halfAsoul
hide bio
PM . Follow . Favorite
Joined 02-11-12, id: 3715483, Profile Updated: 06-18-13

lol heya

cuz its funny...

Hello, and welcome to the Mental Health Hotline If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.
If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.

If you have multiple personalities, press 3,4,5, and 6.

If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call.
If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transferred to your mother ship.

If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which button to press.

If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, no one will answer.

If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the hash key until a representative comes on the line.
If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, and date of birth, social security number and your mother's maiden name.

If you have post traumatic stress disorder, slowly and carefully press 000.
If you have bipolar disorder, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep. Or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.
If you have short term memory loss, press 9.
If you have short term memory loss, press 9. If you have short term memory loss, press 9.
If you have low self-esteem, please hang up. All our operators are too busy to talk to you.
Repost this if you wish you were the one who recorded the voice mail...

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Home Also I Cannot Go by soonanemone reviews
On his first trip to Earth, 15 year old Spock runs into a certain rebellious young man from Iowa; confusing as their night together is, he's sure everything will return to normal when he gets home... KxS, Spock centric part one. Part two now up! Mpreg.
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: M - English - Angst - Chapters: 49 - Words: 279,901 - Reviews: 1597 - Favs: 874 - Follows: 1,251 - Updated: 5/15/2014 - Published: 9/20/2009 - Spock, J. Kirk
Clothes Make the Man by KCS reviews
Five times Spock wore something other than his uniform, and one time he was only too glad to put the uniform back on. Answer to an LJ writing prompt for non-uniform!clothes!love. Triumvirate gen!fic, highly likely to include fluff, angst, crack, and anything else you usually see from me. You have been warned. Last Chapter technically an AOS crossover, full warnings inside.
StarTrek: The Original Series - Rated: T - English - Friendship - Chapters: 6 - Words: 30,311 - Reviews: 111 - Favs: 121 - Follows: 50 - Updated: 7/7/2013 - Published: 6/6/2013 - J. Kirk, L. McCoy, Spock - Complete
The Omega by themuller reviews
According to the text books, breaking the bond between an Alpha and his Omega results in the death of the Omega. When John's Alpha, Professor Moriarty, is savagely murdered nobody expects John to survive. Still, here he is, alive and kicking - trying to start a new life, while clearing his name, and keeping unbonded Alphas at bay. - Beware: Omegaverse! Might contain triggers.
Sherlock - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Chapters: 13 - Words: 47,091 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 135 - Follows: 93 - Updated: 4/5/2013 - Published: 1/26/2013 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete
Fate's Favourite by The Fictionist reviews
You always get the stories where Harry goes back into Tom Riddle's time, then either stays or gets sent back. End of, unless he tries to make Voldemort good. But what if things went differently? What if, just once, someone followed a time traveller back?
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Drama - Chapters: 151 - Words: 315,509 - Reviews: 5528 - Favs: 2,723 - Follows: 1,312 - Updated: 9/22/2012 - Published: 2/7/2010 - Harry P., Tom R. Jr. - Complete
Dumb and Ditzy by TimelessTears reviews
AU. Years of being bullied for his smarts left him dreading when people figured out he was a genius. What better way to throw them off then by acting stupid? Enter: Dumb Blonde Spencer Reid.
Criminal Minds - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 13 - Words: 71,842 - Reviews: 614 - Favs: 1,692 - Follows: 552 - Updated: 8/10/2012 - Published: 9/22/2011 - S. Reid - Complete
The Precious of Gaia by Tonzura123 reviews
Merlin cannot move when made of stone, but the faint light and witching eyes make it seem like he almost might... AU. Heroic!Arthur. No slash.
Merlin - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Friendship - Chapters: 3 - Words: 8,388 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 33 - Updated: 4/9/2012 - Published: 12/20/2011 - Arthur, Merlin - Complete
Purposely Physical by Celianna reviews
Momoshiro and Kaidoh sure get physical a lot. MomoKai.
Prince of Tennis - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 40,268 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 60 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 2/24/2012 - Published: 2/16/2012 - Kaidoh K., Momoshiro T. - Complete
Men With Beards by snotweird reviews
The trick is growing old without growing up.
Merlin - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 461 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 60 - Follows: 8 - Published: 1/27/2012 - Arthur, Merlin - Complete
One Hundred by Ultra-Geek reviews
100 drabbles, 10000 words. Complete! A collection of unrelated drabbles and plot bunnies. Home of the original Cupboard!Merlin.
Merlin - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 100 - Words: 17,296 - Reviews: 3602 - Favs: 812 - Follows: 283 - Updated: 7/23/2011 - Published: 4/12/2011 - Merlin, Arthur - Complete
Let It All Go by Me Or The Wallpaper reviews
Despite being lightyears away from home, he is attempting to follow Vulcan doctorine. To remain objective in every situation. To treat his own life at school and the world around him as a scientific study. A captivating homeless boy complicates this. AU
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 8 - Words: 33,569 - Reviews: 139 - Favs: 134 - Follows: 231 - Updated: 6/22/2011 - Published: 3/31/2011 - Spock, J. Kirk
Improbability by Neomeneomine reviews
AU off the Hitchhiker's Guide. Cadet Kirk, while trying to create a machine capable of generating an infinite improbability field, accidentally makes a sentient machine instead, a machine calling himself 'Spock'. What does one do with an android? slow!K/S
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 17 - Words: 68,131 - Reviews: 110 - Favs: 124 - Follows: 72 - Updated: 2/21/2011 - Published: 6/22/2010 - J. Kirk, Spock - Complete
Observations by jAnon reviews
First Officer Spock comments on life aboard the Enterprise and his service under Captain James T. Kirk.
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: M - English - Sci-Fi/Romance - Chapters: 263 - Words: 427,041 - Reviews: 1217 - Favs: 853 - Follows: 325 - Updated: 5/8/2010 - Published: 8/24/2009 - Spock, J. Kirk - Complete
Harry's New Home by kbinnz reviews
One lonely little boy. One snarky, grumpy git. When the safety of one was entrusted to the other, everyone knew this was not going to turn out well... Or was it? AU, sequel to "Harry's First Detention". OVER FOUR MILLION HITS!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 64 - Words: 318,389 - Reviews: 10684 - Favs: 6,121 - Follows: 2,303 - Updated: 10/16/2009 - Published: 7/31/2008 - Harry P., Severus S. - Complete
Folie a Deux by Persepolis130 reviews
Scorpius Malfoy wears a permanent invisibility cloak and dreams of growing wings. Al wishes he were half that cool and has the nail polish to prove it. Albus/Scorpius AS/S, Harry/Draco H/D, other pairings incl. slash and het
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 18 - Words: 57,439 - Reviews: 287 - Favs: 418 - Follows: 69 - Updated: 7/10/2009 - Published: 3/8/2009 - Scorpius M., Albus S. P. - Complete
The Strange Story of the Boy and the Fox by volta arovet reviews
The fox returns and Tanuma finds himself more popular than he likes, but they'll probably get out of this alive.
Natsume Yūjin-Chō - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,150 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 60 - Follows: 14 - Published: 6/10/2009 - Kaname T.
Being a Master at Ignoring the Obvious by sockpuppet82 reviews
“Look,” he said, pointing somewhere behind Malfoy’s head. “Something expensive.” Ron's a fellow master at ignoring the obvious, Hermione's easy to distract, and Draco...Harry's not sure if Draco's just humouring him, or really really dense.H/D slash&crack
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,787 - Reviews: 228 - Favs: 964 - Follows: 101 - Published: 2/25/2009 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete