make you lafe. Crazy is when you start getting antisocial because you want to read instead of hanging out with your friends. Crazy is when you laugh about how Edward Cullen thinks Bella is DEAD in New Moon, even though it's a very serious matter, and your sister hears you and asks why you're laughing so loud and you tell her and she just cries about it because she thinks it's sad. Crazy is when you head bang to a slow song, or become obsessed with the song "Let it Die" by Three Days Grace because it reminds you of Edward Cullen for some odd reason. Crazy is naming your winter jacket Mr. Puffy and your best friend naming hers Mrs. Puffy and letting them marry for the winter. Crazy is when you are taking a math test and go over on ur scrap sheet of paper to work out the problem, and start drawing spirals until the teacher goes five minutes left! Crazy is having a major argument with your friend...and i mean major...its still going on and it has already been a year...about which one is better: pudding or jello. Then at the end of the winter, they both retire and divorce each other. Crazy is not sleeping 3 nights in a row because you stayed up reading fanfiction and then jumping in bed at 7:00 am when you’re mom comes to wake you up so you can get ready to go to work with her, where there is a computer where you continue to read fanfiction. Crazy is laughing your ass off while you’re supposed to be giving a report on Pluto and then being threatened by you teacher that she will fail you if you don’t stop cackling like an idiotic hyena. Wrote a fanfiction (for your own amusement) about Edward Cullen falling in love with a turtle who loves a monkey, but Emmett loves the monkey and threatens to squish the turtle which makes Edward go all PMSy! Crazy is freaking out because you saw a silver volvo and tripped on the sidewalk laughing like a maniac.Crazy is when you start laughing until you butt falls off for no apparent reason and your mom comes in the room and goes like, "What the hell is going on?" Crazy is if you suddenly yell, 'PARTY IN MY TUMMY!' and everyone stares at you in Pre-Algebra class.Crazy is having an argument with your best friend about who gets to date Edward Cullen.Crazy is when you compare everything and everyone to Twilight. Crazy is when you knick name you eraser Fang from Maximum Ride so he can always be with you then when one of your friends drops him down a drain accidently you start to bawl your eyes out. Crazy is when you are in the car and you pass a building and scream cause you think it says ITEX when really it says INEX and you do that every time you pass it even though you've seen it a million times before. Crazy is when you go up to random strangers and say that you their long lost child. If you're crazy, copy this onto your profile and add something crazy you've done to the list!

The SOUND TRACK of my life

So, here's how it works: 1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc) 2. Put it on shuffle 3. Press play 4. For every question, type the song that's playing 5. When you go to a new question, press the next button 6. Don't lie and try to pretend your cool... and alot of the songs fit with the setting

Opening Credits: Sunshine Girl- Britt Nicole

Waking Up: You belong with me- Taylor Swift

First Day At School: About You - ZOEgirl

Trying To Fit In: Home- Natalie Grant (this is just depressing)

Falling In Love: Innocent- Taylor Swift

Fight Song: Thoughts of You- BarlowGirl

Breaking Up: Change- Carrie Underwood

Prom night: Meg Mell (off vocal ver.)-Clannad OST Disk 3

Life: I Don’t Wanna Go- Avalon

Mental Breakdown: Security- Stacie Orrico ( this doesn’t really work)

Driving: Enough- BarlowGirl

Flashback: Together- Krystal Meyers

Getting back together: Every Time We Touch –Cascada

Wedding: Spring Wind- Clannad OST Disk 1

Birth of Child: At Once- Clannad OST Disk 1

Final Battle Beautiful Ending- BarlowGirl

Funeral Song: Make Me Over- Natalie Grant

Final Credits: Atmosphere (Remix)- Toby Mac

You Know You’re Obsessed With Percy Jackson When…

You go to the Empire State Building and you ask for the 600th Floor.

Every time you use the Internet, you thank Hermes.

When you see Harry Potter, you think of Percy with glasses.

You burn food to see if it smells good.

You see an owl, you go, “Hi Athena!”

You’re in a running/swimming race and you’re praying and sacrificing to Hermes/Poseidon.

You think that your favorite singer is a child of Apollo.

Someone close to you dies and you give them money (LOTS of it) just in case…

Everyone else is creating a Twilight family and you create a PJO family.

You go on a cruise and you hope the boat isn’t The Princess Andromeda…

You’re on a boat and you pray that Poseidon is in a good mood.

You’re in the air (hang-gliding, cliff-diving, bungee jumping, flying, in a plane, etc.) and you hope Zeus is in a good mood and won’t blast you out of the air.

You go to Aunty Em’s and say you’re camera shy.

You find your true love and thank Aphrodite for sending him/her to you

You know Muse is the best singers. Get it, the Nine Muses??

Bring a blue plastic hairbrush with you everywhere.

When it gets really cold randomly, blame Kronos.

You get a Greek mythology calendar for Christmas

You get really mad at Hades when a family member dies.

You sometimes try to control water.

You don't read anything but PJO for 3 months.

You've gone to Google maps and looked up Camp Half-Blood’s address.

You carry a ballpoint pen in your pocket.

That everytime you pick up a pen, you think it'll turn into a sword.

Everytime you play dodgeball, you bring a suit of armor.

You go to San Fransisco looking for the Old Sea Man.

You find yourself praying to Poseidon for rain.

Whenever your internet slows down, you yell at the sky and say "HERMES! WHY DO YOU LOVE ANNOYING ME?!"

You pray to Athena when you don’t study for a math test.

And when you flunk said test, you blame her irritation on Percabeth

You start hearing Percabeth in every song you hear.

You curse a god/goddess a lot.

You have one (Or more) pictures relating to PJO in your room.

You know PJO better then most sane people. (Yupers)

At least half of your friends have read all the PJO, or are going to in the very near future

You wish you could find a rainbow and a golden drachma to see if Iris messages work

You give friends and youself a godly parent,

You are trying to learn Greek

You keep thinking about one of the PJO books when you go on a trip.

You think of Percy every time you see a dark haried green-eyed boy

You have an instant crush on Nico! (Hades NO!)

You just have to research more about greek mythology (Did that. Know everything now. )

You want to learn Latin.

You copy/paste this onto your profile

Most of your fics are PJO related, even if it is a cross over

You have taken every test you can find about what demigodly parent you would/should have, and your trying to get your friends to

You make sure all of your friends (Or most of them), have an idea about what you say when talking about PJO

Your friends (At least one), think you are obbsessed with PJO, and you agree (Duh!! I've been trying to get a bunch of my other friends to read it. Some of them have, and they love it :D)

You have one or more things related to PJO on your school stuff, and if someone asks you why, you tell them

You have something on your school things (Or home things), that says 'Daughter (Or son if you're a guy) of God/goddess', and you don't even try to hide it, even if it says daughter of Name of unliked god/goddess.

You’re nodding and smiling when you read this

You own every single book

You are planning on adding a lot more things to this list

You call yourself a demigod

You wish with every fibre of your being that the first page of The Lightning Theif told the truth, and the PJO series is real

You find yourself praying to a random god when you didn't study for a math test because you were too busy reading PJO

You've called someone you know a satyr.

You think the TLT poster in your room is a video camera, and they are secretly watching you.

Copy the bunny onto your profile to help him achieve world domination. Come join the dark side. (We have cookies!)

If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have music in your soul, post this in your profile!

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room add this to your profile

IF YOU ARE AGAINST CHILD ABUSE, COPY/PASTE THIS ON YOUR PROFILE!!

Her name was Auroura
She was only five
This is what happened
When she was alive

Her dad was a drunk
Her mom was an addict
Her parents kept her
Locked in an attic

Her only friend
was a little toy bear
It was old and worn out
And had patches of hair

She always talked to it
When no one's around
She lays there and hugs it
Not a peep of sound

Until her parents
unlock the door
Some more and more pain
She'll have to endure

A bruise on her leg
A scar on her face
Why would she be
In such a horrible place?

But she grabs her bear
And softly cries
She loves her parents
But they want her to die

She sits in the corner
Quiet but thinking,
"Please God, why is
My life always sinking? "

Such a bad life
For a sad little kid
She'd get beaten and beaten
For anything she did

Then one night
Her mom came home high
And the poor child was beaten
As hours went by

Then her mom suddenly
Grabbed for a blade
It was sharp and pointy
One that she made

She thrusted the blade
Right in her chest,
"You deserve to die
You worthless piece of s!"

The mom walked out
Leaving the girl slowly dying
She grabbed her bear
And again started crying

Police showed up
At the small little house
Then quickly barged in
Everything quiet as a mouse

One officer slowly
Opened a door
To find the little girl
Lying dead on the floor

It must have been bad
To go through so much harm
But at least she died
With her best friend in her arms

(add this to your profile if your against child abuse)

I want child abuse to stop! and if you do, too, copy and paste this onto your profile Thank you to flamin. guitarist for posting this in your profile and for letting others read it

Things Maximum Ride has Taught Us:

1. Being different is okay.

2. Even the little things can help save the world.

3. Red-heads are evil!

4. Love always makes itself known. Even if it takes you five books and fourteen years of your life to see it, it's there.

5. 6-year-olds do have the ability to take over the world.

6. Duct tape is a handy tool if you have a mimicking 8-year-old.

7. The loss of a vet would be a tragedy.

8. Dressing in dark clothes and never talking does not make you emo; it makes you Fang-like.

9. French is the universal language.

10. Fang-sized is an acceptable form of measurement.

11. Count your blessings.

12. Teen magazines don't help you in life or death situations.

13. Nachos and Moutain Dew are proper mind controlling devices.

14. Fang has the power to sum up your life story in nine words.

15. Even a kick-butt, leader of a merry band of mutants like Max can make mistakes.

16. Never get hooked on Valium.

17. The best breed of dogs are talking Scotties!!

18. If one cannot be corrupted by power or money, there's always Snicker's bars.

19. It is okay to sell your soul for a chocolate-chip cookie.

20. Kids are better than adults.

21. You'll know the Apocalypse is coming when Max is wearing a dress.

22. The best cooks are blind pyros.

23. Submarines are tiny tin cans of doom.

24. Desert rat should always be cooked to well-done.

25. School really is an evil place.

26. Teachers really are out to get you.

27. Remember to flap.

28. Only one bird kid could pull off preppy Top-Siders.

29. GIRLS KICK BOYS' BUTTS!!

30. The order of power: Chuck Norris, Max, Fang, Angel, Iggy, Gazzy, Nudge, Total, humans, animals. Brigid, Sam, Dylan and Lissa don’t make the list.

Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?

Boy: No

Girl: Do you like me?

Boy: No

Girl: Do you want me?

Boy: No

Girl: Would you cry if I left?

Boy: No

Girl: Would you live for me?

Boy: No

Girl: Would you do anything for me?

Boy: No

Girl: Choose--me or your life

Boy: My life

The girl runs away in shock and pain and the boy runs after her and says... The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind. The reason why I don't like you is because I love you. The reason I don't want you is because I need you. The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left. The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you. The reason why I'm not willing to do you anything for you is because I would do everything for you. The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life. If you find this incredibly cute and touching, copy and paste it into your profile


I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I CUT my wrists, so I MUST be EMO

I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be mean.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER so I WILL go to hell.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals.
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a
savage.
I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I must be a SLUT.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.-yep
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of

girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be dating them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and that's how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi
I hang out with GAYS, so I must be GAY TOO.
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas
I'm a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction
I'm a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude.
I'm STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and Kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm MIXED so I MUST be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.- i like to think of this as unique
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon.
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be snobby.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a wimp.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be over controlling.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs/nuts.
I read COMICS, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse-love horses
I’m a GOTH, so I MUST be a Satanist
I’m a CROSS DRESSER, so I must be homosexual
I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak.
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak.
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.

I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.- i actually write emo story's
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to
castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.- i have many
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and
is A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent,
love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the
planet: past, present, and future.
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser.
I care about the ENVIRONMENT so I MUST be a tree hugging hippy.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins.
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion.
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IMMATURE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.- so true
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or
MISGUIDED.
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST- my brothers a terrorist
I'm A WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick, and I
MUST worship the devil.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED.

I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast.

I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be pedantic.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm AUSTRALIAN so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroos.
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up
with the times.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.
I LOVE MARCHING BAND, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I AM FRIENDS WITH A CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.
I CRY EASILY, so I MUST be a wimp.
I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, then burst
into tears at one mistake
I DON'T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELLED
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean. ( I am mean, but still...)
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I’m CATHLOIC so I I MUST think all gay people are going to hell.


Find the guy that calls you beautiful instead of hot,

who calls you back when you hang up on him,

who'll lay under the stars for hours and listen to your heart beat.

Or will stay awake just to watch you sleep.

Wait for the guy that kisses your forehead,

who keeps your picture in his wallet,

who wants to show you off to the world even when your in sweatpants,

who holds your hand in front of all his friends,

who thinks your beautiful without makeup,

one who is constantly telling you of how much he cares and how is lucky to have you,

THE one who turns to his friends and says THAT'S HER!


STOP RACISM! NOW! DO IT! NOW! I SAID NOW!

A black man walks into a cafe one early morning and noticed that he was the only black man there. As he sat down, he noticed a white man behind him. The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "When I was born I was black,"

"When I grew up I was black,"

"When I'm sick I'm black,"

"When I go in the sun I'm black,"

"When I'm cold I'm black,"

"When I die I'll be black." "But you sir..."

"When you're born you're pink,"

"When you grow up you're white,"

"When you're sick, you're green,"

"When you go in the sun you turn red,"

"When you're cold you turn blue,"

"And when you die you turn purple."

"And yet you have the nerve to call me colored" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...


Top 75 Most Annoying Things To Do In An Elevator

When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and then pretend it wasn't you.

Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.

Ask if you can push the button for other people, but push the wrong ones.

Call the Psychic Hotline from your cell phone and ask if they know what floor your on.

Hold the doors open and say your waiting for a friend. After a while, let the doors close, and say, "Hi Greg. How's your day been?"

Drop a pen and wait until someone goes to pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!"

Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the elevator.

Move your desk into the elevator and whenever anyone gets on, ask if they have an appointment.

Lay down the twister mat and ask people if they would like to play.

Leave a box in the corner, and when someone gets on, ask them if they can hear ticking.

Pretend you are a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.

Ask, "Did you feel that?"

Stand really close to someone, sniffing them occasionally.

When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay, don't panic, they open again!"

Swat at flies that don't exist.

Tell people that you can see their aura.

Call out, "Group Hug!"and then enforce it.

Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering, "Shut up, all of you, just shut up!"

Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside, ask, "Got enough air in there?"

Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.

Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror, "Your one of THEM!" and back away slowly.

Wear a puppet on your hand and use it to talk to the other passengers.

Listen to the elevator walls with your stethoscope.

Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

Stare, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce, "I have new socks on".

Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers, "This is MY personal space!"

Put police tape in front of the door before entering.

Fart loudly when there are only two of you in the elevator. Argue vehemently that it wasn't you.

Do the "potty dance" all the way to the elevator door. Upon arrival, sigh and look greatly relieved.

Throw a rave.

Place potted plants and water fountains at strategic locations in the lift. When people ask what you are doing, tell them you "won't ride an elevator that's not fung shwei."

Greet everyone getting on with a warm handshake and ask them to call you "Admiral".

Hum the first six notes of the "It's a small world" over and over again.

Lean over to another rider and whisper 'Noogie patrol coming!'"

Have a heated debate with yourself.

Bring a melon onto the elevator. Try to sell it to the other passengers.

Drum on every available surface.

Write a big X on the elevator floor, and hand out "pirate" maps to everyone as they enter.

Give psychotherapy to the other passengers.

Greet everyone coming on as if they were your best friend. Use the same name for all of them.

Say "ring ring," then pull a banana out of your pocket and start talking into it.

Propose to the other passengers.

Challenge people to duels.

Sell girl scout cookies.

Come on looking really scared, and say to another passenger..."I'm kinda nervous...this is my first time flying..."

Any time someone enters the doors, recoil in horror.

Shout "Food fight!"

Every time someone else talks, angrily shout: "Some people are trying to sleep here!"

When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to pull the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.

Lick one of the buttons. Tell the other passengers you're sick and tired of people stealing your food the second you turn your back.

Elevators were practically MADE for river dnce!

Bring a snowboard onto the elevator. Put it on. Every time the lift goes up or down, shout "WOO-YEAH! This is what I call sick air!"

Shave.

Every time the elevator goes down, loudly scream "OH MY GOD!! We're all gonna die! This is it! This is it! It's over! IT'S OVER!!" Look relieved when it stops moving. When you begin to drop again, repeat.

Ask the other passengers if they want to see your glass clown collection.

Practice your kung fu.

Make race car noises when people get on and off.

Ask everyone on the elevator: "Are you my mother?"

Fly a model airplane.

Do yoga.

Play the accordion

Enter the elevator with nothing on your head. Individually ask everyone if they like your hat.

Bring a rocking chair. Sit and knit.

Recite gangsta rap lyrics in monotone.

Enter with a shovel, and attempt to "dig for treasure."

Read "Green Eggs and Ham" at the top of your lungs. Sound out every word


At age 8, your dad buys you an ice cream. You thanked him by dripping it all over his lap.

When you were 9 years old, he paid for piano lessons. You thanked him by never even bothering to practice.

When you were 10 years old he drove you all day, from soccer to football to one birthday party after another. You thanked him by jumping out of the car and never looking back.

When you were 11 years old, he took you and your friends to the movies. You thanked him by asking to sit in a different row.

When you were 12 years old, he warned you not to watch certain TV shows. You thanked him by waiting until he left the house.

When you were 13, he suggested a haircut that was in fashion. You thanked him by telling him he had no taste.

When you were 14, he paid for a month away at summer camp. You thanked him by forgetting to write a single letter.

When you were 15, he came home from work, looking for a hug. You thanked him by having your bedroom door locked.

When you were 16, he taught you how to drive his car. You thanked him by taking it every chance you could.

When you were 17, he was expecting an important call. You thanked him by being on the phone all night.

When you were 18, he cried at your high school graduation. You thanked him by staying out partying until dawn.

When you were 19, he paid for your college tuition, drove you to campus carried your bags. You thanked him by saying good-bye outside the dorm so you wouldn't be embarrassed in front of your friends.

When you were 25, he helped to pay for your wedding, and he told you how deep he loved you. You thanked him by moving halfway across the country.

When you were 50, he fell ill and needed you to take care of him . You thanked him by reading about the burden parents become to their children.

And then, one day, he quietly died. And everything you never did came crashing down like thunder on YOUR HEART. If you love your dad, post this on your profile


A girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle

Girl: Slow down, I'm scared!

Guy: No, this is fun.

Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.

Guy: Then tell me you love me.

Girl: I love you, now slow down!

Guy: Now give me a big hug.

She gives him a big hug

Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me.

In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she would live even if he died. Copy this onto your profile if you would do the same thing for someone you love


EMBRACE THE WEIRDNESS! If you embrace the weirdness, then copy and paste this onto your profile

Girls are like apples on trees.
The best ones are at the top of the tree.The boys don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they just get the rotten apples from the ground that aren't as good, but easy. So the apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, they're amazing. They just have to wait for the right boy to come along, the one who's brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree.

I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on Facebook, or talking to a girlfriend on a cell phone or regular phone. I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in over a year. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn't care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with Maximum Ride, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things. Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone: Iheartjake, TeamJacob101, Boysareadrag, The Dawn Is Breaking, twilite addict, The Lonely Teenager, AliceDaSpaz, Skittle.Rocke, Silent_Broken_Heart, St. Fang of Boredom, flyaway111, physics chick, CrazyNerdyFangirl, Safira Rue Mellark, Mimpy, MaxRide25, The Wolf Who Walks Alone, RedwoodAngel


Funny stuff i've heard so far in my life/ Random funny/ stupid stuff

I liked homework when it was called coloring.

"DO YOU KNOW WHO MY FATHER IS?!" -some guy in hadcuffs. "What? Your mother never told you?" - police officer.

I laugh at everything...sorry...its a habit.

Friends stop to ask if your ok, best friends scream SHE'S TICKED!! MOVE!!

Hey you. Yeah, you. No, not you...That other guy. You right there! YES, YOU. Do you like tacos?

So stick that in your juice box and suck it

Q: Am i stupid or smart?

A: Yes

She's my best friend. You break her heart, i'll break your face.

Your my best friend Foreve_ but no R, because that would be the end of forever.

Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries.

We are the Knights Who Say NI!

We are now the Knights who say -speak gibberish-

This is how you roll your L's. "Le le le le le"

SILENCE!! ...i kill you.

"What does the D stand for?" - the puppet dude "My theme song." -puppet "What's your theme song?" - puppet dude. Puppet does superman pose "Du du du duuuuuu!"

Ooooh! Drama! Let's get some popcorn!!

i have a head!! OMG!! ME TOO!! LETS BE FRIENDS!!

Ok, lets stop being difficult and just take life's freaking lemons!

Don't make me get my poking stick!!

I love faking random accents

If's schools so smart how come grades go...A, B, C, D, F!! What ever happened to E??

Buddy the Elf whats your favorite color?

Oops! Did my sarcasm hurt your feelings? Get over it!!

Come to de dark side!! (but bring a flashlight because its dark over here)

I would LOVE to jump into a pool of jello.

Always forgive your enemys... nothing annoys them so much.

Never do anything you dont want to explain to the paramedics

Apparently 1 in 5 people are chinese, there are five people in my familly so it must be one of them. it's ether my mum or dad. or my older brother Colin. or my younger brother Ho-Chan-Chu. but i think it's Colin.

There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count & and those that cant.

Why is Donkey Kong called "DONKEY" Kong if he's a monkey?

If your name is Mr. Crunch, and you joined the Navy, would you eventually be Captain Crunch?

364 days of the year, parents tell their kids not to take candy from strangers, yet on Halloween, its encouraged! Why is that?!

Whoever said nothing is impossible, never tried slamming a revolving door...

Crazy is a relative term in my family!

If the swat team breaks down your door do they have to replace it later?

"Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way you're a mile away from them and you have their shoes."

"Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most."

"An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed."

I love deadlines. I like to wave at them as they pass by

boys are like slinkies. they seem useless but bring a smile to your face when you push them down the stairs.

boys are like parking spaces. all the good ones are taken and the only ones left are the handicapped.

the space between your fingers were created so that another person could full them - unknown

meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was completely choice, but fallling in love with you was beyond my control - unknown

if i could be any part of you id be you tears. to be concived in your heart, born in your eyes, live on your cheeks, and die on your lips - unknown

you know your in love when you dont want to go to sleep because reality is finally better than your dreams - Dr. Suess

today i caught myself smiling for no reason... then i realized i was thinking about you - unknown

sometimes people put up walls, not to keep people out but to see who cares enough to break them down - unknown

nobody is worth your tears and the one who is wont make you cry - unknown

its amazing how someone can break your heart, but you still love them with all the little pieces - unknown

if you cant get someone off your mind, they're probably supposed to be there - unknown

last night i looked up and matched each star with a reason why i love you. i was doing pretty good until i ran out of stars - unknown

love is giving someone the power to destroy you then trusting them not to - unknown

there is nothing worse then meaning nothing to the person who means everything to you - unknown

sometimes the person you fall for, isnt ready to catch you - unknown

flying is learning to throw yourself at the ground and miss - unknown (i am an expert at this) :P

the only reason people get lost in thought is because its unfamiliar territory - unknown

everything is funny as long as its happening to some one else - unknown

the two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity. but not in that order. - unknown


you randomly check your email every five minutes while on the computer, copy this into your profile and write your name: MysticalPearl, MaxWing,sk8rchickmax,BlackwingRainbowtips. MyNameIsCAL. RedwoodAngel

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: danyan, Zutara Lover, Black'n'red'Butterfly, Enrica, twilightgirl1918, Just A Little Bit Dramatic, Pirates OWNS you, Cripsee, I'll have some stupid cliche, Insane Winged Girl, MysticalPearl,MaxWing,sk8rchickmax,Blackwingsrainbowtips, MyNameIsCAL, RedwoodAngel

Girl Comebacks!

Man: Where have you been all my life? Woman: Hiding from you.

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before? Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Is this seat empty? Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

Man: Your place or mine? Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.

Man: So, what do you do for a living? Woman: I'm a female impersonator.

Man: Hey baby, what's your sign? Woman: Do not enter.

Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning? Woman: Unfertilized.

Man: Your body is like a temple. Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.

Man: I would go to the end of the world for you. Woman: But would you stay there?

Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy. Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together Woman: Really, I'd put f and u together

Man: Your eyes they're amazing. Woman: Seeing your back would be pretty amazing.

If you repost this you will get a phone call 37 minutes after you repost this... If you don't resend this then your love life will be doomed for eternity.

GIRLS REPOST THIS AS "female comebacks"

Try Not To Cry

Mommy...Johnny brought a gun to school,

He told his friends that it was cool,

And when he pulled the trigger back,

It shot with a great, huge crack.

Mommy, I was a good girl, I did what I was told,

I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold!

When I went to school that day,

I never said good-bye.

I'm sorry that I had to go, But Mommy, please don't cry.

When Johnny shot the gun, he hit me and another,

And all because Johnny, got the gun from his brother.

Mommy, please tell Daddy; That I love him very much,

And please tell Zack; my boyfriend; That it wasn't just a crush.

And tell my little sister; That she is the only one now, And tell my dear sweet grandmother; I'll be waiting for her now

And tell my wonderful friends; That they always were the best

Mommy, I'm not the first, I'm no better than the rest

Mommy, tell my teachers; I won't show up for class,

And never to forget this, And please don't let this pass

Mommy, why'd it have to be me? No one, though. deserves this.

But mommy, it's not fair, I left without a kiss.

But mommy, it's not fair, I left without a kiss.

I think I even saw one doctor, trying not to cry.

Mommy, I'm slowly dying, with a bullet in my chest,

But Mommy please remember, I'm in heaven with the rest

When I heard that great, big crack, I ran as fast as I could

please listen to me if you would,

I wanted to go to college, I wanted to try things that were new

I guess I'm not going with Daddy, On that trip to the new zoo I wanted to get married, I wanted to have a kid,

I wanted to be an actress, I really wanted to live.

But Mommy I must go now, The time is getting late, Mommy, tell my Zack, I'm sorry I to cancel the date. I love you Mommy, I always have, I know you know its true

And Mommy all I need to say is, "Mommy, I love you"

In Memory of The Columbine & Virginia Tech
Students Who Were Lost

Please if you would,
Don't smash this on the ground.

If you pass this on,

Maybe people will cry,

Just keep this in your heart,

For the people who didn't get to say "Good-bye".

Now you have 2 choices,

1) Pass this on, and show people you care, repost as
"Try Not To Cry"
2) Don't send it, and you have just proven how
cold-hearted you really are...

Da 25 BEST Chuck Norris Jokes in No Real Order! Fight 4 Randomness

1. Some magicians walk on water; Chuck Norris swims through land.
2. Chuck Norris through a grenade- and killed 50 people! Then it exploded.
3. BAD ONE!!! Chuck Norris visited the Virgin Islands. They are now The Islands.
4. A man once taunted Chuck Norris with a bag of Lay’s potato chips, saying “Betcha can’t eat just one!” Chuck Norris proceeded to eat the chips, the bag, and the man in one deft move.
5. According to Einstein’s theory of relativity, Chuck Norris can actually roundhouse kick you yesterday.
6. Cars were invented to have a faster way of fleeing from Chuck Norris. Not to be outdone, Chuck Norris invented the car accident.
7. Chuck Norris had a staring contest with the sun- and won.
8. Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
9. Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer (Can't touch this).
10. Chuck Norris cowboy boots are made of real cowboys.
11. Chuck Norris crossed the road. No one has ever dared question his motives.
12. Chuck Norris doesn’t daydream. He’s too busy giving other people nightmares.
13. Chuck Norris doesn’t go hunting, because 'hunt' implies the propability of failure. CHUCK NORRIS GOES KILLING.
14. Chuck Norris enjoys a good practical joke. His favorite is where he removes your lower intestine and pretends to make a balloon animal out of it. Then he cracks your skull open with a Volvo for not complimenting him on his balloon animal.
15. Chuck Norris has never looked a baby in the eyes cause it might make him cry, but if he does it also makes him want to punch a baby.
16. Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own. 17. Chuck Norris invented black. In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented pink. Admit it, that was good!
18. In ancient China there is a legend that one day an invinsible child will be born of a dragon, grow to be a great, famous man, and vanquish all evil from the land. That man is not Chuk Norris; Chuck Norris killed that man. My fav!
19. Chuck Norris was widely predicted to be first black president. If you’re thinking to yourself, “But Chuck Norris isn’t black”, then you are dead wrong. And stop being a racist.
20. Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its decendants are known today as Giraffes.
21. Chuck Norris once played rugby by himself. He went undefeated. Chuck Norris once played rugby by himself. He went undefeated.
22. Chuck Norris once round-house kicked a salesman. Over the phone.
23. Chuck Norris puts the laughter in manslaughter.
24. Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse-kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn’t stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
25. Chuck Norris was once a knight in King Arthur’s court. He was known as Sir Beatdown. Bonus joke: Chuck Norris once urinated on the gas tank of an eighteen-wheeler as a joke; we know that truck today as Optimus Prime.

Funniest Quotes in History!Fight 4 Randomness

1. Capitalization is important. Without it, there's no difference between Helping your Uncle Jack off a horse and helping your uncle jack off a horse.
2. Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.
3. I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not panicking, like his passengers.
4. I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
5. My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.
6. I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.
7. A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
8. Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
9. You do not need a parachute to skydive. You need a parachute to skydive twice.
10. A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip.
11. Always remember you're unique. Just like everyone else.
12. If you aren't fired with enthusiasm, you will be fired with enthusiasm - Vince Lombardi Best ever!!!!
13. Easy as 3.1415926535897932384626433832795028841
14. A day without sunshine is like, well, night.
15. On the other hand you have different fingers.
16. Never underestimate the power of very stupid people in large groups. Ever hear of the government?
17. Another month ends. All targets met. All systems working. All customers satisfied. All staff eagerly enthusiastic. All pigs fed and ready to fly.
18. Well, I've got to get back to work. When I stop rowing, the slave ship just goes in circles.
19. Anything worth fighting for is worth fighting dirty for.
20. Don't spend two dollars to dry clean a shirt. Donate it to the Salvation Army instead. They'll clean it and put it on a hanger. Next morning buy it back for seventy-five cents.
21. Why do we kill people who kill people to show them that killing people is wrong?
22. Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Favorite Quotes:

I am who I am with no exceptions- Haley Williams (Paramore)

Quack, damn you- Jamie, mythbusters

I reject your reality and substitute my own- Adam, mythbusters

And if you throw it at your brother really herd, it'll kill him- Jamie, mythbusters

I like hardcover books, because every time someone says that reading is stupid, I smack them with whatever book I have on hand.

Love? I'd rather fall in chocolate.

Yes, I hit like a girl. You would too if you hit a little bit harder.

The only thing better than chocolate is a good friend with chocolate

When Life gives you lemons, squirt them into Life's eyes and see how Life likes lemons then!

Remember there's a light at the end of every tunnel, just make sure its not a train.

Don't take life too seriously, it's not like you're getting out alive

The pen is mightier than the sword, and considerably easier to write with

Some people are like Slinkies: not really good for anything, but they still bring a smile to your face, when you push them down a flight of stairs

A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.

Tough times never last, but tough people do

Imagination is more important than knowledge

You say I've lost my sanity. Well I have news for you. You can't lose what you never had

Yeah, Im a loser. but the coolest loser you'll ever meet

There's nothing wrong with talking to random objects, its when they start to talk back that you need to worry.

Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.

What you call dog with no legs? Don't matter what you call him, he ain't gonna come.

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.

Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.

I could've eaten Alphabits and crapped out a better essay!!

Constantly choosing the lesser of two evils is still choosing evil

You laugh because I'm different...I laugh cause I just farted!

He who laughs last didn't get it.

The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.

Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. It's just that yours is stupid.

There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car.

If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button.

Better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than to open it and remove all doubt

If you haven't found something strange during the day, it hasn't been much of a day

Any fool can tell the truth, but it requires a man of some sense to know how to lie well

You need only reflect that one of the best ways to get yourself a reputation as a dangerous citizen these days is to go about repeating the very phrases which our founding fathers used in the struggle for independence.

Those who criticize our generation forget who raised it.

Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian, anymore than standing in your garage makes you a car

If you’re one in a million, there are six thousand people exactly like you

I feel so miserable without you, it’s almost like having you here.

I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book

Nothing is more discouraging than unappreciated sarcasm.

There’s too much blood in my caffeine system.

Flying is simple. You just throw yourself at the ground and miss

All people have the right to stupidity but some abuse the privilege.

why are they called apartments if they are all stuck together?

There can be over one million fangirls of someone, but in your own mind, they always belong to you

I know I'm in my own little world, but it's okay, they know me here

You know what makes me sad? YOU DO! Why don't we just waltz on over to nambi-pambi land and get you some self confidence, you jackwagon! Tissue? Crybaby!

Heaven doesn't want me and Hell is afraid I'll take over.

They say "guns don't kill people; people kill people", but I think guns help. If you just stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you would kill too many people.

Real girls aren't perfect, perfect girls aren't real. You want a perfect girl? Go buy a Barbie.

Having the love of your life say "We can still be friends" is like having your dog die and your mom saying you can still keep it.

She's my best friend. Break her heart and I'll break your face.

Sometimes you put walls up not to keep people out, but to see who cares enough to break them down

On a scale from Waldo to Anne Frank, how good was that hiding spot?

I like you. People say I’ve got no taste, but I like you.

“Are you being sarcastic?” “Well no duh!”

Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence.

I’m not listening, but keep talking. I enjoy the way your voice makes my ears bleed.

I’m not your type. I’m not inflatable.

“I’d insult you, but the sad truth is that you wouldn’t understand and if I tried to explain it to you, your brain might implode from information overload.”

Mirrors can’t talk, lucky for you they can’t laugh either.

This place is so weird that the cockroaches have moved next door.

I would have liked to insult you, but the sad truth is that you wouldn't understand me.

He always finds himself lost in thought; it's unfamiliar territory.

You should do some soul-searching. You might just find one.

If you ever become a mother, can I have one of the puppies?

I'm not so good with the advice... Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?

Imagination is more important than knowledge. For knowledge is limited to all we now know and understand, while imagination embraces the entire world, and all there ever will be to know and understand.

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If your part of the 7 percent that would ask the person "what was your first clue?" copy this onto your profile then add your name to the list:Sunlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A, Moonlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A.,Evil Genus of the C.O.C.A., Invador Miley Phantom, dAnnYsGiRl777, BloodySalvation, Lady Lost-A-Lot, BellaBookworm9, Bella Masen Cullen, Vampire Scooby, Alannaswarrior, Spottedlilly, Alleyanna Cullen, hugs.for.all.the.emo.boyz, I'll have some stupid Cliche, rainxface, maximumride24,FangsGirl24601, A Silenced Angel, UNDERLANDERfromtheOVERLAND. CrazyNerdyFangirl, Safira Rue Mellark, Mimpy, MaxRide25, RedwoodAngel

99% of teenagers would cry if they saw Justin Bieber above the skyscraper about to jump; copy and paste this to your profile if you're the 1% who would stand there with popcorn yelling, "Do a backflip and now I will put soul eater songs

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Parisian Passion by green-eyed-wonder 0-0 reviews
Max met him on an airplane to Paris. She liked him instantly. What's not to like: the shaggy hair, the mysterious black eyes, the rough, deepvoice and the perfect lips. But it didn't matter. It's not like she was going to see him after that incident anyways. So when she sees him everywhere...what does she think? Stalker much? Nope. At least, not according to him. More like Destiny.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 10,274 - Reviews: 73 - Favs: 58 - Follows: 93 - Updated: 6/25 - Published: 8/18/2012 - Max, Fang
The Day I Both Died and Survived by Novastrike687 reviews
Maximum Ride is 19 and hangs at school, but there was an accident that killed her. She has a second chance, but at a cost. Will she ever have a normal life again? Max will have wings after the accident and yes there will be FAX
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 20 - Words: 15,056 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 5/16 - Published: 8/29/2012 - Max, Fang
Don't Tell Daddy! by koolkat136 reviews
After Max and Fang make a mistake, Max suddenly disappears without telling him why for 16 years. That is until Max is captured and her daughter Ryan is the only person who can save her. Ryan's journey sets off with her going to find her dad, Fang, and teaming up with him and the rest of the flock to find Max. But the problem is, Fang doesn't even know about Ryan. BEING REWRITTEN
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 11 - Words: 10,845 - Reviews: 178 - Favs: 46 - Follows: 86 - Updated: 1/8 - Published: 6/15/2012 - Max, Fang
Abuse is Not Just a Word by Fly On 3536 reviews
Maximum Ride is abused. She has been her whole life. But when a Black Haired boy moves in next door. Will he listen to her screams? Or Ignore them? Fax. Eggy. Nazzy. NO WINGSSS!
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 23 - Words: 18,077 - Reviews: 149 - Favs: 73 - Follows: 64 - Updated: 12/12/2014 - Published: 4/9/2012 - Complete
He's Famous, She's Not by Aria Ride reviews
Fang. A famous singer in his band, Sinned & Overrated. Max. A normal girl. But here's a twist, their best friends. Since KINDERGARTEN. But when the band gets ONE entire summer off, Fang and Max do a lot of catching up. Which fortunately, doesn't really sound so bad...
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 10 - Words: 11,154 - Reviews: 106 - Favs: 61 - Follows: 115 - Updated: 12/3/2014 - Published: 9/6/2012 - Max, Fang
Home Is Where My Grave Is by zammielicious98 reviews
Max left the place she grew up in. Home. All thanks to her dad. Now, three years later, she's back. But her old friends since childhood don't seem so happy to see her. Then, of course, there's the new guy. The one that moved into her old house. Great. Based on the book 'She's So Dead To Us' by Kieran Scott. R&R!
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 18 - Words: 50,333 - Reviews: 228 - Favs: 85 - Follows: 105 - Updated: 11/27/2014 - Published: 7/14/2012 - Max, Fang
Liar in the Mirror by AnikaandAj reviews
My name is Maximum Ride. Or at least, it was before I was forced into pretending to be my sister, Maya. I don't know why I did it. I kept insisting that I did it for survival from people who want me dead. Or to escape from my father, the con man. When Maya went missing, I hadn't known how hard it would be to lie to everyone she knew. Especially when I'm falling for her boyfriend AU
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Suspense/Romance - Chapters: 50 - Words: 217,068 - Reviews: 1145 - Favs: 162 - Follows: 191 - Updated: 11/23/2014 - Published: 8/7/2012 - Max, Fang - Complete
Maximum Ride: Over Seas? by No One Is Ever Alone reviews
Max, Ella, and her mum go onto a Carnival Cruise ship. For 3 weeks. Max is dreading the vacation, but what exactly will she think of it when she meets Fang and the rest of the flock? Yes, your favorite pairing, FAX, will be there. I despise Dylan with a burning passion. My first fan fiction :D R&R, flames accepted! Rated T for swearing and the romance. Better safe than sorry!
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 31 - Words: 35,147 - Reviews: 371 - Favs: 79 - Follows: 102 - Updated: 10/22/2014 - Published: 9/26/2012 - Fang, Max
A Model Life by celestialstarynight reviews
The Flock was split up after being rescued from the school five years ago. The girls went with Dr. Martinez and the boys went with Jeb. When both groups try their hand at modeling, they meet back up. Will they remember each other? Adopted from YouHaveToTakeAChance.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Family/Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 7,921 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 9/28/2014 - Published: 9/3/2012 - Fang, Max
Concrete Angel by eternalreader62 reviews
Max and Angel are sisters who get abused by their father Jeb. After hiding their scars for most of their lives something bad happens that leaves Max more hurt than ever. Rated T for violence. R&R.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Drama - Chapters: 12 - Words: 14,599 - Reviews: 59 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 9/1/2014 - Published: 10/4/2012 - Max, Angel - Complete
The Next Door Neighbor From Hell by CrazyPancakes98 reviews
Fang and Max are next door neighbors. There's one little problem however: they absolutely hate eachother. But between the pranks, comebacks and snide remarks, could there be something more? If so they're too stupid to notice...but everyone else does.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 6,236 - Reviews: 65 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 53 - Updated: 8/28/2014 - Published: 6/20/2012 - Max, Fang
Two Different Worlds by Max7272 reviews
When Max's mom dies, her dad starts abusing her. Addition to that, her family is forced to move from their beloved home in the country to the busy city in Arizona. Heart broken and Home Sick, Max can't take it much longer.And then comes Fang. The bad boy who has never been interested in more than your average day city kid life. Can Max show him her world? Or will she be alone?
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 17 - Words: 22,054 - Reviews: 126 - Favs: 65 - Follows: 107 - Updated: 8/12/2014 - Published: 7/13/2012 - Max, Fang
The Surrogate by Birdwatched reviews
Dr. Louis retrieved and saved Max, Fang, Iggy, and Ella from separate branches of Itex four years ago, when the whitecoats planned to get Max pregnant and start a line of new avian hybrids. With Lou dead now, can the four stay under the radar enough to just survive?
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 25 - Words: 110,502 - Reviews: 197 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 71 - Updated: 8/10/2014 - Published: 2/6/2012 - Max, Fang, Iggy, Ella
Talent School by Lillylovesbooks reviews
Max was accepted into a large school built for embracing talents, but she doesn't think she has what it takes. What happens when she falls and breaks then falls again? What happens when she makes new friends? What happens when the 2 worst things ever to happen to her make a reappearance? And what happens when everything changes? Is it for the better, or is it for the worse? Fax!
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 9 - Words: 26,770 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 44 - Updated: 7/23/2014 - Published: 8/11/2012 - Fang, Max
Secrets by fallingstars97 reviews
Max and Gazzy lost their dad. Max is moving in with her mom and Gazzy is going in an orphanage. Max takes him with her. they meet Fang Nick Ride Dylan's archenemy, Nudge Monique Tanner , Iggy James Smith and Angel Ride. Max and fang become friends but is there something more? will they fight for what they have? or will Dylan succeed on breaking their relationship? FAX! EGGY!
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 25 - Words: 52,701 - Reviews: 58 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 57 - Updated: 6/18/2014 - Published: 8/14/2012 - Fang, Max
The New Me by NotSureYetHunny reviews
Maximum Ride. The quiet girl in class. You can tease her relentlessly and she won't fight back. This is how she lives her life until she has an accident and ends up with personal memory loss. She remembers nothing about her life, but learns as she goes along that she was not the person she wanted to be. Can she change that? *Currently Discontinued*
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Mystery - Chapters: 37 - Words: 42,470 - Reviews: 518 - Favs: 148 - Follows: 184 - Updated: 2/11/2014 - Published: 7/30/2012 - Max, Fang
What About the Perfect Ones? by NotSureYetHunny reviews
Maximum Ride had one word describe her whole life. Perfect. She wasn't perfect, but everyone else thought she was. As much as they thought they did, no one ever actually wants perfect. And Max knew it all to well. Max Ride. Perfect AND Unwanted. So, what is there left to do.. but leave? This just might be the adventure of a life time. *Discontinued*
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 31 - Words: 38,810 - Reviews: 603 - Favs: 112 - Follows: 156 - Updated: 2/11/2014 - Published: 9/7/2012 - Max, Fang
Feel My Dubstep by AlyNova reviews
For Max, a deaf 17 y/o, life hadn't always been silent. She once knew what sound was like, now years after the incident, Max craves to find something to make her happy. Maybe a summer with her Aunt and cousins in Portland wouldn't be bad at all. Maybe she could find happiness in music through a mysterious Dubstep artist's dreams. FAX
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 17 - Words: 42,403 - Reviews: 159 - Favs: 72 - Follows: 109 - Updated: 1/31/2014 - Published: 6/23/2012 - Fang, Max
Playing With The Enemy by PurpleUnicornK reviews
Max Has to deal with the fact that her worst enemy is in her life 24/7. She can't stand the fact that he is her best friends brother, He's in almost all her classes, her lover in the play, and he's her math tutor. Will she give up or go with the flow? Fax
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 29 - Words: 34,782 - Reviews: 389 - Favs: 180 - Follows: 240 - Updated: 1/16/2014 - Published: 11/7/2011 - Max, Fang
Home Would Be Wherever the Hell Your Heart Is by Iceytaste reviews
To escape his alcoholic father's antics, Fang moves for the summer to stay with his divorced mother and sister. He finds out it's more home than his real home ever was... especially when a local girl named Max gets involved. What happens when it's time for Fang to leave at the end of summer? "Fang moves" story - doesn't bite, only licks.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 9,678 - Reviews: 78 - Favs: 37 - Follows: 69 - Updated: 12/24/2013 - Published: 8/15/2012 - Max, Fang
Songs From The Trees by Dot Ride reviews
Max is an abused girl, who sings in the trees of her local park every night. Fang is the popular boy who has it all, but one day hears Max in the park. Will he pursue the songs from the trees, or will he let a life be lost?
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 26 - Words: 60,545 - Reviews: 593 - Favs: 250 - Follows: 227 - Updated: 11/17/2013 - Published: 8/8/2012 - Max, Fang - Complete
Party Boys Like You Don't Save Cinderellas Like Me by dreams-and-schemes86 reviews
Maximum Ride is a semi-normal girl who's trying hard to live life right. Nick Walker is a famous singer with a rep for being a "Party Boy". What will happen when they accidently meet at a concert? And what will Nick do to win over Max? Major Fax! Rated T. *no wings*
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 34 - Words: 33,275 - Reviews: 1145 - Favs: 243 - Follows: 349 - Updated: 10/11/2013 - Published: 6/17/2012 - Max, Fang
The Bucket List by ChickenNinja reviews
FULL SUMMARY INSIDE! When they were 7, Max and Nick created a bucket list-filled with 320 things to do. Follow their journey as they try to complete the most stupid and outrageous things on the list that they named, 'The Macmillan List'.FAX
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 9 - Words: 21,533 - Reviews: 197 - Favs: 57 - Follows: 84 - Updated: 9/29/2013 - Published: 9/13/2011 - Fang, Max
A Cinderella story Maximum ride style by gigglesandbooks reviews
Living in Arizona, Max lost her mom and now lives with her step father Jeb and his twin daughters- Lissa and Brigid. She the schools loser, but she has a voice. At the ball she meets Fang, her best friend's brother. FAX! no wings. R&R!
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 29 - Words: 91,120 - Reviews: 947 - Favs: 293 - Follows: 305 - Updated: 8/29/2013 - Published: 1/11/2012 - Max, Fang - Complete
Sparks Fly, Then They Burn by benjamming reviews
Max Martinez is a college drop-out, working as a maid in a five star hotel. Nick "Fang" Ride, a famous movie star, is staying there while he shoots a movie. When they meet, will sparks fly of the good or bad variety? Fax, Eggy, all human. (CURRENTLY BEING EDITED)
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 23 - Words: 37,743 - Reviews: 581 - Favs: 173 - Follows: 215 - Updated: 8/23/2013 - Published: 2/26/2012 - Max, Fang - Complete
Continue the Search by J La Loba reviews
You are sent out on assignment with Ed and Al. To help them on their travels to restore their bodies.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 14 - Words: 36,640 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 8/11/2013 - Published: 5/28/2008 - Edward E., Alphonse E.
Case Attraction by UberSpazTiclyAwesome reviews
Fang Ride, an FBI agent, finds quite the interesting case. A case no one bothered to get deep enough into. He decides it's time for this girl named Maximum Ride to be avenged- he's going to find her. Or at least who ever took her. T for paranoid. R&R?
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Mystery/Romance - Chapters: 11 - Words: 11,977 - Reviews: 126 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 66 - Updated: 8/10/2013 - Published: 3/6/2012 - Fang, Max
Smiles by bordeaux cookies reviews
Ever since Ari, Max's little brother, died, a smile's never escaped her lips. Her parents, desperate to get a grin in their daughter, pay people to get her to smile. When Fang and his father become their new housemates, he decides it's his project to make her smile. But will he be the first ever to succeed? FAX. AU. AH.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 10 - Words: 11,526 - Reviews: 319 - Favs: 152 - Follows: 232 - Updated: 8/10/2013 - Published: 9/22/2012 - Max, Fang
Beneath the Dirt Under the Ink by TAGGWRITC reviews
Max was a small country girl. Fang was a trouble making city boy. What happens when Fang's mom sends him to Max's family's farm to learn responsibility? Will the two get over their differences long enough to realize what they could be? FAX!
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 31 - Words: 55,538 - Reviews: 452 - Favs: 159 - Follows: 176 - Updated: 7/17/2013 - Published: 8/26/2012 - Max, Fang - Complete
I Met Him In Detention by Silent and courious reviews
Max and her dance group are the best dancers in town. A new boy moves into town and all the girls in school starts crushing on him. Except, Max and her bestfriend. When they both end up in detention together, they find out something they have in common. Fax, Iggy X OC, Ella x Iggy. Adopted from XxCoolLikeFirexX
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 8,551 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 41 - Updated: 7/15/2013 - Published: 8/24/2012 - Max, Fang
Scars by Sierra156 reviews
The Flock meet when they're put in a foster home together. They've all got a story- Fang blames himself for the death of his family; Max was abused by her father, and never really got over it. Read to find out the others' stories. Fax, Eggy, and no wings.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 28 - Words: 76,595 - Reviews: 1055 - Favs: 324 - Follows: 341 - Updated: 6/12/2013 - Published: 6/25/2011 - Max, Fang
Goodbye and Good Riddance by Heart Breaking 101 reviews
Hey, my names Max but you probably already knew that. Well here's what you didn't know about me: I'm abused, and I have to raise my two younger siblings while my Dad gets drunk. It's been this way ever since my Mom died. Well here's my hell- I mean life.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 22,908 - Reviews: 127 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 81 - Updated: 5/30/2013 - Published: 8/13/2012 - Max, Fang
The juvenile delinquent by maximumwolf242 reviews
follow the story of Fang,a teenager who is put in juvie after attacking one of his school classmates.He is then bailed out by a friend of his mothers, on his way to the house, he sees a girl.Something about her intrigues him,makes him interested.What happens when he finds out that he,becomes her brand new housemate? Read and find out.*Fang is the only one with wings, may change*
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 33 - Words: 65,929 - Reviews: 171 - Favs: 67 - Follows: 99 - Updated: 5/25/2013 - Published: 11/3/2012 - Fang, Max
The Jealousy Game by BandGeek321 reviews
When Fang is dating a red headed girl, that makes Max jealous, she'll do anything to get his attention.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 27 - Words: 30,149 - Reviews: 164 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 80 - Updated: 5/25/2013 - Published: 9/1/2012 - Max, Fang
A Boy, a Girl and a Sister by village bicycle reviews
"Max!" he yells. I fall silent and glower at him, my chest rising and falling at an increased tempo from my erratic breaths. / He takes two quick steps towards me, grabs my hip with one hand and a handful of my hair with the other, and kisses me. FAX, AU, and going through a strenuous editing process. No wings―or are there?
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 18 - Words: 67,352 - Reviews: 261 - Favs: 118 - Follows: 122 - Updated: 5/15/2013 - Published: 8/18/2011 - Max, Fang, Angel, Ella
Embers of Love by LoneRose23 reviews
With her life in shambles, Max is at the end of her rope when Fang walks into her life. Instantly sparks begin to fly between the two heating their relationship, which consists of nothing more than harsh words, cross looks, and burning arguments. But after time passes can they learn to let their fiery relationship burn into soft embers or will it blaze up and destroy them both?
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 30 - Words: 66,875 - Reviews: 194 - Favs: 64 - Follows: 75 - Updated: 5/10/2013 - Published: 11/25/2012 - Max, Fang - Complete
Karma's a Pain in the Butt by isleptwithkellinthesiren reviews
What happens when Max finds her boyfriend, Dylan playing tonsil hockey with the schools drama queen Lissa A.K.A Fangs girlfriend? How will she get her revenge? FAX all human. *this story is currently being edited*
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 23 - Words: 23,844 - Reviews: 225 - Favs: 77 - Follows: 102 - Updated: 5/9/2013 - Published: 3/16/2012 - Max, Fang
Band Meeting by Box of Frogs reviews
The Flock: a band struggling from the loss of their songwriter, Lissa. That is until the new girl shows up. Quiet but fierce and through Fang's eyes, stunning - her name is Maximum Ride. Lots of FAX. Set in England. No wings. Flock & Dylan all 14/15. No spoilers for readers who haven't finished the series. Rated T for swearing. Please R&R. ON HIATUS.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Suspense - Chapters: 11 - Words: 10,170 - Reviews: 99 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 67 - Updated: 4/28/2013 - Published: 10/3/2012 - Max, Fang
Roommates by TAGGWRITC reviews
Lissa and Max despise each other. They can barely stand in the same room as the other. Unfortunately, they are roommates in their college's dorm. Fang, is Lissa's boyfriend. What happens when after meeting Max, he can't get her out of his head? FAX!
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 29 - Words: 54,334 - Reviews: 388 - Favs: 135 - Follows: 141 - Updated: 3/29/2013 - Published: 8/3/2012 - Max, Fang - Complete
Enslaved by bibbler reviews
Max Ride is the girl who was kidnapped at the age of 8 and sold into slavery at the age of 14 to the Martinez family. Fang Martinez is the rich boy who buys Max since he and his family need someone new to toy with. Will Max put up with the constant teasing, jokes, and pranks? Or will she forget all about her developing love for a certain Martinez boy and just run away?
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 13,988 - Reviews: 178 - Favs: 70 - Follows: 148 - Updated: 3/29/2013 - Published: 6/28/2012 - Max, Fang
Let Me Sing You A Lullaby by LivenLifeUp reviews
When Nick Walkers girlfriend dies giving birth to their daughter,he is left to deal with the task of fatherhood alone.Six years on when Nick bumps into a x-high school sweetheart, maybe he doesn't have to deal with his lose alone. Full summary inside FAX EGGY ON HAITUS
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 26 - Words: 48,944 - Reviews: 286 - Favs: 102 - Follows: 164 - Updated: 3/25/2013 - Published: 4/20/2012 - Fang, Max
Maximum Military by coppercat100 reviews
Max gets sent to militay school in New Mexico and she meets a certain dark haired hottie. FAX FAX FAX FAX FAX FAX FAX FAX FAX!
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 2 - Words: 728 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 2/19/2013 - Published: 8/4/2012
Ghostly Pleasures by Ilovejolly16 reviews
The story of a life being able to see the supernatural. FAX
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Humor/Fantasy - Chapters: 29 - Words: 44,545 - Reviews: 408 - Favs: 124 - Follows: 131 - Updated: 1/21/2013 - Published: 6/26/2010 - Max, Fang
My Life In Arizona by this.bird-girl.is.on.fire reviews
Maximum Ride is moving to Arizona with her 3 siblings Ella Gazzy and Angel and her mom, Dr Martinez. Fang Batchelder has lived in Arizona his whole life. His friends are Iggy and Nudge, and they have a rather small band called the Flock. When him and Max meet, they become friends, bandmates and then... something more? FAX and EGGY!
Maximum Ride - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 11 - Words: 10,218 - Reviews: 62 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 28 - Updated: 1/10/2013 - Published: 8/26/2012 - Max, Fang
My Torturer, Back Again by Dot Ride reviews
Max had it all until her dad died. Then she was relentlessly bullied. So she moves away, to Arizona. There she finds one of the bullies that was also her former best friend. What will happen?
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 22 - Words: 46,709 - Reviews: 292 - Favs: 124 - Follows: 126 - Updated: 1/8/2013 - Published: 7/21/2012 - Max, Fang - Complete
The Fire Within by TalkingToYourselfAintWacko reviews
Sarcastic and badass Max has to move to L.A. leaving her friends and home in San Francisco but not her street fighting life.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 6 - Words: 10,614 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 36 - Updated: 1/6/2013 - Published: 8/30/2012 - Fang, Max
Falling For The Enemy by ChrisyLikesToEatMangoes reviews
Fang Ravensmith moved away, Maximum Ride thought all her troubles fled away with him. That is, until he returns, looking better than ever, starting up the constant bickering and sarcastic comments again. But maybe, just maybe, Max has had enough.FAX,R&R.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 21 - Words: 76,617 - Reviews: 873 - Favs: 210 - Follows: 260 - Updated: 1/4/2013 - Published: 4/25/2011 - Fang, Max
11 ways to Annoy Maximum Ride by Ruetheday reviews
Ever wondered what makes Max tick? Has she ever annoyed you? If so then this guide is right for you! Make her use some cheesy pick-up lines- to Jeb, and more! The title says it all! Now with the other members of the flock! :D R&R T to be safe.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,151 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 12/9/2012 - Published: 8/8/2012 - Max, Angel
After All These Years by savanityy reviews
Max hates Fang with everything in her. But will there relationship change when Fang finds out about her abusive boyfriend? MAJOR FAX FAX FAX FAX FAX!might be some Niggy. Teen for language, violence, and mild sexualness if that's even a word. My first fanfiction.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 10 - Words: 11,572 - Reviews: 69 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 41 - Updated: 12/7/2012 - Published: 6/24/2012 - Max, Fang
Ugh! School! by wolfrider3 reviews
When Max is taken from the school and put into the care of foster parents, how will she fare? And when she finds out that there is another winged foster? FAX!
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 28 - Words: 24,711 - Reviews: 129 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 11/28/2012 - Published: 4/28/2012 - Max
Popstar meets reality by Pinklover0 reviews
Maximum Ride is normal teenage girl living in California. Nick Walker aka Fang is a international superstar/party boy. What happens when Fang gets sent to Max's high school for the rest of the year. Will max give a chance and learn his secret. Fax and Eggy.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,506 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 11/26/2012 - Published: 11/24/2012 - Max, Fang
Assignment Marriage by HazelEyesDontTellLies reviews
What happens when Max & Nudge are shipped off to a finishing school and forced to marry Fang and Iggy, the biggest players in school? Read to find out! I'm not gonnna tell you! Better than it sounds! FAXNESS! & SOME NIGGY!
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 22 - Words: 56,907 - Reviews: 936 - Favs: 410 - Follows: 497 - Updated: 11/25/2012 - Published: 10/8/2011 - Max, Fang
After NEXT by QueenHimiko reviews
Lina and Gourry deal with the emotional aftermath of the events in NEXT. COMPLETE!
Slayers - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 13,545 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 11/25/2012 - Published: 11/4/2012 - Lina I., Gourry G. - Complete
Stuttering Heart by Sayuhm reviews
Max is the peppy gal with all the friends AKA Ms. Popular. What happens when a new kid comes along with a stuttering problem...When she stands up for him, will Lissa kick her off her thrown and take over? Go ahead and click on the title and read C:
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 7,179 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 11/18/2012 - Published: 6/12/2012 - Fang, Max
Stay? or Go? by Novastrike687 reviews
Max works at a dinner. Fang is an average customer/friend. Fang loved to annoy her, but he grew feelings for her and wants to be with her, Max however, she wants nothing to do with a relasionship. Her last boyfriend found out about her secret and thought she was a complete freak. What will Fang do when he finds out? FAX and yes Max is the ONLY one who has wings.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Fantasy - Chapters: 27 - Words: 21,600 - Reviews: 91 - Favs: 51 - Follows: 61 - Updated: 11/16/2012 - Published: 8/28/2012 - Max, Fang - Complete
The Weirdo on Park Avenue by AmiRide reviews
Nick's gotten off to a rocky start with Max, who happens to be in all of his classes and his tutor. Meanwhile, Max is having relationship issues with her boyfriend Dylan, and her cousin Iggy's trying to romance her half-sister, Ella, who has a giant crush on Gazzy, who likes Nudge. Also, Angel is on a quest to find Nick's Perfect Other Half... all part of the mess we call life. FAX
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,858 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 11/7/2012 - Published: 10/4/2012 - Max, Fang
Kiss Me by BlackSkinnyJeans101 reviews
Fang, Max, and Lisa used to be best friends until Fang starts to date Lisa. Fang confronts Max months later and they end up sleeping together. Max becomes pregnant and leaves her home with an unlimited credit card. Now Fang struggles to choose between his parent's respect and money or his own happiness. What will be the outcome of the Lovely Couple Trilogy? FAX, NIGGY *ON HIATUS*
Maximum Ride - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 7 - Words: 12,220 - Reviews: 77 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 53 - Updated: 10/13/2012 - Published: 9/23/2012 - Max, Fang
Words Unsaid by WordsUnsaid reviews
Max has had cancer since she was ten. She's 16 now Her friends dropped her once they found out and she stopped talking. When she goes to a new school will she make friends? Will a certain friend make her talk again? RE-WRITE OF MUTED CANDLE!
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Drama - Chapters: 21 - Words: 15,625 - Reviews: 442 - Favs: 68 - Follows: 76 - Updated: 10/10/2012 - Published: 5/28/2012 - Max
Bets always lead to broken hearts by Fangrules reviews
Fang Dente is the typical popular boy loved by everyone with one exception - Maximum Ride. She's the unbreakable. What happens when Fang agrees to a bet that will either make or break everything he's grown to love?
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 28 - Words: 31,479 - Reviews: 773 - Favs: 254 - Follows: 144 - Updated: 10/8/2012 - Published: 9/1/2010 - Max, Fang - Complete
Freak Fest by The Wolf Who Walks Alone reviews
Max is the main attraction of a theme park displaying mutants like animals. All that she wants is some company. That's when Fang, a mutant fighting champion comes along; Max's prearranged 'mate'. Will they succumb to 'fate' or will they clash instead? FAX
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 30 - Words: 128,866 - Reviews: 1218 - Favs: 289 - Follows: 279 - Updated: 10/3/2012 - Published: 4/19/2011 - Max, Fang
maximum to the emo by MizzBipolar reviews
hi, this is another max is in a foster home...adopted. but its better then all the other ones because it has Shadow in it. rated T for language and implied rape. i hope you like this story as much as my other one : plz R&R and read my other story
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 4 - Words: 9,908 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 9/23/2012 - Published: 7/14/2012 - Max
Every Angel Has It's Wings by MaximumRideFanFiction reviews
When Max's mom runs off with Iggy's dad to be together, Max and Iggy leave behind their best friend- Fang. Fang is constantly bullied at school, and the only person he has is Nudge, his adopted sister. What will happen when Fang's family moves to Arizona, and he finds his best friends there? And what happens when Lissa comes into the picture?
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 9 - Words: 9,419 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 9/14/2012 - Published: 8/21/2012 - Fang, Max
A Different Kind of Love by loveofallthatisawesome reviews
He's sorta with Lissa. She's sorta with Sam. They both are best friends, but when a spark of jealousy comes up, it makes them doubt the feelings that they have for each other. Do "best friends" have the urge to kiss the other? All the time? Written by Keepdreaming93.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 33 - Words: 78,388 - Reviews: 306 - Favs: 109 - Follows: 102 - Updated: 9/9/2012 - Published: 6/27/2012 - Fang, Max - Complete
Before I Self dEStruCt by iAmtheRebel16 reviews
Maximum Batchelder is Kinghorn Prep's resident troublemaker with anger management and a need for perfection. She doesn't try to get into fights; she doesn't try to make the teachers angry. She wants to be perfect. Nickolas Walker isn't a troublemaker.He talks back on purpose, he gets into fights every other day, and he wants to change Max, he wants her to enjoy life, but can she?
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,085 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 9/3/2012 - Published: 8/5/2012 - Fang, Max
White Balloons by WingAndSoulLover2000 reviews
what happens when Max and Fan get dragged to a karaoke place?i guess you'll never know unless you click it! i'm thinking about making it a 2 shot, maybe.
Maximum Ride - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 423 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Published: 9/3/2012 - Max, Fang
Did You Know? by Rohan's Doctor reviews
A nurse overhears Max spilling her heart to Fang, and she writes down what Max said. Originally a one-shot, but due to popular demand, extended to three-shot Rated T for mention of self-harm in second chapter
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,639 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 8/30/2012 - Published: 8/27/2012 - Max, Fang - Complete
You Don't Have to Be Alone by Vampirepoptartz333 reviews
Lissa and Max were best friends since they were five. That all changed two years ago. Max is different, a troublemaker and very closed off. What happens when her best friend Fang starts dating the root of her problems? AND WHAT ACCIDENT CHANGED MAX FOREVER? Angst. FAX FAX FAX FAX! AH AU
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 10 - Words: 12,606 - Reviews: 121 - Favs: 41 - Follows: 64 - Updated: 8/29/2012 - Published: 5/12/2012 - Max, Fang
INK'D by cydthesquid07 reviews
Max is a confusing girl who has had a hard life. She's been branded "freak" at school. Maybe because she's different? Maybe because she has an obsession with writing all over her arms till her skin is barely visible. No one understands. Or so she thought. Maybe one boy finally has her figured out.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,870 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 42 - Published: 8/23/2012 - Max, Fang
Cinderella? by LoveHappyEndings reviews
When Max/Cinderella refuses to go to a party thrown by Prince Fang, throw in a persistant sister and her friend, a fairy with an attitude and an oblivious step mother what do you get? No really, what do you get?
Maximum Ride - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,198 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 8/22/2012 - Published: 8/20/2012 - Max, Fang - Complete
Try and Live My Life by ARMADILLO76 reviews
Max, a 15 year-old foster child has had a rough life. She has no friends at school besides her foster brother, Iggy. Will there be a new kid that comes along and wants to be friends with them? This is my first fanfic so be nice! Hope you enjoy it!
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Romance - Chapters: 9 - Words: 8,410 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 8/22/2012 - Published: 2/23/2012 - Max, Fang
All New by Truth Be Told I'm Lying reviews
"You don't understand," I said coldly, shaking my head. "I didn't just leave because of that one thing. You were long gone even before it. That was just the spark. But I'm back now. I'm back, and I'm an all new person: stronger and better. You won't ever hurt me again." Though, what I never guessed was that in the end, it would be him being hurt by me. DISCONTINUED
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 7 - Words: 16,039 - Reviews: 79 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 50 - Updated: 8/22/2012 - Published: 6/17/2012 - Max, Fang
I am only me when I am with you by Vampirepoptartz333 reviews
Max is at a new school and she meets Fang and his "Flock". Suckish summary, but read it. Fist fanfic. FAX, Eggy, and a couple oc characters.All human. Rated T cuz I'm extremely paranoid. AU. Songfic-like but not until later chapters.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 17 - Words: 21,478 - Reviews: 69 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 38 - Updated: 8/21/2012 - Published: 3/31/2012 - Max, Fang
All I Want Is You, Fang by Untamed Roses reviews
Max and Fang are happily together and Dylan still wants Max. Figures. But when a new girl named Serah appears and pursues Fang does Max have some competition?
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 17 - Words: 29,025 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 8/20/2012 - Published: 6/8/2012 - Max, Fang
The Overly Dramatic LIfe of Maximum Ride by Azn-Wemo reviews
"Why was I, Maximum Ride, buttkicking warrior doing under Nick Moretti's bed?"Set in an AU where Fang never met the winged flock."It involved me punching him in the face, him showing his wings, a streaking Iggy and the flock.I knew high school was hell."
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 8 - Words: 8,858 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 7/28/2012 - Published: 3/17/2012 - Max, Fang
Recover by Sinca reviews
Max and her brother, Ari, have had a hard life, abused by their father, Jeb. When they finally escape their situation will they be able to recover or will they be scarred for life? Fax, as usual. Rated T for implied rape.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Family - Chapters: 22 - Words: 16,986 - Reviews: 144 - Favs: 62 - Follows: 53 - Updated: 7/21/2012 - Published: 6/24/2012 - Max, Ari B. - Complete
Awakening Once More by bordeaux cookies reviews
Oh yeah, my name is Max. Maximum Ride. The Queen of Wit & Retorts. The Kick-Ass Champion. The Almighty Dictator. The Maximum Ride of thrill you can get, that no one is willing to take. Max, the homeless and abused... is at home? My life is soo screwed up.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Drama - Chapters: 11 - Words: 16,369 - Reviews: 64 - Favs: 61 - Follows: 46 - Updated: 7/21/2012 - Published: 10/27/2011 - Max, Fang - Complete
Experiment 5 point 0 by Dark Angel aka DementiaJackson reviews
max catches fang cheating on her and runs away. she meets some new experiments and has a child of her own. Please read. better than it sounds. you can even make your own character. R&R. PLEASE READ!
Maximum Ride - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 8 - Words: 6,015 - Reviews: 58 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 7/17/2012 - Published: 6/3/2011 - Max, Fang
Fool Me Once by Vegetarians Rock reviews
What would you do if your Father walked out on your family for someone else? Maximum Ride, deals with it by getting in fights and causing trouble. Until she meets Fang. A misterious guy who may or may not have feelings for her. They become the best of friends. That is until something happens. Something HUGE. Will it change them forever? Major FAXness! Please read!
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 7 - Words: 5,667 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 7/1/2012 - Published: 6/27/2012
Supernatural Love by FaxlastsForever reviews
Max and Iggy move to Austin thinking they're the only ones with special powers. Then they meet others who are just like them. Before they know it, Max and Fang start to fall for each other, but one day someone from Max's horrible past shows up. Max can't ever forget about her horrifying past now, and she can't hide or keep it a secret now.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 7 - Words: 8,583 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 6/27/2012 - Published: 4/21/2012 - Max, Fang
Broken Body, Broken Mind by XxWritingFanaticxX reviews
Max's biological father, Jeb, died years ago, along with her mother in a car accident. Her foster father, Noah, abuses her. When she goes to her new school, she meets the flock. Rated T because I'm paranoid
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 19,548 - Reviews: 84 - Favs: 64 - Follows: 61 - Updated: 6/27/2012 - Published: 7/11/2011 - Max, Fang
Bound by Blood by Nightwhisp reviews
Fang's always had a pretty suckish life, abused by his father in every way, but now he's free. Living on the city streets but free. But what will happen when he meets Max? And who's the mysterious man that looks so familiar and claims to be his brother?
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 6 - Words: 13,951 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 28 - Updated: 6/20/2012 - Published: 11/23/2011 - Fang
One Word Pain by FantasyRomanceGirl21 reviews
This story was adopted from Gothvampire01 Max is abused by her dad and still tries to protect her two younger sibilings and her mom.Max moves and meets Fang will he be her savior or will he be too late
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 7 - Words: 5,804 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 6/12/2012 - Published: 5/31/2012 - Max, Fang
Band Kids by funsizepotato reviews
Max is forced to move away from California suddenly to a small town in Minnesota, leaving her precious friends. Will she be able to survive a new High School? FAX eventually. No wings. Also they are in band...T because i am paranoid.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,882 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 5/27/2012 - Published: 4/15/2012 - Max, Fang
Maximum Pain by Sinca reviews
Max is abused. Then she meets Fang. Will he be able to convince her to tell her story? Or will she live like this forever? T because I'm paranoid.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 22 - Words: 20,542 - Reviews: 84 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 5/23/2012 - Published: 5/9/2012 - Max, Fang - Complete
When Two Worlds Collide by Tattooed Wings reviews
Max is rich, lives by the rules, and never knew any other life than the one she has now. Until she meets Fang. He lives in the 'bad' parts, is a rebel, and loves having fun. ALL HUMAN! FAX! Full summary inside. Story is definiely better than summary.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 12,290 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 44 - Updated: 5/1/2012 - Published: 12/11/2011 - Max, Fang
Not Alone by MyNameIsCAL reviews
Jeb abuses Max,kills Mom and Ella.Max enters an abuse rehab place,meeting Fang and his friends.Afraid Jeb will hurt her again,Max feels vulnerable.Fang makes her feel safe again and shows her she can move on.She shows him he can live life again.No wings.
Maximum Ride - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 35 - Words: 41,030 - Reviews: 460 - Favs: 206 - Follows: 210 - Updated: 4/8/2012 - Published: 5/18/2010 - Max, Fang
Revenge by Maximum Ninja reviews
Max is walking home from school one day when Fang, the emo, attacks her.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 412 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 3 - Published: 6/28/2011
Shadows of the Past by alpha-range reviews
Max has a pretty screwed up life: an abusive father, an evil step-mother and a brother to care for. When things get blown out of hand, Max finds herself faced with the realisation that she needs help. Eventual Fax, although different couples first. R&R.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 16 - Words: 32,343 - Reviews: 217 - Favs: 86 - Follows: 82 - Updated: 5/27/2011 - Published: 7/24/2010 - Max, Fang
Orphan Twins by Maxgirl97 reviews
Max and Iggy are 15 year old orphan twins with wings. They have been to alot of homes but all the homes either hit them or ignore them. What will happen when they find a place with people who really care? FAX. Maybe NIGGY. Rated T
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,708 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 14 - Published: 11/21/2010
Slayers Expecting by QueenHimiko reviews
Lina and Gourry have settled down, and now must contend with the challenges of pregnancy. Trad pairings. Frank depictions of pregnancy and birth. If you are squicked by birth, do not read! Minor cussing.
Slayers - Rated: T - English - Family - Chapters: 3 - Words: 28,097 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 10/3/2010 - Published: 5/2/2010 - Lina I., Gourry G. - Complete
Snowstorm by Underwater Polkadots reviews
Love can bloom in many different ways. YukiXOC Rating for violence. Rating my change at a later date. Currently disabled.
Fruits Basket - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 3 - Words: 5,722 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 3/28/2010 - Published: 8/25/2008 - Yuki S.
Emotionless by ChibiBakaTTATT reviews
Fang finally unravels his true feelings to Max but will Max accept her feelings for him? Why was she holding back something she had been waiting for forever? T. FAX, FAX, FAX, FAX, FAX, FAX, FAX, FAX!
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 2 - Words: 377 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 1/18/2010 - Published: 1/17/2010 - Fang, Max
Stay? by Anna-Belikov-Fuller reviews
An OOC, vulnerable version of FAX. Enjoy!
Maximum Ride - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,517 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/28/2009 - Max, Fang - Complete
Truth or Dare by Bex Baxter reviews
The Flock is visiting Dr. Martinez and Ella. When Nudge and Angel convince Max to play truth or dare, chaos ensues. FAX and some EGGY.
Maximum Ride - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 484 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 21 - Published: 11/29/2009 - Max, Fang
Burning by Kurisuta reviews
A girl with uncontrollable fire powers moves into the Sohma house. KyoxOC YukixOC
Fruits Basket - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 7 - Words: 2,688 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 4/5/2009 - Published: 3/17/2009 - Yuki S., Kyo S. - Complete
Truth or Dare by lena kelley reviews
max asked who whats to play truth or dare how many secrets come out will they regret playing find out
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 4,423 - Reviews: 63 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 27 - Updated: 1/10/2009 - Published: 10/9/2008
Fall For You by kashiena reviews
a fax songfic.
Maximum Ride - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 528 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/17/2008 - Complete
May's Crush: Final Frontier by PikamasterADV reviews
The Sequel to May's Crush, so be sure to read that, first! Ash and May go on an exciting trip to the Sevii Islands. What adventures await them there? Updates when Updates are done.
Pokémon - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 37 - Words: 133,484 - Reviews: 595 - Favs: 357 - Follows: 196 - Updated: 4/29/2008 - Published: 11/23/2006
Remember by Serenity Vi Britannia reviews
Who am I? she asked as she looked in the mirror. YukixOC
Fruits Basket - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 7 - Words: 9,962 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 2/27/2007 - Published: 2/18/2007 - Yuki S., Kyo S.
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Fame reviews
Max's life is great, she has the fame, the looks and the money. But when new time guitarist Fang comes along will he unearth her secrets? Or will he lose himself in the fame? (REWRITE)
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 722 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/15/2014 - Max, Fang, Iggy, OC
Red reviews
"Mommy!" my baby screamed as she was ripped away from me. "Red" I said desperately trying to reach her as the world faded from my view. Fax AU R&R
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 211 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 5/19/2013 - Published: 9/1/2012 - Max, Fang