Author has written 23 stories for Sanctuary, Star Trek: 2009, Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., and Flash.
British single female. Aged 29.
Find all my works along with other projects on my Tumblr page:
So I posted my last fanfic 2 days ago and here is why it’ll be the last I’ll post:
I’ve been writing fanfic for years, each story had been a struggle to write as every word I typed I had to battle with low confidence in myself that I could write anything decent. More words made up a chapter and once again I was battling with myself on whether to post or not. In my earlier days when I was writing Sanctuary the community was good and my low confidence wasn’t as low as it is now. Years have gone by and new fandoms found and stories written but stress and depression have mad that battle with myself turn into a full blown war to the point of taking months between updating till now it’s been nearly a year I think.
The whole community has changed and moved on, stories may be read but no comments are made so writers are sitting there wondering did I do something wrong? Something I have noticed is the more comments a story has the more attention it’ll get, reviews are like a star rating for fanfic. The stories I came up with were always unusual and I knew not everyone’s cup of tea but still this is the world of fanfic and anything should be possible.
That is until I started doing Agents of SHIELD and was truly introduced to the evil side of shipper wars and how certain ships literally control what is acceptable or not within their ship. Break the rules and you get snubbed out. It was so ugly I gave up with that fandom, even to this day I can barely watch the show because of those people ruining my experience.
So moved onto the Flash at a late point but still the community seemed great so stuck around and brought my crazy ideas into the mix. But it seems recently the Flash community has divided and the usual main contributors have gone or shifted within the community which is fine as everyone has a shift in their likes. Like recently I have gotten into Steampunk and Abney Park and noticed lots of things I liked had some elements in there so guess my heart has always been a bit of a steam punker lol.
However, no matter how much you try to hide in a fictional world, the real world will also be snapping at your back and I’ve hit such an all-time low. I’m finding I hate my work; I can’t even write anything to continue stories I have started. In truth anyone who knows and has spoken to me about my fics know I have hated every single one, especially any involving smut as I never ever wanted to write it, just wanted to have fics that really anyone could read at any place.
So now I feel I just can’t do fanfics anymore, so any I have done and not completed will be on permeant hold. I still have lots of notes and or bits and pieces started for chapters or other stories if there is anyone out there who wants to take them.
But the whole fanfic experience hasn’t been for nothing. There may be some sort of light at the end of the tunnel.
For the last 15yrs I’ve had in my mind a novel I would like to write, and even though I hate my fanfics this is something I really want to do so I’m hoping that my years at writing fanfic has taught me a few things like how to set scenes and characters enough that I can pull this novel idea off. Who knows maybe in years to come it will find a crazy enough publisher and you’ll all get to see it lol