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Author has written 25 stories for Inuyasha, Harry Potter, Ib, Panty & Stocking with Garterbelt/パンティ＆ストッキングwithガーターベルト, Eyeshield 21, Ouran High School Host Club, Naruto, Kuroshitsuji, Yu Yu Hakusho, Saiyuki, Beelzebub/べるぜバブ, Anime X-overs, xxxHOLiC, Fairy Tail, Avengers, and Vampire Knight.
Alexandria "Fuyu" Fumina Dela Cruz A.k.a Black R. Lust passed last April 27 2016 5:37 am. All stories published here can be adopted taken or continued by anyone who is interested. I will not be releasing any details whatsoever.
Have a good day.
Rest in Peace dear sister.
-Alexa Sarah Dela Cruz
This is Lex. Alex and Sarah's childhood friend.
Its been more than half a year, since Alex left... And none of us were able to look at things we know were important to her, not until now that is. Alex has three major things she left in our care. Her family, Her works, and Her memory.
Sarah declined to continue her literature, saying it reminded he too much that she is now alone. Saying that she cannot continue something they both worked on.
So Im here.
I do not know how everything in here works, but I am willing to try. For her sake. I know how much this little escape in reality means to her, so I wouldnt let it just wither here. Ive been a silent follower of her, despite her genre in writing differs to mine. I was curious about the pleased glints in her eyes whenever she finished facing her computer, curious about how satisfied she looks.
Even now, as I am typing this, the ache is there. And some weird feeling of guilt is here, settled deep in my gut. Is it because Im touching something important to her? Or is it because Im invading something special she shares with her sister?
Nevertheless, I am Lexis, a nobody compared to the once lively Alex. You mightve noticed the similarities we shared in our names. Thats the special bond we have. Its funny, looking at the past. It was me and Sarah first, for shes always been the friendlier of the two. Then she introduced me her pretty older sister.
We did not clicked. We fought, a lot. And we still do even in our older years. But she has no idea how cherished she was to me.
And I was never given the chance to tell her so.
Ever since the accident, she changed. Alex has always been suffering some sort of inferiority complex... One of the reason why she liked Kagome's character in the first place, finding solace on mutual feelings with a fictional character. Im not sure why, but somehow, she took the scar on her face as a blow to her confidence.
And she has me to blame.
Like all boys, I teased her, saying she aint pretty, saying shes such a tomboy.
Saying no guy will go for her cause shes much more manlier and loud than they are.
But I do... Or I wanted to.
Years of easy teasing piled up and overflowed. I never did know that my words had affected her that much.
She began collapsing in herself then. Alex tried so hard to hide it from us, shes always been some sort of a masochist, and we're too blind to see.
It festered, grew. And all it took was one incident with a mirror and a pretty lady for us to see what she really felt.
Her parents' attitude did not help things. I will not be going into specifics but things happened and they separated.
And so did Alex and Sarah.
That was a very big blow Alex didnt need at that time. She took off, tried to live on her own and I joined her, knowing shell need me, need someone to be there when nobody was.
Things fell into place and it was naive of me to think that she's finally recovering. I was too careless, too lazy. Since I was seeing her functioning well, I thought that shes finally fine.
That was my downfall.
I dont know if this is how this 'profile' is supposed to be but I guess I at least have to share some sort of explanation to you, Alex's friends and followers.
I know her works wont be the same but Ill try my hardest.
With much love that was abandoned, Lexis.
Alex was well loved. Even here. Its obvious. She so damn loved. I find myself reading all of your kind words. I apologize but it didnt help. But Im not saying I dont want them. I accept the feeling of defeat and anger I felt whenever I read the phrase 'its not your fault'. Because when it comes down to it, I failed her. I wasnt there. I wasnt there when she needed me the most. All I saw, or perhaps, all I chose to see were her smiles and signs that she's ok. It was stupid of me.
Sarah read my attempt on continuing her story. She laughed. Then she cried.
'You really do know her best. You even think like her.' she kept on saying. I wanted to yell at her. Tell her no. Because if I really knew her she wouldve still be here. By my side. Our side.
I read her little notes, kind of surprised she planned so far ahead. And it hurts. A lot. Cause I was touching something she had been so proud of.
Its hard. I tried to continue but its hard. There was this constant nagging that Im butchering what was left of her. But I dont want to let this go. Will I be responsible of her death the second time?
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